#gym with ME/CFS

[compassionmattersmost]

9: Listening to Your Body: A Compassionate Approach to the Leg Press for Post-Viral ME/CFS

When living with Post-Viral ME/CFS, it’s essential to remind ourselves that our journey with exercise is not measured by how much we do, but by how gently we honor the unique rhythms of our bodies. This is especially true when it comes to engaging in physical activities like the Leg Press Machine. Today, we’ll explore how to mindfully approach this exercise in a way that supports both your…

[woahajimes]

i hate tumblr new format. alsooo whatd i miss

[peachie-kittie]

I love 'The Post-Traumatic Manifesto'

It's a small project made by the creator Weevildoing, and I've been obsessing. And considering I'm. Experiencing. I'm gonna force my love for this series onto everyone else.

Various headcanons be upon ye all:

There are two girls who could be considered "early risers" - Caliber and Irreverent. Caliber because she works a 9-5 on top of going to the gym, and Irreverent because the religious sermons co attended has influenced her sleep schedule. Co, however, prefers them nowadays to watch the sunrise :)

Also Caliber wakes up that early to either make coffee at home or splurge on fancy coffee - fancy coffee is saved for holidays, rough days, or as a littol treat. She will never admit to that third one though.

Girls with the most FUCKED sleep schedule include Splitter (to no one's surprise), Disposable, Fainant (<- hear me out-), and Caliber.

Splitter is splitter (/affect i adore her). Disposable likes to stay up late playing bideos games, watching anime, scrolling tumblr (ILL GET BACK TO THIS LATER), or researching conspiracy theories. Fainant WOULD have a normal sleep schedule in their ideal life but due to their ME/CFS and many other disabilities and chronic issues they kinda just have accepted her sleep schedule will always be a bit fucky. And Caliber, despite being an early riser is prone to working late. Go to bed at 2 and wake up at 6 kinda lady. This is why she needs coffee.

Chocobo would LOVEEE to work as a barista. Not at fuckbucks but like. If he could get paid properly and be considered a Cool Barista:tm: it'd be THRIVING.

Adding onto that; if it were a barista she'd work at the same coffee shop Caliber visits and Caliber describes him as "the sweetheart who writes nice notes on her cups and can make a killer hazelnut latte."

Splitter and Disposable are friends - semi-long distance, like an hour - and they bond over anime, games, and all the out-there shit they both like/believe (conspiracies and such). They keep each other up watching anime or gaming over discord its amazing. They also both confide in each other about violent or s/h related urges, just kinda listening and going along. They're both SEVERELY mentally ill so they dont really try to give advice; theyll just mutually acknowledge it and be like "yeah that shit sucks. ill hate it/them with you tho."

^^^everytime they meet up they spend at least 3 days together.

Chocobo and Fainant are also friends. Specifically, Chocobo loves to bake sweets for Fainant and Fainant will invite Bo over for frequent movie nights, tea parties, and general hangout sessions lot. Chocobo is one of few people Fainant will willingly go out with because he is willing to leave as soon as they say theyre getting tired.

Chocobo and Irreverent are the UNLIKELY DUO!!! Chocobo is excitable and sociable and anxious and Irreverent is aloof and a lil socially detached but a good logical counterpart who isn't as worried about what others think.

To that end, Chocobo is an age regressor (between ages 10-14 usually) - it won't do it in front of many people, but he trusts Irreverent to caregive. Co makes sure to be extra careful with Bo's boundaries during these times.

Taxidermy and Chocobo don't know eachother BUT Fainant knows Taxidermy and has been intending to introduce the two.

Taxidermy and Fainant never go out. Unlike Chocobo, Taxidermy is the friend Fainant will scroll on their phone with and occassionally send memes for hours then go out for McDonald's at 2 am.

OH ALSO. Splitter and Fainant are work buds. They work at the McDonalds mentioned above. They talk over discord and also send each other memes.

Im not sure how many of you follow Weevil on instagram but. there was a post where Bo very clearly has a crush on Disposable and honestly. Yeah.

For context, there's a skate park near the cafe - and Disposable skateboards there and practices moves on railings and shit. One time Chocobo saw Disposable successfully pull off a kickflip coming off a rail and it's heart went doki-doki.

Splitter has met Chocobo in person a total of two times - the cafe is a rare safe place for Splitter and Disposable to hang out in a dark corner - and both times she could SEE Chocobo staring.

She has tried to get Disposable to talk to him. It is VERY hesitant. Next time Splitter visits she plans to drag Disposable over to Chocobo.

Okay so anyway hard pivot back to Caliber and CHEMICAL!!

Chemical canonically loves rhythm games and fitness - what I'm saying is that she attends the same gym as Caliber and they share a Zumba class.

