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vbecker10 · 2 months

Note

If you still do requests, I was wondering if you could write a fan fiction of Loki and Y\N where Y\N has Fibromyalgia and she's having a pain flare up? Would really make my day if you could!

Everything Hurts

Pairing: Loki x female reader (Y/N) - reader has Fibromyalgia

Summary: You have worked with the two Asgardian princes as their press coordinator since they both officially joined the Avengers. You enjoy the job greatly and love working with Thor but Loki tests your friendship and patience every single day. The God of Mischief alternates between being charming, sweet and flirtatious and being a sarcastic, pain in the butt who makes every meeting, email or interview request a battle. The day before an important event, you open up to Loki about your fibromyalgia and he offers to use his powers to alleviate your pain.

Background Info: Female reader has Fibromyalgia with the following symptoms - whole body fatigue, feeling drained of energy suddenly, inability to sleep deeply, feeling tired and worn out even after sleeping, tension headaches, muscle & joint pain (throbbing; aching; burning; shooting; stabbing; stiffness; soreness), muscle spasms, tender points at the tops of her shoulders and knees (light touch in these areas causes pain and discomfort), these symptoms worsen at night

Warnings: very brief mention of an ex-boyfriend who broke up with you because of your diagnosis, feeling like a burden, hiding your pain

A/N: Thank you so much for sending in this request! I did a bunch of research into this (mostly on Google) but please let me know if I messed anything up and I will fix it. I want to be as accurate as possible. I hope you all enjoy it! 💚

(sorry if this is bit of a long one, I wanted to cover a lot of stuff and I didn't really want to make it two parts) 💜

Monday

"Thor, I assume you're taking Jane as your plus one to the charity gala Friday night, right?" you ask the older prince, looking up slowly from your computer screen. The stiffness in your neck makes the simple action increasingly more difficult each time you do it.

"Yes, of course," he answers with his signature smile.

"Awesome," you nod, feeling a twinge of pain at the base of your neck.

Your hand moves to the back of your neck and you begin to rub it gently, trying to alleviate some of the tightness in your muscles. When you look up at Loki, you notice his eyes are focused on you and for a brief moment you think you see concern in his expression.

Your eyes meet and his smirk emerges, "Would you like a massage, darling?"

"No," you tell him, putting your hand down quickly although a massage is probably exactly what your sore muscles need. "And stop calling me that, I told you it's unprofessional," you roll your eyes but are unable to hide the smile that always slips free when he calls you pet names.

"Very well, love," he responds and you bite back a sarcastic comment.

"Do you know who you're bringing, Loki?" you decide to change the subject back to the original point of your meeting with the brothers.

"I think we should attend the event together," the God of Mischief says with a wink.

You sigh and rub your temples, resting your elbows on your desk as you feel a tension headache emerging. "Loki, for once could you please just answer me seriously? I don't have all day for this," you easily make it seem as if the cause of your headache is the younger prince and not a symptom of your exhaustion. You had gotten almost seven hours of sleep last night but your fibromyalgia prevented you from falling into a deep sleep so you woke feeling worn out and drained this morning.

"What if I am being serious?" Loki asks, his tone still playful but his smirk has shifted into a more sincere smile.

"Brother, just tell Y/N you will be attending the charity gala alone," Thor thankfully steps in before you can even begin to consider Loki's suggestion. "As you always do," the older Asgardian makes a jab at his brother's lack of a date to any of the events you had organized for them to attend in the last three months.

You let out a short laugh but don't miss the angry glare Loki casts towards his brother. He looks at you again, "You can note that I will be attending with a plus one."

"Great," you say, forcing a smile. The thought of Loki taking someone suddenly makes you feel jealous but you don't want to think about why that is the emotion that surfaced first. Your tension headache suddenly becomes much worse and the stiffness in your neck spreads down your back. You need to finish this meeting as soon as possible so you can get the two Asgardians out of your office before you are unable to hide your worsening symptoms.

"Who's the unlucky lady?" Thor asks, laughing loudly at his own joke.

"Is her name necessary?" Loki asks you in response to Thor's question.

