youngglobalcitizen-blog

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Thoughts on the recent “honor killing” in Lahore

Last week, while reading news online I saw the headline “Pregnant woman, aged 23, stoned to death by own family outside of Lahore High Court”.  To most it might sound like one of the million awful stories in the news each day – but for me it struck a nerve in a way that has only deepened since. 

I’m one month into a three month engagement of working 4-days a week in Pakistan.  The Lahore High Court is just about a mile away from where I stay – where I was comfortably sitting at the moment of the attack.

This proximity was my first thought.  The insanity of something so physically near yet based on such incomprehensible logic or morals.  Our existence was so close, maybe I’ve passed her on the street, we’re even the same age- but our experiences are opposite sides of a coin in a much realer sense than simply life and death.

For your understanding, the basic points of the story are as follows: The woman wanted to marry a man who she loved (and was pregnant by).  Her family wanted her to marry a cousin and so went to the court saying she was kidnapped and raped – trying to get the male put in jail.  The woman was on the way to the court with a declaration saying she was marrying the man out of her own free will.  When she arrived at the court a cousin tried to shoot her, but missed.  Then more than 20 relatives attacked her with bricks, crushing her skull. 

After reading a few articles on the event, I spoke with some family and friends, here in Pakistan and abroad, about what happened.  What I realized was how quick to disassociate people are, and how if I didn’t have the similarity of space, maybe I too would do so.  The idea of “they acting like this" or “their problems" are so easy to consider, what’s more difficult is having this event make us think about the similarity to family quarrels, public violence, and female oppression in our own societies.  Once we acknowledge that these issues exist everywhere, and give it a foundation that we too share- we can begin to explore the differences in extremity and maybe talk about solutions.

A large part of this disassociation is spurred on by the media- especially in regards to the illogical links to this event and Pakistan being a Muslim nation.  Islam fully accepts “love” (self-arranged) marriages and clearly forbids forced marriages, and so shouldn’t play a part in this story.  Why it is used, is to emphasize the difference, making it easier to see the attackers as unfamiliar outsiders.

But pushing beyond this attempt to help our disassociation, we can see the foundation of similarity and how the pulse behind this murder is part of something in every society: sexism and ownership.  Why people find it acceptable to be unkind (whether saying bad things or killing) is because they value others less than they value themselves.  Women most often get the brunt of this oppression because gender is a dichotomy that exists everywhere humanity does, and because it is an easily discernible difference.  In family structures, sexism can take on the role of ownership and modern day slavery- i.e “The daughters’ only value is to the father, rather than to themselves”.  When this value was taken away by the woman deciding herself who she wants to marry, the reaction was to devalue her through murder.  When a parent sees a child’s value as “family reputation” and then the child comes out as homosexual, changes religion, or gets an awful piercing – often they are devalued by being disowned as a way of saying “you have devalued yourself and you do not exist to us or as a part of us”- a symbolic killing.  Or, when a woman in America gets 70% of the salary of a male counterpart, she is being devalued as a contributing employee.  It happens everywhere, very often to women, and through this extreme event we can reflect on how we skew value of others and maybe think about how we can fix that.

What sometimes makes this harder to accomplish, and did very much so in this case, is when a crowd or the public is involved. More than 20 people attacked the couple, and more than 30 (including police officers), were onlookers. Are we so afraid to hold different value systems than others in our own community that we don’t stand up for someone when they are being attacked?!

If your initial thought to the question above was that this would only happen “over there” then consider the viral video from a week or two ago that showed an actor passing out twice on a crowded Western street, once in a suit and another time dressed to look homeless.  When he was in the suit, representing someone that is valued in society, everyone came to his rescue asking if he was okay.  When he looked homeless, and unvalued, not a single person stopped to help. 

It’s scary to think about standing up for someone, especially in a violent situation, but what’s scarier is when no efficient system is in place to ensure this happens.  I’m referring to the on-looking police – which is where the focus of initial reform should be- in proper laws that protect citizens and a police force and judicial system dedicated to righting wrongs.  We need to think about how we can make sure we equally value all persons and also make certain that our governments are doing so; governments should be the role models to their citizens.

Of course, for good story telling, one similarity is usually promoted- that of the victim.  Which is why the headlines refers to her age, pregnancy, and the story to her “love marriage”.  Promoting this familiarity is obviously good- but we need it on both sides so that we don’t just feel bad for the victim but so that we also work to understand our differences with the attackers.  Because only when we deeply consider both, can we truly hope that it won’t happen to ourselves AND make sure we don’t do so to others.

It all sounds good, right? The idea of first finding shared foundations, then understanding the differences, and finally seeing how to bridge those differences to a shared respect for all humanity. . . but is it possible?  How hard is it?

Why this event has caused me so many troubling thoughts is that it’s made me momentarily not so optimistic.  I can write and talk on and on about the theories above because I've studied them closely and I’ve worked in many communities around the world to promote this in small ways- but can change be had with such an insanely low starting point, with a largely unwilling population, and deep societal acceptability (conscious or not) of hatred for others? Can it be done on a large scale?  This situation of course being the same in my home country the USA as well as here in Pakistan and all over the world on various issues.

I ask because this is partly what I’m actually here to be doing, and even more so because it is what I’ve been trying to do the past 6+ years.   This murder showed me how hard the battle ahead is – how deeply these (de)values are ingrained in people.  Can we change anyone’s mind?  Even just a little?

It is the last question that, through these moments of doubt, keeps me going. It is a fight worth pursuing, not one we’ll likely see the finish line of, but one that has rewards with each step.  To stay motivated I just have to focus on those small rewards, and be guided by and push hard for the end-state but not expect it of anyone, including myself.

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

What is “going” to a “country”?

Inevitably when people ask me “how many countries have you been to?” their follow-up is “what counts?”  It’s a really great question as both the idea of “being” or “going” someplace as well as the meaning of “country” are constructed ideas with multiple definitions.

I thought it would be fun to explain some of the different interpretations of these ideas and show how I count where I’ve been.

“Going”

The “how” of travel counting is often the more debated of the two - as it is intrinsically flexible (i.e without changing your definition you can return a different way and then count it, whereas once you define “country” it is essentially static).  The three most common definitions I’ve heard, from most required to least, are:

24-hours:  I have a few friends who only count locations that they’ve been in for more than 24 hours (or sometimes even more- maybe a week!)  They argue that it needs to be more than a quick jaunt and that the location really needs to be taken in.  My thoughts against this methodology is that 1. Some small countries don’t need 24 hours (Liechtenstein, San Marino, etc) and 2. So much can be done in 12 hours! Or even 5!  I’ve walked the beach of Old Town Colonia and posed with elephants in Chobe National Park – so if you tell me I haven’t been to Uruguay or Botswana, I’d be less than convinced.  In fact, there are more than 10 countries I count that I’ve been in for less than 24 hours!  These are mostly in Europe as I’ve done road trips with many stops.

Experience:  Personally, this is how I define “going” somewhere- Asking myself “Have I experienced the country?” or “Can I talk about my time in the country and relate to others who have been?”  Usually I say that I need to have eaten something and seen a famous site. 

Presence: Others say that having been physically located in a place, even in transit, counts as “being” there.  I disagree with this way because I don’t think that an airport really gives the feeling of a place, and politically speaking you haven’t crossed the border.  That said, sometimes when I get stunning views of the landscape while landing and then have some local cuisine at the airport restaurant, I wonder if it counts

“Country”

The more political of the two travel counting debates is obviously what is a “country”.  Despite common belief, there is no real definition of a “country” or a “nation” because different governments recognize various regimes as independent or not.  The perfect example of this being some countries refusing to recognize Palestine and others ignoring Israel.   But the three most used definitions in travel counting, from least inclusive to most, are:

Political: UN Member Nations:  The UN officially has 193 member nations in its main governing body.  However, this does not include a number of largely recognized states (some who are observers and a few other that are members of other UN bodies like WHO and UNESCO) such as Palestine, Western Sahara, and the Vatican.  I generally think that this is a good measure but being the political one, it is a bit slow to adapt to new movements, and also ignores locations that are so different from who they’re governed by (i.e Hong Kong and Macau which are technically part of China).

