#freaky elves and half-elves

[rainfeather13]

I see your eldritch Elrond head cannons, and I raise you: Elrond stealing the features of people he likes (his first victim; Maglor’s moles)

[neuvilette-tea-party]

✶The shine of the Crown

Yandere! Elf Prince x Unlucky survivor F!reader — MDNI! TW: Fantasy setting, elf!yandere, power imbalance, royalty and servant, explicit torture, murder, one sided affection, non con, cunnilingus, fingering, P in V, breeding kink, forced creampie (multiple)

Everything is perfect. 

He planned absolutely everything for you, you’re the only one missing now. 

Prince Aodh takes a look around his large quarters in the Palace. He measures his chances. He truly does. He knows meeting his one and only is something that only happens to the most lucky, so many people live and die without ever meeting their true other half. So, for Him to have had the chance to meet you, He considers himself extremely lucky! 

And soon, He intends to honor you like you deserve to be. 

Prince Aodh ordered a lot of new pillows everywhere to create nests for you to lie down and relax. 

He will lay you down in all of them and take you tenderly all night long. 

He added a lot of new surfaces in his quarters. If you're freaky enough, He will gladly take you on them too. Anything to amuse you. 

He is quite excited and a bit nervous, actually. This is his first rut with a partner. Nobody in his kingdom ever caught his eye, not even his betrothed, so he took his brother’s remedy to suppress his rut all his life to keep them at bay. He got through life watching couples flourishing and getting at it passionately when the rut came. To him, it was always more of an annoyance and disturbance in his work. Try to keep an army focused when their instincts are screaming at them to take their partners to bed! A real challenge. Thanks to the Forest God, the Crown passed an edict forcing each general and minister to take suppressants, now calm and peace came back in the ranks, and he could speak to level-headed adults and not toddlers in armor consistently on the verge of implosion. Honestly, this aspect of the Elven species is such a burden! What a shame to be reduced to a rabid animal when you are civilized like them! For those reasons, he always hated that part of himself, what a relief he felt when his twin brother offered him that burgundy remedy to calm down his ardors when He developed his first pulsions. The sensation of freshness and renewed control he felt when he gulped down that mixture for the first time… Truly a blessing! 

If there is something He absolutely despises, it’s the loss of control. 

Prince Aodh knew of the pleasure of the flesh, but he never met someone worth enduring the rut with! Not even his betrothed.  

But then,  

He met you. 

Perfect you. 

Adorable you. 

How could He have predicted you? So far away from your people and civilization, in an empire of elves, how could He have predicted meeting his perfect match? The first time he saw you, lost and wounded in the black forest, He knew. He knew God created you for him and him only. You were dirty and bleeding, disheveled and starving, on the verge of death in your torn clothes. 

A frail, lost human woman... 

Did he find you beautiful?  

No idea.  

You just immediately caught his eyes, like a firefly is tempted by light He was drawn to you by a force beyond his understanding. He stopped his horse, completely ditching his twin brother, who kept hunting ahead of him, and got down to greet you, fearing you were just a mirage of his imagination. 

You lost consciousness right in front of him. The Prince just had the time to catch you before you hit the ground. He lifted your limp body up and carried you on his noble steed right back to the Secret Palace, a place so sacred no uninvited human could ever come across it.  

He ordered his physicians to immediately take you in charge and look over you every hour of the day and night, no matter if they were exhausted! The idea of seeing you die was unthinkable to him! 

You were only a meager human, so why was he acting so erratic at the idea of your death? Others, and he wondered. 

He only had to watch over you at night, listen to your feeble breath, and feel your fragile hands squeeze his large hand in a survival reflex for him to know. 

His 

You were his. 

And he were yours. 

You were mates, destined by the Gods. 

Your pheromones make his head spin so deliciously, He only has to dive his nose in the crook of your neck to get high off your scent, delectable vertigos seizing him like he was flying high in the sky. 

He felt like He was struck by lightning when He first heard your chuckle at one of his dry-humored responses to a fool of an apothecary in charge of healing you, and that was the sweetest sound He ever heard in his life! 

Sweeter even than the songs of the She-elves sung under the moonlight for the celebration of the Light. And you are so intelligent… He has the greatest pleasure discussing with you about everything! 

He already fantasized about inviting you into his Tactical room to strategize together. Or just have you sit cutely on his large lap while he orders his generals... 

The Crown would never allow it... For now 

He would find a way to make it bend the knee. 

Prince Aodh also has to deal with his betrothed asking why he is worrying about a meager human life. They were supposed to wed soon, and he was spending more time with you than preparing himself for her. He had to suppress a growl.  

He never had any interest in her as a future partner or even just a friend. Why would he? It is a purely political marriage; he just has to ensure she gets pregnant, and his job will be done. He has no intention to waste more energy than necessary with her. 

She never understood him, she won’t start now. He can give her a baby to keep her occupied, and run back to your embrace and love you as it pleases him. 

But before dealing with his unsufferable fiance, he had more pressing problems 

Right after leaving the infirmary, you started to make heart eyes at one of his lieutenants! 

And apparently He was not the only elf with scandalous taste around here because his lieutenant was flirting back... 

That fool had no education or class, why were you making doe eyes at him in the first place?  

How? 

Why? 

He could not tolerate it, He felt love for the very first time. He was not going to let you fly away from him that easily, especially for a mere elf such as him! 

So He started to take action. He kept his Lieutenant constantly away from the Secret Palace, giving him dangerous missions after dangerous missions, hoping he would get killed. 

But the cockroach always came back! 

When it was clear you were healed, the Crown asked you to return to your human lands and never come back. The Prince proposed to keep you here and teach you the Elven ways and language to send you back as a messenger and a diplomat between the two races! 

Humans and Elves’ diplomatic ties were now so tenuous now the two former allies were growing more and more hostile towards each other century by century until the former glory days of the Alliance would be no more than forgotten legends in the minds of men, and War broke out.  

Sending an envoy to your people could change the course of History. 

And he could keep you at his side. 

The Crown abided by his whims after long and numerous arguments between them. 

You were not exactly comfortable here, but living among the Elves is a privilege and an honor! And despite the little sparkle of fear in your eyes, He could see you were excited by the adventure. He gave you teachers and a servant to ease your everyday life and ‘hired’ you as his aide, keeping you close to him every day. 

Like a dream... 

And a away from that damn Lieutenant! 

He kept giving you conflicting agendas to make it hard for you to see each other. He made sure to humiliate his rival as much as possible with a stern expression and impossible questions when you three met, hoping your opinion about his rival would get tarnished, slowly but surely, for you to lose interest and distance yourself from him. 

During that time, He worked to place himself in your life as a friend, a comforting presence, and a shoulder to put your head on. He let you see parts of him he never revealed to anybody, not even His brother. You spent so many sleepless nights chatting together in his office around a glass of wine, he truly felt your relationship growing more intimate and purposeful. You had full access to his office for you to take care of his baby phoenix together, you who learned to love it so much! He kept showering you with privileges and special moments with him. 

Privileges he never even gave to his fiancée. 

He chuckles, thinking back about them! He thought he was in love with them back then, but clearly he did not know anything about love. 

He loves you now, and this is the purest thing he has ever felt through the long centuries of his life. 

And he thinks... NO, he is SURE you feel the same toward him! 

How would it be any different? He is an elven Prince after all! You should feel honored that He even laid his eyes on you once! 

And he wants so much more than just to lay his eyes on you! 

Everything was slowly falling into place, as the Prince wished. 

Or so he thought. 

One night, leaving his office, he wanted to stroll in the rose garden and pick a flower for you to discover on your pillow when you woke up. You lock your bedroom like any sane woman would, but you are not as sane as you imagine if you think a lock can keep him away from you! 

He saw you two 

Embrassing each other 

Kissing each other 

Exchanging sweet words discreetly 

That wretched peasant...! 

You were clearly under a curse or a spell! Why else would you still have an interest in that poor fool either way? Elf magic is powerful, and human minds are weak; it would not take much for you to fall into a trap. 

He felt his blood boil and his soul cry for you 

His beloved 

His darling 

Stuck between the claws of a wicked elf! 

He had to save you! 

He had to intervene drastically. 

It was quite simple: a hunting trip, a quick shot at the back of the head, dumping the body in the nearest river, and returning home, abandoning the corpse to the unchained elements. 

Oh, you were devastated, in tears for days. Days he offered his shoulder for you to cry on, hugging you tightly to appease your pain and relieve you. He cradled you for days, slowly reclaiming his place in your heart. 

He knows the kind of cold and imposing aura He gives off as the Heir of the Crown, so He took care to be as tender and soft as possible, giving you glimpses of his loving, intimate side. 

But you were in terrible shape, your mood and body seemed to decay day after day... He kept coming to you every day, in the hope of seeing you smile his way, running to him to hug him tight and declare him your endless love now that the curse was lifted. 

But you never did, and each day you seemed closer and closer to dying of malnourishment. 

Was the curse still in place? 

He was walking to his brother to ask him for advice on how to lift a strong curse, as magic was more his brother’s passion than his. He had just the time to see you both enter your bedroom and lock yourself up 

He was frozen in place 

... 

His brother 

His twin 

The closest being in his life until you... 

He was going behind his back...?! 

He was abusing his face, similar to his, to gain access to your bed!? 

The surprise dissolved in his veins to make place for the bitter taste of betrayal and the heat of the flames of ire and hate. 

Prince Aodh watched you both exit your bedroom, hidden behind a marble statue, as his brother caressed your cheek tenderly while you nodded, wiping a tear off your cheek with a tight smile. 

He clawed the column, leaving fissures in the stone in his rage. 

That same night, He entered his oh so dear brother’s room in silence, pinning a charm of silence and secrecy to the door for nobody to hear them. He remained standing, watching his brother sleep peacefully in the large bed. 

Fooling around with humans is not exactly forbidden, but his brother always notoriously looked at the practice with disdain and some disgust. 

And what’s the first thing this traitor did once Prince Aodh brought his human mate home...?! 

He could not help the serpentine hiss escaping his lips as He grabbed his brother’s throat, feeling the blood and the air flowing in and out. 

For a minute, He fantasized about squeezing this white throat until He strangled this traitor! 

