#you may notice that i almost never draw solo character art

[evercelle]

This is purely curiosity, but are you going to draw scaramouche's new design? He seems right up your alley 👀

ahhhh i DO love his redesign! and after finishing the 3.2 AQ, i rewatched his animated backstory cutscene and sat there sort of just marveling at what a wonderfully written villain he is (': i'm very excited to see where his story goes next!

as to whether or not i'd draw him, maybe not in full, but i had a charm idea i was thinking of lately...!! he's become an anemo guy i'm almost contractually obligated to do so

[eijirousbestie]

I’m not sure if my request have been sent to you or not but here we ge. Bakugou drawing with reader this time just quite and pace a day later he would notice reader putting his drawing in a nice and viable place in her wall like she is proud of him , im craving for some fluff🥹

Yes I got your last request too!! I try to crank these new stories out at least twice a month cuz of daily life but I got around to it today🫵🏽 I’ll combine ur last request with this one since it’s kinda the same premise. As always thank y’all for reading and I hope you enjoy! If y’all have any special requests PLS SHARE THEM WITH ME!! I’d love to write them<33

“Stick to art.”

painting together

peaceful silence

Bakugou is actually good at painting

may or may not have based the painting off of one I actually made…

* * *

“For the love of god will you stop hogging all the white paint?”

“Quit whinin’ will ya? I’ll hand it back just give me a sec here.” You in fact did not get the paint back in a few seconds. With the way he’s got it in a death grip you’re not entirely sure it’ll survive the trip back to you.

“Katsuki, your knuckles are literally turning white from how hard you’re squeezing the tube. You don’t even need that much.”

“You know the more you talk the less “enjoyable” this bright idea of yours is.” He places the tube of paint down on the ground next to your knee.

You both are in your dorm room, your usual tarp covering the flooring under you from any stray paint splatters. It was your grand idea to have the both of you paint together. Actually, it was to prove to Bakugou that painting wasn’t as easy as he chucked it up to be. It started with his comments about your art earlier in the week. You were working on another project for class and spent hours painting and refining the details. The boisterous blonde disrupted your thoughts in place of his own. Why the hell’s this taking so long? It’s just an apple, he’d question. To him, a painting should never take more than at least two hours tops. If anything, watching you paint for hours on end was the coolest thing to him because how could someone have that much patience? He’d never admit it though. And now here you both are, having a painting session in your room to prove to him it’s not as easy as he thinks.

Grabbing the now freed white paint you add a small glob of it to your palette, mixing the specific color you needed. You both have already been painting for almost an hour. It’s Saturday and you didn’t have anything better to do. Before you both started, you’d searched Pinterest for painting ideas. Scrolling through various cartoon characters, Bakugou settles on painting a simple white skull against a black background. The reference is such a him choice. You chose yours a little while after him but refused to tell him your idea. He rolled his eyes and started sketching on the small canvas you’d given him, occasionally asking you if his proportions were accurate.

You both had fallen into a quiet peace. The windows drawn to let the last bits of sun in. The soft sounds of your music thrumming through your small speaker. The slosh of water being dirtied up in solo cups as Bakugou cleans his brush. Just all around good vibes and harmless bickering here and there. You swear you’ve never seen him so relaxed, other than the time he fell asleep while you were drawing him. You look up from your canvas and catch a glimpse of Bakugou’s face. Trimmed eyebrows pinched together in a stare of pure concentration, his lips slightly tucked in as he works on the details of the skull.

His painting technique is quite impressive. Understandably not to your level, but if he took art seriously he could be one hell of an artist. The way he changes the pressure of his grip when outlining the teeth of the skull has you eyeing his piece in astonishment. Where the hell did he learn that from?

“You gonna keep starin’ at my shit or are you actually gonna give your input.” Your gaze lifts from his painting to him. You give a slightly confused look.

“Wait what.”

“Asked if I was doing this line stuff right but you looked lost as hell. Told you to leave that dope alone.” You roll your eyes.

“Ya mama. And yeah you’re doing it right. Just don’t make em too thick.” He side eyes you so hard you’re sure his eyes are about to roll out of his head.

“You’re lucky I’m goin’ to therapy.”

“Aren’t we all.” You give a brief chuckle and continue to work on your painting. The light pink background against the chosen figures ties the whole piece together. A particular song plays from the shuffle queue of your music library. It’s one that you and Bakugou both know. You quietly hum along, bobbing your head. Your ears pick up a rather deep tremor that joins your humming. He’s humming along too, eyes laser focused on his work. In the most non-corny way possible, you try to harmonize with him, doing decent until you miss a note halfway through. He makes sure you’re aware he noticed.

“Stick to art.” He snickers, shoulders softly shaking.

“Mind your business.”

“I’ll do what I wanna do.” He retorts. He’s so sassy and for what.

Another couple hours pass and you’ve both finished your paintings. Katsuki lifts his painted skull with pride, his ego through the roof. It’s actually a pretty solid painting. Albeit, simple, but not bad at all.

“Goddamn Kats, you didn’t do half bad.” You chide with a grin.

“Damn right. Told you this shit’s easy. Just gotta get over gettin stuck in the details.”

“That’s funny because you asked for my help with line work but go off I guess.”

“You’re just a resource. Gotta use what I can to get where I need to be.”

“Damnnn ouch. That’s all I am to you? Katsuki I’m hurt.” You feign heartbreak as you dramatically hold your hand over your heart.

“Idiot. You gonna show me what you ended up paintin’ or not?” You nod, grabbing your canvas and flipping it over to show him your piece.

His eyes are met with an image of two bears, one white, one brown. Their cheeks are smushed together in some sort of side hug. The brown bear does not look amused. He clicks his tongue and tilts his head.

“You really love cutesy shit don’t you?”

You shrug. “Not my fault the Pinterest bears were cute. Stay mad but I’m in my bag.”

“The fuck’s that even mean-”

“Shhh you’re being a hater right now.” He shakes his head as he chuckles deeply, shoving his hands in the pockets of his sweats.

“Yeah you’re really lucky I’m in therapy.” You laugh with him and reach for his painting that he left on the ground.

“You gonna leave this behind after you worked so hard on it?” You question. He shrugs.

“Don’t really got a place for it. I ain’t really into displaying things like you. You keep it or something.” You hold onto both paintings as he announces his departure to his room.

The next morning, he wakes up and starts his usual routine. Shower, brushing his teeth and skincare. The shuffle of his house shoes fills the quiet of the halls as he journeys to your room to make sure you’re up to go on your Sunday morning run together. He knocks once, twice and gets no reply. He jiggles the doorknob and he finds it unlocked, meaning you’re probably not inside. He opens your door and looks around to find no you. But what he does find makes his face go warm. There on the wall adjacent to the door, hangs his skull painting right next to yours. A ghost of a smile graces his lips as he shakes his head, closing the door to your room to go and grab you for your run.

bonus: the paintings y’all made

Bakugou’s:

Yours: *optional*

fun fact this is actually a painting I made a few months ago😭

[flightyquinn]

I'd like to share something with you, Tumblr.

When I first played D&D 3.5, many years ago now, I played a bard named Wren, using a homebrew race that you could find on the official Wizards forums around that time called the Kassuri. He was a goofy little manlet with the ears and tail of a fox who knew no fear. He got to ride on the back of a luck dragon.

He tamed a shocker lizard and named it Tazer. He once drank a whole bucket of dwarven ale without getting drunk, and then shouted, "I said a large glass!" and another time bluffed a group of elven soldiers that the Half-orc paladin was his pet. When a demon killed his mentor, he avenged them and made a coat out of the demon's wings.

He fought his former friend turned enemy, almost died, and won. He got knighted by his king after starting the campaign exiled from his homeland, and then prayed so hard to be a better person that his alignment shifted right before going to face the final boss. When he realized the BBEG was sensitive to sounds and played a heavy metal lute solo so sick that it literally caused their Fortress of Evil to collapse.

It was a silly game, played fast and loose by a group that only half understood the rules, but it was a blast to play. After having some not-so-good experiences with AD&D (may I never forget The Exploding Cleric), it was the first game I ever played to the end of a campaign. I loved the game, and I love my group from back then...Hothgoth, Lios, Pixie, Elena, Leif, and even the others who came in later and didn't stick around as long. I've held onto those memories, and my beloved "first successful character", ever since.

Until the tail end of last year, I never had any decent art of him.

This is Wren, almost perfectly as I envisioned him all those years ago.

The sad truth is, unless you're an artist yourself, it can be hard to get character art for TTRPGs. Most people I know in the hobby don't have a lot of money, and even if they do you never know how long a character may last before getting killed by bad rolls. Back in the day, for the game Wren is from, we just used a text description and imagined the character. These days, most people I know use a virtual table top. Characters need tokens (and usually profile pictures for when other players check the sheet), and for hardcore players like me that are in several games a week, that's a lot of art that could need swapped out on a moment's notice.

The sad truth is, people just steal it. Even the people I know who are artists steal art, only really drawing characters they get attached to. We discuss what images would be good for characters, show one-another what we've found, and it's not uncommon to decide details about a character based on what kind of a picture you can find for them. So...when AI art started becoming a thing, I got excited.

Artist Tumblr probably noticed right away that the picture up there is AI generated. It's a pretty good output, but there's still telltale signs. Yes I notice them, and no they don't bother me. It's better than any of the attempts I ever made at doing a picture myself, and even if I could afford a picture of that level of quality, who knows if the artist I found would be able to fully understand my description the way I see it in my head, or if they would be willing to put in the time and effort to revise it to my satisfaction. It was going to be imperfect either way, but I was able to take time (a frankly ridiculous amount) to tweak things and start over and try different approaches until it was to my satisfaction.

...and like I said, I make a lot of characters. Now, instead of just finding some picture I like and stealing it wholesale, I end up generating a lot of character art. It's just for my personal use either way, and thanks to AI, I get to express my own ideas.

I know some people out there are abusing the technology to make a quick buck, but please remember that's a fault of those people. There are people abusing just about every technology out there. For other people, who are only trying to use it to express themselves or to do things without needing an additional skillset they don't have, AI art is a godsend.

[gingersnappish]

KYLUX RECS 2020-2021

My Kylux Recs in the last year (Aug, 20 2020 - Aug 20 2021)

SO. MUCH. GOOD. FIC!!! We are really lucky in this fandom to have so much good stuff to read!

Fic is part of the lifeblood of fandom, in my opinion-it shares new ideas and AUs and fleshes out the characters and most of all it inspires and entertains us all and engenders all sorts of feels for the characters-it’s part of what keeps us shipping! So a big ‘thank you’ to all the fic authors out there who work so hard at their craft and are generous enough to share it with all of us!

The following list is by no means comprehensive-there are LOTS and lots more very good fics that have been published in the last year that I haven’t read. I just wanted to offer up a few recs from what I know I enjoyed so far! (I also have more than fits on one list to rec-I’ll try and do another list soon!) As always, I rec based on personal taste, and I highly encourage reading all the tags/warnings on any given work to make sure it’ll be to your taste! -

The Flirtation Of Flowers 

DaisyChainz

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29771553

Words: 5,917

Rating: Teen

Summary:Kylo runs his farm's stall at the Farmer's Market every weekend. He has a new customer, a gorgeous redhead that is curious about the meanings of his bouquets. Kylo doesn't know anything about that, so he makes stuff up to keep the man coming back every week.

My thoughts on the rec: This is the cutest slice of a modern AU kylux-it really nails Kylo’s personality as a (slightly awkward) flirt who is trying his best and just really likes the redhead who keeps coming to buy flowers. Just a sweet little fic all ‘round!

all i have to do is dream

kyluxtrashcompactor

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18709426/chapters/44373613

Words: 11,456

Rating: Teen

Summary:Armitage Hux has been going to the same bar every Thursday for the last year, nursing a crush on the gorgeous, unobtainable bartender, Kylo Ren. He finally gets up the courage to ask him out, only to find out he has some unusual competition: the memory of a red-haired boy from Kylo's past, who Kylo swears is the soulmate that got away from him.A fill for this SoftKyluxKinks prompt:Anonymous asked: Benarmie with young Ben (around 11 years old) having a huge crush on Armitage (16). Hux finds it adorable but mostly ignores him because he's a kid. Flash forward a few years when Ben is all grown up and Hux is the one with a huge crush.

My thoughts on the rec: This is another really cute young modern AU! I like the idea that Ren has liked Hux forever, but this deals nicely with the age gap and that Hux really wouldn’t notice Ren back until they are both appropriately older. And they make such a cute couple-it’s a great progression from just ‘he’s hot’-like, there is a lot more to them than that in the end!

Homecoming 

sigo 

(really, read anything by sigo, it’s all my favorite)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27150808

Words: 13,450

Rating: Explicit

Summary:“We’re off the next two weeks, you know.”“Yes, I know.” There was emergency construction scheduled to fix cracking asphalt too near a pipe in the center of campus. The buses couldn’t run, and that phenomenon was the only thing that ever cancelled classes. Halloween was dead center in the unplanned time off school, and every bar within a fifteen mile radius would be untenable as the students celebrated. Hux was planning on staying home, catching up on grading. He was rather looking forward to an opportunity to reread his favorite novels. They were already stacked by the couch in preparation.“My family always throws a Halloween party and they got word that I could come this year,” Kylo said, shuffling his feet. He looked almost bashful.“Ren, it’s midnight,” Hux sighed at his infuriating coworker. “Get to it.”“I may have informed my entire family previously that we were dating.”

My thoughts on the rec: One of my all-around fav fics from the last year’s worth of my reading material! It’s got the modern AU vibes down pat without losing their personalities or making them too OOC, it’s got the fake-dating trope done REALLY well, it’s got a wonderful creepy vibe strung delicately throughout for the Halloween haunted setting, it’s got plot and make-outs (and more). Can’t recommend highly enough!

Thaw

thesevioletdelights

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28557180/chapters/69982587

Words: 14,316

Rating: Explicit

Summary:They have managed cooperation - efficient cooperation, even - in these past months, which is more than enough. And already nothing short of a miracle for both of them.Still. Ren was a fool to think he could simply run off and keep Hux in the dark.-----When Ren goes missing on a mysterious planet, Hux sets out to find him. He doesn't yet know that he just might find himself.

My thoughts on the rec: This, like all of violet’s fic, is HOT! Like, scorching vibes between them! It’ll draw you in and not let you go ‘til after the boys are ‘done’! And, like all of violet’s fics, the character voices and personalities are also impeccable!

Rocks Break Gifts

elderbwrry

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25840237/chapters/62777839

Words: 16,706

Rating: Mature

Summary:The Rebellion has been crushed, a coup affected, and Supreme Leader Ren and his Grand Marshall Hux have settled into a domestic routine as the joint rulers of the Galaxy. Kylo wants nothing more, now, than to make his relationship with Hux official, but he can't seem to rise to Hux's challenge of a satisfactory proposal.Or, the five times Kylo proposes, and the one time Hux says yes.

My thoughts on the rec: Ahhhhh, the premise in this one is great! Like, I don’t wanna spoil the plot reveal at the end, so I can’t say too much, but there is a really good reason throughout the thing that this is a Five Times type fic and it works! It works so well and while we spend the fic ‘with’ Kylo, when we find out what Hux’s deal is, it is so satisfying! I Paint My Dreams

Marlon

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26685907/chapters/65090566

Words: 26,122

Rating: General Audiences

Summary:Kylo Ren is struggling to make a name for himself in the art world but as the grandson of the great Anakin Skywalker, a legendary pop artist of the 1950s and 60s, the weight of his famous family and his own expectations is a lot to bear.After he’s rejected from a prestigious exhibition because his installations “don’t fit the theme”, Kylo heads to the pub to drink away his disappointment. Later that night as he stumbles home, he’s set upon by some would-be thieves but before they can take what’s left of his money, he’s saved by a strange man with unbelievable Medusa-like powers. The ethereally beautiful man, Armitage Hux, is a visitor from Oweynagat and he has a simple proposition for Kylo - room and board in exchange for making all Kylo’s artistic dreams come true.Sounds easy - what could possibly go wrong?

My thoughts on the rec: Oh goodness, where to start? The Irish Mythology and Fae aspect of this fic is superbly woven throughout the whole thing and the author makes it work really well! Like, this is such a unique and original take on the kylux pair, I love them, especially Fae!Hux in this! And the plot is solid and you get invested really heavily in how they are gonna wind up-at least I did! There’s some beautiful language in this-descriptions and dialogue! And I have a soft spot for Artist!Kylo!

Dating a Monster

mysticmilks

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26703904/chapters/65139415

Words: 30,401

Rating: Explicit

Summary:Ben Solo was raised to be a demon hunter, as everyone in his family has been before him. He wanted nothing more than to prove that he was worthy to his family. He lied to them and went on an unauthorized mission to catch and kill an elusive incubus. His search led him to Arkanis University, one of the most prestigious schools in the country.He was sure the mission was going to be easy, before he met the cute freshman Armitage Hux. This meeting would change the fate of both of them.

My thoughts on the rec: Add another really good one to the slightly-creepy-kylux subgenre filled with demons and dark powers! This is a great depiction of Kylo as a very determined demon hunter and Hux as a very unique quarry! I love the tension in parts of this too-well crafted! The Green Ribbon

xzombiexkittenx, Lilander (art)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28630845/chapters/70176921

Words: 39,679

Rating: Explicit

Summary:When Ben was fifteen he left the Jedi temple and took extreme measures to prevent the shadowy creature that infiltrated his thoughts from dragging him to the dark side. What he did left him with a great deal of chronic pain and removed his most valuable weapon, but Ben got his stubbornness from every side of the family, even the adopted ones, and he was determined to find and kill the creature.Now Senator Amidala of Naboo, Ben uses his position to make the galaxy a less awful place when he can, but being senator also gave him very useful contacts in his search for the creature. When he met Major Hux of the First Order, Ben thought he could get game-changing information out of him, one way or another, but things rarely go Ben's way and it got complicated much faster than Ben had prepared for. It's never a good idea to mix sex and politics, but Ben takes his fun where he can get it.

My thoughts on the rec: I feel like this is a very original take on ‘Senator Amidala’ Ben, at least from the stuff I’ve read-many props to the author for such a fleshed out universe, filled with likeable, believable OCs, a wonderful plot, great character motivations and voices, and a take on our main man Ben that pulled me in from the get-go! He’s sorta magnetic (in universe and to the reader)! And the sexual tension and sexy bits are very well done! I’m rooting for Ben and Hux in this, on opposites sides though they may be! Comfort Zone

LydiaBSlade

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26783797/chapters/65338117

Words: 66,766

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Hux is running away. He meets a tall, dark, and somewhat annoying stranger at the airport.