Cultural- Slight flexibility:  Again, the moderate approach is the one that I use myself.  I think defining “country” or “nation” in a more inclusive and flexible way is useful not only in travel counting, but also in general global understanding, cultural appropriateness, and modern identities.  I generally think of it on a per-country basis and make a judgement call then.  Usually though, my unscientific methodology requires 1. Some level of political autonomy 2. A quite separate cultural identity 3. Other historical and/or economic differences that would mean experiencing one part would not correspond to the other.  Some of these are more obvious to me, like Palestine and Kosovo, and others are more grey-zones like Puerto Rico.

Territories, states, and more:  It is common in extreme travel counting (those who have been to all UN Member Nations, observer states, partially autonomous locations, etc) to make lengthy lists of “countries” or “nations” that may include all 50 US States, all 7 Emirates in the UAE, each island of New Zealand, etc.  This means that lists may exceed 500 or even 800.  The most famous forum for travel counting: http://mosttraveledpeople.com/ uses a few counting techniques but also offers a list of 875 locations they describe as: territories, autonomous regions, enclaves, geographically separated island groups, and major states and provinces.  These are voted upon by their members for inclusion- but in my perusal of it, I’ve found it to be rather Western-centered with districts in countries like the US and Canada being all separate but not those in some major Eastern countries.

Overall- traveling shouldn’t be just about counting all the stops you make.  It is a fun way to plan your next trip or compete in a friendly way – but the real value in travel is the awe-inspiring sites you see, the differently similar people you meet, and the life long memories of experiences had!

The map of the 81 "countries" I will have "been" to by next week

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Waiting Indefinitely

The thing I hate the most in life is not knowing how long I’ll have to wait for something.  You might think that this ten-word phrase could be replaced simply with “impatient”, but it’s more than that. I’m very patient and I’m very good at waiting- if I know how long it will be.  I guess it’s a specific kind of impatience.  Whatever it is, it grates at me like nothing else.  When I’m waiting indefinitely for something, I can do almost nothing else. I become incredibly unproductive.

Usually, the antidote to this type of waiting (in my life at least) comes in the form of an email – communication from someone else who will know my fate before I do.  While waiting for the email, I keep my blackberry in my peripheral vision so that I can see the blinking red dot informing me that some kind of information is there – and I hope it’s from the person I’ve been waiting to hear from. Generally, this information means much more to me than to that person.  They’re only a middleman between my torpid waiting state and the glorious future I’ve imagined if the news is good.

If the news is not positive- the pain normally packs less of a punch than the agony of waiting.  Seriously, I get so frustrated and altered while waiting that hardly any outcome can be worse. This strange behavior has clearly made me skilled at getting over things, which I guess is the bright side, but in all truthfulness, I need to get better at waiting.

I’m currently in this state of waiting with no clue as to when I’ll find out the result- and it is crippling.  I’m surprised I’m evening writing anything!  90% of the past week or so I’ve just been sleeping or binge watching Breaking Bad – the show about the chemistry teacher turned meth manufacturer. Regardless of how phenomenal of a program it is, the show only further brings me down as just about every character in it has a dozen ugly flaws overshadowing any semblance of a redeeming one.

Because of the time spent waiting- everything else is in disarray- my home is not picked up, there is no food in my fridge, I haven’t worked out or gone to the pool, and I’ve read zero pages.  Surprisingly, I maintain a rather social nature throughout the waiting – I’ve gone out nearly each night with friends, and had great times.  But I slouch at the nearly always instant, “how are things going?”, question- because I don’t know. . . yet.  I deflect with a “they’re going” and make the conversation about something, anything, else. 

The biggest fear of course being that if I divulge what the waiting is for, I’ll have to deal with others asking “any news yet?” and if it is bad then having to make the rounds of informing everyone and answering to “oh I’m sorry- that sucks – are you okay?”

I’m fully aware of how dramatic this is.  I know that regardless of any result, I will be “okay”.  I have nothing to complain about, and never have in any of these periods of waiting. In fact, another reason why I’m good at getting over things is my propensity to have many backup plans.  So when one thing doesn’t happen, I’m just on to the next one.  One of my life mantras has been – always be planning 10 awesome things, then if only two of them happen, you’ll still be amazing! And this has worked really well for me. . . but while I’m waiting for one with no deadline, expected announcement date, or other inkling of when I’ll know- pheww! It’s tough!

Well- now that I’ve publically shared how dirty my house is, I feel pressure to clean it up- so will go do that now.  Maybe that’s the solution to my negative reaction to waiting- not saying what I’m waiting for, but being open about how unorganized it makes me!

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Hi! May I know how do you get to travel so much when you only just graduated from university?

Hi!  Thank you for your question! 

It’s actually one that I sometimes ask myself too- I’ve been really lucky and worked very hard and often all of the experiences that I’ve so gratefully had seem unbelievable.

In thinking about the “how” of my travels, I believe there are four things that have enabled me to go so many places:

1. Desire:  the most important thing is wanting to travel, because once you have the will, you can find the way.  But it can’t just be “wanting to get away” you really have to love the whole process- the good (food, people, sights) and the bad (transport, exhaustion, instability).  If you don’t like some of these things, it will obviously be much harder to enjoy traveling.  I really love it and all that I learn, and so that is why I keep doing it

2. Location:  I’m lucky that living in the UAE, I’m basically at the center of the map– only 2 hrs to India, 5 to Africa, 6 to Europe, 7 to Southeast Asia, etc- so I can easily make a 3-day weekend trip to many different places.  In addition, my network of friends and family is all around the world- so visiting others often means traveling somewhere fun!  When I lived in the States it was much harder to travel internationally because even the closest places are 5 hours or more.

3. Time:  A lot of people are surprised when they hear that I’m 23, have been to nearly 80 countries, and have ALWAYS worked and/or studied full time.  But I’ve just always taken full advantage of any short breaks and vacation time.  More than time though is the opportunity- I’ve done much of my work while traveling.  For example, I just did training for work for a week in Austria, and bookended it with visits in Venice and San Marino.  Having opportunities to travel while working is important to me and so I took a job that gave me that.

4. Means:  Of course traveling as much as I do takes money- but there are three points to be made here:  First, traveling isn’t always as expensive as people make it seem, budget travel is definitely possible and I’ve taken advantage of it a lot.  Second, I’ve earned the money for every one of my personal trips since I was 16, I’m not some trust fund baby, I just worked hard and played/traveled hard too.  That said, I’ve had less other responsibilities- I don’t send money back home nor do I have any student loans.  Lastly, means aren’t always money- because I travel so much, especially for work, I have a lot of points on different airlines and with different hotels, and I use those to subsidize my travel immensely!

All in all, I’ve been very lucky on all four of these fronts, and have created a life that maximizes them to a level that has allowed me to travel this much.  At times, I haven’t had one or the other (No desire to leave home, no close place to go, no time off, or not enough means) and sometimes I have them all, but prioritize other things – like being with my family. 

I want to end reiterating the point that none of these four things are difficult to attain to a level that allows for travel- whether you only have time for a weekend getaway or only enough money to go one State over, travel is what you make of it.

Thanks again for the question!  Keep them coming!

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Transit Nigtmare (long form story)

I’ve had my share of awful transit stories – missed flights in the Arabian Gulf, buses taking 36 rather than 24 hours in Africa, sitting for three hours in between two obese men on a small car seat in India, and the infamous never-ending saga of getting into and out of Angel Falls. However, I never quite broke down like I did this past weekend in Northern Italy.

The trip had a foundation of mistaken itineraries and so I shouldn’t have been too surprised at what would end up happening. You see, I had to be in Austria for a week of work training, but some colleagues and I decided to go to Venice and Ljubljana for a few days before it. So, I emailed my travel team and said, “Please book me Abu Dhabi to Venice and then Munich to Abu Dhabi” and I gave them specific flight times and numbers. They responded saying “attached is itinerary as requested, booked but not issued, please confirm for issuance.” I of course responded “Get it!”.

Only about a month later did I realize that they had accidentally booked Abu Dhabi to Venice and then Venice to Abu Dhabi… and I didn’t correct it.