But instead, He took out a bottle from his pocket and slowly opened the lid. He dramatically lifted the bottle over his brother’s face and poured down everything. 

Immediately, the acid started devouring his brother’s flesh with a disgusting sizzling sound. 

His brother immediately awoke, screaming in pain as Prince Aodh admired the flesh swelling up with bubbles and reddening with all the blood seeping out of the gushing pores. 

It was... Fascinating to witness this face, the same as his, getting disfigured under his eyes, how the flesh swells like a fruit too ripe and bursts open, wounding his brother beyond repair. 

His brother fell to the ground, screaming at the top of his lungs, trying to tear his painful skin off for a modicum of relief, digging his nails into the gushing, bleeding flesh. He was wriggling on the ground pathetically when He pressed his foot down his ribcage to immobilize his brother, observing his result like he would a painting. 

The once handsome face is now a grotesque mask of swollen flesh falling off with fumes and visible bones. 

Maybe it will even kill his brother... He was losing strength by the second, and soon would lose consciousness, and maybe dive into the dark waves of death for good. 

Before he fainted, He lowered himself to press his lips to what he supposed to be an ear before and whispered. 

“You will never approach her again... Never.Again...” 

His brother was discovered unmoving the next morning by a now traumatized Help and transported to the infirmary promptly. To this day, he has not woken up. Prince Aodh forbade you to enter the chamber under the pretense that he was afflicted by an illness that would be fatal for a human. 

So you obeyed. 

Like a cute little darling. 

He was in heaven! 

Finally! 

He had you for himself!  

No other pesky rival was standing between you two! 

It was finally time to formally profess your love for each other and mate together for life. Of course, humans are a mateless species, but that is nothing a little bit of magic cannot fix! 

It will feel like a chain at first for you, but you will not mind since you will be bound to him. 

He cannot wait! 

Which brings us to today. 

He never forced himself on you, but that doesn’t mean He can’t initiate actions, so He will seduce you out of your mind and take you to bed this week, and He will taste the pleasure of the rut for the first time in his life. He will indulge so much! Keeping you in bed for a full month, breeding you over and over, authorizing you to leave the nests only for the most basic of human necessities, and grabbing you back in the sheets immediately. 

He will get you addicted to him, to his cock. Absolutely ruining any other male for you. He will make sure you become pregnant, locking you with him forever. You are not a cruel woman to deny your child a father, no matter how horrible He might be. 

But He doesn’t have to be horrible to you… 

If you stay with him, He will be the most gentle, tender lover you’ve ever met, satisfying you beyond measure. 

If you ever look at another person, however… You will taste his wrath and learn your mistake in pain. But He does it for you both, He knows what’s truly good for you! 

Him 

Solely him. 

What better for a human’s happiness than a willing, devoted elven prince anyway? 

You need no one else in your life. Not even your former family. You will forget them rapidly when He will be plaguing your mind 24/7. Just as you do to him. 

He absent-mindedly caresses a pillow of one of the nests. Younger him never knew why Elves’ bedrooms were so large and had so many pillows in them.  

For the nests obviously. 

It is quite common for couples to prefer a nest of pillows, furs, and plushies to their bed. And for the first time in his life, He understands why. 

Oh, He cannot wait…  

Embracing you in those soft, fluffy nests and taking you languorously until you cry out of love and exhaustion, while He keeps thrusting deep into you. Your cute face in tears and forced into the furs while you squirt violently around his cock. 

He caresses his lips with a deviant smile, oh He’s going to enjoy it so much… Having you completely cock drunk, a babbling mess while He towers over you in full control. Oh, that is going to be so sweet… 

And you will become pregnant! Let’s not forget that delicious fact. 

He cannot wait to see you round with his child, maybe his twins or triplets. He will give you so many children! Elves have very large families, He is no exception; his instincts scream at him to procreate as much as possible with you. 

He wants to meet his children now, having them running around you both all day long… He will be the most dotting father ever and love them all day long, spoiling them rotten, maybe even to your dismay 

He chuckles at himself. He is already fantasizing about your future children without even having tasted your lips yet! 

Silly him! 

But he cannot help it, you are his little birdie he desperately wants to cage.  

Sometimes he even doubts you love him with how little attention you give him or how uninterested you appear in his conversation, some days. 

But you do love him. 

He knows you do. 

And you better do. 

He has nothing against using chains and gags, but He would like you to be happy at his side, not just a captive! But once pregnant, you will do the only respectable thing to do and accept to bond with him. 

It will be your only way to remain alive after the offense of seducing the Crown’s Heir. 

Then you will be with him forever. 

Living happily together, surrounded by your numerous heirs. 

He also prepared for that; he modified his diet, intensified his training routine, and started to take remedies the royal apothecary promised him would boost his fertility every day. One day, you came into his office, and you asked him what those berries were that he was swallowing with such a large smile. He lied to you, pretending it was only his favorite treat. It was too soon to reveal he was already planning your future pregnancies so early in your secret love affair, and you would have been scared, and He doesn’t want to scare you, only to back you into a corner. 

You are two different species after all, He cannot let those things go to the hazard. 

One week ago, when He felt the first symptoms of the rut, He gulped down twice the dosage, just to be sure… 

Prince Aodh used to hate those symptoms, those heat waves and sore muscles, but today He welcomes them with so much pleasure. He also felt growing territorial and possessive. He always tolerated you having friends among his people, He is not a complete monster, but those last few days? They realized how terrifying He could be with a single glance in their direction. They didn’t even have to speak with you; only standing in your vicinity was enough to send him into a boiling rage! Especially the males! He would appear from out of nowhere, his aura murderous and shooting them with his red gaze and dump them with even more chores and duties, especially on the other side of the Palace, far away from you, his darling. 

One had the nerve to hug you, and He ordered his servants to wash and scrub your body for a full hour despite your complaints to get rid of his disgusting scent. He couldn’t help it, it was making him gag to smell another male on you.  

You didn’t see that friend from then on… 

The sun rises, signaling to him it is time to head to the Grand room where He organized a session with all his advisors to treat the State’s latest affairs. You’ll be here, obviously, as his devoted, cute little aide. He will gorge himself on your scent and presence, boosting him for the rest of the day.  

No, for the whole month! 

He walks peacefully towards the board room, back straight and head high, when He starts to feel a heat wave approaching. Oh well, he will take a bath later. 

He turns a corner and smiles. 

You are here, notebook in hand, as the cutest little human aide you are. You never wait for him, too visible, and he likes his privacy, so you took the habit of getting ahead of him for him to meet you midway. 

Clever you, you know he cannot reveal your love affair to the Crown yet, so you take action without him even asking! 

Such an intelligent mate. You can hold entire conversations just looking into each other’s eyes. You are truly made for one another. 

He doesn’t slow down as he reaches you, his heart sprinting as your hands graze for a split second. 

“Good morning, Your Highness .” You greet. 

“Good morning, (Y/n).” 

“You seem tense. Are you all right?” You ask, raising an eyebrow. 

Oh, sweet, adorable you, you know him so well… And you always take care of him, noticing in one glance that something changed in him, not that He tried to hide it from you. You can see those parts of him, you are allowed. 

And those heatwaves are not really comfortable… 

“Am I?” Prince Aodh asks with a lopsided grin, “Quite the contrary, I feel full of energy.” 

“Really? Good.” You nodded. “We will need it for today.” 

You think about the politics and warfare, He thinks about the bed. 

“I am sure it will be a productive day.” He slowly nods, approvingly. 

Your scent comes to brush his nose, and He deeply inhales, inviting it deep into his lungs. It sets his nerves on fire, electrifying him to his core. He feels his horns tingling deliciously. 

That feels so good… 

You reach the Tactical room where everyone else is waiting and take your place. He opens the Map of the Empire, and the session can start. 

------------------------------------------------- 

Everything was going so well. 

Prince Aodh was fully focused, mind set on his strategies, listening to his subordinates when it struck him like lightning. All his muscles suddenly violently contracted, chasing all the air out of his lungs. His usually so well-organized mind completely froze like stunted. It was so violent that He almost lost his balance and collapsed. But He held on, standing firm on his feet. 

And now there is only one thing he cares about. 

You. 

“Everyone… Out.” He says so coldly, a shudder spreads through the audience. 

“Your Highness? Did we do-” One starts to speak to understand this sudden shift of behavior. 

“Out!” He shouts, slamming his fist on the table. 

Everyone scurries outside, it’s the very first time they ever heard him raise his voice in a meeting, and they don’t intend to hear more! 

“(Y/n), you stay.” He orders harshly. 

He feels his cock gorging itself with blood, getting warmer and constricted in his tight pants. 

So this is how it truly feels… The sudden craving, hunger for flesh, that urge commanding all his senses and priorities. A desire so powerful that his only thought is to breed you immediately, right here and there, like an animal. 

You remain still, worried. You look at him, hugging your notebook against your breast, well hidden under that stupid tunic. He wants to tear it all apart, destroying it completely to discover your sweet naked body at last 

His hard gaze is on those incompetents who still haven’t evacuated the room. He turns towards the young helpers who are absolutely terrified, pressing themself at the door to leave as quickly as possible.   

If they don’t go away He will take you in front of them without any shame!  

They must have felt his black gaze on them because they suddenly managed to pass through the door and disappear away from him.  

The doors are shut. 

And He now turns towards you. 

You are now completely alone with a pissed-off Elven Prince. 

You are terrified beyond measure. He never raised his voice. Ever. He looks at you with a dark glare, like He could eat you up in one bite. 

You gulp. 

He skirts the large table, dark eyes fixed on you, frowning terribly. You press your notebook closer against you in a soothing manner. Did you do something? Said something? Angered him in some way? 

“Your Highness? Is something wrong?” You ask with tremors in your voice. 

You hope talking to him would snap him out of it, but He keeps walking towards you like a carnivore having cornered its prey. 

“Sir…” You call again. 

In complete silence, He seizes your notebook out of your grasp and just tears it in half like it’s nothing before tossing it aside. You gasp, shocked. 

“Sir! If I did-” 

You have no time to finish your sentence, his large hand comes to grasp your throat and pushes you against the wall, where He captures your lips in a demanding kiss. 

What the fuck is going on?! 

What’s wrong with the Prince?! 

