#was told my med manager was moving to a new place and i would get a call confirming it. never got a call. called them and got sent to the ->

[lycanwlf]

i am so tired of trying to set up appointments and getting sent to voicemail hell.

[dannyphantom-zero]

Doctor Danny: First official chapter

The busy hospital was on its last leg. Nurses and interns were scattered, running around like mice.

Sounds of trauma care patients and emergency care patients alarms were constantly ringing.

In the midst of it all, one calm collected doctor cared tenderly for each patient.

He, was Danny Fenton, who used to be known for having two crazy ghost enthusiasts for parents. He still loved his parents despite how hard it was growing up as half ghost.

Jazz had told them a long time ago and they had ignored it for the most part. Like that side of him didn't exist.

It had hurt at the time but Danny had managed to move past it. After successfully securing his position as ghost king (on accident) he put his newfound authority to good use making the ghosts swear a vow to behave.

A ghost vow is a big deal, which is why Danny swore a vow in return acknowledging them, if ever a ghost were in danger he would help them.

After the lack of ghost attacks Danny found he had next to nothing to do. His only hobby outside of playing video games had been ghost fighting. He hadn't realized how used to it he had gotten.

Danny hadn't even picked the college he wanted to go to yet.

Danny approached the Nasty Burger, his last refuge.

That's when he noticed a man who seemed a little out of it. The man stumbled making Danny wonder if he was drunk.

Danny turned to go inside when the man collapsed. Danny rushed over to the man and rolled him on his back. He checked for a pulse but couldn't find one.

Of course he wasn't exactly medically trained.

Danny dialed nine-one-one and started to perform CPR as best he could.

He explained to the operator clearly the situation and the ambulance came in no time.

Later that night Danny was processing the events in his head and instead of feeling scared or nervous he felt excited.

He was thrilled to have something to get his blood pumping again. Which is why he applied for med school. He studied hard, using all the time he had to memorize all the medical information that he could.

After graduation he interned at Amity Parks local hospital before moving up his position to resident.

Only a week after getting his new position he was forced to leave the hospital. It was closing because of a lack of funding.

"Please sir! What about the staff or the patients?"

The head of the medical board shook his head.

"Dr. Fenton, this hospital runs on little to nothing to begin with, we are lucky to have even made it this far. The patients will be transfered and the staff, relocated"

Danny furrowed his brows in concern.

"Don't worry Dr. Fenton, your quite literally the best we've seen walk these halls, your sure to get a good recommendation"

Danny clenched his fist.

"What are my options?" He asked.

The board looked at his sheet, flipping several until he found the right one on his clipboard.

"You said you wanted to work at a busy hospital right?"

Danny nodded yes.

"There aren't too many around here, the busiest hospital I can think of belongs to a crime ridden city a bit far  from here." He said.

"Gotham City"

Danny's breath hitched. He had heard about Gotham before. It was notorious for its villains.

Despite that, it was alluring.

"There! Send me to Gothams hospital!" He said suddenly and eagerly.

"Okay, if you say so. Do us all a favor and survive alright"

Danny laughed, "sure, I'll do my best. No promises though"

Just like that Danny packed up moved to Gotham.

He had little time to research Gotham before hand but he had heard several mutters in passing of a place called Crime Alley, a strange nickname for sure.

Danny was sure that this place would either be completely clean due to police intervention or incredibly overrun.

Danny signed a lease at the Shirley Apartments.

"Are you sure about this young man" the desk lady asked him.

He smiled kindly.

"Yes I am, I've heard the rumors and have weighed the risk. In the end it might be helpful to know just how my patients love to receive the injuries they do"

The lady sighed.

"That's right, you said your a doctor. Be careful out there, any talent in Gotham is either warped by a villain or destroyed"

Danny was a little startled by the warning, apparently there was even more to Gotham than he knew.

"I'm sorry I forgot to ask for your name"

"Didn't give one, in Gotham it's best to remain anonymous"

Danny blinked a little surprised.

"It's that dangerous, well I'll take your word for it then, thank you miss" he said as he took the key from her.

He had been able to store the old car his dad had given to him in a locked garage. He wasn't sure how well it would hold up but there was only so much he could do against humans.

Ghost powers had little, of any, effect on humans when it came to offense. Defensively they were pretty great to have.

He had only brought five boxes with him, no furniture. Back in Amity he had been busy studying and had brushed aside buying furniture.

Unfortunately that meant he had no bed.

Danny was glad to have found a beaten up wardrobe. It was missing it's doors and was leaning to the side, even so Danny was able to fix it and hang his clothes up in it.

He grabbed one of the boxes and smiled warmly when he saw a Fenton Emergency pack inside.

His mom must've stuffed it there when he was looking, lucky for him it had a sleeping bag.

An air mattress would've been nice too, but it's the thought that counts.

Danny safely stored his two favorite pictures. One of him with his family and one with his friends.

They were hidden just in case someone decided to break in, not that there would be much to find anyway but it never hurt to be careful.

Danny went to sleep soon after despite the sounds of the city.

Danny woke up feeling refreshed. He grabbed his bags and hopped in his car.

Danny hadn't realized how busy Gothams hospital actually was. Danny pulled into Gotham General and as soon as he was in his scrubs and coat he was dragged into the frey.

"We need a doctor over here!" Someone called just as Danny had finished with a patient.

Despite having to run around all day Danny wasn't tired, his ghost half supplied him energy after his human side ran dry.

All in all Danny first day on the job was hectic and he had worked for fourteen hours.

Once he was back in his apartment Danny set up a table that he had pre ordered online.

Then he got to work. According to his knowledge, most of his patients had suffered from some kind of attack or other.

Most of the heavy hitters were villains named Joker, Penguin and two face.

The riddler was taken care of, Poison Ivy had been rehabilitated and Harley Quinn had broken free from Jokers choke hold on her.

There was also the less obvious villains, like the business man lex Luther.

Lex Luther was shady at best, while no one could get hard evidence on him most people knew to be wary.

But just being informed didn't stop them from falling into his traps.

Lately Bruce had done official business with Lex Luther, which made him a suspicious person whom Danny had decided to keep tabs on, he was wary of the rich and for good reasons.

The cork board above Danny table has a litter of documents and pictured pined by red string. The players who were out of the game were crossed off.

Then there were the vigilantes. A few of them had been known to be rough, a necessary violence.

Still they seemed to have little awareness of what their little battles did to other people. Because many people came in for minor injuries due to being caught in the crossfire.

Which meant Danny had to find a way to keep everybody in line so patients would decrease in number. Danny let himself sleep for four hours before returning to the hospital.

"Oh my gosh, Doctor Fenton is still here" one nurse whispered. It had been a full day and half, Danny was running on his ghost half that seemed to keep replenishing itself due to the toxic air of Gotham. A positive side effect.

"How does he never get tired?"

"Maybe he's superhuman" one girl cracked. They noticed as he rushed by them to get to another patient.

"He's quite handsome too" one said wistfully, "but who wants a husband that works all the time"

Danny noticed the next patient seemed tense and he kept screaming for his daughter.

Danny whispered in the man's ear and put a hand on his forehead. He had used a ghost technique he learned from Nocturne and the man calmed down.

The other doctors were impressed as they worked to care for the man's injuries.

Finally the head of the unit noticed Danny and after reviewing his chart had forced him to go home.

"I don't feel fatigued at all sir, I promise I am not compromised. I can care for the patients"

The head wasn't having any of it.

"Above all your health is just as important as the patients we care for. For them to get healthy, you have to be healthy. Go home Dr.Fenton, you can come back after you get at least ten hours of sleep."

Danny wanted to argue but he knew the head was right.

"Yes sir" he said before changing into civilian clothes and leaving the hospital.

Now that he was out of a hospital setting things like hunger started to appear.

Maybe he had been to focused to notice how hungry he had been.

Danny blearily noticed a fast food place. His instincts told him the food would be greasy and way too unhealthy.

Mmm, comfort food.

The nostalgia fought with his doctoral instincts and won. All Danny wanted was to sit in a booth and eat some greasy food.

Danny ordered the double cheeseburger with bacon with a side of ten pieces chicken nuggets and large order of fries.

Waiting, even for five minutes, was starting to make Danny ravenous. As soon as he got his food he sat down and started gorging himself.

It was pretty good food for a little fast food place in the world's worst city.

Danny liked the tenderness and crispiness of the burger, the cheese was melted just right too.

Danny dipped his nuggets in sweet n' sour sauce while fighting the urge to kick his legs like a happy little kid.

As Danny left the restraint he saw an alert on his phone for a villain attack and rushed to the scene.

To his satisfaction the culprits were already being hauled away in police custody. They were just small fries, not of them appeared connected to a big player, so Danny was free to shut them out of his mind.

Which is exactly what he did. Danny drove back to his apartment and let out a sigh of relief.

That's when he noticed his door was slightly ajar.

His guard was up immediately. Danny stepped inside cautiously. He was relieved when everything appeared untouched but the scare had sent him a trip to get stronger locks.

On his way back to his car from the store he heard sound of a glass bottle breaking in a nearby alley. It was small alley, from what Danny could tell it was also a dead end alley.

Taking a risk Danny stepped in and chills went down his spine when he heard labored breathing.

Danny rushed over and froze at what he saw.

[witchygagirlwrites]

Clover-Part 1

Jay Halstead x Reader (nicknamed Clover)

When all else fails run to Jay

Mentions of sex and crooked land deals?

“No no no no” you groaned as you paced out in front of Gaffney. You couldn’t believe this. Your freaking landlord had sold the building. Everyone was getting evicted and had seventy two hours to get out. What the hell were you supposed to do?

“Clover?” Will stopped on his way past you and raised an eyebrow “What’s wrong?” you shrugged “Oh nothing, I’m just effectively fucking homeless” “Huh?” he asked and you waved a hand “Oh you know, shady developers. Money, meaning more than human lives and it not mattering that I’m a freaking trauma nurse that barely has time to breathe let alone find a new place!” 

“How long do you have to get out?” he asked and you nearly teared up “Seventy two hours” he whistled low “Ok, well me and Nat have a storage unit you’re welcome to” you nodded “That helps with that sort of stuff but where the hell am I supposed to live?” he shrugged “Jay has a spare bedroom?” “And I’m supposed to what exactly? Say hey buddy? How’s it going? Can I move in?”

He crossed his arms “Well you can do that or see if the shelter has bed” you groaned and hit Jay’s number, glaring at Will as you did. Jay answered on the second ring. “Hey Clover, how’s my favorite nurse?”