My thoughts on the rec: Travel writing at its best; also kylux fic at it’s best! Young, modern them trying to find their places in the world and finding each other in the process is so cute and almost tenderly done in this! This is a gentle, friendly version of modern Kylo that I fell in love with, right along with Hux! And by the way, I’m not kidding when I say travel writing-the southeast asian setting is vivid and enchanting in it’s rich detail! Outnumbered, Outgunned, Outmanuevered, and Winning

Coriesocks, Ellalba (art)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28217253/chapters/69144672

Words: 80,372

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Hux’s plans for ridding the First Order of Kylo Ren are ruined when Ren discovers his deception. With no choice but to flee, Hux ends up in the hands of the Resistance. It’s not ideal, but at least he gets a break from Ren. Until he doesn’t.When Ren starts appearing in Hux’s dreams, Hux wonders if the stress of being a spy has taken more of a toll on his sanity than he’d previously thought. And if that wasn’t bad enough, he has to deal with constant pestering from Poe and a mildly inconvenient kidnapping. Of course, it’s Ren who saves him in the end. There’s clearly no getting away from him.

My thoughts on the rec: A really interesting take on something that is both a alternate rewrite of what could have happened instead of TROS and a TROS-fix-it of sorts! Hux is stellar in this, we really get a good look in his head and Coriesocks handles it masterfully! I really liked how their relationship develops gradually in this, it’s Enemies To Lovers at its best! Bloodlines and Brandy

EmperorsVornskr

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22989934/chapters/54963601

Words: 130,785

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Sebastian Hux is a native of the Deep South who loathes his origins, and seeks to pull himself from the stifling quagmire, but his bloodlines call him back to the property that has blessed- and plagued- his family for centuries.Unspoken secrets fill his inheritance, skeletons fill every closet, and a monster lurks in the shadows, tied to two bloodlines joined by fate, greed and hatred that has spanned across generations.As Hux learns about his family’s tainted legacy that has now become his burden, he discovers there is more involved than just having to be the curator of property that the locals shun with hushed whispers, that he has inherited more than an estate- he also has a terrible and loathsome horror tied to his very blood.When curious young locals come calling, and Hux’s past tormentors come out of the woodwork to simper and scrabble for a piece of the newly rich, the body count begins to rise, the smell of blood in the old slaughterhouse is getting harder to hide, and Hux realises that he will need to find a better way to pacify the hulking shadow that perches on his roof every night before his hometown’s tiny population is completely decimated.

My thoughts on the rec: This one is EPIC! Like, in length (which it needs every word of for the story that is going on here) and in the great portrayal of Kylo and Hux and their relationship! It’s super original too-not just the plot but the depiction of Kylo as something ‘other’ and the Southern Gothic vibes, and Hux-this is a wonderful take on Hux! He loses none of his edge, in my opinion and yet the reader is ‘with’ him all the way through, rooting for him! The descriptions are killer too-EmperorsVornskr has a felicity of expression that kept me reading (albeit in more than one sitting). Also worth noting that this is a wonderful and carefully handled depiction of trans!Hux, in my admittedly cis opinion. The theme of finding your tribe/your people/and your special someone in this, albeit in sometimes unexpected places is warming! I enjoyed every moment of this fic! Gravity Well

kyluxtrashcompactor

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13062495/chapters/29879001

Words: 176,421

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Snoke is gone, but his death has solved nothing between Hux and Kylo Ren. The First Order's trust in their leaders wanes as they vie for power over one another, and if they cannot learn to work together, they may both lose everything they've worked for.Forging that alliance after years at each other's throats will not be as easy as letting the past die, however—they will face subterfuge, enemies in the shadows, treachery, and being stranded on a hostile planet with creatures out of nightmare, barely escaping constant danger with their lives while having only one another to rely on.And that is just the beginning.

My thoughts on the rec: I realize this one is very well known by now, but I’ll rec it again for good reason! It’s quality long-fic! I love how competent Hux is in this surival-style fic, even without the Force to save him! And Kylo is a badass! kyluxtrashcompactor is a master of the slow burn here and we’re even lucky enough to be getting a sequel (although Gravity Well will also stand perfectly on its own). The writing in this will draw you in and not let you go!

----

That’s all for now! I hope you enjoy reading these as much as I did!  

[dweemeister]

Mad Monster Party? (1967)

You may not be aware of who Rankin/Bass are, but if you have seen a Christmas television special in the last half-century, chances are you have seen one of their works. In an increasingly fragmented popular culture, those Christmas specials remain touchstones. Among those specials from animation director-producers Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass are Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964), Frosty the Snowman (1969), Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town (1970), The Year Without a Santa Claus (1974). Primarily known for their stop-motion animation television specials, Rankin/Bass also made theatrical films at the height of their popularity. Their third feature film, despite not being released in mind for Halloween, extended the studio’s stop-motion wizardry for the first time to all things spine-tingling and spooky.

Distributed by Embassy Pictures, Mad Monster Party? is a bizarre comedy that will delight the youngest set (frankly, I have never encountered a Rankin/Bass production that wasn’t bizarre), perhaps introducing some of them to the most famous monsters in film and literature. For Rankin/Bass’ older fans (or those not acquainted with their work), this film is one of their most ambitious projects; but it is underseen, rarely televised or programmed by independent movie theaters.

Residing in a castle on the Isle of Evil is Baron Boris von Frankenstein (voiced by Boris Karloff in his final Frankenstein-related work), who also cohabits the castle with his Monster (Alan Swift, who voices all other non-female characters in the film), the Monster’s more intelligent mate (Phyllis Diller), assistant Francesca (Gale Garnett; whose character might be the most buxom Rankin/Bass character ever), and the head zombie butler Yetch (who looks and, thanks to Swift, sounds like Peter Lorre). Baron Frankenstein has just successfully concocted a formula that can destroy any matter and, as the head of the Worldwide Organization of Monsters, wishes to announce his discovery and his retirement from the organization. A who’s who of monsters receive summons: Count Dracula, the Mummy, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, the Werewolf, the Invisible Man, Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde, and “The Creature” (the Creature from the Black Lagoon). Francesca notices there is one name on the list who is not a member of the organization – a pharmacist named Felix Flanken (Swift impersonating James Stewart). There has been no mistake, assures the Baron, because Felix is his intended successor. Francesca, who wanted the Baron’s position, is upset and plots to disrupt the succession. But when Felix arrives late to the mad monster party, Francesca is surprised to find that the heir apparent is inept, asthmatic, astigmatic.

Due to the filmmakers not wishing to pay royalties, some of the monsters that appear are called alternate names, even though each one is recognizable. Occasionally, Frankenstein’s monster is referred to as “Fang” (a reference to Phyllis Diller’s comedy acts, as she referred to her husband by this name during those acts); the Bride of Frankenstein becomes “The Monster’s Mate”; the Creature from the Black Lagoon is simply the “Creature”; a well-known monster that will go unnamed here due to spoilers is “It”; et cetera.

The screenplay by Len Korobkin and Harvey Kurtzman (a writer for and the founding editor of Mad magazine) contains plenty of comedic padding. Thus, Mad Monster Party? feels like an hourlong Rankin/Bass special that cannot justify its additional half-hour. Not that I minded too much in this case, despite the redundant character introductions and overlong slapstick scenes. Felix’s cluelessness onboard the ship ferrying the Baron’s guests to the Isle of Evil is situational hilarity. The variety of characters attending Baron Frankenstein’s gathering provides plenty of opportunities for them to interact with each other as a collection of dysfunctional colleagues. Their factionalism and widespread distrust between each other result in scheming and dry one-liners (including double entendres!) that complement the signature surreal humor of Rankin/Bass productions.

In a decade where monsters were having a resurgence in American popular culture (capped off by Scooby-Doo, Where Are You!), the relationships between the monsters in Mad Monster Party? feel influenced by earlier television series like The Addams Family (1964-1966) and The Munsters (1964-1966). Other influences and references will pass over the heads of most under a certain age; behaviors such as slapping a hysterical woman to make her come to her senses is deeply rooted in outdated ‘60s behavioral norms. Mad Monster Party? is funnier if one understands that there are stand-ins for certain actors: Baron Frankenstein resembles and is voiced by Karloff, Felix sounds like and acts like a Jimmy Stewart character from every romantic comedy he starred in, Yetch is obviously Peter Lorre, and the Monster’s Mate looks like and acts like Phyllis Diller. The band that plays at Baron Frankenstein’s dinner party seems to be a parody of the Rolling Stones. Though these decisions may need explaining to younger viewers and draw out the film’s runtime, the film’s comedy is just as weird as anything Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer offers. This is especially true in the final third of the film, defined by an out-of-left-field romance and an uninvited guest that wreaks havoc. These scenes give Rudolph’s “elf practice”, the reindeer’s interactions with each other, the Woodsman, and the Island of Misfit Toys a run for their money.

For almost all of Rankin/Bass’ television and film productions, the animation was entirely outsourced overseas. Such was the case for Mad Monster Party?. Using Rankin/Bass’ “Animagic” process, the film’s animation was spearheaded in Tokyo by Tadahito Mochinaga (Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, 1965’s The Daydreamer) of MOM Productions. In tandem with the character designs sketched by Jack Davis (an original artist for Mad magazine), the Japanese animators under Mochinaga meticulously moved the six-to-eight-inch puppets frame-by-frame – building open the advances pioneered by George Pal’s Puppetoons series of short films (1934-1947). The dolls’ realistic motions (or at least as realistic as such motion can be) were accomplished by using live actors standing nearby as reference. Mouth movements during dialogue was expressed using fine Japanese paper pasted for one frame and removed for the next. Each doll cost about $5,000 (just over $40,000 in 2020’s USD) to make and the animation itself was time-consuming.The production design for Mad Monster Party? represents some of the art direction in any stop-motion Rankin/Bass piece – especially the moody, cobweb-filled interior of the Baron’s castle.

Interspersed across Mad Monster Party? are several songs composed by Maury Laws (1964’s Return to Oz, The Year Without a Santa Claus) and lyrics by Jules Bass. Like almost all songs from Rankin/Bass pieces, the songs are not well-integrated into the story, but it is nevertheless difficult to imagine skipping any of them. The songs – though a vast majority are novelty songs – provide a bolt of energy where dialogue may have been trite. “Do the Mummy” by Little Tibia and the Fibias (reportedly real-life band Dyke and the Blazers) has absolutely zero lyrical interest along with its funk rock keyboard melody – but hey, we get the puppets to dance! “One Step Ahead” is just as repetitive, but arrives with the added benefit of Karloff speak-singing his parts (and who doesn’t want more Boris Karloff?). Phyllis Diller gets a solo number as the Monster’s Mate in “You’re Different” – a number to chastise Frankenstein’s Monster for his “roving eye[s]”.

But there are two songs by Laws and Bass in a different league than the rest. The first is the title song, “Mad Monster Party”, sung by jazz singer Ethel Ennis. On my first viewing of Mad Monster Party?, I never expected an opening tune as badass as this – replete with blaring brass, stabs of percussion, and string flourishes. It sounds like it was composed by John Barry for a James Bond movie; it makes a lyric like, “Did you sell your soul to Mephistopheles?” not feel awkward. “Mad Monster Party” is a snarling, unorthodox accompaniment to the monsters’ initial introductions over the opening credits – and the most pleasant surprise of the film. Almost as brilliant is a song for Francesca, with Gale Garnett singing the ballad “Never Was a Love Like Mine”. If only the context for that song (which I will not reveal to those who haven’t seen the film) was not so peculiar.

Upon viewing the final cut of Mad Monster Party?, executive producer and Embassy Pictures founder Joseph E. Levine expressed his disappointment in the picture and decided to limit the film’s theatrical release. The half-aborted theatrical release destined Mad Monster Party? to Rankin/Bass obscurity, even though it would be carried by select American television stations as a holiday special. The studio would remain focused on Christmas material, but would infrequently dabble in non-Yuletide projects. In 1972, Rankin/Bass directed a cel-animated television movie entitled Mad Mad Mad Monsters. The film is a “prequel of sorts” and includes many of the characters from Mad Monster Party?. To this day, Mad Monster Party? exists in the shadow of the better-known Christmas television specials. It also does not help that, since Rankin/Bass’ ultimate dissolution in 2001, the studio’s theatrical feature films have been separated from the rest of the Rankin/Bass library (pre-1974 specials are owned by Universal; specials from 1974 and after are owned by Warner Bros.). At the time of this review’s publication, Lionsgate holds the rights to Mad Monster Party?.

For a time, Rankin/Bass’ stop-motion animation films and television specials were popular in North America – their projects standing out from an animation industry beholden to cel animation perfected by Disney. Mad Monster Party? is Rankin/Bass craftsmanship (and lunacy) at a feature length, and necessary viewing for students of stop-motion animation. The film plays on the horror archetypes that audiences are now accustomed to, amid some of the most beautifully-designed sets in the studio’s history. It is an ideal Halloween viewing experience, but unfortunately it does not seem it has ever reached the audience that it deserves.

My rating: 6.5/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. Half-points are always rounded down. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found in the “Ratings system” page on my blog (as of July 1, 2020, tumblr is not permitting certain posts with links to appear on tag pages, so I cannot provide the URL).

For more of my reviews tagged “My Movie Odyssey”, check out the tag of the same name on my blog.

[aion-rsa]

Star Wars: 12 Snoke Facts You Might Not Know

https://ift.tt/2Tc5xc4

Set up in the first half of the Sequel Trilogy as a powerful new Star Wars villain, Supreme Leader Snoke of the First Order turned out to be something else entirely. Despite fulfilling the role of Emperor Palpatine in The Force Awakens, he’s completely off the table by the end of The Last Jedi. And in The Rise of Skywalker, the galaxy is only big enough for one galaxy-conquering villain as Kylo Ren’s fall shows.

By the end of the trilogy, Snoke is revealed to have been a bio-engineered villain all along, Force-puppeted tool Emperor Palpatine used to regain his grip on the galaxy while hiding his weakened physical form on the Sith planet of Exegol. His triumphs no longer truly his own, Snoke’s ultimate legacy is the rise of Kylo Ren as well as legendary motion capture actor Andy Serkis’ performance. 

As we look back at Snoke’s short tenure as the big bad of Star Wars, here are some facts you might not know about Supreme Leader Snoke: 

1. Snoke Was a Strand-Cast Created by Palpatine

Emperor Palpatine created Snoke to be his proxy through which he could regain his power. Although Snoke was bio-engineered in a lab on Exegol, he was a strand-cast, not a clone. This bit of Star Wars jargon means Snoke isn’t an exact copy of anyone, but isn’t natural-born either. We’ve heard the term “strand-cast” before. In The Mandalorian, Kuill speculates that Grogu might be a strand-cast — a speculation which turned out to be wrong when Ahsoka revealed Grogu grew up in the Jedi Temple. 

Palpatine’s ultimate plan was to use Snoke as his voice to whisper in Kylo Ren’s ear. It was one of several ways he was working behind the scenes all along to build the First Order — itself just a shell for the new Empire being built on Exegol. With his own clone body decrepit but his spirit still strong in the Force, Palpatine could possess other people but was looking for a permanent new vessel. 

Stream your Star Wars favorites right here!

Snoke was likely born from these experiments but was too imperfect a vessel to house Palpatine’s spirit. There were other candidates, like the strand-cast who became Rey’s father. But since the process that created strand-casts could not reliably replicate Force-sensitivity, Palpatine’s “son” was not Force sensitive. It was another dead end. The Sith lord next turned his attention to Rey in The Rise of Skywalker.

This strand-cast/cloning storyline shares several plot points with the classic Dark Empire comic series, where Palpatine bided his time until he could come back in a younger, stronger clone body and re-create the Empire.

2. Snoke Wasn’t Aware of His Own History

Unlike Palpatine’s strand-cast “son,” Snoke didn’t know he was created in a lab by the Sith lord nor that he was being manipulated to rebuild the Emperor’s forces. In fact, despite being created some time after the Battle of Endor, he believed to have lived through the rise and fall of the Empire.

All of this is revealed in the novelization of The Force Awakens, in a twist that might actually have been a result of The Rise of Skywalker not having been written or planned out yet. But his status as a Sith sleeper agent fits with Palpatine’s plan, too. Snoke truly believing that he himself was really a dark Force user who had lived through the Galactic Civil War likely prevented Ben Solo/Kylo Ren from sensing the deception throughout his time as Snoke’s apprentice. Palpatine needed Snoke to believe the lies he told Kylo Ren so that he could more easily manipulate the fallen Skywalker.

3. Hugh Hefner and Snoke’s Injuries Informed How Serkis Played the Character 

Andy Serkis rose to fame as the motion capture performer behind Gollum’s creepy mannerisms in The Lord of the Rings, quickly becoming well-known for injecting unique life and personality into monstrous characters. For Supreme Leader Snoke, Serkis drew from “the gold-lamé Hugh Hefner look,” the shining robe evoking the Playboy magazine founder. Serkis says he and The Last Jedi director Rian Johnson also considered drawing inspiration from “so many different dictators,” but settled on the uncanny Hefner idea. 

Snoke’s visual appearance was still being finalized when Serkis joined J.J. Abrams to work on the character for The Force Awakens. Therefore, the actor developed his ideas about the character at the same time as the artists were developing theirs. In The Last Jedi, Snoke finally appeared in the flesh as opposed to as a hologram, allowing Serkis to draw even more from the villain’s grotesque physical appearance. 

Serkis says he imagined Snoke’s deep scars were the source of some of his anger. “He’s terribly powerful, of course. But he is also a very vulnerable and wounded character,” Serkis told EW (via io9). “He has suffered and he has suffered injury. The way that his malevolence comes out is in reaction to that. His hatred of the Resistance is fueled by what’s happened to him personally.”

4. His Look Was Based on Classic Horror Movies 

According to the book The Art of The Force Awakens, “J.J. [Abrams] and [creature effects supervisor] Neal [Scanlan] didn’t want him to be old and decrepit, like the Emperor,” said senior sculptor Ivan Manzella, who sculpted a maquette of an elderly, bald face for Snoke. Early ideas made the difference even clearer by making Snoke a female character. 

The final result did look a lot like Palpatine, though: a hunched old man with a face distorted by deep wrinkles and scars. Manzella, who also made the final sculpt, says that Abrams wanted his look to evoke Hammer Films horror movies (such as classic takes on Frankenstein and Dracula). In particular Peter Cushing, who played Victor Frankeinstein and Abraham Van Helsing in several Hammer movies, was a direct inspiration. 

Manzella also added what he felt was a sense of beauty to the character: “I imagined him to be a beautiful marble sculpture, so dark and menacing, but actually quite beautiful to look at … It’s almost like Snoke was quite handsome when he was younger.”