Since day one, he looked at you in a weird fashion, and you consistently felt his breath on the back of your neck! Sometimes you were even sure to feel a presence in your room at night! You remained friendly and nice and polite, fearing he might explode all of a sudden. 

And right now, he is exploding. You are so shocked and terrified that you do not know how to react to his aggression, and you feel yourself frozen in fear. 

He presses his large body against yours, more petite in comparison. He squeezes your throat to force you to open your lips to let his tongue enter your mouth. He groans in the kiss like a pissed-off dragon as his tongue meets and hugs yours. 

You feel his erection against your pelvis, He brushes your groins together, leaving no doubt in your mind about what’s going to happen next. You moan pitifully, feeling yourself going limp. 

He suddenly grabs the back of your neck and pushes you unceremoniously against the wooden table, bending you over as your breath is cut. You have no time to register what He just did, He is behind you, towering over your figure and gripping the fabric of your pants, and violently tearing them off. 

“Sir?!” You beg, at loss for words.  

The Prince pulls on your sweet undergarments 

He cheekily hoped you would not be wearing any like a naughty girl, but opening you like a present is also nice.  

You try to rise up, but are immediately pushed back down with his hand on the back of your neck. 

“Do. Not. Move.” He orders with a chilling tone, inviting zero resistance. 

So you remain bent over, immobile, feeling the cold air hitting your exposed pussy. You gulp, throat dry, devoured by anxiety. 

You suddenly feel his wet tongue parting your folds. You grip the wood for dear life as He starts eating you out voraciously, like a starved animal.  

“Oh my gods, Sir…!” You gasp, out of your mind. 

He locates your clit and starts teasing it with sweet laps, circling it, gliding across it. He moans loudly to excite you further and you start feeling something wet leaking out of your pussy to roll on your thighs. He takes your clit in his mouth and sucks on it avidly, like a lollipop, making it roll between his lips and titillating it with the tip of his warm tongue. 

He just acts on instincts right now and they are telling him to devour your sweet pussy first. 

You press your hand to your mouth and immediately feel him bite the tender flesh of your thigh. 

“I forbid you to remain silent.” 

And to prove his point he takes a big, sloppy lap with the flat of his tongue from your clit to your perineum. You can’t help but moan in response, your legs starting to tremble under his care. 

“You are getting so wet. Good.” He praises you, but the tone is dark and… dangerous. 

He parts your pussylips with two fingers and probs your entrance with his tongue, drinking your slick loudly. 

“Ah! Yo-Your Majesty…” You choke on your words. 

“What is it, my darling? No male ever honored you this way? Such a shame.” He tuts. 

He grabs your butt with his two hands and penetrates you with his long, warm tongue. You can feel it waves inside you, grazing your sweet spot so deliciously, he circles it and glides across it with the tip of his tongue. 

Gosh, he wants to take you right now, but you could never take his size without any preparation. And he has always been curious about your pussy’s taste, and despite his urges it seemed like a good choice to him. His instincts are always right. 

He is always right. 

And your sweet gasps go straight to his cock, he is getting so painfully hard just hearing and tasting you. This is so addictive. He suddenly understands all those couples he used to look at with disdain. 

This is nothing like just sex, this is much more addicting and thrilling! 

This is just so… Right! 

He is not eating you out gently, but like a starved animal who just found a juicy piece of meat. He growls and purrs, satisfied by your tremors and quivers under his touch. This is how you should be with him all the time, a good girl for him to play all day long, a little bit fearful and dripping wet. 

He expertly opens his trousers to free his erection and starts pumping it in rhythm with your sweet mewls. You are like a little bird who sang the sweetest melodies for him.  

He has no idea if you ever squirted in your life but this is now his mission, you are not leaving his embrace until you squirted for him, no matter how many tries it takes, how many hours he will have to fuck you, you’re going to do it.  

For him.  

For his pleasure. 

He slurps down your essence loudly, satisfied with your taste. This is quite savory, you’re about to become his new favorite treat!  

“How does it feel?” He teases between sips, “Do you like it?” 

You, on your end, just cannot respond. The only sounds passing your lips right now are desperate moans as he eats you out conscientiously. Your brain is frozen in a fight-or-flight response.  

“My little bird does not wish to sing to me?” He growls. 

And he slaps your pussy. You shake with a groan of pain and pleasure, to your utmost distress. 

“Ah! It… I’ve never done that…” You confess, panting, praying he will take pity on you 

He smiles as he devours you 

Good. 

Your pussy will only know his lips and no one else. Only he will make you feel this good. 

“Vocalize your pleasure louder. I want the whole Palace to know who’s making you feel this good.” 

He laughs at himself internally. He who took care of hiding your love affair from anyone else is ready to throw everything through the window if it means everyone knows you belong to him and him only right now! 

The rut is truly something else. 

“Ah S-Sir...!” You call for him when he resumes tonguefucking you. 

But he can’t help it, you just taste so good. He will eat you out every morning from now on. Who cares if someone hears you through the wall of his bed chamber? 

Not him, not anymore. 

You’ll be mated anyway, so it is only normal that he fulfills his duty and takes care of his charming darling every day! 

You gasp as a wave of pleasure crashes upon you suddenly, so much you feel your pussy spurting something in his face with great force. Was that... An orgasm? 

You gulp, your first orgasm... At the hand of that creepy prince, white like a ghost and dead white eyes... You tried to remain on his good side by humoring him with conversations, but you did not foresee the trap you stepped into... 

He darkly chuckles, having reached his goal. You delivered splendidly! He licks his lips clean of your essence, feeling it beading from his chin. That was even better than he anticipated, the little jump his heart did when you squirted in his mouth as if he were a young child being offered a sweet! 

You try to catch your breath, still bent over the console, shaken by that orgasm and your fear, feeling your throat dry like the desert. 

You froze, hearing the sound of a belt behind you. 

“Oh sweet thing, this is only the beginning...”  He rasps, already thinking about this month of rut ahead of you two... 

So delicious. 

You feel his erection pressed against your spasming pussy, coating his shaft with your release. He feels… Large. Really large. Not that you are really surprised given his size, of course his penis would be as large as him. What you cannot determine, however, is his length. 

You bite your lips in anticipation and dread. 

You feel his tip probing your entrance, before feeling him pushing it inside. 

Oh dear Gods! He is so massive! Your inner muscles work to welcome his size inside of you, but you feel him splitting you in two. 

Your mouth opens in a perfect O, trying to accommodate his size, that’s a real challenge!  

“Your little pussy struggles to take me, and I am not halfway through.” He sadistically notes. 

He’s not halfway through?! 

No way! How are you…? How could you…? 

“Stop struggling.” He orders, “I feel you clenching all around my cock, if you do not want me ramming into you immediately it is best you relax.” 

“I’m... I just...!” You choke, digging your nails in the wood of the table, hanging on for dear life. 

How are you supposed to survive this...? 

He keeps pushing inside, filling you more and more, reaching depths you didn’t even know you had.  

“Relax, Darling. Breath.” He talks you through it with a softer tone, like he is pitying you. “We are almost there.” 

You feel his ridges brushing your inner walls, you feel his cocks having some sort of scales made of somewhat hard flesh but they caress your soft flesh so deliciously…  You gasp, breathless, when you feel his tip brushing your cervix deep inside you. 

You feel his hips brushing your butt, he is fully in.  

And that’s a feat! 

“You squeeze me so much, my darling.” He says in a gasp, “You were tailor made for my cock.” 

“I-I feel so stuffed!” You manage to let out while you try to breathe through your nose. 

Having his complete length inside you just chased all the air out of your lungs and your little pussy stretched to its maximum. If you were on your back and not your stomach, you would see a bulge, that’s for sure. 

“Well, thank you, my darling.” He licks his lips, “And this is all for you. Only for you. Now relax.” 

And without leaving you any time to adjust to his size, He starts thrusting inside you. Deep, hard thrusts punching the air out of our lungs each time. You feel his hips hitting your pussy harshly like a bull, assaulting your poor body. 

“Oh Maker! Sir, slow down! Please!” You choke on your own words. 

He rocks you so hard you almost bite your tongue at each back-and-forth movement. He fucks you roughly, without regard for your comfort on that sturdy table. You feel your poor pussy trying to take him ramming his whole length into you. Your release helps him slip inside easily, but doesn’t help his massive size problem. 

It also doesn’t help how uncomfortable and... soiled you started to feel. 

“I will not slow down.” He announces, deaf to your cries, “You can take it, I know it. You can take anything I give.” 

He grips your arms and holds them firmly with one hand on your back while the other holds your hip, preventing you from falling forward.  

Prince Aodh fucks you as voraciously as He ate you out, gluttonously and harshly. He keeps his merciless pace as you try desperately to keep some dignity as you feel him fucking your brain out. You feel your pleasure growing, not softly and nicely, but like a furious wave growing like a tsunami under his brutal rhythm. So much that a bit of drool starts dripping out of your mouth. 

His tip hits your cervix relentlessly and his ridges scratch the inside of your pussy savagely, scratching every sweet spot at once and making you see hyperspace behind your eyelids. 

“Fuck!” You shout. 

“What foul language, my darling. Should I also fuck your mouth to teach you manners?” 

His hand holding your hip sneaks under your stomach to reach your nervous clit, pulsating with your heartbeat. He starts rolling it between his fingers while he rams into you like an animal. He pounds into you like it is his last day alive, and you can’t do anything but take it, like a toy for him to play with. You can do so little, you are barely more than a fuckdoll for him. 

He is torn on his end. 

On one hand, this is so pleasurable, so fantastic, it sends him into such spirals of pleasure and heightens all his senses in such fashion! He gorges himself on your scent, of your pathetic moans of the wet sounds of your little pussy…It drives him so crazy, he wonders if he could ever slip out of you. 

He would surely die if he ever did that. 

And on the other end, he hoped to take you nicely and languorously for hours on end for days, helping you reach new heights of pleasure and taking care of you romantically, not take you like a monster. Him who used to treat you so tenderly in each and every fashion like the fragile porcelain doll you are… 

But this rut… 

This is something so strong, so unstoppable and unfightable. 

It took him by complete surprise, robbing him of his control. 

