theochelpsquad
theochelpsquad
OC Help, Tips, and Development!
82 posts
This blog is here to help you create or improve your OC! We also do OC reviews, and we accept submissions of your OCs. We currently have two mods: Harmonia and Eris.
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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Lottie Chau (Fullmetal Alchemist OC)
https://aminoapps.com/c/fullmetal-alchemist/page/item/lottie-chau/pDBl_E7UpInManwLdbgDQd4X2BWwYjQNdM
Heya pals, Mod Harmonia here!!! Sorry about the inactivity but we got a new OC! woot woot
Yo. Just read the stats!
Name: Lottie Chau
Age: 19
Alchemy: Light Fracture
H: This threw me for a loop at first… light fracture sounds so cool and yet so confusing!! I’ll talk more about it below.
Height: 5'6
Hair color: Dirty/Light Orangish with a. Random pale streak in the front bangs area.
H: Okay, this is actually pretty cool! I looked up the pale streak thing and apparently it does happen in real life! It’s called poliosis and is caused by an absence of melanin in your roots. It can be a hereditary thing, or… drumroll, please… it can also be caused by an excessive dose of radiation! Maybe the Gate of Truth caused her blonde streak?
Eye color: Teal Cyan Mix
Rank: State Alchemist
Title: The Luminous Alchemist
Country of Birth: Xing
Country of Residents: Amsteris
Race: Half Xingese and half Amerstrian
Enrolled in the miniskirt army for a solid 4 years. ( cuz she can )
Description - Lottie is a Light Fracture Alchemist. (Takes the gas components of the atmosphere and combines with the heat from the sun she compacts it to shards of ‘light’ and uses them as weapons) She is from the land of Xing but uses alchemy instead of the dragon pulse. Yada Yada she is hotheaded and such but is very good at long range attacks. Think Maes Hughs with his throwing knives. Also due to opening the gate of truth while attempting to bring her little brother back to life she lost her sense of touch in both her arms.
H: I’ve just spent, like, 30 minutes researching light compression, and I’m actually very intrigued! None of the sources I’ve found can really agree, but sources from MIT and Harvard both claim that solid light is possible.
In this article, scientist Jared Cole says that, theoretically, by changing the state of photons, they could create “crystals” of light molecules (I’m totally not freaking out about how cool this is!!!!!). The only roadblock? There isn’t technology advanced enough to prove their results. But considering your OC is in the world of Fullmetal Alchemist, this doesn’t matter!
Another source talks about the physical effect of compressed light on people, and, considering your alchemist is actively bending the substance, I thought it might be important. Again, because it’s all hypothetical, no one can really agree, but most everyone mentions that the crystal-solid-light-thing would be freezing to the touch, something like dry ice. However, seeing as Lottie lost touch in her arms, she might not notice for a while, but the subsequent effects of near-frostbite every time she uses her alchemy might cause some problems–but it would make for a great story!
How her little brother died:
He was killed while attempting to enter the royal palace. The guards killed him and returned the body only for Lottie to preform human transmutation.
H: Why did he want to enter the palace?
( interesting plot for if she meets Ling )
H: Whew… that would be awkward.
Also just a small fun fact.
She is (SOMETIMES) from everyone’s Favorite Frozen Fort…BRIGGS!
H: SPEAKING OF FROSTBITE! If you decide to keep her light alchemy–which I recommend–she could go to Briggs to find a solution for her alchemy issues!
SUMMARY:
Honestly? This is one of the best FMA characters I’ve seen so far. While her backstory might need a bit more fleshing out, her powers are creative and believable, which is incredibly rare for an OC! Great job!
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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I need to take a moment to rave about my absolute favourite tool for writing right now! WorldAnvil.com! Its a brand new project that is already amazing. and free to use. You can make maps and drop location pins. Create timelines. Write articles using helpful templates. Engage with a really cool worldbuilding community on their discord server. Follow other worlds. And much more … .  It’s being made by a two person team and already its extraordinary. If you write, RPG or just like to worldbuild, please give WorldAnvil.com a try!
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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hi I was wondering how do you find "theme songs" for your characters and story in general?
Oof, I’ve never been good at finding theme songs myself :( usually I start with a song and then create a backstory! Nevertheless, here are some tips I managed to dig up from the internet:
1. If you’re making a fantasy setting, Two Steps From Hell makes some amazing fantasy-themed music (like it’s absolutely gorgeous I cannot recommend it enough)! They work great for Dungeons and Dragons characters especially. Unfortunately, very few of the songs have lyrics, so that might be a bit of a downside if you want a song choice that specifically captures your character.
2. Someone made a Character Theme Song Ideas playlist on YouTube, so listening to it is always an option!
3. Here, here, here, and here are a few quizzes to help you decide your own personal theme song! You can answer these from an OCs perspective to get a match.
4. A great place to start is with these Pinterest song lyric boards! Scroll through them to find a quote you find relatable to your story or character and trace it back to the source song!
-Mod Harmonia
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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Color Synonyms
White
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also: pale; blanched; sallow; pallid; waxen; spectral; translucent; albino; 
Grey
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also: dust; stone; pepper;  
Black
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also:  coal; slate; dusky; ebon; shadow; murky; 
Tan
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also: flesh; khaki; cream; tawny; 
Brown
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also:  henna; russet; sepia; chestnut; cocoa; drab; bronze; 
Red
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also: terracotta ; rouge; carmine;  fire-engine; ruddy
Orange
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also:  pumpkin ; rust ; 
Yellow
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also: sunny; amber; saffron; hay; straw; platinum; 
Green
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also: viridescent; grass; jade; forest; 
Blue
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also: turquoise; cyan; ultramarine; royal; aqua; aquamarine;
Purple
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also: berry;  amaranthine;
Pink
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also: flushed; candy; cherry blossom; petal pink ; 
—– source: http://ingridsundberg.com/
—–additional synonyms added by me
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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need refs/inspo for period clothing?
here you go:
Medieval (9th-15th century):
10th century and earlier
Romance (1000-1250)
11th century
12th century
13th century
more 13th century
14th century
more 14th
15th century
and more 15th century
Gothic (1150-1550)
Renaissance (1520-1650)
16th & 17th century
16th century
more 16th
Tudors (1500-1550)
more Tudors
Elizabethan Period (1558-1603)
Jacobean Era (1603-1625)
17th century
more 17th century
and again
and even more
this won’t stop
Baroque (1600-1750)
Georgian Period (1714-1830):
18th century
more 18th century
18th century women’s fashion
18th century men’s fashion
Rococo (1720-1770)
Classicism (1770-1790)
children 18th-19th century
Regency Preiod (1811-1820)/ Empire (1800-1820s):
1790-1820s
more stuff on regency and georgian era
even more
that’s not enough regency
and more
how is there so much
early 19th century men’s wear
early 19th century women’s wear
Victorian Period (1837-1901):
Romantic Era (1820-1840s)
Civil War Era/1850-1860s
1870-1890s
more victorian
Edwardian Period (1901-1910):
1900-1910s
Belle Epoque (1880-1910s)
more edwardian/belle époque
Modern:
1910s-1920s [Fashion between the World Wars]
1920s
more roaring 20s
so much 20s
1920s hairstyles
1930s
1930-1940s
1930-1950s
1950s
more 50s
1960s
1960-1970s
1980s
lots of periods in one spot/fashion through centuries:
here, here, and here is almost everything (and properly ordered)
also here with lots of historic fashion magazines
100 years of beauty (includes lots of other cultures too!)
historic fashion
costumes of antiquity
more historical clothing
history of fashion
more history of fashion
“vintage” clothing
historic costumes
children’s historical fashion/toys
details
historic wedding dresses
historic assecoires (hats, shoes…)
hats
masks
parasols
lots of embroidery/jewlery
it indeed is western/european centric, I’m sorry for that, but for other cultures I simply don’t have so many references
ALSO note that most of the pictures show historical clothing from the upper classes or more festive clothing of the lower/working class because normal working clothes wouldn’t survive for such a long time, and the clothes were often re-used over and over again!
