#your asses forever i love you guys but im out of here’. and god i .. as much as i loved y0 makoto should have left her shitassed husband

[courfeyracs-swordcane]

I got tagged by @tesho-travels to do ten songs I have on loop lately!

1. Danny by Grover Anderson and Jimbo Scott

2. My Body’s Made of Crushed Little Stars by Mitski

3. The entire Equalizer Robobs playlist

4. Goodbye Yellowbrick Road by Elton John

5. Funeral Pyres from ARISTOS: the Musical

6. Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown on a Bad Bet by Fall Out Boy

7. Hallelujah

8. This Is Love by Air Traffic Controller

9. Telephone Wire from Fun Home

10. Draft Dodger Rag by Pete Seeger

Tagging @nosongunsung11 @wildfandom @coyotefang1987 @lemonade-comet @nplutonian @theparallaxview @dogliker73 !!! And anyone else who wants to do it just say I tagged you I like seeing people’s music

[rissouu]

could you do a plug! eren x reader where eren gets super overprotective 🩷

yesss ofc! im sorry this took a while i just had to get some damn motivation 😭 i been slacking.. my bad pookies!

his hands stayed wrapped around your waist as you walked through the mall, he promised to take you on a shopping spree. and right now the only thing you really needed were shoes— so foot locker it was.

it was like eren could sense all the stares you were getting, in his eyes those tiny ass the shorts you wore barely covered up anything.. (he was just being dramatic, the shorts weren’t that tiny but he still hated them.) he made a mental note to toss the shorts out as soon as you two made it home.

he tried getting you to change before you guys even arrived at the mall, but of course you weren’t going to listen to him— you never did. that’s one of the characteristics he loved about you but that didn’t make it any less annoying.

when you finally reached the famous shoe store, you couldn’t hide your excitement. you’d always been a sneaker head after all, always having the newest pair of dunks or jordan’s, a lot of people envied you because of it honestly, but oh well.

you couldn’t resist snatching out of eren’s hold and practically running towards the shoes on display. the dunks that you’d been wanting for months finally dropped, and you just had to get them before they sold out.

“ma you know how i feel ‘bout you walkin’ off on your own,” he made his way back over to you, annoyance evident on his face. eren hated when you did this, he wanted(needed) to be by your side at all times. why couldn’t you understand that?

“im sorry babyyy, i just really need to check if they have my size!” you bent over to take the shoe off the rack— completely forgetting that your shorts were the type to rise up when you did so.

you didn’t think too much about it and stayed in your current position— throughly inspecting the shoe. the color looked better online but shit, it was still cute.

eren eventually got tired of standing, he knew how you got when it came to shoes. he’d be standing there for a whole damn hour fucking with you, so he just sat down on one of the benches used to try on shoes.

he always got so bored coming to stores with you because you always tuned him out and wandered off on your own. you were addicting to shopping and even more addicted to shoes.. the only thing he could do was sit down and go on his phone, since you’d clearly be taking forever.

you were so focused on the baby blue shoes that you hardly even noticed anyone’s presence behind you, turns out one of the workers had been eyeing you for quite a while now.. waiting for his chance to make a move. your beauty caught him off guard and he knew he couldn’t let a fine thing like you just walk away.

“hello welcome, did you need help with- oh god damn..”

that was enough to finally get eren’s attention off his phone as his eyes snapped towards the scrawny dude licking his lips— enjoying the sight of your shorts working against you.

with a low chuckle your man stood from his seat, slowly inching towards you to make his presence known. he snatched you by your waist— easily causing your form to straighten out. he took his eyes off you for one second and you’re bent over with them little ass shorts on?

he had half a mind to just fuck you right here and now to let all these muh’ fucka’s know who you belong to, but luckily he had enough self restraint.

“i’ll kill you right now man, ion even play like that. better walk yo’ ass on somewhere,” eren slightly lifted his black tee— flashing his gun that was strapped on his waist. he roughly yanked you behind him so the fucker wouldn’t dare to look at you again, and the only thing you could do was let him.

not that you would’ve resited anyway, you loved when eren got aggressive like this (not that you’d ever admit it).

“o-oh that’s you? i apologize i didn’t-“

“’fuck up talkin’ to me yo, you got five seconds to walk away before i put a bullet in you.” one death glare from eren was enough to send the worker running off in fear.

you stayed silent because you knew better than to say anything when he got like this, you were in for it once you got back home.. that’s for sure.

“fuck those shoes, we’re leaving. and as soon as we get in the car i want them shorts off,”

[csainzoperator]

smooth operator ☆

summary: y/n leclerc spending her summer in spain, with a special someone. but everyone is going crazy! who is this special someone???

(carlos sainz x celebrity!reader)

read more under the cut!

y/nusername has posted!

summer break has been enchanting 🐚🌊 liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 92,928 others

landonorris without me??? 😞😞

- y/nusername next time, bestie 🤞🏼

- cqrlando NAH BYE NOT LANDO BEING A GREEDY BSF 🖐🏼

f1wags WHO IS THAT MAN

charles_leclerc first summer without your annoying ass 🙄

- charlesf1goat UM IF THAT'S NOT CHARLES?? QUEEN ARE YOU SOFT LAUNCHING RN??

- y/nusername you can just tell me that you missed me, lechair ‼️

carlossainz55 🌟

y/nusername has liked this comment

- f1islife UM GUYS ARE YOU SEEING THIS

- chillisainz what. does. that. mean.

- lechair16 GUYS NEW COUPLE??

pierregasly nice cap, hermano

- f1gossip HERMANO???

-y/nusername ikr, i got him that 😋

- carlosssred HOLY MOTHER. IS THAT SAINZ?

lilymhe so pretty, my love 😫

- alex_albon say what now

- y/nusername besos, lily 💋

- carlossainz55 🤨

- f1girly RAH STOP YALL SEEING THIS??

new gossip in the paddock. it is said that carlos sainz has been seen spending his summer break with y/n leclerc. is it true or are the fans going crazy?

y/nusername has posted!

don't wanna leave, ever. :/ liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton, carlossainz55 and 1, 27, 928 others

lilymhe MOTHER IS MOTHERING OH MY GOD

- y/nusername STOP I LOVE YOU

carlossainz55 mamma mia

- y/nusername oh please 🖐🏼

- carlandooo UM???? THIS JUST CONFIRMS IT.

lewishamilton bro never misses back day

y/nusername has liked this comment

- ln4team LEWIS WHAT DO YOU KNOW. PLS SPILL

- y/nislove OH MY GOD???

no1ynlover wow. guys. she's so pretty i cannot

carlossainz55 has posted!

home :) liked by y/nusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 108,89,829 others

landonorris wow i hate you guys for leaving me all alone

-carlossainz55 love you too, mate

- carlosxlando guys??? didn't he tell y/n something similar?

- landonorizz LANDO OUT HERE EXPOSING RN

carlandohoes GUYS THAT'S Y/N 100%

- f1wags what if they are on a friendly trip?

- smoooooth GIRL WHO ARE YOU GASLIGHTING RN 💀🖐🏼

y/nusername ORAAAANGES ‼️

- carlossainz55 no shit sherlock

- f1gossip HELP. i feel like my girl y/n gets bullied in this relationship 😭

- carlosschili ITS SO CUTE THO

fresh news. carlos sainz's latest post includes a woman, who most likely is y/n leclerc. the new couple are keeping it private but are surely not hesitating to show each other off as sainz has also made special appearances on y/n's latest posts.

y/nusername has posted!

my smooth operator <3 liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 99,828 others

charles_leclerc *pretends to be shocked* omg congrats guys!

landonorris THERE ARE KIDS ON THIS APP

- maxverstappen1 i told you to delete instagram 🙄

carlossainz55 te quiero, amor 🧸

- y/nusername BESOS 💋

f1wags IM GOING INSANE OMG

carlandooo CRYING THEY'RE SO CUTE AND PERFECT TOGETHER

lilymhe carlossainz55 YOU STOLE MY GIRL

- carlossainz55 she has literally been my girl since forever wym.

- f1fansss I CAN'T. "my girl" SQUEALING

the end ♡

[pinkrecs]

pinkrecs’s bts yandere fic recs

[POSTED ON JULY 12th 2022]

note: this is most (honestly just checkout all of these authors’ masterlists--there’s more great gems) of my favorite yandere bts recs! please show much love to our wonderful authors. the yandere genre does contain triggering themes (ex: representation of toxic relationships, possessive/obsessive behavior, non-con/dub-con, violent behavior, etc). read at your own risk + check out the author’s notes. ENJOYYY ^^

i would love to give each fic a detailed comment on how i love it but i lack the words and writing capabilities to do that. so hope a short spoiler-free comment will do (sorry). GO GIVE THESE FICS A LIKE, REBLOG, OR COMMENT!!!!

POLY/MULTI:

- death valley by @bangtangalicious 

↳ gang + rocker + fightclub au + ot7 x reader. my brain is dizzy & fucked (in a good way) after reading this. each member gets their own time to shine and the characterizations of each member are crazy. this fic is a messy ass rollercoaster and the smut is scrumptious too!!

- gumiho cisswap bangtan x reader by @bloodsweattearscatharsis

↳ gumiho + cisswap au + poly ot7 x reader. its obvious from the title since the author mentioned that they haven’t made a title for the fic lol. honestly, go give this a read because the dynamic of ot7 is quite fun and i LOOVEE the suspense that from each chapter. all of them could run me over anytime and also HOT WOMEENNNNN ayyyyyyyyy go read bc it needs more luv

- house of serpents by @smasmashie

↳ mafia au + ot7 x reader. every character in here needs to go therapy but also not because i need to see more drama unfold. ot7 seems to care for the mc but their actions shown are... uhmm... questionable. but that makes this fic good though! reading each chapter like it’s the morning newspaper 

- in your dreams by @voidswan

↳ idolverse au + vmin x reader. GOD THIS WAS INTENSE, i was shaking, gasping, and throwing uppp!! vmins are menaces in this one but god you can’t help but want more D: i’m like the mc--who’s a moth attracted to the flame.

- lilies of the valley by @girlmeetsliv3

↳ a/b/o au + poly ot7 x reader. each relationships between the members and towards reader is mysterious and there was underlying tension of meeting the pack’s expectation. in some way, it gets uncomfy at some parts yet that is what keeps each chapter an enjoyable read.

- lovesick by @angelicyoongie

↳ soulmate au + ot7 x reader. mc is very unlucky gal... not only having one BUT SEVEN yandere as soulmates lmaoo.. and the soulmark inflicts on both people if one of them gets hurt. that’s rough damn! i’m still unsure if all of them know that all of them are sending her letters. keep notifications ON for this fic 

- nephilim by @royallyjoon 

↳ cult + supernatural au + poly ot7 x reader. it was defintlely chilling while i read this. while there’s some sense of normalcy, the larger control of the cult makes keeps us feeling uneasy. 