But for once in his life He decides that is not so bad… 

He gasps as he feels your small pussy clenching around his large girth. You strangle him so, so well, just the right size for him to enter and squeeze him deliciously. You truly are made for him and his cock. 

And absolutely no one else! 

He hopes you would be able to forgive him for fucking you in such a way! You deserve to be worshiped and idolized like a goddess all night long, and he had the firm attention to pamper and venerate you like his personal Goddess... He will make it up to you! He will spend the next hours adoring you for you to pardon him for his transgression! 

You feel your pussy clenching more and more under the growing waves spreading in your veins, setting fire to each nerve ending until you scream His name out loud. 

It was completely unprompted; it escaped you while you tried to gasp for air, but your orgasm crashed on you so suddenly it took you by surprise. The tsunami reached the shore and devastated everything in its wake.  

“Keep screaming, My Darling. I want everyone to know who is fucking you this good.” 

You convulsing around him pushes him beyond pleasure, and He comes inside you without your consent after three more deep thrusts. He buries himself deep, spurting his seed in your most secret place. He feels your entire body tensing, then slumping, like all your strength escaped your organism with a “oof.” 

He gently caresses the cheeks of your butt with his large warm hands as he catches his breath, still deep inside. He slips his disheveled strands of long hair back on his head and opens his leather straps to get rid of his plate armor and his now-sweaty tunic. 

This is a really nice physical exercise! Far more enjoyable than his dry and boring warrior training. It could become his new routine! He always has been more than serious with his training, but he would look up to this new exercise each day, and he would partake with so much enthusiasm! 

You surely would not object! He would give you so much pleasure each and every day… 

He slips out of you and makes you roll on your back. You are still catching your breath while he has already recovered. Humans are no match for Elves’ stamina after all. He growls as he sees his semen oozing out of you.  

You are already wasting it! 

He collects it with his fingers and pushes it back inside, penetrating your sex with his slender digits. He sees you shaking with this simple touch, you are still so sensitive after all… He cleans you with his fingers, fingering it back inside your greedy womb that tries to retain him inside. He grins lightly. Your body doesn’t seem satisfied with two orgasms and seems to already call for him and his talents again.  

You, on the other hand, seem exhausted. 

He enters you again, localizing your G-spot easily, and starts brushing it eagerly. You mewl tiredly in response but your body’s answer is undeniably positive, your pussy stretches enthusiastically, dripping wet, and your legs spasm each time he scratches your spot with the pad of his fingers.  

“Sir…” You try to call, your hand lazily raising to grab his arm and stop him. 

But you have no energy left, and let your hand fall back to your side. He keeps fingering you, enjoying the ungodly wet noises of your pussy, stuffed with his white cum. 

One won’t be enough.  You need to do it again. Over and over again, until your cute tummy is completely bloated with his semen.  

Then, and only then, he will consider that he did a sufficient job. 

He pushes a third finger inside, and you whimper, like sweet music. Prince Aodh scissors you thoroughly, admiring your entrance gaping around his fingers. He can’t believe such a little pussy could take him so well, He actually thought you would not and break under him. But you did. And quite well, considering it. 

You gave him so much pleasure already, choking his shaft so lusciously, hugging his form so perfectly He felt like he could mold your insides for his specific shape, ensuring that any potential rival is terribly disappointing to you. 

But there will be no potential rival. In any shape or form. 

“Your... Higness…” You pitifully call again, your chest rising up and down as you breathe. 

“Is there a problem, my Darling? Are you in pain?” He investigates, just to be sure. 

He is not a monster after all. 

“No… No but-” You throw your head back with pleasure as He accelerates his ministrations. “Ah!” 

You’re in no pain, that’s all He wanted to know. 

“Let it happen, my darling. There is no use fighting it, let me take care of everything.” He charms you with his enthralling, deep, melodious voice. 

He circles and crosses your G-spot, rubbing it roughly while adding pressure with a hand on your Venus mound, earning sobs and moans from your part. He adds pressure on your clit with his thumb, gliding across it and flicking it, feeling you dripping off his hand as He hooks you from inside. He accelerates his care, stretching your pussy well as you tremble under his hand, knuckles deep, curling and spreading them, making his fingers twirl to caress any inner surfaces of your pussy. He then resumes fingering you mercilessly until you cry your eyes out, big tears rolling down as your pussy spasms around his soaked digits. 

You come again, shuddering dramatically. While you try to catch your breath again, He lowers himself to the level of your pussy to make sure all of his potent semen was inside, where it should be. He traces your pussylips with his fingers, utterly fascinated by that jewel of nature. 

He kisses your slit with reverence and raises back on his feet. 

He looms over you and pulls your tunic over your chemise. He takes out his blade and cuts it open, revealing your breast to his eyes. He feels his own eyes rounding up as He discovers them in plain sight, your nipples standing up to attention as the cold bites them. 

Your boobs are just to his taste, just how he likes them. 

He grabs them in his large hand and kneads them well, rolling your nipples between his fingers. He leans forward and takes one in his mouth, sucking on it. 

Soon, when he does that again, He will taste your milk. He will drink from your tits when they get heavy with milk. He cannot wait… 

He kisses it and takes the other one in his mouth, licking across the soft skin, peppering it with soft kisses as you sob, cheeks soaked, your hand coming to caress his hair. 

He stands back straight, slicking his long hair back, letting sweat roll on his gorgeous body, his skin glistening with sweat. His white eyes shine hungrily in the low light of the room, fixated on your form under him. 

He pumps his cock one or two times, hardening already again and pushes it back inside, your essence acting up as lube. He watches fascinated how his penis disappears inside your body, a creamy O at his base.  

The bulge is consequent, and He can’t help a dark snicker. You are going to be gorgeous, all round with his child… 

He resumes his hard thrusting, gripping your hips harshly, digging his nails into your soft flesh to keep you in place. He watches your boobs bobbing up and down, hypnotized. You whimper, tears rolling down your cheeks, as all of this is way too much for you. You’re oversensitive, and He keeps the pleasure rolling longer and farther, teasing your nerves until you break down completely. 

But He wants more. 

He broke down your sentiments, but He wants to break down your mind, utterly destroying it. He wants you dumb and cockdrunk, stuffed with his seed like the good girl he knows you are. So He keeps burying his girth deep in you, brushing your G-spot with the edges of his ridges  

He needs to give you more loads or you’ll never get pregnant!  

What if the remedies He took were not enough? He worries in the back of his mind. What if nothing was enough and you’ll never get pregnant? What if your two species are ultimately incompatible? 

Prince Aodh pushes these thoughts back. 

Of course, He’s going to get you pregnant. He is The Prince, a warrior, an Elf. Nothing is impossible to him. 

He would not allow any other results. 

He rocks his hips into yours, reveling in the pleasure you are giving him. He undulates his body with delight, meeting your dripping sex, the sounds of flesh hitting flesh echoing in the large room. He chases both of your releases while you fully tremble underneath him, He seizes your thighs with his large hands and spreads them wide open, throwing your legs on his shoulders, allowing him to deepen his thrusts. 

Oh that is just so good… 

He hoped his first time with you would have been romantic and sweet. He still has a heart full of love and devotion after all, He thought that after a date at a gallery, He would have treated you to a nice dinner before carrying you to bed and honoring you all night long. But instead, He is ramming into you like a beast, in the middle of his boardroom on his ship for all his crew to hear, trying to break you into a million pieces under him. 

You truly never know what life has in store for you! 

In all honesty, He didn’t know it would go so well. He feared entering you for the first time would have him come undone right here and there, and it almost happened! He had to collect all his will to not explode inside just by entering you. His honor would have never recovered if He had come before satisfying his darling first! 

What kind of elf would he be then? One that only chases his own pleasure like a self-centered jerk? He likes to think of himself as above that. 

Granted, you are in this situation because he couldn’t help but chase his own release, but that is completely beside the point! 

He circles his hips to vary the sensations, and you bite your lips to blood in response. 

“What did I say about silencing yourself?” He scolds you, growling. 

He seizes your jaw, pressing your cheeks like a fish, and leans forward dangerously, shooting you with his feverish gaze. You look so silly like that. 

“This is the last time I warn you, understood?” He demands with a dark tone. 

You can only nod with your silly expression, eyes round with surprise and submission. That looks good on you. He leans further to lick your cheek as He rocks his hips, realizing you soiled it with your drool, smeared all over your jaw. Did you lose all control? He wonders, snickering. 

He captures your lips for a messy kiss, tongue dancing, and drool exchanging. You whine, having your air robbed out of you, and He accentuates his thrusts to have you reach higher notes. The Prince lies fully on you, taking you in his arms to hug you tight, his thrusts are still mean and hard, hurting your pelvis with his raw strength.  

“Focus on kissing me, sweet thing.” He orders, between little kisses all over your jaw. 

He feels you drooling on yourself as your lips meet again, and that amuses him tremendously. He moans in the kisses, burying himself to the hilt as your pussy swallows him whole as it should. 

His heart is singing. Is it what true bliss feels like? Being one with your other half… 

He licks your lips as you roll your eyes inside your skull, too lost in the pleasure and utter fear he gives you. He keeps bullying his length into you, embracing you with his long arms. He sneaks his hand under your tunic on your back and buries his nose in the crook of your neck to inhale your musk. His heart flutters, pumping his blood at 100 miles per hour. It has been so long since he felt excitement like that, such pure joy, having you close like that, sharing such an intimate and vulnerable moment with you. He brushes the tip of his nose on your neck, purring deeply while you keep whimpering in his ears, arms circled around his large form and legs circled around his waist, keeping him deep buried in your puffy pussy. 

You long stopped trying to formulate sentences, your brain is too fried for you to speak proper Elvish, instead just letting broken mewls escape you. But that is as good for him, that is a testimony of the overwhelming pleasure he is giving you, and He revels in it with pride. 

Your inner walls are all gorged with blood, fluffy and soft for his cock, your pussy is clenching painfully around him and your clit is pulsating furiously, begging for attention. You snake one hand between your two bodies to caress it, and maybe ease your painful muscles, prompting him to look down at what you are doing. 

“Sorry, my darling. You invaded all of my mind, and I lost track of things.”He apologizes. 

One of his large hands follows yours and starts to tease your bundle of nerves instead of your more petite hand. 