I tell myself that I’ll get it changed later and I take off for the first flights out: Abu Dhabi to Amsterdam to Venice. I have a short layover in Amsterdam so I run through the airport and am lucky to make it to the gate 20 mins before it closes. However, my boarding pass won’t work.

Confused, I ask, “What’s wrong?” and they respond “We thought you wouldn’t make your connection so we changed your ticket.” Flabbergasted I demand “But I did make it- let me on…” “Oh but your baggage won’t- that’s why…” “I’m ONLY carrying on!!!”

And so it continues as I glare unendingly at this not-too-understanding KLM representative. She explains that they’ve rebooked me on a plane nine hours later… but that I can maybe get on the back of the waitlist of one earlier. No, even though it was their fault for pre-maturely rebooking me, I can’t get priority on the earlier one. I sulk away- with my angrily demanded €10 for food and drink and €50 voucher for future flights (which are so hard to use I know I never will), and quickly spend the money on a beer and a sandwich- at 8:30am.

I do end up getting on the earlier flight via waitlist- some Nigerian guy brought his bag to the gate with his friend but then disappeared. The friend put up a fight for the plane to wait- but it didn’t- so I took his seat. I could only imagine him sitting on the toilet not knowing how late he was. One man’s mistake is another man’s opportunity I guess! (As you will see, karma later ate me for this thought) Remember, getting to Europe was not the purpose of this story – though frustrating, it compares only mildly to what happened when I tried to leave.

At the beginning of training I email the travel team asking them how much it would cost to switch my flight out as the faculty had told me it was fine to charge the change, since it wasn’t fully my fault. However… it was impossible. Because my departure flights had been rebooked, I could not change the return ones- even though the rebooking was against my will. The travel team would have to contact the airline directly to change it, and once they did so, they informed me it would cost over a thousand dollars- much too much for the training to pay.

Realizing that my training ended in Kitzbuhel on Friday at 12:15 and my flight back to the Emirates left Venice on Saturday at 5:45, I thought to myself “What is an obsessive journeyer like me supposed to do with these 30 hours?” Answer: Go to San Marino, of course, the tiny mountain nation located within Italy (notice I didn’t write “mountainous” as San Marino is literally just one mountain).

My reasoning for this was that Austria to San Marino was 7 hours and Austria to Venice was also 7 hours. So why not go somewhere new? Of course, then getting from San Marino to Venice would be 3-4 more hours on Saturday, but hey- I had nothing better to do and I love nothing more than sitting in a train or bus and watching the scenery go by (keep in mind here that at night you can’t see this scenery so train / bus travel becomes significantly less exciting).

When training ended promptly at 12:15pm, I quickly grabbed my bags to get to the waiting car. I had to get to the train station in Innsbruck before the train left 1hr and 15 mins later. The drive takes 1hr and 5mins. I jump in the car and say “let’s go!” The seemingly kind (to everyone but me in my hectic state) said that no, someone else had joined my itinerary once they heard there was a car going to Innsbruck- we had to wait.

Seven minutes pass before we see the other passenger. Who might it be? The girl I shamelessly hit on at the drunken dance last night, of course. But not the normal, “hey, you wanna dance?” More like the kind of hit on where no less than nine of your friends act as wingmen /women, getting others away from her (not always peacefully), creating diversions of jealousy, and bringing the both of you drinks (remember we’re strategy consultants- we problem solve everything)… only to find out that she has a boyfriend hours later.

I mutter some rude things under my breath for her tardiness and how I will now miss the train and must take a later one (arriving at 10pm rather than 7pm). I call the B&B I’ve booked in San Marino and inform them that I’ll be late and to please stay up. They say it will be fine- and we’re off. The conversation was humorous and candid- unpacking all the events of last night: why all my friends got involved, how it was completely unknown she had a boyfriend, and ending friendly.

Then, the driver (who probably thought we were insane) announced that we might just make it in time! He had been going through these curvy mountain roads at a pace that made the both of us question our choice of filling our stomachs with only liquid poison the night before. We arrive with a few minutes to spare, I run through the station and make it on the train! Success! I will be in San Marino for dinner! Or so I thought…

A few calm and beautiful hours later I arrive in Verona- my first connection. I have some time, so I go and charge my devices, buy some headphones, and grab a Panini. I look at the board which says the 11:50 departure is from Platform 12. I make my way there, wait twenty minutes and then board the train that will take me to my next stop (and my father’s birth place) Bologna.

An hour into the ride, when we should be nearing Bologna, I get up from my seat, push through the crowded aisle and stand by the door. But Bologna doesn’t come when it should. Instead, “Ala” does. I know something is wrong- I pull out my phone’s GPS and it says I’m way too North. “Hmmm, stupid Blackberry” I think to myself before seeing that the next stop is “Trento.” I am DEFINITELY not on the right train.

In a daze I jump off at Trento, run to the departures board and see that there is another train going to Bologna from there…but it is a slow regional one, and won’t even arrive until 10:25. From Bologna I still have to get to Rimini (another hour) and then take a cab to San Marino (25 mins.) If I’m lucky, I’ll be at the B&B at midnight.

I’m physically tired (no sleep the night before), mentally exhausted (intense training and lots of travel), and sad (after a week of constant team camaraderie, I’m alone) and I don’t know what to do. I weigh my options of just taking a hotel in Trento vs trying to make it to San Marino. Reasons to stay: I’m exhausted and with new tickets and hotel room- it may be more expensive. Plus I know of no hotels and can’t find any quickly online. Reasons to go: New place, I’m young and can handle tiredness, I already have the hotel booked.

I do what I’ve come to do best- sit down on the train to Bologna and passively (through indecision) decide to go to San Marino.

In addition to the map feature, the best part about having a business phone while traveling is global data access. I message my sisters with my predicament and get some good encouragement that at least puts a small smile on my shocked face and makes me feel less isolated. Then, as I sit, close to exhausted tears, an older woman places herself down next to me and asks where the train is going – I answer in my best Italian- and we’re off. I try to sleep, and though she is humming a sweet lullaby (like a little angel sent to me)- I’m too upset realizing I’ll be at least 5 hours late.

When the train gets to my original place of mistake, Verona, it stops- there is a 90 minute wait before it will depart (hence the 5 hours delay even though I only went 1 hour out of my way). I go to the train schedule to see my mistake- and there it is, the ONLY time in the entire day when two trains depart at the exact same minute from Verona (in the exact opposite direction) was the time I needed to be more attentive.

Oh well- here I am. I call the B&B again to say I’ll be in at midnight and she says it’s fine- informs me on how to get into the place, that her old father will be awake, and that the taxi will cost about €25-30. I think that €1 per minute sounds obnoxious- but whatever, I’ve missed the buses. When the slow regional train once again moves away from Verona- I’m excited to at least be on my way. An hour later, I arrive in Bologna- having only 5 mins to find my way to Platform 3. Luckily- I arrive on Platform 2! So all I have to do is walk down the Platform to where I see the train at the end.

When I get there, I push to open the door- but nothing happens… I try again- but still nothing. I move to another carriage, and it also won’t budge. Frantically I look up, searching for any sign of hope- but only despair comes. Bologna has two Platform 3s- one East and one West. I run, but I can’t make it- I see my train leave me (not only the station)- and begin to wait the 35 minutes for the next one.

By then, I’ve accepted my fate- knowing I will now arrive at 1am- really hoping that old man isn’t staying up only for me. I get on the train to Rimini, remember nothing of it, and then get off and quickly find a cab. I tell him “San Marino” and show him a photo of a map I’ve taken on my Iphone- and one final time for the night, I’m off!

Soon however, I begin to get worried. The taxi meter is rising much faster than would make sense for a €25 euro ride that takes 25 minutes… by the time we cross the little border (just a small sign, not even a line on the road) it is already at €40. “Okay, we’ll be there soon” I tell myself- not realizing that we still have to zig-zag up the mountain, as I had booked a room in the Old City Center. When the meter hits €50 though, I start to get worried, I pull out my wallet and see €65… I really hope we’re close.