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theochelpsquad · 7 years ago
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Lina Schlitz (Shingeki no Kyojin OC)
HEYAAAAAAAA its me again i made a really big mess of the old char sheet because i did it at like 3am so i decided i would redo it !! thanks again <333 
H: it’s fine! For the second time (bc Mod Eris is lazy!!!!) I’ll be the only reviewer. Under the cut, because this one is long!
Name: Lina Schlitz - リナシュリッツ
H: Shlitz is actually a name that has mid-German origins--nothing to fix here, it’s right on the SnK map!
Nicknames: Querida - pet in portuguese, given by her grandma. Idiot - given by some of her squad members. (i dont really have any other ideas for nicknames plz alp)
H: Most nicknames I’ve had or given come from inside jokes or shared experiences--a joke about her age when she started training or an alias from a battle, maybe?
Age: 17
Gender: Female
Birthday: 18/11/833 - scorpio (so she would be in the …. 102nd squad i think ? as she would be 17 by the time eren, mikasa, armin & the squad were 15… .although i kinda wanna make her older . .. should i?)
H: I honestly like making my characters older--older characters have more extensive backstories and more room for creativity. However, it’s your choice in the end! (And I’m pretty sure if she was 17 while the trio were 15, she’d be in the 102nd.)
Faceclaim: michiko malandro (from michiko and hatchin)
(i think this one is the most accurate - hairstyle , face, everything, n expression)
(without the chains tho… and the survey corps uniform… and shorter hair)
H: She’s so pretty cri
-personality:
positives;
brave - lina is not afraid to put herself in danger or do risky things, so she can get things done better than most people
decisive - she can throw her humanity out of the window to make decisions
honest - she doesn’t really care what people think of her, so she will often say what she thinks to your face
direct - as above, lina gets straight to the point 
observant - she often notices the little details, from environment to facial expressions or body language
realistic - she knows that she might die any day, and she lives life to the fullest
simple - relating to her trait of being realistic, lina views life in a simple way - you either die or you don’t, and if you don’t, then you better make the most of it
kind - despite not showing it much, lina is actually quite kind due to her grandparents and parents raising her to be a good lil child
neutrals;
competitive - she loves a good competition and will never back down from a challenge
sarcastic - lina uses sarcasm to make people laugh and hide her true feelings
unsentimental - as mentioned in her trait description of decisive, she knows that her 
comrades, family, and friends can die any day and they have a high chance of it too, so lina detaches herself from them as much as possible
tough - lina can power through a lot of situations, as she contains her emotions on the inside
calculating - she can observe a situation and make a decision off of it, but also she is good at making plans
strong-willed - lina will not give up. ever. no way hozay
perfectionist - everything must be perfect - including her statistics, battle technique, horse, and mostly everything under the sun. however most things aren’t perfect which annoys her to no end
negative;
cocky - lina can often overestimate herself, in battle and in casual situations, which leads to her putting herself and her comrades in danger
brittle - her emotions are easily hurt, although she doesn’t show it
manipulative - lina will lead people on if it benefits her
compulsive - she often acts off of instincts and emotions alone, tying in with being cocky
disrespectful - adding in to lina’s trait of being honest, she often disrespects her superiors, elders, and anyone on the planet if she feels like it - which doesn’t make her that likeable 
hostile - being hostile to keep people at a distance means that lina doesn’t have many friends
inconsiderate - as long as it is good enough for lina, it is good enough for you so you better not complain got it got it ok
messy - lina’s bed is often unmade and her appearance is disheveled
mannerless - tying in with being disrespectful, she often licks her plates, chews with her mouth open, talks while speaking, disrespects her superiors, ect
neurotic - despite not showing it, lina often has anxiety attacks about her past and friends, and what will happen to her (her symptoms include nausea, fear of dying, a racing heart, and heightened senses - including trembling and sweating, also staring off into space)
possessive - lina is possessive of her possessions, her friends, herself, and mostly everything that she views belongs to her
procrastinator - she often pushes things like apologising, doing training, and eating, off until the last minute
sly - tying in with lina’s trait of being manipulative, she can worm her way into someones mind quite easily and manipulate them for her own gain
uncooperative - she is terrible at teamwork, believing that everyone is ‘cramping her style’ and slowing her down, so she often refuses to work in a team and has to be forced - unless she is the leader, and then she loves to boss everyone around
sadistic - lina enjoys cutting the limbs off of titans before she kills them, however only ones that remind her of the one that killed her grandma and family - the others she has a strange interest in
cold - she often pushes people away, rejects friendship offers, and isolates herself
stubborn - once lina has decided she is doing something, there is no changing her mind
hot-tempered - she often flies off of the handle when provoked or annoyed, or if she is in a bad mood
H: So, from skimming, I’m summarizing her personality as appearing outwardly cold (though she doesn’t always mean to be) but actually being a lot different and less intense when you get to know her.
-appearance:
Hair Colour: brown-black
Hair Length/Style: mid-back length, extremely straight - tied in a high ponytail (so it is around the length of kristas/sashas)
Eye Colour: nut brown (very dark brown) with bits of lighter brown
Skin Colour: bronze-coloured
H; Seeing as the SnKverse is mostly white and light-skinned, how does her race affect her life? I’m guessing that once the Titans arrive, people don’t care what the heck you look like if you’re the one saving their asses, but maybe when she was a child?
Body build: mesomorph, a mix of hourglass and inverted triangle - lean
H: As she continues her training, she’ll begin losing weight and her hourglass figure will be less dramatic. If you want to write/draw her according to the timeline of her training, that’s a good thing to keep in mind!
Demeanor: relaxed - arms crossed, leaning on walls, slouched in chairs, head tilted back, head resting on table
Ethnicity: Brazilian/Portuguese/German/English (where is the story set in ??? nobody knows)
H: I’m not certain myself, but I made a post on where the story most likely takes place. Brazil isn’t on the map, though. You could make her Brazilian ancestry from her grandparents or great-grandparents who immigrated north. Then again, the map isn’t canon, so who cares?
Height: 5'3
Weight: 8 stone 6
H: She’s slightly underweight, but enough that’s it’s realistic for a malnourished environment.
Scars: One down her right arm, due to when a titan had her in its mouth during an expedition and, although one of her teammates killed it, it’s jaw fell onto her arm when it hit the ground and broke her arm.
