thecouchsofa

[thecouchsofa]

[thecouchsofa]

I love how both times Harry is eavesdropping on Draco in Chamber of Secrets with Draco completely unaware that Harry is listening (Borgin & Burkes and Polyjuice scenes), Draco is talking about something and then suddenly mentions Harry, entirely unprompted - the takeaways being that he’s been talking about Harry nonstop over the summer, to the point where Lucius has to beg him to cut it out, and that out of all the Muggle-borns in school, he singles out Colin just because he’s become a rival in his efforts to get Harry’s attention.

[thecouchsofa]

Hi! 18 and 23 for the ask game :)

18: Your body of work is being used against you in court. What crime(s) are you accused of?

Definitely aiding and abetting; Zach Smith is also going to sue my ass into next week for defamation

23: Badly describe the plot of your WIP(s).

The fic I'm currently writing is for an anon fest, but the HP fic that I'll probably write next (unless I sign up for yet more fests - derangement pending) is as follows: 💀

Mum dies. Dead mum make Harry sad. Mum write diary. Harry follow list in diary. Draco also there somehow.

very normal fic writer asks

[thecouchsofa]

Ask game: 16

16: Fuck, Marry, Kill your three longest fics.

My first reaction to this was 'nooooo' but then I looked at what the three longest fics currently on my profile are and my opinion changed to 'fuck, this is easy'

Fuck: Us, infinite (unfortunately) - this fic would show me a good time. I'd pick this fic up at a bar, take it home, and pay for its uber the next morning

Marry: Brightest Constellations - this fic cries during sex but I could be into that. Never want to have to worry that your partner is only pretending to love you? Want someone who just gets you? This fic is that bitch for you

Kill: Something in the Orange - just like I don't listen to slow tempo music when I'm sad, I don't seek to live my irl life in the throes of misunderstandings and unsaid words, even if it all works out in the end. I'll take the sex crier, thanks

very normal fic writer asks

[thecouchsofa]

Sleepover, oil on canvas

Jeffrey Heiman, 2025

[thecouchsofa]

very normal fic writer asks pt. 2

Describe your writing style as if it were a bottle of wine.

If your writing process was a spotify playlist, what would it be called?

As a writer, are you an evil dictator, a ship captain, a trauma dumper, a mad scientist, a carefree hedonist, or a vengeful rogue?

Which fic do you secretly root for to get the most hits/kudos, etc.?

Which fic do you fear has become too powerful and must be stopped?

Assign each of your fics (or a selection) a dnd alignment.

What is [insert fic's] sun, moon + rising?

Which of your fics would you sacrifice to the gods to get [insert thing] in return?

Which two fics do you ship, and what is their ship name?

Which two fics do you think would have the most beef with each other?

What would the lovechild of [insert fic] and [insert fic] be like?

Which fic would you trust to do your taxes?

Which fic would betray your friends and frame you for murder?

Which version of [insert character] would you most like to be lost in the woods with?

Which version of [insert character] would you least like to go on a roadtrip with?

Fuck, Marry, Kill your three longest fics.

Delete, Orphan, Rewrite your three shortest fics.

Your body of work is being used against you in court. What crime(s) are you accused of?

Assign each of your fics (or a selection) a liquid.

Style [insert fic] in a cute little outfit.

Cast your mutuals in [insert fic].

Select a mutual to ensare within the narrative of one of your WIPs.

Badly describe the plot of your WIP(s).

Spoil the ending of your WIP (wrong answers only).

There's a contentious debate amongst the scholars analysing your work—what is it?

[thecouchsofa]

many on here need to be learning this lesson

[thecouchsofa]

Do you think Laurent looks like Auguste with long hair? Like his face I know body type wise you draw them differently but I'm curious about how you see their faces

Hi, Anon!

Yes!! Regardless of how long his hair is, I think the older Laurent grows, the more he looks like Auguste face wise 🙂‍↕️ (strong mole genes bros)

[thecouchsofa]

i think dumbledore was growing weed in the forbidden forest the whole time and that’s why it was forbidden. that’s also why he acts the way he does.

[thecouchsofa]

congrats on your elopment! this makes sense, because in many ways you’ve invented romance w your fics

Thank you 🩵🩷💛 It's cliche but I'm truly so thankful for my partner, he couldn't be more right for me!

This gave me a proper chuckle - PSA that I'd like to be credited in all romance fics going forward, since I invented the concept 🤣

[thecouchsofa]

I JUST FINISHED THE BRIGHTEST CONSTELLATION OF OUT SOULS AND I JUST CAME HERE TO TELL YOU THAT THANK YOU😭😭 rn im in a terrible depression and i decided i want to read harry having a terrible depression too, and omg😭😭 that fic just changed my life, i cried i lot and i giggled and kicked my feet a lot

thank you for writing that amazing fic that now is my fav fic ever, i cant stop listening to wonderwall without thinking about draco and harry in that last scene at the pub 🫶🏻🫶🏻😭

Hugging you and patting your head ❤️💜💙 I'm so glad that you found something in that story that you needed, that's the biggest compliment to receive!