Whenever Caliber is there Chemical is lovingly on her ass - making sure she drinks water and always inquiring about her home life. Caliber spares details, not wanting to worry a LITERAL TEENAGER, but takes her advice to stretch and drink water.

Caliber admires Chemical's high energy and boldness - and constantly tells her to use those strengths to her advantage. Chemical doesn't seem to fully believe her but appreciates it anyway.

Chemical sees Caliber as an older sister figure for sure.

Chemical is another friend of Fainant! They don't hang out as much as Taxidermy or Chocobo but Chemical helps Fainant stay as active as they can with all their disabilities.

Same for Splitter. She got Splitter into rhythm games. They also geek out about figmas, gundams, and garage kits together.

A decent chunk of the girls deal with feelings of nonhumanity btw - not even just in a trauma way. Fully convinced Disposable is a dog therian and is trying to unlearn its inner cop.

I have more but this feels excessive. Weevil if you see this I hope they vibe. also hi i love this series sm

[hellyeahsickaf]

Abled people don't fucking get it.

You don't get to imply I'm living some kind of "forever vacation". It's perpetual pain. If you see me doing something I enjoy, it's not because it's what I'd rather be doing than being "productive". I fucking miss the gym but things like video games are just a much more accessible activity these days. I'm not "lounging", I don't get a break from the pain just that sometimes I'm able to take my mind off of it

Unemployment isn't some kind of break or excuse to not participate in society (capitalism is garbage but being disabled=/=unemployed for the hell of it). For reasons, I fell behind in school, bad. But I got myself a diploma equivalent and finally felt I'd chosen the line of work I wanted. I had connections, opportunities. I had fibro and some fatigue (unknowingly CFS as that was manageable) but I was getting PT and managing it as best I could. All I needed was to take courses and I was ready for that even with the difficulty of my then undiagnosed ADHD.

And then I got sick, really sick. Worst mono infection my doctor had ever seen due to medical neglect, Shoutout to those shitty CVS minute clinics. It made my ME/CFS so much worse, I was stuck in bed all the time before getting put on Adderall for my then newly diagnosed ADHD. Then I thought the fatigue was finally healing and a side effect of Adderall was a huge crash and wave of fatigue. No it turns out when it wore off I just felt the fatigue again lmfao

I was told I'd be better within 6 months. Okay so I can opt for the Spring semester, no big deal. 8 months go by, a year, a year and a half. I waited and waited. Hoping that "when I get better" I could be caught up with everyone else I knew my age. That was over 7 years ago. Do people think I wanted that all taken from me? To get progressively worse and worse?

Do they think loss of agency is something I enjoy? Needing help, being unable to drive, to enjoy my old hobbies, cook for myself regularly? I've been accused of enjoying this and not wanting to get better as if this hasn't put my head in very dark places. Sometimes I feel like I see a way out of this and it isn't recovery. They don't get it. I don't enjoy being heavily medicated but I know I need to be. I don't enjoy having things purchased for me because I want more financial independence. I don't enjoy feeling like a leech, actually.

It's not a vacation, it's hell. You can go on about how much more exhausted you are because you work or whatever but the thing is I don't need a job to feel what you feel after working. I feel like I worked a 12 hour shift after taking a shower on some days, no exaggeration. You can't compare your able bodied exhaustion to the effects of a chronic illness that fucks you up without you needing to work a full time job. This is my full time job and it wasn't the one I was hoping for exactly

[arctickat2400]

So Proud of You ∞ Henry Cavill

Henry Cavill x Reader

Word Count: 2,090

Warnings: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS), body insecurities, super sweet Henry fluff and comfort, repetition (apologies), horrible title (all as per usual)

Background: I have a tough time getting myself to workout. I have no support to help motivate me to do so, so I struggle. There will be times I workout for a short amount of time, a week or so, but then lose my motivation, or my energy level will plummet. So I wrote this to not only encourage me, but to also let me know, and anyone else who is struggling, that it’s okay if you’re going through things that prevent you from working out. But in this case, Henry (and Kal) are here to give us some fluffy comfort in times of distress. Enjoy!

***

It’s not often you go to work out since your CFS won’t allow it. It made doing even the simplest things extremely difficult. Even getting out of bed in the morning was a struggle. However, Henry makes your life so much easier, even just by being in it. This man is a saint. The precious teddy bear will do literally anything for you and he has been there for you since you first met. 

You watched from bed as Henry floated about the room, getting ready to go workout in his home gym. You were about to lay down and read or watch a show, your exhaustion getting the best of you and only allowing you to do the bare minimum. However, you’ve been pretty unproductive lately, no thanks to you CFS, and you felt maybe you should get up and do something, anything. You were stuck in your thoughts, your eyes continuing to follow wherever Henry would go, before he strolled up to you and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“I’ll be downstairs if you need me, sweetheart. Don’t hesitate to text me or come get me for any reason,” Henry assured you, looking straight into your eyes, his hand stroking your hair as he gently brushed his thumb over your cheek. You nodded with a small, sheepish smile, earning one from him in return before he brushed his hand down your arm and left the room, Kal following right behind him (his little workout buddy). 