-statistics:
Combat: 9/10
Hand to Hand Combat: 7/10
Agility: 4/10
Initiative: 8/10
Wits: 5/10
Teamwork: 4/10
3D Maneuvering Gear: 6/10
Offense: 9/10
Defense: 4/10
Cockiness: 10/10
Titan Kills: 
Solo: 11
In team: 21 (is this ok ?? i assumed since she was 2 years older, p good at fighting, and in the scouting legion, that she would have a higher kill count than say, mikasa, even though she’s an ackerman, because mikasa is 2 years younger and hasn’t been on that many expeditions)
H: Sure! The 102nd would most likely have a pretty high kill count,seeing as a lot of battles happen after their training.
Grad Rank: 1st (ahh is this ok too? i thought since she was in the 102nd squad, and her family was in the military, that she could be 1st since there aren’t any y'know titan shifters or ackermans in her squad)
H: Also fine! The 104th was a special case--standards likely wouldn’t be as high in other training corps.
Grade: A
background:
lina’s ancestors moved with most of the world to germany inside the walls, the only safe place on the eartha lot of her family died on the way, only two survived along with a few other people - a wife and her husband, alanza and lucas santos - not much older than 18.
when they made it to the walls, they were given a small, one bedroom house inside wall maria, shinganshina district as they were one of the last people to arrive.
after a few years, they had a child together, and his name was to be victor. they taught their native language, portuguese told him to teach it to his future children to keep their country alive.
lucas decided to enroll in the military and joined the garrison to try and keep his family safe, but he was tragically killed when an abnormal titan flung themselves on top of the wall and ran along it, crushing the garrison underfoot.
it was eventually killed, with the help of one of the first elite teams and the scouting legion. lucas was one of the soldiers tragically killed in the attack and alanza was left to raise victor by herself.
when victor was a teenager, he too joined the military - scouting legion - despite his mothers wishes. he managed to survive, however, long enough for him to be promoted to team leader - and for his arm to be bitten off in a mission, not long after his promotion. he was discharged by the military and met a girl by the name of hanna.
it was love at first sight, and they married only a few months after they met - after all, they could die at any time. alanza was soon a grandmother to a child of the name sofia.
by this time, the schlitz/santos line had become quite legendary in the walls, due to their skill and unwavering determination to help mankind. this cycle of the generations was continued until it got to maria and dedrick - lina’s grandparents. their father, abe, had been brutally eaten alive by a titan. due to this they were both firmly against any of their children or grandchildren joining the military in fear of their safety, and so the cycle ended. that is, until lina was born from delmira and adelchi - maria and dedrick’s daughter and step-son.
as soon as abe saw her face he knew she would join the military despite anyones wishes. as lina grew up, abe’s prediction slowly came true - she idolized the military due to their unwavering bravery and optimism that humanity would win the war between them and titans.
she was often caught sneaking out of her house to watch the scouting legion coming home from missions, cheering them on despite the crowds nervous and dejected muttering. so it was no surprise when, on her 12th birthday, the first thing she asked for was to join the military. (that lil shmishirt)
she persisted until her grandparents were brought to her house the next day from their home in wall rose. they told her of all the dangers, and yet she still persisted. they finally agreed - but only because lina’s father said he would join with her.
as soon as the words came out of his mouth, a loud bang rang out that shook the floor and caused panicked screaming to be erupted from outside. lina’s family rushed through their front door, only for them to be met with a crowd of people sprinting past, yelling and screaming.
they pushed through the crowd and found themselves at the back of another crowd, all staring up at the wall. a giant titan, over 50 metres tall, was standing behind it - looking down at the people of shiganshina with a blank expression, its hand clutching the wall. steam came off of it, increasing the temperature of lina despite how far away it was.
her family was frozen, huddling together and clutching each others hands. maria - lina’s grandmother - was clutching the cross and figures of wall maria, rose, and sina attached to her necklace and praying.
the titan moved its foot back and kicked the gate, sending it splintering all over the town. titans waiting behind it were catapulted forwards, crushing citizens and soldiers along with the multiple boulders.
lina’s family turned and ran as fast as they could. despite being old, lina’s grandparents were fit and kept up with her family - delmira dragging lina by her hand.
they made it to the docks in wall maria just as the last boat was leaving. delmira, with lina in tow, immediately began to shove her way to the front to plead with the soldiers to let lina on board. they denied her request and delmira whispered something to lina. they hugged each other as long as possible before delmira broke away and disappeared into the crowd.
luckily, the guards were distracted by the giant horde of people trying to break through. lina ran up the docks, as far away from the crowd as possible, and found herself level with a boat - it looked full to the brim. lina looked to the next one and eyed it apprehensively. stepping back a few paces, she sprinted as fast as possible towards the ledge. pushing herself off of it. her hands reached out to the edge of the boat, but the side of the boat was slippery and her hands couldn’t get a grip in time.
lina scrabbled for a grip, her fingers of her left hand slowly slipping off as she began to fall, but before she could, her wrist was snatched up by a calloused hand.
she looked up to see a friend of her mothers, adelmo weber, holding onto her arm. he pulled her up and onto the boat, despite the outrage that burst from the lips of the citizens that there wasn’t any space left on the boat, and even though she was just a child, he should have not saved her.
lina looked back just in time to see the crowd of people frantically running away - towards wall rose - from a titan, nearly 10 metres tall, picking them up and eating them like insects. the manic crowd drew level with lina’s boat, and she made eye contact with her grandma - at the back, out of breath - as she was snatched up by the titan.
lina screamed loudly, screaming at her grandmother to fight, fight the titan and get to wall rose - but it was futile.
the titan bit maria in half and let her severed legs fall to the ground as lina finally reached the edge of the boat, stretching out her hand to her grandmothers half-eaten corpse and the rest of her family.
the crowd was surrounded by titans coming from both sides and they were all massacred.
lina slumped down to the floor of the boat, and cried until she could cry no more. she slept until they reached wall rose.
H; Holy crap, all of this when she was 12? Poor kid! She probably has a lot of left-over trauma and stress from that day: PTSD, anxiety, possibly some extreme paranoia and OCD-like tendencies to check over and over that everything is okay.
the arrival of the boats was not received well by the residents of wall rose. they immediately began to riot about food shortages, overpopulation and that the titans would be drawn to the bigger population of wall rose.
lina exited across the drawbridge with the swarm of people who was on her boat, and they were promptly greeted by being pushed back by the citizens of wall rose.
they said that the other boats were too full, and they would not have enough room for all of the people on lina’s boat. the people onboard rioted immediately, calling out where would they go, would you be so heartless as to send us back - until they were silenced by the garrison and military police separating the brawling crowds.
they told all the refugees to go to the town square, where the people of appropriate build and age would be enlisted to the military with no choice, while the rest would go to work in the fields.
lina was enlisted despite being only just 12, and so began the start of her journey.
H: Woah, that’s young, even for SnK! Was she the only recruit of her age? Was she the focus of unwanted attention because of it? I have a student one year younger than the rest of the class at school and he’s always being picked on by the teacher (who I hate but that’s another story).