When we finally arrive- the ride cost €63 (nearly $90). I’m shocked by the event, but not it’s placement in this awful day- and am just ready to be in my bed. The cab driver kindly spends 5 minutes trying to find the way into the B&B before the old man comes out. I check in, carry my bag up two flights of stairs, and pass out in a bed that I might normally be a bit fussy about. However, I was too happy to finally have arrived and looking forward to the next morning in this quaint little nation.

Does the story end here? No- not really. When I wake up the next morning I go and have the second “B” in this B&B arrangement- as was the first, this was quite average- tea with corn bread, sweet cake, and a croissant. It’s like they weren’t sure which bread option I preferred and decided to give me them all. I then stroll to the tourist center which was only a minute away as I want both to know when the bus leaves (I was told “regularly”) and to get a visa stamp (even though it’s Schengen area, you can get your passport stamped for €5- why not?).

The lady at the center may have been surprised I didn’t react more when she told me that on weekends the buses are “less regular” perhaps “infrequent” even and that I had only 90 minutes to catch the next one, and only one that would get me to my flight in Venice on time. But rolling with the punches, I got directions to where it left, asked what I could see on the way, and headed back to the hotel to grab my bag.

Inquisitive as to why I was leaving so early, the old man kindly checked me out and pointed me on my way. I had about an hour for a 25 minute walk, so I went slowly, taking pictures, finding a postcard (only one place sold them!) to send to my niece, and making quick observations on the way this strange but nice place functions. Maybe I’ll return one day- for more than a rest and a stroll, but if not- I do feel like I got my San Marino experience, and I quite enjoyed it.

After making it to the bus, the rest of the journey all the way back to Abu Dhabi is without note. A beautiful bus ride through literally all of San Marino, a couple easy trains, some pasta in the airport, status lounge Bloody Mary in Amsterdam, watching Frozen on the plane, and some traffic on arrival in the Emirates are the few blips I can recall. And now, I’m sitting comfortably on my recliner – taking a little break from work as my boss for the week reviews the document I’ve sent him.

You see, it’s crazy to think of the dynamic nature of comfort, and even crazier to think of how it is mentally controlled and sometimes chosen as an externality of other priorities. When I first knew I missed that train and found out I had 5 (who knew 6) hours left of my journey, I might have felt like those hours would be eternity- never imaging how I would happily be writing about them now. Nor did I fully know that my sister’s kind encouragement or that stranger’s soft lullaby would make the discomfort bearable. Even more, would I have picked to go to San Marino if I knew it would take 13 hours? Of course not, but once it did – I was fine, and it still felt worth it.

You never know how hard you’ll have to work for things in life, you don’t know who will help you or what will stand in your path, and you can certainly never imagine what you’ll give up or gain on the way. What you can do, is to appreciate whoever and whatever comes along and be thankful for the planned and unplanned lessons and experience that life offers you.

San Marino's largest tower

View from San Marino into the valley below

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

2013 the year of superlatives!

I am shocked that the ritual of the 12 months and 365 days has already come and gone, and I am once more reflecting on a jam packed year.  As in the previous three year-end posts, as I look back on all that I did, felt, learned, and made happen this year, I can confidently say 2013 was my best one yet!  The highs were high and the lows were low, and (importantly) I’ve felt mature enough, secure enough, and supported just enough to introspect well on both sides.  

Last year I wrote that in 2011 I was becoming the person I wanted to be, that in 2012 I was being that person- and following this (true) logic, I would say that in 2013 I was testing that person out in the real world.  Looking back I’m very satisfied with the results, but looking forward I’m not yet clear on how I want to / can continue to push this.  I think 2014 will be the real test of whether I can keep up this growth and “best year ever” streak I’ve been on.

Because of how over-the-top this year has been, I thought the best way to write this reflection is with ten superlatives of things I’ve done more this year than any year before!  Enjoy!

1. Growing up- 2013 was truly the beginning of the third part of my life- the first being Indiana until I was 16, the second being my international education at UWC and NYU.  Sure, I’ve aged the same amount this year as the last ones, and been “of-age” for 5 years, but this is the first time I can say, without any thought of an asterisk, that I’m an adult.  And it feels REAL!  For the first few months at work I could happily say that at 22 I was the baby of the office, but soon 23 came around, new youngsters joined and I had to realize that 23 is a strange but wonderful age.  It is unique because it isn’t so young that any success is considered astonishing (significantly fewer “you’re only x years old!!!”) but also isn’t so old that you’re expected to have too much experience. 

2. Awareness and Confidence- Understanding and accepting the differences between what I’m capable of, what I can learn to be capable of, and what I probably can’t be capable of (but still not putting too much in this last bucket) was a great part of 2013.  I don’t think it stemmed individually from having a degree, working at a prestigious company, or the continued support of family, friends, mentors, and mentees, but all of these things combined gave me the confidence that where I’m at is good and the awareness of what I need to work on to be even better. 

  3. Independence – Moving to a new country, making an apartment into a home, managing money, and generally having fewer guideposts have all helped me to move fast and grow.  Of course, I’ll never be rid of helping hands, and I’ll never want to be – but it has been nice to take on more things on my own and even nicer to realize I’m handling them just fine!

  4. and 5. Travel – The past few years of my life have been full of travel, but 2013 takes the cake!  95k miles (150k km or 4 times around the equator) covering 30 countries, being taken there by 100+ flights and trains, over the course of  ~150 nights in luxury hotels, another 40 in hostels, 30 or so on friend’s couches, maybe 10 on planes, and a sad remainder in my own bed.  I’ve been on the move, and it likely won’t stop as I love it and my job requires it- so this year travel gets two mentions

New places - Through work in the Middle East, holidays in Southern Africa, the Balkans, and Central Europe, and weekends around the Mediterranean I’ve experienced so many fascinating and beautiful new places this year.  I’ve been to some of the most beautiful places in Croatia and South Africa and some of the most intriguing (for better or worse) in Bosnia and Saudi Arabia

Returning to my favorites –  In addition to new favorites, this year was also full of returning to some old locations that continue to inspire me- of course moving back to the UAE, spending more time in the villages of Tanzania and Rwanda, and spending time with family in the USA and Germany – I love having familiar places to travel to, and I sense that more and more my trips will be returns in the future.

  6. Religion – Living in one of the most religiously charged parts of the world for 18 of my past 28 months has really pushed me to think long and hard about spirituality and religion: the unfortunate differences between them, the ways in which they can each lead to the other, and the magic / ineffability of the subject and how it affects my life.  My focus waxes and wanes, but this year I have felt myself coming closer and closer to the enchanting and unreachable truths.

  7. Reading – In 2013 I read more than 30 books (mostly on my kindle) and have become once again obsessed with learning through print.  This year’s library included many books on geographies that interest me Rwanda (Antelope’s Strategy, Machete Season, Life Laid Bare, Dancing in the Glory of Monsters), North Korea (Nothing to Envy, Reluctant Communist, and Escape from Camp 14), and Gaza (Meet me in Gaza), topics I like to explore like identity (Ethnicity Inc,  Defining Decade, Exploring Happiness, Memories of Mohammaed) and economics and development (Black Swan, The Crisis Caravan, Capitalism and Slavery, The Elusive Quest for Growth, The Bottom Billion, Emerging Africa, and Outliers and Tipping Point, both by Malcolm Gladwell).  I’ve also made my way through around ten novels (Rules of Civility, Cry the Beloved Country, Middlesex, Diary of a Nobody, Gulliver’s Travel, and Inferno and Lost Symbols by Dan Brown) and explored some more of my favorite author, G. K. Chesterton’s, works with Heretics and The Man Who Was Thursday.  Reading has really been a highlight of this year!!! 

  8. Working – There is nothing I have done more this year than work.  Starting my first fulltime adult job has been an exciting experience and I am happy to be at a place where I am constantly learning.  It is sometimes hard to be within a system that dictates what you learn and when, but nothing can take away the wonderful lessons and amazing mentors I’ve met this year.

  9. Wealth / Points – Another benefit of working is getting paid!  It’s been strange to go from a student’s budget to being able to save or invest most of my earnings.  A lot of lessons come from having money- how to manage it, keep it coming, and how to get the most out of it. One thing I always remind myself of is the hadith that says “It is not a sin to own things, it is a sin for things to own you.”  This is a simple but meaningful thought which pushes me to realize the impact money can have beyond the material, especially through helping others.  What is also exciting is that I have a large indirect income from points earned from all of my business travel!  Tons of hotel upgrades, free flights, and special events make the long hours slightly more worth it!