The Frankenstein comparison is especially apt since Palpatine and his Sith cultists built Snoke themselves.

5. Snoke Is Not a Sith Lord 

You may have noticed that Snoke does not have the “Darth” title like the Dark Lords of the Sith do. He was never given one because he isn’t technically a Sith Lord. But the fact that he’s a bio-engineered being created by Palpatine explains why his training of Kylo Ren followed the Sith mold so closely, since all along Palpatine was trying to manipulate Ren.

During the time of The Force Awakens, many fans theorized that the next film would reveal Snoke to be Darth Plagueis, the Sith master who taught Palpatine the ways of the dark side. Plagueis was interested in extending one’s lifespan through the use of the dark side, so an old man with mysterious origins could very well have been him. This theory didn’t pan out. 

6. Rian Johnson Felt Snoke’s Presence Distracted From Rey and Kylo Ren’s Stories

The fan theories didn’t line up with what The Last Jedi director Rian Johnson had in mind for moving the Sequel Trilogy cast into the future. In a conversation with EW (via Collider) Johnson explained his reasoning for knocking Snoke off the Sequel Trilogy’s chessboard.

“When I was working on the character of Kylo, I came to a place where I thought the most interesting thing would be to knock the shaky foundation out from under him at the beginning of this movie…By the end of this film, he’s gone from being a wannabe Vader to someone who is standing on his own feet as a complex villain taking the reins.”

But if Kylo took the reins, where would this leave Snoke?

“That made me realize the most interesting thing would be to eliminate that dynamic between the ‘emperor’ and pupil, so that all bets are off going into the next one. That also led to the possibility of this dramatic turn in the middle, which could also be a really powerful connection point between Kylo and Rey.”

Instead of focusing on Snoke’s history, Johnson found Kylo Ren’s ongoing story more relevant and felt killing Snoke was necessary to push his former apprentice’s arc forward.

7. Snoke Chose Ben Solo Because of His Skywalker Blood

Speaking of the Sith, Snoke may not be one, but he is interested in the lineage of one of the strongest Sith of all time. He chose to corrupt Ben Solo specifically because he was the grandson of Darth Vader. Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa were perhaps too ingrained in the light side and too dedicated to the cause of the New Republic for Snoke to manipulate them, but the mercurial and directionless Solo was the perfect target. Using Ben’s obsession with Darth Vader to turn him further to the dark side was a relatively easy task for Snoke.

In the comic series The Rise of Kylo Ren, we learned how Snoke began reaching out to Ben from an early age– and another comic, Age of Resistance: Supreme Leader Snoke, also fills in some of Snoke and Ben’s history. Before the events of The Force Awakens, Snoke spent a lot of time planting seeds of distrust between Ben and his uncle and teacher Luke Skywalker from afar, all while biding his time on a space station with an expansive garden, where Ben flees for guidance after the destruction of the Jedi academy. 

Read more

Movies

10 Best Star Wars Villains Ranked

By Megan Crouse

Movies

Star Wars: 15 Palpatine Facts You Might Not Know

By Megan Crouse

Some time after this, Snoke took Kylo Ren to the Force cave on Dagobah from The Empire Strikes Back to experience a vision. There, Kylo kills an illusory Luke, but stops short of killing his parents. But Snoke encourages him to use his anger, fear, and other emotions associated with the dark side to complete his training.

The visual dictionary for The Rise of Skywalker shows how deep Palpatine’s plan went. It says Palpatine intended killing Snoke to be the mark of Kylo Ren’s full descent into the dark side and rise into Sith-hood. Snoke’s death was in a way a symbolic killing of a Sith master — it’s traditional for the apprentice to kill the Master — while Palpatine himself remained alive and well to take over as Kylo’s new master. A final, decisive victory over the Skywalker bloodline.

8. Snoke Trained At Least One Other Apprentice Before Kylo Ren

According to the The Force Awakens Visual Dictionary, Snoke canonically trained someone else before Ben. Little is known about this mystery apprentice. We don’t know the person’s name, when this took place, or how it connects to Palpatine’s overarching plans. The existence of this apprentice is implied by Snoke’s description of Kylo Ren as his most gifted apprentice, suggesting there must have been someone else to compare him to. 

In the Age of Resistance comic, Snoke also mentions that he plans to have more apprentices after Kylo Ren is gone. But Ren cuts that plan short in The Last Jedi.

9. Snoke Had At Least One Earlier Run-In With Luke

The facial scarring and collapsed cheek Serkis talked about might have been created by Luke Skywalker. In The Rise of Kylo Ren, Ben Solo alludes to “what Master Luke did to you.” But Snoke is more interested in Ben’s conflict with Luke. 

What happened between Snoke and Luke is still unknown. It’s possible that whatever confrontation led to Snoke’s scars was also the first time Ben met Snoke. 

10. Snoke Played a Key Role in the Empire’s Transformation into The First Order

Since Palpatine had to hide his weak clone body from everyone except his secret Sith acolytes, he placed Snoke in charge of the day-to-day growth of the First Order. Through his own lackeys, General Hux and Captain Phasma, Snoke spearheaded the new stormtrooper program that captured and indoctrinated children, building a military force powerful enough to go against the New Republic. And behind the veil of the Unknown Regions, an uncharted sector of the galaxy where the New Republic held no dominion, Snoke helped reorganize what was left of the Empire into the First Order, eventually becoming its Supreme Leader. 

Snoke’s Attendants, the purple-robed aliens seen briefly in The Last Jedi, are also part of this initiative. They are the ones who helped the Imperial remnant settle in the Unknown Regions, using their abilities to blaze hyperspace trails that made First Order conquest much more efficient.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

11. Snoke’s Flagship, The Supremacy, Is the Only Ship of Its Kind

Snoke’s flagship was ripped in half by “the Holdo maneuver” in The Last Jedi, a strong blow by the beleaguered Resistance. Along with being the site of Snoke’s throne room, the Supremacy also contained enough factories to produce entire fleets for the First Order.

In fact, it was the base of operations for the entire First Order, which did not have a capital planet but instead maintained their military superiority from space. Technically, the Supremacy was a Mega-class Star Destroyer and the only one of its kind ever made. 

12. Snoke’s Ring Contains a Relic From Darth Vader’s Castle

Snoke was a collector of Sith relics and secrets, traveling around the galaxy in search of knowledge, settling on his Force philosophy, and collecting things before he recruited Ben. It’s unclear how much of this Sith pilgrimage really happened versus the memories implanted by Palpatine, but it does appear that Snoke did actually discover the lost concept of a Force dyad, which he used to bring Rey and Kylo together.

He also discovered many dark side artifacts. One detail that’s easy to overlook in The Last Jedi is Snoke’s ring. The gaudy gold ring contains a hunk of black crystal. The Last Jedi Visual Dictionary defines this as obsidian from the catacombs beneath Darth Vader’s fortress on Mustafar. The ring also features “gold etched with glyph of the Dwartii.” In both canon and Legends, Dwartii is a planet which is home to several different schools of philosophers. 

The post Star Wars: 12 Snoke Facts You Might Not Know appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3BVdLGO

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep 25: Oh Hai Mai

Heyyy we’re back. Thank for bearing with me, it’s been kind of chaos over here. Everything from a pandemic (we are very sloooowly reopening over here but I’ve been quarantined so long I can french braid my damn leg hair.) to important political protests, to getting an evacuation order because an arsonist burned down 90 acres in the heat of summer (luckily we’re all fine), to a vole that ate everything in my pandemic self-care garden so I lost my entire mind and waged war and dug so many holes and put out 17 mouse traps and set off so many critter bombs under the ground trying to kill the little bastard like it was Caddyshack (It’s still alive, ps, I lost that war). These last 3 months have been the longest decades of my life. The only month longer was the one where I’m pretty sure I had mono and it made me positive that my basement was haunted.

Man, bring back my haunted basement, Sorry if this comes through in my writing, I tried but, I can’t edit it out. You get FML-Rachel today.

Lets get back to a good, mindless distraction, lets turn on Yugioh.

BUT------->it just so happens that this episode of Yugioh has cop stuff in it, I’m just going to be blunt. We’re going into Valon’s backstory, he’s very much a victim of problems within the bizarre Yugioh legal system, and much like a Gotham supervillain, he is a symptom of the problem more than the cause.

I’m not going to ignore that, but in case you are overwhelmed about that right now, if you want to like...save this for later--I have another FMA recap coming out soon that I wrote in a simpler time before....the corona freakin ruined us all.

Last we left off, we were on the heels of Joey Wheeler, who decided to book it down the street because he wants to murder the hell out of Valon.

Youknow...Joey is one hell of a protagonist. He just does...so MANY antagonistic things.

Joey has decided that although the world is ending, and everyone left alive will be absorbed into the Great Leviathon’s big yummy tummy, which can only be prevented by three people, of which he is one of--he’s going to go sprint in completely the other direction.

We even managed to get Kaiba on board. We were ready. We were done, but then Joey had to lose his freakin mind because that’s just what Joey Wheeler does sometimes.

Normally heroes avoid the call to duty because of a severe lack of self confidence, but this is Joey, and he’s going to avoid the call to duty because of too much self confidence.

And so Joey and his Chaperone turn a corner and walk into this random orc who’s just casually living his best life and touring SF.

One of my worst fears walking through SF, tbh. Running into high school people. Not so much the orcs.

Yo, I wonder what the bushman was doing through all of this? So IRL, we have this guy who just...hides in a bush and jump-scares tourists. I can’t imagine what it must be like to be in a bush and then just...all these orcs show up and you’re all.

...oh no, now I’m the fool...

I just want to know if bushman made it, or if he’s in a paper card that’s just a picture of foliage.

(read more under the cut)

Anyway, Joey was already in the process of running, so they just turned around on this street of...so much parking.

Like y’all there is SO MUCH PARKING this episode. I was trying to pay attention to anything else, but like...do you see this!? It takes nearly half an hour usually to get a spot but this--this right here?

And the crazy thing is, recently my bro had to go pick up some old guy from a cruise that...got quarantined...and so bro had to go the Pier and like--this is what the city looked like. This is a pandemic, it’s just lots of parking, so I want to criticize Yugioh, and I normally would, but I can’t. I’ve seen the receipts. They called it. This is what the endtimes look like and it’s so much parking.

Also, they were too lazy to draw cars but damn, they called it.

So, left with no other option, Joey decides to...be Joey, and punches a huge orc covered in armor.

So Valon’s here, because apparently SF has just...no one left alive in it except for these few kids and that one Uber Eats driver. I imagine it’s a lot easier to find Joey if you just follow the only one screaming in Japanese in a Brooklyn accent at the top of his lungs.

And Valon decides that this one way street isn’t good enough, and that they must duel somewhere else.

I assumed it would be a tall structure, but considering Kaiba just blew up the tallest structures in the Financial District...I was like...what else is tall? And bear in mind, I’m a mess, so I was like...OMG I wish it were Macy’s!!!

Now I hear you saying that’s weird, and we shouldn’t have a very fancy Macy’s in 2020, and you’re correct. but we still have one, and the top floor is just...a massive Cheesecake factory, and I can’t think of anything more 00′s than a Yugioh duel on top of that specific Cheesecake Factory.

And I’ve never really thought before about where the best Yugioh duel would be, and it’s there. It’s at the high rise Cheesecake. Listen Yugioh, if you need an insider to choose locations for your Netflix remake of S4--call me.

So anyways, instead of doing the right thing and going to the Cheesecake Factory on top of Macy’s like any other self respecting 00′s teenager, Valon and Joey are going to drive through the most boring parts of town.

They had an opportunity to go chase eachother through any tourist attraction, Lombard street, Ghirardelli Square, the Palace of Fine Arts, China town, reuse some assets and drive through Japan town, that fountain that looks like Yoda--but no...they decided to drive through literal trash.

Just...a missed opportunity, and it should have been a Cheesecake Factory.

Also, I totally and fully acknowledge that a strange nostalgic affection for the Cheesecake Factory is a weird Millennial thing (much like our weird encyclopedic knowledge of Sailor Moon) but listen. You have your thing, too. You go do you, I’m gonna soak my sorrows in a bowl of Chinese chicken salad so wide, it’ll last me 3 days.

Anyways, Joey’s gonna steal that guy’s bike.

Yugioh just predicting the future in 2003. We actually have a HUGE problem right now with vehicle theft in the city to an almost comedic degree, which is partly why the parking situation has gotten so incredibly dire. It’s kind of incredible that this guy left his bike out because after about 1 day in the city you learn pretty fast that you need to be constantly checking on your street parked vehicle--I mean, that guy was just asking for it, honestly. If Joey hadn’t taken it, some other guy would have absolutely taken it, (even that orc would’ve taken it, the city has no consideration for cars.)

Sorry --one sec-- that was an earthquake just now. As I’m typing this. Just a little guy. Just a little treat for me...

...but still like...c’mon. I’m also getting this weird issue where Tumblr doesn’t save my drafts so like...this is like the 3rd time I’ve had to write this like...I just want to make a Yugioh post for my tiny funtime tv blog, Universe. Don’t @ me right now, Universe.

SO MUCH FREAKIN PARKING.

...is it the space between two piers? What is this? We don’t have rivers in SF, it is a peninsula covered in very steep hills. Like very VERY steep hills. All water just rolls into the ocean and there’s a couple of lake thingies but...no rivers that I know of (And like maybe this is a thing, and I just haven’t seen it? Learn something new every day.)

*loud, audible sigh* home. Where we belong. At the warehousssssssse.

Back at the RV base, Duke Devlin is still babysitting. Maybe this is to make up for the two seasons he spent trying to date a girl Rebecca’s age, that they felt like going out of their way to show that he has indeed no longer horny now. Got to hand it to them, that’s a lot of character development right there. Although at the same time, it has made Duke Devlin a very non-character.

But imagine how insanely complicated would it have been if Duke got involved in that bizarre love-square that is Yugi, Tea, and the Ghost that killed Yugi by accident.

PS that’s either a freeway onramp (which is too far South from where they were, I think) or it sure does look like old Embarcadero behind them. Youknow, that lifted street from the 80′s that fell down in Loma Prieta and was never rebuilt? I just freakin love that it’s still here in 2003. This bizarre Yugioh alternate California.

Anyway, because this is alternate California, Seto set a massive fire and the entire city didn’t immediately go up in flames. Apparently they just kinda ran away from the explosion and damage before anyone noticed.

Probably because most people on Earth are dead anyway, so what more can these two actually do?

And so Yami ends up getting lectured by the wife.

And justifiably, the wife seems to have absolutely no confidence that Yami will be able to do a damn thing right.

Wifes all around this episode.

Speaking of,

At this point, Arthur Hawkins senses that Yami’s nearby, so he opens the door just to freakin dump some guilt on him.

...Rebecca seems to be a character that’s mostly there to recap the lore and also to dump on Yami. I don’t mind that. Yami needs to get dunked more often, and I’m saying that in S4, where the entire season’s tagline is “how many times can we dunk on Yami?”

So lets check on Yugi, how’s that kid doing? It’s been quite a number of episodes since we last saw him.

Yep, still hanging out in the Han Solo cosplay room.

And then, because I guess everyone is just hanging out in the same 4 blocks, Mai and Tristan have a heart-to-heart.

In the show, this conversation was Mai (who is now a serial killer) saying “Oh hey, Tristan, where’s Joey?” and Tristan saying “It’s ALL YOUR FAULT he wants to kill Valon--thanks a lot, Mai! GODS!” all indignant like.

Not how you would ordinarily talk to a serial killer, just saying. No one from the Yugi crew fears this woman...at all...and she has killed over 20 people in front of them and is trying very hard to kill Joey Wheeler all the time.

Like what would it actually take for them to fear this woman? They can’t, right?

Meanwhile, Valon is trying to explain to Joey that his obsession with Mai is in fact damaging any relationship they could have had.

So then when you’re like OK...this is actually very valid points on Valon’s part, and Joey really does need to step back and let people make their mistakes considering Joey was barely a part of her life to begin with. But then, Valon just turns a 180 and...it becomes a catty love triangle where only one person in the triangle even feels romantic emotions.

I just...so Valon is doing this fight because he thinks Mai is in love with Joey.

This whole time I was like “well maybe it’s more that Valon is trying to defend Mai’s right to make her own choices” but no...he just straight up thinks Mai is in love with Joey. And, in fighting Joey, Valon himself is ignoring Mai’s life choices

Just a whole lot of misunderstanding that would have been fixed with better ways than dueling with cards. At least that one guy in S2 who tried to marry Mai actually dueled HER instead of some random guy.

It just really feels like these boys are having a pissing contest and Mai was never let in on the deets that this was even happening.

Mai needs to hang out with older men. Set her up with Roland, this is ridiculous.

Back at the RV, which got very, very big in this shot, Seto has an odd convo with Mokuba about how they are probably not going to get Kaiba Corp back. And then no one really argued with him about that.

He’s taking it really well. Maybe because this isn’t even the first time or the second time or even really the third time Seto’s lost everything. Kid’s really freakin great at failure. At least this time Mokuba isn’t currently abducted, which is really good improvement for these two.

Outside the RV, Tristan has decided to...give up as well, just right here, in the middle of traffic. Then he gets Orc’d...these orcs are kind of like Slenderman, in that they kinda...show up...but then that’s all they do because the designers didn’t actually want to animate anything.

And then this happens.

God bless this story boarder for this random series of events presented in just this way.

Also here’s yet another example where Tea just has...no fear. She’s actually only out here because she was like “that’s it, we’re getting another driver” and was going to chew out Duke Devlin. The Orc being in the middle of the road was not the reason she walked out here.

Anyways, Yami killed it because everyone here can just throw cards forever, these things are not threatening.

The subplot of everyone refusing to drive with Duke Devlin after he busted his car in Death Valley is still ongoing, and it’s still low key hilarious that no one will outright say “Duke, your driving is just so bad” and instead, Duke just has to sit there and watch Joey STEAL A MOTORCYCLE just so he won’t have to drive shotgun with Duke Devlin.

Rebecca, our plot-dump device, then informs us that Valon has Special Rules.

Because Valon, if you’ve forgotten, has a card that allows him to physically punch his opponent in the face.

They should have invented that card a long time ago TBH.

SO, lets get into Valons tragic backstory. First off, go turn on your Les Mis Soundtrack, because this is some old school cop stuff.

So apparently Valon, as a child just...stayed in the system forever. We don’t know why yet, but lets just assume that it’s tragic and heavy handed. If he steals a loaf of bread and ends up in 12 Juvies (which is a line from the show and not an exaggeration--12 Juvies) then I will expect him to be singing by the end of this and I will be very disappointed if he does not.