"Umm... no, I guess I can just leave that part blank for now," you answer. Your hand moves back to your neck again, trying to relieve the ache from your muscles feeling so tight.

Loki nods, folding his arms across his chest. "Please do that then," he says. "Unless you would like to change your mind?" he adds with a smirk.

Before you can reply to him you feel a sharp stab of pain in your abdomen and look down to hide when you wince. You take a slow breath but a second sharp stab of pain in the same location causes you to breath out harshly.

"Y/N?" Loki asks, his words pulling your attention back to him. This time there is no mistaking the look of concern on his face as he leans forward in his chair.

"Brother," Thor shakes his head, "It would seem you've upset Y/N with your suggestion, she looks as if it physically pains her."

"Would you for once just be quiet?" Loki looks over at Thor then turns to face you. "Are you alright?" he asks, ignoring the fact that his brother cannot see that your pain is clearly very real.

"I'm fine," you insist even though you know Loki will easily see through your lie. No one at SHIELD or Stark Industries knows about your fibromyalgia and you plan on keeping it that way for as long as you possibly can. You decide instead of trying to convince him you are okay, you will need to prove that you are busy. "I think we're done here. I've got everything I need," you tell the two brothers.

"Are you sure?" Loki asks.

You push yourself up from your chair which was not a good idea, you feel a sudden wave of exhaustion through your entire body but you fight to remain standing. Thor stands in response to your movement but Loki remains seated, not willing to leave until he knows why you are lying. "I have another meeting in ten minutes and I need to prep for it," you tell them. Loki finally stands slowly but you can feel his eyes watching you so you do your best to continue hiding your pain. Flashing your best 'I'm completely fine smile' you say, "I'll email you if I have any other questions."

"Thank you as always, Y/N," Thor nods and turns to leave.

Loki stays in front of his chair for a moment. You can see he is thinking but he lowers his head and turns to leave without a word.

Tuesday

You skim through the dozen or so requests you have for interviews before you find the one you need just in time for Loki to knock on your office door. He steps inside, "I believe you summoned me."

You laugh, "You make it sound like you're a genie."

He smirks, "I will grant you three wishes if you-"

"No," you cut him off quickly, holding up your hand to silence him, "I'm not rubbing any part of you."

He chuckles as he sits across from you, "Darling, I had no idea you had such a dirty mind but I do like it. I was merely going to say, I will grant you your wishes, all you need to do is ask."

You blush, feeling both embarrassed and stupid, momentarily forgetting why you asked him to come see you.

"I'm glad to see you are feeling better today," Loki says genuinely.

You nod with a smile although you don't in fact feel better, you are just having an easier time hiding you pain today. You slept deeper last night so you feel more rested but the muscles in your lower back are throbbing. "Thanks, me too," you reply and he smiles warmly.

"What was it you needed from me?" he asks.

"Right," you nod and check your email. "Ah," you quickly find what you need, "I got an email from the Daily Bugle, they want to do an interview with you about-"

"I would rather not," he doesn't allow you to finish.

"Loki," you frown, "You really should do this. You haven't done a single one this month. Thor has already done two by himself and a third one with Jane."

"You know I dislike interviews," he reminds you although he doesn't need to. You are well aware of how much Loki values his privacy.

"I know but you need to," you plead with him for the hundredth time since you began working together. You shift in your chair, the throbbing in your lower back spreading higher and becoming more intense.

"Did they inform you about the type of questions they will ask?" he sighs, running his fingers through his hair.

"Yeah," you bite your lip knowing Loki is going to be annoyed, not with you but with the line of questions. "It's a personal interest story, so they wanna know more about you. Here, I'll ask you a few and see what you think?" He nods and you start with one of the first questions, "When you are not on a mission or training, how do you enjoy spending your free time?"

"I greatly enjoy aggravating Thor in my very limited spare time," he smirks.

"See, that's not a good answer. Everyone already knows you like to annoy your brother," you laugh and shake your head.

"I am also quite fond of spending time with my press coordinator," he adds with a softer smile.

"Spending time making my job more difficult," you correct him with an exaggerated sigh. "Okay, what's something you like about earth?"

"Not a single thing comes to mind," he laughs, seeming more comfortable. "Except for you of course."