An idea popped into your head and you finally made yourself get up before walking into the bathroom. You stopped short and made the mistake of looking in the mirror, not really liking what you see. You have your good, your bad, and your neutral days. Today was somehow quite neutral, although, the longer you looked in the mirror, the more negativity seeped into your mind.

You lifted your shirt, brushing your hand over the soft skin there, glaring at the extra fat that accumulated there. Your thighs were no better, and your ass had enough cellulite on it that made you want to scream on the inside. You knew having these things was completely normal, that there was nothing wrong with your body. But something in your mind ached at the sights, the little devil on your shoulder telling you to change. 

Finally coming to your conclusion, you marched your way into your walk-in closet and dug through the back of your dresser to find some workout shorts and tank top. After changing, you pulled your hair back into a simple braid, slipped on your socks and sneakers, and went downstairs to the kitchen to refill your water bottle before making your way down to the gym. 

Your mind was plagued with worries and anxieties because you were still quite tired and you felt weak. But you needed to do this, for yourself, and you were going to try your hardest. That’s all you could ever give of yourself, all anyone could ever expect of you.

Henry was doing bench presses when you walked in, his workout playlist blaring out through the speakers. Once Kal noticed you from his spot observing his father, a smile immediately came to his furry face as he stood and trotted happily over to you. You smiled as you knelt down, petting him between the ears before you made your way over to Henry, Kal walking beside you.

Henry’s face instantly brightened up with a huge smile once he laid eyes on you, a shy smile adorning your own. He sat up on the bench, careful not to hit his head on the bar, before standing up.

“Well, hello, my love! What do I owe this magnificent honor of my princess’s company?” Henry beamed enthusiastically as he met you halfway, placing his hands on either of your cheeks, leaning down to place a sweet kiss on your lips, your hands holding onto his wrists. 

“I just thought it would be a nice idea to join you. I’ve been pretty unproductive lately, and I’m not in the best mindset when it comes to my body, so I thought I’d try working out.” You shrugged, looking around to see what all you might do.

“Well, I’m very glad you’re here, darling. If you need anything at all, just let me know.” Henry smiled, making sure you had your water and pressing one more kiss to your head before going back to finish his bench presses. You began with stretching before starting on some strength exercise machines. 

You were barely into your workout, having only done one and a half rounds on a few machines when you struggled to go on. It’s been awhile since you last worked out. You were proud of yourself for pushing yourself to go. The fact that you were up and getting your body moving was great in and of itself. But the more you worked and the more tired you became, the more discouraged you felt. 

You’d just finished a set on the abdominal crunch machine when Henry had noticed you sitting there. He noticed your breathing seemed heavier than normal, Kal sitting beside you with his head on your thigh for comfort as you lean forward on your knees, your head in your hands. He gazed at you sympathetically before guiding himself over to you, kneeling down in front of you.

“Hey, sweet girl. [Are] You doing okay?” Henry asked in a gentle tone, placing a hand on your calf and brushing his thumb across your skin.

You nod slightly, guiding your eyes up to look at him. “It’s just harder than I remember,” You breathe out. You’ve been to the gym before, of course. There was even a time when you had a streak going, but of course, like everything else, it had come to an end and it was hard to get back. 

“I know, baby, but I’m so proud of you for coming in the first place,” Henry began, reaching over to take your water bottle and handing it to you, making sure you’re drinking enough. “If you’d like, I can help you get back into it. If not, that’s okay, too. I know what you’re going through is hard, but I will do everything in my power to help you in every way I can,” Henry explained to you sincerely. 

“I know, bear. Thank you,” You gave him a thankful smile, reaching up to brush your hand over his cheek. 

“Just don’t push yourself too hard, alright? You’re just starting out. It’ll take time. Just go slow and take your time. I’m almost done, then we can go shower and relax. Dinner’s on me tonight,” Henry smiled, guiding his hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. You nodded before Henry stood up, telling you to make sure you’re keeping up on your water, placed a kiss on your head, and went back to finish his workout. 

After finishing your round of sets, you welcomed the opportunity to stop your workout when you realized Henry began his post workout stretching, Kal laying down next to him. You strolled towards Henry and sat across from him on the floor. 

“How’re you doing, love?” Henry smiled knowingly, reaching his hand to you which you weakly received in your own. He knew that when you’d told him you came to workout with him that it was going to be rough on you. But he was so proud of you for coming on your own and working your hardest on your own, and he would never stop telling you exactly that, even if you weren’t going to come all the time. It meant the world to him to see you trying to stay healthy.