Anyways, he was such an asshole, that he caught the attention of some very illegal rich bastard who was trying to turn prisoners into...card murders. (it was Dartz.) because apparently...Dartz also funds prisons and that is...that is some deep lore.

And so probably about the same time that Yugi was Dueling to the death on Pegasus’ Island, and about the same time that Marik was hanging out in the ocean next to Pegasus’ Island with a pair of binoculars, and about the same time that Noah was underneath Pegasus’ Island just watching Pegasus steal KaibaCorp, Dartz decided to make his OWN murder island--because I guess he got jealous.

Anyway, Valon won, and didn’t even need to set anyone on fire.

Those little green things there--those are all souls of prison inmates.

YUGIOH.

Millennials got DARK, OK? Freakin...we had a show for 9 year olds that went deep into the school-to-prison pipeline and didn’t even try to hide it under any layers of symbolism. Like Hunger Games at least had two people survive.

This was a show to sell PAPER CARDS.

+++++++++++THIS IS A RANT WHERE I WENT OFF ABOUT PRISON TALK IN KID’S SHOWS FEEL FREE TO SKIP++++++++++++++++++++

Now, there’s a lot of good conversation going on right now about errors in the modern justice system on not just a local scale, but on a global scale, especially regarding racial profiling and criminalization of poor, sick, and young, and we better keep pushing it. But it’s surprising when people pretend like this hasn’t been talked about for a long time. Because...we’ve been talking about it in kids and YA shows for a long time. This is not something that just popped up in 2020.

Like millennials didn’t invent this obsession with dark and gritty stories with uncomfortable themes. It’s been around for thousands of years, but back in the 90′s and 00′s, a lot of shows for YA and younger enjoyed talking about the problems with prisons and abuse of power with our justice systems--a lot. Batman, X-men, Death Note, so so many, hell, even the OC.

And like, don’t get me wrong, we still have these shows running around, but I’ve been there’s been a trend of stories (not saying names) where just...nothing bad happens. And, that’s kind of sad because...they CAN have small elements that are more progressive in them, but only brought forth with a very risk-free cotton candy fluffy coating to make the majority of the population happy.

I could go long about this, and I’m getting very cryptic. If a kid escapes to more colorful worlds where nothing bad ever happens, that’s OK--sometimes you need that, but when nothing bad ever happens surrounding certain experiences where bad things normally happen--the meaning of the story changes because it isn’t a real experience anymore.

Like I don’t want to tangent too much, and I just had to delete a lot of examples, but I know a lot of people want to write stories about misrepresented minorities and about real deal serious situations and are just so afraid of misrepresentation that they go in completely the wrong direction by not putting in anything uncomfortable at all. I think it’s important to look at the work and ask yourself is this about the minority the work should be about--or is this work about patting the majority of the population on the back and saying neat, we’ve achieved utopia without having to even do anything?

...anyway, obvi I’m ranting, but I feel like we’re taking a step backwards when it comes to the importance of kids programming and that we do need to talk to kids about prison again. This is a show about paper cards, and they don’t do a great job at talking about...the reality of prison, this was exaggerated with genre stereotypes, but at least they didn’t cover it with rainbows and unicorns, because this isn’t about how great Joey and the “normal” people are at saving Valon, this is about how society screwed Valon beyond repair, and I am 99% certain we will see this guy’s soul stuffed in a brick above Dartz’ snake fireplace.

Like, yeah he duels to the death on an island, but that’s imagery that is very close to real life prison issues. We don’t talk to kids a lot about how a lot of inmates get enlisted into the military during war times (and quite literally...duel to their death...on islands). We don’t talk about how we use inmates to betray eachother for a chance at maybe getting amnesty. We don’t talk about how a lot of the victims of this system are essentially children, and have been caught in a system of endless prison for what will probably be the rest of their lives. We don’t talk about how we’re systematically turning kids into criminals so much in kid’s shows of late...and Freakin Yugioh just did in a filler season. 

....................I think our standard for modern kids programming to talk about serious issues is way too low if Yugioh just threw this out there in a filler season, is all I’m saying.

++++++++++++++++++END OF PRISON RANT++++++++++++++++++++++

 So, Valon is free but...is he?

Not really, he’s just gone from one jailer to another, but at least this time he gets his own room. Don’t blame him for latching onto Dartz’ dream to end the world, because the world for him has been one behind bars. He doesn’t know it. Never been there.

It’s just interesting juxtaposed to Joey because Joey had some sort of Season Zero history with a gang and I haven’t watched that episode yet.

So that’s it for now, again, I’m very slooow lately. I slept for 3 hours today...and I don’t know why. But hey--we all got through three (four???) months of this...we just gotta go...one month at a time.

That and I accidentally did my taxes early so there’s that. See? Good things still happen.

Also, because I only slightly referenced the most incredible movie ever made on San Fransisco soil, I’ll just leave this here. The true hallmark of our city.

Anyway you know the drill, here’s the link

[itsbap]

[INTERVIEW] KCrush Interview with Rapper and Songwriter Bang Yong-guk

As a Korean rapper, songwriter, and record producer, and former leader and main rapper of K-Pop group B.A.P, Bang Yong-guk has had a storied career, and he’s not even 30-years-old (born March 31, 1990)! In 2008, Yong-guk made his debut in the underground Hip-Hop group Soul Connection using the pseudonym “Jepp Blackman,” and since then, he’s become a popular figure in the Korean music scene, especially for international fans who enjoy his artistic flair and meaningful songs.

On August 19, 2018, Yong-guk’s contract with TS Entertainment ended, so he is now free to pursue his own music and projects. 2019 marks Yong-guk’s new beginnings as a soloist without the K-Pop chains.

On January 20, 2019, he made his solo comeback with the single, “Hikikomori,” his first comeback since “Drunkeness” back in May 25, 2018. We were lucky to be able to attain an interview from Bang Yong-guk, while awaiting his HIKIKOMORI single to be dropped on the 20th of January 2019.

*Thank you so much for taking time out for a KCrush Interview. Could you briefly introduce yourself to our readers please?

– Hello, this is Bang Yong-guk. It’s nice to meet you all.

*You have a new single is out on the 20th of January, tell us why did you choose “Hikikomori” as the title and the meaning behind the cover.

– Hikikomori is based on my own story which expresses the inner loneliness and confusion from my experience.

I tried to express the feelings I get when I look in the mirror and see my real self when I am off-stage, the fear I have towards the people in the outside world, and the disturbing feeling that I get from being confined in a room that seems like it is protecting me but, at times, it just feels like imprisonment. I put in the effort to put music, artwork, photography and video together. As to the artwork on the cover, I initially did the drawing and the design was developed on it.

*Your Instagram and MVs focus a lot on aesthetics and art, especially black and white images. Does art hold a lot of significance for you?

– I began using the black and white filter when uploading my photos and I continued using it.

At first, I selected the filter because I felt somewhat uncomfortable with the colorful photos seen on the social media. It really doesn’t hold any special meaning or significance, but I like the fact the black and white filter seemed to convey more colors for me personally. However, I think using black and white for other data other than my own photos may seem a bit too stubborn of me, so I am trying to use less these days. But I still like black and white.

*What kind of music are you into these days?

– Since I was working on my studio album, I didn’t get to listen much of other artists’ music other than my own. I usually enjoy listening to James Blake when I’m working. I tend to listen to the song, “Don’t Miss It” the most. James Blake is an artist who really inspires me and for that, I am very appreciative.

*It seems you’ve taken up tennis. Could we ask how good you are at playing the sport?

– I’m still a beginner. Tennis was a sport that I wanted to learn since I was young but I couldn’t make the time for it while I was active in the group.

When I left the company, tennis was the first thing I began learning. At the time, I thought to myself that I should do what I want to do when I first bought a tennis racket.

*You have a few noticeable tattoos; do they hold any particular meanings to you?

– I don’t necessarily enjoy getting myself tattooed but I have the tendency or just a weird habit of wanting to leave a trace on my body whenever I experience certain incidents.

I never got a tattoo thinking that they’d look cool on me or anything like that. When I made up my mind to get one done, I think that it was usually because I was out of control and they weren’t always done due to good memories.

*If you were a character of an anime or a video game, what would you be and why?

– That seems like a difficult one to answer. I’m just too ordinary to be like a character of any kind, and not a likely candidate to appear in an anime or a video game. If I ever thought of wanting to be one… Because I enjoy playing soccer video games, I’ve wanted to be one of the referees in a soccer video game, rather than the cool-looking soccer players.

*Which characteristics do you and your twin share and what are your differences?

– Well, I find it amusing that we have the same voice, height, and face but our personalities are completely the opposite. I like staying at home while my twin brother likes to go out and hang out with his friends.

*Will you be collaborating with any of your former group members in the future? And if you could collaborate with an American artist, who would it be?

– I always have in mind that I would be doing some great projects with the members in the future. The American artist I would like to collaborate with is Joji. Everything he has done is art.

*Do you have any movies, books or musicals that you’ve enjoyed recently?

– The Shape of Water.

*Do you have a preference to a color and what colors don’t you like?

– My wardrobe is just filled with black and white. I don’t think I like any colors that stand out in the crowd.

*What do you do to maintain your health and to release stress?

– My way of managing my health is not to pay much attention or care into it, but I would not recommend that.

I don’t know how to releasing stress, so I always keep it inside, and that’s how I am able to produce songs in the studio.

*What did you like the most about touring? How are the Babyz overseas different from the Korean Babyz?

– The tours that we’ve done have always been a joy for me. Whether it was on or off stage, they were the only times when I felt I could really breathe. And those times are filled with great memories for me. I do not think the fans outside of Korea are particularly different from Korean fans. I’m just so grateful that they love me and support what I do. I can feel they truly care about me.

*Who do you respect and feel the most grateful towards?

– My grandfather is whom I respect the most and the one I am the most thankful for. Although he is in heaven now, I still think he’s guiding me. My grandfather is practically a religion to me, and I love him.

*Please tell us about your future plans, goals and hopes for this year and beyond.

– I wish to begin this year by showcasing everything that I have to offer. My studio album is almost complete, so please show support.

I will also be doing new projects with friends who are artists to produce music, pictures, photographs, videos, fashion, designs, writing…

If any of you would like to participate, please contact me.

Now that I’m free, I think I will be able to do anything. Thank you.

Kcrush would like to thank Bang Yong-guk for his time and wish him much success with his single “Hikikomori” plus his upcoming album.

[softly-mossy]

rrrrRRAAAAAA i did it dudes. wrote about @trackinghallownest‘s vessel spindle getting a happy ending after some art they made about spindle getting all forgotten n whatnot. that would not Do for my big dumb soft baby heart.

[AO3]

The City of Tears may be a forlorn, desolate place inhabited by the husks and ghost of those that once lived there, but it was a peaceful place. The pattering rain on the window next to them was soothing, droplets spattering against the pane and trailing downwards in rivulets. 

Nudge, nudge.

Maybe if Hawk ignored the insistent pestering, Hum would take the hint. They close their eyes and act as if asleep.

Nudge! Nudge, nudge!

Keep pretending.

Pat, pat!

Just...keep the act up. Hum will stop soon. It feels mean to do, but Hawk is genuinely exhausted.

Hum stops, thankfully. Hawk actually relaxes.

SHOVE!

Hawk almost falls off the bench they’re resting on. Narrowed eyes glare down at Hum on the bench adjacent to them. What greets them is a sight familiar, somewhat annoying, but soul-wrenching nonetheless. 

Hum’s eyes are pleading for something. When they notice Hawk’s aware of their state, they stand fully on the bench and lay their little hands on Hawk’s shoulder.

Hawk tilts their head to show that they’re paying attention fully. Hum grabs one of Hawk’s hands and hops down off the bench,  tugging with all the might contained in their little form. As Hawk slowly rises, Hum eagerly points to a map pinned on a post nearby. Begrudgingly, Hawk allows their sibling to drag them over.

Hum’s hand indicates a spot on the map. Leaning in and peering closer, Hawk notices where they’re pointing to: the Abyss.

The Abyss? What’s there? Does Hum want to just go say hello to all our desolate siblings there...again?

The notion of Hum being so overwhelmingly worried about the well-being of the shade-siblings was touching, honestly. It fit Hum’s character perfectly. Hawk may not want to plod all the way back down to the Abyss to do this menial thing, but if Hum wanted to, that was all the importance Hawk needed. 

Hawk points to where they are currently, nestled in the City of Tears after a short, curt meetup with Lemm to get rid of some relics Hum had gathered. Hum follows suit, gently patting a hand on the map next to theirs. Hawk analyzes a track down to where Hum desired to go, weaving and turning as their hand mapped a path that their mind memorized.

Nothing too awful. They were already in the City near the King’s Station. A quick inquiry to the Stag Beetle could get them to the Hidden Station by the Palace Grounds, right next to their destination.

Hawk rolls their eyes. The things they did because Hum gave some baby eyes. Pathetic.

Hum wasn’t pathetic. Hum was caring and kind and gentle and bubbly. Hallownest could use more individuals like that.  Unfortunately, Hum’s size and stature limited things they could achieve solo, so a little “assistance” is needed. That’s why Hawk is so tolerant of the misadventures they are led on, or so they tell themselves. 

Hawk nods to show they’re ready to leave. Hum bounces on their toes in response. As Hawk turns and begins the stroll to the Stag Station, Hum’s hurried plip-pap-pip-plap footsteps can be heard trying to keep up. Hawk pauses, extending an arm out to the side and waiting. Hum catches up, latches onto the offered arm, and holds tight.

The King’s Station approaches soon enough. For once, Hum isn’t constantly derailing their task by meandering off to look at this, to touch that thing, to stomp in that puddle, to climb up onto some crate or box. No, they’ve got a single-minded intensity that Hawk finds themselves surprised by.

Skimming by the complementary bench that always accompanies a Stag, the duo approach a directions post and a bell. The post shows a primitive, basic map of Hallownest, other Stag Stations marked by little tokens. Hawk stoops over to pick Hum up. Hum goes willingly, already extending an arm towards the bell just waiting to be rung. Firmly, Hum smacks the bell with a clang-clang-clang and preens as Hawk sets them down gently. Shortly, the Last Stag’s thundering footfalls are audible, and grow steadily louder and louder. 

The Stag skids to a halt in his typical dramatic fashion, kicking up plumes of dust as he grunts. Hum is already scampering up to him, offering a hug that he accepts gratefully. Hawk watches passively and the embrace is exchanged. 

“Where to, my small friends?” his gruff voice asks.

Hawk points to a marker on the map post.

“The Hidden Station?” Hawk nods once; Hum nods furiously. “So be it! I shall get you there swiftly, as always.”

He kneels down and waits for the two of them to clamber onto his back. Hawk lifts Hum up into one of the seats attached to the Stag’s shell, climbing up after them after ensuring they were situated. Hawk sits right next to them, a spot where they could easily reach over to steady Hum if the ride got too bumpy.

And bumpy it was.

To be fair, the Stag had never been hailed for his smooth ride to a destination. No, he was prided on being quick and sure-footed, which he indeed was. Still, Hawk found their hand latching onto the rails of the seat one one side, and the other holding Hum firmly.

Hum, as usual, is having a blast, oblivious to the ragged look Hawk gains. Their scarf whips in the wind, tickling Hawk’s face occasionally. Hawk’s on adornment, the length of black cord wrapped around their neck comfortably in a mock-impression of Hum’s scarf, thankfully dances in the breeze behind their head.

Eventually the Last Stag barrels into the Hidden Station, and again, skids to a halt. He stands stock-still as they dismount into the Station.

“Take care, little friend!” The Last Stag grunts to Hum. With a nod towards Hawk, he continues. “Make sure to keep that companion in line. When you need me next, I shall be there.”

Hawk rolls their eyes. Hum beams, waving a final farewell to their Stag friend. Hawk turns and begins to walk further into the Ancient Basin, and Hum skitters up beside them. These parts of the Basin have no real threats within them, as the only other creatures near them were the meek Shadow Creepers, which kept to their own business. 

But there was the Palace Grounds.

Hawk knew of what went on within this area. The Pale King. The Siblings. The failed vessels, all pitched over the edge into the Abyss like unwanted discards. It infuriated them. Hawk was one of those vessels. Discarded for being too stubborn. Too expressive. Too protective. That’s where they met Hum a while later. It hurt to think about. Their own discardment was upsetting, sure; but the fact that one like Hum was thrown aside in the same manner was infuriating.

Shuffling past the lifeless Kingsmould, Hum slows and looks curiously at it. Hawk throws a stern, no-nonsense look their way, reaching a hand out. Hum latches on as Hawk leads the way past the Kingsmould, away from the awful associations and experiences in that horrendous place. They swiftly pass by the ancient adornments without a second thought. Ironic. So quick was He to forget about us and discard countless vessels, when His own kingdom was doomed to fall regardless. Hawk shakes their head, jostling the thoughts away.

A small jump down here, carefully skidding down a wall a short ways with Hum clinging to their back tightly, and there they were. 

The King’s Brand.

The relic towers over even Hawk’s height. Hum pads up closer to it, watching as it glows brighter and brighter with proximity. Hawk’s seen it before, many times. It’s no surprise that Hum is still fascinated. Hawk allows them a few more moments of wonder before patting their shoulder and pointing his head left. Hum eagerly patters after him.

The Abyss... Hawk didn’t hate this place, didn’t hate the other residents of this area. It was not the Siblings’ fault they were seen as “imperfect”. If anything, Hawk felt...sad. Genuine sadness. It hurt to return here, it hurt to think about what led to all these poor souls being thrown here. Hum’s chipper mind made it less of a dreary experience than ambling this chasm alone, lost, terrified, and confused.

Stop that. Hawk shakes their head again.

Hum goes to lead the way further into the Abyss. This snaps Hawk out of their dwelling instantly. The Abyss is full of jumps that required precise timing and direction. “Platforming,” someone had called it once. While Hum is full of compassion and kindness and excitement...coordination is something they lack.

Hum had a predetermined destination in mind. Hawk would plunk down or jump over to a platform, turn around, and reliably catch Hum after them. Some had the jagged, teeth-like spikes that some landscapes in this place garnished, but they were easily avoidable. 

Instead of the steady descent to the bottom of the Abyss, Hum veers straight around halfway down. The Lifeblood Room? What was there that they hadn’t seen before?

The Lifebloods are a shocking splash of color in the scenery. Vines and buds and long-passed Lifeblood Blooms covered a door. Did Hum want inside?

Hum skitters up to a thick tangle of vines and...peers into them. Hawk wants to roll their eyes. But Hum looked like they were expecting something. Gently, Hum begins untangling the outermost vines and brambles, unraveling lengths that dwarf their own size. Deeper vines are more of a challenge for them, so they turn to Hawk’s gawking form for help.