You roll your eyes, "This will be the worst interview ever if I'm your answer to every question." He smiles but you sigh, knowing the last few questions in the email are the ones he will be most resistant to answering. "They also want to know more about your love life... you've never been seen out with anyone so they are asking-"

His smiles vanishes and he sits up straight in the chair, "No."

"Loki, you have to give them something," you tell him as the muscles in your back tense and tighten. "Even if you just say something like, 'I am not looking for a partner at the moment, I am focusing on my training and blah blah blah."

"I still do not see why it is any of the world's business what I chose to do or not do in my private life," he says, "Especially when it comes to my dating habits."

"Because you don't get to have a private life," you tell him honestly without trying to be harsh. "That's just how it works here, unfortunately. You need to understand, my whole job is to help your public image and make sure people feel like they can trust you. To do that, they have to know you at least a little. You're a prince and a god from a realm that up until a few months ago we all thought was a myth. All anyone knows is that you came here to take over our world before changing your mind and protecting us with your brother."

The tightness in your back loosens and you breath a small, hopefully unnoticeable sigh of relief. You remain perfectly still, fearful that if you stretch or twist your back the wrong way now, the muscles will tighten even worse than before. "I trust you Loki but they don't know you like I do."

His clenched jaw relaxes and he nods, understanding your point although you know he still dislikes this arrangement.

"Just give them a small look into your life, that's all I ask. I can go back to the Daily Bugle and see if they will take out the questions about your romantic life but I really need you to do this. I'm still trying to rebuild your image after... well you know what happened," you shrug.

He nods, knowing you are referring to the Battle of New York and his forced attempt to conquer the planet. You can see his resolve softening so you press him just a bit further, hoping he will finally cave. "Please," you give him your best smile and you see the corner of his lip turn up.

He sighs and shakes his head to chase away the smile that was forming. "I will do the interview but only if they remove any questions referring to my dating life," he agrees and you feel a sense of victory. He gets up, assuming the conversation is now over.

"I will," you assure him and stay seated. "You know it'll only make them more curious right? People want to know why someone like you is single-"

Before you can finish your thought, your back spasms and you groan in pain as the muscles twist and contract. The tightness forces you to lean forward, unable to sit up right until it passes. Your hands grip the edge of the desk and you look down, trying to take a deep, steady breath to relax your muscles.

"Y/N, what is wrong?" Loki asks, his voice thick with worry. He comes around your desk but is clearly unsure about what he should do to help you.

"Just a muscle spasm," you tell him, trying to make it sound less painful than it is. "I slept weird last night, it's not a big deal."

"Are you sure?" he asks, obviously unconvinced. "Can I do anything to help?"

"No, I'm fine. I just need to rest a little," you force a smile, moving to look up at him but the spasm keeps you from moving your back the way you need to. "What I really need is a new bed," you joke but neither of you laughs. "Really, I'm fine, I promise," you insist and he nods slowly.

"You would tell me if you weren't?" he asks in a serious tone.

"Yeah," you want to nod but think better of it.

"Please go see Dr. Palmer if this does not resolve itself," he encourages you. Before you argue that you are fine he adds, "I cannot have the only person in this realm I can stand to be around falling apart."

You laugh at Loki's favorite way to refer to you but the movement causes your spasm to worsen and the muscles to tighten further. You grimace, gripping the edge of the desk tighter and Loki's smile vanishes. "I'm okay," you tell him, "But I really need to just relax and the muscles will loosen up. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

He nods, sensing it is useless to continue discussing the matter and leaves your office.

Wednesday

"Stupid childproof caps," you mumble angrily as you struggle to twist open the cap on your pain medication. The joints in your elbow ache deeply and the muscles in your forearms burn as you continue your fight with the small plastic bottle.

"Do you need help, darling?" Loki asks from behind you. You drop the pill bottle when he startles you, turning quickly to face him. He picks up the bottle as it rolls towards him.

"Yeah, do you mind? I can usually get it," you tell him. "It's just a pain killer for my headache," you lie easily knowing Loki is aware of how frequently you get tension headaches.