- on the first day of christmas, my true love gave to me by @forever-once-gone 

↳ ceo + christmas au + poly namkook x reader. namkook is crazy and unhinged when they show their true colors. jungkook is very VERY sweet tho i cant hate him rip

- strangers by @bestaez

↳ strangers from hell au + ot7 x reader. i haven’t read watched the kdrama so i can’t compare between the two. this is definitely interesting as we can see SOME insight to how ot7 plans it and covers up their tracks to avoid getting caught. i hope the mc can get the tf out that apartment and we can see the reasoning for these actions of ot7 in future chapters

- school f*cking sucks! series by @sluttyandere

↳ high school au + maknae line x reader. all characters are of legal age btw! sucks to be mc because she just getting snatched from each guy like that. and she’s the class president but kinda powerless since two of them control her status at the school. all three of them are massively wicked and im kinda digging it LMAO

- thou shall not steal by @xherxx

↳ mafia + spy + enemies to lovers au + poly ot7 x reader. as the author mentioned, this fic is on the lighter side of the yandere spectrum. i love the mc in this fic. a girlboss icon actually. adored every interactions between the mc and each member. it’s a VERY pleasant read lol

- where three stars meet by @girlmeetsliv3

↳ poly sope x reader. this felt like a movie to this. i could picture everything in my head and sope was quite mysterious in this. and the little details placed throughout the story makes it enticing to continue reading. 

- “why you look so pretty when you cry?” by @minniepetals 

↳ mafia au + poly ot7 x reader. the way ot7 brings hopes up for the mc before crushing them down so she breaks and realizes that her only option is them is tragic for the mc... yet it’s a whole serve!

MISC (aka idk where to categorize these lol):

- never ever after by killingpeach (AO3)

↳ fairy tale au + ot7 x oc. each member is based on a character of well known fairy tales. for the mc to leave the story, she must make the member of that fairy to fall in love with her for “the end” to happen. i love the author’s versions of these fairy tales. each time the fairy tale ends, ik the oc is like: “i won... but at what cost??”

- seven princes of campus series by @bibbykins 

↳ college au + ot7 x reader. this series includes various fics with each member and their s/o and is more on the softer side of yandere! each couple is cute and the build up of how each became to be to great!

- tatemae; 建前 series by @99liners

↳ trophy wife au + ot7 x reader. this series includes various fics with each member and their s/o. the gaslighting and manipulation is wild in these fics y’all. and each time, the ending of the fic makes think like: damn... these men not seeing the pearly white gates of heaven

- the tarot series by @flowesona​ 

↳ ot7 x reader. this series includes various fics with each member and their s/o and “each inspired by one of the major arcana tarot cards.” i love this concept and each plot is easily able to get into. 

MEMBER X MEMBER:

- desire by kyoigi (AO3)

↳ demon au + jikook. demon jimin is hot yet creepy at the same time. and the way jimin goes through his inner turmoil before realizing his feelings for jk + jk starting to piece everything together?! just scrumptious 

- mused obsession series by @sombreboy + @chimoona

↳ photography + model au + jikook. the way jimin falls into jk manipulative and obsessive nature is crazy yall... and how they show their devotion towards each other? fucked up yet i can’t keep my eyes away from it!

- photos of you (and where I should be) by korknight (AO3)

↳ photography + rapper au + yoonkook. jungkook is risking it ALL for yoongi! down MASSIVELY bad yet jk gaslights himself into his actions are good for yoongi. 

- watching you, watching me by mellifluous_kim (AO3)

↳ idolverse au + yoonkook. THE TWIST? you knew my jaw FELL to the FLOOR?!? it’s a must-read because everything is not what it seems D:

KIM SEOKJIN:

- carnal by @kosmosguk

↳  vampire au. mc folded that quick... honestly same here too! just immaculate *chefs kiss*

- contact by @gorehsk

↳ alien au. pure filth and i love it.  

- rose gold by @sweetwolfcupcake 

↳ idolverse au. jin is quite eerie in this fic. he’s subtle with his yandereness and  calculated with his actions.

- the baron by @therealmintedmango​ (AO3)

↳ historical au. jin is charming and no one can suspect a damn thing. a fun read!! 

- the lost, the found, and the treasured by @forever-once-gone

↳  reincarnation + royalty au. so well-written!! there’s small details in the story and by the end... you see piece together. seokjin waited for a long time and i could see why (even though it’s quite haunting). 

MIN YOONGI:

- ash and cinder by @chimchimsauce 

↳ cinderella au. a cinderella retelling with yoongi as our prince. great fic with the yandere twist!

- beloved by @bang-tan-bitches

↳ historical + empire au. this fic was a RIDE. mc is a supportive sister yet she unknowingly attraction of yoongi. his desire is eerie and attractive at the same time. 

- beneath the world by @nomnomsik

↳ yoongi is down bad... and his notebook 😭😭

- control by @taeyohonic 

↳ idolverse au. damn a twisted universe of bangtan. yoongi’s character is a massive dick in this one

- exitus acta probat by @bang-tan-bitches

↳ mafia au. can he also snatch me away pls too

- lineage by @kosmosguk

↳ royalty au. god the twist? you gotta read this, it’s a masterpiece.

- the man in the moon by @worldwidemochiguy

↳ lowkey reading was comforting in some sort. like i was soft for yoongi’s character by the end :3

- the music of the night by @bestaez

↳ phantom of the opera au. i was smiling near the ending but then that had to happen lol

JUNG HOSEOK:

- angel by @worldwidemochiguy 

↳ best friend au. hoseok is affectionate, sweet, and insane in this one. 

- forbidden fruit by @deepdarkdelights

↳ organized crime au. mc’s lack of fear has gotten her into some trouble... but it’s jung hoseok--it’s alright!!

- may the odds be ever in your favor by @yandearest 

↳ hunger games au. this fic is incompeleted but the author left spoilers for the ending. i highly suggest checking out this fic--it’s very well written!

- orgasms on the verge of a nervous breakdown by @sluttyandere

↳ high school + party au. wow this was quite a lot to handle. pls note there’s non-con. in conclusion: trust nobody

- toska by @chummywchimmy

↳ a/b/o + werewolves au. hoseok is sweet and all but lord that bird gift LMAO. 

KIM NAMJOON:

- a dangerous game by @chaoticpuff17 

↳ mafia au. joonie does not know how to give up... prayers for the mc

- deviant by @jkeuphoriadreamland + @chimoona

↳ this fic is one of the most memorable fics i read. namjoon is so cunning and cocky piece of shit. 

- fôret de cauchemars by @kosmosguk

↳ sleep psychiatrist au. i massively agree that this fic is one hell of a rollercoaster. thrilling and creepy!!

- lady of the night by @deepdarkdelights 

↳ victorian + time travel + jack the ripper au. this joon lives in my mind to this day. enjoyed the mc figuring out what the hell is happening while scolding namjoon’s misogynistic ideas.

- let the villain win by @lemonjoonah 

↳ author au. let me tell you that joonie’s character will have you memorized and shocked!!

- moonstruck by @lovelyspring7

↳ mafia + florist au. this is fic did what it gotta do... and IT SERVED!!! 

- used to disappointment by @girlmeetsliv3

↳ nerd au. gosh i would also feel like a disappointment if i was in school with namjoon. but joonie is caring in this one (?)

PARK JIMIN:

- apothic by @jiminstonic

↳ zombie au. zombie jimin is sweet towards for the mc, but his actions went a lit extreme... ig that’s what he gotta do? slay?

- arte factum by @lolabangtan

↳ artifical intelligence + sci-fi au. fuck me up android jimin!@(31!!!! he’s a little bit eerie but we can OVERLOOK that :D

- charming by @bangtans-apollo

↳ cinderella au. *chefs kiss* prince jimin needs a therapy session because he’s very overbearing and possessive. you never know when he gotta explode!

- curiosity brought it back by catslullaby (AO3)

↳ CURIOSITY DID BRING IT BACK!!!!!! one of my all time favs. the way mc decided to make jimin jealous and she got what she wanted! but she also bargained more than what she can afford lool

- neighbors by @jkeuphoriadreamland

↳ neighbors + stalker au. toxic? yes. hot? yes.

- otherworldly by @sinning-on-a-sunday 

↳ coraline au. i am ashamed to say that i’m not mad at the ending. i would bend my knees for other jimin.

- porcelain by @deepdarkdelights

↳ dollmaker au. i’m not just screaming at jimin, i’m also screaming at the grandma.

- spirited away by @out-of-jams 

↳ spirited away au. i already watched spirited away and this fic takes it as inspiration to create something different as it own. jimin is supposed to be someone we can rely on... but the writing has good job of conveying the gut feeling of something that isn’t right :D

- the owner by @shumidehiro

↳ ghost au. i like the mc in this! love that she is respectful to the spirits and i can see how ghost jimin holds his resentment from.

- treasure by @sombreboy

↳ faerie dragon hybrid au. that took a dark turn but who can’t resist jimin? lets be REALLL

KIM TAEHYUNG:

- daffodil dreams by @sombreboy 

↳ murder suspect + therapist au. the way tae and mc are attracted towards each other is kinda in push and pull in way. and when they give into each other, it feels conflicting since it feels right but wrong for the two to be together. a thrilling read!!

- devotion by @sweetbunnykook 

↳ childhood friends au. the yearning?? the tension?? and when it blows up between the two, it’s completely worth it in the end. beautifully written!!

- dura lex, sed lex by @go1denjeon

↳ law au. tae is so mysterious in this fic. you know what you’re for when you read this, you just don’t know when tae decides to reveal his true colors. in hindsight, he acts like ordinary citizen yet ill think we’ll see more of his true colors in later chapters.

- like chalk and cheese by @helenazbmrskai 

↳ tae def helped the mc bring out the craziness in her. it’s refreshing read from most yandere fics as we start to see more of the roles reversed. 

- poison apple by @jooniyah 

↳ moneylender au. this is one of more darker fics. mc doesn’t give up nor so does tae. his character is crazy and im impressed how she keeps her sanity still. 

- purple people eater by @therealmintedmango (AO3)

↳ alien au. ik the title of this fic sounds crazy and the fic is. tae is adorable in the fic (besides the shit he pulled in the end). 

- the phantom by @darkestcorners

↳ paranormal + parallel universe/time travel au. tae’s character in this is fucking scary actually. i probably been dead by now if i was mc in that situation. 

- the treachery and reprisal by @min-hoax

↳ tae got ISSUES. and jimin??? my gasp was so damn loud at the end. that’s it. 

- violets: memories [part one] / violets: realities [part two] by @emoboijk 

↳ stalker au. tae and mc are unhealthy for each other but they still got feelings for each other... love how mc friends are there to support her :D

JEON JUNGKOOK:

- brother knows best by @cosmostae

↳ stepbrother au. jungkook is so hot and goodass smut. gulity-pleasure fic :D

- cardio by kaiseuphoria (AO3)

↳ personal trainer au. jungkook is so sweet but so insane all at once??&!6? this fic is a perfect mix of sweetness and creepiness. 

- cruel intentions by @explicit-tae

↳ mafia au. the first chapter was just recently out and i’m glad the mc got out of the situation. but since it’s the first chapter, i wonder when is jungkook going take her and the baby back? eagerly waiting for the second chapter!