“Wondering if there was anyway possible I could maybe buy you lunch?” you asked and he whistled low “Before I agree how bad is it?” “How bad is what?” you laughed. He scoffed “I just want to know if I’m cashing in little favors with Voight or huge favors” “No favors with Voight at all actually and thanks so much for the confidence in me” he laughed “In that case, meet you at one?” “Ok, see you then” you hung up and Will nodded “He’ll more than likely agree”

You and Jay had been friends for years. You met right after he graduated from the academy because you’d started at med around the same time. You’d patched him up more times than you cared to ever admit. He was your best friend. If there was anyone on the face of this earth that knew damn near everything about you? It was Jay Halstead. You just wished you didn’t have to ask this of him but everyone else you knew either was leasing themselves or only had one bedrooms.

____________________

You sat in the corner booth of the diner you and Jay always grabbed lunch at. When he walked in you waved at him and he smiled before walking over and sliding in across from you “Well I see no marks, I’m not killing anyone. I ran your name, you’ve gotten into no trouble the last few days and not told me so what’s up princess?” you rolled your eyes at the nickname “I need a huge favor” 

He nodded slowly “How huge?” you swallowed hard “Would you be willing to rent me your spare bedroom until I can find a new place or possibly longer if I can't find a new place? My entire building is getting evicted in seventy two hours”

“What? How did those bastards manage that?” he asked and you shrugged “Shady deals, shadier lawyers?” he shook his head, jaw tense “That’s bullshit but yeah..don’t worry about it. We’ll talk about splitting bills and all. I’ll grab Kev and Adam. We’ll help you get your stuff moved” 

“Thank you Jay. I can not thank you enough” you whispered and he grinned “Hey, we’ve been friends for years Clover, I’m not exactly gonna leave you out in the street” you laughed “I appreciate it either way”

“Is that everything?” Will asked as you stacked the last box into his storage unit. You nodded “Yeah, I mean I didn’t really have too much to begin with. Perks of not being a very materialistic person” he laughed “Guess it comes in handy”

You nodded “I’ve put in calls to a couple real estate companies. I don’t want to intrude on Jay any longer than necessary” “I don’t think he’d offer if he minded” he replied and you shrugged “I know but still. I don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea and giving him a hard time you know? Plus I don’t want to fuck up his dating life. Hard as hell to take a woman home if you get there and I’m making coffee at two in the morning because I can’t sleep”

He laughed “Ok, you do have a point there” you grinned “See” then hugged him “Thank Nat for me too?” “Of course”

_____________________

You walked out of the storage unit and waved to Will before walking to your car. Jay had already given you a key to his place. It was a little weird but it wasn’t like you hadn’t slept at Jay’s before out of necessity and it wasn’t like now wasn’t out of MAJOR necessity.

You climbed in and turned the engine before heading back to Jay’s. He was at work but would be off in an hour or two. He’d be home about an hour before you’d have to go in, at least with your schedules it wasn’t like you’d be on top of each other.

“How’s my brother as a roommate?” Will asked as the two of you stood in line at the coffee kiosk. You shrugged “Actually? A pretty damn good one. He starts coffee for me, takes out the trash after dark. Calls me if he stops at the store to see if I need anything picked up. We split all the bills coming in fifty/fifty. It’s going pretty good. Which is good considering it looks like there are no places to lease within my budget in Chicago”

He nodded “Good to know. Any issues on the worried about messing up his dating life?” you shrugged “Guessing he goes to their place?” he laughed “Sounds like it’s working good and you’re not homeless. I call that a win for everyone involved”

Jay was nothing short of exhausted. The case had kicked everyone’s ass. He just wanted to crash for a while. He unlocked the door and walked into the apartment. The moment he stepped in a laugh fell from his lips. You were in the kitchen, making coffee. The laughter had come from the fact that you were wearing chucky pjs and rainbow socks. 

“Coffee?” you asked with a little smile. “Sure” he replied, dropping his keys on the table next to the door then stripping his jacket off and kicking his shoes off. You pulled down a second mug and poured him a cup. He walked over and took it from you. You turned and hopped up on the counter “You ok?”

“That case finally closed” you nodded slowly “That’s good. You’ve been having bad nightmares the last week” he raised an eyebrow “You can hear me?” you shrugged “Light sleeper. I’m just glad you haven’t brought anyone home. I would need ear plugs” 

He barked out a laugh “I promise I wouldn’t do that to you” you shrugged “Your place” he nodded “Your place too” you shrugged “True but that’s just weird bringing a man into my male best friend’s home” 

He shook his head and nodded to the couch “Want to watch that episode or did you cheat?” you gasped “I did no such of a thing” and hopped off the counter “Come on” he followed you with a smile. 

This whole roommate thing he honestly hadn’t been too sure of when he agreed to it but so far it was working out pretty well. You and him got along good. You shared quarters well. He didn't feel out of place sharing somewhere to live with you. It felt almost too natural. If you did find somewhere else to go, he would more than likely miss you like crazy by now and it hadn't been but a few weeks.

Part 2

[fromabasementonthehilll]

My Girlfriend Is a Witch (pt.1)

͙⁺･༓☾ - Summary: after finding the cabin, lottie ‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‏‏‎ ‏‏‎ ‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎‏‏‎‏‏‎ ‏‏‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎had begun acting weirder than usual.

Pairing: lottie matthews x fem!reader

Warnings: ...

Pt.2

a/n: thinking of making this into 2 or 3 parts?? this is more of a build up so I'm sorry if it's a bit slow!

∘₊✧────────────────────✧₊∘

It had been a week, maybe more, after the crash. You counted the days - believing it wasn't long until you would all be found and saved. Everyone followed the same belief, but it slowly began to lose its appeal as the days got longer and there was no promise of rescue, and you had lost track anyway.

Misty had treated you alongside everyone else, she wrapped your gashed shoulder up with a bandage out of some emergency aid kit in the planes cabinet, which you had been unwrapping everyday to keep clean. It was fine at first, but the shortages of antibiotics and extra bandages had it healing much slower than it should've, it hurt like a bitch and you were putting up the best 'tough' act you could to avoid adding anymore stress to the situation.

You sat outside of the cabin on a broken log, setting up fire to cook dinner, faintly smelling the herbs in the air that Mari managed to find whilst the others were either doing laundry or getting water from the nearby lake. Lottie hadn't been doing much, though. Her mind was in a different place ever since the crash, you noticed as she began to act differently recently, but you thought nothing of it - everyone else had been stressed, unorganised and tired, so why would it be out of the ordinary for Lottie to feel the same?

You and Lottie began dating a month before the flight, she had confessed to you one day after practice - you watched panic on her face as she barely managed to get her words out, before you laughed in reassurance and told her you felt the same way. Neither of you had told anyone about your relationship and wanted to keep it that way - it wouldn't benefit you or her.

"Hey, you okay?" she came up to you, sitting on the log opposite of the one you sat on, her expression ardent each time she saw you.

"Yeah, is Shauna done with the meat yet?" You asked, feeling hunger eat away at your stomach. "No I don't think so, she's trying to get Jackie to do something," she explained, "I'm sure she'll be done by the time you set up the fire, though." you nodded, giving up on rubbing sticks for the time being. "You look real good for someone who's stranded in the wilderness, y'know" she laughed, watching you trying to rub off the ash from last nights fire, "Shut up, Lottie" you teased with the same toothy smile she loved.

It took you a while to get used to the new situation, though more often than not you were helping around with things. In around 5th grade your parents thought it was a good idea to get you into girl scouts, you partially hated them for it - the uniform sucked and you'd always be covered in dirt. You had been mentally reciting the folklore stories told by the counsellors; as the wilderness caved in some of your old memories, often wondering if they had any truth to them. You stayed there until you turned 14, learning a bunch of survival skills that you brushed off as stupid, it was ironic how useful they were now.

"Lot, how are you?" You hadn't asked that in ages, too preoccupied with surviving, just as everyone else had been. Lottie's breath hitched, knowing she wasn't fine at all, considering her meds ran out. "I'm fine, I just missed you (y/n)." She smiled sheepishly, suppressing the doubt she had in her own words. She truly did miss you, the distance that brewed between you two wasn't as bad as it could've been, but she needed you the most right now.

You could sense her unease, standing up to sit next to her, "You can talk to me, you know that right?" You moved your hand towards hers, smiling warmly as you looked at each other. her eyes were filled with anguish, her jaw clenching before she spoke,

"Promise you won't think I'm weird?"

"I promise."

You leaned towards her, watching as she tucked her hair behind her ear before letting loose of her worry, "I've had these strange visions," Her gaze was diverted to the floor, "and I've been hearing things." she shook her head in disbelief, almost shocked; confused. "What kind of visions?" You kept your eyes on her, not thinking any less of her. "I don't know, it's like I can see what happens before it happens." She gave you a sorry look, you opened your mouth to speak before being interrupted by Shauna, "Here." Jackie stood behind her as Shauna handed you the meat, looking at it in complete disgust.

Lottie wasn't given the opportunity to offer you an explanation, but it made sense to you, considering her strange act for the past week.

-

The night grew colder than the last, you had been sleeping in the attic with lottie for the past few days to prove it wasn't haunted, and you struggled to keep heat upstairs. "Just sleep here, near the fire." Shauna stated after you had tried to haggle for more blankets, you refused, though, wanting to spend more time with Lottie and keep an eye on her after she had opened up to you. "well feel free to come downstairs, there's always room." she finished, laying down the pillows.

You climbed the ladder to see lottie already there, facing the window - illuminated by the moon and stars. sitting behind her, you spoke, "Another vision?" It was a couple days after she had spoken to you about them, and she told you what she could. They weren't too frequent, but when they happened you'd stay close to her.

"I heard a baby crying this time, it went on and off for a while, but I cant figure it out." Her words were cold and hurt. You were the only one who knew about her newfound state, since you swore not to tell anybody to avoid Lottie seeming crazy to the others, and that's why you tried your best to understand, to help her. but often your help was useless, you figured it might've just been a trauma response to the crash, and you stuck around. You wrapped your arms around her shoulders, hugging her from behind, bringing your body close to hers and resting your head on the back of her neck.

"Things'll gonna be okay, Lottie." Your voice was warming, bringing slight comfort to her discomfort.

You two sat there for a while, your eyes resting as she gazed at the night sky, before she turned to face you. "What if they won't be?" She bit her lip, making constant eye contact with you. She'd wear your jewellery often, you assumed it just got lost in the crash until you noticed, but she just wanted you close to her when you weren't around, and talking to each other for more than a minute was rare lately, so she had resorted to constant distress and longing.

She couldn't risk hurting you as a result of her own disturbance, just like she had before, and she subconsciously needed your reassurance that things wouldn't go that way.