He nods, opening the bottle and moves closer to hand it back to you. You reach for the bottle but you feel a sharp stab of pain in your elbow when you extend your arm and pull back quickly. Before he can ask you add a second lie, "I slept on my arm last night. Still need a new mattress."

"I don't understand why you insist on lying to me," he says, placing the bottle in your hand and the cap on the counter.

You ignore his question, taking your pain medication and following it with a large gulp of water. "Do you have a name I can add to the RSVP yet? They emailed me back saying they would like to be able to have it for when you walk the red carpet," you ask him.

"No," he answers.

"Are you keeping her a secret for a reason?" you ask when he walks past you to the coffee maker. "Does she work here? Do I know her? Ooh... is she famous?" You ask lightheartedly but when Loki doesn't respond you have your answer. "You didn't ask anyone?"

"I simply haven't found the time to aquire a date," he confirms without turning to face you.

"Why not? There's gotta be hundreds of women in this city who would love to go with you," you say a bit too honestly.

He looks over his shoulder at you, "I asked one woman but she refused my invitation and I have not been in a hurry to be turned down again."

You look at him confused and then realize he means you. "Loki, you weren't serious about that," you tell him.

He turns completely to face you, "If you thought I was serious, would you have said yes?"

"I-" you freeze, unsure how to answer his question. You had only dated one person after you received your diagnosis and it was too complicated for him to deal with. You hadn't even considered dating anyone since. The prince takes your long silence as a no to his question and nods his head once before returning to making his coffee.

"Loki, it's not-" you try to find the words to explain your reasoning but he shrugs as if he doesn't want to hear it.

Without looking at you he says, "I hope your headache goes away." He picks up his coffee and leaves the kitchen, you make no attempt to stop him even though you want to.

Thursday

You close your eyes and rest your head on the desk, feeling utterly drained of energy both emotionally and physically. Last night your back and neck ached so deeply there was nothing you could do to get comfortable. You had tried every possible position in your bed, then you moved to the couch and finally ended up falling asleep in an arm chair. One hour of uninterrupted sleep was nowhere near enough to get you through today.

"Y/N?" you hear a voice call for you faintly but you are so close to sleeping, you can't help but ignore it.

Loki's hand gently settles on your shoulder causing you to cry out in pain as a stabbing sensation quickly moves through your muscles. The prince has accidentally touched what your doctor calls a 'tender point'. You recoil from his well meaning touch, fully awake from the jolt of pain.

"I'm so sorry," he apologizes, backing away from you. "I didn't mean to hurt you. Are you okay?"

You sit up and attempt to tell Loki you are fine but the movement causes a wave of sharp pain through your lower back. Loki kneels next to you, putting his hand on the arm of the chair, clearly afraid to touch you again. "Y/N, please do not tell me you are fine," he urges gently. "What's wrong, darling? How can I help?"

You look at him, the concern on his face finally eats away at your determination to keep lying. "Everything hurts, Loki," you acknowledge the truth. "I'm having a fibromyalgia flare up. I'm in so much pain and I'm just too exhausted to fight through it anymore."

"I don't know what that is," he responds.

"Right," you mumble. The handful of family members and friends you had opened up to barely knew anything about your condition so it makes sense an Asgardian would never have heard of it.

"Talk to me, please," he says in a softer tone than you've ever heard him use. "I cannot help if I do not know what you need from me."

"There isn't a whole lot you can do," you tell him realistically. He frowns in response and you decide to tell him everything. You take a deep breath and begin, "Fibromyalgia is a disorder which basically means I have widespread musculoskeletal pain. There's this constant dull ache or throbbing, deep in my muscles and joints but that's easier to hide than the sharp, stabbing or burning feelings I sometimes get. You've seen the tension headaches and muscles spasms as well this week." Loki nods slowly but says nothing and you continue, "It also affects my ability to sleep and sometimes my mood or memory but lately they have been okay."

When you finish you give Loki a practiced smile but he doesn't smile in return. He reaches out to cup your cheek but pauses and pulls his hand away. "You can do that," you tell him, wanting to feel Loki comfort you. "I have something called 'tender points' on my shoulders and a few other places. They cause me pain when people touch them, even gently but my cheek is okay."

