thevoicesimyheadarejerks

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I love watching documentaries about amusement park accidents because all of the park officials are saying, "Oh, dear god, none of us could have anticipated that the roller coaster car would detach, this is a freak accident, an act of god!" and then the narrator is like "The Dicktwister 9000 was a known safety hazard and rabies vector since its inception. It was designed by disgraced Cirque du Soleil clown John Roosters, who had never seen a math textbook."

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They’re all different but I love them so much 😂

Writer: There Was Only One Bed…

Smut fans: *gasp!!!!!*

Writer: So They Spooned All Night And The Brooding One Allowed Themselves To Feel Vulnerable For The First Time In Years And The Chirpy One Got Some Quality Snuggles

Fluff fans: *GASP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

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Finally! Here’s my contribution to the Valor Anthology, “Bride of the Rose Beast”. Valor is a book I’m still so happy and honored to be a part of, and you can still get the 300+ page ebook HERE for $5! Enjoy!

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Do u ever just become uncomfortably aware of ur own eyelashes

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Megas vs Mystery Machine

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Was prompted to paint this guy real fast and I….

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Movie Review Monday- Sunday edition!

-Always Be My Maybe: 8.8/10 Eggplant Parfaits 

-What Men Want: 7/10 Sister-psychics

Always Be My Maybe: This movie was one of those lighter, feel-good movies you watch during a bubble bath or in PJ’s curled up with a blanket. It has a simple premise and does a great job keeping things funny and entertaining while still adding a layer of depth that makes it easy to follow along with and relate to.  Netflix consistently does a great job making movies that are relatable and well-written. This one makes a lot of jokes about “fancy” food which I personally loved. We might not all be celebrity chefs but most of us can agree that a noodle wrapped around a fig is not enough for a full meal. And A+ casting! I like most of Randall Park’s roles and this was no exception. Also, (Mini spoiler alert)- Keanu Reeves is in this and he’s hilarious. Not necessarily his character himself, although he is quite amusing, but the role he plays in the movie and the jokes made about it are just amazing. In addition to great acting, the dialogue is well-written. I love the banter between the friends and family- it felt like something you would actually hear real people say. AND THE MUSIC!!! Two thumbs-up! Both the soundtrack for the film and the music that Park’s character performs with his band in the movie- very funny and also quite catchy. Overall, this film accomplished what it set out to do. I definitely recommend it for a movie night with friends or even just a night in by yourself. Go get some popcorn and watch it! :)

What Men Want: This movie looked really funny when I first saw the trailer and I was so stoked to see it, but never actually got around to watching it in theatres. It’s a good movie, I’ll give it that. I would say that it hit the mark for comedy, although I have to attribute it entirely to the actors- they did a great job with their roles and really brought the movie to life. I believe the premise has been done before in “What Women Want”, directed by Nancy Meyers back in 2000. The idea is the same- an advertising executive gains the ability to read the minds of the opposite sex. Now, I haven’t seen the original film, so I can’t compare it to this one, but I will say that this one was good. It has a variety of different characters, so there seems to be one for everyone. My personal favourite was the assistant, Brandon Wallace, who’s played by Josh Brener. And of course, I gotta mention my boy Alec Hardison! Aldis Hodge did a great job playing Will, the kind, funny, and super attractive love interest. 

***Quick Spoiler Alert! I did not like when Ali, used him as a fake husband without telling him. I Personally prefer the trope where both people know and agree to pretend and it turns into something real.  It usually lends itself to more comedic opportunities and growth. I don’t think manipulation and lies make for a good basis to any relationship and it was well deserved when Will walked away from her, I didn’t feel bad for her at all.***

It did have some great scenes between Ali and her dad which I liked. When it comes to the end of the movie, it wrapped everything up well and didn't have any loose ends, which I can appreciate. Overall, I think the movie was good and I would give it a middle-ish rating of 7 for the comedy. I would watch it again, and probably recommend it for a good laugh. 

Happy trails, friends! Have a great week! :)

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Oh dear

Hey guys. EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE who reblogs this post BY MAY 5TH 2019 will be getting a small monster design based on your blog theme, name, or profile picture. Let’s go.

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My Doctor Who OTP

ten being protective of rose

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I really really wish I was a cat, I’m not built for this capatalist society but I am built for sleeping 19 hours a day and knocking things over

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Me: *Aggressively wants to be happy*

Me: *Is aggressively depressed*

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Why is it so hard to find reference pictures that fit what you want to draw?

I’m terrible at drawing people so I usually use a reference image for human outlines, but searching “Girl crouching over body” gives me things like these???

Like no???

I’m trying to draw someone crouched over a dead body in the woods, not any of these???