  10.  Culturally Sustainable Development – At the core of who I am for the past few years has been Culturally Sustainable Development, the idea that development is not just an increase in economic indicators, but an increase in quality of life, the metrics of which are culturally and community specific.  This year I have continued to think through issues of development and identity through the lenses of living in the Middle East and traveling the world, the books I’ve read, and the work I’ve done and hope to continue to do with Trail of Seeds.  More importantly, this year I’ve begun to see not just the destination I dream of taking Culturally Sustainable Development to, but also the path of how that can happen and what I need to push harder to do and learn.

  2013- so full of memories, incredible new lessons, many new friends, and a very new lifestyle!

  Here’s to 2014 being even better!!! 

2012's Year in Review

2011's Year in Review

2008's Year in Review 

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Unorganized thoughts scribbled in the Podgorica bus terminal October 29th, 2013

It's times like today, sitting the bus station in Podgorica, Montenegro, on my way to Pristina, Kosovo, that I think to myself, "my life is awesome and strange!"

I'm sitting in the station bar, joined by three men at a table catty-corner to me.  They all look ragged, and (of course) their story is unclear to me.  Are they also transient travelers?  I don't think so.  Is this their bar of choice on a Tuesday night at 8pm? That seems slightly more likely. 

Despite these usual questions I ask while people watching, another thought is at the top of my mind-  Why is one of those men wearing an entire jean outfit?  Jacket and pants!  Fashion in the Balkans confuses me- and not because of some "this looks better than that" ideal, but because it really shows how disconnected (consciously or subconsciously) this area is from the homogenized global norm.  

All of this said, I think I've quickly grown to hardly question it.  Point proven by the fact that a guy my age just walked into the bar wearing a full sweat suit, and all I noticed was the dog he brought in with him.   A dog in a bar? I don't know either.  He quickly walked back out though- maybe he realized what we were all thinking.

Oh, but now we four patrons have been graced by the presence of an elderly man (almost said "gentleman" but I'm feeling a bit pessimistic at the moment and don't want to assume too much) who has sat down behind me and begun to smoke.  He is in the perfect position to read my writing. . . but I'll gamble on language difference and his inability to decipher my awful handwriting.  Of any of us, he definitely seems like the regular to the train station bar.  I bet he could tell a hundred stories about this place- if only I could speak the language.  What is the language here?  Montenegrin?  I will have been in 11 countries this month so have lost all memory of language names, currencies, borders, etc.   And despite no shared language, I think I prefer my imagination right now.

On the small circular wicker table (the kind with a glass protector over it) my notebook is next to a single 1.5euro Niksicko (lines over both the s and c) 500ml ber bottle, half of the contents of which are poured into a small Coca Cola glass.  It's a fine beer- I won't pretend my palette or beer memory is enough to prescribe more than that single complimentary adjective to it.  I did think about ordering food as well.  I am hungry, have a three hour wait, and an eight hour bus ride after this. . .but from the seven page menu, only two options were available.  So I declined.  I'll find something else soon.  Somewhere.  Though then I'll have to take out more money at the ATM. Decisions. . .

What's nice about traveling is noticing all of these little things and random people.  One gets in a mode of ultra-awareness of difference when going from place to place quickly.  This enables a heightened sense of smell, deeper respect for the beauty of vistas, acknowledgement of people and their jean jackets a bit more.  I think it's because when we're traveling we have the time to.  We are passive.  Taking the passenger seat to life happening around us.  We are in others' lives when we travel.

We of course still find things weird when we travel, but unlike at home we can't dismiss it so easily as such.  Instead, we spend time rationalizing, philosophizing, and hopefully not too quickly believing we "understand" it enough to move onto the next thought.   This makes travel a humbling experience- forcing the journeyer to say "I don't know".  It's a transcendent juxtaposition between this forced lack of understanding and the heightened appreciation of the world's beauty.

This exposure to the unknown (both places and people) is why some travelers love touristy places and others despise them.  Don't you think?  Too much difference can be overwhelming.  Too many travelers are weak.

(side note) The jeaned man just left.  He was carrying a 2 liter soda bottle filled with a clear liquid.  He walks with a limb, has a scruffy face, and hair to his shoulder.  His one friend has a kind of fanny pack hanging from his neck.  The other is carrying a briefcase.  Understand them better now?

I find it funny that places like this bar (I've realized now from a sign on the door that it's called "Aperitiv Bar") were once new!  All shiny and quite possible fashionable- at least by local standards.  Maybe this simple blue carpet, the bar with green opaque-because-of-bubbles glass, or these dark brown wicker table sets were the "hit new thing" once.  Maybe everyone came to Aperitiv Bar- and slowly they have stopped- other than Mr. Jean Outfit, ancient old Mr. Smokes and SitsTooClose (oh I guess he left too), and the occasional random American on his way to an even more bizarre location.  

I wouldn't be surprised if this cigarette-aged bartender woman was being chased by these men some 20 years ago.  They do say that bartenders have the best stories. . . 

Who knows?  I guess I do have 2.5 hours more to figure it out.  Though soon, after a few more gulps of Niksicko (don't forget those lined consonants) I will find another strange location, but with food, and there I will once again try (and likely fail) to make sense of my surroundings.

But (closing thought) isn't the point that through failing to make sense of others we get a new piece of the puzzle to make sense of ourselves?  But do we learn it immediately? If yes, then what have I learned from Mr. Jean Outfit?  No, I think it cooks under the surface for a while first.  But then how are these strange moments while traveling connected?

Do they make us who we are?  Or do they simply show us? 

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Why You Can't Use Phones On Planes: This is a hilarious short skit about how annoying it is to have to turn off electronic devices on planes, and how it really doesn't make much sense to anyone.  I personally almost always just put my phone on silent but keep it on.  As for when I'm reading on a Kindle, I just nod my head yes when the attendant says to put it away and then just make sure s/he doesn't see me continue to read. 

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Overland Trips I Want to Take: Part 3 (West Africa)

This is the third and last edition of Overland Trip I Want To Take- explaining theoretical road trips that I've recently planned out.  The series was inspired by a trip I'm currently planning, but generally I always fantasize about crazy journeys while I have free time.  Hopefully in the next few years I'll take one or more of these and then be able to post about the actual trip!

You can find the other two tours here:

Part 1 (South America)

Part 2 (Eastern Europe)

Western Africa

If I had a choice (and all the money and all the time and guaranteed safety) this is the tour that I would take.  West Africa is one of the few parts of the world left for me to explore and so I'm eager to learn about it, see its people, experience its culture, and visit its sites.  That said, there are a few reasons why I haven't made the trip and why it might be hard to do.  These reasons are: language, safety, and cost/time.

Language: Most countries in West Africa are French + local language speaking.  I don't speak French.  What actually bothers me with French is that I can understand so much of it because I speak (conversationally) Spanish and Italian. So when I hear French I have a natural impulse to listen to try to figure it out. Usually though, I can't, and that is frustrating. This would be easy to overcome by having a French-speaking travel companion.  I'll keep it in mind.

Safety: Though I generally think I travel smart and am thus not too worried about security threats, this is a bit of a volatile part of the world, I don't have too many contacts there, and again, not knowing the language adds another risk.  

Cost / Time:  I put these two together because they're very dependent on one another- the longer you travel, the more it costs.  Traveling overland in West Africa takes a long time because of inefficient roads, lots of borders, and also because cities are so close, the buses stop more often.  The itinerary below would take, I imagine, a couple months.  Furthermore, though food and hotels generally aren't too expensive (7 West African countries are on the list of 20 poorest in the world), there is one big expense: visas.  Each of the 15 countries in the circular tour below require a visa, with an average cost between them at more than $100- it's close to $2000!  Furthermore, these aren't visas on arrival- these are visas where you have to go to an embassy beforehand and apply, have a waiting period, etc.  Because many of these are small and generally poor nations, there aren't many embassies around.  The best process would be to start in one of the bigger nations in the region (i.e Senegal, Ghana, or Nigeria) and apply from there.  

