#you simply cannot complain about not having enough of A or B or C and then never reblog / interact with the content you love.

[magnusbae]

To illustrate this post by @mayahawkse I would like to visualize to you the difference:

A post in 2023:

A post in 2014:

A zoom out of the same post:

This is what a community looks like.

See how in 2023 almost all of the reblogs come from the OP, from their few hours/days in the tag search. Meanwhile in 2014 the % of reblogs from OP is insignificant, because most of the reblogs come from the reblogs within the fandom, within the micro-communities formed there. You didn't need to rely on tags, or search, or being featured. Because the community took care of you, made sure to pass the work between themselves and onto their blog and exposed their followers to it. It kept works alive for years.

It's not JUST the reblog/like ratio that causing this issue, it's the type of interaction people have. They're content with scrolling and liking the search engine, instead of actually having a reblogging relationship with other blogs in their community.

Anyways, if you want to see more content you like, the only true way to make it happen is to reblog it. Likes do not forward content in no way but making OP feel nice. Reblogs on the other hand make content eternal. They make it relevant, they make it exist outside of a fickle tumblr search that hardly works on the best of days.

If you want more of something, reblog it.

[lawchwan]

love alphabet (sanji)

summary: just another alphabet for our favorite perverted romantic chef

disclaimer: there are some spoilers of skypiea and Whole Cake Island in some alphabets so be warn with that. and obviously some alphabets have nsfw content.

crossposted on ao3

A = Affection (PDA, what sort of affection they give)

You are talking to the king of PDA. If you’re someone who cannot handle pda, then you need to start handling it with Sanji. He loves to be hands-on with you, literally, declaring to the entire world how much you mean to him. This man just outright loves you, and he’s not shy of showcasing it.

Bonus: he loves to be extra in front of Zoro, just to rub it in his face, only to get a groan and an eye roll of disgust from him (and the entire straw hats really, even Luffy couldn’t stand it)

B = Babies (Anything you want about babies)

“Oh, you want babies? Say less, ma’am, I’ll throw all the condoms and contraceptives away. When and where and I’ll give it to you” he says, with heart eyes and nosebleed as you mentioned in passing about babies.

In all seriousness, Sanji does have a soft spot for kids. He is a very gentle man and often really caring towards kids. If you remember at the end of enies lobby, the way he handled Chimney with such care after her exclaiming about how hungry she is how I imagined he’d be with his own kid, and maybe even extra doting and caring. Also chopper and Sanji’s interaction during skypiea… I don’t think I need to add more… (Although Chopper is 17 years old/was 15 during skypiea, it still applies)

C = Cuddles (How they cuddle or are cuddled)

Oh that man loves to cuddle. He may not be the most fleshy, he does however have the warmth that can counteract as a blanket and that’s enough of you. He, like law in my previous love alphabet, loves to be the small spoon, except he is more open about and doesn’t care about one says about it.

D = Darling  (Pet names) 

He’ll throw in any affectionate nicknames that he could think of at the top of his head and will say it with no shame. But I do think he’s the type to say “darling,” “my love,” “my sweet,” and “angel.”

He also has more pet names/nicknames in the bedroom and calls you goddess and mommy. He one time slipped up and called you mommy in front of Zoro, and Zoro mocked him for all eternity until you confronted him… : )

E = Enamored (how hard do they fall when in love)

It's Sanji we’re talking about… this man will lay his eyes on any woman and he’ll fall head over heels. But when it comes to you, there’s a slightly subtle change. While he still maintains his chivalry and flirtatious act, he does put in extra effort with you. If he makes Nami and Robin a parfait, then you’ll get extra toppings and flavors of your liking. Honestly, their food would start looking underwhelming next to yours, but it's not that they’re complaining. Matter of fact, they, mainly Nami, thank you for having reciprocal feelings since Sanji hasn’t been going at either woman.   

F = Firsts (A first on anything you pick)

The first time Sanji cooked for you was special. You were sitting in the kitchen, alone with him, as you happened to catch a case of “midnight hunger,” and there he was, a handsome cook cleaning the dishes as he hums to himself. When you made your presence known, the blond man turned with his usual charismatic smile and turned the sink before doing so.

“hey, (y/n) darling, what are you doing here?”

He seemed genuinely to be ecstatic to see you in the kitchen, even though it was god-awful late at night, he didn’t seem bothered for some reason. You were about to mention how hungry you were, until the grumble of your stomach spoke for you, only for you to look away, flustered. Sanji simply chuckled as he stated sweetly, “I guess I know why…”

And there you were, as much as you didn’t want to wear him out, he was very insistent and ended up cooking up something upon your request. You just sat there, ogling at the cook as he worked his magic. You stare at his hands, veins popping up handsomely due to the force he is exerting, whether through cutting vegetables or holding onto the sizzling pan, as you place your head onto your hand. You didn’t say much to not distract him, but, man oh man, was he attractive just cooking for you.

“oh, how I wish those hands were on me…” you thought to yourself as you began analyzing his physique with your eyes wandering from his blond locks to his tiny yet built waist, down to his thick ass. Your head was heading to perverted places where you might need a quick shower afterward.

He seemed to have noticed that you were staring at him, so as he finished with his finishing touch, he began declaring, “Voila!”  as he handed you the dish. You were brought back to reality after he spoke up, and you looked down at your dish.

“Oh, wow does that look good,” you say, softly yet excitedly. He just shrugged and hummed with a confident smile before handing your utensils. As you had your first bite, you closed your eyes as you moaned in glee; you truly never doubted him when it came to food because that was perhaps the most delicious dish you ever had. He simply just looked at you admirably, as he mimicked your look towards him when you saw him cook, even down to the head-on-chin position.

Once you were done, you sighed and let out a phew due to your fullness. “How’d you like it?” Sanji spoke up with a smile as he took your plate.

“That was amazing, Sanji… Thank you so much,” You say with gratitude as you hold his face with one hand, and he leaned against it. He mirrored you, only this time he leaned in before he wiped the corner of your lips the remaining sauce while he maintained eye contact.

“Missed a spot,” he whispered to you before licking his finger, winking, and taking the plate to the sink. He then had his back to you with a smirk while you looked at him in awe.

God, does this man drive you crazy…

G = Good Morning (How do they wake you up)

You best believe that you’ll be getting your morning kisses daily from him. If he wakes up before you, he’ll just lift himself and stare at you with love sparkle all over his blue eyes, he’ll probably even run his fingernail against your skin before kissing you awake. He’ll paint that beautiful smile as he says with his gentle morning voice, “Good morning, sunshine.”

That’s on his lazy days though, other days, however, he might just wake you up with breakfast in bed. He’ll set aside the tray before he gently shakes you until you wake up and informs you that he made you breakfast.

He is such a romantic, it warms one’s cold heart.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs?)

His hugs are so warm… I don’t know what else to add. He just adds a layer of comfort to him, just like his cuddles.

I = In Labor (Labour and Delivery)

He’s an absolute mess and honestly, you might have considered kicking him out during delivery. It’s not that he’s a dick about it or whatever—matter of fact, poor dude’s just trying to help—, but he’s acting like he’s the one giving birth due to his nervousness and is making you feel worse about the situation. If he wasn’t your love and/or the father of your child, you’d have kicked him out and had Zoro or Robin fill the role for support (you’ve thought of Nami as well, but she’d probably be squeamish and leave the room).

And once that child’s out, he’ll probably cry at the sight of your beautiful creation and kiss you on the top of your head while he praises you and compliments the beautiful bundle of joy.

“You did it… You’re so amazing,”

J = Jealousy (Are they jealous? How do they handle it?)

And the winner of the most hypocritical individual award goes to; Blackleg Sanji. You might have to beat him for it, because how the fuck is he allowed to flirt with other women, yet he beats men whom you’ve given the same energy?

All jokes aside, this man will probably glare at the person who’s attempting to get closer to you. He’ll probably start causing chaos if anyone were to lay a hand on his partner and he doesn’t care, he’ll stop when the one who gets the beat down promises he won’t look at you again.

K = Kisses (How do they kiss? How often?)

You finally understood the addiction to nicotine when you first pressed your lips against his. No matter a peck or a full-on passionate, his lips were simply addicting and you just crave them every time you look at him. He places a cigarette on his lips, and you envy the tip of the cigarette for it is covered by his lips when it should be your skin that is covered by his lips.

He kisses you very often, maybe a little bit too often, disgustingly often. But he’ll tone it down if you ask, and he’ll give you kisses throughout the day, he can never leave a day with no kisses for you.

L = Loyal (How loyal are they?)

Contrary to popular belief—and the jokes I’ve been making earlier—, Sanji’s pretty loyal. Sure, he may flirt with multiple women, which is a bad habit, but he never thought of sleeping with them now that he’s with you. He mainly claims it as just acts of chivalry, but truly he never intends on coming off as overtly flirtatious nor does he have any intentions of cheating on you, and he will always find a way to prove it.

M = Memory (Their favourite memory about you?)

The first time you declared your love for him. Underneath that charismatic aura, Sanji’s a broken man who believes that love is not by his side. Sure, he is aware that he has platonic, or rather familial love from the straw hat crew, Zeff, and the workers at Baratie, but he never would have thought that he’d find genuine romantic love and he was on his journey of accepting that.

Until you came along and ruined it, and Sanji couldn’t have been more grateful that you did. When you two happened to be kissing each other after an intimate session, you held him and uttered those three words, only for him to be gasping and widen his eyes in astonishment.

“What?”

You looked at him with a loving smile and holding onto his delicate face, “I love you, Sanji…”

You made Sanji’s heart flutter as he looked at you with glossy eyes and he laid on your chest and you began stroking his locks. You didn’t want him to respond if he didn’t want to, you simply just wanted to let him know, only for you to hear a whisper,

“I love you too…”

N = Never! (Dealbreakers)

Never mention his biological father, and don’t you ever try to reunite them. Sanji considers Zeff as his real dad, he taught and treated him like a father would to his son, so if you’d reunite them, he’d be over the moon. Reunite him with Judge and Sanji will feel betrayed that you would put him in a room with his abuser.

No amount of “but you guys are family” will cut it.

O = On the Rocks (How do they make up?)

Sanji’s the type to apologize through meals. He’ll obviously talk to you, but no matter how mad he is/you are, he’ll not leave you hungry. You two will start apologizing to each other and admit your mistakes. The one thing you love about Sanji is that he respects you too much for you to be upset, even if you’re in the wrong.

So you’ll simply just talk it out and kiss afterward… which may lead to more action if you get my drift.

P = Playtime (Any headcanons on sex)

Sanji loves to call you goddess/god, no matter if he’s domming or subbing. He just loves the thought of worshipping you and gliding his tongue all over his skin.

He also enjoys giving you oral or fingering you, doesn’t matter where you guys are, he’ll always find a way to have a taste of you, claiming “It’s the best flavor I’ve ever tried.”

Q = Quiet Time (How do they wind down?)

The perfect wind-down for Sanji is simply cuddling in bed or cooking alone with you. Sure, it may seem very cliché, but Sanji’s a cliché man and he knows it, especially when you call him out on it, but he doesn’t care.

What better way to spend some quiet time than when you have your partner with you, am I right?

R = Rapture (What makes them happy?)

When you value him and remind him how loved and important he is. Given his childhood, it is easy for him to slip through the mindset of self-loathing and ending himself, which resulted in his sacrificial personality. While you were never a cure for it, you did help him ease through those tough times, and he grew to appreciate you for your effort and how you don’t perceive the way others do.

Your overall love and appreciation for him means so much to him, thus resulting in making him happy.

S = Soulmate (What do they think of soulmates?)

Oh, he hands down believes in soulmates. First off, he’s a Pisces, and every Pisces I’ve met believes in soulmates. Secondly, he is a romantic at heart, soul, and body so he believes that there’s someone out there that will complete his soul.

T = Together (What do you like to do together?)

Cooking, of course, and also shopping. This man will go broke for you and he’ll be happy to go into debt for you, as long as you are happy and content, please, by all means, make his pockets hurt (but you won't because you love him too much to ever go through that).

U = Unyielding (How do they handle interlopers on the relationship?)

Sanji will karate kick them on their way out. “How dare you to try to meddle in OUR perfect. Beautiful, loving relationship?! Who gave you the absolute right to try and take my sweet partner away?! I’ll beat you to a pulp!” Sanji would exclaim as he proceeded to ambush the person who tried to interlope.

V = Vulnerable (Are they vulnerable often? How do they handle it?)

Sanji would not be as vulnerable as you’d think when you first met. Sure, he’s very emotional in tune and can hold you days on end when you just want to cry out about whatever’s bothering you, past or present.

Just like Law, once he gains trust, that’s when the floodgates are open and he starts becoming vulnerable and talking about his trauma. Please hug him and promise you won’t throw him under the bus with all of that, he needs emotional support and love.

W = Wedding (Wedding headcanons)

He’ll make sure he’ll make your wedding a day you won’t ever forget. I imagine your guys’ wedding being extravagant yet still intimate, inviting only the straw hat crew—yes including Zoro—, Vivi, Zeff, and most of his workers of Baratie from his end. He made sure you had some cake testing before the wedding and was mostly in charge of the catering, despite it being his wedding day.

Despite you were the bride, Sanji was more of a bridezilla than you were, and you had your fair share of freak outs, but not to the extend of Sanji’s to which you had to calm him down. Eventually, however, everything was settled—thanks to you and the rest of the straw hat—and you had a beautiful wedding by the beach.

(idk he seems like someone who would want a beach wedding.)

X = (E)x (How do they handle exes? What do they do if they see them)

He’d act the same with interlopers when it comes to your ex, especially if that ex had done unimaginable heinous things to you.

Meanwhile, his exes might have to run away because otherwise, he’ll start acting “too friendly,” and may slip up a few details about their previous relationship, which results in you being insecure.

He eventually apologizes, genuinely avoids his ex, and never interacts with them.

Y = Yearning (What do they do when they miss you?)

Another pillow sniffer and clothes (panties) stealer. Yup, that’s it, nothing else to add there. Just read my law’s one and just switch law with Sanji and you’ll get the same effect.

While he’s always snatching your pillows and clothes when you’re away, whenever he’s in the kitchen, he’ll even cook your favorite food to remind him of you. Even though he cooked it himself, he can’t help but be reminded of you and your sparkling eyes of joy when you see him cook your favorite meal.

NSFW

 He loves your enthusiasm so damn much, and God does he crave to see it again, especially when you have that similar sparkle when he undresses in front of you and showcases his pink-tipped cock to you.

Where were those panties when he needed them?

Z = Zzz… (Sleeping headcanons)

He loves it when you guys are in spooning positions. While he prefers being the small spoon, he loves to wrap himself around you with your chest on his. The feeling of you being snug beside him makes him feel like he can protect you and there’s no better feeling than that.

characters are owned by oda. i will not tolerate nor accept translation, reposts on other websites, or plagiarism. divider made by mmadeinheavenn.

[irrealisms]

c!Tommy is annoying (and that’s important)

I have... a lot of feelings about c!Tommy in s2, from the start of the exile conflict through the Green Festival. I also think the fandom tends to mischaracterize him--I know I’m guilty of this, and as a c!Tommy lover I’ll be mostly addressing a thing that I and other people who love his character don’t focus on as much--which makes me sad because the aspects of his character that tend to get glossed over are also some of the ones that are most personally meaningful to me. (rest of the post is /rp, because “c!” gets annoying to type.)