- deception by @kthyg

↳ gang au. this fic is interesting in a way that mc likes jk long before jk likes her. jk gotta manage his anger and sort his shit out first. 

- flower petal by @royallyjoon 

↳ empire + reincarnation au. this two together is tragic. mc did what she gotta for everyone’s sake and that ended up... not so well many years later...

- forever afterthough by sorvette (AO3)

↳ fantasy + vampire + werewolves au + implied poly ot7 x reader. god this was a RIDE. the progress between the mc and jungkook is sweet and i enjoyed their bond together. writing felt like a kinda like dream because this is so well written!!

- play date trilogy by @worldwidemochiguy

↳  the inner turmoil within the mc between leaving and staying lets me know that jk got her bad... honestly same tho

- polarity by @darkestcorners 

↳ best friend’s boyfriend + college au. YOU GUYS WILL NOT GET IT UNTIL YOU READ THIS FIC. like i would smash my head everytime so i wipe OUT my memories and reread this fic all over again. the plot twists, the mind games, and how realistic this setting is in this fic got me fucked in all sorts of places. without being physical, jk uses all types of tactics to overtake mc’s mind. this is a must read. 

- taking over you by @go1denjeon

↳ idolverse au. love the mc’s approach this situation. jk’s character in this fic is actually fucking sick and twisted. at some parts, i just got very uncomfy and got the chills. 

- the crimson shell by @angelicyoongie 

↳ mermen au. do not think this is your friendly mermaid au. merkoo in this fic his claws, spikey teeth, and clicks his mouth to communicate. poor mc in this, she went through SHIT

- the friendly ghost by @darkestcorners 

↳ ghost au. ghostkoo is very sweet. he could never do wrong--until the end RIP :D

- to obtain the flower / primrose [sequel] by @mingshits 

↳ empire au. who knew that mc’s actions toward jk during childhood could leave a result like this lol? this fic was a whole serve, def must read. each time mc takes one step, jk is FIVE steps ahead her LMAO

- you by @whoretan 

↳ college + stalker au. the first chapter recently released and i’m invested on what’s going to happen to the next chapter. everyone’s motive in this fic is somewhat unclear and the mc here is quite unreliable. can’t wait for shit to happen 

[charmedreincarnation]

Ya bitch got into the void state

Champagne anon here and your mf girlll got in the mf void state and manifested her dream life. This happened a week ago, and I’ve been chilling but I do wanna share my story to help others. Gotta give Thanks to Maya, and so many other bloggers and even anon. Y’all hoes will forever be in my heart, and I’m forever grateful 🥹 also Maya girl you told me when I succeed to get into detail and I got nothing to do for the next two hours so imaaa just share it all here in detail.

I also wanna especially thank all the black creators on tumblr!! I didn’t know there were so many of us using the law. It always seems the world is so against us, and there’s nothing we can do abt it but nahhhh!! we can all live our best melanated lives regardless. Periodt, as we should it’s about goddamned time after everything we’ve been though 😂

Anyways!!!! after reading this: https://www.tumblr.com/charmedreincarnation/717864613626134528/im-your-bubble-anon-but-i-made-this-burner-to success story yesterday I got hella motivated. I read that shit and I thought I posted it on accident because it was everything I had been through, and had been thinking anyways. That anon ate your tumblr habits btw. If y’all haven’t seen my good sis’s sucess post go check that shut out rn, On god it will help.

At the end that anon (my mf dawg 🙏) included that they manifested for everyone. Now ion know if that shit actually work tbh. I’ve seen people say you can and can’t, but tbh the vibes were too high for me to doubt. I was like ight, okay fuck it, ima leave my dream life. Whether it me, that anon, or the devil himself ion give a fuck.

So that’s whatssss a bitch did!!! I just affirmed all day it was very fulfilling. People who hate on affirming are mad corny. I can’t lie that shit works hella fast even if you don’t believe it. Idk if that anon’s void manifesting helped or what but I didn’t do much and after 3 months of trying I entered the damn void state. I’m mad I thought I had to be on some ghandi shit to do this (no hate to him hes da man) but you rlly don’t y’all. BUT LEMME TALK MY SHIT ALL YOU NEED IS AFFIRMING AND PERSISTENCE.

Anyways I went go bed excited asl!! I wrote my script that was like 10 pages long I can’t lie I did the most… but it’s whateva. I woke up in the void state after waking up at 4 am or sum, and i was like oh shityyyt lemme manifest rq and skrttt out this hoe. So that’s what a mf did 😂😂

Anyways the part y’all’s is waiting for. This is what ya girl manifested

Desired face and body. I was in shock how all the details came to life. Y’all im a solid 100/10 it’s giving natural bbl and Aliyah. I swear to gahhh everywhere I go people be trying to peep. I’m not used to being treated like a fucking celeb everywhere I go, whole time it’s just my fat gyattttt

Being the hottest 16 yr old IT GIRL at my school, and having lucky girl syndrome. People call me a mini jayda wayda, but tbh I’m better than her now. No hoe is ever gonna cheat on meee like they did her…bye. She’s still gorgeous as fuck tho

Perfect school life. Your girl is set to be the Valedictorian when I graduate (my school has 4!) I’m also sophomore year President, captain of the basketball team, apart of some volunteer programs through my school, and so much more. My resume and college application is abt to be so fuckin fire in 2 years. As I should Columbia is a competitive ass school 😤😤 that aside everyone always tryna link, I got 3 guys fighting over me (whole damn love square), so many people tryna be my friends, teachers love me, and I excel in everything I do.

My Family being rich assss fuck. My dad got a Wikipedia now and his net worth is 22 million dollars. He owns a hedge fund company now, we love a man in finance 😍😍 AS HE FUCKING SHOULD. He got a material gurlll daughter. Two in fact now.

Fire ass crib. Bro it’s a 9 million dollar penthouse, perfect for ragers. I woke up here and my room is decorated to my personality, pintrest clothes all in my closet, I got an exotic pitbull and frenchie, and the house is just mad clean and fire, I’m obsessed with it. Rarely ever wanna leave now.

My mom not being strict. That bald headed ass hoe use to be mad annoying. Y’all know how Haitians are. Mad annoying as fuck and strict for no reason. Now I go out everyday and come home at midnight and no one gives a fuck. Everyone minds their own business as they should.

Having an older brother and younger sister. I was an only child, because I was a miracle baby bc my mom was infertile. Now she got 3 of us, so she can stop being only in my buisness. I’m just playin I love my mom regardless she’s just hella clingy. Anyways my brother is mad protective but also be wrestling mad aggressive for no damn reason. He gave me a bruise but it’s whateva Ima get my lick back. I also always wanted to be an older sister, bc I’d love to be a role model! My sister is 10 and adores me soo much it’s so adorable 🥹 lmfaooo, she’s mad spoiled by me and my mom but it is what it is.

Successful lip gloss business and being a successful drop shipper. Now you didn’t think a sista wasn’t gonna give herself a career just because I’m young right 🤨🤨 we’ll ya wrong. Ya girl is making 200k-400k a year. I barely even use my money cause I got an allowance from my parents… but still, financial literacy and wealth is so important to me especially as a black woman.

A pookie bae. Y’all know I wasn’t gonna deal with finding a loyal cute and funny guy in nyc. It’s like finding a needle in a haystack. Anyways I got me a fine ass boo. I just wrote down all the features I wanted in him like for exampleS finically secure so he can spoil me, handsome as fuck, tall, funny asl, kind, little clingy, deep raspy voice, nice hand, good hygiene and style,yanno yanooo !!! Plus some other shit and whewww the void did me so good. Nowww my boo bear is a lil cracker and I’ve never dated a white boy befuh but my am I surprised. I wake up everyday with some long ass appreciation texts and plans already made ! Y’all know I love me a dominant man who knows what he wants. He’s got some nice ass clothes, nice car and crib, made me a passenger princess and spoils me way too much. He doesn’t complain abt my mood swings and simps in the best way possible. Not to mention he’s fine afkkk he’s giving vinnie hacker. He’s also 6’1 and I’m 5’1 so that height difference is soooo hot I can’t lie I feel so so safe with him 🫣 I could go on all day but in short he’s more than perfect

+ so much more but this is what shocked me the most. Anyways I’ve been living like this for the past week and it just feel so natural. I keep forgetting I got into the void but whateva I’m the only who knows anyways. Anyways live yo best life and neva give upppp. I gotta go but I’ll probably eventually make a blog. My names angela so look out for it. I’m just mad lazy soo idk tho !!!

Angela out 🫡✌️

Girl this was so fun to read, I’m just as excited for you lmfao. I love seeing black women win, and thank you for sharing your methods! Enjoy your best life and come back if it resonates with your life bae !!!

[ask-turnedtechgodhead]

this thing on

fuck yes aight check this shit out-

DAVE, I'VE BEGRUDGINGLY COME TO UNDERSTAND THAT STANDING IN A CORNER ALONE SPEWING THE TYPE OF NONSENSICAL BABBLE ONE MIGHT EXPECT FROM A WRIGGLER IS WHAT PASSES FOR ENTERTAINMENT IN YOUR EMPTY THINK PAN.

I'VE EVEN BEGUN TO APPRECIATE IT, IF ONLY BECAUSE WE NEEDED *SOMETHING* TO FILL THE AGONISINGLY LONG SWEEP WE WERE STUCK ON THAT OTHERWISE SILENT AND YET SOMEHOW JUST AS MISERABLE FUCKING ROCK HURTLING THROUGH SPACE TOWARDS CERTAIN DEATH. BUT WHAT IN THE EVER-LOVING SHIT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING WITH THAT BULBOUS FUCKING OVERGROWTH JAMMED AGAINST YOUR RIDICULOUS EYEWEAR?

damn man i thought we covered this in our human tech 101 lessons. its a camera- I KNOW ITS A CAMERA. I WAS TRYING TO LOWER MYSELF TO YOUR LEVEL SO THAT MAYBE YOU WOULD DECIDE TO GRACE ME WITH YOUR ATTENTION AND ACTUALLY LISTEN TO WHAT I HAD TO SAY. try harder SHUT UP. AND ANSWER THE QUESTION. how the hell am i supposed to answer the question if im shutting up? cant have it both ways bro. cant just have your cake and eat it too you either eat that bitch or shut your mouth forever and starve to death- HOLY SHIT WE BOTH KNOW YOU AREN'T GOING TO SHUT UP EITHER WAY. COULD YOU AT LEAST DO ME THE MERCY OF TELLING ME WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE DOING BEFORE I DROWN IN THE PUTRID STREAM OF BULLSHIT CASCADING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH?