He places his hand softly on your cheek and looks into your eyes, "I am sorry you have this horrid disorder. I had no idea this is what you have been hiding all this time. You do not deserve to live in pain this way."

"Thanks," you say with a slight shrug.

"There is no cure for this condition?" Loki asks curiously.

You shake your head, "No, but I can manage my symptoms most of the time. I take medication for the pain and to help me sleep. I also go to physical therapy after work a few days a week but that's pretty much all I can do right now."

Loki nods his head as he thinks, his fingers falling gently from your cheek. "There may be something I can do," he offers and you smile, feeling the smallest glimmer of hope.

"Really?" you ask him.

"I do not want to see you suffer," he says.

"Cause I'm your favorite person on the planet, right?" you joke, hoping to get him to smile.

It works, he smiles but his response is not what you expected, "Of course you are, darling."

"Wait, seriously?" you can't help but ask.

"I don't understand your surprise," he chuckles. "I have told you that on numerous occasions."

"Well yeah... but I always thought you were joking or just... I didn't think you meant it. I figured it was just something you said," you tell him, still trying to wrap your mind around his answer.

"There are quite a few things I have told you that you never took seriously," he says and although he is still smiling, he sounds disappointed.

Before you can say anything in response, you feel a burning sensation in your lower back that moves up your spine to your shoulders. You twist uncomfortably in the chair and gasp in pain, reaching for Loki and he moves closer to take your hand. The instant his fingers close around your hand, the pain vanishes. You look down at both of your hands which are now surrounded by the bright green glow of his seidr.

"Is this helping?" he asks and you nod slowly, almost unable to believe what is happening.

"The pain is gone," you say with a small laugh. "How did you do that?"

"My magic can be used for a great many things," he tells you, "I can prevent you from feeling pain but this method is temporary, it will only work so long as I am touching you."

"I don't think I can thank you enough for this, even if its just for a little while," you tell him with a wide smile.

"I will review my spell books to search for a more permanent solution, darling," he promises.

"Again with calling me darling?" you ask without thinking.

"I can stop," his smile fades.

"No," to shake your head and squeeze his hand gently, regretting that you mentioned it. "I like it but it's a bit..." you bite your lip, trying to think of the right word. "Romantic?"

He chuckles, "Has anyone ever told you that you are not very good at picking up on hints?"

"No?" you say and look at him confused.

Loki gets up from where he had been kneeling on the floor next to your chair, his hand still holding yours. He waves his free hand towards the chair on the other side of your desk and it transforms into a black leather couch with a couple of soft, dark green pillows.

"This may be more comfortable than your desk chair," he says, motioning towards the couch and you agree. Loki sits on one end and you sit next to him, your knees barely touching. He lets go of your hand for a moment then places his arm around your shoulder carefully. His fingers glow green, alleviating your pain through the continued contact.

You can't help but lean towards Loki, shifting closerto eliminate any space between you. "Wait, what were you saying about me and hints?" you go back to his previous comment.

He sighs, "Y/N, I like you."

"I know, you said I was your favorite-" you stop talking as your sleep deprived brain finally seems to catch up to Loki. "You like me?"

He laughs, "You do need more sleep. I thought I had been too subtle last month but even Stark and the Captain have noticed I've become fond of you."

"I thought you were just flirting with me cause that was your personality," you admit.

"Oh," his tone loses some of its playfulness. "So you had noticed?"

"Well... yeah but like I said, I didn't think you were serious about any of it," you shrug and look down at your hands in your lap. "I can't imagine why you would flirt with me and mean it."

"Why wouldn't I be interested in you?" he asks, cupping your cheek gently as he lifts you head so you are looking at him. "You are beautiful, funny, clever and you always do what you think is best for me even when I make everything difficult for you."

You giggle and blush at his complements but your smile fades. "What are you thinking about?" he asks, noticing your attitude shift.

"I like you Loki," you tell him, surprising both of you with your honesty.

"You do not look happy about it though," he says.

"I want to be," you tell him but you can't force a smile.

"But you aren't?" he asks.

"I really do like you but this isn't a good idea. You'll regret being with me," you shake your head.

"How can you say that?" he asks, taking your hand.