All of this together makes the trip a little bit of a tough sell.  Splitting it up into two or three trips would probably make more sense.  Either way, it would be important to start somewhere for a couple weeks where you could apply for the other visas, have the money and time to endure all the waiting and bureaucracy, and likely have a French speaker.  Because of this, I've cut the itinerary up into three parts (red, yellow, and pink) and added the blue as ways they could, theoretically be combined.

Lagos to Abidjan

This would be the easiest section for me to do as English is widely spoken in both Ghana and Nigeria, most of these countries are rather safe, and the road connections are quite straight-forward.  The trip could start in Lagos, Nigeria- Sub-Saharan Africa's largest and one of the fastest growing cities.  Nigeria, thanks to oil, has been quickly developing in the recent past, and is now seen as one of the main centers for business in Africa.  The route from Lagos to the next locations, the two narrow countries of Togo and Benin, would be quick, only a few hours between each main point all the way to Accra, Ghana. Ghana is the country in West Africa I most want to visit, as I have many friends from high school there and it is famous for its old British colonial forts and a wonderfully preserved jungle.  The final jaunt on this section would be a half day trip from Ghana to the Ivory Coast (or Cote d'Ivoire) and its fascinating capital- Abidjan.  The second largest city in West Africa, Abidjan has an interesting developmental history as it has somewhat shrunk from past economic and political heights in the past 20 or so years. Supposedly it still holds the charm of a once regional center that is trying to fight its way back.

Monrovia to Dakar 

This route would likely be easier (visa wise) starting in Dakar.  Either way, this will be a complicated path as the countries here are more of the unknown and tense ones in the region / world.  Though Liberia and Sierra Leone both being English-speaking may be useful, they both have long and somewhat recent histories of violence.  In many ways this actually makes the nations safer, as disarmament has taken place and people are trying to get over their painful past.  Liberia would be great to see as it was actually founded by freed black slave from the USA and it's capital, Monrovia is named after James Monroe.  Moving up North would be the two Guineas:  Guinea and Guinea-Bissau.  Guinea supposedly has next to no transport infrastructure, so that could a be a harrowing journey trying to navigate through the rather large and diverse nation, but hopefully there would be a way to have some experiences there and then make it to Guinea-Bissau, one of the few Portuguese-speaking countries in Africa (the others being Angola, Mozambique, Sao Tome and Principe, and Cape Verde).  The final stretch would be through the tiny nation of Gambia, another English speaking nation, and then on to Dakar, Senegal.  Along with Accra, Dakar is the city I most want to see in West Africa, one Christmas a Senegalese friend of mine from boarding school came to spend the holidays with my family, she cooked one night and if what she made then was any indication of what I'd eat in Dakar, I'd go just for the food!  Another incentive is that one of my advisors from university works heavily in Senegal and so I'm sure I could talk to some inspiring individuals there.

Nouakchott to Niamey

This part of the trip is really exciting to me because it is through the land that combines French West Africa with the Arab North Africa, though in a much more "untouched" way than people might think of in Morocco, for example.  Being a desert region also remind me of my current home, Abu Dhabi, and so it could be eye-opening to see how others (less gaudy than the Gulfis) live in this harsh terrain.  Though some might find this section crazy because of the three insanely long (24-50hr) bus rides that would be required, anyone who has read this blog for a while knows my strange obsession with long bus rides, especially in Africa.  In fact, the buses might be the highlight of the trip, as much of the things to do in these countries is admire the landscape.  The first bus from Nouakchott, Mauritania to Bamako would be the longest, with stories of 2-3 days including breakdowns. . .  From Bamako, Mali it would be great to go up and visit Timbuktu, but currently rebel factions have a hold of it and travel in the North is not advised- hopefully that would change.  The next two buses, from Bamako to Ouagadougou (pronounced Waa-gaa-doo-goo) and then onward to Niamey, Niger, would entirely cross Burkina Faso- going from the lush Volta region, through to the Arid west.  The final stop, Niamey, is a low lying desert city with a nice river that (along with the mosques) are the main point of interaction.  Though the cities along the way may be less than stellar, I think this section would be full of things to learn and reflect on: the identity of Islam in Africa, political economy of landlocked nations, and lots of introspection on those long rides.

So there you have it!  A crazy tour through West Africa. If anyone wants to fund it (trip cost + salary deduction for missed time), speaks French, and is a good companion- let me know!  

Bonus Trip:  In each of the three parts, I've included a bonus trip that I haven't thought through very much at all, but would still like to take.  Todays bonus is- The Caucuses and Central Asia.  This would be a two part, really requiring a flight in the middle, but a nice jaunt around Azerbaijan, Georgia, and Armenia and then a trip through a few of the stans: Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan (the three most prominently on my list) would be really mind blowing since I hardly know ANYTHING about the culture in any of these locations.

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Overland Trips I Want to Take: Part 2 (Eastern Europe)

In planning a trip through German-speaking Europe that I am hoping to take this December/January, I started thinking about other overland trips that I would like to take in future.  I came up with three really exciting ones and thought I would post the theoretical itineraries here!  

I'm not sure when- but I'll definitely be taking one or more of these trips in the next few years.

I posted about the actual winter Europe trip and the first fantasy trip- in South America, from Buenos Aires to Bogota here:  Overland Trips I Want to Take: Part 1 (South America)

the third trip through West Africa can be found here: Overland Trips I Want To Take: Part 3 (West Africa)

Now onto the second trip

Eastern Europe

This trip would be amazing!  It combines ancient sites, Soviet era architecture, small modern cities, a beautiful coast, low lying mountains and more.  For me it would be unique in that Eastern Europe is really one of the regions that I'm least familiar with- I speak none of the languages, only know the basic outline of political history, and am not aware of much of the culture.  All of this would make it the perfect kind of travel- full of learning and experiencing new things.  

The trip would start in St. Petersburg experiencing the iconic "Mother Russia" before heading west through the three Baltic states (Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania) this fast developing though often forgotten part of Europe interesting combines Eastern and Western Europe with some Northern/Scandinavian flair - or so I gathered from my short weekend in Latvia in 2011.  That brief encounter made me want to see more of the Baltics.

From there the route would go through Belarus and Ukraine. These two large countries were two of the more connected to the core of the USSR and still exist as more reserved (especially Belarus) than other parts of the former Soviet bloc.  These two nations being so large would mean long hours going through country-side, hopefully stopping in small towns, seeing the rural life a bit, making new friends, who knows. 

Next would be moving into the mountains of Moldova and Romania.  Considering I love low lying mountains and hills, I think this would be a highlight! Plus Moldova is probably the most obscure of the countries on the list, so getting to know it a bit would be really exciting.

Once in Bucharest, the plan is to cut directly West through Belgrade and all the way to Zagreb in Croatia and even further to Ljubljana, Slovenia.  These two capital cities are said to be somewhat unknown gems of Europe, with the latter being popular with cyclists and sharing some parts of Italian culture because of its proximity with Northern Italy.

The ride down the Croatian coast of the Adriatic sea will likely be the peak of beautiful landscape on the trip.  At some point though I'd move inland first to visit the campus of the boarding school in Mostar that is part of the United World College movement that I attended.  After crossing through the last bits of coast in Montenegro I'd move inland a second time, through Kosovo to Sophia, Bulgaria.

After Sophia I'll be deep in old Greek territory, visiting Alexander the Great's sites in Montenegro and then through another beautiful capital, Tirana, Albania. I will then leave the "Balkans" proper and head down through Greece to all the ancient ruins on the way to Athens!

Wow! I'm both exhausted and exhilarated from even writing about it!  Definitely would be a whirlwind experience. Hope I will do it (or parts of it) soon!

Bonus Trip: South Pacific  While talking with a friend we came up with three other long trips, and though I haven't put much thought into them, I'm including one in each of the posts as a bonus trip.  This idea is to island hop around the South Pacific- seeing Fiji, Kiribati, Samoa, Marshall Islands, and many more!  I would be done ideally on a boat, though there are lots of small planes that go between the islands as well!  Who knows!