"Why would you think that?" You shook your head, seeing Lottie avert her gaze to your shoulder, "Because things haven't been in our favour for a while." Her feelings were daunting to figure out, you looked up at her with sad yet hopeful eyes. "Stressing about it isn't gonna make it any better, Lot." You chuckled lightly, sensing tension brewing and wanting to avoid her mind going back into the dark place it would often wander to. She smiled in return, her eyes softening at your remark. "Hey do you remember when we would go on those road trips? you'd be so tired driving, I'd have to remind you not to crash into a tree" Lottie spoke, you saw her jaw soften and heard her laugh filling the wooden room, "And you would play shitty music just to rile me up," You added, "What?? I played it because I liked those songs (y/n), don't judge me,"

You two would often drive to seattle in your old beaten up sedan to visit your family, though you'd always make sure to turn it into a full blown camping roadtrip each time - since Washington was on the complete opposite side of New Jersey.

"You think we can go again after we're back home?" It didn't even cross your mind that Lottie thought there was chance of rescue, you were taken aback for a moment. When Lottie was with you something would alter inside of her, as if everything negative she ever believed had dissipated, you gave her hope.

"We'll go wherever you want."

She smiled a moment before her eyes looked up to yours and then down to your lips - then back to your eyes again, she kissed you and you could've sworn you felt religion in her lips; how they caressed yours with trails of grace.

-

"Are you fucking kidding me lottie?? what's gotten into you?" A riled up voice spat under lottie who had just stood there. "Nat, calm down." Shauna intervened, you walked out of the cabin, rubbing your puffy eyes as they adjusted to the light, woken by the voices after the best sleep you'd had in a while. "What's going on?" You looked towards Nat and Lottie.

"Lottie's acting like she's in The Craft or something, sort her out before she casts a spell on one of us." Natalie faced you with annoyance, your bottom lip slightly hung out - still half asleep. Everyone knew something was up with Lottie after she bashed her head into the window, it wasn't that much of a secret after all. Most were worried and you could tell, and so Natalie's reaction had you confused, you looked around to see everyone waiting for your response.

"She's been through a lot, like the rest of us. just leave her alone, Nat." You sighed, everyone went back inside - Natalie flailing her arms as you gestured for Lottie to follow you somewhere deeper into the forest. "What happened? are you okay?" You stopped amongst the woods, "Yeah, fine." she looked distressed and distant, crossing her arms, "Just ignore her, she didn't mean it," Lottie cut you off as her rushing thoughts came out,

"But what if she's right? what if I really am going crazy?"

"You're not crazy Lottie, you're just as fucked as the rest of us, nothing more." Your reassurance seemed to get through to her, your words meant the world to her and you knew it.

"You don't think there's something wrong with me?" Her face was almost pale, skin rough and almost loving eyes.

"Oh my god, of course not," you faltered into a feathery smile, "You're perfect, Lottie." You watched as her face began to regain her warm colour, softening at your words. Sometimes it felt like the world stopped around you when you were near her, you would've done anything - just to see her okay again, and she would've done anything to see you carefree and happy, just like you used to be.

She looked to the ground, laughing in relief while small tears left her eyes. "And I'm the sappy one?"

"Yeah okay, I'm not the one who wrote a love letter as an apology," She slapped your shoulder and you kept giggling like a maniac, before you were stopped dead in your tracks by Misty carrying an empty water bucket, "Are you two planning on helping?" One hand on her hip and the other holding out the bucket, "It's unfair to think you're exempt from helping when we should all be-"

"Jeez okay we'll fill it up." Lottie suppressed her laughter the best she could, running to take the bucket from an impatient Misty.

After getting back to the cabin, you settled on the living room floor with a blanket and a book. You never read books much before, however somehow it had become a routine by now.

"What're you reading?" Lottie asked, sliding down next to you.

"To the Lighthouse, Virgina Woolf. I found it in one of the drawers in the attic."

"Any good?" You never took Lottie as a reader, her interests only really came to surface when you would talk about yours, "I'll finish it and let you know." You looked at her with a smile, closing the book and resting it to the side for the time being.

-

Your mouth was filled with sickening sweetness as you chewed on the last of your food, which just happened to be the gummies your mom packed you 'for the road'.

There was no food left, and your hunger began to yearn for something else - someone else.

And her winter was cursed with your bewitchment,

the loving haze which she had caused upon you herself.

[torreshalstead]

a choice born from hope not fear

Summary - She couldn’t, wouldn’t, end up alone like Voight with no one else to call in a crisis.

She deserved more than that and she had a choice to make.

11x13 Speculation Fic

Notes - The idea for this was born at 4am so I hope it makes sense but it was my attempt of making a little sense of the road they seem to be leading Hailey down for her exit. Happy Reading ❤️ AO3 Link

He had called her.

He had been told to call the person he loved most and Voight had picked her.

In the moment Hailey didn’t really comprehend his actions, put any thought behind his decision, the phone call was merely a means to an end for her and the rest of the team and that’s exactly what it ended up being. They got Voight back, Matson was shot and killed and pronounced dead on scene. Voight bore some marks of visible injuries, they hadn’t managed to get to him before Matson had started to inflict some of the torture that he got off on. But he was alive and had been taken to Med. Telling Matson’s wife had been left to Kevin, he was always the best with loved ones and he had volunteered to break the news.

Afterwards the rest of the team had gone home in one piece.

But as she sat on her couch, curled underneath a blanket and staring at the blank TV, Voight’s actions were beginning to make her think.

He had been a cop for over 30 years, lived in this city his entire life, swore to protect it and almost lost his life for it more than once and the only person he had thought to call at that exact moment had been her.

She was the only person left in his life.

His wife was dead.

His son was dead.

His grandchild moved away.

His best friend was dead.

Hailey was all he had left.

As she looked down at her left hand, the ring finger still hauntingly empty, she released if she kept going the way she was, she was going to end up like him.

And not in a Sergeant of her own unit, a cop that people feared more than they respected, crossed lines without thinking of the consequences kind of way.

But in an alone kind of way.

If she kept throwing herself into work as hard as she was, isolating herself and failing to build on the friendships she had once treasured, she would end up alone like Voight.

And that thought terrified her.

Hailey had thought she would be fine on her own, and had spent many years of her life living up to that self imposed expectation. She worked hard, excelled at her job, kept people at arm's length and was happy for most iterations of the word.

And then she joined Intelligence and learnt it could be so much more.

She had joined Intelligence, reconnected with Trudy, met Jay, become a part of the unit, a part of something bigger than her and she was no longer alone.

She had a place, a purpose. She had people that would miss her if she was no longer around, that cared about her.

And she relished that feeling.

Somewhere along the murky lanes that had been her life for the past 15 months, she had gotten lost and forgotten how much she enjoyed those connections. How part of being something bigger, made her a better person. After Jay had left her, she had questioned everything, everything about herself and who she was and had come to the conclusion that the only solution was to lock herself away. Bottle up all her emotions and attempt to control them by running for miles on end and tiring herself out to the point of exhaustion.

But all she had done was ended up alone.

If she had been the one to be taken. If Matson had told her to call the person she loved most in this world, would she have had anybody to call?

She let out a shaky breath as she glanced at the phone sitting face down on the couch next to her.

She wouldn’t end up like Voight.

She couldn’t end up like him.

She still had so much to give in this world, so much of herself still to discover to end up being a person who had no one to call when the going got tough.

As Hailey reasoned it, she had three choices.

She could stay in Chicago, the city that had been her home for her entire life and she could truly make it a home. She could work on the connections she already had, accept the dinner invitations when they were offered, agree to the after work drinks and even attend dance recitals to support Makayla. She could go throw her net wider, find like minded people and truly feel at peace with her decision to stay here. She could find a running group and learn to love the exercise she did rather than viewing it as a punishment or a tool. She could be the Hailey Upton she always wanted to be in the city that she loved.

Or she could leave. The country was a big place, and any major city would have enough crime to keep her occupied as a seasoned cop with over a decade under her belt. She could go to Miami or Atlanta, Portland or Boston. Somewhere where nobody knew Hailey Upton. No one had links to the past she had tried to hide or the person who no longer felt like her. She could stay in Intelligence work or move across and try something new. She could use a fresh start and the possibilities were almost limitless.

Or she could answer her phone when it rang.

He had called her once a week, every Saturday evening for the past 4 months and she had never once answered. He didn’t leave a voicemail, didn’t send her a text, just called her like clockwork. And like clockwork she watched as his name flashed across her screen and then went blank.

She didn’t know what Jay wanted and if she was being honest with herself, she was terrified to find out.

They were divorced, he had returned the papers signed after she had sent him a text asking him to and she hadn’t spoken to him since. They were strangers now, two individuals with lives that didn’t interconnect or cross paths. And you didn’t pick up the phone to strangers.

Except, he wasn’t a stranger. Not truly. He was Jay.

He was the Jay who made her believe that she could love and be loved and it wasn’t a terrifying prospect. He was the Jay who made her waffles and told her that he loved her before showing her in every possible way. He was the Jay who had her back on the job and kept her safe.

He was the Jay who broke her heart.

Maybe he was calling to explain, to apologise.

She didn’t know if she wanted to hear it, if she could even accept his apology if he were to offer one. Too much had happened, too much they couldn’t take back.

So she ignored his calls.

But they kept coming.

Answering them was her third choice. Her final option. She could risk her heart again, risk losing a part of herself she had been trying desperately to regain all for the sake of not being alone again.

Because that was what life was right? That’s what human’s strived for. To find someone to share life with, to find someone to walk alongside you so you didn’t have to go through it alone. Someone to share the big moments with and the small, the life changing and the mundane. Someone to hold your hand and be on your side.

Hailey wasn’t certain of much anymore, everything she believed to be true had been warped one way or another but she knew she didn’t want to be alone. She knew she wouldn’t end up like Voight having nobody to call when the worst happened. She deserved more than that. She deserved to give herself a chance.

It was a Saturday night. Her phone would ring any minute.

She took a deep breath, her breath still shaky but her hands steady and flipped the phone over.

She had made her decision.

[simslegacy5083]

Today's (10/15/2024) Episode: Grinding to Victory

Fortunately, the start of school year was easy on Skye, as despite his parent’s high expectations neither of them could spare him much attention. 

Noemi was kept busy pushing her team to finalize Watcher Tales in time for the New Years release, and Luigi was even busier.

Not only did he have his “day job” as an e-sports celebrity to worry about, but he was also working harder than anyone else to get his game to market.

Had Noemi known how much time her husband was spending on the computer in pursuit of his current professional goals she would have surely intervened, so he took great pains to make certain she didn't find out.

He encouraged his shy bride to manage their team (many of whom did not work out of headquarters) remotely by voice chat and email while he commuted to Rainy Days' corporate offices each day. Without her looking over his shoulder he could easily gloss over how many breaks he was taking.

Although Luigi knew resting his hand was important, getting his game to market on schedule was his top priority and everything moved along much more quickly with his uninterrupted, active involvement in the build. If a little more discomfort than usual was the price for that, it was a price he was willing to pay.

