these-little-secrets-of-mine - Tumblr blog

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

by @jenniiyang http://ift.tt/1QhyUea

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

I fell too much in love too hard, too quickly.

The first time I told you I loved you was a mistake

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

we never really went far, always arm's length apart, with our fingertips touching.

i never took a step towards you, because i was afraid, and you never did the same for the same reason.

i regret it too much to describe. i regret not stepping closer so i could find out what you felt like.

and it makes me wonder if you would feel like warmth that matched your hair or if you'd be cold like you say you are.

i'll never know now because i stopped walking alongside you. we were no longer so close yet so far; we became farther from each other.

i never called or messaged or wrote. i just up and left.

and now you've found someone else to walk beside. and they're so much closer to you than i ever was.

you two aren't arm's length apart, your fingertips just touching. there is no space between the two of you. you're shoulder to shoulder.

- c.

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

but cant you see how much i still love him? cant you see how much i miss his arms around me and his fingers intertwined with mine? i cant stand how much i wish he would tell me he cared and loved me just one more time. so please stop talking about how much you like him and how much he likes someone else. please stop torturing me by telling me how much better he is without me because i cant stand it. i cant stand the constant crunching of the shards of my broken heart under your feet and his and hers whenever you tell me how much you love him and he loves her and she loves you.

"love triangle" - what i want to say to you, my best friend, but can't seem to spit the words out

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

she is a burning fire it burns and scorches and hurts if you come too close you leave with blisters but if you come close enough you feel the comforting warmth i feel the comforting warmth and of course i’ll get burnt every now and again there is no denying that but it is the reason why i have such a high pain tolerance i will get as close as i can i will because that fire lights me to do so many things she is a burning fire who will hurt you if you get too close but we all need fire to survive

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

i am, tbh, so fucking pathetic it isn't even funny anymore

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

i want to talk to her but it's late where she is and i'm not sure if she's awake

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

i can't help but wonder if she thinks of me as much as i think of her

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

for some reason i hardly feel anything

maybe it was because i made it too obvious

maybe she already knew

either way she knows now

and for some reason i don’t feel anything

just this weight on my chest

i thought a burden would be removed from these shoulders

instead it seems like i now have one to carry

- c.

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

i want to dream, but dreaming requires sleeping. and even then, it's never guaranteed you'll dream

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

No one ever wants to talk to the depressed kid. Not even here.

(via these-little-secrets-of-mine)

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

colors and swirls, a girl with red eyes.

tea and roses, a place full of lies.

a trip into a hole, at your own expense

she's following a rabbit, she's fallen into a mess,

wonderland she's fallen into, a place for the mad.

a maze for the insane, a land for the grand.

"eat me" and "drink me" magic, behold.

bigger then smaller and bigger again, this never gets old.

- c.

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

i fucking regret everything

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

people have told me to wait and see,

but i have no patience

because i never had any patience with myself,

and i grew to want to speed things up

because of how much i hate who i am.

- c.

[these-little-secrets-of-mine]

why do i have to be so selfish?

of course she isn't going to think of me

day in and day out or

every single minute of every single day.

of course she knows more people than

just me.

of course i'm not on everyone's mind

because i don't matter all that much.

- c.