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My mother just FaceTimed me for the sole purpose of telling me my cat was sitting on her head

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If you like more of this, follow @psych2go​. Can you guys let us know what you think of these graphics and if you would like to see more? Also, we have a store here: http://psych2go.bigcartel.com/

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Movie Review Monday- Christmas Movie Edition!

We’ve got two Christmas flicks up for review today: The Grinch (2018) and Christmas Wedding Planner.

-The Grinch: generous 7/10 salty green grumps

-Christmas Wedding Planner: 3/10 bride-to-be Christmas trees

Un-spoilered score summary: Although The Grinch wasn’t a particularly exceptional movie, it was exactly as advertised. It was the perfect feel-good family movie to take your kids to, with great visuals (it was a very pretty movie) and cute characters. It’s not a bad movie but it doesn’t hold a candle to either of the original Grinches.  As far as “Christmas Wedding Planner” I was thoroughly disappointed the entire movie. It looked poorly done, as if it was written and edited by an amateur. There were too many long pauses and forced comedy, it didn't flow right. It wasn't funny. It was predictable in a bad way. It seriously made me question why I was still watching it. I wouldn’t watch it again.

ALRIGHTY NOW FOR THE RAW, HONEST TRUTH STRAIGHT FROM MY CRITICAL MIND WELCOME TO CYNICAL CINEMA FOLKS

-Let's start with The Grinch: This movie wasn’t bad. I gave it a, in my mind generous, rating of 7 out of 10 simply because it was straightforward. It was exactly what it was advertised to be, and it was pretty well done. There were funny moments, sad moments, and some really pretty graphics. It would easily lose in a competition with either of the earlier Grinch movies, but standing alone it wasn't bad. The plot was predictable, of course, since most of us have seen one or both versions of The Grinch Who Stole Christmas or heard the tale in some form, but they changed up the characters a little bit. They drastically humanized The Grinch so that instead of being an evil creature with a heart three sizes too small (although the movie says that’s still true, we don’t really see it all that much), he’s really just a grumpy introvert with a distaste for commercial holidays. Relatable. It was hard to see him as the bad guy most the time, and much easier to get behind his whole “steal Christmas” plan. Cindy Lou Who was your everyday overly-energetic kid who wears lots of pink, and her mom was a single mom of three kids, which was conducive to the plot but also detracted from the fantastical aspect of the movie. It made her seem more human and less of a who. When writers make changes like that, it becomes harder to see them as anything other than human, and the movie loses its whimsy. It was very much a modern take on the Grinch. It still had some of the charms the original story had, just with an ultra-modern twist. The best part of the movie was easily Max. The greatest thing about it being a modern-day animated movie was that the creators could give so much personality to the dog. Max had distinct facial expressions, personality traits, and mannerisms that the earlier versions didn’t. He was by far the cutest character in the film and easily my favorite. All in all, it was a decent movie by itself, very pretty and perfect to take the kids to, but if you are a hardcore fan of the earlier Grinch then you might be disappointed. I’d watch it again, but only with friends. 7/10 would recommend for some low-key festivity.

-Christmas Wedding Planner: This movie was almost as big of a disappointment as my life is. I swear that over half the time I was watching this, my only comments were “Why?” “No” and “Please stop”. It might have left me with a semi-permanent angry face. It was like the writers took every stereotypical cheesy Christmas movie and said “ok, we’ll throw that in,” without actually developing the ideas. The characters were stale and stereotypical, like cheap-grade archetypes, and the plot was pathetic. You could go through with a checklist and tick off the boxes one by one. “Relateable” main character with tragic backstory? Check. Mysterious love interest? Check. Unneccesary drama that was solved way too easily for it being ‘such a big deal’? Check. Sickly sweet happily-ever-after? Check.  The majority of the conflict could have been solved by the characters just talking to each other and actually thinking things through before acting. It was cheap, shallow, and poorly developed. Now don’t get me wrong, I love cheesy romance movies, especially at Christmas, but I have some sort of standards. This just felt like the writers went “Oh, we need some comedic relief? Here,” And threw something in that wasn’t actually funny just to say they could check off the box. I didn’t have particularly high hopes for the movie to begin with but it dashed even those expectations. 1.5 of the stars I gave it were entirely because Kelly Rutherford was in it. I wouldn’t suggest watching this movie unless you like white noise and need something vaguely christmas-y to play in the background while you do more worthwhile things.

I will most definitely be watching more Christmas movies since the season of commercialized festivity is upon us (Kidding- I love Christmas), and if any of y’all have any suggestion for some good ones, let me know! I’d love to check them out. As always, if you agree or disagree with anything you’ve said or wanna talkk about movies or anything, shoot me a message. I’d love to hear from you! I hope y’all have a very merry Monday and a happy rest of the week!

Until next time, happy adventuring fellow nerds! :)