documentary CARE TO EXPAND UPON THAT? OR AM I NOT WORTHY ENOUGH TO GET MORE THAN ONE WORD OUT OF YOU? SHOULD I BE PROSTRATING BEFORE YOU THANKING YOU FOR DEIGNING TO GRACE ME WITH ONE WORD FROM YOUR TIGHT ASS LIPS? 'DOCUMENTARY'. TRULY A HOLY WORD. RELIGIONS WILL FORM AROUND THIS ONE WORD, DAVE. HOLY BOOKS WILL BE WRITTEN ABOUT THOSE ELEVEN LETTERS. TODAY WILL BE CELEBRATED NOT AS THE DAY WE CREATED A NEW UNIVERSE, NO- TODAY WILL BE FOREVER MARKED AS THE DAY DAVE FUCKING STRIDER SAID 'DOCUMENTARY'-

AND GET THAT FUCKING THING OUT OF MY FACE YOU NOOKWHIFFER

holy shit check it out im being censored already

karkat do you support censorship

is this what this is karkat

is this where we find out that this entire session has been your master plan to create a new world for you to go stalin on its ass

because dude im so down to create some propaganda for supreme leader vantases glorious reign

just let me finish this shit first cmon man

HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO AGREE TO THAT WHEN I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT 'THIS SHIT' IS?

i told you man

IF YOU SAY DOCUMENTARY I SWEAR-

documentary

about the creation of the new universe

no big deal or nothing just thought it could be mildly interesting to get on camera

idk ill probably tape over it later for some shitty sitcom rerun

do you think theyll have the simpsons on the new planet

god i hope they do

AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THAT IS.

troll the simpsons

YOU CAN'T JUST PUT 'TROLL' IN FRONT OF SOME PANDEAD EARTH THING AND EXPECT ME TO KNOW WHAT IT IS AND HONESTLY, I'M DOWNRIGHT FUCKING INSULTED THAT YOU'D THINK THAT ALTERNIA HAD ANYTHING EVEN REMOTELY COMPARABLE TO YOUR EYEGOUGING EXCUSES FOR 'MEDIA'. MY PLANET ACTUALLY HAD STANDARDS, UNLIKE YOUR MISERABLE PILE OF DIRT.

says the guy that was responsible for that pile of dirt

and didnt even record its creation

imagine being an absent father to a whole universe karkat. what the fuck man

thank god im here to break the cycle of abuse

OH, I'M SORRY I COULDN'T RECORD YOUR WASTE OF SPACE PLANET BEING CREATED - I WAS TOO BUSY NEARLY GETTING MURDERED BY THE MURDERBEAST *YOU*-

oh shit idiot shuts up now

thats you youre the idiot

STRIDER I SWEAR TO FUCK

dude seriously shut up

hes doing it man

hes making it hapen

=>

[yeonboy]

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐥 ♡ choi yeonjun // mlist.

After facing disappointment with love for years upon years, you have chosen to replace romance with dance in your life, dedicating your entire time to this dance academy you’re employed at. It’s not that you hate men now, you just don’t expect to fall for them anymore because all they do is break your heart. And then Choi Yeonjun enters your life as a new recruit at the academy – sweet, adorable, soft spoken, kind and younger than you. He is everything you have never found attractive in a guy before. But somehow, you're helplessly spiraling for him.

❧ choi yeonjun x f. reader | 16+ | smau ♡ comedy ♡ angst ♡ strangers to friends to lovers!au ♡ dance academy!au ♡ 98-liner!reader ♡ dancer!reader ♡ dancer!yeonjun ♡ slow burn.

❧ warnings! profanity, an ABUNDANCE of suggestive jokes, mentions of people's sex lives (or lack thereof), death & murder threats as jokes, some of the characters being assholes for no reason, reader being a commitment phobe, a lot of pining, a ton of miscommunication (hehe ofc <3), misunderstandings, unnecessary heartbreaks + more will be added as the series progresses!

❧ featuring! all of txt | jimin & jungkook (bts) | sakura & kazuha (le sserafim) | yeji & ryujin (itzy) | keeho (p1harmony) | somi (soloist, ex i.o.i).

❧ playlist! trampoline - zayn & shaed ║ easy - camila cabello ║ lavender haze - taylor swift ♪

❧ status! 23.04.23 ⇢ tba. | on-going | bi-weekly updates

notes! heyyy, guys! yes, rya smau era 2k23 hehe! i had this idea for a very angsty fic where an older reader has feelings for a younger yeonjun but can't accept it bec he's not her "type"... but when i tried to write it, it got soooo sad and heavy soooo fast that i had to give up 😭 SO! i reckoned why not attempt to do an smau w a lighter version of this concept??? let's hope this turns out okay (:

pls be kind! the last time i wrote an smau was in 2018 so my creativity's got rust in every crevice (': but constructive criticism + suggestions are more than welcome! 🫶

❧ main masterlist | inbox ⁘

profiles: [1] [2] [3]

00. intro ║ 01. more nepotism hires ║ 02. grandpa and grandma ║ 03. break a leg (but not yours) [written: 1k] ║ 04. do you like flowers ║ 05. ✨aRtTtT✨ ║ 06. let the boy feel a woman's touch ║ 07. support system ║ 08. liking people we can't have ║ 09. it IS weird ║ 10. ‼ trouble ‼ ║ 11. connecting some big ass dots ║ 12. it's a work in progress ║ 13. dance crush ║ 14. enemies to lovers ║ 15. ohhh my god i'm so stupid ║ 16. at least that’s how it began ║ 17. we're no sidehoe material ❌ ║ 18. jealousy wasn't on my bingo card ║ 19. pesky little feelings ║ 20. why do i know so much ║ 21. it should've been me ║ 22. an overthinker AND a dumbass ║ 23. everything is a mess [written: 500] ║ 24. sum chamgo love dive it is [written: 1k] || 25. feels like a funeral in here ║ 26. let's all act surprised || 27. must start breathing into a bag ║ 28. IDK DUDE IM NERVOUS ║ 29. i wasn't jumping I SLIPPED ║ 30. wdym denial ║ [tba]

taglist: @bailies-me @samisubi @forever-in-the-sky2 @captivq @jiawji @hyuneyeon @wanlore @softcabur @emohazuzworld @yjusei @marifujioka @taekwondoes @suzirumas @ohmahgods @ye0nvibezzn @mrsyawnzzn @rionah

let me know if you'd like to be added!

© yeonboy 2023 // do not steal, copy or repost. respect your local content creators, kaythanks.

[3cremepie3]

Peppermint Mocha

. Synopsis - After striking it gold you end up becoming Nami’s assistant. Well, it turns out there are a lot of perks for “working for her”.

. Warnings - 18+, cursing, public sex, power advantages, body fluids, mentions of poverty and wealth

. A/n - First part of my OP series. Thank you for reading Luffy and a Nami Drabble are next! Please read them in order or you’ll be incredibly confused. There might be some grammar mistakes in here but idc.

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“Peppermint mocha latte two extra sugars and two extra creams, light on the ice.” Take my card it’s half off on Wednesdays with the promo.” The card was already laid on her desk ready for you to take. This gave her more time to stay wrapped up in her phone. She the social media manager was probably looking for new trends. 

You wanted so desperately to say Hi to her. Nami Swan one of your idols was right in front of you! She must’ve got you mixed up with someone else. But you happily marched down to the Dunkin in the building lobby and received her order. 

You walked through the vast hallways and you were almost back to her secluded office. Then a woman rushed out of the door in front of you. In her hands was a box full of office supplies. She dropped a ruler and you were quick to help her by picking it up. 

“Thank you.” She smiled at you. “The janitors always were the nicest. I’m only sad to leave y’all,” she frowned. “Are you getting a new job,” you inquired. “Yes, I have no other choice. I can’t handle her anymore she’s crazy.” Can’t handle who?” It was your first day at the company and there was already trouble. “You’re a beautiful girl so soon you’ll understand.” But please before you go give this note to Swan.”

You took the note from her still concerned but it was too late to worry about it she went down the flash elevators and by now she would be lost. Not like you had any time to worry either Nami was still waiting. “Here you go ma’am just as you asked.” 

You sat down the coffee and the note the mysterious woman wrote for you. “Thanks, Kalifa I need it since today’s a long ass day.” She sighed before finally looking up from the screen that captivated her. “Who are you and why are you in my office?” She looked you up and down wondering how she could even mistake you. “My bad sweetie I thought you were my assistant.” 

“It’s okay no problem,” you smiled. “If I’m not mistaken she left you this letter.” You pointed to the letter you left on Nami’s desk. “The god-forsaken letters I’ve got 4 of this month,” She sighed. 

She took a sip of her coffee while reading. “We’ll looks like I’m out of an assistant for the 4th time this year. That’s a record of mine,” she chuckled. Who in their right mind wouldn’t work for you?” Oh honey 24 others!” They always leave after realizing the extent of work that we do. They think it’s just sunshine and rainbows. Then the documents and endless coffee orders come.” 

“And im stuck with no two weeks notice.” Wow I’m sorry about that Miss that is so unprofessional. If I worked here under you it would be a dream come true! Your eyes lit up at the thought. “But you do work here other wise you wouldn’t be in my office.” 

“But I’m just a janitor that doesn’t count for much.” So you really want to work here huh,” She asked. “Yes it’s been a dream of mine forever I loved your guy's toys.” Well, you are already in my room now and I have no assistant.”

“Why don’t you just fill in until I can get another one?” But I’m not trained in that position I wouldn’t want to mess up.” Don’t worry about it I’ll teach you the ropes. Come on just say yes it’s more fun than cleaning after all these people who already have ocd anyways.” She finished up her coffee in between words giving you extra time to think about things. 

“Yes,” you squealed. “Okay then let’s go back downstairs then. My coffee order is wrong.” Oh no, I’m sorry,” you frowned. “It wasn’t your fault it was those idiots downstairs.” Nami stood up towering past you into a door in the corner of her office. It opened up to a second lobby this one was empty and adorned with wooden statues.

“So pretty!” You marveled while feeling the handcrafted piece. “Franky made those he’s an expert carpenter.” Wow, the Frankie! He’s an icon  I remember watching him on TV when I was younger.” 

“How old are you sweetheart you say that like it was a while ago?” You arrived past all the wood displays and into a private elevator. It was small and only big enough to fit about 3 people. It felt even more suffocating with Nami so close to you. 

Her perfume smelled nice like tangerine and tulips. “I’m 19 about to be 20,” you bragged. “Wow if only I was that young again,” Nami laughed. “Well, how old are you?” 

“Don’t you know it’s rude to ask a woman her age,” she scoffed. “Sorry ma’am.” I’m only joking I’m 40 honey about to be 41,” she groaned. “You don’t look a day over 20,” you gasped. “Haha don’t flatter me,” she blushed. She walked out of the elevator after it landed on the first floor. 

“It’s not flattery I’m serious,” you trailed after her. “Wow, we got here quick.” You were already approaching Dunkin. Nami speed walked ahead of you irritated about her coffee. “Camie.” She yelled out at a green-haired employee who was behind the counter. “How many times do I have to tell you liquid sugar.”

“I can’t even drink this without having to swirl it around because nothing dissolved.” You’re lucky I like you or I would fire you on the spot,” she spat. Nami had a temper on her that you didn’t want to cross. But she was hot when she was mad the way her eyebrows furrowed and her cheeks turned red was probably the closest face to the one she would make while degrading you. 