[thecouchsofa]

Bought both my wedding ring and my elopement dress today! Shit's getting real

[thecouchsofa]

I have no one else to send this to, but can I just ask if you’ve seen blonde Nicholas Hoult in his press tour for his new film? This is Draco Malfoy, ladies and gentlemen!

I hadn't before but I have now and OH MY GOD YES

You're so correct

[thecouchsofa]

I guess you all remember the end of the first book...

Damen: I meant, can't you put aside whatever family quarrel you have and speak honestly to your uncle?

(And to prevent missunderstandings here: I don't say or imply Damen doesn't know anything. This just reminded me on what Laurent must have thought at that moment, alongside of hundreds of other things...)

[thecouchsofa]

📚June Stats 2025 (Month in Review)🌻

Total words written: 21,959 words

No. of days written on: 9/30 days

No. of days used for editing: 5/30 days

Most productive week: June 22-30, with 7,754 words written

Most productive day: Sunday the 22nd - 7,754 words written

Fics worked on: 5, including:

Divinity Says (Damen/Laurent, 73k, E) - edits only

Wireless 2025 (Drarry, anon)

The Good Side, aka Teddy Fest 2025 (Teddy/James Sirius, 8k, E)

Much Ado About Draco (Drarry, 30k) - edits only

Hurt/Comfort 2025 (Drarry, anon)

Favourite fic written this month: Wireless

Fics posted this month: 2:

Divinity Says - Chapters 11-12 (Damen/Laurent, 73k, E, now complete)

The Good Side (Teddy/James Sirius, 8k, E)

Thoughts: Hello and goodbye to my worst writing month of 2025! I've got the busiest fortnight of work this year to thank for that travesty. As of typing this, I haven't written a single thing since the 22nd but thankfully I've also got next week off 🍻 Goals for July are to finish editing MAAD, finish writing the bulk of my Hurt/Comfort fic in the next fortnight so that it can be beta'd (why tf does everything always have to be beta'd, let me live), and possibly start chipping away at my next longer Capri idea if I can muster the will to live 🫠

July goal: 40,000 words

⭐ Total word count for 2025 so far : 294,795 words ⭐

[thecouchsofa]

We’ve reached the finale of All Things Teddy Fest! We encourage you to revisit the works you liked and take a moment to leave kudos, comment on, and share them—your support brightens the day for our creators, who make this festival possible. A big thank you to everyone who participated, from our talented creators to all of you who engaged by reading, liking, commenting, and sharing. Thank you for making this event a success!

All Things Teddy Fest 2025 - masterlist

📖FIC

One night to speed up truth by @andithiel (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, T, 13k)

Tedster, Dear by @motherofmercury (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, T, 3k)

it was you by @wolfpadx (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, E, 35k)

The Good Side by @thecouchsofa (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, E, 9k)

Canis by @chiquita-3 (Teddy Lupin/Harry Potter, E, 9k)

sped through all the red lights by @bewarethesmirk (Teddy Lupin/Draco Malfoy, E, 3k)

Let's wing it by TristanC (Regulus Black/Teddy Lupin, G, 7k)

Teddy the Tease by @maraudersaffair (Teddy Lupin/Bill Weasley, E, 2k)

A Wolf Devouring A Wolf Devouring A Wolf by @mourningliliesmorningglories (Sirius Black/Teddy Lupin/Harry Potter, E, 6k)

The Understudies by @smugrobotics (Teddy Lupin/Albus Severus Potter/James Sirius Potter, E, 4k)

Intoxicated with the Madness by the_prettiest_w0lf_star (Sirius Black/Teddy Lupin/Harry Potter, E, 8k)

Life Lessons on Love and Music by @siobhanhazel (Sirius Black & Teddy Lupin, T, 1k)

Don't You Worry About A Thing by @marlenemckinn (Remus Lupin & Teddy Lupin, G, 3k)

faces of family by @blackseatwenty (Teddy Lupin & Narcissa Black Malfoy, G, 4k)

🎨ART

ART: Breaking Your Curse by @steveahoi (Teddy Lupin/Bill Weasley, M)

[Comic] Flavour of the Day by @siobhanhazel (Teddy Lupin & Harry Potter, G)

Moonlight and Mischief by @eleonorapoe (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, G)

[ART] Hope by @digthewriter (Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, G)

[thecouchsofa]

Slander | @drarrymicrofic | 190 words