-trivia:
knows portuguese and when she is angry she slips in and out of it (for example, you are todas as dicas i hate eu estou para te you) also when she is tired or distracted she does too (i quero sleep por how tempo até as lights) this is because although her first language is english/german, her family spoke mainly portuguese at their home
H: My parents’ first languages were French and Arabic, and they do this all the time too! Nothing really important, I just wanted to add that. :)
she has the loudest, most boisterous laugh ever - although nobody has ever properly heard it
lina snores so loud she often kept the rest of her dormies awake
biggest sweet tooth ever - even though she rarely gets to eat anything other than beef stew and rations
H: This might not have been intentional, but people who experience traumatic events as children usually end up keeping childlike qualities with them for a long amount of time. Having a sweet tooth or sleeping with toys is not unusual for someone who went through what she did.
she has a bit of a portuguese/brazilian accent, mixed with english/german
lina cuts her own hair
her name means the heroes river, or river of light
SUMMARY-
H: To be honest, this character’s pretty airtight! There’s not much you really need to change on this one. She’s believable but still interesting enough to be a main character. Overall, great job!!
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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How do you find a headcanon voice for your oc in general?
Usually, I look up voice actors that come from a similar background as my OCs or have voiced a character that reminds me of my OC!-Mod Harmonia
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Also, it’s great to balance it out! The more your character suffers, the more baggage they carry with them from the event.
Do you guys think that a tragic past is an automatic no-no, or can the author write the character so it's okay? (Ex. one of my side characters is a lost noble who was kidnapped with two of her five older brothers during a failed assassination attempt when she was five. She was hit with debris and was struck with amnesia, failing to remember anything about her life before she woke up. However, she does not whine about her past, and she can disregard others trying to find her family.)
In my opinion, Tragic Past isn’t anything bad to add to a character. Just keep it at a realistic level, and don’t overload it.
-Mod Eris
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Do you guys think that a tragic past is an automatic no-no, or can the author write the character so it's okay? (Ex. one of my side characters is a lost noble who was kidnapped with two of her five older brothers during a failed assassination attempt when she was five. She was hit with debris and was struck with amnesia, failing to remember anything about her life before she woke up. However, she does not whine about her past, and she can disregard others trying to find her family.)
In my opinion, Tragic Past isn’t anything bad to add to a character. Just keep it at a realistic level, and don’t overload it.
-Mod Eris
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Katherine Jenkins (Attack on Titan OC)
Quotes: “If you’re just standing there doing nothing to help, I swear, Rachel, I’m going to kick someone’s ass, and you know damn well who.”
“I do not care WHAT you were going to say, but I’ll take your piece of cake and make it hostage, for you do not do anything stupid.”
“Why do you care? Go do something useful and don’t think about my safety. Yours is more important.”
H: This is also a really long review, so under the cut! I’ll be the only mod reviewing this one.
General Characteristics-
Name: Katherine Apprill Jenkins
Nickname(s): Kate (mostly used by Rachel), Jenkins (most of the higher-ups), Susan Jenkins (Levi when needs her attention), Catty (when being teased)
H: The nicknames are really creative, but why does Levi call her Susan? Did she tell him who she was? How did it affect their relationship?
Affiliation: Survey Corps, Special Operations Squad
Former Affiliation: 104th Training Corps
H: WOOO, 104th! My favorite thing about the AoT series is that OCs can be in the 104th Corps. Unfortunately, that means she can’t be in the top 10. :(
Theme Song:
(childhood) www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH5WzkE8_Hk&list=PLD511BA65BC4B66AF&index=7
(to her (future) significant other) www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4svwoQad6k&list=PLD511BA65BC4B66AF&index=5
(actual) www.youtube.com/watch?v=5KHEv5HMsWc
Zodiac: Aquarius
-
Physical Characteristics-
Accessories: None
Knowledge: 9/10
Conceptualization Power: 5/10
Motivation: 9/10
Will to Act: 10/10
Agility: 5/10
3D Maneuvering Gear: 8/10
H: Low agility and high 3DMG stats sounds like an interesting combination! Does it cause some trouble?
Swordsmanship: 7/10
Hand-to-Hand Combat:: 3/10
Long Range Accuracy: 4/10
H: It’s really rare to see an AoT OC with low battle stats and agility. I like where you’re going with her!
Strategy: 9/10
H: Earlier, you gave her low conceptualization power but high strategy. How does her mind work? I’m not saying you should change the scores--in fact, it might be more interesting to explain how she comes up with battle plans when she can’t conceptualize.
Teamwork: 6/10
Offense: 7/10
Defense: 5/10
Social Skills: 4/10
Dress Style/Wardrobe: Survey Corps jacket, White long-sleeved shirt, white pants, dark brown sash around the waist, dark brown knee-high boots, green cloak
Eye Color: Green
Equipment: 3DMG complete with snap-off blades
Gender: Female
Hair Color: Redhead
Height: 5'7" (170 cm)
Most Valuable Possession: A gold bracelet with “Susan Jenkins” written on it, which Katherine has since birth
H: I really like this tidbit! Who was Susan and where did she get the bracelet?
Nationality: British with both American parents
H: I made a post about AoT OCs a while ago, where I talked about character nationality. In the series, America is never mentioned, and most characters come from Europe. I would personally recommend that you change her parents’ nationalities, but seeing as the location of the AoTverse hasn’t been confirmed, you don’t have to.
Scars: One on her left knee, and a few on her back and shoulders
H: To add complexity to her background, explain where she got these. Maybe a fight, or an injury as a child?
Weight: 127 lbs (58 kg)
H: She seems pretty thin, but it could be because of malnutrition. Then again, Wall Sina (Sina? Sheena?) is mostly rich. Did her parents use up all of their money to move inside Wall Sina and ended up poor? Were they rich but she lost weight after running away?
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Personal Characteristics-
Birth Date: August 23
Birth Place: Yarckel District, Wall Sina (or Sheena, whatever)
First Word(s): “Papa’s song”
H: This is really sweet!
Parents: Ronald and Emma Jenkins
Siblings: Katherine Apprill Jenkins (stillborn)
H: Having a stillborn sibling can be hard, especially when you share a name. Did this affect her relationship with her parents and herself?
Death Date: N/A
Age at Death: N/A
Death Place: N/A
Resting Place: N/A
Last Word(s): She has already thought about them and has them ready
H: It seems like a small addition, but this says a lot about her character. I like it!
Primary Objective: Rachel says is for avenge the death of all the victims of Shiganshina, but Katherine never said that it was all the truth. So everyone else just assume that it’s somehow related to her family or friends, and she doesn’t want to talk about why she’s there or what are her main goals
H: Does she have a reason for not telling or is she just awkward?
Secondary Objective(s): Keep Rachel safe and protect the humanity
Priorities: Herself, Rachel, her friends and her family
Motivation: Rachel and herself. If it were not for the hope of living a happy life with her best friend after destroying all the titans, she would have gone insane and would throw herself into the mouth of a titan at the first opportunity.
H: I can tell that Rachel is a really important person to her. Does she feel guilty when Rachel is injured, even when it’s not her fault?