“I’ve been better, but I’m okay,” You chuckled, extending your leg out in front of you and bending the other to stretch your legs and back.

“Well, I know I said it earlier, but I’m still very proud of you. You did great, darling,” Henry smiled compassionately. “Which means you’re going to relax and I’m gonna take good care of you tonight.” Although Henry always takes very good care of you all the time, you welcomed the gesture and offered him a soft smile in return, reveling in the anticipation of just being in his arms. 

After your post workout stretch, you realized your legs were a bit wobbly (comes with the CFS package mixed with the workout). Henry noticed your off kilter stance after helping you stand up and picked you up in his arms as you wrapped yourself around him like a koala. He handed you your water bottle, kissing your cheek, and taking his own before walking you upstairs, Kal hot on his heels.

As Kal settled himself in the bathroom doorway, Henry settled you on the bathroom counter before walking to the shower to turn it on. He walked back to you to begin helping you take your clothes off, and, after lifting your tank top over your head, Henry placed his hands on your soft middle, brushing his thumbs over your skin.

Henry knew why you’d come to workout in the first place. He hadn’t wanted to say anything at the moment, just happy that you’d come to join him at all. But he knew it was because you wanted to change your body. However, he didn’t think there was anything that needed to be changed. Henry loves you just as you are. 

“Baby, you know that you don’t need to change, right?” Henry started, his expression serious but soft, his hands never leaving your waist and his eyes glued to yours. “I know you’re not in love with your body like I am, but you shouldn’t be straining yourself to lose weight or anything of the sort. I’m all for you trying to keep yourself healthy. I love that you came to workout with me. That is a pleasure I will always welcome,” Henry chuckled sweetly. “But, I don’t like the reason you did so. You are so gorgeous, my darling, and you don’t need to change your body. When you feel insecure about yourself, come to me and I will help you. You’re so strong, baby girl, and I know it might not always feel like it, but you will get through this. And I will be here for you, always,” Henry finished with an eskimo kiss.

You just nodded, looking down at your twiddling fingers, not having the words to express how he makes you feel so loved and cared for. Placing his finger under your chin, Henry lifted your gaze to his before leaning in and sweetly kissing your lips.

Taking your bra off, Henry took your hands in his as you slid off the counter and knelt down to help you take off your shorts. Before standing, though, Henry placed kisses randomly across your tummy, moving down to your waist, and gently kissing the inside of your thighs and the stretch marks that adorn your skin. You tangle your fingers into his hair as he looks up at you.

“So exquisite,” Henry states adoringly, standing to his full height, taking your face in his hands and kissing your lips passionately.

Henry undressed before leading you into the shower. He stayed true to his word to take care of you, washing both your hair and body, making sure to take extra care of the parts your struggled with most, before washing himself.

Stepping out and wrapping a towel around his waist, Henry held your towel out for you to step into. You followed him to your closet as he chose comfy clothes for you both to relax in: one of his hoodies, yoga pants, and a pair of underwear for you, a hoodie, sweatpants, and a pair of boxers for himself. 

Once going downstairs, hand in hand, you fed Kal his dinner while Henry started on your dinner. The rest of the night was just you, Henry, and Kal cuddled up on the couch watching a movie before your eyes became heavy and finally close. With your head on Henry’s chest, your legs over his that were propped up on the coffee table, his fingers stroking through your hair, his other hand placed gently on your thigh, he noticed your sleepy state.

“Sweet dreams, my love. I’ve got you and I’m never letting go,” Henry whispers warmly, closing his eyes and kissing your head, holding you tight against his body to keep his precious angel safe. 

[kyriat-sims]

Update of most of my BB stuff - now includes heirloom option!

I really enjoyed the heirloom option that came with the patch update for the Life & Death EP a while ago. Which legacy players doesn't? 😁 At the same time, I strongly disliked that my older cc didn't have that option, so I just had to do something about it. That means an update of more or less all my BB cc. Some EA items (like appliances and counters) does not have heirloom enabled, and neither will mine have.

I have also done a general tag-update to bring the items up to date with the newest packs. If you need links to updated sets see this blog post, but my cc is also available on Patreon and CurseForge. If you want the heirloom option, please re-download and replace the following items/sets.

Ancient Vet set

Doro Lillies for the floor (Simblreen 22)

Drum drum drum

Gustav Borgen Children portraits

Hercules gym set

Hymenaios set

Manthos Dart (Flying Arrows)

Manthos Lekanh Sink

Manthos Lykeion set

Manthos Palace BB set 1

Manthos Palace BB set 2

Manthos Theatre set A

Manthos Theatre set B

Modern Art (not CF)

Paixnidi playmat

Parmenidh Library set

Petroglyphs part 1 Animals

Petroglyphs part 2 Tools

Petroglyphs part 3 Symbols

Pots and Pieces set

Prayer house pictures

Pseftia Books and Tv set

Small botanical drawings on the shelf

Small botanical drawings on the wall

Tell-me-a-story mini set

Trash & Garbage! (not CF)

Valdres dining table

Zakros bedroom set

Zakros livingroom set

If you miss something, or have questions, please don't hesitate to send me an ask!