Specifically: Tommy is loud. He’s abrasive. He’s annoying. He threatens, he griefs, he steals. He lies, blatantly, all the time. He tends to be self-centered (despite being deeply selfless). He lashes out at people who are trying to help him.

He is, in short, a bad victim.

And this is precisely what makes him vulnerable. 

Some people on the server were opposed to and sad about exile, sure. But a lot of people? Thought it was funny, that it was natural consequences, that it was deserved. Sapnap came and laughed, Technoblade came and laughed, Lazar came and laughed, Quackity came and laughed. Now, we don’t know what would have happened if Ranboo was the one being isolated and abused; maybe it would be the same. But I don’t think it would have been. A lot of characters have issues with Tommy or simply find him unpleasant to be around, and I would imagine that a significant number of them were probably, on some level, kind of relieved that he wasn’t their problem anymore. To be clear, I don’t entirely blame them for this! Tommy is... a lot, and they (mostly) didn’t know the full extent of what Tommy was going through. Even those of them that tried to visit with good intentions often got their gifts burned and called “pity gifts”, got insulted or yelled at by Tommy, etc.--or in Jack Manifold’s case, actually killed! The first time I watched the leadup to exile arc, I found Tommy difficult to sympathize with at first--he lied to L’Manberg before his trial; he refused to cooperate with probation while he was on it, even though Tubbo was pushing for it as an alternative to exile; at the beginning of exile, he would sometimes log on to visitors, drive them away, and then complain that he was lonely. As much as it’s obviously ultimately Dream’s fault, it’s easy to look at Tommy and not feel much sympathy for his position or feel that it’s partially self-made. It’s easy for outsiders to look at a Tommy who isn’t stealing, isn’t griefing, who is comparatively quieter, who isn’t their problem anymore, and be relieved rather than concerned. 

Exile arc makes it obvious that they’re wrong.

(Incidentally, I have a lot of sympathy for what Dream’s going through in the prison.)

And not only are they wrong, but exile makes the consequences of this painfully, horrifyingly clear: the abuse gets worse, Tommy gets more and more depressed, and at the climax of it all Tommy attempts suicide. 

(Although notably to me, he’s not the stereotypical victim during exile arc, either--he doesn’t cry on stream, he’s still trying to make dumb jokes, he’s not strategic, he refuses to listen to people, he switches wildly between fight and fawn responses without much correlation with who he’s talking to or how he’s being treated.)

Tommy’s recovery arc, after all of this, starts with him stealing valuables from Technoblade, building a secret basement underneath the existing basements, and then loudly asserting that it’s his house and Technoblade is trespassing.

I could talk about how these things are rooted in trauma. I could talk about how his constant eating of golden apples comes after a period of food insecurity, appetite/disordered eating problems, and physical abuse. I could talk about how he’s regained some of his energy after a period of depression but has nowhere to let it out in a small basement room. I could talk about how he repeatedly annoys Technoblade--quite probably the best PVPer on the server--perhaps in part as a test of how far he can go before he gets abused again, and in part as a sign that he feels safe enough to be annoying without being abused.

But that’s... not the heart of it, at least not to me. The heart of it is that before exile, Tommy would have stolen from Technoblade without a second’s thought, and during exile, Tommy didn’t steal from Technoblade because “Dream wouldn’t like it”, and afterwards, he steals from Technoblade again. 

Sure, he’s being annoying. But more importantly, he’s being himself again. Before exile, I might have rolled my eyes, because Technoblade worked for those potions and golden apples and armor and so on, and Tommy’s totally ruining his chest organization system. After exile? I cheered. Tommy’s being Tommy again. And, yeah, that means that he’s being annoying, he’s stealing, he’s ruining dramatic moments. So what? None of that stuff is actually all that bad, in the grand scheme of things. He’s not depressed, he’s not suicidal, he’s not being abused. He’s a teenager and he’s having fun. Technoblade will tease him for it, but he won’t hit Tommy, won’t take his stuff, won’t threaten him, won’t isolate him any further. That’s what a proportionate response to finding Tommy annoying looks like: teasing. 

I’d also like to address one more thing, which... I couldn’t figure out how to fit in the rest of the post, but it felt incomplete without it. Right before the meeting that ends with Tommy pulling out Spirit, Tommy asks everyone what the plan is, and is basically told that the plan is for him to be quiet. He says “you guys, please, for the love of God, you know I’ve watched for this long, I’m not going to be quiet.” He reiterates this throughout the conversation: he can try to be quiet, but it is not, ultimately, as easy for him as “be quiet”. This is also the source of Tubbo’s anger at him-- Tommy can’t do “one simple thing” for him. I’m not claiming Tommy is neurodivergent, but... as a neurodivergent person, Tommy repeatedly saying “I cannot do this thing that is simple for you, I can’t, empirically every time we have tried this in the past it has failed, if you make more plans based on that then they will also fail, have you met me” and having this seen as evidence of me not caring or trying... resonated with me. Which isn’t to say it’s not a flaw--almost all character traits can be flaws in the right (or, well, wrong) situations--but it does show that Tommy has some level of self-awareness about his flaws, which is something I appreciate about him, and it frustrates me when that goes unacknowledged. Tommy knows he’s annoying. He jokes about it. But he can’t actually... turn it off. Whether or not he should (and I would argue that he shouldn’t have to) isn’t even in question: he can’t. This is who he is. The only time we see him less loud and more capable of being obedient is exile, when he’s severely depressed and being abused. That’s fascinating to me, as a character trait!

In my experience, there’s a specific archetype of abuse victims in fiction that is... overrepresented. I can’t quite find the words to talk about it in a way that doesn’t technically include Tommy, but... the ways Tommy is important to me is the ways that (a) he doesn’t fit that archetype (b) not fitting that archetype makes him more vulnerable to abuse. He’s not always easy for other characters to talk to or sympathize with... which makes him uniquely easy to isolate and victim blame. That’s important. I think I tend to downplay Tommy’s annoying tendencies because I want to emphasize his sympathetic traits, and that’s fine, but it’s important to me that... Tommy’s a victim, and he’s annoying. Annoying people can be victims just as much as shy rule-followers can. Not only that: Tommy’s a victim in part because he’s annoying. Him being annoying is a risk factor for abuse, not an excuse for it.

[imagineyourworld-old]

NSFW Alphabet with Wolffe

Wolffe x Fem!Reader 

Warnings: Smut (obviously), mentions of injuries

-------

A = Aftercare (What are they like after sex)

After sex Wolffe is a puppy (sorry for the pun). He makes sure that you’re alright, gets you a glass of water and urges you to pee afterwards (he knows it is important for your health down there). If the two of you are not too tired he just loves taking a bath with you, just holding you close, shampooing your hair and whispering sweet nothings in your ear. 

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Wolffe loves your lips! How soft they are against his, how pink and plush they look after kissing or when he bites them (he also adores when you bite them when you’re nervous or thinking), the marks they leave on him and how good they feel on every single part of his body. 

As for himself, I feel like Wolffe would be proud of his arms/shoulders, especially whenever he gets to hold you close he loves knowing that he is strong enough to protect you (even if you don’t need him to) or carry you to the bedroom when you’re in the mood. 

C = Cum  (Anything to do with cum, basically)

Whether he has pulled out and spread his seed on them or some of it tickled out of you, Wolffe loves seeing your thighs covered in his cum. And he loves licking it off of them. 

And as mentioned before he loves your lips, so seeing even just a single drop of his cum on them is a close second favourite. 

D = Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Wolffe would love to watch you touch yourself to the thought of him. You’ve told him that you’ve done it before, but at that moment he was too surprised to go further into the topic. One day though, he promises himself, he will ask you if he can watch. 

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Not crazy experienced, but he knows what he’s doing. Wolffe is a very closed off and private person, so he doesn’t just jump into bed with anyone, but there have been times (before you were together of course) where he went home with someone after a night out.

F = Favourite position (This goes without saying)

Wolffe’s not picky, he’s fine with whatever feels best for you. But oh boy does he get off on seeing the expressions on your face when he’s deep inside you, so basically any position in which he can see your face (and kiss your lips) is his favourite. 

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc)

He is a pretty serious person in general, so he’s not exactly goofy in bed, but that doesn’t mean he is opposed to laughing every now and then. The first time you laughed, however, had him feeling incredibly insecure until you explained that you weren’t laughing at him. 

H = Hair (How well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc)

Wolffe is a pretty tidy guy, so he keeps his hair groomed, but not entirely shaved off. 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

It may be surprising, but during sex Wolffe can be a real romantic. He wants to make sure that you’re feeling fine, that you’re taken care of and your pleasure always comes first. But even though it’s rare, sometimes he can be rough and have his way with you (as long as you agree of course), but as soon as he’s finished he’ll take care of your needs. 

J = Jack off (Mastrubation headcanon)

Before he met you Wolffe just didn’t understand the appeal of mastrubating. But now, when he thinks of you, he sometimes can’t help but sneak off to his private quarters or the shower and get off to the thought of you. 

There was this one time you sent him a spicy holo and let’s just say he spent some time alone after that. 

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

One word: Cockwarming. Some days he enjoys having you so close, being one with you and knowing that you only do this for him and no one else. Some days he likes to tease you, make you all hot and bothered by giving you the bare minimum, but keeping you stuffed full of him all the same.  

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Since Wolffe is a pretty private person it should come as no surprise that he prefers the privacy of your bedroom, he’s fine with your living room as well, but the bedroom simply gives the two of you more space and a comfier setting. 

He’d never say no to taking you back to his room (let’s just say he has a private room, ok?), but prefers your place, because there he feels completely off duty and there his brothers or general won’t interrupt whatever you get up to. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on? What gets them going?)

Quite a few things, actually. Let’s just make a list, shall we? 

Since he loves your lips seeing you wearing a new or bright shade of lipstick, using a straw, licking or biting your lips or anything else that draws attention to your lips has him hooked. 

Catching a glimpse at hickies he left on you just make him want to do it (and you) all over again.

Soft kisses to his collarbone or the place where his neck meets his shoulder always leave him wanting more. 

Seeing you in either lingerie or his blacks usually has him half hard from the sight alone.   

N = No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

While he loves leaving hickies everywhere, Wolffe would never leave any other kind of mark on you. He might be projecting a bit, but he remembers the pain when he lost his eye and got his scar, and is sometimes still self conscious about it, so he would hate leaving even the slightest scratch or bite mark. 

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skills, etc)

Wolffe enjoys both giving and receiving, but gun to his head he would have to say he prefers receiving. Not only because he gets to see your lips, swollen from kissing and him biting them, wrapped around his cock, but also because he gets to lick the last drops of his cum off your lips and taste himself on your tongue. 

But when it comes to giving he is so skilled, it’s ridiculous. If asked you’d say he is even better with his tongue and fingers than he is with his dick. 

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc)

His life is hectic, so when the two of you have time he tries his best to make use of that time with soft and slow love making. Wolffe enjoys touching and kissing every part of your body, teasing you and committing every part of you to memory for when you have to part ways again. 

Some days, though, when he is especially stressed or needy or you have been teasing him a bit too much, Wolffe wastes no time getting both himself and you off. 

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc)

He’s not a big fan, but sometimes there is just no other way. Maybe you have been teasing him too much, maybe you haven’t gotten alone time for a while, maybe he just needs to know that you’re there and you’re his for a moment.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc)

Here we need to differentiate: While Wolffe is down to experimenting and finding new ways to pleasure you (and for you to find new ways to pleasure him), but he’s not a risk taker. Anything that might get you hurt or end up in the two of you getting caught in the act is off the table. 

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last)

Not exceptional, but not disappointing either. He can usually go for two, maybe three, rounds in a row, and know how to make them last. If you’re planning on a long night however, he’ll have to take some breaks, during which he’ll put his hands and tongue to good use, so you’re not complaining. 

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner of themselves?)

He’s not a fan, but not opposed either. 

So far you haven’t used any toys in your love making, but he knows you use them when he’s not around, which makes him kinda curious. He won’t bring the topic up unless you do though, and that has nothing to do with the fact that he might be a slight bit scared, nothing at all. 

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

Wolffe never teases you in public, but once the two of you are behind closed doors he constantly has his hands on you, sometimes he just wants to cuddle, but sometimes he wants to get you riled up. Maybe he whispers something in your ear, his husky voice making even the most innocent words sound dirty, maybe he lets his hands roam your body and squeeze your boobs or thighs, maybe he even slips his hand inside your trousers, whatever he chooses to do that day, you know you’ll end up in the bedroom. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc)

While he’s usually pretty quiet he lets out soft whimpers whenever you hit a sweet spot. And on the rare occasion that he is frustrated, either because you won’t do as he says or you won’t let him do what he wants, he actually growls, much like the animal he named himself after. 

W = Wild card (Random headcanon for the character)

Wolffe is usually a dom, but on the rare occasion the two of you decide to switch it up he’s the whiniest, most impatient sub there is. Since he usually cannot refuse any orders in his day to day life he loves disobeying you to the point where it can be frustrating and you’re close to giving up and letting him take over. He won’t let it go that far, however, because even though he’d never admit it (at least not while sober) he loves it when you take control and do as you please. 

X = X-ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s a soldier, so he’s strong and muscular. 

Down there Wolffe is long, but not exactly longer than average. He is quite thick though, so when he’s inside you he really stretches you out. 

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Wolffe’s sex drive is not crazy high, which he is glad of since there’s a war going on and you can’t just jump at each other whenever one of you feels like it. But there are a few rare days when he feels like he’d go crazy if he can’t have you right that moment. 

-------

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

No matter how tired Wolffe is, he always makes sure you’re alright before he even thinks about sleeping. Once you are taken care of, and preferably laying in his arms, however, he falls right asleep. Wolffe doesn’t get much sleep and he never sleeps better than with you in his arms. 

I’ve wanted to write an NSFW alphabet for quite a while now, because I feel like it’s a good entry point to writing smut, but most of the characters I wanted to write for already have hundreds of these, so when I couldn’t find one for Wolffe I knew my time had come. 

As I said, this is my first time writing smut and also my first time writing for Wolffe, so please excuse any mistakes. 

[cacoetheswriting]

nsfw alphabet - berlin

A/N: (request): The title says it all so a smut warning is in place.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex?)

Believe it or not Berlin, or should you say Andrés, is quite affectionate after sex. He’ll press his body closely against yours and place intimate soft kisses across your collarbone. He’ll ask if you enjoyed yourself, if you need anything. However  most of all he likes to listen to you whispering words of affirmation. Knowing how much he means to you makes Berlin feel better about himself.

B = Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Berlin’s favourite body part of yours is most definitely your ass. He loves how it looks in jeans, skirts, that red jumpsuit, but most of all he likes it bare. He’ll grab, caress, clasp and knead the flesh when you’re having sex - smack it when he can, even in public. 

When it comes to himself however he doesn't have a favourite body part per-say - anything he can use to pleasure you really. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum basically)

He loves to come inside of you, of course. His cock pumping deep until he explodes and the white extract drips slowly down your thigh mixing with your own wetness. Although what he enjoys most of all is erupting in your mouth. Sometimes when he feels his own climax nearing he’ll pull out of your dripping pussy, climb up to straddle your face and plunge his wet hard-on into your mouth. It doesn't take long for the first shot of his cum to blast against the back of your throat - the gooey soo coating your tongue, filling your mouth completely and eventually being forced out between your lips. 