What kind of idiot is He? How dare He lose himself so much to stop paying attention to your needs? He chastises himself. 

Prince Aodh thoroughly rolls and presses your clit between his fingers as He undulates his hips with the energy of a beast. He resumes kissing you, feeling so light, like all his pressure and problems just vanished in your presence. He hugs your tongue with his, dancing with it, robbing you of your breath. 

You feel the waves of pleasure spreading through your veins and your pussy, making it convulsing ferociously and you come for the fourth time, screaming the Prince’s name. 

Once again, your orgasm pushes his and He comes deep inside your womb for a second time.  

This time you notice. 

“You came inside?” You ask breathlessly, visibly worried,  

“Oh my.” He responds with a lopsided grin, caressing the bulge made by his shaft with his warm hand, “Then we will have no other choice but to take care of a little one.” 

Abortion is out of the question. For you? With his child? Out of the question. He will not even entertain the idea. 

“Wha-What? … But Your Higness!?” You blabber, your voice completely broken between your tears. 

“I will take my responsibilities with you and the kid, do not worry about anything.” He puts his forehead against yours, shiny white eyes buried in yours. “I will not disappear and leave you alone. Everything will be alright. We will be together.” He embraces you tightly. “You need not worry.” 

He cradles you gently, hearing your shallow, rapid breaths. He sighs, satisfied. 

Well, not completely. Two is still not enough. He starts a back and forth movement again, but this time slow, gentle, loving, languorous… 

"A... Again?” You sob incredulously, at the end of your own rope 

 He brushes his nose with yours. 

“I told you earlier I was full of energy today… I know you are tired, my darling, but you do not need to cry like that. Let me do the work. Easy, easy... ” 

He holds your cheeks in his hands, forehead against forehead, purring gently and deeply. 

This. 

This is true bliss. True happiness. You and him, locked together forever. Legacies tied in reputation and now blood. 

“What will I do if I get pregnant?” Your tears keep rolling down your cheeks as your shoulders shake, “Your fiance will hunt me down, the Crown, your Parents will hang me for the offence, I... I am going to die!.” You start panicking 

Aodh growls at such a childish display, making you freeze. Why won’t you drop the subject? Or better yet, why don’t you see it as the absolutely marvelous good news for your couple as he does? 

Now that you’ve mated together, no need to hide the affair, no need to refer to each other as simple ‘friends’ as you did until now! You will be able to live your love under the sun! 

“You will not lose anything. I will keep you at my side, whatever might happen. No one will even touch a single strand of your hair on that splendid head of yours.. Like I said…” He looks into your eyes with the most serious expression you have ever seen on his face and… Some underlying hunger and jealousy, “... Do not worry about anything.” 

[zoneofsmites]

Im of the full (possibly delusional) belief that Durge is not the species that they physically appear to be.

You’re telling me this being crafted from nothing but bhaal’s flesh and his blood - this demigod - is actually a dragonborn/tiefling/human/elf/etc.

No. This thing is bhaal’s flesh and it just happens to look like that. They’re an imitation of a species, they’re not truly a (full)mortal being, they have no heritage aside from bhaal.

As a result I’m sure there’s some…oddities.

For example, a demigod child, not fully mortal. I doubt they adhere to the lifespan of whatever species they look like. Looking younger than they should. (less so perhaps with long lived races like elfs and half-elves where that is par for the course).

A dragonborn durge that by all accounts looks like a blue dragonborn but their breathweapon is acid. A tiefling durge that seems to be a Mephistopheles tiefling but they cannot cast mage hand, instead smiting like a zariel bloodline tiefling.

An elf or tiefling durge that doesn’t read as fey or infernal trough identification spells. Because they aren’t either of those things. Perhaps they could read as divine but not quite.

Members of a race that durge is supposed to be looking at them and sometimes when making eye contact they read as wrong. And some kind of uncanny effect triggers in their brain.

Give me more freaky durge who isn’t really what they appear to be at all. Just a little murder demigod crafted from dead god flesh to be the shape of something else.

[talesfrommedinastation]

My Redneck Neighbor Doug has watched The Bad Batch Season 3 opener:

LEEEEET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!

This is more pithy than normal: Doug's been busy with work, as have I. But I'm determined to hear his thoughts on The Daddy Warcrimes 'n Company so here we go!

These were all via text messages, btw.

CW: Doug Doug's as you know Doug will do. Away!

---------------------------------------------------

Episode 1: 'Little Orphan Blondie's Shit Internship at The Museum of Science and Industry'

Poor Little Orphan Blondie, stuck in The Museum of Science and Industry in a shit summer job because they got bills to pay. Except they got rid of the dinosaurs and walk in heart and filled it with gross shit.

Hey look, they still got the coal mine exhibit! Man I miss Chicago.

(Doug, that museum has never had dinosaurs. “What, since when?”)

MUTANT JIMMERS EVERYWHERE! Aw, Little Orphan Blondie gave one her chicken nuggets! And it’s shy, aw, I hope it’s okay.

Poor Mutant Jimmers…she named her?! Swear to Christ Almighty if that dog gets Old Yeller’d I’ll just lose it. 

That freaky alien thing that ran the mall on the ocean looks sad, I bet she wishes she fell into the water and got eaten by a shark or something. I wish you did too, lady. 

The Sons of Robocop really are everywhere, they must be a cult or something. They look cool, I’d join, why not. Think they get 401ks?

Oh man, Daddy Warcrimes is down bad. Poor Daddy Warcrimes. Man, all my clone boys are stooped and sad…this ain’t good. 

At least Little Orphan Blondie can craft! Man, she should start selling those at the Museum of Science and Industry’s gift shop. Maybe Tarkin can bring one back for the grandchildren he’s not allowed to talk to since the restraining order was put in.

Oh, there’s Stepsister Beth, she seems on edge. Must’ve gotten divorced recently, don’t blame her ex, I bet she screamed at him for leaving cabinets open who knows. How do her eyeballs not hurt after wearing those dumb glasses all day?

Episode 2: 'Night Elves and Neverland Ranch'

The night elves from Warcraft invaded Star Wars and got horns or something and now they have a castle that looks like a boss level in Diablo IV or V or how many Diablo games they got now.

Now they yelling at people and throwing them in the basement today. Makes sense, gotta fight the orcs and stuff. Think they fight the orcs in the basement?

The Night Elf Horned Queen hired Daddy Rambo and Julio to get people, I guess they’re turning into Boba Fett or something. They got her son's horn back, guess that's good. Oh they need new paint jobs on their armor.

Do they end up in the basement in the Diablo Boss Level? No? And off they go! 

Daddy Rambo and Julio are in their homeland of FLORIDA! Hell yeah, SPACE FLORIDA! And they’re bringing the talking trashcan with them using straps! Go Julio go!  Yeah, boa vines, this is TOTALLY the Everglades! 

Escaped clone boys! Oh man! Shit, is Neverland Ranch in the jungle? Oh man–oh, they know what they’re doing. Good kids. Real good kids. Oh what happened to the rest of them? Oh Meat Muffin, this ain't good :(.

You know what? Them clone boys are smart, take it back, this ain’t Space Florida, this is Space Louisiana! Them baby boys gone get feral and run off into the bayou and live in the caves and now you know my origin story, Meat Muffin! 

If this was Florida they'd just end up working the late shift at Zaxby's and smoking rocks in the parking lot. We know better, we French and all.

I bet they’ve been living on nutria and half-empty chicken boxes from behind the gas stations. Resourceful scrappy kids and I can tell its making Daddy Rambo proud.

Oh holy SHIT, there go them vines! It's like the kudzu all over again, maybe this is LaFourche Parish?

See, them boys are definitely white trash, Mandalorian rednecks. Look at em, living in the woods and hijacking a plane, but they good kids, saving their brothers. Even saved the robot too. 

Man, all the feels, them poor little boys. What will they do now?  Oh, they're going to Space Daytona! Good, wait, I saw the trailer, doesn't the Empire invade it? THIS AIN'T GOOD MEAT MUFFIN!!!

Wait...where's Toaster Strudel and Rex?

Episode 3: 'Blondie Got a Gun'

Well here's the Emperor. He wants to be immortal. Gotta make that other movie make sense or something.

Where's Darth Vader? Is he running the government when the Emperor is running around giggling?

Don’t you DARE kill Mutant Jimmers, you damn droid. I hate that ugly assed stupid thing. It looks like its scarecrow daddy fucked a microwave and then left it enough money to go to Planned Parenthood but instead spent it on crack and there ya go.  

Oh shut your goddamned yap, Jimmy the Scientist. I bet he gloves that hand up because he keeps shoving it up his own ass and that's why he walks funny all the damn time.

The Emperor also has a Diablo IV or VIII boss level all to himself too at the Museum of Science and Industry. How many Diablo games are there, Meat Muffin?

YEAH, LITTLE ORPHAN BLONDIE! GIT ER DONE!!! They're out! Oh wow! There she goes with Daddy Warcrimes! Kill em all and let GOD SORT THEM OUT! That's my GIRL!!!!

Blondie’s got a gun 

Blondie’s got a gun

Her whole world's come undone

Shooting droids is FUN!

GO MUTANT JIMMERS GO!!!! 

YEAH BLONDIE DADDY WARCRIMES AND MUTANT JIMMERS!!!!!!

I AIN'T A BULLS FAN BUT REPEAT THE THREE PEAT! YEAH!!!!!!

....so when we gonna get Toaster Strudel and Rex? Next one? Where's my reg boys?!

-----------------

Tagging those who missed my Cajun neighbor. LOOKS LIKE REDNECK DOUG IS BACK ON THE MENU, BOYS!

@skellymom @amalthiaph @eyecandyeoz @cdblake1565 @sued134 @merkitty49 @supremechancellorrex @yeehawgeek @wrenkenstein @techs-stitches @deezlees @autistic-artistech @perfectlywingedcrusade @auntie-venom @megmca @thecoffeelorian

[sorcerous-caress]

Glad you also has human kink I love thinking about humans place in fantasy world

There is this joke of how horny humans are because like all the halflings are half humans. Imagine if human durge has this characteristic too but it dials to 11. They fucked everyone that is sapient enough, basically fuck their way back to Bhaal temple

Also thank for welcoming me I love your blog

— RED Anon

Human kink goes hard.