Happy simming! 💕 

[homerjacksons]

Going on a rant below cut lmao

I hate when google is largely unhelpful and reddit is judgey cos those are my two go-to’s for advice on A LOT of issues from tech to personal.

But ugh my quad muscles are so weak and sore after a hike on Saturday that I can barely stand. And I know the second day is usually worse than the first day from when I used to go to the gym but this is the worst I’ve ever been

And all reddit gave me in response to some dude in the same situation is snark about how you shouldn’t start with such a difficult hike, you shouldn’t do something like that unprepared, etc etc. And even google’s giving me “prevention tips” (on top of rest and hydration which SIGH yes obviously but it just took me 4 tries to stand out of bed to go to the toilet lmao I guess there’s no better “remedy”)

And I’m like IF I HAD KNOWN THE HIKE WAS THAT DIFFICULT I WOULD NOT HAVE DONE IT! It was lovely and it did remind me how much I miss hiking (I used to go regularly before my CFS got as bad as it is) but jesus christ i haven’t done anything more strenuous than a set of stairs or two in over 2 years. The hike was sold to me as “more like a bush walk with a bit of a hike at the end” and it was definitely not that lmao. It was literally a near constant descent for half then a constant rise for half, 6.5kms total. I am in PAIN and I was UNPREPARED.

And also while I’m ranting cos it’s fucking 4:30am and I’m lying in bed and I can still smell last nights roast dinner cos no one thought to open a window bc I am the only person who does these things and I’m so tired of it 😭 it doesn’t help that I am, in general, exhausted and in pain. But god I am tired of being the only one who does shit properly.

And I’m looking at dad not mum obviously cos my mum’s disabled

But like I wanted a bath last night and normally I’m wanting a bath cos I’m in pain from CFS and I ask dad to clean it for me before I go in. I didn’t ask him to last night cos he’d already made dinner and was doing the dishes which is meant to be my job when he cooks. I can wipe down a bath myself. Yeah no that bath needs a fucking serious scrub and dad’s clearly ONLY been wiping it down for literal years, probably ever since mum got too sick to clean. It’s got spa jets, it needs proper cleaning 💀

So then I figured I’d get the broom I’d bought to scrub the bathroom/shower floor to avoid getting on hands and knees which always exhausts me more only to find that dad’s used that broom FOR SWEEPING despite me explicitly telling him not to use it cos it needed to stay hair/dust free to remain a scrub brush.

And my quads are way too fucked for me to crouch/bend the way I needed to to scrub it with a little hand brush

And when I told him he needs to buy me a new heavy duty broom bc he’s fucked mine he just thought it was amusing that I was annoyed??? And did NOTHING in the way of offering to help.

Anyway I’m exhausted and sore and in such a foul mood that I’d hoped sleep would help but I’ve woken up even more cranky 😅😅😅

[rollingblakely]

Hey there, welcome to the chaos. ✨I'm disabled, chronically ill, neurodivergent, and proudly intersex—and if you're any of those things too, I hope you feel seen here. 🫶🏻

Dynamic As Hell 😎

I'm an incomplete paraplegic with dynamic disabilities-meaning some days I can pivot off a foot with assistance, and other days I can't scoot myself up on the couch because my arms are like "bestie no." | use a manual chair with power assist when I can and a power chair when I can't. (Shoutout to my Quantum Edge 3-coming soon to a hallway near me.)

My very unsexy but educational medical resume:

Congenital Myasthenic Syndrome (CMS): A rare neuromuscular disorder where my muscles and nerves straight up ghost each other, causing muscle weakness, loss of sensation, fatigue and joint subluxations (my joints out here freelancing).

Glycogen Storage Disease: My body stores energy like a toxic ex- inefficiently and with long-term consequences.

Dysautonomia (IST): My heart rate is the only thing about me that knows how to hustle.

Also living with: ME/CFS, cluster headaches (ow), fibromyalgia, incontinence (fun!), Hashimoto's, skeletal abnormalities in my spine (lost the genetic lottery) and chronic pain so consistent it's basically a roommate.