D = Dirty Secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Berlin secretly enjoys watching other people hit on you. There is something about the way you react, casually flirting back just to see if he'd get jealous, that gets his motor running. Of course he uses that drive to punish you for such flirtations the second he gets you alone.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

To say he's experienced would be an understatement, however, his sexual maturity is not what makes him so skilled at pleasuring you. Berlin took his time exploring your likes and dislikes in bed very early into your relationship. He can read your body like a map, knows where you’re most delicate and exactly what buttons to press to get you going. 

F = Favourite Position (this goes without saying)

As much as he revels in power play and taking charge in bed, there is something about the cowgirl position that Berlin cannot say no to. He loves the feeling of you kneeling on top and pushing off his chest as you slide up and down. His hands exploring your body freely, groping your ass, fingers pulling on your nipples. Not to mention how incredibly hot you look. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

Definitely more on the serious side. He’ll tease you to assert power and make the infrequent dirty joke however overall Berlin is more somber when you’re in bed and focused on making you feel good rather than making you laugh. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He doesn’t really care about what he looks like down there. Occasionally he will clean himself up but it’s very rare. Not that you complain; in your opinion it makes him look more manly. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Berlin is not the romantic type. He enjoys being close to you and will shower you with affection but after sex rather than during.

J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)

He is not ashamed to admit he jacks off frequently; it is human nature after all. What he prefers though is to masturbate with you - usually as a form of foreplay. He’ll order you to pleasure yourself and watch you intensively and pumping his hard cock while you rub your clit. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

The dark haired thief very much has a BDSM kink. He doesn't get to act on it often but when he does, well it is safe to say you have trouble walking the next day.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

Anywhere and everywhere - you don't even have to be alone as long as you can be discreet. The mere thought of your naked body rubbing against his is enough to get him going, and once he’s turned on he simply must have you. It doesn't matter where you are; or who's around.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

A better question would be what doesn't get him going. Berlin gets turned on just by looking at you. There have been times even where he’d be looking at an object such as a table and his mind would wonder - how he’d love to bend you over that and have his way. 

N = NO (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Even though he doesn't mind other people flirting with you, a big no no is sharing you with anyone. You are his and his alone therefore threesomes or group sex is definitely off the table. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc,)

Receiving - and damn are you good at that. He loves looking down at you as your sweet lips are wrapped around his erect member. The sensation he gets as your tongue slides over his cock while you suck on the head. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He likes to pound you asserting dominance and power. Fingertips digging into your waist, his mouth kissing yours, he enjoys fucking you fast barely giving you a chance to breathe. Although when he wants to he can go slow, mainly to tease you are quite simply admire your beauty. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

It would be safe to say that he prefers quickies to conventional sex. He revels in the fact he can have you whenever he wants to; fuck you shamelessly leaving you breathless, legs quaking. Of course if the two of you have more time to spare he’ll pleasure you slowly, properly. Taking you bit by bit.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

As long as what he wants to try is okay with you, anything is fair game. He would never do anything to hurt you purposefully or make you uncomfortable therefore even though he is the dominant in your relationship, you need to approve whatever it is he’d like to do to you. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Usually one or two, maybe even three - depending how long and taxing each round is. 

T = Toy (do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He is a proud owner of a few toys from various vibrators, handcuffs, spanking paddles, and even nipple clamps. He doesn't use them often, but when he does he makes you feel things you have never felt before. His favourite little toy to use on you is a remote controlled vibrator - pretty self explanatory. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Berlin is quite the tease although no bigger than you. In your relationship, you are the one that acts like a brat, petering and tormenting him. You know exactly which buttons to push to turn him on to the point of no return. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’ll mainly talk dirty to you, whisper all of the things he’s going to do to you, call you ‘his slut’ because he knows how hot and bothered that gets you. 

W = Wild Card (random headcanon for the character)

Despite his brooding and dominant exterior, Andrés is tender and compassionate. He always puts you first. Your comfort and safety are of utmost importance to him. He’ll hold your hand, embrace you when you least expect it, and listen to everything you have to say. He’s a great listener.

X = X-Ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants)

Perhaps the biggest you’ve been with. He’s quite thick, and stretches you out well hitting all of the right spots. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Remarkably high. It surprised you at first because you wouldn't have expected it from the older brooding thief but you’ve come to appreciate and definitely enjoy it. 

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He’ll wait for you to fall asleep first; like a true gentleman. Once your eyes are closed and he can hear your soft elegant snores, he’ll snuggle even closer to you taking in your scent and drift to sleep with you safely in his arms.

-

[ibijau]

I saw a post about, not sure where god!lxc fic goes next? I assume nhs insists on going back to the cave to make a proper offering. Lxc accompanies b/c nhs is still a little sick and nmj is busy. Nhs continues panicking about this uber-powerful god. Lxc enjoys the offering, it's nice, but not the panicking, and hey he committed to being honest? so he tells nhs he's the god. This does not have the calming effect he was hoping for --the anon who got super excited about god!lxc can't read sideplot

ok so, didn’t quite use all of that, but big thanks anon for giving me a way to at least write a little more on that AU which is very dear to me

Price of Wishes on AO3 (can’t remember my tumblr tag for it... orz)

Lan Xichen stares at the altar.

It is a small one, hurriedly installed among others inside the Unclean Realm. Its only decoration is a bolt of pale embroidered fabric from which Nie Huaisang apparently once wanted to have a robe made, and a portrait of Lan Xichen that Nie Huaisang personally painted, as promised in the temple. It doesn’t look like Lan Xichen does in this mortal form, and it probably doesn’t look the way he once did as a god, but the main attributes of his last remaining statue are there.

How long has it been since he was granted a new altar? Not since before this Nie sect even came to be, he thinks.

And now not only was he given this altar, but there are offerings on it. Nie Huaisang put incense to burn and offered flowers and rice, yes, but surprisingly others did the same, and thanked Lan Xichen for keeping their young master safe when he ran away. Even the stern Nie Mingjue, who clearly didn’t share his brother’s certainty about a godly intervention, still lit up some incense and bowed before the altar, simply because he realised how much it mattered to Nie Huaisang.

It had been a flight of fancy to help that boy and get him into the temple, just a sudden impulse to feel like a real god again, but Lan Xichen finds himself more than rewarded for this kindness. If he can keep this up, if they continue honouring him, he might well survive a century more.

Lan Xichen had forgotten what hope feels like.

But hope or not, Lan Xichen knows to whom he owes this. As days pass, he sticks close to Nie Huaisang, who is currently his strongest believer. Even the old lady, dear to Lan Xichen as she is, never had such unwavering faith in his power. She prays to him mostly out of habit, while Nie Huaisang does so out of conviction. Being near him feels like stepping into the sun after an eternity in darkness, and Lan Xichen cannot get enough of the sensation.

Besides, if they are to be married, he needs to know more about the young man whose life he will share.

Nie Huaisang is an interesting person, Lan Xichen thinks. He acts a little spoiled, but of course he is young, and Lan Xichen vaguely understands that the Nie family has gone through rough times in the recent past, and Nie Huaisang’s childishness might be how he dealt with it. At his core, Nie Huaisang is more serious than he lets on. For example, he is determined to fully repay the debt he contracted toward Lan Xichen. The altar he set up is but a first step. In spite of his brother’s warnings, Nie Huaisang has inquired what it would cost to have a safe road to the mountain temple, just as he promised to do. In fact, he goes beyond his promise, determined to find every possible detail about Lan Xichen so that he may be worshipped properly. To that end, he spends day after day in Qinghe Nie’s immensely rich library, reading through books with a speed which astonishes Lan Xichen, writing letters to make inquiries as if it is the easiest thing in the world.

Lan Xichen thinks Nie Huaisang might just be the cleverest person he has ever met, and the most stubborn as well. Both are qualities he appreciates in a follower, and in a person.

It’s quite funny to Lan Xichen to realise that Nie Huaisang is considered lazy. Perhaps he only puts efforts into things that interest him. Lan Xichen, of course, is glad to be one of those things.

In general, he’s just glad to be around Nie Huaisang. The steady warmth of belief is quite nice, of course, but that’s not the only reason. Nie Huaisang, although he apparently realises to some degree that Lan Xichen shouldn’t exist as a mortal, still tries hard to be kind to him. He gives him delicious foods, and tries to find subtle ways to look for gaps in Lan Xichen’s knowledge of the mortal world so he can fill him in and help him fit in better. He is a pleasant person to talk to, a pleasant person to silently spend time with, a pleasant person to look at even, his youthful face showing every sign that he will develop into a handsome man someday.

In just this little time, Lan Xichen finds himself quite fond of this little mortal. It won’t be unpleasant to marry him as agreed.

First, though, Nie Huaisang must mature. And part of that means heading out toward the Cloud Recesses, where Lan Xichen himself is supposed to come from, according to the narrative Nie Huaisang demanded in his prayer. It is a stressful perspective, since Lan Xichen isn’t sure he is quite strong enough to shift reality around people who have much stronger reasons to refuse his intrusion into their life, but he will try his best. It is the deal he made with Nie Huaisang, and he will see it through.

To Lan Xichen’s relief, just before they are set to head south toward Gusu, Nie Huaisang begs his brother for a full ceremony at the mountain temple, with incense and prayers and everything that can be done to honour Lan Xichen. Nie Mingjue grumbles and complains and even gets angry, but he eventually gives in, as seems to be common for him when his brother makes a request. Nie Mingjue is a wise man, and he apparently understands that little can be done when Nie Huaisang is in a mood to be stubborn about something.

So the three of them head out into the mountain, followed by a few Nie disciples who carry food offerings and some tools to clean the temple.

The temple’s floors are swiped clean. Rubbles are removed. The nearly faceless statue has its layers of dust carefully cleaned away by Nie Huaisang who climbed on its pedestal so he can reach every part, revealing details that Lan Xichen himself had forgotten. There are even some traces of colour here and there.

“I’ll have to make another portrait,” Nie Huaisang notes. “Mine isn’t accurate at all after all.”

“I’m sure this god is already more than happy with what you have given him,” Lan Xichen says, lifting his gaze from the altar he’s wiping clean. It is a struggle to keep himself from crying from joy, and his voice comes out a little strangled, but Nie Huaisang doesn’t appear to notice.

“I need to do better,” Nie Huaisang says with a shiver. “I cannot risk offending him.”

He sounds almost afraid, and his hands tremble slightly as he carefully dusts the statue. Lan Xichen stares at him a moment more, and sighs.

However pleasant everything else has been, this is one thing that doesn’t sit right with him. For whatever reason, Nie Huaisang seems to be afraid of his god self, and it taints his every prayer. This doesn’t change the value of those prayers, it doesn’t make his belief any less strong and valuable, but Lan Xichen can feel that fear almost constantly and he doesn’t enjoy it. He is too used to the old lady’s belief, simple and companionable. She treats him like an old friend to whom she can make requests, and he wishes Nie Huaisang would do the same. They are set to be married, it is the deal, and Lan Xichen doesn’t like the idea of a union set in fear. 

“I am sure that god would not be offended,” Lan Xichen quietly insists. “You haven’t found anything about him in all your books and your letters, have you? So he must not be a very important god, and your efforts are sure to have been noticed and appreciated.”

“But it’s not enough,” Nie Huaisang retorts, gritting his teeth. “It can’t be enough. Nothing I do is ever enough, there’s got to be more I could do!”

Lan Xichen frowns, and looks around until his eyes land on Nie Mingjue. He heard this, and is staring at his brother with some concern.

From what Lan Xichen understands, the reason Nie Huaisang took refuge in his temple a few weeks ago was because of a great argument with Nie Mingjue regarding his capacity to do… nearly anything, really. Nie Mingjue, taking Lan Xichen as the confident Nie Huaisang asked that he be, admitted to him one day that he is terribly worried for his brother’s future. There might be a war, he said, and Nie Mingjue could die in it and leave Nie Huaisang alone to lead their sect before his time. Nie Mingjue confessed he is terrified that the elders of their clan won’t respect Nie Huaisang because his mother was of lesser birth, that some of their cousins will attempt to rob him of his birthright, that even if he becomes sect leader he will not be respected and some people will try to take advantage of his inexperience. So Nie Mingjue pushes his brother as hard as he can, demanding more efforts, more results, but it is all in vain because Nie Huaisang has stubbornly decided he isn’t good at anything that matters, and refuses to try anymore.

It was a terrible argument they had that day, Nie Mingjue said. And then, proving all his fears right, Nie Huaisang nearly died after running away and catching a fever, showing to all his future enemies how vulnerable a target he would be without Nie Mingjue to protect him. At the same time, that Nie Huaisang was ready to run away showed that he took it to heart every time he was scolded for not doing more, and now Nie Mingjue doesn’t know how to handle him anymore.

After Nie Mingjue confided in him this way, Lan Xichen promised he would look after Nie Huaisang, no matter what. It is part of the deal, as far as he’s concerned, because spouses must support one another, but also…

Lan Xichen is quickly becoming quite fond of this pair of brothers. Having been lonely for so long, he finds joy in the closeness they share, no matter how strained it might be at times. It is clear to him that Nie Mingjue loves his brother, though he struggles to show it when he has so much on his mind, and Nie Huaisang feels the same, to the point it was inconceivable for him to marry someone who wouldn’t be friendly with Nie Mingjue.

“Nie gongzi, you’ve done all you could for that statue,” Lan Xichen says, grabbing Nie Huaisang by the waist and pulling him down from the pedestal.

Nie Huaisang squeaks in surprise, fighting for a second before going rigid with fear as Lan Xichen puts him down. His face is a bright crimson when he looks up at Lan Xichen, who wonders whether that’s anger at being manhandled this way, but the other Nie just start laughing at his expression.

“Don’t seduce my brother like that, Xichen,” Nie Mingjue scolds, more of a joke than a real warning. “Look at him, he’s two heartbeat from asking for your hand now.”

Amazingly, Nie Huaisang manages to blush an even brighter colour, and leaps away from Lan Xichen. Nie Mingjue laughs again, apparently content with his brother’s perceived crush. Perceived, or real. Lan Xichen isn’t really sure what goes on in Nie Huaisang’s mind. He can feel is never ending flood of belief, the undercurrent of fear, but no particular affection so far. Then again, with fear that strong, it would be hard for any other emotion to flourish. Lan Xichen hasn’t wanted to talk directly about their situation yet, assuming that Nie Huaisang might want the illusion that this is all perfectly normal, but he’s rethinking that strategy. It is clear that Nie Huaisang, for whatever reason, is immune to the narrative that Lan Xichen created for his sake, so why not talk about it openly? If it can make Nie Huaisang any less afraid…

That is a problem for later. Right now, the temple is as clean as can be achieved with what little time they have available, so Nie Mingjue conducts the ceremonies necessary to consecrate the temple again, and invites Lan Xichen to inhabit again this place dedicated to him. Incense is put to burn for him, offerings are left on the altar, thanks and prayers are presented to him. Even Nie Mingjue, so openly reluctant to believe that there was any divine intervention to help his brother survive in the mountain, does provide a small stream of belief, hinting at a mind just as strong as his brother’s. Lan Xichen hopes that they can truly become friends over time, though he is unsure that’s possible with the lies he’s had to weave so he could fulfill Nie Huaisang’s request.

Still, there’s no harm in trying. If Lan Xichen is to spend one lifetime as a mortal, he wants to make the best of it, not only as a god in need of believers, but also as a person left alone far too long.