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Overland Trips I Want to Take: Part 1 (South America)

This is Part 1

for part 2 (Eastern Europe) click here

and for part 3 (West Africa) click here

I'm currently planning on going to Europe in December to spend Christmas with my German family.  One of my American friends from boarding school will be around because he is working in Germany for a year but not going home, and so I've invited him to Christmas with my uncle.  Because of the way the holiday, and New Year's Day, falls in the middle of my Sun-Thurs work week, it's very easy to take off the next week as well, and so we're now planning a little jaunt around German speaking Europe.  It's all very tentative, but I've started looking at prices and things to do around and routes to take, and I map the itinerary below:

It's fun because it takes us through every Germany speaking country: Germany, Luxembourg, Switzerland, Liechtenstein, and Austria, and because it is pretty short, with the maximum travel time less than 6 hours.  We would have about nine days to do it- probably the first four going quickly point by point and then a slower five in Austria.  Who knows if it will materialize or how much of it we will do, but it looks like a lot of fun!

In getting excited for this trip, I started thinking of other overland tours I would like to take, looking into whether or not they're possible, and fantasizing about when I could do them, who with, and adding extra fun components like making a documentary of the journey or something.  It all sounds up in the air and like a dream, but I'm sure I will actually do at least one in the next five years.  I always say, "always be dreaming 10 amazing things, then if you only accomplish 1 or 2, you're still being amazing!"  So, I'll add these to my list of amazing ideas and see where they go.  

So without further ado, the trips!

The W(r)est of South America 

This trip would hit all of the things I wanted to do in South America but haven't yet.  It hits three of the four countries on the West of the continent, as well as the rest of the Spanish speaking countries I've yet been to, so I call it the W(r)est trip.  It would start in Buenos Aires where I would see my wonderful Italian relatives that live in the Capital.  I would then head up to the triple border of Argentina-Paraguay-Brazil to see the Iguazu falls, which are the last waterfall on my list of the top 5 (the others being Niagara, Angel, Gullfoss, and Victoria).  I would then head up through Paraguay to Bolivia, stopping to revisit the family of a friend I stayed with in Santa Cruz, the Potosi Salt Flats, and the Mile High city: La Paz.  I'd then head into Peru, spending time admiring the Andes, and of course seeing Machu Picchu near Cusco.  I'd then head up through Ecuador before finishing in Bogota, Colombia!   

The yellow highlighted bits are "optional" thoughts that I would consider depending on time.  The first is to explore Argentine Patagonia, supposedly one of the most beautiful places in the world.  The second is to take a flight to the Galapagos islands (or maybe Easter island?) from Ecuador.  A third one not included on the map would be a quick jaunt over to Suriname and French Guinana- so I could officially say I'd been to every country in South America!

Bonus trip (I haven't put too much thought into but in talking with some friends, thought to include): Southeast Asia- somehow incorporating Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, and maybe Myanmar? 

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Three Beautiful Mosques I Visited In June

It is currently the month of Ramadan for Muslims, and during this time mosques play the call to prayer a bit louder than usual.  I normally get woken up by it in the morning here in Abu Dhabi, and I don't mind- it's a nice reminder to take the time out of the day to say a little "thank you".  

One thing I'm very thankful for is all of the travel I've been able to do in the past few years.  This June, while I was working in Egypt, I took weekend trips to around the Mediterranean and got the chance to see many amazing things.  Something that stands out, both because of their breathtaking beauty, but also because of their ever presence in the region, is mosques.  I've seen dozens and dozens in the past few months- but three stood out: The Blue Mosque and Hagia Sofia in Istanbul, Turkey, and the Hassan II Mosque in Casablanca, Morocco.  I'm also including a photo (not mine- though the others are) of the Grand Mosque in Abu Dhabi, which I see all of the time, but never stops amazing me.

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

40 Maps They Didn't Teach You in School

http://www.boredpanda.com/fun-maps-they-didnt-teach-you-in-school/

Above is a link to a fun group of different maps- some are statistical, others are just for entertainment, and others are a bit questionable, but a really cool collection!   

Here are a few of my favorites:

Favorite Sport by Country

Different Alphabets in the World

Most Widely Consumed Alcoholic Beverage by Country

Countries by which side of the road they drive on

The countries that Britain has never invaded (only 22)

Countries that don't use the metric system

enjoy!!

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

The joy of being at “home”: all of them

  After spending two weeks back in the States, about ten days in Indiana, where I grew up, and a few days in New York, where I went to university,  I’ve gotten the pleasure of working from home (in Abu Dhabi) for a week.  All of this “home” time has made me think about the different locations I’ve been lucky enough to call “home”, the lessons I’ve learned while there, and what I think I will learn, or reflect on, in the future.

  Indiana: 

Family and old friends are forever: Family members are the most different people I will ever feel the exact same as, and the best of old friends will always be connected to you because they will always care.  We live completely separate lives, often times have very separate views, but our foundations are shared.  

Ambiguity: No matter how hard anyone tries, people will always judge one another, whether it is positively or negatively.  But in Indiana my set of cards and how they play out in my life, are almost entirely unknown to everyone.  Most people don’t even know where Abu Dhabi is, what management consultants do, nor would they be able to relate to most aspects of my everyday life (past or present).  This leads both to a disconnect, which can be sad, but also forces them to see me stripped of all those titles and just see me as me- good or bad.   (though yes, I’ll always be a white, male, who grew up well-off, which obviously means a lot)

Indiana = check: Coming into this vacation I thought it would be the last time (at least in long while) that I would spend more than a week in Indiana, and now I’m even more sure that is so. I think the lessons I learned this time around would only repeat themselves- in the future I’ll have grown and maybe need something new to learn from there, but now I feel content- or at least I think there are other things to do.  Separate from this feeling though is my love for my family (who I speak to everyday and will continue to see, though maybe I’ll push more for opportunities to see them other places).  Overall, I get a bit disheartened being there- there is a feeling of little drive and opportunity, and even the people who do have one or both, often steer themselves in directions that I don’t care to learn from (or, as said before, think I could learn more quickly or deeply somewhere else).  

  New York:

You need your best friends: Without even expecting it, most of my best friends from boarding school were all in the city at the same time!  This was amazing for me as most of them I hadn’t seen in two or more years.  It’s so weird that now we’ve known each other for nearly 1/3 of our lives, and it is a wonderful point to meet because we are all finishing school and moving on to incredible adventures.  I can tell these friends everything and anything and I appreciate their input in all aspects of my life and work.  It’s great to not be getting to know people, but just to straight up know them.

The best city in the world: New York is honestly just so special, and I love that I know my way around and feel so comfortable in a place like that. It’s also inspiring to see a place with so many different kinds of people getting along, all being successful, and just the pulse of the place, the innovation, the ideas, the motion- there is no place like it and I’m proud to have experienced it and know I will be back often, maybe even to live, but. . .

I could not live there now:  At this point in my life I could not live in the city.  There are incredible advantages, but the city eats you up.  Especially being a young professional now, I know New York would destroy me.  Speaking of the “cards” above, being in New York is like constantly playing poker.  It’s a strange balance between presenting your cards so people understand you, but being scared to do so because you know they will really just understand you in the terms they want to.  Furthermore, it’s almost disgusting the way people play their cards trying to make others like them- it’s all just not a game I want to play.  But I know I would, If I lived there now, I would sacrifice really developing myself for developing myself in other people’s eyes. 

  Abu Dhabi:

Focusing on me / where I want to be: Picking to live in Abu Dhabi was a bit of social suicide (on a scale of the places I considered for post-grad: from New York being the most social, Dubai in the middle, and Abu Dhabi the least).  But I knew that coming in, and I picked it because I wanted time to focus on me.  I like Abu Dhabi because I do have many friends here, so I can be social when I want, but it isn’t a place where I feel like I must constantly be seeing people.  I’m able to do what is best for me and to become who I want to be- every day I read, pray, work out, dance, play the piano, and (maybe more in the future) write.   I’m growing professionally, intellectually, spiritually, physically, and working on the skills I want to have.  I don’t think that anywhere else I could do all of these things so much and also live so comfortably.  Sure it is really hot, but for the same price as a dinky thing in NYC, I have three balconies and two bathrooms for myself, I can have a handy man, maid, or cab ride for cheaper than almost anywhere, and the luxuries both in the Emriates, and the fact that we are so centrally located for travel- make this an ideal location!  I’m so happy here in Abu Dhabi.