Intersex + Gender Is A Journey, Baby! 😮‍💨

I'm intersex and nonbinary, a proud blend of both. l've had male characteristics since I was 9, and when I got my medical records as an adult, I learned my original birth certificate just said "O." I don't fit in any binary box-so I don't try to. I'm both. I'm neither. I'm a little beard, a little glitter, and a lot of "what gender feels correct today?" I never know if I'm gonna wake up feeling like a glam queen or an Adam Sandler character. Either way, I always slay. 😉

Raw Dogging Mental Health:

I'm healing out loud after a childhood of abuse that started at 9 that contributed to my C-PTSD, ADHD, OCD, autism spectrum disorder, and agoraphobia.

I can't take SSRIs, atypical antidepressants, or antipsychotics due to my conditions and genetics-so l'm rawdogging my mental health journey and somehow thriving anyway?!? 👀

I'm at the gym 3-4x a week (yes, even in a wheelchair-accessibility is radical), exposure therapy, shadow work, and finding the delicate balance between respecting my body's limits and pushing through executive dysfunction. I’m unlearning all the cruel ways of thinking my parents taught me growing up, and learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Some days the healing looks like deep inner work. Some days look like watching reality TV and crocheting until mv hands cramp.

It's messy. It's magical. It's all mine.

Breaking News: There’s No “Bad” Foods After All.

I'm healing my relationship with food. After years of chaos and a major health crash last year, I've lost 80 lbs total-12 of those since getting back on track. Now that my partner is my legal caregiver, l've got the support I need, and my body finally feels like it's starting to work with me, not just against me. I'm not chasing thinness-I'm chasing peace when I make a meal or shop for groceries.

My Little Joys

• Crochet: If it's practical, chunky, or a granny square, l'm in. Currently obsessed with amigurumi but forever starting five new projects before finishing one.

• Reality TV: Yes, I watch 1000lb Sisters, Teen Mom, and Sister Wives. No, I will not apologize. The tea is PIPING. ☕️🐸

• Financial Literacy: My partner and I watch Caleb Hammer while eating dinner. We paid off $10k in debt last year, and now that I have been approved for SSDI I'm able to support myself for the first time in years-and it feels so damn good.

• Art + Gaming: I love painting, drawing, and chill cozy games on the Switch (Paleo Pines, Cozy Garden, anything where I can grow fake plants and pet fake cows).

• Music: Raised by my grandparents = 60s-80s classics. Mom gave me 90s-2000s R&B/pop. Godfather gave me Latin music. Stepdad gave me Bob Marley. Theater kid brain gave me musicals. If I'm conscious, music is playing.

✨ He/They Pronouns ✨

✨ 27 ✨

This space is for disabled joy, queer magic, healing energy, and a lot of chaos. Hope you’re hungry, cause baby I’m serving. 💖

[donjuaninhell]

I read a few pieces recently that featured doctors who developed ME/CFS type Long Covid, and I genuinely feel bad for them because it majorly sucks to never wake up feeling rested even after sleeping twelve or more hours, and always being in pain, and having weird symptoms and issues. It's hard to live your life when the smallest things are exhausting. I threw out a bunch of old crap that was in the back room yesterday because we'd like to clean back there and use the space for storage, and the twenty minutes spent dragging everything outside to the trash left me drenched in sweat and immobile on the couch for hours. My entire body aches and feels weak today as if I overdid it at the gym squatting 300lbs and then ran a marathon. I often feel like I'm 86 years old, hell even my memory is shot to hell. So they've got my sympathy, but there's also this element of "See? See? I told you! I fucking told you dude! I'm not just depressed or making it up! I fucking told you that there was something wrong! Why would I be making this up? What could I possibly be getting out of this?" as I read about them speedrunning complete disillusionment with the medical system as they find it difficult to convince their colleagues that they're not malingering or as they're ping-ponged between different specialists who tell them to lose weight or go on antidepressants or that their test results are all normal. Of course the tragedy is that these doctors then lose their jobs and fall out of practicing medicine because they're simply too ill, so there's no internal push to reform how chronic illness is treated so nothing ever changes and we're all still stuck in hell.

[deadlifts-and-deadlines]

I ended up taking CF class yesterday, and it was a big class because it was back squat day. Anytime I am working out in a big class I let everyone else choose their equipment first and just pick from what is left, because members are paying to be there so IMO, they deserve first pick of everything during class.

But this is what I was left with plate wise, for my last set. I was trying to do 93# (a 10# jump from 83#) so I grabbed… a 10# bumper and four 2.5# change plates. To jump 10#. I am SO dumb sometimes 🤣

[compassionmattersmost]

10: Embracing Your Own Pace: The Conclusion of Our Post-Viral ME/CFS Exercise Journey

Dear Friends, As we come to the conclusion of this series on exercising with post-viral ME/CFS, I want to offer you a heartfelt reflection on the journey we’ve been exploring together. It’s been a path of discovery, patience, and above all, compassion—compassion for yourself, your body, and your unique experience with ME/CFS. We’ve discussed everything from imagining workouts while lying in…

[taegularities]

Cf and cmi jks, does your oc’s ever get needy in the middle of the night when you’re sleeping and they wake you up and they’re like “babe. Right now pls need u 🥺”

C&F Jungkook: "She's a little more tired with the children around now, so she mostly sleeps like a rock. There are days when she is particularly needy, but recently... I just let her rest. We do enjoy ourselves plenty still, don't misunderstand!"