Pat, pat! That vine? Tug! Ah, move that vine.

Hawk pulls out their double-ended, spear-like nail and sets to work. They draw it back, readying a mighty strike to slice through multiple vines in one go, but Hum intervenes frantically. 

Shakeshakeshake!! Eyes wide, arms flailing in a halting motion, their mask furiously shakes in a dissuading gesture. Hawk freezes. Hum shows them what they meant, softly making a chop! motion on the vines before looking back. Hawk nods.

The nail is as sharp as ever, but the vines are thick. They’ve been growing for ages, twining and furling and wrapping around...whatever was under them. After a span of time spent carefully, precisely peeling away the vines, Hawk sees something. Something white and scuffed.

Oh no.

Hum tries to peer over Hawk’s shoulder to see the discovery, but Hawk is working with one goal in mind: the Sibling. That was a Sibling’s mask. 

Once the majority of the vines are unraveled, Hum can see too. They immediately try to rush in to check on their fellow vessel, but Hawk holds them at bay by blocking their approach with the nail. For as much as Hawk wanted to rescue this Sibling with good intentions, the vessel wouldn’t know that at first. They might perceive it as an attack, an intrusion.

If they can still perceive.

The sight they meet wrenches Hawk’s soul.

An unseeing mask stares blankly ahead. Their body slouches against the wall behind them limply. The Sibling had been here so long that the Lifeblood Vines had actually begun to intertwine with the vessel itself, little blue roots worming into cracks in the mask and allowing blobs of blue Lifeblood to accumulate.

Hum frets immediately. They barge past Hawk’s barrier, running up to stand before the Sibling. They brush smaller twigs and leaves off the vessel delicately, eyes wide with worry.

For a moment, they wait. Is the vessel merely dormant? Will it wake like so many others have after abandonment?

Or was it...gone?

Hawk refused to believe the latter. For crying out loud, they’re entrapped in Lifeblood plants. What amount of irony and cruelty would lead to a creature dying while encased in a plant that’s literally called Lifeblood?!

So the two of them wait. Hawk stands guard, watching the Shades of other Siblings float aimlessly about forlornly. Hum plunks down to sit at the newly-found vessel’s feet, arranging little twigs and flowers into shapes.

Then the vessel twitches.

Hum nearly startles out of their lavender-colored cloak. Hawk does not ready his nail, but raises a hand, prepared to swiftly draw it if needed. They’d never harm this vessel, no. Just enough to let them know Hawk was not allowing Hum to come to harm.

The vessel scuffs a foot through the dirt, drawing their legs up to their body. Hum bounces on their toes in joy.

The vessel looks up, blearily.

What a sight to wake up to. A bouncing, excited little vessel and their self-assigned protector towering over them.

Naturally, Hum waves. Hawk watches closely.

The vessel stares blankly at the two of them. Then, feebly, raises a trembling hand to meekly greet Hum back.

Hum is ecstatic. They bounce right over to the spindly-limbed Sibling, plapping their hands on either side of their fractured mask in a mock-expression of squishing someone’s cheeks happily. For the vessel’s part, they tolerate it much more tamely than Hawk would, squinting their eyes happily at the attention. 

Hum whips around to point at Hawk and bounces a few times. The vessel turns to look. Hawk stares. Hum looks expectantly at Hawk. Hawk rolls their eyes and waves. However, not a half-hearted wave they’d fling at any other creature or bug Hum was forcing them to greet. No, this was a full-hearted wave for a fellow Sibling.

If possible, the vessel beams even brighter. Hum stands back as Hawk helps them to their feet, though they lean heavily on Hawk’s shoulder. A Hot Spring will likely help this poor, fellow soul. That, and a trip to the Mask Maker for a few repairs. Maybe getting checked over by someone that knows what they’re doing, and not just two wanderers with hearts too big for their bodies.

Hawk flicks a hand to Hum to get their attention. When Hum looks, they mimic the lines of steam a Hot Spring produces with a hand, conveying their idea to Hum. Hum brightens and nods.

Fear not, Sibling. The others forgot about both you and us, but we have not forgotten you.

[fuckyeah-yongguk]

KCrush Interview with Rapper and Songwriter Bang Yong-guk

As a Korean rapper, songwriter, and record producer, and former leader and main rapper of K-Pop group B.A.P, Bang Yong-guk has had a storied career, and he’s not even 30-years-old (born March 31, 1990)! In 2008, Yong-guk made his debut in the underground Hip-Hop group Soul Connection using the pseudonym “Jepp Blackman,” and since then, he’s become a popular figure in the Korean music scene, especially for international fans who enjoy his artistic flair and meaningful songs.

On August 19, 2018, Yong-guk’s contract with TS Entertainment ended, so he is now free to pursue his own music and projects. 2019 marks Yong-guk’s new beginnings as a soloist without the K-Pop chains.

On January 20, 2019, he made his solo comeback with the single, “Hikikomori,” his first comeback since “Drunkeness” back in May 25, 2018. We were lucky to be able to attain an interview from Bang Yong-guk, while awaiting his HIKIKOMORI single to be dropped on the 20th of January 2019.

*Thank you so much for taking time out for a KCrush Interview. Could you briefly introduce yourself to our readers please?

– Hello, this is Bang Yong-guk. It’s nice to meet you all.

*You have a new single is out on the 20th of January, tell us why did you choose “Hikikomori” as the title and the meaning behind the cover.

– Hikikomori is based on my own story which expresses the inner loneliness and confusion from my experience.

I tried to express the feelings I get when I look in the mirror and see my real self when I am off-stage, the fear I have towards the people in the outside world, and the disturbing feeling that I get from being confined in a room that seems like it is protecting me but, at times, it just feels like imprisonment. I put in the effort to put music, artwork, photography and video together. As to the artwork on the cover, I initially did the drawing and the design was developed on it.

*Your Instagram and MVs focus a lot on aesthetics and art, especially black and white images. Does art hold a lot of significance for you?

– I began using the black and white filter when uploading my photos and I continued using it.

At first, I selected the filter because I felt somewhat uncomfortable with the colorful photos seen on the social media. It really doesn’t hold any special meaning or significance, but I like the fact the black and white filter seemed to convey more colors for me personally. However, I think using black and white for other data other than my own photos may seem a bit too stubborn of me, so I am trying to use less these days. But I still like black and white.

*What kind of music are you into these days?

– Since I was working on my studio album, I didn’t get to listen much of other artists’ music other than my own. I usually enjoy listening to James Blake when I’m working. I tend to listen to the song, “Don’t Miss It” the most. James Blake is an artist who really inspires me and for that, I am very appreciative.

*It seems you’ve taken up tennis. Could we ask how good you are at playing the sport?

– I’m still a beginner. Tennis was a sport that I wanted to learn since I was young but I couldn’t make the time for it while I was active in the group.

When I left the company, tennis was the first thing I began learning. At the time, I thought to myself that I should do what I want to do when I first bought a tennis racket.

*You have a few noticeable tattoos; do they hold any particular meanings to you?

– I don’t necessarily enjoy getting myself tattooed but I have the tendency or just a weird habit of wanting to leave a trace on my body whenever I experience certain incidents.

I never got a tattoo thinking that they’d look cool on me or anything like that. When I made up my mind to get one done, I think that it was usually because I was out of control and they weren’t always done due to good memories.

*If you were a character of an anime or a video game, what would you be and why?

– That seems like a difficult one to answer. I’m just too ordinary to be like a character of any kind, and not a likely candidate to appear in an anime or a video game. If I ever thought of wanting to be one… Because I enjoy playing soccer video games, I’ve wanted to be one of the referees in a soccer video game, rather than the cool-looking soccer players.

*Which characteristics do you and your twin share and what are your differences?

– Well, I find it amusing that we have the same voice, height, and face but our personalities are completely the opposite. I like staying at home while my twin brother likes to go out and hang out with his friends.

*Will you be collaborating with any of your former group members in the future? And if you could collaborate with an American artist, who would it be?

– I always have in mind that I would be doing some great projects with the members in the future. The American artist I would like to collaborate with is Joji. Everything he has done is art.

*Do you have any movies, books or musicals that you’ve enjoyed recently?

– The Shape of Water.

*Do you have a preference to a color and what colors don’t you like?

– My wardrobe is just filled with black and white. I don’t think I like any colors that stand out in the crowd.

*What do you do to maintain your health and to release stress?

– My way of managing my health is not to pay much attention or care into it, but I would not recommend that.

I don’t know how to releasing stress, so I always keep it inside, and that’s how I am able to produce songs in the studio.

*What did you like the most about touring? How are the Babyz overseas different from the Korean Babyz?

– The tours that we’ve done have always been a joy for me. Whether it was on or off stage, they were the only times when I felt I could really breathe. And those times are filled with great memories for me. I do not think the fans outside of Korea are particularly different from Korean fans. I’m just so grateful that they love me and support what I do. I can feel they truly care about me.

*Who do you respect and feel the most grateful towards?

– My grandfather is whom I respect the most and the one I am the most thankful for. Although he is in heaven now, I still think he’s guiding me. My grandfather is practically a religion to me, and I love him.

*Please tell us about your future plans, goals and hopes for this year and beyond.

– I wish to begin this year by showcasing everything that I have to offer. My studio album is almost complete, so please show support.

I will also be doing new projects with friends who are artists to produce music, pictures, photographs, videos, fashion, designs, writing…

If any of you would like to participate, please contact me.

Now that I’m free, I think I will be able to do anything. Thank you.

Kcrush would like to thank Bang Yong-guk for his time and wish him much success with his single “Hikikomori” plus his upcoming album.

[anchoredtether]

VOLTRON FORESHADOWING META [MONSTERS & MANA AND THE FEUD]

So I made a post exploring things the D&D episode from s6 could have predicted for s7 - now that we know what happens in s7 and I’m looking back at my meta it’s slightly terrifying how many things were alluded (particularly in regards to Shiro).

I also examine things from the Feud episode, and how it pertains to s8. I think Lance is going to get a character arc in s8, as well as Pidge. Delve under the cut to see the craziness.

PARALLELS FROM MONSTERS & MANA IN S7:

Meklavar was searching for her “family heirloom” - Pidge’s family arguably had the most importance in s7 (SAM HOLT IS MY MAN ahem)

Meklavar was turned huge to defeat Dakin the first time - Pidge unlocked Voltron’s green bayard weapon which was a giant canon.

Meklavar nearly died if it weren’t for Valayun’s healing arrow - Pidge almost got tortured.

Block’s village was turned to stone - Hunk’s family was the only one in danger when they arrived on Earth, being held captive as slaves for the Galra.

Block saved the team from falling into a pit of spikes - Hunk saved the team in the Journey Within (and arguably in A Little Adventure since he was the bait).

Block initiated the “secret” in the game - Hunk fully connected with his Lion and did the eye glow with Yellow.

Pike sets off the trap - Lance was kind of the one at fault for the skunk shrinking the team in A Little Adventure, and nearly made the team lose in the Feud.

Likewise, Pike said “What can I say? I’m good at puzzles and junk” - The Feud proved he clearly isn’t. 

Pike had an invisibility cloak - Lance couldn’t connect with his Lion while everyone else could.

Alfor was on the coin Meklavar used to pay for the meal - Alfor was mentioned by Keith (in a harsh way) in The Journey Within.

Shiro wears armor exactly like Alfor’s - although it could be argued Atlas was formed because of the Castle crystal combined with the crystal in Allura’s crown that now powers Shiro’s arm, I think Shiro may have contributed to building Atlas, which parallels Alfor, the one who created Voltron.

Shiro wears a crown - Shiro’s arm is now powered by the stone from Allura’s crown.

Shiro’s master and village all died - Adam died. And although we don’t know anything about Shiro’s family, they weren’t shown at all so if he had one they could have died as well.

Shiro’s master’s dying words were “defeating the Leviathan will teach you all there is to know” - At the end of defeating the Sincline-looking machine, it was revealed to be powered by an Altean. 

The last one especially made me start thinking about how The Feud episode could foreshadow things to come in season 8.

PICTATION:

In the Pictation round, Keith draws an Arusian, the Blade of Marmora, the Red Lion, and Haggar.

When the team fails to guess “Haggar,” Bob asks “Zarkon” if he wants to play or pass. Lotor and Haggar say something really interesting.

Lotor: Play! I’ve spent centuries perfecting my exquisite, lifelike renderings. Not that you cared. Haggar: I treasure your art.

Umm... what???

Reminds me of Haggar’s line in s6:

Honerva: You’ve continued the work I started all that time ago and have indeed seen it to heights I could have only imagined.

The Altean colony will be addressed in s8, and I have a feeling there’s going to be a head-to-head with Lotor and Haggar. 

Also interesting that after the hint of the Red Lion in the Pictation game, Zarkon chooses LANCE to play the solo round. That kind of foreshadowing is making my Red Lion meta sound more and more possible. Zarkon also says that “the best offense is a good defense” - having the “dumb one” piloting the Lion you’ve tampered with certainly follows that strategy.

FACES FROM THE PAST:

Antok: Bob describes Antok as “Kolivan’s right-hand man who fought valiantly for the good of the universe.” Why would he use that DISTINCT wording of “right-hand man” in the same episode that has foreshadowing about the Red Lion and Lance unless it was supposed to mean something??? I don’t know if I’m reading into things too much or if I stumbled upon something here...

Swirn: OK THIS IS PLANCE SHIPPPER GOGGLES TIME but Lance was excited that it was Plaxa at first but then it landed on Swirn - the “serious” one. When Bob tells him her name Lance says “never would have come up with that one” and all I’m seeing is Allura and Pidge. Pidge is the “serious” one that Lance would never have guessed he’d end up with.

ANYWAY MOVING ON

Rolo: Also “Pidge loved that robot”??? Ok I’m stopping now I’ll contain myself. He remembers that Rolo “faked that distress signal” - interesting that we had that this season with the Blades and Macidus, and I’m thinking if something is up with the Red Lion something similar to The Ruins will happen in s8. Lance remembers the distress signal and Bob reminds him that Rolo “also stole the Blue Lion” and Lance says “that too” dismissively as if that was less important than the distress signal. You’d think Lance would FIRST remember that Rolo stole his precious Blue Lion?? Not that he faked some distress signal?? I seriously forgot about the distress signal, so I think they used this wording/focus for a reason.

This is where things get interesting. 

Lance is told if he doesn’t get this last face right he’ll be fed to the Snick, which is part of the title of the show.

You know what else is technically in the title of the show Voltron?

The Red Lion.

And we know it doesn’t go well for Lance as he ends up in the vat of acid. Bob first goes to Allura and she emphasizes that the universe needs Voltron. Voltron wouldn’t happen if the Red Lion was compromised. Similar to when they didn’t have a Black paladin (*cough*parallels*cough*).

Bob then asks who should save Lance, and it’s Pidge.

Pidge ends up tackling Bob (also fun to note that the light with the alarm right afterward is RED). We find out at the end that Bob is arguably some kind of “god.” You know who else is referred to as a “god” in this show?

Am I suggesting that Pidge might take on Lotor? Yes I am.

It would also be a very interesting parallel if Lance was in danger like the foreshadowing suggests, and she is the one to save him, mirroring Lance’s moment of “Don’t you touch her!” (*coughs*PLANCE*runs*)

Lance’s progression of referring to himself as the dumb one is also something of notice since it was such a focus this episode:

“Who’s he talking about?” Oblivious.

“Wait, I’m the dumb one??” Disappointed realization.

“I’m not too happy being referred to as the dumb one, like, 18 times.” Frustration.

“You know I’m the dumb one!!” Self-deprecation.

“I’m not that dumb!” Acceptance.

I’m wondering if he’s going to have some kind of realization in s8, and I think it’s going to involve both Red and his Altean broadsword bayard form.

Coran: “[Bob] judges the worthiness of great warriors.” Lance: “Well I bet he never met anyone worthier than us.” Coran: “The legends say if you meet Bob and live to tell the tale, you’re destined for great things indeed.”

And Allura’s words when Lance got the Altean broadsword?

“You have greatness within.”

And in The Voltron Show what did Coran have the Red Lion say to Lance?

“You’re great, Loverboy Lance!”

It’s interesting to note that in s7 Hunk got his arc and achieved the eye glow with his Lion, and it was addressed that Hunk is considered the coward but it was also resolved when Keith had the heart-to-heart with him and told him how much he admired him for being the most courageous. 

Lance was harped time and time again this season as being the dumb one but never got any kind of resolution. Keith did say “[Bob] was kind of a jerk” but that hardly counts, especially when Keith also picked to have Lance leave because he didn’t want to spend an eternity with him. 

I’m thinking that all of this is setting the stage for Lance to complete his arc and be fully acknowledged by the team in s8, by the means of doing something great. And I still think it has something to do with my Red Lion meta but we will have to wait and see.

[likeadove]

(fic) we could plant a house, we could build a tree (4/?)

Summary:  Seven-year-old Rey decides it’s her duty to annoy the crap out of Ben Solo every single day she’s alive. Modern-day AU.

Rating: M

Chapters: 1, 2 , 3

FFN  AO3

That weekend proved to be particularly stressful. 

Rey isn’t sure why keeping her action figures and Pound Puppies stored in the closet instead of on the floor by her bed is imperative to the Senator having a smooth visit, but she obeys.

Maz looks frazzled enough.

On Monday Rey waits outside the home with the other children, watching with a frown as a sleek black car pulls into the long driveway. She hasn’t forgotten what Luke said the other night, about the senator being his sister. And she wonders, if she’s Luke’s sister, if that makes her—

Rey’s suspicions are confirmed as soon as Senator Leia Organa steps out of the car. Rey recognizes Ben in the way this woman carries herself, in the way her warm brown gaze sweeps over the sight in front of her and takes note of her surroundings. In the way the corner of her mouth pulls into an almost smile. Maz walks out to greet her and the two women shake hands.

The next couple of hours are incredibly boring, considering all the hullabaloo that lead up to them. Rey isn’t overly impressed with who she suspects is Ben’s mom. All the senator does is walk around, talk, and ask questions. Rey distracts herself by staring at Organa’s bodyguard and the gun holstered to his hip. It looks kinda cool, and Rey commits herself to trying to draw him later. Ben might think it’s interesting.

She is so deep in her thoughts (markers would be fun for this project but pencils would be more precise for lines) that Senator Organa has to tap her shoulder to get her attention. She bends down so that she’s looking Rey eye-to-eye and holds out her hand, introducing herself.

Maz’s furious look from over the senator’s shoulder prompts Rey to shake it. Leia smiles. “You must be Rey. I’ve heard so much about you.” She leans in a little closer. “I hear you’re a family friend.”