With the Del Sol E-Sports championship game right around the corner Luigi was pushing himself just as hard gaming as he was programming, hopping a teleport most evenings straight from downtown to the E-Sports complex in Newcrest for skirmish practice and games. 

He was more skilled than most of his teammates by now in the finer points of Sim Scuffle strategy but felt woefully rusty when it came to putting that knowledge to practical use on the playing field after being forced to take so much time off following the lightning strike incident. 

Placing at the upcoming tournament would finally earn him the title of Championship Gamer and catapult him to the top of the E-Sports career, and Luigi wanted that final promotion desperately. If he went down in history as a bonafide champion, it would quash the recent nasty rumors that he no longer had what it took to "hack it" at a professional level. He had to prove the naysayers wrong, no matter the cost.

The night of the tournament Luigi settled down at his PC and tried to ignore the burning ache that was his constant companion as of late "I just have to get through tonight" he told himself "Watcher Tales is in the final testing phase, at last, and if I place here, I'll earn my promotion. I can do this!" 

A few hours later the announcer finally called out “… and that's it, folks! It’s my pleasure to announce your new E-Sports Championship Gamers… Beau Romano, Frank Harris, and Luigi Lawbourne!" He'd achieved the pinnacle of his professional career that night, but the smile on Luigi's face was closer to a grimace as he gripped his swollen mousing hand tightly under the table, clenching his teeth against the pain.

"Well, your highness, we did it!" Beau said, coming up behind his friend and slapping him on the back as they made their way to the podium to collect their award. "Of course, I still kicked your butt, but what's new?" 

His jovial expression fell away when he saw the look on Luigi's face "Whoa, what's wrong? Is it your hand again?“ At Luigi’s reluctant nod, his concern deepened. "Did you tell doc so he can give you the once over?"

"No time.” Luigi shrugged “I’ll catch up with him tomorrow if I miss him tonight. It's not like he'll have anything new to tell me."

Rather than replying Beau darted away, much to the confusion of the sims waiting to hand the players their trophies.

Reappearing a minute later he whispered "They couldn't start the ceremony without the evenings #1 gamer, am I right? Doc is waiting for you over by the med station."

Luigi nodded, silently mouthing "thank you“ to his friend before queuing up behind him to collect his 3rd place prize.

View The Full Story of My Not So Berry Challenge Here

[nicole-tivan123]

Taneleer Tivan x reader

[if y’all want more, just let me know! This takes place right after the destruction of the collectors collection. Also sorry if it’s bad, this is my first time writing a fanfic so if you have any advice to make it better, let me know✨]

It’s another day in knowhere, you were just minding your own business walking along the dark and dangerous streets of knowhere. All of a sudden you hear and see an explosion coming from the collectors museum, you rush over to the museum and see rocket, groot, star lord and gamora who was carrying a shiny looking orb. You wondered to yourself if it was that thing that caused all the commotion. You then make your way inside of the museum to see if Taneleer is ok.

you have had a crush on Taneleer for years but never got the courage to approach him about it. He was always friendly to you when he saw you, you and him were friends. You both became friends after his brother En dwi Gast showed you to him, you were also friends with En dwi as you both enjoyed games and competing in those games. Taneleer saw how En dwi trusted you which made Taneleer trust you too.

You managed to make your way through all the broken glass and rubble, you then saw Taneleer struggling and whimpering to get up off the ground, he was holding his hand on his forehead, he removed it to which you saw a big deep cut of his head where he had been his in the explosion.

“Taneleer…TANELEER ARE YOU OK?” You yelled as you make your way through more rubble. He turned to your direction, recognising your voice. “Yes…I mean no… I mean…kinda” he said still struggling to get up off the floor. You then finally make your way over to him and slowly and gently helped him up onto a nearby chair.

“What happened?” You asked as you look around for a medical kit. “Gamora and her new friends or whoever they are came in to give me an orb containing an infinity stone” he said looking at you with his hand on his head to stop the blood from dripping all over the place. You turned and looked at him surprised knowing how rare and valuable they are and that Taneleer already contained the reality stone. “An infinity stone?! Did you get it?…” you asked curiously. “No…my assistant went to grab it to take for herself… she clearly wasn’t strong enough to handle the power of the stone and then… well you see the aftermath…” he said looking down, clearly upset about his whole collection being destroyed.

You find a med kit and get out some bandages and a few other items to bandage up the collectors head wound. “Let me see the wound” you said gently moving his hand out the way. You wiped his wound with some sterile wipes to which he winced at and grabbed your arm tightly. “Sorry” he said letting go of your arm. “It’s ok, you can grip on as hard as you want as long as it makes you feel any better” you said in a soft voice before giving him a reassuring smile to which he gave a small smile back to you. You then managed to bandage his head up then go over to the bar in his museum to get him and yourself a drink.

“Hey… thank you for bandaging me up (y/n)” he said while getting up off the chair and walking over to you. “It’s ok, I worry about you every day you know? With your collecting job, I worried something like this would happen eventually, your just lucky I was in the area and not on sakkar today” you said handing over his drink to him. “ I know you worry about me (y/n), but this is my job… it’s who I am, it’s dangerous I know but that’s the thrill of it” he said giving a little chuckle at the end and exchanged a smirk. “I’m serious Taneleer… I don’t want you getting hurt… I like you a lot you know” you said quietly while looking down at your drink.

Taneleer puts his hand under your chin and gently lifts it up to which you then both make eye contact. “ I know you like me… En told me…” he said before kissing your forehead. “Goddammit En! That was our secret!” You said annoyed to yourself. Taneleer thought it was cute how angry you was at his brother, he smiled at you before gently pulling you in closer to him. “ I knew for a long time you liked me but… with it being my brother who told me I didn’t know whether to believe him… I kinda always had a crush on you too but was too nervous to say anything…” he said before kissing your head again. You blush and look down at your drink before putting it aside and wrapping your arms around his neck. You both look at each other before kissing each other on the lips, he winced as he has a cut on his lip but didn’t want to ruin the moment between you both so said nothing. He then gets his fluffy cape and wrapped it around you to have you closer to him. His cape was soft and warm you could almost fall asleep to how comfy it was.

You both then stop and look at each other, Taneleer taking his gloves off and putting them aside before putting his hand on your cheek and smiling at you. His hands were warm and you enjoyed the feel of his skin on yours. “ shouldn’t we get started on rebuilding your collection Taneleer?” You asked him while leaning your head in his hand. “ that can wait… you are my most important priority right now” he then brought you closer to him for another kiss. “ I’m serious Taneleer I don’t want to be kissing you with broken glass and rubble everywhere, it’s dangerous” you then giggled to which he did the same. You both then got to work together to rebuild his collection, with you by his side every step of the way.

(Hope you guys enjoyed reading, if there is any way to improve my writing just let me know so I can do better in the future)

[jemipola]

The person who previously inhabited this body (and i dont mean that in a transgender way. i mean that in a... youll see). The person who previously inhabited this body died a while ago.

She always knew that she was alone in the world. She had two choices: save herself, or die. Well, she looked at saving herself. Its the first thing youd try when faced with this dilemma dont you think. And she tried her best, but couldnt do it. So then she tried to die, but she couldnt do that either. Instead, she would cut herself off from life, from connection, from sadness, from everything. And her soul would wither and die like it needed to. Whatever was left, the husk, would keep on going, living through this unbearable life, but this didnt matter much to her.

But the husk kept going. A new soul was not born to replace the one lost. Instead, think of it as some underling taking control after management left. It didnt really know where it was going. Or how to love, or how to feel. But it did know that it needed to keep moving forward.

The husk couldnt escape the life of the girl though. And it too, in time, realized it faced that same question. Save itself. Or die. And the husk too wanted to choose the first option, except that it was a little older, and it had money and it had freedom.

So here I am. Just trying to save myself and not die.

Ive done a lot lately. I started HRT about a year ago. I dont really know about this whole gender thing, but i know she would have liked it. I cant deny the brain fog has gotten better. At least when the testosterone suppressors are working correctly. Which isnt always. I tried a couple times to ask for different meds, or higher doses, but im having trouble standing up for myself sometimes. She was always better at that than i was.

When puberty started it was obviously a bad time for both of us. I remember we started growing a thin mustache and it made her cry. Trying ever to be helpful, i got the bright idea to try to use duct tape to remove the hairs. Thankfully our face was too greasy for that to work... She eventually mustered up the courage to go ask our dad for a razor. But she never liked the stubble it left. She taught me all the things about us that would never be good enough. All the things that would cause her pain. Its how i know what im supposed to be fixing today. I started laser hair removal a few months ago. It looks better now a little, i think...

When she made her decision to wither and die, i put on a brave face for the world because I didnt want anyone to hurt her. I was always good at my job. I never dropped the ball in school, even when shed cry us to sleep almost every night (or sometimes mid afternoon). I wonder, if i had maybe done a little less good a job, if someone would have taken notice that she was hurting. Someone would have cared. I was protecting her and she was alone.

I shouldnt be so hard on myself. Its not like i really knew what she was going through. She never told me about her decision. I just knew I had to take over more and more of the responsibility running the place when she could not. One day i woke up and realized i hadnt seen her in a while. I didnt look too hard. At the time it felt liberating. To not feel so deeply. Obviously, over time ive come more to terms with what ive lost. Its hard living without your soul.

When i was in college, long after she had left me, i attempted suicide. Kinda sorta. I told myself that id just figure out how to hang myself so id know how to do it if i ever needed to. The kind of lie you tell yourself to get started on something youve been procrastinating. Ill just sit down and write the first paragraph of this essay. Then once youre sitting there, and the essay feels inevitable. Why stop now. Just write the whole damn thing. Except in this case i think part of it wasnt a lie. My heart wasnt really in it. This whole suicide thing. When we were younger and she wanted to choose death. I was the one who couldnt pull the trigger (so to speak). Maybe i wanted to be prepared in case she ever came back and decided she wanted to die again, id have the bravery and the knowledge to make it happen for her. Wed go out together. She wouldnt leave me alone again.

I think about her coming back a lot. I only need to fix all the things that killed her and then one day ill turn around and see her there again, full of love. "Ive been back for a while now dear, how didnt you notice? Well, you must just have been so busy running the place while I was away. I like what youve done with it. Im so proud of you..." is what she might say to me. Its one of those daydreams you file under the same category as "winning the lottery", "what if i discovered something really cool and important", or "what if i had a boyfriend who loved me".

On my bad days im convinced that ill just have to live the rest of my life with a piece missing. We spent so much time together, I know that she truly died, she isnt just in hiding. They say when we die we live on in the hearts of our loved ones. I did love her, i think. Shed know better. Ive been crying a lot more lately. That was always like... her favorite thing. Im learning to like it too

[luthorwarriorprincess]

Ok I feel this so hard. A couple years ago I moved and had to go see a psychiatrist because for some stupid reason my PCP couldn't prescribe me my ADD meds because they "don't do that" there (???).