CMI Jungkook, laughs: "Oh yeah, angel is... phew. Not always and necessarily in the middle of the night; she's pretty random. Like, when we wake up at the same time and can't sleep or when I'm gaming or painting. She's very bold when it comes to this."

CMI OC: "I'm not that bad!"

CMI Jungkook: "No? Remind me. So yesterday, you didn't call me, so you could beg me to come home from the gym earlier just to then tell me to take you on the table right the fuck now?"

CMI OC, shrugging with a sly smirk: "Well. And you did."

C&F Jungkook: "Am I intruding or?"

[she-is-ovarit]

It's been over 10 years, but one of the most motivational things I have heard was during high school. My friend had mentioned he just began working out. I said something along the lines of, "I always think about working out but it takes awhile for anything to actually happen."

And he very simply responded with, "Why? I feel it physically right now and it's been three days."

I don't know why that was so perspective-shifting to me but I think of him whenever I'm done working out now.

It's because of that small exchange that on days where I severely lack motivation or am edging into or just out of a CFS/ME episode I still just show up at the gym just to physically be in that space even if I don't exercise. I feel the effect of just existing in that space in gym clothes and continuing the routine of being present there. I stay 5 minutes and listen to a song or part of a podcast and leave. Sometimes I just stretch and leave. Sometimes, if it's just an unmotivating day and I am not in a PEM episode and am physiologically able to exercise, it becomes me getting hyped and I surprise myself by being there for 45 minutes.

The goal for me is often to just be present. Sometimes I meet it. Sometimes I'm not physically able to achieve that goal and the goal becomes respecting my physical limits. I might not be able to get out of bed to even change clothes. That is part of the process, there is a limit that I don't exceed. I take it easy. Other times I exceed the goal of just showing up and do more. All because my way too honest autistic buddy in high school challenged my thinking by pointing out you can feel the effects and influences immediately, and I applied that not just to exercise itself but the process that supports it to occur either right then or in the future.

[emptyingmybrainout]

Begging the universe to show me a path to a muscler lesbian who wants to carry me from the gym to the car

(I have CFS and my legs are not working, luckily I got a free protein shake)

(Strong lesbians save me help)

[dertaglichedan]

Assassination Porn and the Sickness on the Left

If we were leftists and we were to use leftist tropes to editorialize the recent attempt on Trump’s life, then we would frame the assassination attempt in the following way:

We have witnessed for years blatant exceptions to the once common custom that we don’t normalize the imagined killing of any president or presidential candidate and thus lower the bar of violence.

But the Left constantly makes Trump an exception. Now, it as if the imagined killing of Trump had been mainstreamed and become acceptable in a way inconceivable of other presidents.

(Do we remember the rodeo clown who merely wore an Obama mask during a bull riding contest and was punished by being permanently banned by the Missouri State Fair authorities?)

So since at least 2016 there has been a parlor game among Leftist celebrities and entertainers joking (one hopes), dreaming, imagining, and just talking about the various and graphic ways they would like to assassinate or seriously injure Trump:

By slugging his face (Robert De Niro), by decapitation (Kathy Griffin, Marilyn Manson), by stabbing (Shakespeare in the Park), by clubbing (Mickey Rourke), by shooting ( Snoop Dogg), by poisoning (Anthony Bourdain), by bounty killing (George Lopez), by carrion eating his corpse (Pearl Jam), by suffocating (Larry Whilmore), by blowing him up (Madonna, Moby), by throwing him over a cliff (Rosie O’Donnell), just by generic “killing” him (Johnny Depp, Big Sean), or by martyring him (Reid Hoffman: “Yeah, I wish I had made him an actual martyr.”).

Or should we deplore the use of telescopic scope imagery, given that the Left blamed Sarah Palin for once using bullseye spots on an election map of opposition congressional districts, claiming that such usage had incited the mass shooting by Jared Lee Loughner?

Yet, recently POTUS Joe Biden was a little bit more graphic and a lot more literal.

In a widely reported call to hundreds of donors last week, Biden boasted, “I have one job, and that’s to beat Donald Trump. I’m absolutely certain I’m the best person to be able to do that. So, we’re done talking about the debate, it’s time to put Trump in a bullseye.”

"In a bullseye?”