“Stop y/n,” you spoke aloud. “What was that,” Nami asked. “Nothing!” You straightened up god you were gay! “Really you look a little funny,” she teased. “I’m fine!” Okay if you say so. You know what Y/n let’s just go I’m tired of coffee because a certain someone always gets my order wrong.”

You heard the other women working at the cafe laugh at Nami’s joke. The green-haired girl smiled too embarrassingly. “Where are we going, Ma’am.” You asked following after the sound of Nami’s pumps. You were too distracted by the gold carvings along the marble floor to look up. And by the time you did you bumped into someone. 

“Are you alright honey?” You looked up to see no other than Nico Robin. “I-I I’m f-fine,” you blurted. “I’m sorry oh my god are you hurt anywhere?” I wouldn’t forgive myself if you were.” You checked for any scruffs on her. 

“I’m sure she’s fine Y/n,” Nami interrupted. “Nami’s correct I received no damage,” Robin agreed. “That’s good,” you huffed. “Is this one of your friends Nami?” She’s my new assistant starting today! Isn’t she just lovely?”

“Yes at first I thought she was a janitor.” You looked down at yourself humiliated that you forgot to take off your uniform. “Yeah, it’s a new policy my employees can wear whatever they please.” You sure it’s new,” Robin interjected. “Before I could’ve sworn I saw one of them wearing vibrating panties.”

Nami scoffed crossing her arms. “While that’s her business I couldn't do anything to stop her.” You could if you were the one controlling them.” The whole time they bickered you stood there in between the two of them. “Ahem,” you coughed. “I thought we were gonna leave.” 

“Oh yes let’s go Y/n maybe I’ll pick you up a pair of those panties since they’re a part of our uniform,” she smirked. Nami walked off and waved bye to Robin who gave you a warm smile back. “Eeek,” you squealed. “I just met Nico Robin!”

“I’m not getting the hype Y/n.” She’s one of the most important people in this company! She’s also one of the dreamiest,” you drooled. “I can’t disagree with those statements.” Nami rolled her eyes. You guys made it outside of the lobby now you stood waiting while she called for her car back from the valet. 

Her driver opened up the door for you both and you hoped in the back after her. “Where going to the mall drop us off at the side entrance,” she instructed. The driver shook his head and started off. You looked out the window of the unfamiliar area. You had of course heard of the MerryGo corporation but you had never set foot around the boogie area. 

Even with your Sunday best on people could still probably tell that you were an outsider. “Why did you want to work at our company Y/n?” Your guy's toys saved me when I was younger I want to spread that joy to other children.” 

“Aww, that’s so sweet.” Thanks, it was hard to find any work so I had to settle on being a janitor.” We are in high demand this year well at least you got promoted.” Yeah, I would’ve never expected this.”

“And another question. Are you a lesbian I got some vibes back when you talked about Robin?” You laughed at her randomness even though you could tell she was serious. “I’m sorry! It’s just that was sudden but no I’m Pansexual.” Oo so you like a bit everything,” she assumed. 

“Yeah pretty much!” Why wouldn’t I when there’s so much beauty in the world.” Tittes,” she responded. You both chuckled as she gave no context. “And pussy,” she added. “Even though you gave nothing I understand.” Women really are top tier.” 

After what felt like hours of talking about tits you arrived at the mall. “Let’s stop at Nordstrom first.” You walked over taking her purse to unburden her. “There’s no need for that.” I have to start acting like your assistant somehow.”

“I’ve done nothing so far.” Well then okay thanks for taking my bag those cross bodies do dig into your shoulder a bit.” I know that's why I use backpacks they’re immature but so cute.” Well, there’s some of them in Nordstrom maybe you’ll see something you like.” 

“I hope so,” you cheered. You guys walked into the store a sales assistant quickly followed after the both of you. “Hello is there anything you’re looking for in specific today?” Yes, we need form-fitting button-down tops.” Okay, right this way!” You followed after the lady through rows and rows of mediocre clothing. 

Nothing was catching your eye you had a peculiar style. A style-only thrift store with random selections would fuel. “What about this one Y/n? You can even wear it without a bra and it’ll still give you lift.” She held it up to your chest. “It’s cute.” You shifted around wanting to get out of the store. 

“You know I can tell when you’re lying right.” Her face dropped. “I’m sorry I just have a very different style from typical office wear.” Hmm okay, so what do you like?” You took this time to pull out your Pinterest. “If only I had an app like this when I was your age I would’ve saved so many fashion disasters.” 

“There’s a store I think you’d like it is across the street, however.” I don’t mind walking.” You were so excited since Nami had great fashion taste. Her tight business set and tall pumps gave her such a sexy secretary look. “Look both ways before you cross the street.” She held out her arm which blocked you from walking further. 

You must’ve been too busy staring at the way she strutted across the crosswalk because a car almost ended you. “Thank you I definitely was not paying attention.” God, please don’t tell me my assistant is an airhead.” I am not,” you pouted! You jogged across the remainder of the sidewalk. 

You and Nami arrived at the boutique she was talking about. The display windows were filled with intra-quit blouses that spilled off the tall mannequin figure. “Wow, it’s perfect!” I knew you’d like it,” she smiled. 

You walked in and explored like a child in a candy shop. “Y/n over here.” She called you to their formal wear section. “Pick up whatever you want I’ll be waiting in the dressing rooms for you,” she instructed. “Okay.” A sales clerk helped you further holding the large amount of shirts you picked up. 

Finally, once you were done you moved everything over to the dressing room. “Wow this is like all those movies,” you giggled. “What do you mean? Nami looked at you confused. “Like the type of dressing room in movies. Where the bride finds the dress that’s the one.” 

“Oh, I get it well welcome to luxury.” A woman stepped in with the both of you. “Hi I’m Perona I’ll be your seamstress for today.” Her cold hands ghosted over your arms spreading them out. You stood there for a couple minutes getting measured. You giggled every time she got too close you couldn’t help it. 

The only time someone had been this close to you was when you got kissed. “You’re so sensitive Y/n,” Nami teased. “I finished measuring it’s time to try out what you picked.” I picked up so many Ms. Nami can you pick for me?” Sure how about that skirt with the ruffles.” Perona handed you the skirt. At first, you were nervous to undress in front of them but they assured you that they had seen it all before. 

Luckily you had worn some decent panties today. “Cute panties I love the cherries,” Nami complimented. “Stop looking,” you blushed. She laughed a bit at your timidness. “You’re too cute sweetie now let’s see that skirt.” 

It was a perfect fit but one thing bothered you. “It’s like a belt so cute,” Nami pointed out. It was so short your ass almost hung out. But after twirling around in the mirror you did realize you looked amazing. 

“Is it too tight,” Perona asked? “No, it’s good.” I’m glad you’re such a cool boss Nami. Any other office place would fire me on the spot if I was wearing this.” There are pros to working for me,” she mentioned. Perona handed you some other skirts most of them being what Nami picked for you. 

You realized one thing. She liked to see you in skin-tight leather. You even got a matching body suit and jacket set. “I look like a biker.” Your hands traced up the zippers that went from your bust to your ass. “It’s so hot in all this leather,” you groaned. Nami got up and started towards you. “That’s why you have these.” Her hands unzipped your body suit. The breeze immediately hit you sending goose bumps up your spine.

“Biker chics are the hottest,” she joked. “And so are businesswomen,” you blurted. Nami was right in front of you her hands ghosting your waist. “Wanna know who’s hotter than a biker chic?” Sure.” A naked one,” she admitted. “Why don't I help you strip down, she offered. Her legs rubbed together ever so slightly awaiting your response. “Come on let the girls breathe,” she smirked. “Can you do it for me my hands are broken all of a sudden.” 

“Of course anything for you.” Her hand dragged down your stomach then it bunched up the remainder of the body suit. She pulled you closer to her so close that she could feel your rapid heartbeat. Your eyes darted anywhere but hers as she pulled your shirt up.

A hiss fell from your lips as both her hands wrapped around your shoulders to your back unloosing your bra strap revealing your tits on full display. “Fuck,” she mumbled. “I could take you right now if there wasn’t that woman and the ghost of nosy employees watching.” 

“Ugh I hate pda,” Perona groaned as she walked in. “If you have enough money to buy all this you have enough money for a damn hotel.” She was right and Nami knew so too but she was Nami. “Shut up bitch I’ll give you 5 thousand right now if you give us some alone time.” She stepped out of the room accepting Nami’s offer. 

“I need a taste of my new assistant.” Now you understood what Kalifa the frantic woman you met earlier was trying to relay to you. As soon as the door closed Nami began to palm at your tits. She massaged the soft mounds like they were freezing and needed to be warmed up despite how hot your body was becoming. You felt the need to strip from the other layer that held your heat. That being the panties she complimented earlier. A string of your wetness followed them to the floor.  

Her leg that was adorned with her nylon stockings went in between your thighs rubbing against your drooling pussy. “This is the best day ever,” you moaned. Nami’s lips wrapped around yours silencing your excited pleas. The kiss was hot and intoxicating enough for you to not realize that she backed you against the wall. You were sure to smudge the mirror with your body that now glistened in a layer of sweat. 

Your arms tugged at Nami’s blazer until you pulled it off. Her hands worked on her skirt and yours went to her tight polo pulling it over her head. You messed up her neat curls but she could care less. She had her new meal right in front of her. She had you someone who was untainted by the MerrryGo company. So she couldn't let you go. She kissed you again giggling into your mouth. 

The beef she had with Robin was mostly one-sided but she still couldn't help but to brag about this lay later. “What is so funny,” you asked. “The fact that Robin was right. Don't worry sweetie this time is so different I want to keep you.” And it seems like you need me.” She was right about that you were ready to pounce on her. She held your hand and led you to the couch she just watched you try clothes on. 

She patted her lap and you sat on it. Her hand wrapped around your throat knocking out any of the airflow that you barely had before because you were choked up by her beauty. “Wanna try something? As my assistant, you need to be adventurous.” Sure, you gulped”. Get on top of the couch and spread your legs.” You hesitated but she gave you a reassuring look. 

You did as you were told and she quickly followed you her mouth meeting your clit as the couch dipped at her weight. Even after the first stroke of her soft muscle, you felt like you could collapse. But you stayed grounded as you would never want this experience to end in a million years. One of her hands slipped from your waist and into her own underwear. She began to play with herself in time with the many moans you were letting out. 

“Ah that feels good,” you cried out. Her tongue inserted your fluttering hole that kept spurting out your arousal. “You taste so good, she mumbled. “I can eat you forever my sweet girl.” Her praise was definitely mending your ego as well. It had been so long since someone was this nice to you. She took care of you well not spilling a drop of your cream.

“I paid for this you can be as loud as you want.” She was right but you still could imagine what the employees were hearing. So your moans were held back. That was until she inserted a finger inside of your inviting entrance. You practically screamed at the sudden and calculated move. “Ms. Nami ahh that feels so good. To good fuck! You exclaimed as she moved faster. Her pretty face and hair were sure to be messy as she was so sloppy in pleasuring you. So was her pussy as she began to scissor herself focusing on her sweet spot. 