Rey’s mouth drops open a little bit and suddenly she feels incredibly shy. This only makes Leia smile more fondly. “Luke showed me some of your drawings earlier today. You’re quite talented.”

Rey only remembers to say ‘thank you’ because Maz is mouthing it frantically over Leia’s shoulder.

**

Rey is spreading her Pound Puppies back out across her side of the room where they belong when she stills, mind puzzling over her odd day. If the senator is Ben’s mom, then she’s sent her son away. And maybe that means Ben was left behind just like her

**

Tuesdays are painting days.

Rey isn’t sure how she feels yet about painting. She prefers bending over a sketch pad with markers or charcoal or pencils—less messy. Besides, whatever she manages to paint always seem to pale in comparison to what Ben can do. He may denounce colors and their use, but with them he creates portraits of places Rey would love to adventure off to.

Today she settles herself in their usual corner. She pulls out the small set of paints that Maz had gotten her for Christmas the year before and waits for Ben to slide onto his stool next to her.

But he never comes, and soon Luke is clearing his throat at the front of the classroom, the other students quieting and giving him their attention. Rey bites her bottom lip and peers around, because Ben has never missed a class in the whole year that Rey has been coming here—

Something is wrong.

She shoves her paint set back into her backpack and softly exits the classroom, not noticing Luke’s eyes swivel in her direction when the door closes behind her.

She checks the kitchen-office first, because maybe he’s making a pot of coffee and lost track of the time, or maybe he has his headphones on and didn’t hear Luke tell him class was starting soon—

But he’s not there.

Feeling herself grow antsy, she marches room to room and thoroughly checks each of them. Ben isn’t in any of them, of course, and Rey realizes with a sinking feeling where he must be. She wanders to the bottom of the staircase that leads to the upper level. The level she’s never been in, has had no reason to go in.

She squares her shoulders and places a small hand on the railing, pulled forward by some feeling of protectiveness. She needs to find Ben Solo and draw him pictures of puppies swearing, or Beavis and Butthead, or—

Rey reaches the top of the stairs and looks around, taking in the small living room with its entertainment center and a TV that’s playing the local news. There are art projects everywhere, half finished sculptures and drying paintings representing a smorgasbord of Luke and Ben’s work. Before Rey can get too distracted, she hears music.

Following the music will mean finding Ben. Hitching her backpack up her shoulder, she walks through the living room and into a hallway on the right. There are three doors. She guesses one leads to Luke’s bedroom, one leads to the bathroom he must share with Ben, and the other…the other is slightly cracked with soft light shining from underneath.

She gently pushes it open and is reminded starkly of pushing open another door a year ago. Except she doesn’t find Ben flinging paint at a bedsheet, but stretched across his own bed, lying face down.

His room smells like teenage boy. She’s been around enough of them by now to recognize that particular musk. In one corner a red lava lamp sits on the floor, casting an eerie glow about the rest of the room. There’s a massive Doom poster stretching across one wall and a Stephen King novel sitting on his bedside table. A stereo sits on a bookshelf, much nicer then the paint splattered one he keeps downstairs. Melancholy music pours out of it.

She glances back to Ben. There’s a fist sized hole in the wall right next to his bedpost. And on the bedside table, next to the Stephen King novel, is a small framed photo of what must have once been a happy family. A much younger Ben smiles out at her, teeth missing, with a handsome couple standing behind him. Rey has never seen the man in the photo, but she instantly recognizes the fond smile and warm brown gaze of Senator Organa.

So he was left behind, just like her.

Rey looks back at his face and jumps, realizing that his eyes are open, watching her. He raises his head enough to mutter, “Fuck off, kid.” But there’s no real malice in his voice.

She stands still for a long moment before dropping her backpack and sitting cross-legged on the floor. She pulls out a sketchpad and a black marker, tilting the paper toward the lava lamp in order to take advantage of its light. She’s not sure how long she sits there, drawing and listening to the music.

She draws a tree. A black hulking tree with two figures sitting in its shade.

When she is done she looks back up at Ben and notices that he’s fallen asleep, his head cradled on his arm and facing her. As if he’d been watching her.

When she’s finished she silently puts her things away and stands, determined not to wake him. She also likes to just go to sleep when she’s sad, sometimes.

She places the drawing in front of the framed picture of a broken family and creeps from his room, footsteps silent.

**

A life is time, they teach you growing up The seconds ticking killed us all A million years before the fall You ride the waves and don’t ask where they go

“Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in My Hand” by Primitive Radio Gods

**

A/N: Once again, thanks everyone for reading and commenting! Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this chapter, I know it was more angst then fluff this time. Poor Ben and Rey :( This is it for ‘98. See y'all again in '99! We’ll be meeting some more of our beloved characters next time as well!

[thephantomprojectionist]

Film Face-Off: Deadly Target (1994) Vs. White Tiger (1996)

While re-watching some of my movies in search of something to review, I realized how strikingly similar 1994’s Deadly Target and 1996’s White Tiger appear to be. Both are pretty good vehicles from Gary Daniels’ solo career, and seemingly by coincidence, they have the same plot. This realization and the provisional quality of the films makes me want to try something new and turn this would-be review into a competitive comparison between the two. Should be fun, right?

Know now that this article’s almost exclusively for the Gary Daniels fans out there. Few casual viewers will have seen both features, but hey, we’re all about niches here at B-Movie Dragons.

First, some background. Deadly Target is a PM Entertainment production, and while not the first starring picture for Gary Daniels, it’s his first solo vehicle that’s actually good. Indeed, it wasn’t until PM gave him this nudge that the prettyboy kickboxer from London became Gary friggin’ Daniels. Just a couple years afterwards, he was working on a Hong Kong feature when the production went broke and was bought out by the Canada-based Keystone Pictures company. Keystone scrapped the existing footage and did away with the storyline, committing themselves to a completely different movie called White Tiger, which inexplicably ended up being very similar to Daniels’ aforementioned feature. There’s no evidence that this was actually their intention, but there’s no denying the parallels.

Now, let’s look at which version of this adventure did it better.

The Story

In both features, a law enforcement agent seeks to capture a rogue member of the Chinese-American mafia who’s killed the hero’s partner en route to distributing an addictive narcotic on the West Coast. In both cases, the hero is aided by a love interest and the final showdown takes place on a docked ship.

The overriding difference between the two is how seriously the story takes itself. As tends to be the case with PM productions, Deadly Target is lighthearted with a noticeable comedic streak. It’s a popcorn flick despite never having seen the inside of a theater. Contrarily, White Tiger is far too serious to have much fun with itself. It goes for drama over laughs, and even when there is some humor, it’s dry or ironic. Merely considering this, I prefer the former. While I can see some viewers being bored by Deadly Target’s 90s-style cheesiness, it’s the same cheese which gives the story texture and an organic quality that White Tiger lacks. That said, White Tiger invests you more in its characters. While not the most skillfully-written action feature, it knows what it’s going for and does a good job of directing viewers’ emotions. Deadly Target’s characters are established as soon as they appear onscreen, but White Tiger’s tend to not show their cards right away. There’s development here, and it’s not just limited to the leads. The movie wants you to think about characters’ motivations, and it’s ambitious enough to try and surprise the audience at intervals with out-of-nowhere twists. Wisely, it doesn’t overplay its hand: though it liberally sprinkles the thriller aspects,  it never forgets that we’re expecting an action movie and makes sure to avoid pretentiousness. To that end, it wins me over. Deadly Target may be more fun, but White Tiger gives me more to write about. It’s a pretty good movie with which to introduce newcomers to Gary Daniels, whereas Deadly Target is mainly for established B-movie audiences.

Point: White Tiger

The Hero

Gary Daniels wasn’t the greatest actor at this point in his career and his starring roles sort of blend together. Such is the case when you compare these movies: he’s Detective Charles Prince in Deadly Target and Agent Mike Ryan in White Tiger, and they seem like merely different takes on the same character. The major difference between them is that Charles seems to have more fun with his life-or-death mission, taking the time to crack jokes and express interest in other things while Mike pursues his target with uniform intensity. You can see practically Charles in an early scene of White Tiger while the hero’s vacationing with his partner’s family, and Mike seems to pop up in Deadly Target whenever he’s faced with the lead villain.

When it comes to their motivations, Mike is a little easier to empathize with. Charles mentions that the villain killed his (first) partner, but with Mike, you not only see this happen but also experience his investment in his partner’s family. This favors White Tiger, and it doesn’t help that Charles seems to have some sort of unspoken homophobia going on…but despite that, I give the point to Deadly Target. For all his shallowness, Charles is simply more likable. Gary Daniels turns in a better dramatic performance for Mike, but he’s just not interesting enough to make his relentless seriousness worthwhile. Charles is an example of Daniels having fun with a role, and in this case, it wins him the category.

Point: Deadly Target

The Villain

A hero is only as impressive as their adversary, and in both cases, Gary Daniels draws a good card for a bad guy: Byron Mann as Chang in Deadly Target and Cary Hiroyuki-Tagawa as Victor Wong in White Tiger. Mann and Tagawa are both acclaimed performers who, despite having predominantly acted in other genres, are generally known for playing martial artists – Mann in Street Fighter: The Movie and Tagawa in Mortal Kombat. Both are versatile actors who swing between low-budget and Hollywood-grade productions with ease, bringing class to both while keeping their dignity intact. For both movies, they elevate the production and help legitimize Gary Daniels with their presence.

That said, I’m more impressed by Cary in this instance. Part of it’s just that his character’s written with greater nuance, but he also just has the stronger presence. It helps that this role goes against type for him, so that he’s not depicting an upright sentinel for a change. He starts off like that, but within minutes you get the impression that Victor Wong would be more at home in The Silence of the Lambs than Showdown in Little Tokyo. By the time the movie reaches its climax, Victor has become a self-destructive freak, single-handedly justifying the film’s drug & fire motif. Comparatively, Mann doesn’t have much going for him other than that he’s obviously having fun. Byron manifests the tone of the screenplay perfectly, but his character sometimes goes absent long enough for me to almost forget he’s the bad guy. Given his youth, Mann may seem like the more obvious choice for an underworld renegade who’s upsetting the established order, but Tagawa stands out thanks to Victor’s greater depth. (Also, he has a fight scene with Gary Daniels, which Mann doesn’t.)

Point: White Tiger

The Love Interest

Please forgive the condescension this label implies, but in both movies, the most prominent female character is largely defined by her relationship with the hero. Nevertheless, Susan Byun’s Diana Tang and Julia Nickson’s Jade are uniquely different characters that lend differing tones to their features. Diana is a warm-hearted person who, despite working in a casino owned by a mob boss, leads a pretty sheltered life. Jade spends much of her movie being an enigma, clearly knowing more than she’s letting on. Diana wants to get intimate with Charles because she feels genuinely attracted to him, whereas Jade is a femme fatale who nudges Mike along and has sex with him only to further a personal agenda. Also, Jade is infinitely more in touch with her Hong Kong heritage while Diana is utterly Americanized and initially repulsed when Charles prepares her a “Chinese delicacy” with squid.

As for who earns the point, it comes down to how they fare in the face of danger, and there’s really no question. Diana introduces herself by clubbing an attacker in the head to rescue Charles and later goes on to have two unexpected fight scenes. Susan Byun becomes a temporary action hero despite her character’s conventions, but Julia Nickson ironically fares worse. White Tiger spends much time building Jade up as an experienced assassin, but when the need for her to make a move arises, she’s instantly overwhelmed and becomes a damsel without really having accomplished anything. For both of these characters, they end up doing the exact opposite of what you’d expect, but only Diana benefits from it. It’s a cheap move on the part of White Tiger’s writers to ultimately demean their character this way, and in this instance, it costs them.

Point: Deadly Target

The Supporting Cast

Which set of supporting characters you end up preferring is largely dependent on what tone you favor, as all the performers do a good job reflecting the mood of their picture. Again, there are many parallel roles that are merely played differently. Portraying the hero’s partner is Ken McLeod in Deadly Target and Matt Craven in White Tiger: martial arts-practicing straight man and tragic best buddy. Both police captains are played by award-winning TV actors: colic-y Max Gail (Barney Miller) and the reserved Philip Granger (Neon Rider). The most visible mafia lord is played by the expressive Aki Aleong in the first film and the graceful Dana Lee in the other. Both feature henchman extraordinaire Ron Yuan as the villain’s lieutenant, but he’s only a fully-fledged character in Deadly Target. Last but not least are the roles good ol’ George Cheung plays: he’s a mafia figure with no lines in the first picture, and one of the more interesting co-stars in the second.

If there was nothing else to consider, I’d happily decree this category a draw, but the deciding factor ends up being the amplitude of supporting fighters in Deadly Target. It’s a cool lineup: Leo Lee, Al Leong, James Lew, Randall Shiro Ideishi, and Koichi Sakamoto all have at least one highlighted altercation, and the late Master Bill Ryusaki plays one of the more active henchmen. Lieutenant Lydia Look – along with her stunt double, Olympian taekwondoka Dana Hee – has a couple of surprisingly good fights against Susan Byun. By comparison, White Tiger doesn’t bother highlighting many of its supporting kickers, and that seals it for me.

Point: Deadly Target

The Production

In addition to the filmmakers’ talent, the quality of a movie’s production is a matter of time and budget, and it’s easy to tell which of these films had more. As I’ve mentioned, Deadly Target is a PM Entertainment film, and while PM was great at maximizing its resources and cranking out exciting B-movies, it’s obvious that these are, in fact, B-movies. Deadly Target’s no exception: the locations are unremarkably urban, the cinematography is staid, the camerawork isn’t dynamic, and even the film quality is a little grainy. Director Charla Driver – one of the few women to direct a PM production and one of the few women to direct a U.S. martial arts feature, period – is every bit as good as her cohorts at putting together a compact and entertaining action package, but there’s no opportunity for it to rise above that status.

White Tiger, on the other hand, may easily be mistaken for a Hollywood production. Keystone Pictures would actually produce a couple of those shortly after this one, which in retrospect seems like a warm-up exercise for director Richard Martin. The movie showcases some exotic locations, has a lot of good-looking sets, and actually has the time to do fun stuff with its camera. The musical stings are almost comically overdone at times, but the soundtrack still stands out where its adversary’s is forgettable. The movie generates mixed results when trying to be artsy but still has the finesse to qualify as a neo-noir. Whereas both features are by-the-numbers in their own way, White Tiger is simply more lavish and thereby pulls ahead.

Point: White Tiger

The Action

In a way, this is the most important category. Action pieces and fight scenes are the backbone of any martial arts feature, and with a star as capable as Gary “Danger Man” Daniels in the lead, both productions knew they had the potential to make a minor action classic. To help get them there, both selected fantastic coordinators to get the job done: Deadly Target had Jeff Pruitt and White Tiger had the late, great Marc Akerstream.

Pruitt was an exotic regular of the TV and DTV realms from 1991 to 2003. As the first American member of the Japan-based Alpha Stunts team, his cohorts and he brought a dynamic, stunt-heavy style of action to the small screen. Though best known for working on Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Jeff regularly got career-defining performances out of the performers he directed, particularly DTV golden boy Jeff Wincott. Deadly Target was the first (and thus far only) time Pruitt collaborated with Gary Daniels, and the Hong Kong veteran works well with the style of his handler. No slouch either is Akerstream, whose career highlight may have been working with Jackie Chan by coordinating the vehicle that gained JC fame in America: Rumble in the Bronx. Though he tended to work in low-budget fare, he coordinated several times in Hollywood blockbusters and did a ton of work for TV. Tragically, an accident on the set of The Crow: Stairway to Heaven ended his life in 1998.

White Tiger may actually be Marc’s magnum opus as an action filmmaker, as he delivers some strong pieces without being relegated by a higher-placed coordinator. Though this is primarily a martial arts movie, it mixes things up with some vehicle scenes and shootouts. Deadly Target does this as well, but White Tiger has a flair in that regard that the former can’t top, especially when it comes to the well-choreographed scenes with the biker assassins. Still, Gary Daniels’ fight scenes are the highlights of the picture, and what highlights they are! The brawls dig deep into Daniels’ real-life abilities, featuring not only a plethora of spinning kicks but also aikido throws and intricate kung fu exchanges. A showdown with Ron Yuan is pretty cool, and the final match with Cary Hiroyuki-Tagawa is a very decent brawl.

However, the increased production standards ultimately work against White Tiger via over-editing. While not horrible, the fight scenes are filled with cuts and slow motion that tries to fool you into thinking that the brawls are even better than they already are. Gary Daniels isn’t some inexperienced Ken doll with shortcomings that need disguising, so the editing tricks are facetious. Deadly Target’s fights have no such problems, with their long takes and limited slow motion. Though Jeff Pruitt’s heavy usage of throws and flips may seem excessive to some, the fact is that his film’s simply less restrained in showcasing physicality. While I understand that White Tiger’s action may simply be a matter of stylistic consistency, Deadly Target’s greater willingness to show a fight junkie like me everything its performers have to offer puts it over its competition.

Point: Deadly Target

The Winner: Deadly Target

Deadly Target (1994) Directed by Charla Driver (assistant director for Ice Cream Man) Written by James Adelstein, Michael January (To Be the Best) Starring Gary Daniels, Susan Byun (Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D.), Ken McLeod (College Kickboxers), Byron Mann Cool costars: Ron Yuan, Aki Aleong (Farewell to the King), Lydia Look (Battle of the Damned), Philip Tan (Martial Law), Master Bill Ryusaki (Ulterior Motives), George Cheung (First Blood II), Al Leong (Rapid Fire), Leo Lee (The Perfect Weapon), James Lew (Balance of Power), Randall Shiro Ideishi (Black Scorpion), Koichi Sakamoto (Bounty Tracker), Butch Togisala (Firepower) Content warning: Violence against women, kidnapping, police brutality Copyright PM Entertainment Group / Echo Bridge Home Entertainment

White Tiger (1996) Directed by Richard Martin (Air Bud: Golden Receiver) Written by Bey Logan (original story), Gordon Melbourne (Bulletproof Heart), Roy Sallows, Don Woodman, Raul Inglis (uncredited) Starring Gary Daniels, Cary Hiroyuki-Tagawa, Julia Nickson (Noble House), Matt Craven (Crimson Tide) Cool costars: Ron Yuan, George Cheung, Dana Lee (Dr. Ken) Content warning: Violence against women, torture, sexual assault Copyright Keystone Pictures / Crown Media

[celinamarniss]

Visual depictions of women in the Thrawn Trilogy comics; or, how much I hate the effing catsuit

As you may have noticed, I bought digital copies of the Thrawn Trilogy comics, and reread the series (though honestly? I skimmed a lot. Most of Dark Force Rising). 

I HAVE NO REGRETS. 