Generally, most fanatasy races barely tolerate each other. So i like to think of humans as the only ones to form a decent enough relationship with other races by basically forcing themselves into their cultures and living amongst them. Humans spread wide and far and we're not picky either, we will get accustomed to any culture, climate and way of life.

Humans are just too flexible, they fit wherever you place them which is why it came no one's surprise when a good chunk of those reclusive races started to fuck their friendly accommodating human neigbours.

Half-everything human rule. If something exists and it's sapient with consent, then there is a human somewhere very willing to mate with it.

Dragons, elementals, jins, devils, angels, incarnations, and even gods.

Humans are just the most open-minded when it comes to getting freaky in bed. Not to mention they tend to be...very easily swayed into getting in the said bed with someone.

A lot of them even just do it out of pure curiosity! They just want to learn more so badly they're willing to be turned into a cute little whore for that said person.

I even bet you that the most obnoxious races secretly fantasise about humans. The only species with a reputation for being easy sluts and you want them not to fantasise about meeting a cute little human that they easily impress just by being themselves then take them back to their home?

High elves probably cream themselves at that idea of a lowly human being so impressed with their simple cantrip magic tricks that most other elves would laugh at.

So when bhaal made his favourite spawn in the image of a human, he knew exactly what he was doing.

The butler tells you in-game that he will personally find you a different breeding mate if yours isn't sufficient, or ten even.

Human Durge, murder and sex go along so well together that you can't have a full human durge without both.

[trickstarbrave]

i havent drawn her yet but fine. i made a new nerevarine

artemisia septim, bastard princess of uriel conceived around the time just before jagar tharn ended up imprisoning uriel in a pocked dimension of oblivion (events of arena). uriel didn't really want her, but given she wasn't born to a random maid, he agreed to raise her but she's pretty much locked up in her wing of the imperial palace with only a nanny and tutors. she never knew her mother, just that she was a noblewoman who agreed to stay silent if he took responsibility.

after jagar tharn was defeated uriel vii focused more efforts on legitimate heirs and clearing out any potential spies. her nanny is killed on suspicion of being a spy who aided jagar tharn along with several of her maids. artemisia is only 11-12. she begins to hate him.

because she's an elf she's still young by the events of morrowind, at least as far as elves age. it makes her feel even more alienated in the imperial palace. she only ever speaks to her siblings and father in formal settings, otherwise they rarely acknowledge her. she studies magic but she knows uriel vii is a very. paranoid person for a good chunk of her life following his imprisonment. time breaking after the warp in the west probably did not help anyone. elves as i write them age normally until around the 20's after which it DRAMATICALLY slows down, but everyone expects her to be a fully mature woman who's nearly 40 (maybe she's younger idk i might set her story a few years before the official game. or maybe later. we'll see) bc theyre all imperials. she's like. baby to most elves though.

she's sent on a diplomatic mission to morrowind for politics. she's just excited to fucking leave the imperial city and GO SOMEWHERE. she finds the palace stiffing and filled with horrible memories. she wants to see something new, and she always read about morrowind. to her its a dream come true to finally get to see it in person and she's so excited she can hardly sleep.

of course. uriel sent her to morrowind because he knew the political tensions there were too high to send one of his legitimate heirs. he's hoping she doesn't die but also he needs an ambassador and wants to make a good impression. if she is attacked and killed though he intends to use it to put morrowind more heavily under his thumb. he also, given he has some prophetic abilities, has a good feeling about sending her there.

she's super excited at first even though things are. tense. they were told uriel had a dunmer daughter but she doesn't look like a dunmer at all. even being half. they've seen half-imperial half-dunmer children and she doesn't look like a dunmer even remotely. she has pointed ears but her skin has a golden hue and her hair is stark white and her eyes are red. she explains she was born with a condition that lead to only patches of grey skin that faded as she got older but that her mother was definitely a dunmer. they question if she actually had an affair with an altmer and not the emperor behind her back but in a way she can still hear, but dismiss it as the empire playing tricks on them to make them look stupid. she isn't half dunmer. the emperor must think theyre stupid and is passing off his altmer born bastard as a dark elf like they can't tell she doesn't have grey skin. (nerevar was rly coming through on this one. azura had to much fun in the create a sim i think)

however some sixth house members strike. orvas dren tipped them off that a septim would be coming for a diplomacy meeting and their plan was to kidnap her, hold her hostage, make her a dreamer, and then send her back to the imperial palace with plenty of ash statues.

caius ends up rescuing her and taking her back to hide in his house. she's freaking out bc what the fuck there's a freaky ass cult in morrowind?????????? were they gonna kill her?????? did the emperor know????????? and now she's stranded in the country until caius can figure out a way to smuggle her out without someone knowing but he suspects there might be sixth house infiltrators in nobility who would catch them. they can't risk him just plopping her in a boat while they also hide in wait there and caius in good conscious can't let her die when uriel tasked him with protecting her by any means. so instead he gives her a slight haircut, some commoner clothing, and tells her they're gonna give her a fake identity

she's like. "great im stuck in a fucking skooma den on this fucked up island and theres ash storms here and weird cultists and im miserable and i almost died and--"

"here's 200 gold, buy some other gear, say you're a half altmer mage coming here to study, join the mages guild and try not to get yourself killed. i have a few contacts in the guild i told to keep an eye out for you and keep you safe. do NOT do anything reckless. do you understand."

artemisia realizing that she gets to join the mages guild and do whatever she wants now:

[malthemagnifisent]

Pairing: M!elfMC x Aerin (it’s more pre relationship)

Plot: Baldur takes it upon himself to flirt with MC, and is more then a little annoyed when MC swiftly turns him down. Aerin however is far more please with the development then his brother is.

Note: This was inspired by some tags that @guinevre left on the last fic I wrote. So thank you for the idea!

Tags: @oh-so-youre-a-nerd @lancelotsimp @antarees-8 @vicissavior @ladylamrian

Cyrus didn’t really know what to make of the two princes they’d come across in the forest. They didn’t appear to be dangerous, and they may even prove useful, so he saw no reason to pry into their business any further than they already had.

 

They had settled down on the banks of one of the weirdest lakes Cyrus had ever seen, but he wasn’t about to complain. The glowing water was a bit freaky, but it was also beautiful, and he could ignore the weirdness long enough to appreciate that.

 

He’d taken a seat on a rock and was sorting through his bag, which had become a mess after wandering around for so long. His mind kept wandering back to his talk with Prince Aerin as the two of them walked around the lake.

 

He wasn’t sure what to make of the man, but he’d been respectful, perhaps even a little charming, and he would be lying if he said he wouldn’t like to delve deeper into the prince’s rather fascinating mind.

 

Suddenly a shadow fell over him, and when he looked up, it was to meet the gaze of the elder prince, who was looking down at him with an unpleasant leer twisting at his thin lips.

 

“You shouldn’t waste your time on my brother,” Baldur said, reaching down and tapping the tips of his fingers below Cyrus’ chin, keeping his head tilted up as he continued. “You were right to think you’d need protection in this forest, but he’s not the one you should turn to.”

 

Cyrus raised a single imperious eyebrow and leaned away from Baldur’s touch, though the prince seemed unperturbed as he took a seat beside Cyrus with that same leering smile.

 

“And I suppose you’re the one I should turn to; is that what you’re saying?” He asked, placing his hands behind him on the rock so he could lean back and watch Baldur with a thoroughly unimpressed expression.

 

Baldur leaned after him and lowered his voice almost suggestively. “If it came down to it, then I’m certainly the one you’d want between you and danger,” he said, reaching out to touch the hem of Cyrus’ shirt. “I’d protect you, of course, and I could think of a few ways you’d be able to show your appreciation." He leaned in closer, his lips nearly brushing against Cyrus’ ear, making the elf’s lips curl.

Cyrus had a feeling that Baldur was used to getting his own way, and he expected Cyrus to swoon and bat his eyes. He’d end up disappointed because the man simply wasn’t his type, which was quite an achievement because Cyrus’ type tended to be just about everyone.

 

He’d slept with half his party, and the ones he hadn’t slept with, he’d certainly kissed. It wasn’t hard to get him in bed, but if that was what Baldur was after, he was failing miserably.

 

“I haven’t met many elves; people say they’re prudes, but I doubt you’re one to turn down a good time." Perhaps Cyrus would have been intrigued if that proposition came from someone else, but every word from Baldur’s mouth sounded self-important and rude, so all it managed to do was make his nose crinkle with disgust.

 

The tips of Baldur’s fingers brushed beneath his shirt, and like lightning, Cyrus grabbed the man by the wrist and pulled his hand up. “Keep your hands off of me,” he muttered, standing up as he roughly shoved Baldur’s hand and took a step away, moving back toward his companions, who were currently arguing over something by the fire.

 

Behind him, Baldur scoffed and stood as well. “Fine, I could pay for a whore better than you anyway,” he snapped, quietly enough that only Cyrus could hear.

 

The words were clearly meant to cause offense, but they just pulled a sharp laugh from Cyrus', and he paused to stare over his shoulder. "No, you couldn't; I doubt you pay them well enough to really try,” he said, smiling condescendingly before he turned sharply on his heel and began to march away, only to stop abruptly when he came face to face with Aerin, whom he considered to be the better half of the two brothers.

 

“You’re quiet,” Cyrus commented, a little shocked by how he hadn’t even noticed Aerin before. He moved so silently, almost like Mal in a way, but he doubted a prince like Aerin was a master thief, so his silence had to be for another reason.

 

Aerin leaned to the side to look over at his brother, who appeared to have gotten up and stormed over to the edge of the lake, sulking. “He doesn’t usually get told off,” he said, smiling as he spoke, clearly enjoying the fact that his brother didn’t get what he wanted.

 

Cyrus didn’t really understand how Aerin and Baldur could be so different and how Baldur could be so unkind to his brother. Kade and Cyrus hadn’t always agreed, but they’d never shown any outright hatred towards each other, while the only emotion Baldur seemed capable of showing toward Aerin was just that: hate.

 

“I gathered that, but he's not really my type, and I’m not going to be swayed by power,” Cyrus said, slipping his hands into his pockets as he shifted to the side and stood in the way of Aerin’s gaze, stopping him from staring at his brother.