Her moans sent vibrations into you further bringing you closer to the edge. Your legs couldn't take it anymore you were going numb. Your back arched sending you down onto the seat of the couch. Nami’s mouth followed you not latching off. “So go damn hot.” You turned around admiring the sight of the woman that was about to come undone just from eating you. 

She looked up her eyes meeting yours. You could feel her smiling as she came undone wetting the cushion underneath her. Two of her fingers curved inside of you bumping against your sweet spot. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head from the pleasure. “Do I really feel that good?” Yes! You were quick to respond not having any more breath left to say anything. 

She knocked the air out of your lungs. And as you came you became a light-headed hyperventilating mess. Your eyes closed tightly together as you rode out your orgasm on her greedy tongue. Flashes of what Kalifa said went through your mind. But you couldn't afford to care after you just got the best head of your life. 

“Y/n you okay?” Yes, you exhaled.” Your head was banging as there was no blood flowing into it. Nami helped you to get redressed and you walked out of the dressing room. Employees stared at you both obviously fucked up girls. Perona even laughed as Nami paid for your items. You knew the store was a boutique but damn the clothes were expensive.

Not to mention the 5 grand Nami promised to pay her on top of everything. “Jesus.” You winced after seeing the total was 12 thousand dollars. “This is little money for me sweets Don't worry about it.” She swiped her black card and paid with no problem. Her arm was still around you helping to lead your shaky body. “Wanna pick up your actual uniform or do you want them sent to your house like the clothes.”

“What do you mean actual uniform?” The vibrating panties, she reminded you.” I thought that was just something Robin made up.” Nope, they are the real deal.” That and my peppermint mocha are something you'll be hearing about often.” 

[collegetennisoriginstory]

ALLIEEEEEEEE!!!!! Just finished the update HOLY SHIT!!!!!!

[Mandatory spoiler warning here]

OMG SAM!!!!!!! MY LIL BESTIE IS HERE AGAINNNN!!! AND WE MATCHIEESSS <3 SAM MY SCRUNKLYWUNKLY ❤️🩷 YOU BET UR ASS I CHOSE THE "NO THOUGHTS HEAD EMPTY, SOUL CRUSHING HUG" OPTION!!! AHH I AM WHOLE AGAIN, SAMMYWHAMMY, MY SAMWISE, MY LIL GUY!!

I love how sam is immediately adopted as part of the cheering squad 😂 Im just imagining diego and Addie going 'one of us!! One of us!!! One of us!!!' At sam and just merges em into the group like theyve always belonged there 😭 I knew sam and diego would be instant besties!! I love G and Sam too!! Though I guess I didnt flirt enough with G to trigger any sort of jealousy between G and Sam. But its fine, Ive found that G as a platonic friend is also very sweet and I honestly kinda prefer it for my MC!! (Who will cry themself stupid when G has to leave 😔)

Speaking of jealousy, I absolutely LOVE Rayyan being sooo jealous the whole chapter lmaooo like yes bby frown those beautiful eyebrows... oh, MC is wearing someone else's last name to their first season debut???? Ohh u are seething... who is MC seeing so badly that theyre holding up the game?? Who is MC waving at?? I cant wait to introduce Sam to the team 😊 hopefully they would be able to go home unscathed <3

ALSO the tension after the match with Rayyan!!!! UGH I WANNA LIVE IN THAT SCENE FOREVER GOD ITS SO---- The restraint, the longing, the 'i want them so bad but causing a scandal by making out sloppy toppy at ur first match is probably NOT GOOD, but im this 🤏 close to risking it all'...

It's so woefully inadequate, so woefully incongruent with the way he's looking at you, that you're a whisker away from growling in frustration and stepping in to kiss him in front of the entire Cargill crowd.

THIS IS MY FAVORITE LINE OMG!!!! AND THE WAY RAYYAN JUST GRABS UR HAND AND HUGS U INSTEAD!!! I AM FERAL. LIKE ITS SO SO SO SOFT BUT ITS SUCH POOR SUBSTITUTE TO WHAT U ACTUALLY WANTED HUH RAYYAN??? ..... one of these days I might do a slowburn Rayyan route, but sadly Im a board certified thirsty hoe, so...

Btw I also chose the non heart hug option and ITS SO SOFT???? I LOVE THEM BEING SOFT??? LIKE "u only get to hug me once okay? 😤" "once per match?? 😊🥰🥺🤗" MC SO CUTE GOT RAYYAN GIGGLIN AND BEING MAD CUTE AND SHIT

AND OH DONT GET ME STARTED WITH 'THE LOCKER ROOM PART 3: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO' SCENE. I AM DEVOURING RAYYANS SOUL, I AM BITING DOWN, CHOMPING. THOSE LOCKERS HAVE SEEN SO MUCH SHIT I AM SO SORRY LOCKERS I LOVE U. I WILL NEVER GET TIRED OF LOCKER ROOM KISSES I HOPE IT GETS TO LOCKER ROOM PART 587

Anyways sorry about being unhinged at u, it is born out of love for ur incredible work, I hope the surgery goes well <3 rest up, sending u loads of love, Allie ❤️❤️

Hahahaha I LOVE your excitement omg this absolutely made my week!! Definitely read this one more than a couple times :)))

G is not really the jealous type, but there is a difference in their reaction to Sam and MC if MC has been flirting with G... though the more pronounced reaction comes from Sam if MC flirts with G in front of them.

As for Rayyan... yes. They definitely are the competitive type, both when it comes to tennis and. Well. Romance.

Glad you enjoyed some of the interactions between the ROs/characters in the update, it was a lot of fun getting to write some of these dynamics after building up to them in earlier chapters. A personal fave was writing Tobin's locker room scenes, and G/Rayyan being soft, and Sam's reunion :)

Finally, I have lots of Sam/hallmate interactions planned for the weekend, so stay tuned for that!!

Thanks so much again for the message and so glad you enjoyed the update!

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

pit babe ep 12 stray thoughts

- kentapeteway here we goooo. oh OH??? i need so much more of them you dont understand

- peteway really hitting like pete just wants to help them get out 😕

- this sad ass guitar plucking

- PETE CAN READ MINDS HIM AND WAY ARE LIKE FUCJING FOILS

- peteway really hitting might have to pop over to ao3

- WHO IS TONY GONNA SELL

- jeff’s “aww you’re not too old to give it your all” mdmdjentjrj

- does x hunter have no money cause alan lives alone in a mansion, be honest

- the way north looks at sonic makes me want to eat my computer. he’s constantly shooting his shot good for him

- these absolute clowns. throwing apples at him then bringing up charlie like do you want him to be miserable lmao

- babe’s having kitty thoughts rn isn’t he

- kim being dragged around like the distant cousin who came to see is taking me out i love this lil group NOT THE CHASE

- i’m obsessed with the piano track playing during this conversation does anyone know if they released which instrumentals they use in the soundtrack

- jeff getting kidnapped AGAIN is wild

- idk how i feel about the zipper on kenta’s outfit it looks uncomfy. oh is he having a change of heart? kenta growth moment?? oh no tony saw. his desperate ass is calling winner isnt he....

- pete and way trying their hardest to convince babe kenta can change vs kenta walking in and vowing not to change lol

- will not be commenting on kenta and how he was raised or the cycle or the way he looks at tony or or or or

- he got kenta on the floor crying TONY YOU WILL CRUMBLE

- not the “i’ve never seen you as a son i raised you as a dog” ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

- winners cringe ass is here, someone needed to show him kindness or maybe have gay sex with him and let him have control in a safe environment idk i just know he’s not gonna make it more than a few hours god it’s getting desperate for these guys

- i’m really loving way after losing everything, like this man has changed at a fundamental level i dont know what he'll do next i dont know if he knows what he'll do next he has lost himself he has found the person he thought was gone forever....

- DID WINNER MAKE YHR NOISE OF THE CAR DOOR OPENING HELPP DJEJDJJKEKSK

- and he’s a bulls fan ekejjrjriekek

- why is way just standing there watching babe get his ass kicked go mind control

- kim off to the side sadly staring in space while everyone else talks is so funny to me

- babe and pete in sweats for their heist vs way in his fashion jacket

- winner shut up tony is gonna throttle you

- babe rotting from the inside over missing charlie:

way and his loafers: what are we

- i love tony’s little baby hairs im sorry but they’re kinda hot….

- if Pete and way try hard enough can they explode tony with their minds, like if they work as a team

- babe always getting his head smashed like he should just wear his raceing helmet all the time

ahhhh things are going down next ep!!!!!

[knoxvilleforever]

Visiting the County Fair with Johnny Knoxville Headcanons

request: @ilovejknoxville A knoxville x f!reader where he takes you on a date to a local fair in Tennessee or just some random country county fair, you cannot tell me this man would not love immersing you in all things country when he gets the chance( im deeply in my southern knoxville brainrot week right now🖐🏻)

johnny taking you to tennessee was the most excited you had ever been

you loved seeing where he was from

and wanted to embrace every minute

the way his accent came back when he was visiting

lord have mercy

he wanted to show you every part of his life

so when he saw the county fair was happening when you were visiting

oh boy was he excited

you’d never seen a smile on his face that big before

he wants to do everything

‘sweetheart c’mon! we gotta go axe throwing!’

you actually kick his ass

and he’s never been so turned on

‘i guess i should be disappointed but that was so hot.’

he’s a serious big kid at heart

he’ll hold your hand and drag you along to everywhere he wants to go

‘please can we do this?’

‘have you seen this? they gotta a rodeo!’

‘i am begging you pj. please, just this once. just observe the rodeo.’

you def have to buy matching cowboy hats for the rodeo

it’s your idea

but johnny is 100% on board

he makes you try some of the best food you’ve ever had in your life

he won’t settle to just eat one thing

you’ve got to try everything

he tells you how they have a competition every year to win the best food at the fair

and he believes you two are the best judges for that

so you’ll spend the entire day eating

he surprises you with cotton candy

he loves how excited you get at the cattle shows

‘cows! oh my god johnny look!’

‘i see ‘em, honey.’

he loves how excited you are about every aspect of his hometown

‘we’re moving here. it’s where i belong.’

‘i can’t believe you didn’t take me here sooner!’

if there’s a mechanical bull

there’s no way you’re missing out

you’re actually dragging johnny over there

and you put him to shame with how long you last before you’re thrown off

you’re almost crying with laughter

and he really has never been more in love

‘did you see that?!’

‘i already knew you could ride, sweetheart.’

takes you on the ferris wheel

he’s so romantic he slips the guy a few bucks so you stop at the top

just so he can kiss you

dances with you in the crowd when there’s live music on

people comment on how unbelievably cute you look

the two of you are in this bubble that you wish you could live in forever

at the end of the day you both sit cuddled up together to watch the fireworks

and when you’re wrapped in his arms, back leaning against his chest

you don’t think you’ve ever been happier

‘i love you so much, pj.’

‘you had a good time today, right? i wasn’t just dragging you around all day?’

‘are you kidding? we’re coming back tomorrow!’