Anyway, this trained and licensed psychiatrist asked me why I was seeing her that day and I said for continuation of care on my medicine. I had done all of the testing that took hours, I had been working with my previous PCP to get the correct dosage down, I was doing everything right and just needed a new script.

She then went on for an hour about how my ADD test results must have been incorrect because I wasn't diagnosed when I was a kid. She said "most adults don't just get ADD". Like, no shit Sherlock, my parents just weren't in a place or in mindset to get me tested so I suffered through school. She then told me there was no way that could be because I have a master's degree and "most people with ADD can't even finish college".

Now, I'm the type of person who instead of holding in my anger, I just cry the angrier I get, I dislike this about myself but it is what happens. Therefore, when this bitch continued to berate me about it, then ask me why I was so upset, then laughed (yes, laughed) and said "you're addicted to the meds, why else would you be crying and this upset right now? I'm not going to give you anything, we don't do that here."

*Side note: I have never been addicted to anything, I've never even had a sip of alcohol my entire 32 years of existence*

BITCH, WHAT?! Then why did I have to pay $130 to see you when all you knew you were going to do is laugh at me, tell me I'm a drug addict, then turn me away??

So, according to this trained and licensed psychiatrist, adults can't be diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, they are just drug seeking and emotionally unstable. This entire situation shook me to my core, it actually made my mental health plummet more than ever before. I was in shock at what happened and had never in my life experienced such horrible medical care.

My fiance (who is a remarkably calm person compared to me and is a Nurse Practitioner) was absolutely livid. I don't remember what she did (I think called the office to bitch them out) because I was nearly fucking comatose after that.

Shout out to this bitch whose name I don't ever care to try and remember from the Community Mental Health Clinic on the North side of Indianapolis. FUCK YOU.

We moved back home and I got my old PCP back and now we manage my very real condition together as a team. Because you must be an advocate for yourself and have a say in your own medical care.

[fairyniceyeah]

💎🦌Day 22: "What's the bad news?"

Poison/Bed-Ridden/Cauterization

@juneofdoom

Day 21: "Let's play a game"

Summary: It was only a stomach flu…

CW: emeto, seizure, hospital

Whumpee/Sickie: Joshua

Caretaker: S.Coups + Jeonghan

Day Zero

"I'm going to turn in for tonight”, Joshua whispered and lifted the blanket he had been sharing with Jeonghan off his legs. 

Jeonghan turned his attention away from the movie that was playing - it was voluntary movie night instigated by BooSeokSoon in Jeonghan’s dorm - towards his fellow 95liner. Joshua had seemed a bit off, a bit pale all day and now he winced as he moved to detangle himself from Seungkwan, who had fallen asleep on his lap. The youngest vocalist just turned in his sleep, mumbling something before becoming still again.

“You okay?”, Jeonghan whispered, not wanting to have the other’s attention on them. He doubted Joshua would appreciate that.

The other vocalist nodded. “I’m fine. Just a bit of a stomach ache. I think dinner might be having an issue with me.” His hand had moved to cradle his abdomen but other than that and his paleness he seemed good. Maybe an early night wouldn't hurt.

“Do you need anything? Meds, hot water bottle?”, Jeonghan questioned but received a shake of Joshua’s head as an answer.

“I’ll just lie down. If I need anything, Cheollie and Minghao-yah are at our dorm after all”, Joshua answered as he stood up and then said a bit louder, so that everybody awake could hear him: “I’m going to sleep. Good night.”

A chorus of “Good night”s followed him out.

Day One 

“Cheollie, it’s not even six am”, Jeonghan complained into his phone which’s ringing had disturbed his sleep, “why are you already up?”

“I haven’t turned in yet”, Seungcheol answered with a sigh. That had Jeonghan’s attention. “Shua is sick. He has been throwing up since he came back from yours and he’s running a decent temperature…”

He wanted to continue but Jeonghan, having rolled onto his stomach to actually be able to use his phone without the danger of falling back asleep, interrupted him: “He told me yesterday he had a stomach ache from dinner. Why didn’t he say he was nauseous?”

“He said it only really got bad when walking and in the elevator. Anyways, I already spoke to a manager - I’m staying home with Shua today. He’s asleep right now and hasn’t been throwing up every half hour since four but I don’t doubt he’ll feel awful when he wakes up. He’s also still at 38.3°C”, Seungcheol explained, “since I haven’t slept and was with him, the manager said that it’s best that I stay to catch up on some sleep and to stop the risk of contagion. So, congratulations, you’re in charge today.”

In the evening Jeonghan had convinced the manager that it didn’t matter if he went to see Joshua - he’d been cuddling with the sick member the whole past evening, if he was to get sick he’d get sick. 

“Hey”, he whispered as he entered his best friend’s bedroom. Joshua was sitting up with a pillow propping him up against the headboard. He was looking ashen-gray and the very definition of sick. There was a bucket sitting on the floor by his head, clean but still wet from the water used to clean it out. Joshua was reading a book though it seemed like he wasn’t taking much in.

“Hi, Han-ah”, Joshua greeted, looking up. He placed the book away without putting a bookmark - so he really hadn’t been paying attention to it. “What are you doing here? You didn’t sneak in, did you? It’s bad enough that I might have infected Cheollie already.”

“I came to see how you were, dumbass. I was worried and besides, we were cuddling. If I am destined to get sick, I already have been cursed”, Jeonghan answered and sat on the edge of Joshua’s bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Awful”, Joshua mumbled with a sigh, “my stomach feels like it’s been turned into lava. The cramps are terrible, the vomiting is worse. And I’m so cold from the fever.”

As if to make his point, he shivered.

“I’m sorry, baby”, Jeonghan said and brushed a sweat-soaked curl away from where it was stuck to Joshua’s equally sweaty forehead, “is there anything I can do to help?”

“Not really. Before he went to nap, Cheollie already gave me some fever reducers, pain meds and the anti-emetic”, Joshua mumbled before his voice turned bitter, “then I threw it all up and Wonwoo had to help me.”

“You know none of us mind”, Jeonghan comforted, “how long ago was that?”

“I don’t know. Forty-five minutes? Something like that”, Joshua replied, “no, don’t say it.”

Jeonghan smiled at him. “Why don’t we try some plain rice? Mingyu made it specifically for you and gave it his best.”

Joshua snorted, then seemed to regret that as the motion pulled at his aching stomach. “We’re an Asian household. I think we’d die if we didn’t have rice available at all times.”

“Fair enough. I’m actually scared for Jihoon-ah, just thinking about it”, Jeonghan joked. Then he turned serious: “You should really try eating. You need some strength.”

Joshua acquiesced. 

Five minutes after he’d had some rice, Joshua had to bury his face in the bucket again, choking up the few bites he had managed to swallow. As he managed to stop gagging and with trails of spit dangling from his lips, he rasped: “I told you.”

Seungcheol sent Jeonghan home to his dorm half an hour later, claiming Jeonghan needed his sleep - which was rich coming from the insomniac general leader but Jeonghan felt guilty enough about making Joshua eat that he just went quietly. 

Day Two

Jeonghan woke up to a text message.

Seungcheol (04:28): I’m staying home with Shua-yah again.

They all were worried, every single member not really focused on work that day. Joshua hadn’t been able to keep anything down for over twenty-four hours and his fever was steadily burning. Not even the hot water bottle seemed to be able to soothe the pain and sore muscles. He was basically bed-ridden by then, his strength not enough to drag himself to the bathroom even if he wanted to. Jeonghan received a picture from a manager during vocal practice - Seungcheol and Joshua curled up on the leader’s big bed together, both asleep and Joshua so tiny in the eldest’s arms. Nobody needed to know that Jeonghan put it in his folder of his favorite Seventeen pictures.

Jeonghan didn’t go to see them that day.

Day Three

They all had a day off. Jeonghan had forced himself into the other apartment. Seungcheol needed sleep. Joshua needed to get better. And Jeonghan was worried. 

“Go sleep, Cheollie”, Jeonghan whispered, so as not to wake the sleeping Joshua.

“But …”, Seungcheol protested, nervously biting his lip, eyebrows furrowed. “He’s so sick.”

“I know. But you need rest”, Jeonghan said, opening his arms for the exhausted leader. Immediately Seungcheol had thrown himself into the embrace, obviously overly tired and exhausted, overwhelmed by caring for a member so sick. If Joshua wasn’t better soon, they’d have to take him to the hospital. Already the company doctor had given him some IV fluids and meds but it seemed it had only helped make Joshua sleep. “I’ll take good care of him for you.”

Seungcheol nodded, rubbing his eyes and yawning. “Wake me if you need help. Anything.”

Jeonghan laughed softly and shoved him out of the door. “Rest, ddaddu.”

Then he was alone with Joshua. He made himself comfortable in the chair beside the bed, opening the book Joshua hadn't touched for days.

“Hey, Shua, baby, wake up for me”, Jeonghan whispered, stroking sweat-soaked hair plastered to Joshua’s forehead back. “You need to eat lunch.”

It took a good while for Jeonghan to get Joshua awake and even then his eyes kept falling shut. It was obvious just how exhausted he was, how ill he was. “Han?”, he rasped, voice nearly gone from repeated vomiting, “I’m so tired. I just want to sleep.”

“I’m sorry, baby, I know”, Jeonghan mumbled. He hated himself for disturbing Joshua’s rest like that but he hadn’t eaten in so long and he was growing weaker. If he didn’t manage to eat until that evening they had agreed to bring him to the hospital. “But you need nutrients and fluids. And we should take your temperature again.”

“I’ll just throw up again”, Joshua protested weakly, “I don’t want to eat.”

“If you don’t eat I’ll take you to the hospital now”, Jeonghan said softly. It wasn’t a threat. It was worry. 

“No. No hospital. Please.”

As Joshua protested, never having been a fan of hospitals and likely feeling too wretched for the trip, Jeonghan nearly wished Joshua had agreed. Except for Wonwoo’s gastroenteritis, he couldn’t remember seeing a member so sick before. Maybe they shouldn’t wait till evening for a hospital visit but getting Joshua to agree looked like an impossible task. Forcing him would be no good either. So Jeonghan sighed and pulled out the thermometer. 

Joshua kept his eyes closed, fingers entangled with Jeonghan’s as they waited for the results. “39.5°C”, Jeonghan read with worry, “Shua, it hasn’t gone down at all today. If anything, it’s up.”

“Just give me some painkillers for my stomach if I have to eat - they’ll help with the fever too”, Joshua muttered. Jeonghan nodded, running his fingers through his hair for a moment. 

“Give me a moment, I’ll get the meds and food.”

Joshua didn’t respond.

“How is he?”, Wonwoo asked from where he was perched on a kitchen chair, watching Mingyu cook. 