 

Aerin seemed to break out of a daze, and he looked up at Cyrus with a small smile and asked, "What's your type then?” He asked, his cheeks turning a soft pink, but his eyes never wavered.

 

Cyrus got the impression that Aerin didn’t often flirt, which made the attempt feel sweeter. He returned the smile and let his eyes wander downward, skirting across Aerin’s body for the barest of moments before he looked back up into his eyes. “Academics,” he said, fighting not to let his smile grow into a grin, which was hard to do when Aerin’s eyes widened and his cheeks grew darker.

 

It wasn't entirely the truth, because Cyrus’ taste was far broader than that, but there was something about Aerin’s studious air that did intrigue him.

 

His good looks didn’t hurt either, though those were secondary to Cyrus.

 

“He probably only talked to you so he could upset me,” Aerin said, and for a brief moment there was a flash of something dark in his eyes, a hatred and anger that Cyrus wasn’t sure he liked. It was gone in an instant, and he thought perhaps he’d imagined it.

 

Cyrus placed his hands into his pockets and smiled a little teasingly before he leaned down and met Aerin’s eyes. “And why would it upset you if he flirted with me?” He asked, biting his lip to hold in a laugh as he watched Aerin start to grow flustered. “Are you smitten with me already?”

Aerin didn’t seem to know where to look, glancing around at lightning speed before his gaze finally settled down on their feet. “I wouldn’t say I’m smitten, but Baldur is good at getting under my skin; he probably saw that I like to." He broke off and took a little step back, finally looking up again, though he still didn’t meet Cyrus’ eyes.

 

“You like to what?” Cyrus prompted, stepping after the prince, wondering what comment was lingering on the man’s lips.

 

“I like to look at you; you’re captivating; you make me want to pick up a brush and capture you on canvas, though I have no skill at art,” he blurted out, reaching out to place his hand on Cyrus’ chest, keeping him an arm's length away. "Apologies; I know that must sound idiotic,” he added, clearly not having picked up on the smile that Cyrus’ was struggling to contain.

 

Cyrus grabbed Aerin by the wrist, holding him far more gently than he had when he’d done the same to Baldur just earlier. “It’s not idiotic; it’s quite flattering,” he said, stepping back a little so Aerin’s hand slipped from his chest and he was free to raise it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the prince’s knuckles.

 

Aerin’s fingers were soft, long, and delicate, almost like Nia’s in a way. “If I’m ever in White Tower, then I’ll even pose for you; let you learn to paint,” Cyrus added, standing up straight as he let Aerin’s hand fall.

 

Perhaps he was a bit heavy-handed with the flirting, but he enjoyed seeing Aerin’s cheeks turn pink. He got the impression that not many people took the time to pay such attention to the prince, and Cyrus was happy to be the first.

 

The sound of laughter from across the camp caught both their attention, and Cyrus leaned over to look at his companions with a fond smile. Mal seemed to be teasing Tyril, which was usual for them, but it still made him happy to see.

 

“Oi Cyrus, get over here!” Imtura called out, waving him over with a grin on her face.

 

Cyrus looked to Aerin again and tilted his head toward the fire where his friends were gathered. “You’re welcome to come with me,” he said, though he hoped he didn’t sound too eager, even though he certainly was.

 

Aerin seemed to seriously consider it for a moment before he shook his head. “You go; I should get some rest,” he finally said, shooing Cyrus away with a gentle flick of his hand.

 

As Cyrus turned, he briefly glanced back at Aerin, watching as the prince made his way over to Baldur, who was still glowering at the lakeside.

 

He could only hope that Aerin didn’t end up the victim of his brother's bad mood.

[niittinaatti]

Niiverse guys from around LG

I’m taking a little break from the guys in Zareen and putting some ocs in different kingdoms too. And yeah it’s more elves and similar, those are easy to draw and all

Strata and Helena grew up in Mogdir and are descendants of Yue’s little sister Curlinita. They don’t really care about being related to a divine, though their mother Esmeralda used to go on adventures with Yue but she’s dead now. They’re half-sisters half cousins, because after Strata’s father died, his brother comforted Esmeralda a little too hard which led to her getting pregnant with Helena. Strata was born with 13 fingers and weird double-pointed ears and Helena with 6 toes on each foot. Their fathers both had their own extra digits removed as kids but Esmeralda insisted on keeping Strata and Helena's because she believed they were lucky, and they think they’re pretty cool too.

Strata moved to Matuzu for higher education and is now a linguist working for the World Athenaeum specializing in dead and unknown languages from before Universa was created. Also is a demigirl and she/they because yes. Strata also likes embroidery and puzzle toys like rubik's cubes or burr puzzles or whatever they’re called here, and has a pet jungle gryphon named Umbra who they let stand on their head. I like to think jungle gryphons come in different breeds so they’re probably not all colorful.

And judging by the chest symbol she’s a Middayist, that was just from her old designs but I guess that would explain it. Most of her family aren’t though.

Helena still lives in Mogdir, she’s an adult book writer and her books are infamous for their long and imaginative torture scenes. Of course that makes them pretty controversial and Helena has been accused of being a nasty freak for decades, which is why she’s now a hermit living in the woods not interacting much with people and never reads her fan mail. She does definitely have a sadism fetish but doesn’t really mutilate people or anything, even if she thinks about it all the time. She and Strata haven’t talked in years either but that’s because they dislike each other in general.

Saku is a faun working in a cafe near where Helena lives and basically the only one she likes interacting with. He’s a total doormat, especially towards Helena who he has the big hots for and will pretty much agree to anything for her. So they’re friends with benefits (Helena doesn’t want to commit to a bigger relationship) and Saku is kind of a masochist so of course they do some freaky shit on his break. Don’t worry it’s totally consensual but sometimes she hits him a little hard and he can’t complain.

And yeah his antlers go through his cloak. In mogdir there’s a cloak guy making cloaks that have hidden little slits just for people with horns/antlers who want to wear cloaks

Ster & Loren & Penhoven: Ster and Loren are the king and queen of Redfox, Unseelie and Penhoven is their adopted drau daughter because they needed to have an heir. They married for pragmatic reasons (because they found each other hot basically) and burned down the house of the previous rulers and forcibly took their land cuz that’s all you need to gain power in Unseelie. Morgause hasn’t felt like killing any of them yet so it’s all fine and dandy.

Ster is an elf and is yet another constantly grumpy all the time guy and is hella powerful at tele magics, he will telepathically scream at you until you go insane or just teleport your organs out of your body if you don’t call him your majesty. He might also be related to Yue I'm not sure. Loren is an adhene with fire magic and will shoot a fireball at you if you piss her off, which is pretty easy. Penhoven is less mad than her parents, she likes having fun times and dog blood parties with zombies (tea parties are for Seelie sissies), and they spoil her a lot. There’s also Fizzy, their pet pink fuzzy worm monster forged by Yue when she visited them once. It looks silly but they love it (as much as monsters can) and declared it the national animal of Redfox even though there’s only one because the previous ruler’s pet fox bit Loren and now they outlawed foxes. They would try to change the city’s name to Pinkworm if they weren’t scared of annoying Morgause.

They even have a holiday similar to Groundhog Day in Ster & Loren's Redfox. When Fizzy comes out of its den on this day, if it sees its shadow, nobody is allowed to do spring cleaning or wear colorful clothes for another month. Nobody disrespects The Worm, it's the law

Ruukku is a rich maenad living in Matuzu who is a Model Citizen™, only drinks her wine at mealtime and doesn’t slut around. She’s a kids book author & illustrator, they’re like those old wholesome kids books with pretty painted illustrations of cute kids and animals like little golden books or something. Ruukku only likes classical music and grows roses in her garden, and she’s not royalty, but just wears a crown because she’s rich. She’s basically the anti-Helena, in fact a few decades ago when Helena still read her fan mail, Ruukku sent her an angry letter talking about how her books are highly inappropriate and she needs to stop making them this instant and be ashamed. Helena’s petty ass sent her back a long fanfic of some critters from Ruukku’s sappiest books getting gruesomely tortured to death. Of course that didn’t go well and Ruukku sent an evil angrier letter, and now they’re basically angry pen-non-pals. Helena actually looks forward to Ruukku’s letters because she thinks it’s hilarious so those are the only ones she won’t throw away. Ruukku probably knows by now that Helena won’t change, but she finds it an interesting relationship anyway. Basically writing to Helena is a guilty pleasure for her now since she has her reputation as a wholesome child friendly writer.

Yeah and her dress looks similar to Josefrollop’s robe, that’s just because he commits art theft

Obligatory bonus thingies because idk where else to put these

[balrogballs]

Esteeméd Balls of 'Rog: 2024 was my year of Thinking About Elrond. It ended with your beautiful (and beautify deranged) writing so it seems only right that I share with you that for me it started, of all things, with The Grateful Dead’s ‘Ripple’. Do you know it?

[And do please forgive the length of the rest of this message as I engage in the grand tradition of my tree hugging fish kissing pot smoking NorCal hippie people by have Far Too Much to say about the Dead *facepalm*]

Because I tell you, I heard it last spring, those opening lines, 'If my words did glow with gold of sunshine / And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung / Would you hear my voice come through the music / Would you hold it near as it were your own?' And I could think of nothing but Elrond reaching out through song to Maglor, not knowing where he could be found or if he even lived, reaching out to everyone he’d ever lost, writing a song that some might call self-indulgent noodling except that you can’t help but sing it yourself once you know it, a song meant to be passed along, to radiate out into the world, to find whoever needs to hear it.

And then we have 'It’s a hand me down, the thoughts are broken / Perhaps they’re better left unsaid / I don’t know, don’t really care / Let there be songs to fill the air' Oh, think the elves of Rivendell singing silly songs as the shadow returns, as the time of the elves fades away, think how even then songs will forever fill the air. And where better than the Last Homely House with its lord as kind of summer to wish that you 'Reach out your hand if your cup be empty / If your cup is full may it be again' and can you tell me of a better way to preserve our spirits in the face of inevitable darkness except by doing exactly that?