Accomplishments:
Solo Titan Kills: 9
Team Titan Kills: 25
Greatest Achievement: Helping humanity take back Wall Maria and Shiganshina District
Failures: Letting Jean irritate enough to fight physically with him, became too afraid of telling her parents about entering the Survey Corps and running away because of it
Biggest Failure: Feeling overconfident on her first battle and almost being killed as consequence
Self-Confidence: Kate has trouble trusting herself. Sometimes she is overconfident and thinks that she can defeat anyone (and ends up being defeated), at other times she trusts herself in a healthy measure, and at other times she simply thinks she can not do anything useful. Rachel is always there to make her go back to the healthy measure of self-confidence
Traumas: Hearing her parents discussing about her dead twin for the first time when she was really young
Embarrassment: Being scolded by Levi because of her fight with Jean (being scolded by her own crush, I would be embarrassed too)
H: Yikes… so would I.
Worries: She worries too much about Rachel, Wallace and Oliver, even if they’re actually good on protecting themselves she just can not think the worst will not happen.
H: Do they get annoyed at her overprotectiveness or do they understand?
Earliest Memory: Hearing her father singing for her when she was three years old
Fondest Memory: When she showed Rachel all her grandfather’s paintings of the outside world
Worst Memory: Seeing her comrades dying right in front of her, she was trying to help fighting against the Female Titan and after had to race back to the walls
Favorite Dream: Rachel and her living a happy life, free of titans and walls, with her other best friends together, every comrade alive and well with them
Worst Nightmare: Everyone is dead. Katherine is shaking as she was when she was held by a titan in her first battle. Female Titan, Armored Titan, Colossal Titan, Beast Titan, all of them are just ahead of her eating her best friends and she can not do anything to stop it.
H: Her nightmare has to do with being powerless; you could tie in her fear of losing control with anxiety and her overprotective nature.
Desires: to be free from these walls, this king and these titans along with all the people she cares about
Wishes: That her mother and father could see how much she changed and got better. Of course, to her it is a silly wish, but is what she wanted
Secrets: Her crush on Levi Ackerman (she think it is, but is pretty obvious)
Confidantes: Rachel and William
Soft Spots: The “cute dog face that fell from the change truck” thing and being called Susan.
Quirks: Is annoyed by people prone to fidgeting with things, is fascinated with bees, always have to scream once in the day “BRIOCHE” and/or “SAUERKRAUT” on Oliver’s ears because he get so mad (and is funny)
Dominant Hand: Ambidextrous
Catchphrase: “I’m not going to listen your stupidity.”
H: RUDE.
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Mental Characteristics-
Attitude: Most of the time Katherine shows little to no emotions, but when she’s with her “squad” (three childhood friends, Rachel, Wallace and Oliver) she becomes more sociable. Short-tempered when it comes to idiotic things. No matter what, she will try to protect her close friends if they’re in danger but Kate gets embarrassed when she’s the one being saved. Kate is emotional and sensible inside, but acts stone cold when she thinks emotions will interfere (almost all the time). She’s gentle and polite normally, but get angry easily and then she become violent and rude to her anger’s target.
H: These are really well written and realistic characters, well done!
Bad Habits: Following people if is bored, talking alone, breaking the rules if she think she needs
Good Habits: Help her comrades on trainings, discuss all her strategies with the others
Known Languages: English, French and a little about German
H: Where did she learn these? Was it taught to her by her parents or did she teach herself?
Pet Peeves: Idiotic comments, people who are drumming their fingers in things
Phobias: Ankylophobia (Fear of immobility of a joint)
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Spiritual Characteristics-
Animal: Owl
Superstitions: Every Friday 13th is a dangerous day and bad events can happen to people
Vices: Crankiness, doubt, secrecy, melancholic, moodiness
H: These are really well-rounded flaws!
Virtues: Awareness, cooperativeness, hopefulness, independence, punctiliousness
Signature Move: She doesn’t have one
Specialty: Planning and helping with strategies
Strengths: Protecting her friends, trusting her comrades and her will to survive
Weaknesses: Overconfidence (or lack of confidence at times)
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Residential Characteristics-
Citizenship: Wall Sina (or Sheena, whatever again)
Hometown: Yarckel District
Sleep Patterns: Katherine usually sleeps 3 hours and take naps during daytime
Traditions: Scream “BRIOCHE” and/or “SAUERKRAUT” on Oliver’s ears once in the day, before a mission Katherine takes out her bracelet and think about the “other Katherine”, then put it back
H: Is Susan Jenkins another name for her twin?
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Interpersonal Connections-
Friends: Oliver (OC), Wallace (OC), Rachel (OC), Sasha, Connie, Armin, Eren, Mikasa, Hanji, Levi (…or she does think he is), William (my friend’s OC)
Immediate Family: Ronald Jenkins (Father), Emma Jenkins (Mother), Katherine Jenkins (Twin sister, stillborn)
Inspirations: Levi, Armin Arlet, Eren Yeager (Jaeger, whatever)
Rivals: Jean Kirschtein
First Love: Oliver Schmit
Love Interest(s): Levi Ackerman and William Knox
H: This is a good place to expand on her relationships! Do William and Levi know she likes  them, and do they care? Are they jealous of each other?
Significant Other: None - she’s single
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Highs and Lows-
Likes: Reading mystery/thriller books, opening up to who she trust wholeheartedly, calm and silent places, home
Dislikes: Being angry, fighting against humans, fake smiles and fake people, being alone, misunderstandings
Favorite Animal: Cat
Favorite Color: Green
Favorite Drink: Coffee
Favorite Excuse: Unless she was doing something she’s comfortable, she will tell the truth. If it’s a secret or uncomfortable thing, “I was occupied enough”
Favorite Food: Apple pie
Favorite Number: 57
Favorite Pastime: Reading
Favorite People: The trio (Oliver, Wallace and Rachel), her two love interests
Favorite Place: Her room, as she made him look quite like his room at home
Favorite Quote From Another Character: I don’t like the terms “good person” or “bad person” because it is impossible to be entirely good to everyone - Armin Arlert
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Social Characteristics-
Communication: Katherine speaks politely and carefully so people understand exactly what she means, except when she relies on the person enough to speak in a more informal and less cautious way. When she gets angry she simply talks everything she feels or thinks about the person, rudely and maliciously, to hurt that person
Criminal Record: She doesn’t have a criminal record
Discrimination: Even if she don’t want to, Kate look down at the Military Police and the ones that run away for fear, especially the last one, because even if she is scared she fights (and, secretly, she remembers when she runned away from home and feel regret of being like those people).
Dominance: Following is always the best for her. She listen to her higher-ups well, but if Katherine feels that they are wrong, Kate knows that she needs to lead the ones that feel the same way that her.
Emotional Stability: Depending the topic of conversation or situation, the little Jenkins can explode or suppress her emotions until she’s all alone. Alone the girl cry all she needs to cry or hit something until it is in pieces. Normally Kate express herself if she feels comfortable, mostly when surrounded by friends or people she can trust.
Expression: The Jenkins almost all the time wears a blank expression, but if she’s with her friends or alone, you can see how she really is and feels.