The thing about the series that interested me the most was the art. There are three artistic teams across the series, each with a slightly different style. Here's the gang:

  I can't say enough good things about the background work the first artistic team does. Gorgeous planets, interesting interior design, fun page layouts. BUT. I have some of issues when it comes to the way the artist who drew the issue draws people. ESPECIALLY with their depictions of women. Get ready for my feminist killjoy rant on how comics are terrible. 

Let's start with Leia. 

Part I: PUT SOME DAMN CLOTHES ON LEIA.

Leia is one of our lead characters, obviously. And how she's depicted isn't all that bad, most of the time. In Heir she seems to be wearing some sort of black catsuit covered with a weird yellow vest, but she's more clothed than a lot of the other characters. But thennnn the comic will put her in situations in which she isn't wearing anything at all. 

Of course you had to manufacture a situation in which your female lead wouldn't be wearing any clothes. 

Then there's a whole scene where she runs around wearing only her underwear:  

This goes on for six pages. 

She INTERROGATES A PRISONER IN HER UNDERWEAR. There is no good reason this should be happening. 

WHY. COMICS WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS. 

It’s less of a problem in the following books, especially in The Last Command, where she wears a variety of formal and casual outfits, and doesn’t loose her clothes for no reason at all.  And then we come to our second female lead, Mara. Part II: THE EFFING CATSUIT

According to what I've heard from fandom, these comics are the first appearance of Mara's catsuit. I have no proof of that, but the catsuit is never described as what Mara's wearing at any point in the original novels (in fact, if described at all, she tends to wear long sleeves to cover her holdout blaster). 

I don't know who's to blame for that decision, if it was the artist's choice or someone on the creative team or at Lucasfilm. I wouldn't be shocked if it was the artist's decision, especially the lack of sleeves, considering the fact sleeves are pretty scarce in general: 

Space is cold! Don't these space people want to be cosy???

Like I said, I don't have proof that the sleeves catsuit originated here, but ...I would not be surprised. I am fully prepared to lay the blame on this anti-sleeve artist.

(side note: Luke looses his sleeves a LOT in these comics, and you could argue some level of objectification there, but not at the same degree as the women, and the context is different, anyway. 

Know who never looses his clothes at any point? Han Solo.)  

The first appearance of the catsuit: 

(she’s a charmer!)

It's not just what she's wearing. She's nearly always posed in ways that bring her boobs and butt to attention. 

She's literally reduced to tits and ass in this frame: 

I'm like ....really? REALLY?

The art team switches in Dark Force Rising and again in The Last Command, but the problem remains consistent. 

She's a barbie. 

Just...look. Breasts don't do that in a skintight suit, unless she's wearing a push-up bra underneath, and why would she do that???? 

We don’t see Karrde’s ass featured in every frame! 

She even assembles weaponry... without her clothes on. OH COME ON. 

There's the pose again. 

And yeah, I know, this is how women in comics look. That doesn't mean I want it in my Star Wars, or that I can't go into a frothing rage every once and while. I know I’m probably overreacting, but this is the image that’s defined Mara for so long, and I resent that.  First of all, the catsuit is meant to objectify and over-sexualize a female character. That's straight up what's going on here. Someone looked at this complicated female character who had a prominent role in the series and decided they needed to make her more palpable to male fans by making her "sexier." It's misogynistic. 

(yes, women can enjoy looking at other women in catsuits, but the machine behind star wars has always been more interested in catering to what they perceive the male fans want.)

I hate the catsuit so much. 

Not only does it objectify Mara, it drives me crazy how out-of-character the catsuit is. Mara was trained to operate from the shadows, and not to draw attention to herself. She blends in. A skintight catsuit is way too flashy, in a universe where skintight catsuits aren't the norm. It just doesn’t make sense for her character. 

Most of all, Mara’s practical, something a catsuit is not. How is she supposed to move in that thing? How does she hide her holdout? How does she pee? 

You know what's practical and pretty common in Star Wars? A flight suit! But that doesn't seem to be what they're going for here. 

A practical flight suit! With pockets! 

This is what I imagine Mara wearing a lot of the time, or the pants/shirt/jacket/boots outfit that a lot of the other characters in the movies wear. You know, to blend in! 

(I might buy an argument for her wearing a black jumpsuit when running secret missions, but not so much working as a smuggler on the Fringe!) 

That first appearance of the catsuit in the panels above? She's having a meeting with her boss. A business meeting in which she makes clear that she won't use her body as leverage to gain a promotion. She holds positions of authority throughout the books, and I can't help but suspect that that catsuit is undermining that authority (something Mara would never stand for!) 

The catsuit might be justified if Mara was the type of character to use her sexuality and physical appearance to get what she wants, but that's not something she ever does in the novels. (In contrast to Shada, for instance, who does use her physical appearance as a smokescreen). 

And the lack of sleeves just BUGS me. Mara's signature weapon is a holdout blaster that she hides up her sleeves. It's a plot point! GIVE HER SLEEVES. 

The catsuit isn't mentioned in her debut appearance in the Thrawn Trilogy, and isn't described in most of the books (it starts to show up in one or two books written long after it was established as her signature visual). 

Relatedly, Mara's figure is often compared to that of a dancer's, and if that's meant to evoke a ballet dancer, which I think it is, that's a very distinct body type that tends to be lean and muscular, and very much not voluptuous. Apparently the artists of the comics didn't get that memo. (Can we stop with the balloon boobs? please?) She's also usually depicted with her hair down, which also doesn't strike me as very sensible, especially going into a combat situation! 

Almost all art of Mara features the catsuit. It's all over the place, in official and fan art. When people google Mara, that's what they see. Occasionally, the suit is rendered in a way that isn't too objectifying, but there are some pretty egregious examples of the opposite. I won't post any examples; they're easy to find. Many of them are of her during her career the Emperor's Hand, when Mara was about 16-21. She was a teenager. 

Ew. 

Obviously, there's nothing I can do about the catsuit and the fact that it's permanently linked to Mara's image. I just try to keep it off my blog (I don't reblog images of Leia's slave outfit either, for the same reasons). I would love LOVE to see new art of Mara that didn't feature the catsuit. There are so many good artists doing fantastic new Star Wars art out there! Give my girl some love. PS. Club Jade has a similar article on the catsuit, with a little more detail on the catsuit's history and some discussion in the comments worth looking into. 

[idolizerp]

LOADING INFORMATION ON CHERRY BOMB!’S MAIN VOCAL LIM SEOLHEE ...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Sophia CURRENT AGE: 23 DEBUT AGE: 17 TRAINEE SINCE: 14 COMPANY: MSG SECONDARY SKILL: Acting

IDOL PROFILE

NICKNAME(S): sunshine for her image as the energy pill, saseumi for her doe-eyed beauty, bookworm because she’s been captured in airport and fansign photos holding well-read books on multiple occasions, seolcasso–seolhee + picasso for her artistic talents, heethoven– seolhee + beethoven as derived from her initial vlives where she would ask fans to send in requests for piano covers to do. INSPIRATION: her love for music is hereditary–what with her mother being a piano teacher and her grandmother’s blessed voice. she thinks she was born to embrace and to fall in love with the sound of music and, thus, desires to inspire others with her voice. SPECIAL TALENTS:

drawing & painting–her mediums being charcoal and watercolor, respectively.

a walking jukebox, which came from a few variety show appearances during group promotions where she was able to sing acapella to every single song requested by the mcs.

plays the piano, guitar, and guzheng & has been known to fulfill fan requests for her to cover other idol groups’ songs.

NOTABLE FACTS:

speaks korean, english, italian fluently.

graduated from seoul’s school of performing arts & attending seoul institute of the arts.

a huge fan of harry potter and has been quoted in an interview saying luna lovegood is the character she relates most to.

loves cooking & baking as a way to de-stress.

a known lover of dogs and children–has been captured in fancams with her signature dimpled smile playing with a dog or taking pictures with older fans who bring small children to fansigns.

IDOL GOALS

SHORT-TERM GOALS:

she wants cherry bomb! to gain more notoriety as a whole–perhaps, a first music show win to show that they’ve reached a level of public reception that would propel her and her girls further on their individual paths. maybe then, she can utilize her group branding to help give her budding acting career a much needed boost.

LONG-TERM GOALS:

she wants to shatter expectations for idol actors. because despite her dramas not achieving much success/critical reception in terms of rating, she’s really fallen in love with acting and wants so desperately to be taken seriously as an actress, to be recognized for her craft. eventually when she’s broken the mold–hopefully via a breakout role in a successful drama–she wants to then ask msg if she can pursue a solo career in music–venture into singing osts or actually debut with a song she’s composed or written herself. somewhere further down the line, when the novelty of being in a girl group has well and truly faded, she hopes to be established as a well-rounded artist in music and in film/television.

IDOL IMAGE

BEFORE.

they call her chameleon–the judges.

it’s not an insult, they reassure with a flash of teeth and blood red lips. you’ve got a pretty face and a nice voice. (pause.) but no personality.

she learns later–much, much later–what it means to be a blank slate.

-

it takes three years to break the bones of a girl who constantly feels out of place in a room full of her peers.

three years to perfect the art of makeup, to dress to impress, to walk in sky-high heels like she was born for it.

all it takes is three years behind closed doors in an industry where survival of the fittest means fighting with everyone and anyone for a chance at becoming the next big thing for her to learn that the world of fame is paved with sacrifice.

three years to realize that to stand on that brightly lit stage, she must murder herself; set her innocent self on fire and reborn from the ashes someone stronger, brighter, warmer.

TABULA RASA.

trainee days spent isolating herself as the quiet, hardworking girl is buried under rigid lessons and rules of thumb on how to construct a new layer of skin to stitch around herself. years of crying behind closed doors and missing home is replaced by a fresh-faced girl who laughs at everything, smiles at everyone, and bounces back with enthusiasm after a fall—sunshine in ecstatic motion.

from practice room to the bright stage, msg sinks their claws into a lost girl with stars in her eyes and molds her into something whimsical and ethereal. they take all the broken parts of her that seep through the cracks and tell her to bury it behind a radiant smile. creates a mask for her to wear by exploiting all the mismatched parts of her that make her who she is: the dazed look of a dreamer, the seaside accent that still roils under seoul’s modern cadence, her restless hands, the purity of her lilting voice.

they take all that and slip onto her the delicate skin of a walking ray of sunshine with a heart of gold and a thousand watts smile.

on stage and on camera, she’s cherry bomb!’s little energy pill. she’s warm, a little absentminded, not quite there, but innocent all the same. it’s that charm–that little dimple in her cheek–that captivates. sets her apart. if only for a little bit.

she doesn’t mind it–not really.

it’s just another mask she wears. another role she plays.

she’s young. she has time. to change, to mature, to grow out of the novelty of it all.

(she doesn’t.)

AFTER.

four years in the eyes of the public and she’s muffled peals of laughter hidden behind small hands and eyes creasing into half moon crescents. sometimes, she’s softly uttered words of praise, advice, encouragements to her faithful fans on instagram live or a whole chorus of a newly uploaded acoustic cover sung in the voice almost too soft to hear above the strum of guitars, gratitude embedded in three minutes of heartfelt lyrics and shining eyes. to the world, seolhee is someone fragile and in need of protection. almost too good for the world. almost too untainted and pristine. (almost too good to be true.)

from her endearing attempts to interact with and befriend fans and fellow idols alike to her occasional variety show appearances where she’s the perpetually 4d absentminded girl with the dimpled smile hosts have to subtly prompt and prod for answers to their questions about her trending airport fashion, her faithful fansites and fancams in 4k depicting her pristine and perfect on stage (not a hair out of place, her smile perpetually stitched on her face. never faltering. never wavering), growing up pains, childhood in busan, her lingering accent.

there’s always a bit of lasting unconventionality hidden in those moments when they ask about home, about family, about transitioning from the carefree, quiet life on busan’s sandy shores to the pulsating thrum of the big city with its too fast pace and perpetual anonymity.

how did you survive, they ask. i didn’t. she wants to confess. i adapted. i changed, is what she says instead.

and it’s the truth. msg takes her hand-me-downs and thrift-shopped dresses and replaces them with sponsored one pieces with the tags still on them, shiny mary janes in place of worn converses, her sea salt-scented braid of hair is combed and styled in soft waves tumbling down her back and smells of peaches, her unruly tongue fixed under an iron fist to master the straight-laced way of seoul-speak.

she’s made to rid herself of all the things that make her her.

every night, she goes to sleep; her face scrubbed clean, the skin of her good girl persona somewhere on the floor. every morning, she wakes when the sun rises and pulls her skin back on, pats her face dry of tears, and presses two fingers to the corners of her mouth, pushing up until a small dimple forms on her cheek. there, transformation complete.operation sophia is a go.

every day is a vicious cycle. it’s walking on eggshells and pretending someone else isn’t living beneath this suffocating skin, wallowing in years of self-deprecation and the perpetual ache of longing (for something, for someone, for the taste of home—wherever that may be).

-

six years later and she’s still warm. still smiling. just a little dimmer. a little softer.

she’s got this look about her now–almost fragile; whimsical in a way that garners second glances when people first meet her or see her sitting in a corner of the room lingering on the outskirts of conversations, staring into space. a waifish doll; an effortless kind of beauty. ethereal; almost surreal.

she talks softly with a touch of poetic elusiveness and practiced eccentricity, designed to fluster or to purposely dazzle. she stares like she’s trying to see through you. into you. she’s a soft kind of pretty when she’s caught in between camera flashes or in the midst of whispered conversations with one of her members. and yet, on stage and on television wearing the skin of someone else–someone polished and manufactured, she’s danger in high heels.

catch her off-guard and all alone in the dead of the night with her face scrubbed clean and swathed in a too big hoodie and you’ll notice there’s a strange kind of dichotomy when you realize the girl you watched on tv belting high notes or crying her heart out in her latest drama is vastly different from the lonely girl who looks the spitting image of her, sitting for hours in front of a painting in an art gallery or by the han gazing into the waters.

softer, sadder, dreamier.

still as lost as ever.

IDOL HISTORY

PRELUDE.

appa falls in love with eomma in italy, five years after their fateful first encounter in the circus that is high school. a whirlwind romance between a budding photographer and a piano teacher. must be fate, the wedding guests whisper when they vow eternity to one another in a church filled with friends and family who wish them well with warm smiles and teary eyes.

so they love and love and love and somewhere in between, a baby girl is born.

eomma cries; she’s so happy. relieved, she admits years later with a kiss to her forehead. they’ve been trying and trying, after all.

appa cries too. because here she is; another girl for him to love, to protect. a gift from heaven.

they name her sophia, after the saint.

ONE.

they return home after the honeymoon phase fizzles and fades, settling in busan with halmeoni amidst student loans and living on budgets. there, she grows up a free-spirited daydreamer, often associating the world and the people around her in streaks of color and a symphony of sounds. her childhood consists of sand between her toes, sea salt in her hair, ocean-soaked dresses, and the sound of tinkling laughter.

her four seasons of growing up on the sandy shores of busan goes a little like this:

spring: an almost brand new knee-length dress made of white lace her mother buys from a thrift shop at a discounted rate, sunflowers and daisies dancing in the wind, chasing butterflies, and flower bookmarks pressed into the pages of a journal.

summer: ripe with music, her spread eagle on a blanket and sunset golds streaked across her face, the drone of cicadas, cherry popsicles, the whir of electric fans, knee-deep in the sea, her mother calling her name off in the distance.

autumn: a waterfall of warm colors, halmeoni’s cozy handmade sweaters with the sleeves hanging past her fingertips, gingham skirts and leggings, pumpkin pies, spiced lattes, a night sky filled with paper lanterns and the glimmer of stars, father’s phone ringing off the hook in the middle of the night; every night.

winter: soft pink mittens and oversized pea coats over chunky sweaters and chunkier scarves made with love, homemade hot chocolate, footprints in fresh snow, one hand clasped in mother’s hand; the other grasping air, perpetual cold; lingering emptiness.

she’s seven, wide-eyed and curious, watching a master chef work her magic. it’s halmeoni in a soft yellow dress and a spongebob apron around her waist singing deulgukhwa hits and humming to joo hyunmi and patti kim. it’s little seolhee perched on the counter by the fridge singing right along in a game of monkey see, monkey do.

early evening always starts with the swell of a sobangcha song, halmeoni wielding a carrot under her chin and seolhee’s little face crinkling up in peals of laughter. in the living room, her parents smile indulgently, hands busy tucking unpaid bills under week-old newspapers and balls of colorful yarn. and ends with seolhee curled in halmeoni’s lap, both hands clutching her parents’ sleeve in her sleep.

days and nights like these are normal—until they’re not.

one cold night in december, dinner prep is a somber affair. the radio is turned off and secondhand vinyls gather dust—buried under boxes full of knick-knacks and memories. there’s no halmeoni twirling in the kitchen, no tongue-in-cheek adlib to the latest hit trot song, no laughter.

home is quiet. empty. and little seolhee aches with the feeling of missing someone no amount of singing or wishing could ever bring back.

TWO.

she’s ten when she learns to make friends with an old guitar she buys off a neighbor moving to the big city, learns to strum awkwardly, clumsily; a cacophony of sound. it takes a full four seasons for her to learn to love the vibrations of nylon strings beneath the pads of her fingers. learns to put herself back together singing acoustic covers and soft little ballads with her face turned up to the stars. puberty comes and goes with her seated on the rickety steps of her porch, strumming nostalgic chords to the ghost of her youth.

her parents say nothing as they watch her from inside the house, smiles wilted, wistful, watery.

(there’s so many things their daughter could be, should be, and hurting, cradling sadness and turning grief into old-timey blues shouldn’t be one of them.)

they leave her be when she starts going to the market in the sticky heat of summer, guitar strapped to her back, playing for small crowds and neighborly regulars. from dusk to dawn, seolhee fixes a soft smile on her face as she strums and strums and strums, voice light and whimsical as she sings requests as a thank you for listening.

she comes home with a straw hat full of notes and red fingers, knowing full well it’s not enough to make up for this month’s expenses. so seolhee ventures back out again, haunts local farmer’s markets and side streets, the sandy beaches during tourist season, trying to make the most of a life that seems to pass her by too quickly, too quietly.

-

sometimes, she tells herself that when she sings something inside of her heals. as if the soft blue notes become a makeshift stopgap measure filling up the gaping hole in her chest, easing the perpetual emptiness, soothing the ache—the want—for a different life.

sometimes, when she closes her eyes, seolhee pretends she doesn’t hear the sound of her parents fighting, the front door slamming, and her mother’s muffled crying.

sometimes, when she lets herself sink in between lyrics about a dreamer wandering away in search for herself—for an adventure—seolhee swears that some day it could all be possible.