"I started seeing someone about a year after I was diagnosed and he couldn't handle my symptoms," you explain. "There were days were my tender points were so sensitive that I couldn't bare for him to touch me. I rarely slept through the night so he didn't like sharing a bed with me. If I was too tired to go out with him or our friends, he would get upset or end up going without me," you continue to look down as you talk and the feelings resurface. "It was hard for him to deal when I was having a flare up. One day he just... I don't know, I guess he didn't feel like being weighed down by me so he broke up with me. I haven't thought about dating anyone since."

"I really love working with you, even when you annoy me on purpose," you look up and his lip curls into a small smile. "If we date, you'll end up having to help me on my really bad days or put up with my symptoms keeping me from doing things. I don't want you to resent me for being a burden."

Loki is quite for a moment then says, "If that was how he reacted to you when you needed him, he never deserved you." You look up at Loki and his fingers move slowly up and down your arm. "Your disorder is not a burden for your partner to 'put up with'. It is only a small part of what makes you who you are and, Y/N, you are extraordinary. You are so much stronger than I had ever realized but you do not need to suffer through this alone any longer. Whether you decide you to let me take you on a date or not, I want you to know I will help you with this in any way I can."

You smile at Loki, knowing the prince means every word. You lean towards him, placing a soft kiss on his cheek. Giggling nervously, you watch the smile spread across Loki's lips.

"I am not sure if that was a yes or no to my question but-" he says but before he can finish his thought, you press your lips to his and pull away quickly. Loki's fingers move to the back of your neck in an instant and he brings your lips back to his. He chuckles when you break the kiss, running his thumb gently across your lower lip, "I will take that as a yes."

You smile, "Yes, I would love to go on a date with you."

"How about tomorrow?" he asks hopefully.

You nod then shake your head quickly, "No tomorrow is the charity gala. You have to go to that, I spent so much time putting together the press information-"

Loki kisses you, silencing your worries and when he pulls away again he smiles. "How many times must I ask you to go to the charity gala with me?" he asks.

Friday

"How are you feeling?" Loki asks as you wait to get out of the town car.

"Honestly?" you ask, smoothing out the fabric on your long purple gown.

Loki holds your hand as you walk together towards the beginning of the long red carpet. "You look exquisite, darling," Loki whispers to you. You blush and giggle in response then reach up and kiss his cheek. Numerous cameras flash and dozens of reporters become louder, trying to get both of you to stop for questions.

"No, lie to me," he chuckles and rolls his eyes.

You shake your head and laugh but answer him truthfully, "Your magic is still working perfectly. I'm not in any pain at all. I feel amazing Loki."

You can barely believe the words coming out of your mouth. Loki had stayed up almost all of last night digging through piles of spell books until he finally found what he needed. He enchanted a small pendant with his magic and so long as you wore it, your pain was gone. Your fingers trace the small silver butterfly you wear on a thin chain around your neck and you smile at Loki.

He kisses the top of your head, "I need you to tell me if your symptoms come back. I never want you to hide this from me again."

"I will tell you," you promise just as the door opens.

"Loki! Loki! Over here!" The reporters yell over each other for Loki's attention as the cameras continue to flash brightly all around you. "Who is your date tonight? Loki!"

Half way down the red carpet, Loki pauses in front of the swarm of reporters. The prince kisses the back of your hand then let's go, placing his hand on your waist to pull you closer to him.

"This absolutely stunning woman is Y/N Y/L/N," he introduces you and you look up at him ignoring the cameras. "She is my talented, patient and brilliant press coordinator," he pauses, his eyes still on yours and says, "And she is my girlfriend."

Your heart beats faster and you giggle excitedly, you had no idea Loki was going to declare you his girlfriend in front of the press but you couldn't be happier. He leans down and kisses your lips, the camera flashes intensify. He takes your hand again and leads you away from the reporters and into the gala entrance.

"I'm going to have a thousand emails and calls about this," you laugh as you hear the press call for you and Loki to come back.

"That is a problem for Monday," he says. "This weekend you are mine."

I hope you liked this!! Please like, share and comment if you did 💚💚 Please let me know if you want to be added to my taglist!

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