“Fever is still high. He doesn’t want to but I told him he needs to eat. I have half a mind to just pack him into a car and drive him to a hospital”, Jeonghan sighed and slumped down on the chair beside him. Wonwoo sighed.

“Do you think it could be what I had?”, he asked worriedly. 

Mingyu turned around from the stove at that moment. “Why aren’t you taking him to the hospital?”

“I don’t know”, Jeonghan said to both questions. “He really doesn’t want to go.”

“He also has a fever going through the roof - he isn’t thinking clearly”, Wonwoo pointed out, “but it’s your choice.”

“I just don’t want to force him. You know he hates hospitals. He doesn’t like needles. I want him to be comfortable”, Jeonghan said with doubt in his heart, “can you make him some soup, Mingyu-yah?”

“One step ahead of you, hyung”, Mingyu said, pointing to the stove, “it’s already done.”

“Oh, thanks.” Maybe Jeonghan shouldn’t have been surprised. They all were so close with each other and caring for each other in their own ways had easily become second nature to them.

When Jeonghan entered the bedroom again, carrying a steaming bowl of soup, Joshua was fast asleep again. There was a bit of bile in the bucket, Jeonghan saw, grimacing. Joshua had nothing left in himself to throw up.

Waking Joshua was hard. No matter what Jeonghan tried - whispering his name, gently shaking his shoulder, calling his name loudly, using the cool cloth to try to shock him into wakefulness - it didn’t work.

Jeonghan felt himself start to tremble when he realized that, no, Joshua wasn’t asleep. This was not sleep at all, it was unconsciousness. Fear was gripping Jeonghan’s heart as he stumbled a step back. Was his fever that high? As he lifted his hand to touch Joshua’s forehead he found it burning.

“Cheollie”, he yelled, panicked. He was so out of his depth. “Seungcheol! I need help!”

The door behind him crashed open, admitting Mingyu and Wonwoo first - having been the closest - followed by a half-asleep leader who suddenly looked wide-awake the moment he laid his eyes on Joshua and the trembling Jeonghan.

“What happened?”, he asked, pushing past the other two rappers.

“I went to get him some food but when I came back, he … Shua … he wouldn’t wake …”, Jeonghan started, trying to suppress his tears. He whirled around as Joshua made a sound, somewhere between a groan and a grunt. 

Jeonghan heard somebody start to sob when he took in the scene. Joshua’s body was tense on the bed, back arched as his eyes were rolling behind closed lids. Everyone of his appendages was trembling and then…

Then Joshua began to seize.

Jeonghan was helpless to watch, as Seungcheol ordered Mingyu to call an ambulance and told Wonwoo to time … it. His eyes were fixed on Joshua, who was groaning, making these awful sounds that didn’t even sound quite human as his body was thrown from side to side. Seungcheol ran to pull the blanket off Joshua, receiving a kick in the stomach by an uncoordinated limp, but he didn’t even seem fazed.

Two hours later the four of them, Seungcheol, Wonwoo, Mingyu and Jeonghan, were sitting in a waiting room in a random hospital. They hadn’t seen Joshua since the ambulance had sped off with him shortly after they had arrived. The paramedics had been mumbling about low blood pressure but a too high pulse, a fever burning over 40°C and bad dehydration. Joshua had looked so small, hooked up to so many machines.

Now, all they could do was wait. 

Seungcheol was pacing. Wonwoo was just staring at the opposite wall. Mingyu was trying to distract himself with his phone. Jeonghan hadn’t yet stopped crying.

They had let the other know, of course, leaving Jun, Hoshi and Woozi in charge. It would normally be a disaster waiting to happen but as far as Jeonghan knew they were all just gathered in the 8th floor dorm waiting for news and taking comfort in each other's presence.

Jeonghan startled badly as the door opened and a doctor walked in. Hopeful eyes turned up to her and she gave them a tight nod in greeting. 

“Joshua-ssi is asleep at the moment. Our fears of a burst appendix or other infected organs have been proven wrong and his fever has gone down a bit. He didn’t have another seizure”, she said. Mingyu breathed out in relief, leaning his head on Wonwoo’s shoulder, who pulled him close. Seungcheol had stopped pacing, instead listening intensely. 

“What’s the bad news?”, Jeonghan asked quietly. Why would the doctor start with telling them what it wasn’t? Why wasn’t she saying what was wrong with Joshua?

The doctor sighed. “It appears as if Joshua-ssi is suffering from Escherichia coli or in short E.Coli.”

Seungcheol frowned. “Food poisoning? Food poisoning can do that?”

“Basically, yes”, the doctor said, “E.Coli is food poisoning. But in Joshua-ssi’s case it has turned into bacteremia. It’s an infection or rather poisoning of the bloodstream caused by bacteria entering the blood due to a scrape or cut. We think that due to the excess vomiting Joshua-ssi’s esophagus was torn a bit, causing the bacteria he was throwing up to enter his blood. Due to this, he developed sepsis.”

“Oh, God”, Seungcheol mumbled and collapsed into the chair next to Jeonghan. The younger gently took his hand, needing the support as much as the leader did.

“How are you treating him?”, Wonwoo asked, as always able to keep a clear head.

“We put him into an artificial coma so his body can rest. He is receiving oxygen and antibiotics to treat the infection”, the doctor explained.

“Is … is he going to be okay?”, Jeonghan whispered, not daring to look up from where he was fiddling with Seungcheol’s team ring. 

“If the medication helps as much as we hope, yes. But we need to wait and see how it progresses before we promise anything”, she answered.

“Can we see him?”, Seuncgheol said.

“Not yet. We’re keeping him in isolation for now, so he can’t get into contact with any other germs. If he gets better in the next two days, you’ll be able to see him.”

Day One of Joshua being able to return to their schedules was likely one of the best the group had ever experienced. 

Two weeks after the initial hospitalization, including three days in coma, Joshua was allowed to return home to the dorm. He was still weak, pale and mostly sleeping the days away. Three days later the fever returned and he was bedridden in the hospital again. It was touch and go for a while.

But now, nearly two months later, Joshua was with them at the photo shoot scheduled for that day. All members, even those who were already finished with theirs and allowed to leave, stuck around to watch him together.

Joshua was really glowing under the flood lights.

Jeonghan couldn’t help but smile as Seungcheol pressed his hand.

“He’s okay, Han-ah. He’s okay.”

Day 23: "You're doing great"

Masterlist links: Fairy's Masterlist 2024 Fairy's Masterlist 2025 Fairy's June of Doom 2024  

[katelynntheyogi]

Hey you,

I hope you’re doing well. Honestly. How’s your dad? Is his knee doing okay? I know the rain and weather can really cause some pain. Is your mom still hating her job? Has Sandy been going to PT often? I’m sure her arm is slowly, but surely getting better. How’s work been? Is the clinic busy? I bet Jacqueline is still being a bitch. Any conferences planned for the year? I know you like to travel, but you do miss home when you’re gone too long. How’s Doggo and Aiofe? Are they adjusting well in wherever you are? Is Doggo still on his meds every day? Does Aiofe still like her buttons? Car still running good? I’m happy for you.

How am I?

Oh I’m good! Yeah. I have been staying busy as I’m sure you can imagine. I never knew how to stop moving & still don’t. The kids are all good. Franklin is doing really well now actually. I have been keeping up on the house just fine. Changed a few things since you left. They came out really good. You know I was always good at making a house a home. Ratchet is actually a really sweet cat and I’m glad that I kept him. He makes the hard days a little bit better. Luna and I have been managing the heat really well and we are staying pretty cool. You know that was always a worry when we first moved in. It is really nice out here. I’m glad I stayed. How’s my family? Oh they’re good! Sara and Carter have been really great. I don’t know what I wold do without them. (I’d lie here) And my parents? They are good too! I’ve gotten dinner with them a few times and they came over to see my house. They liked it (end lie). I’ve been making a lot of yummy recipes that I have the time to try now. None that you would have liked I’m sure.

I wrote something for you.

Andrew asked about what my first dance song would be and I told you I didn’t know. Then you asked if I could pick any song regardless of the person what would it be? It was supposed to be all your’n. I was supposed to hold you and dance to a song about loving you, and till my lungs give out, but now I don’t waste of breath on your name.

He asked me about an open bar at the wedding. We were supposed to have an open bar for four hours. We both would’ve had a signature drink just for us.

I gave all of me to you. I broke down every wall. Every bridge. Every single thing that I had put up to protect myself. And I let them all down for you. I love you so honestly and beautifully and for what? You didn’t see it. You didn’t see any of it. I reached into my chest and pulled out my heart for you to look at it and tell me it was damaged.

“ you need therapy”

“ you need medication”

Were you wrong? No.

But I changed my ways. I grew. I replace those old habits with new ones while you sat there and kept doing the same cycles that you always did. I watched you stop trying with yourself. I watched you stop trying with me.

We were supposed to get married. We were supposed to be in love forever. You were supposed to hold me at all the bad days and good days. You were supposed to be there when I fell. You weren’t.

I broke. And you were in bed. I was hyperventilating and you were sleeping. I was standing in front of you begging for something and you told me I was cheating on you.

I think that nights are so hard because it reminds me of the miles I would drive to see you. Craving you. Loving you.

As fast as I fell in love, I fell out I know I shouldn’t have even done it in the first place, but I regret nothing I don’t think in any lifetime we would’ve worked.

Did I think your love was never really true?

Maybe I do.

Keegan we had it all. We had the house, the ring, the family, and I thought the love. When I stopped to look at what we really had; it was nothing. No connection. No love. You were my best friend and I think that maybe that was all we ever could have been. That’s ok. It really is. You’re not a nice person. You took advantage of me and my heart. That’s not okay. That’s why I’m bitter. That’s why I’m mad. You will know just how not okay this was soon. I promise because, unlike you, I’m a woman of my word. I’m more of a man then you will ever be.

I wish you the best, truthfully, just after I make you regret hurting me.

Goodbye Keegan Kalies

Kate

[mental-mario]

Part IV: Let Me the Hell Out the Door!

It's been several days since I posted part 3, but that's because I was completely consumed with SMB Wonder! I absolutely love this game and will be happy to get more into a review of it later this week!

In the meantime, send me a friend request on Switch and let's play with each other! After all, I'm sick of playing with myself. My friend code is SW - 4419 - 5159 - 3401. You can also scan my profile pic's QR code.

Despite the highly interrupted sleep, I did manage to get some sleep. I was awoken again at 7:30am to have vitals taken as I am sitting edge of bed through teary and bloodshot eyes. I was then told breakfast was served, and so I stumbled out to eat some powdered eggs and sip a bit of coffee. One of the med students also came over and gave me an informal ADHD and a BPD assessment to complete.

