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Nara Park. Some of the many photos we took. 

奈良公園

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LDR During a Global Pandemic (USA/Japan):

It’s been a while since I’ve last decided to post to this blog, and I don’t really know who will see this but I figured I’d let my thoughts out. Since I last posted, life has drastically changed—but I think it has for majority of the world.

I never thought in a million years I’d be facing a situation like this. Borders shut, travel restrictions/bans… probably are a long distance relationship couple’s worst nightmare. Before this happened, I usually had a stable idea of when the next time would be that I see my significant other. Of course, that was still tough to have to deal with because of having to separate after the visits. BUT I never thought that I would have NO IDEA of the next time I would see him again. That is by far the most frustrating thing about all of this. I used to have some comfort in having a bit of say in when I’d see him, but now that I literally have no control over it is infuriating.

Originally earlier this year I was supposed to see him ( way back in March before everything had closed down) but because the news of all this was starting up around that time and it was so uncertain we decided it was a safer option if I were to cancel the trip. At the time there was some talk about borders shutting but it wasn’t for sure— so because I still was working and going to school we didn’t want to risk something going wrong. We didn’t think it would become so horrible though.

I think many people can relate that this year took a lot out them and took a toll on their mental health. To others that have faced similar feelings, I sympathize and am hoping the best for you. To others, I’m glad if you’ve done well, and I hope that you continue to do well!

As for the fate of this blog, I think I might try to get back into writing more regularly but for now I just wanted to do a check-in/ update about what’s been happening!

If anyone reading is going through a similar experience feel free to add your thoughts to this!

Stay safe everyone, be careful out there.

We will get through this year!

-Deanna

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My First Trip to Japan (and traveling alone)

This whole trip felt surreal to me— but it was a great experience overall and really pushed me to get out of my shell more.

Let me start off by saying, I’m extremely shy. After traveling to Japan I realized quite quickly I don’t fit the stereotype of a typical American by Japanese standards AT ALL… aside from being a natural blonde that is, and I may be an American but I’m certainly not “outgoing and loud”.  As a small child I was always known for being the “quiet one”, I never liked being the center of attention and to this day I still think that is accurate.

This is why throughout the course of my relationship with my boyfriend, Keita, he’s always said I don’t “act American”. Of course, this is not meant as an insult or meant as a way of telling me that I’m having an identity crisis and that I “need to act MORE American”. It just means those stereotypes about Americans that Keita grew up knowing, do not usually apply to me, and it’s kind of shocking to him. I digress. The point of giving all this background information on my shy personality is meant to show just how different this trip was for me, at least personality wise. In social situations I usually share the same social graces as a rock, meaning when I’m placed in situations where I find myself feeling anxious or uncomfortable, I turn dead silent. The whole idea of traveling doesn’t bother me, I wasn’t nervous about the plane ride (despite it being my first one) and I wasn’t nervous traveling alone. I was just nervous about interacting with other humans, hence why Customs and TSA were my NIGHTMARES.

Obviously, since I’ve returned safe and sound from my trip, nothing horrible happened to me. I don’t have any true horror stories from my travels. I wasn’t detained by Japan’s Customs, and upon returning to America and going through customs here officials didn’t hold me down or place me in a room for questioning when I returned home with like 10 plushies from the Pokemon Center that I visited while I was there. However, going through both made me feel like I was going to be read my non-existent criminal record and told about that one time that I was reprimanded by my teacher in 3rd grade. It really wasn’t too bad, but those situations made me feel anxious because of how serious the workers (I’m looking at you America) are about their job. Japan’s Customs system is strict as well but not nearly so. (The customs official literally asked me like 3 questions and I was sent on my merry way.)

Aside from that for the most part, the trip went relatively smoothly aside from culture shocks that I adjusted to rather quickly. Once I arrived in Japan, I had some major culture shocks almost immediately. Even if I expected some of these things, to experience them first hand is something entirely different from just learning about them. For example, there is a correct way and a wrong way to use an escalator in Japan that I NEVER experienced before in America. Clearly, I had always been doing it WRONG all these years. I was used to standing side by side on a step if I was with someone on the escalator. In Japan this is WRONG (or at least in Tokyo it's incorrect). When I did that at the airport after meeting with Keita the first thing he asked me was, “what are you doing?!” I looked at him like “WhAt dO yoU meAn? I’m riding the escalator. ._.” Apparently in Japan on an escalator there are 2 “lanes” if you are standing on the left side you are usually just riding the escalator up or down. The right side is meant for people to walk past the people standing to the left. After looking around, I quickly realized my mistake and only made sure to make that mistake one more time before not doing it again.