[curltee]

(my bros commentary while watching THC1 )

"Are those his dogs? Hes crying cuz its badly photoshopped"

"Crying while carrying a whole ass gun"

"Bitch thats the point of a present"

"Whats this suspicious nightclub theyre going to."

"Does she know how phones work?

"Shes the dumb bitch in this group"

"Straight up, the drama team needs to learn how to take phone calls like he does. Fake phone calls"

"Um whys he looking like that when he injects her?"

"The sexual tension of this scene right now...wild. Pls tell me rn that this is secretly a torture porn???"

"Ofcourse hes gonna take it personally you twig"

"He can be a gardener"

"What a gentlemen, he even carries him"

"Dang he got a screamer here. And i thought those two girls were bad enough"

"Im sorry i just cant get over the shape of his fucking head"

"Hes like attractive, but in a creepy way"

"jenny gives me the mom come pick me up im scared deal"

"Can we appreciate that he has the decency to not hit the women. Yeah straight up he just awakens them so calmly. with the girls its like "hi besutiful goodmorning!" Then just fucking smack the guy on the face

"Id rather let him wake me up by smacking me than creepily stroke my hair like that"

"Why not hit that glass with your butt?"

"Why is he apologizing for not shooting her?"

"Oh my god shes really is the dumbest bitch alive. I thought jenny was but no"

"Fuck both jenny and the asian dude bitch runnn"

I could watch somebodys head cut off but not a butt removal"

"Okay but why the guy who screams alot placed at the front ???"

"Dang should have put jenny at the front to get a head action. unless hes into dudes"

"Do you think he has sex with it? If so which end would he prefer more? Or do you think he sees it as innocent but creepy way? Like this is my centipede child i love you"

"If he gives them painkillers does he only have the choose one but triple the amount of painkillers?"

Poor girls, one is literally eating her friends ass...forever"

"Okay so..nazi european madman. kamikaze shithole..What racial slur would be next"

"His chicken noise reminds me of squilliam"

"Is he dying? Oh shitting my bad."

"Did he atleast take their tongues out? or do they taste everything? Thats jsut nasty "

"OHH NIPPLE HELL YEAH"

"These dudes are definitly not trained to be cops. They just claimed they are on a random day "

"Why do they dressed like our uncles?"

"MAKE HIM FALL MAKE HIM FALL WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE HIM LIKE THAT YOU IDIOT".

"Out of all stairs why the spiral ones"

"A wild human centipede 🎶 got chased by a doctor 🎶 will the centipede make it🎶 or get eaten alive 🎶 find out in our next episode of planet earth"

"Oh yeah hes licking it. thats gross"

"He really just crawled themselves into a room with no plan. its going good so far"

"So did she just assume the glass was still broken. Does she have no concept of time. Probably not "

"The amount of grunts they had to record for this"

"Thats a deep cut"

*Heiter got shot* "Thats satisfying"

"Annnnd shes dead. or passed out atleast. Oh no shes really dead"

"I swear they hold eachothers hands very much"

"Oh they shot this scene really well. Like the angle and everything. Props to her can translate dread into her eyes. This is makes me sad."

"Imagine being in the middle and your counterparts are fucking dead. Thats gonna be her motto is she survives this"

[babydrummer]

hellooo ,,, (evil smirk)

i’m so very curious as to what rainworld is as i’ve only been exposed to it through tumblr and tumblr alone; and to be frank it looks very intriguing and very confusing. ok basically what i’m saying is that if you wanna infodump abt rainworld onto me.. please do i’m a little lost

OH MY GOD MOOR you've activated my trap card i am legally obligated to ramble about rainworld. alright. SO

rain world lore is very. VERY vague and cryptic. even i don't know the whole story n i used to be obsessed with this game so i may or may not be getting this all wrong. but here's the jist.

thats you. you are a slugcat. a fucked up little guy half goop and half kitty. you just happened to be exploring the world with your lovely little slug family when WOOPS it started raining real bad and you accidentally got separated. now you're alone. and at the very bottom of a very brutal food chain.

the world you inhabit is INCREDIBLY FUCKED. essentially, no one here can die. ever. you exist inside a horrible cycle of death and rebirth. it sucks. if you get eaten you wake up the next day just fine. kill the annoying predator lurking outside your den? he's fine. this continues for forever (probably.)

a billion or so years before you existed, there were these people(?) called the architects (? i think?) and they really wanted to die. they had built a great utopian society blah blah blah and now they wanted to die. so they built these MASSIVE computers called iterators and were like "heyyyy lol. please figure out a way to kill us. please"

and the iterators (who are sentient by the way) were like "okay bet" and got to work thinking. but the architects got really bored of waiting and kept searching for their own way to die and eventually, they FOUND SOMETHING. at the very bottom of the world there was this weird substance known as void and if you jumped into it you WOULDN'T BE REBORN.

the architects were like "hooooly shit we're fucking free" and a lot of them jumped in. but turns out the Void has a TERMS AND CONDITIONS. turns out there's this thing called karma and i have no clue how it works but if you had too much / too little karma the Void would spit you back out as a weird eldritch creature cursed to never live or die again.

the architects were mildly freaked out by this and no one really knew how to deal. they kept the iterators running to try and figure out an alternative to jumping into the Void but eventually the architects were like fuck it and killed themselves via void anyway.

a billion years passed. probably. i dont know. but in that timeframe, the iterators made a group chat (im not kidding) between like the 8(??? i forgot how many) of them and were like "heyy lol you guys made any progress on figuring out how to die" "nope lol." this continued for a while.

BUT THEN SUDDENLY. one of the iterators was like "HOLY SHIT I FIGURED IT OUT" and then fucked died. and everyone else was like "HOOOOLY SHIT?????" but no one else could figure it out. and this kinda spurred the iterators on a little more (i think.)

eventually this is where YOU come in. you meet two of the iterators, Looks to the Moon and Five Pebbles, (yes they have strange names dont worry about it they dont mean anything) and while Moon is too run down to properly communicate (in the normal route), Pebbles is like "man lol i don't know what you want you fucking cat weirdo. if you wanna die there's this void thing i guess."

so you saunter your goopy ass down to the void and jump in. and die. and you have a vision of your family. all is well in the world (?????????)

AND THAT'S JUST THE BASICS FOR THE NORMAL ROUTE. THERE ARE FOUR MORE. AND THEY'RE ALL STUPIDLY COMPLICATED. I LOVE IT.

also the reason rain world is called rain world is because every now and then it rains so bad it floods the entire world. it turns out that rain is coming from the iterators. they are apparently SO BIG that the water they use to cool themselves evaporates into CLOUDS THAT CAUSE FLOODS.

also in one section of the game you get to crawl through their systems and eat their neurons. which is cool.

[josephtrohman]

hello it’s the joe fic anon!! i don’t think i mind what sort of pov or what pairing, like i love combinatorics because i Adore the “pining idiots” sorta trope, so i would happily read more of those guys being obsesssd with joe (because you know. me too brother). but also because i haven’t read much joe perspective i would happily try that too. i know this literally doesn’t narrow it down AT ALL lmao so no hurry, whatever u provide will feed me good ❤️

heehee ok i got u anon!!!! as a joegirl god the more descriptors of how in love with joe the protag is the better bc YEAG ARGGG (just one part of why combinatorics will forever be my favest like ME TOO PATRICK!!!!!!) but anyways here is my tailored fic recs based on u wanting joe-centric fics :D there is some overlap ofc with my other recs posts and i just realized that most of these recs are just joe pov MORE PINING OVER JOE IN FICS PLS FANFIC AUTHORS THANK U!!!! but there is some of that here too still (combinatorics always the king for that tho). sorry this took a couple days shoutout to finals szn but JOE-CENTRIC FICS COMING RIGHT UP

joetrick:

technology by rosiedoesfic. i’m due in for a reread very soon but it’s a wonderful story about joe and patrick both being single at 30 and joining a dating app and being each other’s road test for dating. written for the same prompt as combinatorics so they’re like sister fics in my mind!!! :)

friction in your jeans by dogboytrohman. hello. one of the tags says gratuitous descriptions of how beautiful joe is and it’s true. patrick has a crisis when joe first gets his lip pierced and they kiss and mess around

thnks fr th knckrs by rosiedoesfic. joe slowly pulling patrick into the world of being interested in panties and my godddddd it’s so good!!!

token by gigantic. joe’s pov, but he’s on a mission to have gay sex, and he has to face a few unsuccessful times before he can finally fulfill his dream ;3 soooo good

brace yourself and find a safe place by distortedmya. joe comes out as an adult, and when he’s struggling a bit patrick spends time with him. very sweet read!!!

good fortune by heyginger. a short very fluffy new year’s centered fic. no spoilers since it’s short ;)

message in a bottle by bunnytrohman. joe realizes he’s in love with patrick during 2ourdust, i keep recommending this one because i love it sm and i was lucky enough to be able to get to beta for richie on this one!!

wentzman:

the things we do by gigantic. joe stays with pete for a few days and helps him get rid of some of ashlee’s stuff and pete likes to wear her clothes, and basically joe and pete start fucking. a lot. it’s joe pov so no pete pining over joe or anything but oh my god pls read it, it is so impeccably written!!! probably my fav wentzman fic ever

when you wake up the world will come around. kid fic about pete and joe being dads that fall in love. another one of my fav wentzman fics UGH so good so cute. another joe pov btw (i believe!!! it’s been a minute since i reread this one)

eyeliner = consent by arsenic. ryan ross has a scheme to get joe and pete to sleep with each other by making patrick put eyeliner on joe so as to seduce pete. it’s a wild-ass concept but im obsessed also PETE POV if i remember correctly

ok i think im going to stop there for now, BUT the nice thing about joetrick fics (and wentzman but ppl have never just asked for wentzman recs lol) is that they’re pretty inherently joe-centric so if you get the itch for more beyond these ones, i have two other posts of fic recs on my blog already!!! here and here. some of the fics i’ve recommended here can be found there too, but there are others that are excellent choices in those posts as well!!! i’m also always here to chat about fics beloved anon, and i can try to dig through my archive even more if u happen to need more recs :3 now go forth and enjoy joe centric fics :D 💖

[deadwriter16]

a list of my funniest gdoc titles + the fics they belong to

aka sneaky way to promote my fics since i haven't written in forever

see blog header: i think im hilarious.