Humor: With her friends she joke sometimes, but she isn’t the funny type
Liveliness: Once you gain her trust and/or affection, Kate will slowly open up and relax around you
Mannerisms: She moves her legs a little when she’s been waiting for a long time, runs her hand through her hair when she’s about to say something difficult or uncomfortable to someone else, scratches the back of her neck when she’s nervous, blink more than usual when she hears something unexpected or gets confused
Patience: “Everything has a limit,” she would say if someone asked why she did not wait for 2 hours to receive a piece of apple pie
Reputation: For the others in Survey Corps, she’s the girl who got a scolding from Captain Levi after fighting with Jean or the girl who makes good strategies, for those in the Military Police she’s the girl who makes great strategies and does not show emotions, for those who are in the Garrison is who helped to take back Wall Maria, and for normal people she is the daughter of a wealthy couple who has a twin who was born dead and was named with the name that would be her sister
H: She’s really complex!
Sociability: She does not approach other people unless she really admire that person or think is necessary. Usually people approach her
H: In general, I think you wrote her really well and realistically. She has an interesting backstory, but there are a few inconsistencies, and a few places where you could add more. She’s a really promising start, though!
0 notes
theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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♦Famethyst Gemsona Blog♦
Need help designing your gemsona? Can’t seem to find the perfect color palettes? Stuck on finding the perfect fusion? Well, you’ve come to the right blog, Peri!
We do the following gemsona help services: ♦Gemsona Designs/Appearance ♦Gemsona/Weapon Fusions ♦Gemsona Role/Rankings ♦Gem Personalities/Placements ♦Gemstone Meanings ♦Gemstone/s Color Palettes ♦Gem Critiques ♦Other Gemsona Help ( backstories, corrupted forms etc.) We are also in need of blog mods, so if you are interested, just tell us on instant messaging!  Mod positions are closed for now…
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Happy Gemsona Making!
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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How to Plot a Complex Novel in One Day
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Now first, I have to say, that the plot you’re able to come up with in one day is not going to be without its flaws, but coming up with it all at once, the entire story unfolds right in front of you and makes you want to keep going with it. So, where to begin?
What is your premise and basic plot? Pick your plot. I recommend just pulling one from this list. No plots are “original” so making yours interesting and complicated will easily distract from that fact, that and interesting characters. Characters will be something for you to work on another day, because this is plotting day. You’ll want the main plot to be fairly straight forward, because a confusing main plot will doom you if you want subplots.
Decide who the characters will be. They don’t have to have names at this point. You don’t even need to know who they are other than why they have to be in the story. The more characters there are the more complicated the plot will be. If you intend to have more than one subplot, then you’ll want more characters. Multiple interconnected subplots will give the illusion that the story is very complicated and will give the reader a lot of different things to look at at all times. It also gives you the chance to develop many side characters. The plot I worked out yesterday had 13 characters, all were necessary. Decide their “roles” don’t bother with much else. This seems shallow, but this is plot. Plot is shallow.
Now, decide what drives each character. Why specifically are they in this story? You can make this up. You don’t even know these characters yet. Just so long as everyone has their own motivations, you’re in the clear.
What aren’t these characters giving away right off the bat? Give them a secret! It doesn’t have to be something that they are actively lying about or trying to hide, just find something that perhaps ties them into the plot or subplot. This is a moment to dig into subplot. This does not need to be at all connected to their drive to be present in the story.  Decide who is in love with who, what did this person do in the 70’s that’s coming back to bite them today, and what continues to haunt what-his-face to this very day. This is where you start to see the characters take shape. Don’t worry much about who they are or what they look like, just focus on what they’re doing to the story.
What is going to change these characters? Now this will take some thinking. Everyone wants at least a few of the characters to come out changed by the end of the story, so think, how will they be different as a result of the plot/subplot? It might not be plot that changes them, but if you have a lot of characters, a few changes that are worked into the bones of the plot might help you.
Now list out the major events of the novel with subplot in chronological order. This will be your timeline. Especially list the historical things that you want to exist in backstory. List everything you can think of. Think about where the story is going. At this point, you likely haven’t focused too much on the main plot, yeah, it’s there, but now really focus on the rising actions, how this main plot builds its conflict, then the climactic moment. Make sure you get all of that in there. This might take a few hours.
Decide where to start writing. This part will take a LOT of thinking. It’s hard! But now that you’ve got the timeline, pick an interesting point to begin at. Something with action. Something relevant. Preferably not at the beginning of your timeline - you want to have huge reveals later on where these important things that happened prior are exposed. This is the point where you think about what information should come out when. This will be a revision of your last list, except instead of being chronological, it exists to build tension.
Once you’ve gotten the second list done, you’ve got a plot. Does it need work? Probably. But with that said, at this point you probably have no idea who half your characters are. Save that for tomorrow, that too will be a lot of work.
Disclaimer for this post.
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Writing Body Language
How to Improve your writing
This is something that happens every day in your life. A shift of your eyebrow in skepticism, or the way your lip may twitch to a half smile cause you’re trying not to laugh. These behaviors are vital for writing in character, because not only do the allow you to visually see what is happening but it is also reaffirming whatever emotion your character is showing.
So why should you write it?
Much of human communication is non-verbal which means you need to also translate this non-verbal reaction in a post. It allows you to greatly enhance the emotions of another character and always another person to ‘visually’ see how they feel in a post. Most of all, this will add depth and volume to your post to make it feel more real. IT will make your character feel like a human instead of just another fictional person you look at from above.
Below you will find a list different type of emotions and what sort of body language can be exhibited to them.
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Three ways to accent an action.
When writing about emotions, there are different ways to verbally write them out. Each one is unique in their own way, allowing you to show more about the emotion.
Emphasize the Emotion. But doing this, you are expressing both the emotion and the body language. We’ll use a simple example. It’s short and simple yet you can sense he is happy. John felt so happy that he was humming a tune while walking down the hall.
Complicate the Emotion. Sometimes, even when you are feeling one emotion, deep down rooted underneath the facade of it all, there is actually an underlining emotion they feel. This is something you have to truly express otherwise no one will know. John felt so happy that he was humming a tune while walking down the hall. However, it was obvious by the way his nose crinkled that he was disgusted by the actions beforehand. Instead, John covered it up by appearing pleased today.
Contradict the Emotion. This is a little different than complicate. Contradicting means that you are claiming one thing when in fact its the other. In many ways, this has a variety of uses, from inner depth of the truth to what you see in person, or someone creating a wall. It could be considered a lie, but when is anything that easy? John felt so happy that he was humming a tune while walking down the hall. In truth, once he was in the classroom, his shoulders slumped and a pout crossed his lips when no one was around, showing just how displeased he was with the situation.
Remember that you do not always have to contradict or complicate anything. Sometimes all you need to do is emphasize and that will be just fine. You don’t always have to have an underlining complicated for an emotion to make it more enhanced.
Do be afraid to use the Thesaurus to also improve an emotion. Such things as “happy” is a nice emotional word, but think of how much more powerful it is when you heard some is “overjoyed” or “content.” She how these emotions matched up with a body language can give two different styles of happiness? Mix and match to find what works best for your character at the time.
More In Depth Information
What I’ve stated above is more of a simplistic overview. IF you truly want to improve yourself, go to this
LINK HERE
To see just how much body language can reveal about a person. You will find things such as how a person lies, how the eyes reaction, the positioning of a person in personal space, mouth, and head body language and so much more.
