wellvalwell - Tumblr blog

[wellvalwell]

watched “to the bone” and “little miss perfect” last night just to trigger myself, what the fuck is wrong with me seriously

[wellvalwell]

[wellvalwell]

wanted to go to my last school dance tomorrow but i couldn’t find any good dresses because i felt fat in every single one and the ones i have at home - those are even worse. guess i wont go then..

[wellvalwell]

my cycle is:

wishing i was skinny > restrict > lose a few pounds > overeat > gain back what i lost > restrict even more > have 0 energy and a lot of headaches > give up and eat intuitively > hate myself > binge or overeat until next monday > REPEAT

[wellvalwell]

The 3 are the worst feelings

[wellvalwell]

just eating less doesn't help me at all.. the only way i know that i'll lose weight is through fasting for 24+ hours. but that's the problem here - i don't know how i could fast 2-3 days a week in the spring. it seemed so easy back then. now because of school i'm always hungry and give up on fighting not to eat.

does anyone know how to get it under control?

[wellvalwell]

ana buddies?

i'm in a desperate need of an ana buddy (or many idc), not in need for an ana coach though so please don't message me if you are ((:

[wellvalwell]

fear foods:

curd pie

hot chocolate/cocoa

chips

sandwich machine sandwiches (i use 4 bread slices for them)

milk (and other dairy products)

cereal

chocolate

pancakes

french toast

grapes

nutella

pasta

any sort of tarts and pies

noodles

cakes

safe foods:

apples

broccoli

water

tea

coffee

fast soups

egg white

blueberries

strawberries

rice cakes

sugar-free red bull

activia yogurts?

carrots

almond milk

cucumber

let me know what your fear foods and safe foods are. i'd love to know (:

[wellvalwell]

what makes me sad the most is the fact how skinny i was in the spring.. and now i'm back in the beginning.

how was i able to control my cravings so well back then? why can't i do it now?

[wellvalwell]

coming back for december

i honestly feel like i can't lose weight unless i am active on here and i really have to get it under control so i wouldn't binge when on holiday..

[wellvalwell]

Anyone else feel like they’re never gonna make it to your UGW?

Small rant :

But I’ve been struggling with an ED for YEARS, I can’t remember the last time I felt happy with my body. But I have yet to drop to a low/underweight anything, I’ve always been within the same 20lbs. I feel like I’m losing my mind?

I’ve tried for so many years and I’m starting to feel like there is no hope for me…

I’m just gonna be stuck in a constant binge/restrict cycle

Ok rant over, thanks for reading if you did

[wellvalwell]

Please give me some ed shows/movies im desperateeee

[wellvalwell]

hi! back again, stepped on the scale and ha ha my body must really hate me. i've gained 5 kg in like 2 months......eflkhsfkhdwvlkjdfhvdkjvhv i'm tired

[wellvalwell]

what the fuck is wrong with me.. the second i leave this place, i gain kilograms 5x faster than i lost them. i'm so fucking tired of this shitshow.

[wellvalwell]

Can we all just agree as a community that calories from vitamins, medication, etc don’t count?

I hate seeing you guys not take your meds on fast days. They don’t count, please take them

[wellvalwell]

this user has an eating disorder and does not tolerate fatphobia in any way so if you are/post fatphobic shit get the fuck out of my blog

[wellvalwell]

i hate my mom occasionally.

ever since she found out i fast once a week (actually twice but i'm not telling her about that). she has told everyone about it and then they come and ask me questions like why i do it and etc. stfu let me live.