[mahizli]

Coming Back Down (Kix & Obi-Wan, 20 BBY)

Part 15 of ‘Sparks of Hope, A Star-Wars Advent-Calendar’

***

“The kriff, Master…”

General Skywalker’s annoyed words echoed from the medical fresher, topping the sound of water, and Kix sighed, eyes tracing the dirty trail of mud and blood leading to the shower.

It had been hard to distinguish any feature, let alone injury, under the layer of grime and blood and dirt covering General Kenobi’s face. The mission had gone completely sideways after barely a day on the planet – thanks to a rockslide where General Kenobi had once more felt obliged to save half the regiment by Force-pushing the men along with General Skywalker out of the avalanche. Getting knocked off the mountainside and half buried under rocks himself. And staying that way for about twelve hours, because of course it had been night, making them unable to see and search for him properly.

General Skywalker had been frantic. But to be honest, Kix preferred frantic to the hot, angry way he had acted ever since General Kenobi had returned from his mission as Rako Hardeen. Himself and the vode had felt between a rock and a hard place for weeks now, and seeing their General finally display something else than fury towards General Kenobi had felt reassuring in a sad, very odd way.

Of course, said General had been the one literally caught under rocks – he had been conscious though, if not truly lucid, once they had found him, lips moving silently, mouthing words Kix couldn’t understand at first. Kenobi’s hair was matted with blood but, though the Jedi had obviously been sick several times, the eyes staring up at Kix and Skywalker had been bright.

“My charms are overthrown”, Kenobi had been whispering, oblivious to Skywalker’s hand meeting his face. “What s-strength I have’s m-mine own…”

“Master, hang on, let me lift those rocks…”

Kenobi had just shuddered, letting out a quiet moan as Kix checked his pupils, muttering on: “Which is most faint; now t’is true, I m-must be here r-released b-by you…”

Kenobi had been trembling when Kix had finally been able to assess his body – field-scans were not the most precise, but the General must have managed to shield his body from the worst of the impact. He had a severe concussion, a broken collarbone and forearm, huge bruises on the chest and legs, hypothermia… and Force-exhaustion, according to General Skywalker.

General Kenobi tended towards downplaying his injuries, shielding himself behind sarcasm or joking. Even on Geonosis, he had always answered Kix questions clearly while hurt, his command on the Force enough to help him push through blood-loss and pain.

Here, however, General Kenobi had let Skywalker gather him in his arms like a child, mumbling incoherent words, without a sign of recognition. They had got him back to the ship as quickly as possible, and Kix had run a more thorough scan, fortunately confirming there was no inner injury.

He had allowed Skywalker to drag Kenobi to the showers, stabilizing him through the Force, and was determined to get the General clothed, lying down and monitored within minutes – but the quiet water sound and humming he was hearing did not look like anything but trouble.

“Master, stop splashing around!”

Kix entered the showers to find an exasperated and quite damp General Skywalker holding a very wet General Kenobi, who had been stripped down to his briefs and was sitting down on the ground, hair plastered on his head by the shower-spray, uninjured hand running quietly through the stream, pushing water towards the drain.

“Raindrops f-falling on my head”, General Kenobi was singing, sputtering slightly as water met his chin. “But t-that doesn’t mean my eyes will soon be t-turning red… Crying’s not for me…”

Kenobi looked up at Kix and smiled, with an expression of childish glee so unlike him he winced. The water was brownish under him, the General sported various bruises and scratches, chest in an interesting hue of blue-green – but Kenobi simply smiled.

“’Cause I’m never gonna stop the rain by c-complaining”, Kenobi sang, pitch and rhythm undisturbed by the water streaming on his body and face.

“He threw up twice, Kix. And he’s getting quite warm. He keeps singing and splashing like a kid!”

“General…”, Kix said, crouching before Kenobi, turning off the water and wrapping a towel around him. “General, can you hear me?”

The motion seemed to rouse Kenobi, who stopped singing and looked up at Kix, wincing slightly, grey eyes squinting in the light.

“Can you tell me your name?”

Kenobi’s hand moved, clutching the towel, wet head leaning against Skywalker’s shoulder in trusting, abandoning move that made Skywalker stiffen, then wrap an arm around Kenobi’s trembling shoulders.

“Obi… Obi-Wan K-Kenobi.”

“Very good. And can you tell me who you are?”, Kix asked, gently.

The General blinked, rubbing a bare foot against the wet tiles.

“I’m Master Jinn’s Padawan?”

The voice was thin, the question mark plain at the end. The General was getting pale and blinking, too, cheek leaning against Skywalker’s arm.

“Come on, Master…”, Skywalker urged him, keeping his arm still and placing a hand on Kenobi’s bouncing knee. “Shh… It’s alright. You can do this.

- I’m… ah… I’m… I have a… a Padawan.”

Kenobi was frowning now, face scrunched up with pain and paling even further.

“And a G-Grand- Padawan. Anakin a-and Ahsoka. I’m a… I’m a… w-what am I, I’m a… I’m not sure… I’m… tired.”

Kix met Skywalker’s eyes and found his worry mirrored there, because General Kenobi never ever complained and never got confused. The hot skin and the relentless throwing up could be explained by the concussion, and yet…

“Let’s get him into a proper cot”, Kix ordered, and together with Skywalker, they helped General Kenobi up, into clean medical scrubs and lying down.

All along, the General stayed pliant and blinking, not even wincing when Kit placed an infusion line on the back of his hand.

“Do you know who I am, sir?”, Kix asked him, gently parting his wet hair to assess the head-wound he had quickly stapled on the field, and that looked clean enough to reassure him.

Kenobi’s face scrunched up once more, and after a few seconds of silence, Kix noticed a small drop of blood falling from his nose towards his lips.

“Shh, Master. No use of the Force for you. Not now… You can’t.”

Skywalker wiped the drop of blood away, with uncharacteristic gentleness, and Kenobi shuddered, eyes fluttering shut, features going lax as sleep claimed him, face tilting towards his former Padawan and friend.

It was then they noticed the two pin-shaped bruises on Kenobi’s neck.

“Stims…”, Skywalker sighed. “Of course. I couldn’t believe he was still conscious when we found him.”

“That one is older, though”, Kix observed, gently tilting Kenobi’s head to assess the skin better. “And there is another, on the other side.”

“You mean…”

Skywalker’s face turned dark as he frowned – and Kix felt his own chest tighten, because it all made sense, suddenly. General Kenobi’s alertness and quick reflexes, during the expedition, despite his previous lack of sleep and food – Kix knew, of course, but he was a medic and Kenobi a Jedi.

Nothing to be done.

“He took them before the mission?”

Skywalker looked slightly sick himself, now, and Kix sighed, taking Kenobi’s temperature and blood-pressure, inserting a saline bag on the infusion line.

“So it would seem”, he answered. “And I think he injected himself with another below that rock. Which, to be honest, was the right thing to do – but with all those stims it explains his confusion and the fever. He has to sleep it off and let his body get rid of them – since he cannot use the Force for a while.”

“Why would he do such a thing? Obi-Wan never uses stims when he can help it!”

Skywalker sounded upset and Kenobi made a soft sound in his sleep, a thin frown appearing between his eyes. Skywalker looked down, and ran his thumb across that worried line, watching it smoothen, shoulders dropping slowly.

“He’s not alright, is he? He’s…”

“No”, Kix said, very softly. “I think he is pushing himself. I think he tries to make up. For… you know.”

“That stupid, kriffing idiot”, Skywalker said, but there was no anger in his voice, just sadness. “I never asked that of him. Quite the contrary, Kix. I wish… I wish he could draw limits. But he can’t.”

The dark frown was back, and Kix sighed, placing General Kenobi’s hand back on the covers.

“Then perhaps we should help him. As we did, before…”

Skywalker let out a breath, and then he placed a hand in Kenobi’s hair, combing through the auburn strands until they fell back properly on his forehead once more.

“Perhaps, Kix.”

He watched his former Master sleep, for a while, emotions battling on his face, and then the frown vanished, some lightness returning on his young features, and Skywalker looked up, a small smirk around his lips.

“He has a fine singing voice, though…”

And, because of that smile, Kix let Skywalker sit next to his Master, fiddling with a small radio device. And when Kenobi woke up, after a few hours, still exhausted and confused, but less feverish, Kix pretended he did not hear Skywalker ask him if he knew the song playing.

“It’s a nice one, quite a success on Coruscant, listen to this: I’ve been hyp-no-tized, by the lights! Come on, Master, sing along, I know you can… But I’m coming home…”

Skywalker’s voice was slightly off-pitch, but warm and strong. It made Kenobi smile softly and turn his face towards him.

“I’m coming back down tonight”, he whispered, grey eyes searching for Skywalker’s, who never stopped looking at him, and let out a slight laugh.

“You’d better, Master. You’re high as a kitten.”

Kenobi just blinked. There was more colour to his cheeks, a gleam in his eyes that was not there before, and that had nothing to do with stims. And Kix knew that, somehow, he would be alright, now.

He left them to their song and quiet vigil, closing the door behind him.

They would be alright.

[citrucentric]

Cranberry

The ideal Holmes is tall and dark with sharp edges and an intelligent look to him, but also posh and with a sense that you could fold him into origami if you really tried. Dresses well, but wouldn’t look out of place sprawled dramatically over a couch in a dressing gown with a pipe and surrounded by drug paraphernalia. Once made a pillow fort and sat in it to think. Caught somewhere between handsome, pretty, and weird looking. Emphasis can be on any of the three. CANNOT have facial hair.

Holmes Adaptations

S-Tier

Miss Sherlock (Yuko Takeuchi) - 95%

You’ll notice, of course, that nowhere in the earlier description did I say Holmes needed to be white, a man, or even human. None of those qualifiers or the lack-thereof prevent someone from looking the part -- it simply becomes necessary to compare them to the characters around them. And when I picture a female Sherlock Holmes, Yuko Takeuchi embodies the exact image in my mind. Her sharp edges, piercing eyes, and impeccable fashion, along with the powerful weird energy she brings to the role, fit Sherlock perfectly. She does look more than a bit like she could kick my ass, but more in the manner she dominates the room, which is perfect for the character.

Sherlock Holmes (Jeremy Brett) - 85%

I haven’t watched this adaptation, though I’ve been meaning to get around to it. So this ranking is based solely on screenshots and promotional images. And honestly, as ugly as i find this guy, he totally nails it. He even kind of looks like the illustrations in the stories. I won’t give him a perfect score because his hair could be darker and his face is a little small, and there’s just barely something missing. But as far as “canon” Holmes adaptations go, he’s the cream of the crop.

A-Tier

Sherlock: The Abominable Bride (Benedict Cumberbatch) - 80%

Definitely the more accurate of the two Cumberbatch Holmes designs, the sleek fashion and slicked back hair complement Cumberbatch’s angular build and “somewhere between pretty and just weird” face. He’s tall, dark, and posh. If there’s anything holding him back it’s simply that even dressed up properly, there’s something still a bit modern looking about him.

Fate/Grand Order - 78%

Given that his design and presentation are a direct reference to both Brett and Cumberbatch’s portrayals, it’s a given he’d place so highly. It’s really hard to nail down a 2D Holmes, especially in the anime style this game employs, since it has a tendency to prettify characters by default. True to form, FGO Holmes is far neater and more precise than I’d like. But he’s by no means a bad design, and depending on the image he can really hit the spot for me; he’s definitely a chart topper in the realm of 2D Holmes.

Sherlock Holmes: The Furtive Festivity (Gregory Johnstone) - 75%

There aren’t many Holmes that we only get to see as an old man, in no small part due to the ACD estate’s notoriously malicious copyright practices. Johnstone ranks so highly not due necessarily to the details of his look, but the overall feel he embodies. This Holmes is soft, affectionate, more than a little floppy. His hair and costume portray a man well grown into his eccentric life, and his face is sharp and mature enough to suggest the brains underneath; even if that’s more wisdom than intelligence in this particular story. This is a Holmes designed by someone who really loves Sherlock Holmes, and it definitely shows.

BBC Sherlock (Benedict Cumberbatch) - 75%

Cumberbatch’s features still naturally suit Holmes well, and he’s tall and striking enough to cover the rest. But this isn’t a rating of his acting performance aside from the visuals it supplies; it’s hard to modernize Holmes, especially since it makes perfect sense for Holmes to gel well with the changing times; he was always a man ahead of his era. BBC Holmes’s trademark trenchcoat and curly locks aren’t traditional Holmes, but they suit him well enough.

Yuukoku no Moriarty - 73%

The long hair is an unorthodox take, but I'm certainly not complaining. YnM's Holmes definitely nails the youthful scientific exuberance of an early Holmes. It's clear they were going for a sort of BBC/ACD mix, but with their own spin. Pretty -- he is an anime boy, after all -- but all sharp edges and full of energy. Decent, way better than most anime Holmes designs manage.

B-Tier

Basil of Baker Street [The Great Mouse Detective] - 70%

Comparing the character to those around them is especially important when it comes to non-human characters, who naturally don’t have the same features. Putting Basil next to Dawson makes this abundantly clear, as they make a perfect portrait of Holmes and Watson. For a mouse, he’s thin, angular, even a little ratlike; all decisions that suit Holmes well. I have some complaints about his ensemble, though; while the dressing gown suits him well, his normal brown coat and hat don’t work so well with his fur; the monochrome look makes him come off a bit scruffy and unrefined.

A Study in Black - 68%

Rules are made to be broken, they say; here’s a Holmes with well maintained facial hair and who’s shorter than Watson, and yet I can without question say they were the right decisions. This Holmes takes a very different design approach than any other on this list, even the other modern takes, but he embodies the spirit of Holmes much more than if he’d tried to match every detail. Holmes is still gaunt and striking, eccentric and fashionable. He looks absolutely great.

The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes (Robert Stephens) - 62%

Stephens in this role is, I have to say, far too soft. But he’s playing a different sort of Holmes, and I can’t resist keeping him here. There are some parts of the look he has down; he certainly looks high class, and the softer elements of Holmes’ character look good on him. Holmes’ traditional costume, the hat and coat, look out of place on him. But that suits the message of the film, and may very well have been intentional.

C-Tier

Dai Gyakuten Saiban - 58%

Not the only blond Holmes on this list, but it doesn’t suit him as poorly. From a character design standpoint, it looks very good. As a Holmes, it’s unorthodox. He’s not gonna be a chart topper with it, but I wouldn’t rule it out. This Holmes’ real problem isn’t his coloration, merely that he’s much too conventionally attractive. His jaw is a bit too wide, curls a bit too lovely, the peek of lavender under his coat a bit too rich, and I can’t look at him for too long without blushing. Do some cocaine and get back to me.

Sherlock Holmes (Basil Rathbone) - 55%

Now, this one might be controversial. I don’t think Rathbone Holmes looks very good. I can’t put my finger on why; his head is the right shape, his nose very sharp, though his face looks very smooth and he seems overall vaguely packed in. Like he was plucked out of the sky just before walking on set. The shapes are all right, it just seems off to me. I guess what I’m getting is that his look is too obviously produced. He looks too much like an actor portraying Holmes, rather than Holmes. But I know he’s gonna be the guy a lot of people swear by, so I won’t defend this placement too hard.