Other than the awkwardness that came along with traveling, this trip was amazing. I was able to make many amazing memories in Japan. And so, returning to the states felt ultimately bittersweet. This post is getting quite long though so just consider it an introduction to my travels in Japan.

Stay tuned, more stories from this trip shall come soon along with some pictures!

—Deanna

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Preparing For My First Trip To Japan:

The time has finally come, and it’s been over a year to plan for this. I will finally be visiting Keita in Japan this March! Keita and I have been together for almost two years, and up until this point, it’s been him visiting me in the states. I feel like this wasn’t fair to him always being the one to visit, so now it’s not. This trip will be full of many firsts for me. My first time riding in an airplane, my first time traveling alone, but not my first time outside of America. (I’ve been to Canada, I’m from a state that borders Canada so it’s only a short drive away.) But it will be my first time to a country whose native language isn’t English. I can already feel my head spinning, but I am excited to be going on this adventure, and I won’t be alone.  Preparing for this trip however has been a long process so I felt like sharing it with you.

Firstly, I had to obtain my passport. When I traveled to Canada, I was very young. At the time, the law only required proof of identification and a birth certificate to travel there, so I’ve never gone through the process of obtaining a passport and I had no idea where to go. After some googling, I learned that I could just go to my local post office. (It made me chuckle to learn about this, a post office? Is it because I’d be shipping myself? Human air-mail!) I digress— I filled out the paperwork and brought the required documents to give to the post office to process, I even was able to get my passport photo taken there. This whole process was relatively quick. I booked an appointment online and was able to get in the same week. After the appointment, I just had to wait to get my passport. Usually, at least for the US postal system, they say to allow between four and six weeks to allow for processing and to receive the passport in the mail. I think I was lucky because I managed to get it within two weeks! I still advise if you need to apply for a passport, allow ample time to receive it in the mail.

After receiving my passport, Keita and I decided that I would visit him for three weeks in March and bought my plane tickets over the holidays when he came to visit for Christmas. Great! We’ve done everything we need to in order to get ready, now to wait— Nope. It’s not quite that simple. After purchasing the ticket, I knew it was time for me to get some new luggage for my trip. I’ve never actually gone on a trip for quite so long, that being said, that means that none of the luggage I currently own would be big enough for my trip. (However, when buying luggage I had to keep in mind the size that would be allowed on the flight). My advice to everyone, READ OVER THE REQUIREMENTS on the airline’s website, and if something doesn’t sound right, call them! It’s best to get it sorted before your trip. It will save you a headache later.

Finally, the last piece I will address is about bringing medication with you.  I’ve heard that Japan is more strict than the United States about certain drugs in medications. Knowing this, made me feel anxious. I knew that Japan allows people to bring up to a 1 month supply of medication without requiring extra paperwork. This was fine, I don’t need more than that. However, I have a couple health problems, nothing too serious, but they require prescription medicines. I tried to look up what specifically is allowed and isn’t allowed but was never given a clear answer; instead, I just ended up with more questions.  I found that the best place to contact is the Consulate General of Japan that oversees my part of the United States. I was able to email someone about my question and they got back to me in a short amount of time which was great! Everything turned out to be fine, as long as I provide a doctor’s note and prescription copies of the medicines that are prescribed. OTC (over the counter) medicines don’t require that extra step. If anyone had similar questions to me, I hope this helped!

All in all, I’d say that preparing for this trip has gone rather smoothly, and I am looking forward to March.

Off to Japan~!

-Deanna

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There’s no one I’d rather be with than you.

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Busy Schedules and Time Zones:

I know, I know, time zones are an annoyance to everyone that is in a long distance relationship whether it be between two separate parts of the country, my American friends can relate, or between two entirely different countries on opposite parts of the world (the type Keita and I experience). Regardless, I think everyone can agree that time differences suck for the most part. For example, You want to talk? Oh, it’s still 5am in the other person’s part of the world, it’ll be a few more hours before you should try to talk to them. Prepare for late nights or early mornings in order to get the maximum amount of talking time. This is why coffee has become my best friend— No, but seriously, there will be very, VERY late nights staying up chatting, or early “Good Morning” calls.

Since Keita lives in Japan, for the most part, we do most of our talking in the mid-afternoon/ night, at least in my time zone. For him, since he is 16 hours ahead for half the year, 17 hours during the other half, our chats usually are a part of his mornings and mid-afternoons. For the most part we’ve been able to manage this, however, sometimes I wish that we could switch the roles sometimes. It’d be nice to have the option to talk (texting or FaceTime) in the morning/ early part of my day. If I were to try though, that’d be at some ungodly hour for him and vice versa. Somehow, we’ve been able to manage schedules that allow us to at least text every day, even if it’s just for a little bit. I’m grateful for that, makes the distance between us slightly more bearable. I think there are some things to keep in mind when in a long distance relationship, I’ve composed a list that I think sums up the frustrations/ tips to keep in mind:

Calling can be hit or miss: There will be times that WiFi is my worst enemy and the call is practically unintelligible, but there will be others when WiFi will DEFINITELY save on phone data costs. Without WiFi, those long multiple hour calls wouldn’t be possible.