THREE.

family is four. then, three. then, two.

home is no longer sand in between her toes and the ocean clinging to her skin, but the veins of seoul—harsher and all concrete jungle. it’s sleek office buildings and cold cityscapes and soon, the roads she used to bike down back home is replaced by honking taxis and the congestion of too many strangers.

home is now a shoebox; a cramped one bedroom apartment on the outskirts of seoul.

FOUR.

school is but a circus and, sometimes, she finds herself center stage. an unwilling spectacle. her accent is the only thing she has left of home and her peers mock her for it. turn her into the punchline of inside jokes and over-the-shoulder remarks about a bumbling seaside girl who doesn’t belong. she’s not ashamed, but it hurts just the same.

so, she keeps to herself, minds her own business, and makes herself at home on the rooftop and the empty bleachers in an emptier field. she has her guitar and her ocean of sounds. starts spending more time with her head down, hair in a loose braid, writing the world and the people she watches and meets down in the pages of secondhand leather-bound notebooks.

-

“you have a pretty voice.”

it’s rooftop prince. only this time, they meet in the middle of the soccer field. it’s seolhee with her guitar in her lap and a curious tilt of her head, one hand shielding her eyes and feeling like she’s looking at the sun. blinded, she looks away. a little embarrassed, a little flattered. it’s been a long time since someone has complimented her, after all.

“why do you sing?”

so i can heal. one day, some day.

seolhee smiles and turns her face up to the sky. “because it feels like i’m home.”

FIVE.

she’s two days shy of her fourteenth birthday when she wraps herself in a chunky sweater and a soft scarf stitched with halmeoni’s love and makes her way to a quiet corner in hongdae with her guitar strapped to her back. braves the bite of an impending winter with numbed fingers and a voice that carries.

she starts with sobangcha and joo hyunmi, hesitant and almost stuttering as she tunes her guitar with nimble fingers and her heart in her throat. somewhere, somehow, she hears halmeoni telling her to be brave as she plucks strings and closes her eyes, petite body swaying to the ebb and flow of a bygone song. with halmeoni in her ear, she lets the world fade away, pays no mind to the small gathering of an audience finding their way to the nostalgic croon of an old soul.

she comes awake to the sound of applause and a case full of clinking coins and a tiny pile of notes. she thanks everyone for their time and sets off to trudge home with her earnings.

she’s pulled from her afterglow by a tap on her shoulder and whirls around to a man in a suit, all coiffed and perfect, voice velvety smooth. her early birthday gift is an invitation that sounds too good to be true.

-

her mother is apprehensive. she’s heard stories about the life of an idol. doesn’t want her daughter to live life under perpetual scrutiny, robbed of her youth, and always struggling to catch up to changing times and new trends.

“you’ll have to give up everything.”

“not everything.“ not you, she means to say. never you.

impending goodbyes has her losing her grip on the impression of a budding city girl society has pressed upon her, slipping back into the soft drawl of dialect and settling right at home in the wake of her desire to chase after a flimsy dream. like this, she’s doe-eyed and wears the heart of a dreamer, curls around her mother like she’s five years old and afraid of the dark.

“i guess this means my baby’s all grown up now.”

am i? doesn’t feel like it. seolhee swallows back a sob and presses her face to her mother’s neck.

goodbye shouldn’t have sounded so definitive. so painful.

SIX.

three years into training and she realizes her voice has stopped being her own, shaped by the company and molded into the image of an innocent girl with the unpolished voice of a would-be angel.

three years and she realizes she’s signed her youth away as dreams of singing on stage with just a microphone and her guitar are replaced by backhanded compliments, veiled sabotage behind closed doors, and a sense of something sacred being stolen from her.

she’s forbidden from ever bringing up a possible solo debut in the future where she can sing about a girl who’s just trying to find her place in the world. the answer is no almost every time. sometimes, if she’s good—when she ranks on top during evaluations, when she ends up being amongst the shortlist of girls for an upcoming girl group—she gets a backhanded maybe. always baited, always rebuffed. lulled into a sense of security with empty promises of what-if’s and what-could’ve-been’s.

three years in and she learns to bite her tongue and does as she’s told. sings what she’s given. dances as she’s practiced. smiles as she’s commanded.

all the while, hours spent in the dead of the night writing lyrics that read like poems, like stories of a thousand lives not yet lived in her notebooks are laid to waste, buried under rejection after rejection in the bottom of a box full of remnants of her childhood and reminders of a home away from home.

like this, she muffles the cries of a girl homesick for a place she’s never been, sings and dances like it’s the only thing that matters and tells herself she’s happy.

tells herself it’s all she wants.

tells herself it’s enough.

(it never is. never will be.)

SEVEN.

lim seolhee is buried—erased—the day she debuts as cherry bomb’s main vocal.

(because lim seolhee is the sunshine girl who looked at people like they hung the moon and the stars. because lim seolhee is tousled hair and tinkling laughter in the middle of the sea. because lim seolhee is made of old songs and picture books, flower crowns, and grass stains.

because lim seolhee is the kind of girl easily broken and taken advantage of.

because lim seolhee, naive and kind, has no place in a world full of backstabbing and desperate survivors trying to make it to the top.

so, she creates herself a persona—someone soft-spoken and unassuming, who seemed unlikely to stab you in the back than she is to hold you while you cried. someone who always seemed a little dazed and absentminded; her gaze faraway, her voice a whisper.

someone like halmeoni—all soft around the edges, always so poised and graceful in her mannerisms (from her mysterious little smile, to the tilt of her head, to the way she walked and talked), her voice a balm to her soul.

she takes all the things she loves most about her and creates a persona in her grandmother’s shadow.

like this, sophia is born to weather all the storms seolhee doesn’t have the strength to handle on her own—just like halmeoni had been there, once upon a time, to hold her hand while she dusted the dirt off her knees and got right back up to face the world.

-

her father calls three days later. when she picks up, all she hears is his rumbling laughter, sounding much fuller than it had in their rickety old house filled with the scent of spices and long-time struggles.

“are you happy? how’s it feel to be on stage?”

like i’m flying. like i’m dying. “how are you, daddy? are you happier now?”

“…yeah, i guess i am, seol-ah. i think i am.”

“that’s good. that’s all i ever wanted—for you to be happy.”

(what she means is—i miss you so much, it hurts. will you come home? will you come back? do you miss me too?)

“i’m proud of you. be good. keep shining, dad will always be by your side.”

don’t lie. don’t lie. don’t lie, she thinks as she cries silent tears and thanks him for everything. for the moments of happiness when she was but a child too curious, too naive, too loving for her own good. for the lifetime of loneliness and always getting left behind when things get too hard—too tough—for people to stay.

“i’m always good.“ always. then and now.

EIGHT.

msg thrives on how easy it is to break her and fit her into a mold of their design, how quickly she can give away her free will for a promise of an adventure (of life never being dull, of living a dream). it’s easy to take a lost little thing in need of guidance and shape her into something otherworldly, push her onto a gnarly road and tell her to simply go straight to find her way back home, to where she needs to be.

but if one were to ask where she’s needed, she thinks of her old childhood home in busan, the pale yellow paint peeling on patches on her ceiling, the glow-in-the-dark wallpaper brittle and gathering dust. thinks of being waist-deep in the sea, thinks of halmeoni in her spongebob apron and a carrot as her makeshift microphone, thinks of her father somewhere (surviving, thriving, happy—she hopes), thinks of her mother and her work-roughened hands and the small shoebox apartment tucked in the tiniest corner of a heartless city.

if one were to ask what it is lim seolhee wants in private, watch her freeze, her smile slipping just slightly off her face—like a deer caught in headlights. watch her eyes, those sad lonely eyes, well up in tears she won’t let spill. watch her closely and carefully as her body seems to curl in on herself—as if the weight of the world is suddenly looming on her shoulders. watch for the tremor when she speaks, fingers twisting at her sides, voice impossibly soft and fragile: i don’t know…no one’s ever asked me before.

and no one has. no one cares either. msg simply takes and so do her fans. everyone breaks off little pieces of her; pieces she willingly gives because she can’t say no—until there’s nothing left for her to give. nothing left for anyone to take.

all that remains is the hollowed out shell of a girl drifting aimlessly, her heart never here or in one place, her mind lingering on faraway places not yet traveled and the sound of ocean waves crashing on sandy shores like a neverending siren’s call.

NINE.

she enters a mid-life crisis at the ripe age of twenty.

the zeroes in her bank account don’t mean anything when all she sees staring back at her in the bathroom mirror is a tired, lonely girl (a skinny, pretty little thing. all hollowed out by time, youth chipping away at the edges), who doesn’t know what she wants. doesn’t know where she belongs or who she is.

so when the stage starts to feel like a burden, she finds a niche on the small screen. makes peace with esoteric scripts and starts creating a name for herself. slowly, she learns to find temporary homes in between lines and in fictional universes. slowly, she finds becoming someone else exhilarating, being on set like stepping into another world. acting becomes second nature—another job; one she actually likes.

but like the stage, the set too becomes another battlefield. people say you won’t get to where you are without ruffling a few feathers or stepping on someone’s toes.

after all, survivors don’t make it to the top without playing a little dirty.

(she learns this the hard way.)

-

mother once told her names were dangerous things—that a girl should remember the names of men who tried to steal her heart, who loved her like she was the only thing that mattered, and who left her all broken, bruised, and ugly. mother tells her it’s the name of men she should be afraid of. the sons of women who lured her in with their heated gazes, their lilting voices, their body full of power. mother warned her that men were dangerous; their names a warning sign—a temptation.

her fall from grace comes as a surprise and at the hands of an up-and-coming actor.

when she meets him, he is boy blue with a heart of gold. all gentle hands and a dirty mouth. their first kiss is a shy affair—all bumping noses and awkward lip grazing—and done in the quiet of his penthouse suite.

they’re on their third date when they’re caught on camera; their rendezvous splashed front page on gossip rags and dispersed on the internet. a tentative relationship captured for all of posterity.

the world explodes. her heart does too.

msg does damage control. spins the fairytale narrative of a love borne between friends. of close encounters, bad timing, and years of pining. the company pins everything on her longstanding image as the sweet girl who would shoulder the world if asked to. pleads for the public, the fans, the media to support this budding romance between two close friends who made it through thick and thin as trainees all those years ago. 

but the damage is done.

the fandom and the public remain divided.

when the hate comments begin to seep through the cracks and makes it way up top, msg realizes what could’ve been a good publicity stunt to garner her more individual branding backfires. realizes they overestimated her value. realizes she’s not quite enough, not quite there. not yet—that her reputation, though pristine prior, could not support the weight of negative public scrutiny and backlash.

so msg pulls her. benches her. gone are the growing piles of scripts and role offers. gone are the ever present promises that she could eventually get that solo she wanted and has begged for year after year.

all that remains are the cyclical group promotions.

prison has a new name and it’s the four pillars that are fame, fortune, reputation, and public perception that traps her within its midst.

2016 begins with a bang and ends with a whimper.

-

she’s twenty-one when he kisses her goodbye the night before their breakup goes public.

she’s twenty-one when the internet reports that they’ve called it quits, lamenting the tragedy of yet another “perfect” couple succumbing to the woes of distance and busy schedules.

she doesn’t cry, doesn’t laugh, doesn’t smile when msg unfreezes her. she says nothing when they warn her to behave and simply nods.

days turn into weeks into months. and, slowly, her heart mends itself. suture by painful suture, scar over invisible scar. healed over by the weight of time and a perpetual kind of numbness that seeps through skin, through muscle, through bone and into her very soul.

like this, she stands back up and trudges on forward—an energizer bunny running on the last dredges of its batteries.

holding out as long as she can. as hard as she can. as always.

TEN.

twenty-three and she’s found herself embarking on a new journey. a new chapter to write.

she’s got a budding acting career ahead. cherry bomb! is still afloat. the road to stardom is long yet, but she’s getting there.

slowly, but surely.

-

deep down—some day, somehow, she prays for anonymity. wants a life shrouded in mystery, no longer talked about in superlatives, made infamous by gossip, speculation, and rumors.

maybe in fifteen years, lim seolhee can be found again in a small town off the coast of some river city. a wanderer, an anomaly amidst a sea of faceless people.

there, a modern-day wraith finally content with her place in the world.

once lost, now found. just a woman. plain and simple.

[apairofcrepeswiththerarestape]

There are few recipes in Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child that offer speed and simplicity, the things that a go go New Yorker such as myself might need in my hectic rat race of a life here in the Big Apple That Never Sleeps. This week I was in need of something like that, I had too much on my plate and plus Westworld came back and so all my extra brainspace was taken up by whether then one robot dude was at the bottom of that lake that maybe the other robot people made (HBO really making people think about male lead characters at the bottom of lakes the last couple of years). So I turned to something easy and relatively quick, PORK CHOPS! But I didn't want to just cook them in the pan because cooking meat in a pan was what I did last week and variety is the spice of life (but please do not use Variety as a spice for cooking, just for all the hottest news in shows business! Also, if you have copies of Variety lying around your house right now please stop reading this! I do not want you as an audience member! Unless you are like an agent or studio person, in that case please keep reading and yes, I am taking meetings right now!). Fortunately there are recipes for pork chops not made in the pan in Mastering the Art of French Cooking by julia Child that do not take a lot of time. Unforch the one I chose did not come out the best! My pork chops were DRY! Not inedibly dry, but after last week's transcendent Steak Au Poivre, it was a disappointment! What was the cause of the dryness? I don't know for sure, there were many possible suspects but I sense that they all contributed in one way or another. And what was this recipe that lead to all this mishegas (oh yeah, I DID use a yiddish word to talk about eating pork, deal with it!)? Casserole-sauteed Pork Chops aka Cotes De Porc Poelees! 

  I went to the fancy store and bought 6 pork chops and then I went to the much much much much much less fancy store in my neighborhood and bought white wine, that was the extent of my shopping. I should speak a little about the much less fancy store where I bought the wine and its level of unfancyness: it was around 5pm on a bright sunny day and I had to be buzzed in by an older polish woman. The customer who came in right behind me was an older dude for whom the owner had a plastic pint bottle of cheap vodka waiting for. When she asked if that's what he wanted he wheezed out a yes like he was entering a water fountain store from the driest desert (this is my entry into a Raymond Chandler write alike contest, how'd I do?). It was very bleak and without the pleasing touches of other bleak liquor stores of my past, like the constant strobe light illuminating the bottle of vodka shaped like an AK-47 in the window of store that was by my partner's old apartment. Anyway, this was the easiest shopping I've done, outside of the buzzer that I couldn't hear because I had my headphones in and so the old polish lady who ran the liquor store did not like me. 

After my short but dread filled shopping excursion I got my chops home and got to the work of making my pork chops too dry. Coincidentally the first thing I did was take the pork chops out of their paper and dry them off with paper towels (I've had to dry off a lot of meat since I started this project and every time I'm instructed to do so with paper towels, it's like this book was sponsored by both Big Butter AND Big Paper Towel) I'm certain that this was not what made my pork drops too dry. I then preheated my oven to 325, a setting that does not exist on my oven's knob, so I just had to eyeball what I thought was the exact middle between the 300 and 350 settings. Yes, I realize I should just get an in-oven thermometer but we had one in our last apartment and I left it there and that's a real block for me. This lack of oven acuity is certainly a possible culprit in the crime of my dry pork chops. Then I heated up some 4 tablespoons of oil in my trusty dutch oven, in this case it was grapeseed oil because I've been harangued by three people now about how using olive oil is very bad for me and seriously fine I'll try it. I did not notice a taste difference but I also haven't noticed a difference in my health either, but that may be due non oil based factors, like eating two pork chops for dinner and then a third one for lunch the next day. Though it probably had nothing to do with pork chop dryness I may or may not have blamed the oil a little bit, probably because I don't like getting harangued and I transferred my feelings about the haranguing onto the oil itself. Can you tell I took one semester of psychology in college?  I browned my pork chops in the almost certainly innocent oil for 4 minutes on each side then set them on a cutting board. 

Next I seasoned the chops with a little bit of salt and pepper. Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child did not give an exact measurement for these so I just kind of like waved my cylinder of sea salt over the chops and then gave each of them like three cranks of the pepper grinder. I also seasoned each of them with 1/4 teaspoon of sage for flavor and to make sure that I dispelled any bad spirits in my oven (j/k I don't believe in any of that stuff! The world is a cruel random place that pays no heed to your made up rituals but if you want to burn some leaves in your living room because you had a bad roommate go for it!). I did this because I did not have time to give these chops a proper marinade, my jet set lifestyle as no time for marinades, not when I'm busy riding a train for an hour so I can rehearse for a sketch comedy show that will draw 30 people. Was the lack of a marinade what made my chops dry (but not too dry, I want to reiterate, these pork chops were perfectly passable)? Maybe. After I did this I dumped all the hot oil and fat out of the dutch oven and replaced it with 2 tablespoons of butter and two halved garlic cloves. I then returned the 6 pork chops to the cooking vessel. Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child instructs to "overlap them slightly" but in my case there was a lot of overlapping so maybe that's want made them dry? Possibly. I basted the stacked chops with the butter then covered them and put them in my perhaps inaccurately heated oven for 30 minutes. I interrupted their heating once to turn and baste the chops though Julia Child suggests doing so "once or twice" and this is DEFINITELY something I thought about when biting into a very good but certainly a little dry pork chop. When the 30 minutes were up I removed the dutch oven, removed the pork chops from the dutch oven, and dumped out almost all, save for around 2 tablespoons, all the leftover liquid. I poured in a half cup of white wine that I bought from the very bleak liquor store and heated, scraping up all leftover cooking bits, till there was about a 1/2 cup of stuff total and that was my sauce.

Like I've said a thousand times in this entry, THE PORK CHOPS WERE A LITTLE DRY FOR MY TASTE. Though I have brought up many suspects, I'm pretty sure it was the oven that did it, so guess what I'm getting this week? A DING DANG OVEN THERMOMETER! The sauce helped a little but look sometimes you get the wet pork chop and sometime the wet pork chop gets you. Should you make pork chops this way? Maybe. Will I ever make pork chops this way again? CERTAINLY NOT! Perhaps one of the variations to this recipe that appear in Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child might offer some cover if your chops end up a little too dry but this master recipe is a no go solo! So for the first time I have to say DON'T make Casserole-sauteed Pork Chops aka Cotes de Porc Poelees! Make something else! See you next week!

#tdandjulia #casserolesauteedporkchops #cotesdeporcpoelees #justalittletoodry #westworld #whitedudesinlakes #raymondchandlertryouts #ak47fullofvodka #bigpapertowel #oilharanguing #inaccurateovens #projection #sageburning #wouldnotmakeagain