Sherlock Hound - 45%

Really, what is up with the monochrome design on some of these cartoons. Sherlock Hound has the darker hat to make up for it, though, so it’s a little better. Applying the same rubric as Basil to him... doesn’t get the same results. As far as I can tell, this just looks like a normal dog. And a scruffy light-furred one, at that. There’s a contrast between him and Watson, sure, but it could’ve been pushed further. At the end of the day this is an average guy dressed as Sherlock.

D-Tier

Herlock Sholmes [Code: Realize] - 40%

This is a very pretty anime boy. I’d pick him first in whatever dating sim this is. ...Wait, this is supposed to be Holmes? How can you tell? Look, I know it’s hard to make an anime boy Holmes. Holmes’ key design elements aren’t his costume or his hair, they’re the things that make him unpolished. And anime dating sim boys don’t like to be unpolished. But really, this is just a steampunk boy who likes tea. Nothing here reads as Holmes to me.

Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey Jr.) - 35%

Now, I love this movie. RDJ got me back into Sherlock Holmes when I was younger. And as this character, he has a very specific and well designed look. ...Does that look gel with canon Holmes? I don’t think so. He’s rough, he’s scruffy, he’s short and wide and strong-jawed, and he refuses to go for a clean shave. I like him a lot, but he’s not very Holmesian. He does, however, nail the eccentricity and his costume design works for him well. I do like a messy Holmes. So I won’t go any lower than this.

F-Tier

Basil [Blush Blush] - 28%

So, he’s got the outfit. There’s that. But otherwise... This is just some soft ugly anime boy cosplaying Sherlock Holmes. He doesn’t have a single trait that works in his favor. On top of that, he’s got the same problem the other Basil on this list had -- the all monochrome light brown just looks weird, and not Holmesian at all. And this boy doesn’t have the excuse of literally being a mouse. This is just an ugly design.

Elementary (Jonny Lee Miller) - 25%

Now, I've only watched a few scattered episodes of Elementary. Partially because I'm morally opposed to shows that only gender-flip half of the duo, partially because I’m absolutely outraged by the travesty they made Moriarty. But this isn’t a bad character, per-se.

But, like, this is just some dude. This isn't Holmes.

Sherlock Holmes [Clue] - 23%

I love Clue so much. That probably doesn’t surprise anyone. I have the season pass in this game, which automatically gives me every DLC character they add for free. So I was super excited to hear there was gonna be a Sherlock crossover. ...But this is just ugly. Another light haired square-jawed monochrome asshole pretending to be my favorite character. There’s nothing Holmes about this. (The rest of the designs in the pack are no better, but this isn’t about them.)

Skylar Holmes [Blossom Detective Holmes] - 20%

Now, Blossom Detective is a show that I famously disliked so much I immediately sat down and screenwrote my own Holmes cartoon on the spot. And Skylar certainly feels like she should be in the “part 2″ of this list, but a Holmes she is.

She's cute and she accessorizes well, but she's just not Sherlock Holmes by any stretch.

Sherlock Shellingford [Milky Holmes] - 10%

Now, look how cute she is! Sherlock Shellingford, present and accounted for. She’s got TWO Sherlock names so you know she’s the real deal. Now, this is just an objectively good design. She's exactly what she needs to be to serve the role she plays!

And that isn't Sherlock Holmes. Sorry.

Holmes & Watson (Will Ferrell) - 0%

Get out of my house.

Holmes Archetypes

Not all Holmes’ are meant to be the Canonical Sherlock Holmes, of course; some are just neat references, or characters who naturally fit into his role whether the author intended it or not. Let’s address them here, and remember that not looking the part doesn’t really reflect negatively on these ones as they’re stand-alone.

S-Tier

Dylan Reinhart [Instinct] (Alan Cumming) - 90%

Dylan is so point for point Sherlock Holmes that it’s hard to call him an archetype and not a straight adaptation, or possibly a rip-off if I’m being harsh. But I’m not supposed to be rating him by portrayal, just looks - and he’s really good. He’s the exact right blend of weird looking, though not as angular as he should be. His sharp eyebrows and nose and high hairline work fantastic, and he wears a suit very well. He’s a perfect little bundle of posh and nerves, and though he’s not perfect the fact that this isn’t actually supposed to be canon Sherlock Holmes makes this placement very unsurprising. He wouldn’t look out of place on the other list.

Hubert von Vestra [Fire Emblem: Three Houses] - 85%

Oh? What’s that? You don’t think Hubert von Vestra is a Sherlock Holmes archetype? Okay, then explain to me why he uses the word “sentiment” exactly twice in his supports. Atheists 1, Church of Seiros 0. Anyway. Let’s start with the obvious. Hubert looks like Benedict Cumberbatch. But, he looks like a vampire Benedict Cumberbatch who did a lot more cocaine. And if you don’t think Sherlock Holmes should look like a vampire, youre lying.

A-Tier

None yet. Please submit your Holmes and I will add them.

B-Tier

Heinwald [Dragalia Lost] - 67%

I would never look at this design and think "well, that's Sherlock Holmes". Heinwald looks more like a zombie or the bride of Frankenstein, very Halloween. His look being so specific does come at the expense of his Holmesness, but he's still got more than a few traits down and he’s an absolute treat.

L Lawliet [Death Note] - 65%

This is a very, very weird looking man. Key points: dark hair and eyes. gaunt, sharp, and mostly angular (though with a softer face). Extremely foldable. This man could 100% pass for Holmes, if someone else was dressing him. Put him in a suit, comb his hair? Yeah. It’d really work. But until then, he’s just most of the way there.

Kyoko Kirigiri [Danganronpa] - 63%

Kirigiri really gets jilted here, because she could be much higher. Unfortunately, she has to be part of a series that with only a few exceptions just reuses the same face and body for most of its female characters. Kirigiri definitely has the sharp and focused feel she needs to pass for Holmes, and she dresses well. The white hair is the opposite of the dark he usually touts, but it’s striking. Unfortunately, put her next to any other character in her series, and she blends back in.

Miles Edgeworth [Ace Attorney] - 60%

Feels a little weird to put Edgeworth on here when the actual Sherlock Holmes is in his game, but he fits the character much better if not the narrative role. So let’s go over the looks. His jaw is a bit wide, but he’s very pointy, and I certainly have never gotten the impression he’s a physically strong man. He’s very fashionable, and with his big cravat and sharp hair he makes a cutting silhouette. I’d say he needs a bit more to really nail the look, though.

C-Tier

Will Graham [Hannibal] (Hugh Dancy) - 45%

Despite being a noted Hannibal Lecter fan and possible homosexual, I still haven’t watched Hannibal. I’m taking people at their word that Will is a Sherlock; I definitely would have assumed otherwise looking at him. He reminds me deeply of BBC’s John Watson, and it’s hard to see anything else. But I don’t hate his look; he reads as clever, he looks good in darks, and I wouldn’t complain to see him cast as Holmes. He’s better than some of the lower-tiered canon Holmes actors, anyway.

Ranpo Edogawa [Bungo Stray Dogs] - 40%

This is another submission, and I don’t know who this boy is. I really doubt he’s actually a Holmes, given that he’s named after a real non-Doyle writer, but I was begged to include him. Let’s go. I really like his outfit. He’s got an aesthetic I like. Is it Holmes’? No. This kid looks like he’d fit way better as a Baker Street Irregular; maybe he should audition.

D-Tier

Gregory House (Hugh Laurie) - 35%

Take everything I said for Robert Downey Jr, and just mess up his hair a bit more. House is scruffy, poorly put together, and not wearing anything that costs over $100. As a Holmes, he’d work as one of his disguises; I wouldn’t be super surprised if this guy suddenly cleaned up and looked the part -- but it would take a lot of cleaning. I love his look, though -- again, he isn’t trying to be canon. House is an explicit Holmes parallel, but he’s still his own character.

F-Tier

Walnut Cookie [Cookie Run] - 20%

Given how much “Holmes costume” and “Detective costume” are conflated, it’s possible this gingerbread baby isn’t even supposed to be a Holmes reference, but I’ll take her. She’s an excellent design - but a standalone one. Shes too soft, warm, and curly looking to pull off canon Holmes.

[purgatoryandme]

Hey, I mean this as innocently as possible but aren't characters supposed to be complex? I mean if characters are a barely and not well hidden walking talking propaganda of a certain theme or idea, isn't that bad writing? It's possible I'm not completely understanding what you mean when you say you don't like people who say 'they're complex characters', so is there any way you can explain further? Also if you don't wanna respond and if this is rude in any way, please ignore this.

NO! This is like...the biggest quibble I have with internet meta creation and fandom at large!!!! Not every character needs to be complex, some works are better off without complex characters, and, most importantly:  Complexity isn’t the hallmark of a talented writer!!! AHHHH!!!!! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So first, what is a complex character? According to tumblr, it seems to be somebody who is either a) a character with conflicting motivations, b) a character with a very detailed backstory, c) a character that evokes sympathy through their realistic experiencing of certain events/situations, or d) a character they are going to say has all these things but is really just blank enough to be relatable in a way that lets people fill in those details themselves with their own experiences. You’ll notice that these are not the same things, though some can go hand in hand. This is the first issue with the conceptualization of complex characters. Fact of the matter is, nobody really agrees on what a “complex character” is in the same way nobody knows what a “strong female character” is. It’s a bad and annoying descriptor that I hate. Generally, though, most lit people would agree that a complex character is one that doesn’t fit into any particular archetype due to conflicting motivations.  With this background, I can get more into why the “THEY ARE A COMPLEX CHARACTER” meta argument is an annoying and often reductive take that hurts literary analysis in fandom.  Archetypes exist for a reason. They are a storytelling tool - perfect for introducing motion into a plot or setting up something people will recognize. Complexity is only possible because archetypes exist. Breaking from an archetype is only interesting in that it is differing from a pre-established norm - there is nothing inherently better about characters that don’t fit archetypes, or characters that invert them, lampshade them, etc. There’s also nothing interesting about doing it in a story where every single character is doing the same thing, unless, of course, that is the point and is played on in a tongue-in-cheek kind of way (like Good Omens) or is played straight and used for broad thematic effect. There needs to be intent. Themes exist for a reason. Walking talking propaganda of certain themes and ideas GIVE A STORY A CLEAR ATMOSPHERE. You don’t need to be hackneyed about it and it certainly isn’t bad writing. Clarity is the single most underrated aspect of writing today, imo, and it’s really frustrating that people act like you need to only hint at themes that have a high chance of going over readers heads. There’s nothing particularly fun about inaccessibility or subtext so deep in the “sub” text that there isn’t any strong evidence of it at all, though it has its purposes and places (re: in narratives aimed at small groups of people who WILL understand what the author is hinting at, or in mysteries/horror/thrillers where some level of confusion is the goal, etc). Cartoons use very blatant tropes to make ideas BIG and LOUD and OBVIOUS in ways that are very good at creating humour and yielding reactions with relatively little screentime - it’s not bad writing, it’s knowing your audience.  A good example of walking talking propaganda characters is the cast of the Bioshock series. Down to their names, characters represented very clear ideas and were full of in-your-face religious imagery that was well-selected, well-executed, and consistent in a way that wasn’t up its own ass. There’s no doubt about anyone’s place in the story and guess what? It added to the richness of the world and the player’s experience of it in a way that overly detailed characters would not have. It also made the few outliers stand out even more as people for the audience to relate to.  Speaking of which... Complex characters are generally more interesting when supported by archetypal characters. It gives them the contrast they need to stand out and situates them as unique in the story’s overall atmosphere. It helps ID them as important to the plot and the ways in which they are. Also, archetypal characters can be rendered more interesting than complex ones by either having them be one of the few archetypal ones, by giving them more depth or making them relatable, or by simply having them embody an archetype people love (like the hero, for instance). And another thing; frankly, in a world where a LOT of fandoms and writers make a big deal of breaking cliches, cliches become interesting again. C’est la vie.  Stories aren’t just random and narratives aren’t often populated by real people. We LIKE narratives that we can understand that deliver messaging that can actually be parsed. Complex characters should never evade the messaging of a work entirely. They are meant to uphold it, to act as parallels and foils and in concert with dozens of other literary tools. Complexity doesn’t mean living outside of the atmosphere the work is trying to create. Complexity doesn’t mean intentionally running counter to the moral of the story for the sake of it. Writing has purpose. You are TELLING A STORY. It’s viewed through a lens - through perspective - that colours it AND every character within so they cannot respond like real people. It’s SO FRUSTRATING to see characters that damage the integrity of a story constantly described as “complex” just because they stick out like a sore thumb or as a way to excuse their poor placement. It’s even more annoying to have people constantly reach for ways to explain behaviour that IS NOT EXPLAINED IN TEXT / make it fit the narrative through “complexity” - AKA explanations of how a REAL PERSON could respond to some stimuli in a fictional story.  Complexity has to be supported in text to be a good argument (if you are fighting against people complaining a character is simple or that they have a singular motivation so their behaviour is inconsistent - it doesn’t excuse personal quibbles people have with a character being a dick and it’s super annoying to see it brought up in that context) or “good writing”. It can’t just be something you relate to or think could be possible. That’s not what it is. Characters are not real people who respond in completely random ways to input - characters are creations of a person within a story (unless the purpose of the story is to represent the real lives of people, in which case the moral framework is a whole other thing that I cannot get into because this is super long already).  All in all, I hate the whole “THEY ARE A COMPLEX CHARACTER” thing because I don’t think complexity is that deep bro, I think people use it to explain away their projection and shut down evidence/analysis based think pieces in an “it’s too deep for you bro” kind of way, it’s a symptom of people thinking that “smart” reading is conflicting and confusing bullshit and “stupid” reading is accessible clear-cut narratives, and I wish people would stop with the REAL PEOPLE DO X thing. Realism isn’t everything, and realism isn’t just you projecting onto a story and making pieces fit.

[robiness]

Qrow was meant to be a punching bag (theory, V7CH12 spoilers)

tw: depression, one brief mention of suicide at the very end

Many are upset about the literal and narrative butchering of two beloved characters in RWBY V7E12. The initial and probably most popular argument against what happened is that it doesn’t make sense, why would these characters do what they did. And honestly, that reasonable reaction to the injustice was mine, too.

But now that I’ve “calmed down”, meaning I’m finally not in a whirlwind of blind rage, indignation, and devastation, I started thinking about “Why did they do that?” with some level of depth. 

The answer I found is still unjust and disgusting, but at least it fell in line with something resembling logic.

Qrow enthusiasts have been complaining about his endless heartbreak. Why can’t be be happy for once? What’s the whole point in his recovery arc this volume if they’ll just scrap it? It’s like they put random tragedies on a dart board and the writers just started throwing.

Hear me out - they meant all of this. Every instance Qrow suffered is intended. They didn’t throw away his recovery arc because he was never meant to recover. 

I think that they’re going to make him an antagonist at worst, or a man driven to the ultimate tragedy at best. 

At this point, you’re probably like. What. Lol no. You’re as silly as the writers are.

But again, let me explain. I used to have that mindset of Qrow always being best but sad boy. A hero who just needs a chance. 

There was NO way this man will ever go dark:

he probably thinks he lost summer to salem

his nieces are actively hunted by salem and her forces, and RWBY for sure ain’t changing sides 

he’s always believed in the principles he has, and he’s always applied them. he’s a good Huntsman who cares, and knows his path 

he believes in ruby’s determination and ability to probs save the world

But that’s the thing.

He’s ALWAYS stuck by the principles he learned from Ozpin. Betrayal after betrayal, he was crushed but managed to somehow bounce back. 