Use these resources to greatly increase the reactions of your character to another and create a more life-like world.
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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OK I DONT KNOW IF THE STEVEN UNIVERSE FANDOM KNOWS ABOUT THIS ALREADY BUT IF NOT I FEEL THE NEED TO MAKE THE EXISTENCE OF GEMDAT.ORG KNOWN TO EVERYONE MAKING SU OCS
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SO I JUST DISCOVERED THIS SITE A FEW MINUTES AGO AND HERE’S WHAT’S SO GOOD ABOUT IT
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OK? YEAH. YOU CAN SEARCH GEMSTONES BY COLOR AS WELL AS BY CUT, AND WHILE I THINK THE COLOR SEARCH IS PROBABLY MORE USEFUL, SEARCHING BY CUT IS PRETTY INTERESTING TOO
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AND OF COURSE, IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT KIND OF GEM YOU’RE LOOKING FOR, JUST REPEATEDLY REFRESH WHILE BORING YOUR EYES INTO THE “RANDOM GEMSTONE” CORNER
AND THEN, WHEN YOU GO TO A GEMSTONE’S PROFILE IT WILL GIVE YOU THESE
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COLOR VARIATIONS!!!!
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VARIATIONS OF THE GEMSTONE!!!
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PHOTOS OF UNCUT SAMPLES!!!
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AND OF COURSE A GIANT INDEX OF ALL THE GEMSTONES THEY HAVE INFO ON!!!!
THIS HAS BEEN A LOUD AND SOMEWHAT POORLY WRITTEN PSA!!!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME!!!
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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Indigo Terzi (Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood OC)
#OhGodIReallyHopeI'mNotAnnoyingAnyone
H: You’re not, don’t worry!
Hi, I’m Fable (pseudonym, obviously). Before I get into this, I want to apologize if you’re flooded with stuff and I’m annoying you, but if you could read Indie’s profile and offer criticism, it’d be really appreciated. (Art Credit to Rinmaru Games). Firstly, yes, this is a world cross OC. I’m sorry if you don’t like those. Also, Indie is paired with Ed. I’m also sorry if you don’t like that.
H: Hi! We didn’t get your art, for some reason. In my opinion, world-cross OCs and OC/Canon pairings aren’t an automatic fail, if they’re done in a way that makes sense. For example, add some backstory to how the world cross happened, or show your OC and the canon character eventually falling in love.
E:  Ok, let me tell you, it’s always okay to pair your characters with actual characters in the show, for the most part! But that depends on how close you want to stick to canon (considering the character may already have a love interest in canon). So it’s your decision.
H: Alright, under the cut, because this is a little long!
Name:  Indigo Arianna Terzi
Meaning:  Blue purple, prophet
Nickname(s): Indie, IAT
Alias:  N/A
Age:  14/15 (changes through story)
Race:  Greek
E: You might want to change Race to Nationality, and considering the fact that her name is Terzi, you should add that she’s (possibly) Italian.
Gender:  Female
Date of Birth:  
Birthstone:  
H: I’m not sure if this was accidentally not included for some reason, but if you’re looking for a birthday that has some sort of meaning, I’d recommend a date in January (which represents doorways in change, referencing her world cross).
Birth Place:  Chicago, IL, USA
Current Location:  Somewhere in Amestris probably
H: If you want to add a more specific location, I added a map of Amestris below.
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Goal(s):  Live…? Master her alchemy
H: What type of alchemy does she have? Does she need gloves like Roy or a transmutation circle to do it? Maybe try to link her form of alchemy to her life back at home or her childhood if you can.
Like(s):  Musical theatre/acting/singing/dancing, books, learning new things, comfy chair, hot chocolate, puns, playing with people’s hair, being alone with her thoughts, listening to other people talk/sing, bay windows, patterns and symmetry, logic, romance, history, studying how things work, pretty colors, pasta, dogs, children, hugs and human warmth, going shopping
Dislike(s):  Being bored, people mocking people for things they like, homophobes, unprovoked violence, needles/doctors, unfamiliar people, being without her phone and bag, conflicting patterns/colors, asymmetry, complicated math, silence, loneliness
Hobbies/Habits:  Hobbies: Writing, reading, singing, dancing, playing with hair, taking pictures, keeping a journal/Habits: Biting nails, twirling hair, licks lips
Flaws:  Sarcastic, comes off as cold/indifferent/annoying, has little self confidence, over thinks
E: I think that you might want to add a couple more flaws, some that will make her a bit more realistic. Maybe she’s a compulsive liar, maybe she often has tunnel vision with regards to others’ feelings and emotions, maybe she has a really short temper.
H: I really like how complicated and realistic these traits make her together!
Fears:  Needles/doctors, being abandoned
Personality:  Comes off as very cold and emotionless, guarded until she knows someone, awkward when flustered, passionate, can act childish, self depreciating, stressed, sarcastic, tries to be humorous and relate to people, intelligent, confused (not about anything in particular, just confused), aware of the world and it’s dangers, over thinks things, often daydreaming/lost in thought, true to herself
H: To me, she sounds like a character who prefers to be self-reliant. If you want to humanize her and her relationship with other characters, you can add some problems she faces trying to express her feelings to them freely.
Status:  Alive
Appearance
Skin Color:  Olive
Body Build:  Slight, petite
Eye Color:  Indigo (hence name)
H: How does she have indigo eyes? Did she live in an AU where purple, red, and other unusual eye colors were considered normal? Did she live in regular Chicago, but her eyes looked indigo in a certain light?
E: Indigo eyes are very rare. In fact, I think it may be one of the rarest eye colors in humans. But I’m sure she could have dark blue eyes!
H: Dark blue eyes could definitely work, and they do look indigo sometimes.
EDIT-
H: Then again, some characters from FMA have unrealistic hair and eye colors, like Rose Thomas, so it’s not a big deal.
Hair Color:  Dark brown
Hair Style: Down to ribs when down, but usually looks shorter because it’s in a high ponytail atop her head
Height:  5’
Weight:  88 lbs
H: Considering her age, she would normally be around 5′4″ and 105 pounds. If you want to keep your current measurements, you should consider adding a reason for them. Maybe Indigo has a sort of nutritional deficiency that stunts her growth? I know somebody who struggles with that, and they have to eat sugary things constantly to keep themselves healthy. That deficiency could make her story more interesting, as she now needs to concentrate on what she needs to eat, too, while also surviving in a different world.
Automail:  None
Other: Scar under right eye from falling down stairs as a kid
E: To be honest, I think that any falling injuries that would give her a cut under her eyes would also (in most cases) damage the bone in her face around her eyes.
H: If you want to keep the scar, burns, car crashes, and bike accidents are all common childhood injuries and could all cause a scar. However, falling down the stairs could also cut her without damaging her bone structure if she landed on something sharp, like a vase.