Realizing the downfalls and the limits: Though I’m happy here now, I imagine my needs changing and thus moving, both because of the socio-political environment and because of the impact I want to make on the world.

  Overall, I’m happy for all of the perspective I have gained from the past few weeks of being in my different homes.  It was great to think through the three of them and know how much I have grown and learned from each and to feel confident that I’ve been where I need to be, am where I need to be, and will continue to be for the future!

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Lazys, Do-ers, Get-it-doners

A couple people have pointed out that anytime I skype them while I'm at my home, there is always at least one other person there too.  Unfortunately, this does not mean that I am ever-popular and constantly have friends around, but rather that there is always cleaners, movers, maintenance, hangers, delivery men, laundry boys, guards, etc.  This is because in the UAE, service is inexpensive, and so rather than hanging curtains or fixing lights on my own (and likely messing things up) I hire someone to do it and pay a minimal price.  This is nice in that things get done effectively and quickly- but I realize it is a bit different from the normal growing-up process my peers are going through.  As a consultant- always thinking of organizing things into groups- I came up with these three division of people:

Lazys: the people who are content with having nothing accomplished.  They see a problem and just let it be.  Even if it will lead to dire circumstances, they see it as a slow process of destruction that they do not have to take care of.

Do-ers:  the people who get their hands dirty, see something that needs to be fixed and then learn how to fix it and dive right in.  For them the process of making things right is just as important as the outcome of order.  The only fault of the do-er is that sometimes their actions are not as effective in both time spent and/or quality of the out-come

Get-it-doners: the people who see a problem and find someone else who will have the solution.  It will be accomplished, but not by their own hands, and likely at a cost.  The get-it-doners will have the highest quality solutions (as they will bring in experts) but their dependence on others, causes problems if a solution is needed quickly.

Most twentysomething new adults like myself are either lazys or do-ers, I am somewhat unique in that I live in a place where the means required to be a get-it-doner are low.  Though it will work for these next two years while I'm in the UAE, I'm nervous that being so strongly a get-it-doner will impede my life when I may need to be a do-er. It is also a bit demoralizing in a way to have to rely on others for simple things, and I think that the independence that comes with early adulthood really pushes one to be a do-er.  However, I notice myself often seeing that something needs to get done, feeling like I don't have the time or understanding, and so just asking someone else.

The danger in this is not just reliance, but also entitlement, and one needs to be careful to not think that they are "too good" to be a do-er.  It is these balances that must constantly be considered as an ex-pat in the Gulf.

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

My Happy Place

I was raised in the plains, but my heart lies in the hills.

I spent this past Friday in the Ourika Valley of the Atlas Mountains in Morocco, near Marrakech.  I planned a few days in advance to take the day excursion in the hills and had been looking forward to it - considering that the past three months have meant mainly flat deserts.  But, I was not nearly expecting to be so pleasantly surprised at how wholly lifted I felt upon entering into the valley.

There is something about low-lying brown and green hills that brings me utter calm and joy.  Ever since going to boarding school at the foothills of the Rocky Mountains (which I describe as the most beautiful place I've ever seen), I've always said that I find this scenery breathtaking beyond words.  

This weekend I realized just how deeply the happiness from the hills is ingrained in me.   In the valley I felt instantly at peace- both retrospectively reflecting on the past and optimistically looking towards the future.  It was magnified exponentially when I let my guide walk a good minute ahead of me after we broke away up a private path (you needed a ladder to get to it).  I walked giddily, looking up at the stark blue sky and the rise and fall of the summits, feeling the wind blowing across my loose clothing, listening for birds and the soft crackling of leaves and twigs below my feet.  It was a deep experience of pure being.

Perhaps my love for these surroundings is because I used to take walks through hills like these with my two teenage loves, perhaps it is because I really grew up and came into my own in those Rocky Mountain foothills, maybe they are reminiscent of my independence in one of my first big trips abroad alone in the Andes in Mendoza, Argentina, or telling of the deep reflection and curiosity that overtook me in the hill of Rwanda and Burundi, and maybe it is a memory of the pleasant ease of success after Trail of Seeds' project in Venezuela.  Most probably it is a combination of all of these things- a glorious history of diversely meaningful experiences tied together by a shared landscape.

It's fascinating how a short few hours in the beauty of nature can make one feel lifted for days-  I'm deeply thankful and look forward to the next time the hills elevate me again.

[youngglobalcitizen-blog]

Keeping Fresh and Pessimistic

***Disclaimer- to anyone who might be slightly annoyed at a 22 year old saying they feel old. . . this is not for you***  Similarly, if you like structure- this is a very stream of consciousness free flowing post.***

Upon jumping into the "real world" of having a job, a home, and money in the bank- I've weirdly felt angsty.  Evener weirder is the fact that I'm mainly angsty about there being nothing to be angsty about- everything just seemed a bit too put-together.

Through the ambiguity of these feeling I have deciphered that they've been about growing up and feeling a bit too mature for my age, but it wasn't until becoming obsessed with an MTV teen dram/com that I figured out exactly what this feeling was about: freshness and pessimism.  

During the past 4 or 5 days, I've watched all 31 aired episodes of "Awkward." It is a show about a high school- friendships, love, popularity, parents, and more.  It is the perfect encapsulation of the emotions a lot of kids go through between 15 and 18, and it felt very real.  Over the course of my forcibly short (I now have to wait for new episodes to air) but intense obsession, I realized something beautiful about that time in life- the wonderful and dynamic late-teens- and how I miss it- the freshness of everything and the pessimism that this freshness brings.

In the late teens, so many new things are happening on a much more intense and personal scale: falling in love, developing deeper friendships, new relationships with parents, and thinking of the future but having nothing to judge it by.  It is all fresh and exciting and we don't know how to deal with it and it feels so important because it has never happened before.  Everything is life changing because the late teens are really when life is beginning.  

And because everything is new, everything feels unique. . . and lasting. But when we see that all of it actually isn't, then the pessimism comes. We haven't known anything else and so when the breakup comes, or graduation, or moving or anything else - we feel as if the world is ending, life will never be the same, and we will NOT be okay.  Just as the joy of newness had overtaken us so recently, the burn of loss does too.

But the truth is (and in the late teens we are told this constantly but never believe it, and any teen reading this now will not believe it either)- the truth is it will all be okay.  Another love, another school, another friendship will happen and fill our time and our thoughts and our hearts. A sad month will be just a month in a pool of many and similarly a happy day will be part of a mental collage that makes us smile.

Of course, it doesn't erase what was before or what was first, and the feeling of that newness will never be forgotten- it will be looked back on as magical- so encompassing and wonderful and frightening, but most of all- fleeting. 

Life is like a puzzle- each person, place, and experience that we encounter is a piece.  Some grow in size or hold an ever-important place, and others shrink to obscurity as more are added.  The hard part is when you feel like you can't control that shrinking, when without knowing you lose the connection to what used to be so important and when you can't feel the same joys in the same way.

I think my angst is because new things are happening and things are changing. . . and I don't really care.  It feels normal.  My life has been change for so long.  I'm not phased.  And though I'm excited- I'm not amazed.

A new city is a new city, a new friend is a new friend, a new fact is a new fact- it is all exciting and I'm learning and I'm growing and I feel my future becoming increasingly meaningful and important, but it isn't the same all-encompassing joy or fear like that of the late teens.  But it is a new feeling, and I'm eager to explore this feeling as well.  There is something pleasant about knowing the wounds will heal, that people will stay in touch, and that life does go on.

That's the important part of this post- it isn't emo, or trying to say that the late teens are the most important part of one's life (how could a 22 year old make that statement anyway) but what I've realized is how special that time is.  How treasured the freshness and the pessimism should be kept.

All moments in life need to be appreciated, and often it is easiest to do that in retrospect.  I'm not sure what is best though- is it nicer to be swept away in the moment and only realize how astonishing it is later?  Does reflecting in the "now" take away from the now- or complement it?  

. . . If there is a show that answers that, let me know.