Pro Selfie Taker: At first it felt weird taking selfies of myself and sending them so often. Eventually, I got used to it though. When you can’t see your partner every day, you gotta work with what you have. Selfies are a great way to feel more connected to each other.

Good Morning/ Good Night texts: I don’t think I can name a day where we haven’t at least been able to message each other something like that. It lets the other person know that they are being thought of, even if it’s a small gesture.

*This one may not be as relatable for some people* Large time difference benefit: Because Keita and my time difference is so big, I’ve actually been able to schedule my work around it (at least currently). I tend to enjoy getting my work done in the morning, so I usually plan to do most of my things in the morning/ early part of the day for me, leaving my schedule wide open for when he wakes up.

Of course, that doesn’t always mean we have an abundance of time to talk. There will be days where we don’t get to say much to each other, those are the days that I need to remind myself, the distance won’t be forever, it will end someday, I just need to endure it. It’s easier said than done, for obvious reasons it’s frustrating. But I’m in this relationship for a reason, and if given the choice, I’d choose it all over again. This is worth it.

-Deanna

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Language Barriers.

I’d like to say that we are couple that has no issues with communication. But that would be a lie, but not in the way that you might be thinking. It’s not as though we argue a lot, in fact, we are quite the opposite. For the most part, we never argue. We talk to each other about problems and try to understand each other’s point of views. The act of communication with each other isn’t the issue. The issue is the language (sometimes)—what we say isn’t always exactly what we mean.

I don’t mean like we will get in an argument and say something in the heat of the moment and come to regret it later. I mean, we will say something, and what we actually mean is entirely different. To say the least, I’ve thought either we were going to fight or break up a few times due to unfortunate misunderstandings.

Thinking back to that, it makes me cringe. But it is that cringe feeling that has encouraged me to make this post. Let me tell you about my terribly awkward moments that caused the misunderstanding. It’s usually my overthinking that causes these misunderstandings. Also, the use of phrases specific phrases in English might actually have a different meaning that a non-native speaker would not know.

For example, the phrase, “I want to talk to you about something,” could be taken multiple ways. My mind immediately will think, “something must be wrong. Is there a problem? Am I the problem!? Did I do something that upset him?” But the phrase isn’t always negative. That phrase could mean that he has good news that he wants to share or even, that he just wants to talk.

To say the very least, I’ve been given grey hairs before my time. Granted, it wasn’t his fault. This is something to remember when entering into an international relationship, language differences will sometimes cause misunderstandings. The important thing to remember is that being able to talk things through will help in the long run, be quick to try to figure out a solution or come to an understanding, and slow to becoming frustrated in situations like this.

-Deanna

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“One day we won’t be miles apart, we will only be inches away”

—

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Long Distance

If hands could reach right through this screen

I’d rest your head upon my knees

I’d stroke your hair ‘til you believe

That we’ll conquer our hopes and dreams

This year like those now too shall pass

And though at times it won’t be fast

We’ll close the distance with our words

Which now the world will all have heard

And…

If hands that write could bring you close

I’d write enough to bear us both

I’d write until my fingers bleed

You must believe you’re all I need

// A.S

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“I visualize a string that connects me to you. 

I can picture it becoming longer and longer the day of your flight; as we separate the string continues to lengthen. You have to check in for your flight and then check your bag. Afterwards, we’ll reunite briefly, able to spend some time together before you have to leave. Our interactions with each other are almost silent, not wanting to talk about what is about to happen. I just want to watch you, hold your hand and be by your side for as long as possible. I wish that in this moment, time would stop, and we wouldn’t have to say good-bye again. The dreaded moment comes, and I try to hold back the tears—I don’t want that to be the last thing you see before we have to be separated. I’ll hug you, then give you one last kiss and try to smile for you before we walk away from each other. I’ll look back, and my smile will falter as I watch you walk away. You’ll head to the TSA check, to a place where I can no longer be by your side. I’ll rush to the window that allows me to see a glimpse of the gate area where I am able to take one last glimpse of you in the flesh before you walk to your boarding gate. A layer of thick glass separates us as if to symbolize the distance that is already forming before my eyes, and in my heart—it aches. Heading home from the airport after having to take you there the morning of your flight, that’s when I can really feel the distance sink in.

 As my car pulls out of the parking garage and your plane takes to the sky, I can feel the string tug on my heart as it lengthens for miles and I wonder—do you feel it too?”

