ultratangerine - Tumblr blog

[ultratangerine]

Three men are in a Russian prison cell

The first man says, “I’m here because I criticized Evgeny Prigozhin”

The second man says, “I’m here because I spoke in favor of Evgeny Prigozhin”

The third man says, “I am Evgeny Prigozhin”

[ultratangerine]

They turned off reblogs the MICROSECOND I pressed reblog, so I need this on my blog IMMEDIATEDLY

[ultratangerine]

reverse gaslighting where i pretend to know exactly what you are talking about

[ultratangerine]

A core feature of modernity that I truly cannot stand is this automatic, knee-jerk sense of smug superiority that people (millenials especially) affect when they talk about the beliefs, practices, or thoughts of men and women who lived in the past. They are completely incapable of being sympathetic to a world that they could never experience, and instead poke fun at any difference a medieval or ancient person might have had from themselves and go "haha look at these stupid idiots, we sure know better now, don't we?" It's fucking infuriating.

[ultratangerine]

Seal noises please?

awawawawawawa.....

[ultratangerine]

[ultratangerine]

what if you went into a bar and the bartender was a fungus-girl and when she gave you your drink she said “you seem like a really fungi!” only some of her spores broke off in the drink and when they reached your stomach they started growing and spreading and entering your bloodstream and at last one reached your brain stem where it planted itself firmly and then your own body started acting against your will and you hiked and you climbed to a very tall place, far above all the foliage, and at last the fungi burst out of your eyes, sprouting into a thousand different intricate colors, and before long a bird girl showed up and started poking at your flesh and you realize in your last moments that this is what it’s all about, you were always meant to join the chain of life only as a single link in some monstrous fungi’s reproductive cycle—and before you can even scream the bird girl plucks your head off with her beak. and and and what if it were like a sexual thing

[ultratangerine]

The Beyond (1981)

[ultratangerine]

It's just the right amount of ass given to the Queen, you fucking COWARDS

hey why did the dead by daylight devs give the xenomorph queen so much ass

[ultratangerine]

[ultratangerine]

This is absolutely fantastic & also, if you told me about Big Sandwich Night without any background context, I would absolutely believe this is a real American holiday

when i was a child my dad made up a fake holiday called big sandwich night the weekend after thanksgiving, during which we got the longest bread we could find and built a big sandwich together and then cut it up and ate it. we got really fancy ingredients and each built our own section of sandwich before cutting it. building the sandwich together represents community or teamwork or something. and then we would put our christmas tree up and the holiday season was officially kicked off with big sandwich night.

i grew up believing this was a real holiday that americans everywhere celebrated until when i was like 8 i asked a friend if they were excited for big sandwich night and they were like what the hell are you talking about riley. kind of shattered my worldview. but we still celebrate it and ive spread the tradition to friends and partners.

big sandwiches of years past:

as weve included more people weve started having to graft loaves together to make a sandwich big enough for everyone. but it still communicates the core idea of everyone eating the same sandwich together in fellowship.

[ultratangerine]

ITS THIS THING TUESDAY

[ultratangerine]

"fuck all men" damn girl ALL OF THEM? thats an ambitious goal but I won't stop you

[ultratangerine]

AAAaaAAAA thank you buddy!! ヽ(✿ﾟ▽ﾟ)ノ

@ultratangerine Omnomnom but whisper.

[ultratangerine]

This is hilariously awful and just a few years ago it would feel like a poignant satire of the rapid microtransactiofication of video games. ...And yet, it's so awful, I find it kinda fascinating. I want to see how deep the rabbit hole goes & I hope the end result is so unimaginably terrible it'll become a meme.

This is a real screenshot of Silent Hill Ascension. Anyone "excited" for this is completely out of their mind or just not aware of what it is. Spend money to vote on what weekly pre-rendered cutscene you get to watch on a streaming service. This is awful.

[ultratangerine]

why did you people come up with russian names for what is supposed to be a movie set in italy. what was the thought process here. why does she sound like she walked out of a tolstoy novel