Clothing of Choice:  Black leggings, black combat boots, gray undershirt, dark green hooded jacket, brown messenger bag
Abilities
Occupation: None at the moment
Alchemic Element or Transmutation Specialty:  All
State Alchemist?  No
   State Alchemist Name:  N/A
Weapon of Choice:  Preferably no weapon, but fists if needed
Fighting Style:  Aikido
   [Scale 1-10, 1 = lowest, 10 = highest]
Alchemy Usage:  8/10 (eventually)
Swordsman and/or Gunmanship:  2/10
Martial Arts Skill:  9/10
Defense:  8/10
Offense:  4/10
Teamwork:  6/10
H: These statistics seem to really fit her character, down to her guarded nature being translated to high defense stats! I’d try not to change these if possible.
Relationships
Parents:  Helena Pallas-Terzi, Dion Terzi
Sibling(s):  N/A
Other Relative(s):  Petros Pallas (maternal grandfather), Elaine Galanis-Pallas (maternal grandmother), Markos Terzi (paternal grandfather), Tessa Elias-Terzi (paternal grandmother)
Love Interest(s):  Edward Elric
Best Friends: Li Shan/Sean Lee, Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric
Friends:  Winry Rockbell, Ling Yao/Greed, Lan Fan, May Chang/Xiao May, chimeras, Paninya
Enemy(ies):  Father Cornello, Father, Pride, Lust, Envy, Wrath
Hero(es):  Helena Passas-Terzi, Riza Hawkeye, Izumi Curtis
Rival(s):  (Jokingly) Edward Elric, Roy Mustang
H: Though you didn’t have much room to do so here, I’d expand on her relationships and how they formed. Maybe Ed took her in when she appeared in Amestris? That would explain most of these relationships, seeing as Ed knows all of these people, but how would she know Cornello and the homunculi? Does she appear in the show’s timeline? Alternatively, does this happen after the show, but do these enemies come back? This could be a great opportunity for some incredible word building.
Quote(s):  “This-this automail, this body, doesn’t define who you are.” “I don’t really do ‘healthy’ amounts of sleep when there’s work to be done.”
History/Backstory:  
Indie was born in Chicago, Illinois. She is the only child of Helena and Dion Terzi, and was named after her dark blue eyes. She grew up in a cozy apartment in the city, always healthy and happy. Both of her parents were artists (Helena was a painter while Dion was a composer), and they heavily encouraged creativity in their daughter.
Indie was always drawn to creative outlets, and was frequently doodling, writing, and humming. However, she also knew that her parents wouldn’t tolerate failure (or perhaps, she realized later in life, it was her who wouldn’t accept it), and therefore did very well in school. Though she wasn’t disliked, per se, her classmates found her a bit strange, given her unusual intellect and shy tendencies.
Helena, a long time Chicago resident, knew how dangerous the city could be. She signed Indie up for aikido so that she could learn self defense. Indie was decent. She wasn’t a top-notch, best in the country student, but she knew enough to the point that she could defend herself without harming her attacker.
While in elementary school, Indie’s nose was always buried in a book or notebook. She was fascinated by higher level education and entertained herself by doing things like memorizing the periodic table. It wasn’t because she wanted to show off. She simply enjoyed memorizing and trying out new things. She didn’t know that it would annoy her classmates to the point where they would tease her viciously, picking away at her insecurities. The teasing eventually got so bad that Indie would claim to be sick to get out of school. This happened so often that Dion took Indie to the doctor, who said nothing was wrong.
E: Does she have another mental illness? Some illnesses can give people a wider memory and an aptitude with higher level thinking. (What was described seems a bit unnatural for a neurotypical person of that age.)
As a result, Helena and Dion became worried and took Indie to a psychologist, who diagnosed her with social anxiety and depression. Indie was put on medication and moved schools to a private school for her middle school and high school years.
It was here that Indie flourished. She was still quiet, but, with encouragement from Dion, tried out for the musical in sixth grade, and, to her surprise, was cast. It was a small chorus role, but a role nonetheless. And thus Indie’s passion was discovered. Musical theatre became a second home for Indie, and she came out of her shell when she went onstage. She gained self-confidence as she moved up the ranks of the cast. She became very close to a stage manager named Sean Lee (birth name Li Shan), but no, they do not date, they’re just close friends.
Overall, Indie’s life was looking up. And then she saw that damn red stone.
Trivia/Fun Facts:
Indie’s blue eyes were inherited from her maternal grandfather, Petros
Indie’s father, Dion, came from Greece to Chicago to study, where he met Helena. His parents still remain in Greece and visit every few years
Her first leading role was Elphaba in Wicked
Lola played Glinda
Indie’s favorite color is actually purple
The reason Indie was able to pass through the Gate and not give up any limbs or her voice is that she had a necklace containing a Philosopher’s Stone that her grandmother had sent from Greece for her 14th birthday
H: I think this is a really important fact that should be expanded upon. Did her grandmother know about the stone or did she not know about its power? How did she come across it?
Indie is allergic to bee stings
Helena and Dion actually were going to have a child before Indie, but Helena suffered a miscarriage, meaning that Indie was a miracle and a blessing to both of them
Indie practically generates warmth, and is often hugged by Sean, who is perpetually cold
Indie’s favorite book (besides Fullmetal Alchemist) is Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
H: Unless I’m reading into this wrong, Indigo comes from a world that knows about FMA into the actual FMA universe. Does this mean that FMA was based off of a real story/universe? Or did someone create an alternate universe based on the FMA story? To keep your story from getting too complicated, I wouldn’t make FMA exist as a story in her universe, but Indigo isn’t my OC, after all!
E: (THE GOBLET OF FIRE WAS BETTER INDIE CAN MEET ME IN THE PIT!!!!)
Indie’s fear of needles came from when she was about 6 and was given an antibiotic for an infection. The antibiotic had a side effect of delirium, and, when the doctors came to draw blood, Indie saw nothing but the needles and though she was going to be stabbed
The total number of notebooks that Indie has filled with stories, notes, personal poems and songs, or choreography throughout her life is around 25-30
Indie loves games involving memorization, like Memory and recreating sequences
Indie’s brown messenger bag is like a safety blanket, and she never leaves anywhere without it
It was a gift from her parents for Christmas when she was 11
H: I really like these small tidbits, even if they don’t contribute to her story! They make Indigo seem very real and imperfect.
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E:  You write really well! Keep up the good work! I love your character. She’s very fleshed-out and realistic (to the point where I think she’s based off of someone real!) and with any free time you have, I think it’d be ideal that you pursue her story!
Also, on an ending note, you can also have fun bending canon if you want! Sure, Winry might end up with Edward at the end, but if you want her to fall in love with Paninya (for whatever reason,,, ;O ) you can!
But with OCs, usually the problem lies in the power that you give them. Remember, even though the content is free for examination and recreation, if you want a realistic (ha ha, realistic, it’s anime, but you get what I mean) character, you need to make sure you don’t give them a god-like ability and a perfect life. Mistakes happen. One day, in a tragic accident, a character might lose a leg halfway through the story.
(That’s confusingly worded, but to put it in simpler terms, every character messes up. Also, to keep the story realistic, not every character has to emerge in one piece.)
 H: Overall, I also really liked Indigo. I feel that she’s very realistic, and I don’t see many things you could change with her character that would improve her. The worldbuilding can be explored a little, but I think you’ve already created an interesting beginning that could make an awesome story. There’s a lot of great potential in this, and I encourage you to keep working on it!
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theochelpsquad · 8 years ago
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