This volume, he was on a good track. A good mind space. His kids are great, but then he met an equal - someone with literal plot armor against his Semblance. Misfortune is the reason why he stays away from the people he loves, why he blames himself for a lot of things, why he feels like baggage. 

A person his age who could be a friend, or more. Huntsman of equal ability and maturity.

Queerbaiting aside (I’m sorry I ever used that phrase, I hate them too), Clover was a possibility. Here was a potential team partner, friend, lover, whatever, but the point is he was finally free to explore what a developing relationship is like because here’s a guy who kinda got him, and probably won’t be harmed by staying close for an extended period of time. 

I think the chemistry in their fights solidified this too. Clover was someone who didn’t get in trouble by being at his side (except the first time in the mines, and Clover took it in stride and still succeeded).

Even better, Clover actually vocalizes that hey, it’s okay.

He doesn’t dismiss Qrow’s semblance, but he encourages Qrow to let go of the guilt a bit, that he’s worth more than his bad luck, and can continue to work around it. 

Qrow was nowhere near full recovery, but he was definitely on the way with a bit of Clover’s help. Later, my precious man finally smiles for real... not his smirk or sad smiles to Ruby. He’s smiling for the enjoyment of the moment and things are looking up!

(slightly sorry for the gif below)

(V7CH12 gifs would be appropriate from here on, but I am NOT doing that to myself)

So what’s the point, Robiness? We all know how THAT story goes. Qrow gets trauma because it’s shown to him, yet again, that his Semblance fucks up the good things, that even someone with the most potential to be safe ISN’T. Not around him. 

The whole crash was OOC, rushed and bad writing, whatever. But why did it happen? 

Qrow is basically the poster boy for mental health in this show. He’s depressed, and to him AND to the outside world, he’s right in thinking he’s only going to hurt people. He’s been proven right, many times, that he is bad luck.

What’s different this time?

He didn’t have hope, the other times he was let down. He had hope for humanity, yes, and that he can somehow contribute to saving it.

But he’s never had hope for himself, that he could be more than his Semblance. Clover’s character gave that to him. He was already trying to quit drinking, but that was for Ruby and the other kids, and by extension their mission, but not for himself.

When CRWBY killed that hope, it killed anything inside of Qrow that could’ve thought that he could be a hero. Or even simply better than he was before.

He’s crushed, his mind is clouded. As Clover died, he wanted to kill Tyrian, then he wanted James to fall. The legal type of justice wouldn’t be enough to assuage his need for vengeance. 

And he’s alone. Perhaps about to be arrested, I don’t know. But every other time he’s been crushed, he had the kids around to divert the attention even a little bit. But this time, there’s no one to help him process and move past this. No positivity from Ruby, no scolding from Yang to keep it together. No one.

If you’ve ever had mental illnesses, you could probably imagine being alone in that fragile state of mind. 

And you know who’s the most likely to know where the heck he is and that he’s going through something? His sister, Raven, because of her Semblance. 

Details have been important in how RWBY is told to the audience (though they retract when convenient lol). Sometimes, this includes release dates. February is the last month of winter, slowly turning into spring. Yes, I mean the Spring maiden. 

Let’s talk about Raven. 

She’s angry at her brother, also for feelings of betrayal. He betrayed their tribe, their values, everything they stood for. He left her, his sister. He chose Ozpin’s mission over her, even though their original plan was to just infiltrate Beacon to learn how to kill Huntsmen better. 

This means she remembers a boy that had the same ideas and supported her and their family. I don’t think she can accept that this Qrow, the one we know, is her actual brother, how he should be. When it comes to Qrow, I think what matters to her the most is proving that she was right all along, that they should’ve just stuck together and kept to their practices. 

And Qrow, regardless of the spring bit, if he encounters her as he is now... could easily believe that she was right. After all, the facts to him are:

He can’t escape his Semblance, ever.

He needs vengeance for Clover, because his death was his fucking fault. His attempt to deescalate the fight (leaving Harbinger in the snow) didn’t matter, because his bad luck won in the end. 

A plausible 3. Doing things “the good way” “the right way” is never going to cut it for him because he is walking misfortune. Something will always go wrong.

So why not drop all fucks and go ahead full-force?

His mind isn’t in its best state right now, and all his decisions will of course be emotional. 

We’ve known Qrow from point A depression to point B somewhat recovery to point C the last fucking straw. I think it’s something to consider that we’ve never heard anything about his youth, except that he used to believe in the brutality of their tribe. He never mentions it, and we don’t know anything about the circumstances that made him change, beyond “Ozpin gave him a place”. 

He gave up his heritage just to be proven that brutality would have protected his loved ones better. 

So yes, the punching bag theme, the endless misery, Clover’s death - all these are most likely building up to that shift in his character. We thought the eventual character shift would just be his recovery, but since that was scrapped, the only other way that makes sense is that he’s going to regress into someone that cannot be saved.

He’s not going to switch sides. He’s not going to stop loving his kids. He’s probably never going to join Salem. 

But his methods will be more ruthless now, driven by heartbreak and rage and self-hatred. God knows how he’ll deal with anyone in his way. He’s not going to fucking listen. He listened to Clover, and where did that get him? 

This way, the violent, straightforward way he used to know, this would protect his kids more efficiently, even if they don’t want him to go down that path. He’d probably leave them to protect them, and to be unhindered in his corner of the war.  

He’ll think that this - to be a rage-filled killing machine - would be the best case scenario for him and the rest of the world. Kind of like how he followed RNJR from a distance, killing all the Grimm that could get in their way.

We thought he was a broken man before, but this has been escalating. It’s been probably planned out since before.

If you’re not convinced yet, remember:

RWBY loves literature parallels. 

Leo Lionheart changed, and gave in to fear. The Cowardly Lion.

James Ironwood, the Tin Man, has proven that he’s thrown away his heart. 

Qrow Branwen, the Scarecrow, was always fucking destined to lose his mind.

I don’t know what will happen after, what kind of sick tragic death he’ll end up with. Since they’re romanticizing his suffering so much, he’ll probably end up killing himself after his work’s done. 

I have no idea how the details will go, but I’m pretty sure this is the path the writers will take. There is just no other reason I can fathom as to why they keep hurting my man. I want to be wrong, but I can’t think of anything else, unless some deus ex machina shit happens in the finale, but hell if I’m ever trusting CRWBY again. 

And yeah, as a depressed person who relates to and loves Qrow, the idea of the message of “it’s never going to get better” fucking sucks. 

[sage-nebula]

Back in SU, I remember everyone always celebrated what a caring and supportive dad Greg was, and how the Gems grew close family relationships with Steven. But with these latest episodes it seems like people are turning on them. Particularly that Greg is an incompetent and irresponsible father after Mr. Universe and the Gems handled the conversation really badly in Fragments, showing that they still don’t understand human emotions (also that it’s their fault Steven has PTSD). (1/2)

Personally it makes me sad. I still love all four of them and have faith in them as Steven’s support circle. I think everybody’s just looking for someone to blame (like it’s a game, like it’s a game...). What’s your take?

My take is that I take offense on a personal level whenever anyone (including Steven) acts like Greg was a bad or unfit parent.

My biological mother was terribly abusive to me. My father was emotionally neglectful, and while my stepmother was better than him, she still contributed to the emotional abuse that I’ve just now in my adult years begun accepting that he put me through. I’ve never had a parent that was emotionally available, supportive, and openly loving unconditionally. I’ve never had parents who encouraged whatever I wanted to do, who I could go to when I needed them without fear of punishment of some kind.

So put simply, I would have killed for a parent like Greg Universe. Hell, I still would now. Greg was always there for Steven, no matter what. Steven needed someone who would be open and honest with him with no reservations? That was Greg. Steven needed someone to just chill with, eat pizza and play music with? That was Greg. Steven needed someone to make him feel like he was good enough even when he made mistakes (“if every pork chop were perfect . . .”)? That was Greg. Steven needed someone to drop everything to take him halfway around the world to investigate the place in his dreams? That was Greg, and Greg didn’t even get upset with Steven for that resulting in his own abduction into a human fucking zoo.

For all sixteen years of his life, Greg gave Steven unconditional love and support. For all that Steven has a tendency to take blame upon himself, that tendency cannot be passed onto Greg, because Greg never berated Steven or went off on him for the things he did wrong. Hell, Greg went out of his way to try to make sure that Steven didn’t feel bad for the things that happened, most of the time; when Greg had a panic attack about the attack with the hand ship, and everything that followed, he drove away after reassuring Steven until he could calm himself down enough to talk about it! No matter what Steven did, no matter what went wrong, he had assurance that he could bring it to Greg because Greg wouldn’t grow angry with him. Because Greg loved him, unconditionally. Because Greg always wanted to spend time with him, always thought he was cool, always thought his ideas were interesting. Greg was emotionally available, openly loving and supportive, 100% of the time in Steven’s life.

Does this mean that Greg is perfect, and didn’t make mistakes? No! But here’s a news flash: There is NO SUCH THING as a perfect parent, because there is NO SUCH THING as a perfect person, and parents are people. People make mistakes. Period. There is not a single person on this Earth who has never made a mistake, particularly when it comes to interacting with other people. I know a lot of people on this website (and on Twitter) don’t like accepting that, but it’s true. And as it’s true, Greg did make mistakes. Play acting like his leg wasn’t really broken to try to spend more time with Steven was a mistake (and was the one time Greg made Steven feel as if his powers weren’t up to snuff / not good enough). Arguably not enrolling him in school was a mistake, although given how Steven behaved like he was eight when he was fourteen, I think he probably would have been bullied mercilessly by most peers his age and so that was probably a good call on Greg’s part. Not taking him to the doctor wasn’t a mistake, if only because Steven is half-gem and thus a.) probably didn’t get sick and/or need vaccinations the way a full human would, and b.) Greg had no idea how much of Steven’s biology was gem and how much was human, and probably didn’t want to run the risk of having him taken away by government officials to be experimented on given that he was half-alien. Even so, I understand why humans balk at that. They see Steven as a fully human child, even though he absolutely is not.

The point is: Yes, Greg made mistakes sometimes. But Greg was loving and supportive and always made sure Steven was provided for. Steven complains that he lived in a van, but we know for a fact that once he was old enough to form memories, he actually lived in a beautiful house on the beach. Greg lived in a van, but always nearby enough so that he could be there if Steven needed him (without stepping on the toes of Pearl, with whom he didn’t have a good relationship given the whole Rose debacle). Even though Greg wasn’t in the house, he knew the Gems would be able to look after Steven. He made sure that Steven was as safe as he could be, given that the threat of war with Steven at the center was always on the horizon, and provided for in every way (shelter, food, love, support). Setting aside Steven’s complex over his gem powers and his demands to be a Crystal Gem (which, let’s be honest, had Greg forced Steven to go to school, Steven would have been angry that it took away from his chances at gem missions, and you know he would, if you remember how bratty he was about it at the start of the series), Steven had pretty high self-esteem for a kid of fourteen, in that he never felt embarrassed or awkward about the things he liked or how he presented himself at all. And who do we have to thank for that, do you think?

I’ve had parents who were abusive or neglectful. I’ve been dragged by my hair and thrown into walls. I’ve been near hospitalized for being underweight because there was so little food. I’ve been told I was lazy and making up bullshit excuses when I tried to explain how depressed I was, and then put under lockdown an entire summer for it. I’ve had my interests criticized and mocked by my parents, I’ve been shooed away when I’ve tried to talk to them, I’ve been belittled and demoralized and I’ve put myself through stomach ulcers and breakdowns trying to find any solution to problems I have before I have to go to them, because I don’t want more lectures and have it brought up again and again years later. I know what it is to have abusive, neglectful, and all around bad parents---parents who will do all of the above, and then still find a way to say that it was either my fault, or good for me somehow. And Greg Universe? Is not that type of parent. At all. Not even close.

So basically, my take is that people who want to condemn Greg can shut the fuck up, at least when they’re around me. My take is that even though Steven has PTSD and is going through a lot, him screaming at Greg that it’s Greg’s fault that he’s like this for loving and supporting him all these years was him acting like a spoiled, ungrateful brat. Because I would have given anything to have a parent like Greg Universe. As someone with C-PTSD from childhood trauma and abuse, I’d trade spots with Steven any fucking day. And trust me, he wouldn’t like it.

[nobodies-png]

Sorry about that! Here's the letters I would like for Luxu/Xigbar: c d f j l x y z

gotcha ! 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Xigbar’s learnt to face everything head on and work around the problems, but he knows that kind of approach might not work for everyone - so if that doesn’t work for you, he’d try to figure out and see what does work. Maybe you need to wind down and go to a safe place without strong stimuli, just chill and stay grounded. Maybe you just need to scream and vent it out. Or maybe you just wanna curl up in a ball and cry for a while. That’s all valid. 

 The guy has pretty much a lot of free time, so if you can’t tell him specifically what he can do to help you in these situations, he doesn’t mind helping you find out. Needless to say, he doesn’t condone any type of habit or behaviour that can be harmful to you in any way. 

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

He doesn’t, easy. Boom. Can’t stress over what you so blatantly ignore and avoid to think about.

Also i’m answering these on reverse so i’mma go out and say that the last answer of this post can also apply to this question here.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Xigbar is rather lenient. The man knows how to play his cards to his favour and avoid the subjects that would genuinely get him mad. And the fact that time and death stopped having any sort of meaning to him also adds to this. What’s the point in staying MAD when everything is fleeting and bound to end ? Why not enjoy it to the fullest ? If you did anything to need to ask for his forgiveness, you can b e t Xigbar would just brush it off eventually - maybe joke and tease here and there about it. I think I even mentioned this before, it’s not necessarily a good quality as it can easily mean he doesn’t take things seriously.

So yeah, any argument with Xigbar is not a fight you can win. Even when it’s proven that you were in the right, you’ll always be left with a feeling of uncertainty, like you didn’t quite get your point across and you were simply told “yes, dear you were right” so you would simlpy avoid losing your temper. Again, very frustrating when you need to properly communicate with him. 

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

He acts jealous and spoiled, but only for fun. If you start befriending someone else or if you get along with someone new, Xigbar will butt in afterwards with silly jokes like “Oi, don’t forget about me” and such, keep you on your toes with his sudden appearances and public displays of affection. But all in all, he trusts you, so he has absolutely no reason to actually feel jealous. He also trusts that his reputation is infamous enough to let others know better than to try anything with you, whether it’s flirting or bringing you any harm.

But you know, the guy is still uh… human, I assume, so there are some things that bother him - Xigbar is known for switching bodies to continue his mission, but he kinda resents being so old ? So there are those rare moments when he sees you messing around with more active and young members like Demyx or Axel and he’ll just sulk in his own because this current vessel is getting old.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

It highly depends on how receptive you are, really.

If you acknowledge his advances and even flirt back, then he sees no point in stopping the fun to get all mushy and gushy and touchy feely. There is a clear mutual attraction, no need to confirm it oudloud with a love confession, right ? Unless you show him that’s EXACTLY the kind of romance you want, then he doesn’t mind pullling something outta his ass. 