Later in the morning, after I finished riding the pointless recumbent bike for 15 minutes, the psych team met with me again to tell me I would be discharged in the afternoon. As I had affirmative answers for all 9 items on the BPD assessment, they determine, brilliantly, that I have BPD. I could've told you that. In fact, I guess I did! They then told me I "likely" have ADHD as well but wanted my psych in the community to follow up with a "formal" assessment. He never did follow up on it, but my psychotherapist has diagnosed me ADHD amongst a host of others. I got 2 more diagnoses this morning, but that's for another post.

My spouse came to visit me again at 12, but nursing staff had already pulled me aside to commence my discharge. This process then included an hour of waiting because they brought me someone else's belongings and couldn't locate mine! My wife stood with me from 12-1, until she had to go pick up the kids from school, and she spent that time trying to keep me calm as I was fighting a panic attack over the notion of my wallet and phone being lost or stolen. Nursing didn't do anything to try and calm me during this time, and instead they had me move aside so they could take vitals on a new patient (this person would have been my roommate if I was staying the night again). Again, as I've asked hypothetically in previous posts, how all this was supposed to BENEFIT my mental health is still beyond me.

Around 1pm, the nurse finally produced my bag of stuff, which was apparently sitting in the ER the entire time. I was relieved to get my phone, keys, and wallet back, but despite having the rest of my clothing back, they managed to lose my shoes! I recall my shoes having been placed in a separate bag when I arrived, and I informed them of this. They then had someone go BACK to the ER (which is nowhere remotely close to my unit) to look for the shoes in question. This resulted in another hour of waiting, granted with less anxiety. During the wait, I sat in on another boring group session of some dumb game they were playing. During this, security pulls me aside and shows me a pic of a pair of shoes that aren't mine.

Resigned that my shoes are lost at this time, security gives me their number to contact them in a few days to inquire again, and I finally get cleared to discharge! In my hospital socks, I walked outside across the hospital campus to my car parked in the garage. When I got to my car, I realized they gave me a bottle of Prozac that I didn't need when they had instead told me they were going to discharge me with an increased dose of Wellbutrin.

They never did find my shoes.

If you have been hospitalized for mental illness, please share your story!

And please, if you're enjoying the blog, remember to tip your blogger! I want just the tip, my friends!

Next post will be my review of SMB Wonder because, after all, my take on it is far more important than any of these "professional" sites. I will also list my current diagnoses in ABC order, and if I have time in the next post, I will start delving into everyone's favorite topic: my mommy issues!

Until then, see you on Switch!

[witchygagirlwrites]

Detective Sexy

Kevin Atwater x Ruzek Sister Reader (Nicknamed Wonderland)

Who knew a barfight could end that good?

Smut

“Come on Wonderland! I need you babe” this was the third time Luna called you begging you to take the empty chair in her studio.You had to admit it was a tempting offer. “That would involve so much, I’d have to find a new place..let Adam know I’m coming home..probably talk to dad” you scrunched your nose up at that prospect.

She laughed lightly “Well good news on the place to live front. My neighbor is about to start moving out. It’s rent controlled, safer area and she’s an older lady moving into a retirement home. I could probably toss her a couple bills and talk her into leaving most of her furniture” you laughed “Oh my god are you seriously that freaking desperate to have me working in your place?” “YES!” she hollered in a fight of giggles.

You looked around your tiny one bedroom. You missed Chicago, you missed Adam. You missed your friends and just simply knowing everywhere. “Fine” “What?” she asked and you laughed “I said fine. I will take the empty chair in your studio Luna but I’m gonna need you to see about that furniture because most of what I have now is pretty fucking wrecked”

“Yes, of course. Anything you need” she agreed and you shook your head with a smile. “I’ll put in my two weeks with Angela and let her know I’m headed home”

Chicago was home. Love it or hate it. Your relationship with your dad was well shaky at best. You were the product of a one night stand. You had the last name Ruzek but that was all. Hell you were fairly certain over the years Adam’s mother had shown you more genuine affection than Bob even given the circumstances of your birth and she’d even been good to your mom. She’d helped with appointments and meds when your mom had gotten her cancer diagnosis then when it became clear that she wasn’t going to beat it she assured her that she would see you taken care of and she stuck by her word.

Adam on the other hand, you loved your big brother. He was your best friend in a lot of ways. You were the more chaotic of the two of you. The wild child. He was the one getting you out of the messes your mouth got you into. He was the cop, you were the one that most of your best stories involved shit that were semi illegal. 

The day you called him to let him know you were coming home you could practically hear the grin in his voice “My little sister is finally coming home?” you laughed and shook your head “Yes Adam. I’m on the road right now actually, talking to you through my truck speakers” he spoke to someone behind him then said “Al says hi” “Olinksky? Tell him I said hey” you met Al once when you’d managed to fly in to spend Thanksgiving with the family. 

You needed air from your father so you and Adam left along with his girlfriend Kim.You ended up at Al’s house. You met his wife and daughter Lexi. They were all pretty nice, you’d joked with him that any time he decided he wanted a tattoo to come see you and Lexi told you she would come see you as soon as she turned eighteen.

Adam had wanted you to meet more of the unit but you had to bounce the next morning because Angela had some black friday weekend thing going on and people were lining around the block to get inked. 

“Where are you gonna stay?” he asked so you told him about the place Luna found and he let out a low whistle “Lucky, that’s a decent neighborhood. I’ll be glad to have you home, even if that means I’ll be having to keep you out of trouble” you felt a grin slip onto your face “Oh come on Adam, you’ve been doing that since I broke mom’s lamp when I was five and you took the blame”

“Yeah my mom wouldn’t let me have any of my own birthday cake” he laughed. That was what you loved about Adam. It was none of that half sister crap with him if anyone asked. No you were just his sister, his crazy sister that he’d once compared to a rabid raccoon but still his sister. “Love you too Adam. I’ll call you when I hit Chicago and get my keys so you can come check my place out, ok?” “Ok, I’ll take you out for dinner too” he promised before you two said goodbye and you hung up.

It was good to be home. After a few weeks turned into a couple months it was like you never left. You had a routine set, scoped out your favorite coffee shops and bars. You loved working for Luna and your apartment was fucking awesome. Yeah you were glad you decided to make the move home. It was a good decision.

“Reports of a bar fight at the Magnus Tavern” came across the scanner in Kevin’s car. He glanced up and saw he was right around the corner so he shrugged and grabbed the radio “This is Detective Atwater with Intelligence show me responding” 

He rolled up to the bar and slipped his badge onto his belt before climbing out of his suv. When he headed for the door the first thing he clocked was that the bouncer wasn’t stepping in. “Yo man, do your damn job!” he hollered and the bouncer shrugged and pointed. Kevin turned in enough time to see a woman kick a man dead center in his crotch and when he doubled up she punched him in the throat and was rearing back to throw another punch when Kevin grabbed her hand “Woah lil mama. What’d he do?”

_____________________

You just wanted a drink with some friends, that was all. Some stupid bastard had to go and ruin it by calling Henri a slur when they saw him kissing Gary. They were going to let it go so you were going to let it go. That was until the drunk snatched Julia’s ponytail that was when you threw a drink in his face and heard someone yell for the cops as you slapped him.

“Fucking bitch” he growled so you drew your foot back and aimed with intentions to put your foot through him. When he doubled up you punched him in the throat and was about to hit him again when someone grabbed your arm. You spun around to defend yourself but froze when you looked up to meet a set of dark brown eyes belonging to the most gorgeous man you’d ever laid your eyes on “Woah lil mama. What’d he do?” he asked and you cut your eyes back at the man “The asshole was being a damn bigot then he assaulted my friend so I kicked his fucking ass”

A grin slipped onto his face as he looked at the man too and nodded slowly “Yeah, I’d say you did. What’s your name? I’m Detective Kevin Atwater. I work with intelligence” Oh shit, this was Adam’s friend Kevin.  You told him your name but instead of Ruzek you told him your last name was Daleson. Your mother’s name. “But everyone calls me wonderland” “Wonderland huh?” he grinned and you nodded.

He radioed another unit to retrieve the drunk off the floor after confirming your story with Julia and deciding to press charges himself. After the patrol left you slipped him your number and grinned “Call me when you get off” he raised an eyebrow “I will” so you winked at him “God I hope you do”

You were starting to think Kevin wasn’t going to call you until your phone flashed as you were cleaning up your work area around seven that evening. “Well hello detective” you answered with a grin and Kevin’s voice hit your ear “So, can I buy you dinner?” you grinned “You know where the Enchanted Rose Tattoo shop is?” “Yes ma’am” he replied so you said “I work there. Come pick me up”

________________

An hour later you were sitting across from Kevin at a diner that you’d picked. He was gorgeous and sweet and everything you wanted. “Kevin?” you asked and he grinned “Yeah Wonder?” you rolled your bottom lip between your teeth “Would you think any less of me if I asked you to come home with me? I don’t do that, honestly but you are just wow” you laughed and he grinned “Wow, huh? I think I may just have to come home with you in that case”

________________

You barely made it into your door before Kevin was picking you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he turned to press your back into the door. His lips caught yours in a heated kiss, tongue tasting your mouth and pulling a moan from you as your hands clawed at his shirt, trying to get it off. He pulled away from your mouth with a laugh “Use your words baby” and slipped his shirt off before leaning down to connect his lips to your neck, licking and teasing the soft flesh. Your head fell back against the door with a light thud. “Kev..Kevin..Fuck we gotta get to my bed here” he pulled back and grinned at you “What’s wrong little wonderland?”

You grinned “I want to feel all of you Atwater. I can’t do that against a door” he grinned and slowly slid you down to your feet “I don’t know the way and don’t want to risk hurting you. Next time best believe I’ll just carry you the whole way” “Next time?” you teased and he turned you towards the rest of the apartment so you could lead the way to your bedroom before smacking you playfully on the ass “Yeah cause I know there’s gonna be a next time”

You lead him into your room, stripping your shirt, bra and shoes along the way.You fell back onto the bed, pulling him along with you. He grinned against your lips as your hands slid along his chest, exploring the expanse of muscle. He kissed across your jaw then down your neck. When he kissed across your collarbone, licking the ink you had there you gasped lightly and he pulled away from your skin to say “When we’re through I’m gonna lay you out just to get a good look at your ink” you grinned “Sounds good to me”

He lowered his mouth back to your body, continuing his path down you. When he got to the waistband of your jeans he cut his eyes up at you and you nodded “Please” he reached for the snap and zipper before tugging them off your hips and throwing them across the room. Before you had time to even attempt a sarcastic reply he had your legs up on his shoulders and was slurping at your dripping cunt like a starving man offered a buffet.