And then we come to you 'There is a road, no simple highway / Between the dawn and the dark of night / If you should go, no one may follow / That path is for your steps alone' Well that’s at the heart of the Gift of Men isn’t it, the winding way from birth to death and no knowing where you’ll end up when you set out on that road. Imagine a child (imagine a pair of twins) asking their ageless guardians what lies on the path of Men. Did Maedhros say something like that to Elros, wondering what fate held for those two half-elven children? Did Elrond, trying so hard not to cling too tightly even as his heart broke once again, say so to his children?

And oh, when did the words 'You who choose to lead must follow / But if you fall you fall alone' first come to him? Sure sums up an awful lot of Elven lordship. How often has Elrond turned over those two lines? How much has it shaped his approach to leadership even as he refused the crown?

And then we end on that hopeless loving wish for returning to a place that may not even exist, 'If I knew the way I would take you home' I wonder if real kindness isn’t at its heart the desire to offer a home to all those you love, all those who live, even though (because) you have no idea where to find a true home of your own anymore.

But that’s not really the end, no we still have the chorus in growing harmony singing 'La-da-da-dah, la-dah-da-da-da' a tune anyone can join, well tra-la-la-lally come back to the valley…

May the coming year be good to you. Thank you for your writing <3

This is great stuff and has managed to add more than one song to my Elrond playlist, so congratulations in multiple ways!

I am very glad you enjoyed my freaky writing and I am also obsessed with these, I love when people straight up write fic with song lyrics because frankly same (my Russingon number one song is a Sufi devotional 😇)

happy Thinking About Elrond year and wish us all many more of these ✨

[ex-vespidae]

I love Marcille dungeon meshi mainly cause I love how shes drawn so much especially with the dungeon lord outfit she's incredible. i also love how her main thing is that she's scared of losing all the people she loves because she will outlive them which feels a bit relatable especially if you're young and your thinking about your grandparents and parents and stuff...

and also shes in yuri with falin which is like .... oooihgjshsysgshavgsvscejmdbshshscyshebehej....

shes seen the horrors... also you could probably say shes just an average girl but no shes not. shes a bit crazy. a bit freaky if you will.

(i think u have to be in that dungeon.)

also did i mention the dungeon lord outfit. its so incredible and pretty and god does she look amazing when shes doing Falin's resurrection like the tattered dress covered in blood... The eyebags .... ooough

also like how most normal elves r like looking like the prettiest bitches wver like they just came out of every fashion studio but u can tell marcille is a half-elf cause she doesnt look as stereotypically pretty... also her ears aren't as pointed....

ooougdjshsgsnvegqkabstee

[dungeonenvy]

I like elves

But not Tolkien elves I like the WEIRD elves

The Divinity elves that are half plant and eat flesh to transfer memories

Space frog elves

Elves with gills and elves who are ghosts and elves who are spiders

Just all the freaky deaky elves

PoE Godlike are also *spectacular* and I'm a huge fan although I never got into PoE

Gimme the weird guys

The one you gravitate towards the first time playing any cRPGs. Included Pillars of Eternity races and Divinity Original Sin ones.

[forebodingmusicstartsplaying]

So, just because Taash's quest and that tablet in general gives me vibes, I will be betting money on either

We get a Veilguard DLC pertaining to the tablet/qunari

The next game centers or has a large focus on the qunari and their origins

The next game has a dlc that focuses on the qunari

I had this written down before I saw the secret ending.... And I still don't know what to make of that. I first thought "Titans" but they've been driven mad. Maybe it's possible it was their severed dreams, but that feels... Wrong?

Second guess was the Tevinter mages that, in the Andraste belief, blighted the golden city, but that feels like at least half a political move, to say your enemy is the cause for the literal world ending catastrophe. Also that happens after the veil and whatever they are seems to be as old or older.

It could also be something older than the elves. An ancient spirit or something, which feels the most likely. Possibly related to the old Qunari gods.

Whatever they are, they seemed to be connected to both the idol from DA2 and to Logan being a bastard in Origins.

So now that I hit upon that I will be raising my bet to: the freaky ass spirits are tied to the Qunari gods and will be very important™

[maydaymadier]

How Old Is Xenk Yendar?

hello, so I don’t think I was paying that close attention to the timeline but

- Holga says the Elk Tribe battle with the dragon cultists was a hundred years ago - BUT the last of the elks to see Xenk before handing over the helm sees him as a grown adult IN HIS CURRENT ARMOR - So I just sort of guessed that maybe he was an elf/half-elf but we have Simon and a few of the wood elves (very briefly) for comparison and Xenk doesn’t have pointy ears at all, the only unusual thing abt him is the rune on his forehead. - HOWEVER we do see with the Theyan assassins in the Underdark that they still look entirely human (they’re just goth, just some goth fellas on a mission) while being undead - The line is “It is no simple feat to kill that which is already dead” before the assassins get back up - Conclusion:

the big freaky death cloud only makes you a mindless zombie if you’re engulfed in it, otherwise exposure makes you some sort of revenant.  Therefore Xenk may actually be undead.  Maybe not on the same level/in the same way as the assassins considering he’s definitely aged.  But this has some juicy implications for being undead and how it interacts with paladin features

[dufferpuffer]

Voldemort had red eyes and freaky looks before Harry poofed him. I'm pretty sure 'dude is freaky' would've been common knowledge.

Even if the first thought wasn't "Oh shit its Voldemort" - it would be "What the fuck is going on with that guy, I don't like it" - and it wouldn't be much of a leap to realizing he was Voldemort, considering how unique he looks.

For as much body difference there is in Winzarding society, how used they are to different shapes and sizes and beings... They are still big on anthropocentrism.

Even those who get along fine with goblins, or elves, or centaur, or half-giants think somewhat poorly of them. They see a dude walking around looking like a non-human - they're gonna go through every negative stereotype they have in their heads, landing on a "???" - which might just equate to "OH FUCK ITS HIM"

So yeah - even if a kids first thought wasn't him, it would be their second or third. Pretty quick. I'd say. But having it be their FIRST thought might just save their life.

Writing my often-promised fic and I have a question for you all:

Specifically, this applies to early OotP, two weeks into school, when people have only vaguely heard that Voldemort might be back but the Daily Prophet doesn't think so. At this point, are Voldemort's physical descriptors common knowledge from the first war? If a student saw Voldemort talking to Nagini, would that student be like "HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-NAAAAMED" or like "wow creepy guy, Parselmouth, prob bad news :/"

Please add your reasoning in tags/reblogs!

[dianthus-babbles]

For an elf, he’s weird. He can’t say that aloud, of course, not with Dalish on his team, currently standing to his left with a curious grin on her face.

He’s tall, for a change. Not impossibly so and not the first he’s seen - Solas’s an example - but he catches the eye. Almost human-y, too, in the width of his shoulders and the muscles he’s seen on him a few times while bathing, provided he’s certain it’d be an offence to say that.

And maybe he’s seen shit that wasn’t there, but he could swear he’s caught glimpse of a dash of unconnected stubble on a particularly long mission, one that’s disappeared by the end of the day.

But there’s no mistaking what he is. He’s got those long, expressive ears pointing up that get flat when he’s about to shot an arrow to his target. Like now, in the training area, the longbow in his hands a curious change from the daggers he’s always seen him with. Makes his arms and shoulder look ridiculously attractive too, with the strength needed to draw it and how tiny his waist looks compared to them.

And the freaky eyes. A very big pair, too. Glad he naturally keeps them half-closed with the frowny resting bitch face he has, brows knotted in tension. It’s a shame, though - they’re a pretty green, one that’s scattered with gold and brown in the middle, a color that makes sense only on his kind’s face. And-

Dalish laughs and as he turns to face her, he feels a ghost of shame. Instinctively, he knows what she’s about to suggest. Instead, Rocky’s voice comes from his blind side, bored in his remark as if talking to the idiot friend that’s still to understand what the rest has got like a century ago.

«Keep at it, chief, and he’ll be naked by the end of his training. ‘member eating elves is racist.»

«But swallowing them isn’t.» - Stitches adds, joining them with the same untouched expression. By the way Dalish’s grin widens and they all chuckle, it must be hilarious.

«If by ten seconds you aren’t training yourselves, I’ll eat pieces of shit for dinner instead.»

They laugh, proving his point, scattering to the winds like crappy teenagers that have made the joke of their lives. The sound, however, has the Inquisitor turning, his head tilted in curiosity as he flutters those stupidly long eyelashes, fair blonde as his hair, glistening with sweat in the sunlight.

He raises a hand and greats him, to avoid looking like an ass that was talking shit about him with his men. The smile he gives him in response, however, makes him feel warm in the stomach.

Ah, Maker ... what the fuck.

[teacup-of-candlelight]

I don't think we really think enough about how much more life D&D Elves see than we do

Lets say full Elves can live to be about 1,000 if lucky. (The average lifespan is 750, but a thousand has been known to happen every now and again.) Even if we aren't giving the generous 100 year life span to us humans, the world average right now is 72.6, that means these guys living at least 10x the amount of life-time we are.

But what about the Trance?

Remember, these guys don't sleep. They just meditate, for only 4 hours everyday. Which is like, half of the recommended human hours. Imagine how much more conscious life we would live and experience if we only slept for four hours. The average human spends one third of their life (~229,961 hours) sleeping. Now Imagine cutting that in half.

Now multiply those years by 10.

It's honestly mind boggling and a little hard to imagine. I'm not great at math, so someone else feel free to jump in with some more crunchy stats here, but-- just think about the massive scope of conscious life shift we would experience only requiring four hours of meditation instead of daily sleep. Imagine the knowledge and world experience you could amass. Imagine the things you could build, could study, the people you could know, the relationships you could form.

Imagine how detached you could become watching the same patterns of life century after century after century only taking a break every four out of 24 hours. I can understand why morality could slip, why the meaning of shorter lived life forms could come into question. I can totally understand how the stereotypical attitudes of superiority could come in.

But I could also see some opposing side effects, like some elves becoming obsessed or hyper interested in humans or other shorter lived species, seeking to protect them, or to collect their creations, simply because their lives are so short.

I could imagine growing tired of pretty much only napping between long stints of consciousness for hundreds of years. How that could make someone sick of it. What about the elf that chooses to laze around and actually sleep, if he even can, or meditate for a majority of his time because he just has so much time to kill? What about the elf that wants to waste his time because he's already seen too much life?

Elves are actually super freaky, man.