At least, Biden did not go back to the full Biden beat-up porn of the past (e.g., “If we were in high school, I’d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him"/ “The press always asks me, ‘Don’t I wish I were debating him?’ No, I wish we were in high school – I could take him behind the gym. That’s what I wish.”).

Then there is the question of the Secret Service and one’s political opponents. Given the tragic history of the Kennedys, why in the world did the Biden administration not insist that third-party candidate Robert Kennedy, Jr. be accorded Secret Service protection? Because his candidacy was felt to be disadvantageous to Biden?

And why just this April would the former head of the January 6th Committee and 2004 election obstructionist Rep. Bennie Thompson (D-Miss.) introduce legislation ridiculously entitled, “Denying Infinite Security and Government Resources Allocated toward Convicted and Extremely Dishonorable (DISGRACED) Former Protectees Act” to strip away Secret Service protection for former President Trump and by this April current leading presidential candidate?

Had Thompson’s bill passed, would that not have been confirmation for a potential shooter to feel his task was just made much easier?

But in a wider sense, if the common referent day after day on the Left is that Trump is another Hitler (cf. a recent The New Republic cover where Trump is literally photoshopped as Hitler), then it seems reckless not to imagine an unhinged or young shootist believing that by taking out somewhat identical to one of the greatest mass murderers in history, he would be applauded for his violence?

So is their logic, shoot Trump and save six million from the gas chambers?

After all, The New Republic defiantly explained their Hitler-Trump cover photo this way, "Today, we at The New Republic think we can spend this election year in one of two ways. We can spend it debating whether Trump meets the nine or 17 points that define fascism. Or we can spend it saying, “He’s damn close enough, and we’d better fight.”

Well, New Republic, recently someone took you up on your argument that Trump was “damn close enough” to Hitler and so he likewise chose to “fight”— albeit with a semi-automatic rifle.

If ad nauseam, a Joy Reid is screaming about Trump as a Hitlerian dictator ("Then let me know who I got to vote for to keep Hitler out of the White House”) or Rachel Maddow is bloviating about studying Hitler to understand Trump, then finally the message sinks in that a mass murderer is about to take power—unless....

Finally, the idea, if true, that bystanders spotted a 20-year-old on a nearby roof with a gun, a mere 130 yards from Trump, and in vain warned police of his presence, is surreal.

Is it all that hard for the Secret Service to post a few agents on the tops of a few surrounding buildings closest to the dais, or at least coordinate with local law enforcement to do the same?

That is a no brainer. Whoever made the decisions concerning the proper secret service security details for presidential events should be immediately fired.

[creations-by-chaosfay]

A couple folks have asked about why I won't work arts and crafts fairs, sewing as they're especially popular this time of year.

Here's the list why:

Covid - Husband and I both wear masks, but most people do not. We're both high risk and have contracted this deadly disease once, and still deal with the longterm effects. Oh, covid is the leading cause of death now here the US. Getting people to use hand sanitizer before touching anything is also a major issue. It's like dealing with toddlers. Now, before covid...

Scented items - everyone seems to use horrific artifical fragrances on their holiday items. I tried working an arts and crafts holiday fair about 12 years ago. In just half an hour, I was dealing with a really bad asthma attack. The "zero refund" policy was waived so we could get refund on paying for the vendor space. Because I nearly died.

Sensory nightmare - A&CFs tend to take place in auditoriums and school gyms. Lots of echoing and no soft surfaces (like carpeting) to absorb thr noise. The lighting hurts my eyes and tends to flicker because fluorescent lights are like that. I end up needing frequent breaks. Don't get me started on the odors, namely body odor. These places smell like sweaty teenagers who refuse to wear deodorant and instead marinate in body spray (scented rubbing alcohol) by Bath & Body Works. It's bad.

Permit/license - In Oregon, I'm required have a license or permit to be a vendor. You need these for garage/yard sales too, and those are free. Street vendor permits are free, but if vendoring indoors? It's not. I'm Disabled and that can complicate things. I can't be a street vendor, like at a farmers market, because of sensory nightmare and the heat. Even with a tent to keep thr sun out, I will not be okay.

Fabric absorbs odors - all that stink will need to be washed outta the fabric. That means a trip to the laundromat immediately after an event because I cannot pack these things away before washing. That's expensive.

Exhaustion - On top of this, we will be exhausted. That's a problem we acquired from covid: we exhaust easily, especially me. I can walk nearly a mile now, but it's taken a year to recover this much. That's just walking. There's all the talking and the social masking I need to do because of my autism and adhd, and dealing with the sensory nightmare. Then setup and repacking everything.

It's simply not worth it. Especially considering folks will balk at the prices and argue that I need to lower them to what they consider "reasonable" because apparently they can find these quilts at Walmart. Dealing with them is a special kind of Hell I never wanna deal with again.

Please stop suggesting I work at these events.