__Refection, Deanna (ticketotokyo.tumblr.com)

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I hate waiting, but if waiting means that we’ll eventually get to spend every day together, I’ll wait for you for as long as it takes.

Follow us @ldrdiariess for more LDR quotes & advice from 6 LDR couples (via ldrdiariess)

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[Rant] Counting in Japanese is My Enemy

Let me explain. Normal counting is quite easy to master after some decent amount of practice is done.

Here is a list of basic numbers:

１（一）いち ichi

２（二）に ni

３（三）さん san

４（四）よん yon

５（五）ご go

６（六）ろく roku

７（七）なな nana

８（八）はち hachi

９（九）きゅう kyuu

１０（十）じゅう juu

１００（百）ひゃく hyaku

１０００（千）せん sen

To formulate numbers between 11-99, is fairly simple. Such as, if you want to say 22 in Japanese you’d say, “2 tens and a 2” so 22 is, “にじゅうに” (ni-juu-ni) Or,　”二十二”. Simple right? That pattern is used for all numbers between 11-99, and the same pattern follows for counting 100s and 1000s. So, 238 would become ”にひゃくさんじゅうはち”(ni-hyaku-san-juu-hachi) Or,”二百三十八”. So that’s great and all, learning this I was fine with. But then, counters happened.

What is a counter?

It is the ending of the number that is affected by the thing you are counting. In Japanese, there are MULTIPLE COUNTERS to learn. Granted, it could just be because of it being a new language I notice it a lot more, but I feel as though we have nothing like this in English. Now, not all counters are bad, like I can understand when counting ages, days of the week, dates, months, years, and time, because of course, we have that. I’m talking about the specific counters that are involved in counting people and things. You’re probably thinking by now, “Okay, well that doesn’t sound so bad.” And you are probably right, my problem is, …My ability to remember things is horrible. I had a heck of a time trying to remember all the different ways to express to wear things. Which yes, there are multiple ways to do that, it depends on what item of clothing and where on the body it goes. That’s a story for another time, I digress.

I’m obviously not a master of Japanese by any means, in fact, I’m only in my second year of learning it. So this whole counter thing, was news to me when it was first introduced in my text book. I know there are probably more counters, but I’m just going to address the ones that I’ve seen thus far. Those counters are:

こ（個）Ko used for small/round items

さつ（冊）Satsu used for books

ひき（匹）Hiki used for small animals, insects, fish, reptiles, amphibians etc.

ほん（本）Hon used for long, thin objects (pencils, bottles, guitars etc.)

だい（台）Dai used for car, bicycles, machines, mechanical devices, household appliances.

まい（枚）Mai used for thin flat objects (paper, photographs plates, clothing etc.)

り、ひと（人）Ri or Hito used for counting people.

So some examples using a few of these counters would be,

To say, “I gave three new books to my friend”

You’d say, “私は友達に３冊の新しい本をあげました。”

（Watashi wa tomodachi ni sansatsu no atarashii hon wo agemashita.)

Or, if you wanted to say, “I have 2 dogs.”

You’d say, “私は犬を２匹飼っています”

（Watashi wa inu wo nihiki katteimasu.)

The counter is placed right after the number. It’s meant to be an indicator of the thing that you are counting. Though, I’m still not entirely sure why it’s needed, it is required that it is included in a sentence to be considered a grammatically correct sentence. This is what I struggled with when first learning this concept. In English we can simply say “3 books” or “2 dogs” we don’t need an indicator telling us what to expect at the end of the sentence. When this was first introduced in my class, everyone was questioning why we had to add the counter. In a lot of cases in Japanese, parts of their sentences can be omitted (such as the subject of the sentence), unlike in English, we HAVE to have the subject of the sentence.

For example when introducing yourself, in English usually we’d say something like,

“Hello, my name is Deanna.” Or “Hello, I’m Deanna”

In Japanese this would directly translate to, “こんにちは、私の名前はディアンナです。” （kon’nichiwa, Watashi no namae wa Deanna desu.) Or,　”こんにちは、私はディアンナです。” （Kon’nichiwa, Watashi wa Deanna desu.)

But in most cases people would omit saying “I” or ”私”(Watashi) so a lot of the time people will just say,

“こんにちは、ディアンナです。” (Kon’nichiwa, Deanna desu.)

So, in my mind, that raised the question, if you can omit something like that, and the sentence is still grammatically correct, then couldn’t you do the same thing with the counter as long as the noun that is being counted is still in the sentence?

The quick answer to this is simply, no, you can’t.

And to this I say, WHY, JAPANESE, WHY?

ああー日本語は難しいです ！！

~Deanna

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Awww ❤❤❤

ILYC❤.