If you’re the dense type, he’d take it as a personal challenge - how far does he have to go for you to realize that he’s into you ? If it backfires and you still have no clue, then Xigbar would just resort to letting you know directly. No blushing, no stuttering, no cute confession, just him and his straight forward nature. But I can also see him as giving a half-assed confession, kinda direct but also kinda confusing, a challenge for you this time, see if you can figure him out yourself.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Yes, yes and yes. The casual, light hearted and fun kind of affection is his favorite - like when he sweeps you off your feet out of nowhere just to see your reaction and then see how your first instinct is to hold on tight to him, only to get mad when you realize it’s one of his stupid ass pranks ? And then hearing you laugh when he starts blowing raspberries on your neck so you forgive him ? The best. 10/10, he’s gonna do that again. 

One of Xigbar’s favorite games is to see how many kisses he can steal from you on a daily basis without getting his ass beaten by you. And having the power of controlling s p a c e and portals really gives him a lot of advantage. But he loves it even more when you’re the one to take the initiative for these things, like smooching and cuddling. As much fun as he has when he’s messing with you, Xigbar also loves knowing that you like him just as much. 

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

This is the kind of guy that would sneak out of work just to bother you while you work, so take a wILD GUESS. But of course, Xigbar has plans to keep an eye on, make sure it goes according to plan so if he really really cannot afford to sneak away for a bit to see you, then he’s going to complain. Very loudly and very annoyingly, to whoever’s nearby to listen, probably turning it into a game to see how much whining they’re willing to withstand before their breaking point. It helps him forget that he misses you and keep his head in the game. 

And now that i’m thinking, it kinda sucks that bad guys don’t get phones cause otherwise, Xigbar would be blowing up your texts, spamming you at every given chance with cryptic shit, memes or stupid stuff.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

I -

I’m actually NOT sure :thonk:

Cause it’s obvious that he takes after the Master of Masters, in the way he jokes and even moves. Xigbar is loyal to him and his own mission, he’s changed wildly for the sake of completeing it. Both physically and emotionally, meaning that while he might be one cunning bastard, he might not be sensible or in tune with actual emotions. There is that small chance that everything he does unrelated to his mission is just idle entertainment, something to pass the time. 

Sure, he might love you. But he might’ve loved a dozen other people before this, all probably long gone. Sure, you might love him. But he’s had a dozen other identities. And while Xigbar values the present, it’s kinda hard to go to a great length for a relationship when in his eyes, it’s bound to end due to his responsibilities.It’s very bittersweet. But even so, we still know little about him - so this loyalty of his could easily extend to you, just like it applies to MoM and the other lost masters. 

So I dunno, gamers. I think that as long as Xigbar doesn’t have to directly choose between you or his mission, he’s ready to do pretty much anything, even if it’s just for the sake of seeing what happens. 

[sanguinarius-archive]

im not that familiar with treatsforbeats i watched like. a few videos but other than that i know nothing! but i would be glad to hear you info dump!

there is SO MUCH..... im gonna put a read more below because this turned out to be way longer than i expected. but you asked for me to infodump so here goes

okay so. treatsforbeasts, i dont know what the whole meaning behind the channel is. i cant specifically say what the goal of the channel’s content is because its all in my interpretation. but i do know that there are meanings behind each video as silly as it may seem and im just gonna list them off here (note that not all videos will be included since i may not be able to interpret every one, also this is going from earliest to most recent)

1. men with small hands carry very little treats to give to little girls with the sharpest little teethinterpretation of this video is csa/child sex trafficking. “little treats” refers to pills or some form of drug (small, makes u trip). however the “sharpest little teeth” could represent the little girl fighting back.

2. mom ordered ants for my birthdaychild abuse. mother forces son to watch and/or possibly engage in inappropriate activity with her husband.

3. i love jesusobviously a dark parody of christianity/catholicism. shows how blindly some fanatical christians/catholics will follow their beliefs, to the point where they no longer truly “follow” it as theyve warped the message to fit their own morbid desires (using christianity/the bible to excuse hatred and judgment upon others).

4. i me you love godanother dark parody of christianity/catholicism. i believe it mocks how fanatical christians/catholics focus only on the negative aspects of the bible instead of learning the true messages, as many of the words used are from the bible and are negative words.

5. behdsPROBABLY just a silly video but, i think it represents how people let negativity embed itself into their lives and complain about it even though it’s so easy to just let go of it.

6. jaffreymocking some sitcoms for how dumb and repetitive they can be.

7. kiss papa’s mustachepossibly child abuse, again.

8. storytimereferences/implies child abuse. storytime is also the name of one of treatsforbeasts’ songs on his Sanguinarius - Sin Nomine album.

9. hymns for him (1 + 2)just total parody albums of christian rock. vocals make you feel like youre dying but its actually kinda good to listen to in some parts

10. i screaming inside my headRoii (the character)’s first appearance. also probably symbolizes how depressing some kinds of music are

11. felines have nine livesnot sure but i feel like this is a warrior cats reference, in complete and total honesty (dont watch it if you dont like c/at d/eath though, its fictional but. yeah)

12. beastsreflection of society as a whole

then there’s. the two short films and sin nomine. so i’m gonna delve into that now and be warned, it’s fuckin long

treatsforbeasts is the self-titled short film and the first longest video on the treatsforbeasts channel. basically what i get from this is that treatsforbeasts, the channel itself, symbolizes an actual channel that chauncy (the child character in the short film, who is portrayed as a literal oral fleshlight with a body) watches. he consumes these concepts, such as internalizing misogyny (claw-paw skit), toxic masculinity (can i like balloons skit) and being exposed to a normalization of christianity (heaven and hell skit). there’s also a skit in which a spider binge eats and then proceeds to throw it up, which chauncy actually mimicks when his father brings him food.his father very much disapproves of these messages being shown on tv. he tells chauncy in regards to the claw-paw skit, when chauncy belittles the female character, “that’s not very nice, now is it”, and says “you can like ballons, you can love balloons if you want to”. his father goes on long tangents about how many institutions have normalized and inherited the concepts of christianity, and that it is one of the contributing factors of violence in the world. he references colonization, the holocaust, and in general mentions minorities.we learn that the father actually ended up being a father to chauncy in the first place due to (nsfw tw) masturbating in a sock to a picture of robert smith, and 9 months later chauncy was born. so technically there is no mother. the father talks about the meaning of life, and how everyone on the inside is a little bit of a freak, but there’s only two real ways you can accept that: 1) realize that your freakishness gives you a special lense through with you see the world and aid it in the ways the sane and happy ones probably cant, and 2) realize that real way number 1 is just lying to itself and that youre still a somewhat integral part of the lives of those you care for so deeply. he says that choosing which way to live really reverts back to the meaning of life, that you cannot live day by day believing there’s no reason to. “but whatever reason you give yourself to live, [...] you do it, because it is correct to live.”

sin nomine comes after the first short film, but i’ll delve into that after because really it touches on many many of the points and interpretations here.

the second short film, the beast is dead, was released just this year on valentines day! i think the main focus of the short film ranges from relationships to just once again a mockery of christianity/catholicism. once again it starts off with a father and his son. there is no mother figure present though she’s said to have left, due to the father watching too much “birdies”, a show, which i think is a metaphor for porn addiction. the father is implied to being prone to neglecting the son’s wants and not really caring for him, being disappointed in him, etc. etc..something important about the beast is dead is that it uses masks to portray those who are “followers” and those who are not. the father, interestingly enough, does not wear a mask. he seems to acknowledge what his son is saying when he goes on philosophical rants as well, but disregards them as nonsense and ends up leaving after bonking him with the stupid spike (metaphor for how parents will shut their children up by giving them a phone or toy to play with).the three other characters who don’t use masks in the beast is dead are Roii, Tom, and Doctor Zoughth (pronounced Zoth). Roii makes a comeback, finally! but this time he’s singing a song called “i love the sound of screaming babies”. it symbolizes how men will impregnate women and then run off, whether or not because they fantasize about pregnant women. it could also be a want of seeing a hurt child (hence the line “i know that all of you watching must think i’m insane, for loving when something so innocent is in so much pain”).however another interesting factor is that, the characters who don’t have masks, aside from Tom and the father, have red eyes at some point. this is a metaphor for how they’ve lost their humanity. Roii, at some point in the music video scene, only has one red eye whereas his other is normal. this hints at how part of him has lost his humanity while the other is still in tact.the other character that has red eyes is Dr Zoughth, but instead of him having only one red eye, both his eyes are red. this doesnt show until later though when he’s taken Tom away from the masked characters (followers). Dr Zoughth is very much self-aware. he is not blind, but simply has lost his humanity. Tom tries to reach out to him, to get him to think differently, that maybe resorting to coping with emotional struggles by worshipping something simple like flesh or something more higher than himself and forgetting his own mortality isn’t the healthiest way to live. but Dr Zoughth, having been long gone already, does not accept this and executes Tom.his own personal disciples grow tired of his tyranny and kill him and perform a ritual of some kind, disposing of his body (in the river i think, not sure). this entire ending of the film is basically the title, the beast is dead. but, i believe the beast is not dead, personally, because someone like Zoughth will always live on in other people, other beasts.there’s also a scene called grandma hespar and i think it implies how little people focus on sexual abuse towards men (when it’s from women).

anyways, with that being said, it’s time for sin nomine.

so now that i’ve explained pretty much all of treatsforbeasts to you, and whoever else is reading, it’s clear that the person behind this has issues with christianity (or catholicism), and child abuse. the person behind treatsforbeasts is Jordan Diniz, as he is also the person behind sanguinarius.

sin nomine is a very personal reflection of jordan’s life from what i gather. it depicts his struggles with how he views the world around him, whether that be due to personal experiences or not. at first i interpreted most of sin nomine to be the story of someone who is lgbt, but with jordan himself coming to me and telling me he is straight (POLITELY), it’s clear that is not the case.

so it most likely has to do with trauma. either religious or not, or both. it even says in the song storytime (remember i mentioned it earlier?), “fast hand, white hot trauma, reverberates inside the skull. innocence and intellect raped, reveals a view of a darker world. flesh on flesh, the bonds of affection - confused for the bonds of submission and fear. self-hatred and mistrust repel all beauty that comes near.” i don’t like to say that this solidifies a personal experience, but it’s highly possible.

a lot of sin nomine kind of goes over the same points in different ways, but it makes you think. i definitely feel like something happened to jordan at some point in his life but that is his story and it’s not my place to truly tell, since i don’t know him personally.

there’s also the other channel, adrianturcher. it has videos with seemingly no real purpose except for there being two videos with the same names of two songs on sin nomine, “nex memoria” and “a fetish for psychos”. nex memoria is just a compilation of clips that seem to symbolize the process of death (nex memoria is a latin phrase which very roughly translates to “memory’s death”). a fetish for psychos is a bunch of old clips from parties and shows that possibly jordan himself attended. they’re from 2002 judging by the date in the video. the lyrics in the song “a fetish for psychos” also seem to hint at these events, so it’s possibly that it’s like looking back on happy memories that make you feel sad instead or something. the song also might possibly reference a mother at the beginning.

sanguinarius also has its own channel simply called sanguinarius. there’s the music video for divine comedy (one of the songs on sin nomine) and a cover of because you’re young by david bowie, posted on his birthday a year after his death.

anyway, that’s. pretty much all i have to say. jordan diniz is a fuckin’ mastermind, he’s really good and cool and he’s very kind from my experience talking with him a couple times. he supports the gays as well!

sooooo, treatsforbeasts does have some very creepy/unsettling moments in its content but its EXTREMELY good and i recommend getting into it if you can. 100/10

[honestsycrets]

Ivar the Boneless || Love Alphabet

A = Affection (PDA, what sort of affection he gives)

“Kisses, my sweet.” He shifts. “Anywhere-- and everywhere.”  

Definitely someone who shows his affection day to day. He enjoys not only showing you that he loves you-- but making sure that everyone else knows that too. Both for your friends to know and any suitors that he might potentially have.

B = Babies

“Don’t play stupid.” He turns his head. “You know I want want to populate the earth.”

Ivar wants babies. After all, he was always someone that was told that he simply couldn’t have babies by all his brothers. Once he rids himself of stress-induced impotency, he’s just too excited to actually have one with you. Well, more than one. But one is a start!

C = Cuddles 

“In bed.”

Lazy in bed. He wants to spend his time completely and totally with you when he can. Ivar is a man that is constantly busy so his time is valuable. He best finds it in bed under warm furs, your legs in his under the warm crackle of the fire rather than going out.

D = Darling  (pet names)

“Are you complaining of them?” He twists his head to look over his shoulder. “I have others.”

My love, my sweet, my queen. He’s a little cheesy-- but after thinking that he would never have a love, he’s making up for it plus some.

E = Enamored (how hard do they fall when in love)

He looks down, a small embarrassed smile perking upon his lips. He has a hard time admitting it-- even to you.

Hardest of the hard. When Ivar is in love, its all or nothing. For Ivar there must be an instant connection. Once in love, he’s prone to listen to even things as silly as “get me the moon!” and he would consider it.

F = Firsts (a first on anything you pick)

He’s a ball of nerves. He won’t admit to anything, pouring you a glass of ale and motioning for you to sit down beside him, but you can tell in the way he moistens his lips so much.

Nervous. Nervous. Nervous. He’s a complete wreck trying to get everything together for his first date with you. He rather just spend time talking with you whether that is over the pier of Kattegat or taking a walk around his town with you.

G = Good Morning (how do they wake you)

“Wake up, sweet.” He rolls in the furs, laying the first of his kisses upon your neck that morning.

Wakes up cuddling close to you. He loves feeling your body in his bed after being so alone for so long. Tends to try to lay small peppering kisses along your neck, nibbles on your ears for softer wake ups. Though, sometimes waking you up isn’t always so innocent.

H = Hugs

“Hugs are for friends.” He grouches. “Do I look like a friend?”

He rather kiss your hand or lips rather then bother with hugs. He feels that hugs are intended for brothers-- not that he himself got many of those growing up. He’s a lazy hugger and gently runs his fingers down your spine when he is holding you tight.

I = In Labor

He stares from afar.

Ivar is anxious. No, anxious doesn’t even cover it! He’s a hot mess, drinking just to blur out your screams or cries. He’ll most definitely stay in the room while you’re in labor, smiling when you finally get a hold of his child.

J = Jealousy

“I hope you know how much I love you.” 

He’s a jealous creature. It doesn’t take much for Ivar to look over and consider who you are talking to. If they are a threat-- or if they aren’t. Axes will fly. But if you’re lucky, maybe he’ll just walk over to scare off the suitor himself.

K = Kisses

“I can give you more, if you like.”

Daily life with Ivar is filled with kisses. Some on your wrist, neck or lips. He expects that his day will be filled with them. If he doesn’t get enough, he’ll assume you don’t love him as much that day or that he did something wrong. 

L = Loyal 

“What use is there in having someone else?” He reasons. “I see none.”

As a hopeless romantic, he isn’t one to venture out of the marriage or relationship. He’s there until it ends-- one way or another. He always hopes that this one will last.

M = Memory

“On Freyja’s night-- in the spring.” He recounts with a little start and stop. The way he stops in between his words lets him know that he was reliving the moment.

Watching you dance in front of the flames of a crackling fire during Freyja’s festival. Keeping his eye and swirling about in tight little circles until you were in front of him-- the first night that he met you.  

N = Never!

Lies. Don’t lie to him or hide things from him. He doesn’t end up being quite forgiving in regards to it and will often remember it for quite a long time. He can forgive, in most cases, but he’ll definitely remember it.

O = On the Rocks

“I’m sorry.” You’re the only one he would apologize to like this, reaching out to set his hand upon your feet.