*spits flowers at ur feet* FIX THIS - self explanatory

bkg becomes a therapist pt. 2 - there is no part 1

big ouch, pt 1 - there is no official part 2, but i have written many more fics that can be classified as big ouch

fuck ap exams - i posted this i believe the day before my ap euro exam. i have taken many more ap exams since then. this statement still stands.

denki kaminari has absolutely no fear - change my mind

go shawty its your birthday - i wrote this for someones birthday

for the love of god deku tell people when your birthday is - self explanatory

deku doesn't remember the river - also self explanatory

deku get your shit together - also self explanatory

you devious licked my heart - the trend was going on at this time

hello, homewrecker - the line i wrote basically this whole fic off of

i like dick, just not up my ass, 2 - there is a part 1 actually

if u guys make out on the counter ONE MORE TIME - there was no making out on the counter in this fic

im gonna marry this dude i just met - self explanatory

stfu u punk ass bitch - best line ive ever written

take a shower, deku - he rly needed a shower ok

togadeku canon confirmed - self explanatory

why do i take requests again - i don't anymore so

you can be a hero without a quirk! anyway, here's a quirk :) - self explanatory

*kacchan, wielding a chainsaw* GAAAAY MARRIAGE - i have no explanation for this one honestly. i used a community quote as the gdoc title for my new girl au bc i was feeling unhinged ig

[serve-cunt]

HIIII ZOE ITS MY IRRITATING ASS AGAIN (this is my main blog, I have tennis and f1 sideblogs but don't know how to make the ask come from there, I haven't been on tumblr in FOREVER..)

anyway my little curious gremlin ass has YET MORE QUESTIONS

ALSO I COMPLETELY FORGOT CHALLENGERS WAS COMING OUT, IM SO DAMN EXCITED FOR THAT FUCK YEAH, we LOVE zendaya she's gonna serve (pls laugh) cunt

okay so i think picking out my favourite players will be easier if I relate them back to f1 drivers, makes em seem more familiar, so if I do like a checklist of sorts of driver types, can you match them up to players you think fit the vibe?????

e.g. is there a former champion (lewis/fernando coded) who's looking for a comeback? is there a young talent who's had bad luck but is on the rise (lando) is there a calm, level headed one that everyone thinks will go far (oscar) is there a charming elegant one that social media is obsessed with (charles my babygirl). im assuming djokovic is the max verstappen adjacent, fairly young dude who's smoking everyone, yeah?

just like ugh I LOVE f1 so dearly and i think sporting parallels will help SO much

question: is it a big money sport like f1? Obviously anyone can pick up a racket and hit a ball, but is it very expensive and exclusive to make it into the big leagues? you mentioned smth in the fic about oscar adding up the whole cost of going pro, would that be a huge problem for poorer families?

are there any player pairings with vaguely homosexual vibes? again with the damn f1 parallels but adjacent to max/charles, carlos/lando, even lewis/nico if I dare mention brocedes, because I just absolutely live for speculation of silly little goofy athletes' relationships with each other

here's where I get REAL shallow but fuckin sue me, WHICH ARE THE PRETTY ONES I CAN SIMP OVER. i am bi so that doubles the market, but basically which are the ones that i can watch edits of and get all giggly and blush over, in your opinion and in the general tennis community's opinion.

whats andy murray's deal? Is he retired? Is he like the sebastian vettel of tennis?

how dramatic is it compared to f1? we all know that f1 is gossip girl on wheels... is tennis gossip girl running around a court or is it less drama-fueled?

not a question but I'm so excited to see which f1 drivers turn up to Wimbledon this year like, CROSSOVER EPISODE YEAAAA

is djokovic the max-esque guy where it's like "okay I don't mind you, you're cool, but god DAMNIT, stop being so good, let my other favourite little meow meows have a CHANCE for once"

how worldwide is it? are players mostly European/Aussie like f1 or is it more widespread?

is the meme game good? i LIVE for online hilarity in sports, are there any iconic tennis moments/memes a la "it's near a fish" "smoooth operator" "bwoah" etc etc whatever

really gotta stop talking about f1 in terms of tennis but it's the only other sport I'm really into IM SORRY FORGIVE ME

which are the "sad wet cat" (dearly beloved) players? you mentioned one guy but there's gotta be more than one right??? I always get attached to athletes with those vibes

IM SO SORRY ABOUT THE CONSTANT QUESTIONING BUT YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I TRUST TO GIVE ME CORRECT INFO RN BECAUSE YOU REALLY SEEM LIKE YOU KNOW YOUR SHIT

finally a HUGE FUCKING THANK YOU???? For putting up with my idiot ass mostly, and your fic is singlehandedly making me wander into the tennis world despite knowing literally nothing and you're helping my understanding SO much, youre about to drag me down this sport's rabbit hole just by existing. tennisblr seems like such a fun adorable place im SO excited to start watching stuff, you're a legend and ilysm <3333

you are literally NEvEr irritating you are the best thing to happen to my inbox every time, sorry i was so slow on this one!! I had a very hard time relating f1 drivers to tennis players lmaoooo so in the end i just skipped that part!! I'm so sorry!!! it's just so hard because the narrative of f1 drivers is so specific and intrinsically tied to TEAM and to their teammates, and to the tragedy of a good car and/or the wonder of a great car ... the betrayal of contract negotiation & silly season etc.... tennis just doesn't really have that!! all the narratives are more player v. self and player v. world, instead of driver v. driver and driver v. fate. if that makes sense??

so yeah. sorry 😭😭 it's also possible that I just don't have enough imagination and somebody can jump in to help with that .... anyway, moving right along to

"is tennis a big money sport"

GOD yes. tennis is soooooo expensive, it takes approx 1 billion dollars to pay for lessons, court time, coaching, travel, accommodation, gear, etc etc. :// You get paid if you win. let me say that again: you get paid if you WIN. there aren't salaries! early in your career, you are HEMORRHAGING money, esp if you have a coach. the travel is fricken expensive all by itself!! and if you're paying a coach as well you're either in debt or you're playing with house money if you catch my drift. (tennis players often come from wealth, much like f1 drivers — they can also be sponsored, sometimes by their country, but usually only if & while they're successful!!)

if you do well, you start to win, maybe you make money, more likely you're breaking even for a while (or even still losing). if you do REALLY well, then you're looking at more prize money and maybe sponsors, so then you can start making some real money out of this. but yeah it's CRAaaaaaazy how much money tennis players pay to play tennis lol!! it is 10000% a problem for getting underprivileged kids into tennis, there's a reason tennis is so white!

"are there any player pairings w vaguely homosexual vibes"

LOLLLL look i never turn down a chance to push the sincaraz agenda but also, carlos alcaraz does that for me!!!!

they're so cute damn

also getting into sinner/berrettini …

but honestly, besides that?? f1 is way better for pairings because we watch them interact with each other off track WAYY more. you barely see tennis players interact with each other! i have been emailing the respective tennis associations about this (jk but I should). MORE GOOFY VIDEOS WITH PLAYERS DOING STUPID GAMES (with each other, crucially)

"which are the hot ones"

ooohh this is suuuper subjective but i am soOOOoo into coco gauff, she's gorg, also iga sviatek in red, also daria kasatkina, also maria sakkari really does it for me, also katie boulter is so cute.

hot damn

on the atp side oBVI jannik, carlitos is so cute but he looks so young i feel like he's less hot and more adorable, caspar ruud looks like ryan gosling as you have pointed out, ben shelton is gorgeous (and cocky in a way that unfortunately does compel me, oops), arthur fils!! beautiful. tennis players are all hot, in my mind??? they're so …. well rounded …. 😏😏😏

"which are the "sad wet cat" players"

andrey rublev my beloved sad cat

muchova (not really a sad wet cat but tragically always broken in some way)

daniil medvedev but if the cat was cunty

"whats andy murray's deal?"

oh my GOD murray!! my love my husband my father my holy ghost!! a tragedy a triumph …. a player in the era of the Big Three (Djokovic, Federer, Nadal) and therefore destined to be remembered as "oh, and andy murray" … or "one of the big four" (the big four is not a thing unless you're talking about andy murray lmao) ... a great player, one of the greatest, a slugger, a workhorse, had one of the cleanest backhands of all time, and the classiest guy in tennis … see: andy murray shutting down sexist reporters on multiple occasions ....

He's not retired !! he's still going, here he is recently losing:

He's actually (possibly) playing at this upcoming Challenger Tour event! as are a number of interesting players. the reason that this is interesting is that Challenger level tournaments are a level below the ATP Tour, so you don't often have this many recognizable (to me, anyway) names playing at this level!

[side note: the movie Challengers — the name is a play on the Challengers tour. they're playing a Challengers match in the movie, but also "challenging" each other for zendaya … you get it]

Anyway this tournament should be interesting … andy murray is getting older but he's not ready to quit!! he's gone on the record saying there are things he's still trying to accomplish before he retires, and he's playing well in practices it's just not translating to matches yet. he's also said if his body tells him to retire he will, but uhh. he's got a literal metal hip so clearly he's not QUITE ready to listen to his body.....

"is he the seb of tennis" HMMMM this is an interesting question, I wouldn't really class him this way — seb is like a silly little sexy fruity goblin (if I'm reading his vibe correctly — I'm late to f1) and andy is a stoic public school kid with a goofy streak … if that makes sense …

"how dramatic is tennis compared to f1?"

ALSO INTERESTING I think that's sort of relative to how much you care about individual players, I think game-play is pretty dramatic at times but nobody's ever in danger of bursting into flame??? so in that sense not as dramatic as vroom vroom sport lmaoo but there is a bit of temper tantrum throwing, and then important wins (see: Alcaraz Wimbledon 2023) are SO dramatic in the best way…

gossip-wise I don't think it's as dramatic as f1!! there's deffo tennis gossip but I think, again, because there aren't teams, the drama is less wrapped up in "betrayal" narratives yknow??? like ferrari ditching sainz for lewis was dramatic in so many different ways, not LEAST because of the betrayal of carlos. I feel like tennis is less set up for that, bc it's every player for themselves

"is djokovic the max-esque guy where it's like "okay I don't mind you, you're cool, but god DAMNIT, stop being so good, let my other favourite little meow meows have a CHANCE for once"

YES EXACTLY i cut in your whole q because that's exactly right!! so so so apt imo .. howEVERRR it was less correct when federer and nadal were still around and at their best, because those three really did make up the Big Three, capital B capital T, and they had such a good dynamic going between the trio — it was less one-note when djokovic had a constant fight on his hands... now djokovic is older and slowing down so we're getting into a sunset period, which is interesting because he's still doing GREATTT (and I wish he would stop, give my meow meows a chance etc) but everyone sees the light at the end of the tunnel re: a djokovic retirement. whereas I think people are looking at the max ascendancy and saying "GULP" bc we all want our favorite boys to win at least one WDC (cough lando cough cough osc)

"how worldwide is it?"

fairrrrly? but yes europeans heavvvvily represented, americans as well to some extent, asia and australia to some extent — not so stark as f1, but def same bougie euro vibes lmao

"is the meme game good?"

again fairrrrrly but def not to the same extent!! less of a "here are the memes everyone knows" and more in the spirit of, like, if you're following a few players & the major tournaments, tennis tumblr/twitter is fun to be on … trying to think of a "classic" tennis meme and I can't which isn't a good sign lmaooo .. jannik puking in a bin and then going on the biggest win streak of his career is a pretty good meme in my mind though ...

CROSSOVER EP YAAHHHHHHHH I CANNOT WAIT WE BETTER GET SO MANY GOOD WIMBLEDON PHOTOS AJHFDLAKSJFHDKLASJFH

sorry again to be so slow !! this was fun to go through as soon as I stopped tearing my hair out trying to make player: driver comparisons but again, maybe I'm just not creative enough ..

xx ily :))))))