Ivar doesn’t apologize often. But if he were to, it would be to you. He knows that he’s a lot to handle... and so he’ll often appear at the front of your bed, rubbing your feet to see if he can slowly ease his way closer and closer to you. If you’re in the ‘dog house’ he’ll often ignore you until you do the same.

P = Playtime

Ivar is an eager lover. Out on raid or back at home, he knows just how he wants you. Ivar loves to be spoiled by you, sure, but his favourite is spoiling you the way he likes it. If he’s been away long, it will be hard and fast. But most of all, he likes taking his time with you.

Q = Quiet Time

“What quiet time?” He sighs. 

He doesn’t get that much quiet time anymore-- mostly because of all the children he’s asked you for. More often he spends his time drunk with a child crawling over his lap, teaching his sons and daughters how to shoot properly and making a mess of the Great Hall.

R = Rapture

“Tell me about our child.” He’ll ask, rubbing his hand over your round stomach. “How is he today?”

He is most filled with infectious smiles and laughs when he hears you tell him something about your future with him. Accepting a date, accepting his offer for marriage-- those are all things that make him intensely happy.

S = Soulmate

“There are such things?” He asks. “I did not even know what a soul was.”

Ivar doesn’t believe that he has a soulmate until you tell him. Even still he is skeptical... but if anything, the dreams he has fortifies his belief in actually having a soulmate. 

T = Together

“Come sit with me!”

Ivar tends to keep to you more than others. He’ll interact and tolerate his brothers, enjoy Whitehair’s company, but most of all-- he likes to be together with you in his free time. 

U = Unyielding

“Whatever needs be done, I’ll do. You only need ask.”

Of all the brothers, Ivar is the least likely to give up on you. He’s not the type to let anyone get in the way of what he wants and if it has to be done with interlopers, he’ll be sure to get rid of the interlopers too.

V = Vulnerable

“I’m alone.” He says. “In everything but you.”

In all things war, no one can tell him anything. However... when it comes to you, kissing down his neck or asking him the most intimate of questions, he might fall silent. In the beginning of the relationship, you might need to take the lead.

W = Wedding 

In his opinion, “The best of weddings is showing off your bride.” 

Everything Ivar does is a little extra. So this is nothing new. He wants all of Kattegat to see his new bride-- and so you’re probably going to feel the pressure to be his perfect bride. In the end, Ivar comes to console you about the whole thing.

X = (E)x

“I don’t do exes very well.” By that he means, they don’t usually live.

In the case of his ex not being killed... he would be very much a balance of hateful and curious. Ignoring and showing off his new woman is of course something he would do, but when you don’t look, he might just be watching...

Y = Yearning

“I’m eager to get home to my wife.” He would tell his brothers, lost in frivolous moments with whatever thrall they chose overseas.

Ivar is good at separating raiding from loving. But as the war dies down and it’s time to go home, missing you gets too much to handle. Unlike his brothers, he’s not a rapist. He simply enjoys the time to himself with his hand and visions of home.

Z = Zzz...

“You’re precious to me.”

Ivar is a light sleeper. His mind is going-- constantly fretting over things that he cannot control. When he cannot sleep, he’ll spend his time watching you against the sheets. 

[sometimesrosy]

honestly i admire your metas and positivity but for me this show ended,i know you think JR is different but the100 is gonna be another dissapointment like all the shows right now, b/c it won't happen not ambigous just not happening but clx or b/e either, because JR change the story after clx blackash he changed the story, course is b/c story and they WERE endgame since the begining,now to make all sides happy they won't be endgame and it's unfair for the story. i hate the100 fans so much.

thank you for your admiration, but your theory here doesn’t make sense with the canon we have already gotten.

and it is JUST a theory, one that derives from feelings of anger, upset, bitterness, mistrust, persecution and self centeredness. 

Let me explain. You are hurt that the show did not go in the direction you wanted it and thought it would go. You have focused on the backlash of CL as some sort of key to you getting or not getting what you want. You think that JR is trying to placate fans who are angry (and all of them are angry) and in so doing, will create a story where NO ONE is happy. Not CLs not B/Es not BCs and not the creators... because it’s not the story they wanted to tell. 

First of all, that means that you think this story is being written around the fans and their desires, whether FOR their desires or against them, it puts the fans desires at the center of the story. THAT is what I mean by your theory being self centered. You literally think the story of The 100 is about you and other fans. 

That’s not what is happening.

You say of course the story is about B/C and this has been from the beginning and this was the plan in the beginning and I can’t fault you for that interpretation because I share it and there’s lots of evidence for it. 

But your NEW interpretation is that they are no longer DOING that endgame Bellarke, and you simply have no evidence for that. Because the story has CONTINUED to focus on Bellarke. 

If you’re saying that they’re going to keep the story platonic, I’d have to argue that it is too late for that interpretation, because Bellarke has gone explicitly romantic with multiple conversations of how much Bellamy loves (AND THAT WORD HAS BEEN USED) Clakre, and comparisons to both B/E, comparing his romantic love for Echo with how he feels about Clarke, AND another epic love story, this one tragic, with Josephine and Gabriel. The relationship between Clarke and Bellamy has not STOPPED being the center of the story, it has become, on the contrary, THE ACTUAL MAIN PLOT, AND it is being framed as romantic.

So, while we have not gotten consummation of Bellarke with our beloved kiss/confess/sex, and we have not gotten Bellarke to REACH the goal of a romantic union, the story that takes us closer to that romantic union has been set up, moved forward, and held back.... not because it’s going to remain ambiguous but because THEY ARE ABOUT TO TAKE US TO ROMANTIC ENDGAME in season 7.

They have been saving the romantic endgame for the end of the story, because THAT is how important it is to the story.

Having it not be reached yet is not a sign that it is ambiguous, that they have given up on it or that it’s not happening. 

It just hasn’t gotten to the end of the story. It is a slow burn. That’s just what it is, no matter how we don’t want it to be. You have to deal with that and with what it means to WRITE an epic slowburn.

The consummation takes longer to get to, but it is deeper and more meaningful and more organic. 

And don’t you dare come into my inbox with your anti opinion.

You are part of the 100 fandom, my dear. The same 100 fandom that you hate. You’re doing the same thing. Erasing canon content to feed your woe-is-me bitterness because you didn’t get the story you want. And you are sending your negativity to someone who doesn’t share it and in fact loves The 100, loves the canon story of Bellarke, and really enjoys the writing.

I don’t think JR is “different” I am fully aware he is hollywood too. But I’m watching his actions to SEE what he’s doing. And he’s wrapping up the story he’s been writing since the beginning. And he’s developing that endgame that you think he tossed. He is putting the seeds and development INTO the plot so that when it falls together, it’s all going to feel natural and real, not forced. He’s doing a love triangle but he doesn’t want it to end in the stereotypical melodrama, but rather a satisfying conclusion. That’s why he’s building Echo UP to have her own needs separate from B/E, so when B/E ends, because they cannot give each other what they each need, it will be positive for Echo and she won’t simply be the one who loses to Clarke. 

I don’t think you have been following the narrative arcs. You’re missing the development as it’s happening and will only be able to understand after it happens and you can go back and put the pieces together that I’ve been putting together all along. And also, that is fine. I recognize that I am not the general audience and am familiar with how the magic tricks work, while most of the audience is just watching the show and flash and dazzle, as they are supposed to.  But you’ve let the fandom negativity into your head, so now all you have is a belief that it’s all fake and none of it is happening, and you’re making yourself miserable over it. 

And in so doing, you are blaming the show, the writer, the industry, the fandom, and not just having enough patience to wait until the end of the show and find out what happens. You’re prejudiced and acting as if your prejudgment is canon and truth. And it’s just not. It’s a feeling you have, one not based in canon. 

But you’re sending it to me to... I don’t know why. To make sure I understand the truth that it’s all shit? (it isn’t.) To convince me that bellarke is dead? (just STOP FUCKING DOING THAT. ship and let ship.) To complain? (I don’t want to hear it.) To beg me for a more hopeful theory? (but you’re reading my meta and you dont’ believe me so why are you asking for more?) To make me feel bad and hopeless like you do? (how dare you. that is toxic and aggressive and mean.)

STOP.

If you dont’ like the show, then stop watching. Or if you can’t bear to give it up, fine keep watching. But you don’t need to exacerbate your upset feelings by engaging with fandom. If you think I’m writing neat meta but am delusional, please do me the favor of unfollowing me. I don’t need that kind of toxicity in my life. If you like the hope my metas give you but still dont’ believe, that’s your choice, and I DO NOT NEED TO HEAR how my canon evidence is less important than your feelings. And my feelings are less important than your feelings. 

Don’t send me any more asks like this or you will be blocked. 

This is a bellarke positive blog, and you don’t have to believe in bellarke or even love bellarke to read or to send me asks, but you have to NOT SEND ME ANTI BELLARKE STUFF. And heartbroken bellarkes who think bellarke is dead count as antis. YOu dont’ believe. Keep it to yourself. Write it on YOUR blog. Not mine. If the show ended for you then go away. I’m watching the show. And I like it. You and I aren’t fans of the same thing anymore. 

[mojoflower]

My child with CIDP (a chronic neurologic illness)

Thank you for asking, @sunshinemeansmylove.  I’m always happy to share our story -- it’s cathartic.  And also, *I find it interesting, so I assume others do, too ;)

Almost ten years ago, when Phoenix had just turned 5, he started walking oddly.  We didn’t think much of it for a day or two, because he didn’t complain of anything hurting.  It got bad enough that one of his preschool teachers asked about it, so we took him in for x-rays and whatnot.  But they found nothing.  They put him in a boot for possible Kholer Disease, just in case (I don’t even know what that doctor was thinking), and with the boot, he essentially stopped walking altogether, and kept saying he didn’t want to go to preschool anymore:  so I took him out.

Within a week he’d stopped playing as much.  He appeared quite content just watching everyone else play.  He’d only stand on sidewalks instead of going on the grass.  (You need to know that he already had a long history of medical shit, because he didn’t walk until after 2, and didn’t talk until late, and was diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Delay and “symptoms relating to autism” and had had 3 years of intensive therapies and Early Intervention by this point.  So I figured the grass thing was sensory, instead of balance.)

He started doing stairs on his bottom, instead of walking, and one day he fell down them.  (We’d moved into a new house... with stairs... only 4 months earlier.  Of course.)  The next day, he was on the living room floor, playing with his matchbox cars, and couldn’t get up.  That was the last time he stood for weeks.

All this time, he remained sweet-natured and amenable and never said that anything hurt.  But now he couldn’t walk and couldn’t stand.  We rushed him to the Children’s Hospital (which in Atlanta is very reputable, thankfuckinggod).  They ran tests.  Oh, god, they ran tests.  He didn’t have reflexes at all, and couldn’t feel his hands and feet.  This is hands-down the most terrifying period of my life, ever.

Finally, with a spinal tap and a horrifically invasive and ghastly and painful EMG test (wherein they jab a pin into your thigh muscle, poke another further down the leg and run an electrical current between the two to measure degree of  blockage in the transmission).  Phoenix had complete nerve conduction blockage (100% paralysis of his legs... it was moderately better in his arms and hands).

He cried and screamed and begged me and Daddy to help him while the doctor was doing this (it took something like half an hour).  But they couldn’t give him pain killers or tranquilizers of just knock him out, b/c that would have messed with their results, so we had to hold him down.  It’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to me, and to this day I won’t go to the hospital without a bottle of xanax in my purse, because the doctors can’t prescribe it for the parents, even though EVERYONE NEEDS IT, because you have to be calm for your kid.  Fuck, I’m crying just thinking about it.

We brought him everywhere in a little red wagon, which CHOA uses instead of wheelchairs, all nestled up with blankets and his lambie.

(One utterly thoughtless fucker -- not his neurologist -- said if his nerves didn’t work and it was progressive, it’d eventually move up his arms and legs until it reached his heart and lungs and suppressed breathing and then he’d die.  Which is factually true, but jesus christ.)

We thought he was going to die.  Over less than 20 days he’d gone from normal(-ish) healthy kid to a lump in a hospital bed who couldn’t move his legs at all and couldn’t wrap his hands around anything, couldn’t hold you back when you held him.

CIDP in children is incredibly rare.  It’s a super-rare condition regardless, but usually people get it as adults (average age 50).  It’s something like .000005% of the population.  Like, maybe there are 20 kids in the entirety of metro Atlanta who have it.  CIDP is a neuropathy in which the person’s immune system begins attacking the insulating sheath (myelin) around nerve cells, starting at the peripheral nervous system (hands/feet, legs/arms).  Without this fatty sheath, electrical signals from the brain simply don’t transmit to the muscles.  In many cases, there’s intense, phantom pain associated with it, but thankfully, Phoenix has only ever been numb, and I pray with my whole atheist heart and soul that it never changes.

But we lucked out, and the neurologist we got at CHOA identified CIDP fairly quickly (within a week, during which we never left the hospital, of course) and started him on IVIg.  IVIg is intravenous immunoglobulin -- essentially strained human plasma -- to remove all but the specific antibody Ig.

(SO PLEASE:  GO DONATE OR SELL YOUR PLASMA, it’s keeping kids like mine out of wheelchairs.  It costs more than gold, it cannot be synthesized or taken from animals.  They don’t know the exact mechanism by which it works (they call it a “black box”) but it does, and it’s fucking miraculous.)

With sufficient IVIg, the myelin sheath is repaired fairly rapidly.  At first, he needed infusions every three days.  (Generally, specialists told me, kids his age will go into remission after a year or two.  Phoenix, bless, is special and never has, even though I kept waiting and waiting.  Almost ten years later, and he’s steady like clockwork, remission never on the horizon.)  Over the years, we’ve managed to stretch the intervals to 15 weeks.  Which is great, because insurance HATES US:  the pharmacy cost alone is easily $100k+ a year, not to mention hospital stays and clinics.  Annually, we have to defend his need to go at whatever interval it is at the time, they’re always pushing us to stretch it further.

So he’s been on maintenance for many years.  There are some visual cues if he begins to decline, like his feet slapping when he walks, or using the bannister with two hands when he goes upstairs, but it’s not always that obvious.  This week, I asked him if it was the CIDP when he tried to get out of band practice for the third time, and he said yes, but I don’t see those other cues (although he’s been laying on the sofa for a few weeks and has stopped hanging out with his friends and is sleeping longer) so I don’t know if I just handed him a really good excuse to stay home and play computer games.

He’s been low-key complaining for about a week, and our next IVIg appointment isn’t until Oct. 1st.  You have to schedule months in advance so rescheduling for earlier isn’t possible, not to mention insurance will gleefully not pay if it’s earlier than 15 weeks (which means $9-$17k out of pocket, depending on the whimsy/voodoo of the hospital billing department).

So.  Yeah.  This is what it’s like to have a child with a chronic illness.  (CIDP is Chronic Inflammatory Demyelinating Polyneuropathy, btw.  It’s essentially the lifelong version of Guillain-Barré, that thing you see warning signs about when you go get your flu shot.  It can only be maintained, not cured.)  This is a good example of why it’s so vital for laws to prevent insurance companies from turning people down due to preexisting conditions.

It’s hard, as a parent.  He could be a typical teen who’d rather not spend all day in school... or his nervous system could very literally be slowly deteriorating.  I have to make judgement calls all the time, and sometimes I’m wrong.  It’s kind of terrifying.