Your hips bucked off the bed, grinding against his face subconsciously as a loud moan left you and your hands balled in the comforter of your bed. “Fuck fuck fuck” you moaned as he added a finger, curling it up into you then a second one. When he hit that spot deep inside of you with his fingers as his tongue flicked across your clit your orgasm slammed into you and you came, shaking slightly under him. He kept teasing at you until you were practically squirming away from him. 

He broke away from your clit, pressing a kiss to each of your inner thighs before crawling back up your body “Now I can see calling you wonderland” he teased and you shook your head “Come here” he grinned and let you pull him into a kiss. You turned the two of you so you were on top and he was on his back. His grin deepened when you straddled him “What ya gonna do?”

You left a lingering kiss to his lips before moving to leave a trail of kisses across his jaw then down his neck. His chest was so damn broad and muscled. It was a glorious thing just being able to touch it let alone having a chance to run your tongue and lips across it, hearing him groan underneath you.

When you got to his waist you cut your eyes up at him “Can you take the jeans off good looking?” he nodded “I can do that” and lifted his hips to quickly shove the jeans and boxers off.  You know your eyes widened when his hard cock slipped out because he chuckled lightly “You good Wonder?” you nodded before licking a solid strip from the base to the tip and his head fell back “Yeah, I’d say you’re damn good” he moaned as you leaned up to lower your mouth onto him, taking as much as you could in, using your hand to tease the rest.

His hands went to your hair, gathering it to hold out of your way. “Yeah baby, just like that” he praised and you groaned around him, causing his head to fall back. You only managed a few more seconds before he pulled you off and shook his head “I can’t handle much more of that or we both fixing to be disappointed in me”

You grinned and climbed up his body. When you straddled his waist and could feel his hard cock teasing at your inner thigh you asked “Recent clean test?” he nodded and raised an eyebrow so you nodded and added “IUD also” he grinned as you lifted up just enough to grip his cock and line it up with your opening. Your eyes fluttered close as you lowered yourself down onto him, a loud moan escaping your lips at the stretch. He gripped your hips tightly “Damn darlin” you opened your eyes after a second and smiled breathlessly at him “You feel fucking amazing Kev”

He laughed “Was gonna say the same” and reached up to push your hair back before folding you down to you “Damn I’d glad I responded to that damn call” he told you with a grin before turning the two of you so you were on your back and he was on top of you, the necklace he was wearing was now dangling. He kissed you almost gently before giving a slow roll of his hips, hitting that spot deep inside of you. You yelped out a moan of his name and he chuckled “I got you baby” and shifted his hips to pull one of your legs up, giving him an even deeper angle. 

Your hands went to his shoulders, fingers digging in as he found a rhyme that had you begging him, for what? You weren’t fucking sure but in that moment? That man could’ve gotten by with just about any request. You could feel that damn pressure building again with every snap of his hips. He held his weight up on one arm to press a kiss to your lips “Feel so good Wonder, fuck” he groaned.

“Right there Kev” you moaned as his fingers slipped down to your clit, teasing at it in rhythm with his thrusts and when you felt that pressure burst you cried out his name when your orgasm washed over you, thighs clenching down on his waist. He snapped his hips into you a few more times before burying himself to the hip and you felt when he came, some of it being pumped back out. He pressed a kiss to your lips “That was amazing” he laughed slightly and you grinned “Took the words out of my mouth”

He slowly pulled out, apologizing when you whimpered pathetically. He pressed another kiss to your lips, eyes linger on your center “Where’s your bathroom? Need to get a rag to clean you up?” you motioned to the bathroom so after a moment he came back with a warm rag and cleaned you up, spreading your legs apart with a grin that honestly probably made you clench around air.

“Need anything?” he asked and you shook your head “Can you stay for a minute?” he nodded “I can stay until you kick me” you shrugged, eyes trailing over him “Let’s see what my quota on unbelievably sexy men wanting to be in my bed is…oh yeah just you” he shook his head and slid into the bed next to you before pulling you over onto his chest, lips brushing against yours “So, this gonna become something?” he asked and you nodded “I hope so” 

How you were gonna keep you being his best friend’s sister a secret may be hard but fuck, it would be worth it. You curled up on his chest,  and before long was dozing off. “Stay till morning?” you asked and he laughed, pressing a kiss to the side your head “I can manage that”

Yeah you owed Luna a major favor for talking your ass into coming home to Chicago if it led to Detective Kevin Atwater,even if Adam was going to get pissed.

@desimarie12

[witnessme-shinyandchrome]

Letters About My Mother #4

I feel like having to tell your mother that 'I'm not my brothers keeper' multiple times is..... not good. But I've had to tell her and remind her multiple times. It's worse now that she lives with us.

Before I ever moved in with him, My Sister-in-Law told me I should, so i could keep him from drinking so much. And I could help him keep the house clean. I just said 'Uh-huh' and moved on. My mother brought it up again later. I told her I wasnt his wife, his girlfriend, or his mother. It's not my job to manage him.

Now that I have moved in, she comes to me with questions about him. And not in a, He wont talk to me, you should tell me what he's hiding way. All the questions she lays before me, he would easily answer. But she never asks him first.

A while back she texted me, 'When is his vision insurance up?'

'Why would I know that' I responded. she didnt have an answer for me. Considering what I know, it's that she cant understand the idea that I wont do emotional labour for the men in my life. She has always had to coddle the men in her life. Her various husbands. Her sons.

Last week she came to me about his dog, who is adorable, and I love her very much.

'She needs new flea meds' she said, standing over me where i sat on the couch. I look up at her.

'Ok?'

'Did he get her the one month or the three month last time?'

'I have no clue. Why dont you ask him?'

'Didn't you go with him?'

'No? I dont hold his hand when he does things.'

The conversation ended there. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. She does subscribe to the 'Man of the house' idea. But even so, he is a grown man.

She has always been deeply misogynistic. She used to love the idea, Women are just as strong and capable as men. But I see it's actually, I'M just as strong and capable as men. The classic Republican Exception.

She managed to pass that idea on to me. I finally started really dissecting it in my late teens. I too had the idea, 'women are stupid shallow little creatures who have never had an original thought. Except Me, I'm not like those Other Girls.'

We all inherit those belief systems from the people around us, especially our parents. I managed to escape from most of the racism and homophobia, but the misogyny really latched in deep.

Likely because I really hated myself as a kid. I hated myself, but my misogynistic beliefs required that i was better than other girls. Therefore, they really were terrible.

Eventually I pulled myself from that pit. Its... sad to look back and see how blind and hateful you once were. But my mother still clings to it. Now she's trying to get me to mediate between them.

My brother and her have talked about selling his house. Moving to a different state. If they go through with it..... I'll have to make a decision. Go with them and be even more trapped and entangled in a family relationship I already dream of escaping.

Or stay, and lose a place to live. A support system. The only path I've ever known. In a previous letter I talked about running away. But it feels different being the one left behind, instead of the one leaving.

[takeeachdayonebookatatime]

Why did you elbow me? 136

Achilles Castle part 41 the cardiologist appointment.

Kate: pov this whole week has been slow since i'm stuck doing paperwork. I arrive at work early before the boys. Castle has a meeting at black pawn today. Esposito is planning a little getaway for him and Lanie, I told him Castle has no problem with you staying at the Hamptons house after everything Lanie has done for me she is more than welcome.

Kate: pov I have a Dr's appointment coming up. Castle is going to go with me, Lanie has something that day some medical examiner thing

Castle: pov Kate is making a fantastic pumpkin soup for dinner. Alexis is setting the table, Martha is filling our cups with water. We chat about life, school and work. Kate's upcoming Dr's appointment is just a check up to make sure everything is okay. Alexis is upstairs studying, me and Kate are watching a movie. Kate has been having a little trouble sleeping lately. It might be the new medicine.

Ryan: pov we just closed a very difficult homicide case. The boyfriend poisoned her drink so she died after him and he would not be blamed for her murder.

Alexis : pov today is Kate's appointment which she got the day off of work for. Lanie usually goes with her or dad does. Kate is eating some oatmeal saying she has already showered and taken her pills. I head into her room to help her by grabbing her new medicine that goes into her pod since today is the day she gets it. She takes this medicine once a week. I ask Kate if it's easier to lay on the bed while I access her pod and inject the meds into it. Lanie showed us how to do it. Since my dad is injured I don't think he would be able to do it.

Castle: pov i kiss her on the forehead before we leave. The drive to Dr Burkett office is short, 15 minutes later and her name is being called. Kate is getting a stress test, EKG and an echocardiogram today. A nurse takes Kate's vitals, first is the EKG. The nurse puts the leads on Kate's body and starts the machine. She mentions it is coming up slightly elevated like usual since Kate's heart beats faster than normal. Next is the stress test, Kate has to run on a treadmill while hooked up to a heart monitor. She managed to pass this one. The Echocardiogram Dr Burkett does himself, he squirts the very cold gel on Kate's chest and moves the wand around he points out her scar tissue on her ventricle, pericardium, pulmonary vein and chest.

Kate: pov I mention I think the new medicine is making it hard for me to sleep, Dr Burkett mentions that since my heart beats faster than normal i'm more likely to have episodes of ventricular tachycardia which could lead to vfib or cause cardiac arrest. Also when I'm sick my heart has to work harder than normal and the black licorice almost killed me. He wants to put me on some meds to help my immune system get stronger.

Dr Burkett: pov I tell Kate her antiarrhythmic meds work great at preventing arrhythmias and her emergency heart meds work great at stopping her arrhythmia but it does not help slow her heartbeat down. I know Kate is not going to want to hear this. I suggest we keep her on the new medicine for a bit. Just to give her heart some help so it doesn't have to beat so fast all the time. I also tell Kate there are a few things we can do, one is a type of Catheter Ablation Therapy to remove some of the scar tissue on her heart. The others are an implantable cardiac defibrillator or a pacemaker.

Kate: pov it sounds scary he explains the Catheter Ablation and icd are the ones he recommends for my condition. It consists of radiofrequency energy hitting my scar tissue to stop the source of my arrhythmia. A small surgical incision might be needed on my chest to gain access to my heart to get rid of the scar tissue. The other one requires an icd device, to be placed under my skin. No way I'm having that procedure done, I have severe PTSD from my shooting and cardiac arrest. He says it looks like you will be on arrhythmia medication for the rest of your life. The thing is PTSD causes heart palpitations and since you have ventricular tachycardia, it makes it so much worse. I have a serious question: Dr Burkett, my husband here has an adult daughter and I just wanted to know what my options are for expanding our family.

Dr Burkett: pov well Kate to be honest I don't think a pregnancy would be safe for you with your heart condition, that would be a lot of stress on your heart and you have a lung that has collapsed before. I suggest you get a MUGA scan. It will tell us how well your heart is pumping/working. I tell her I will schedule the scan for her. If she really wants to expand her family then she needs to see a high risk obgyn and see what they say, because I don't think it's safe for her. I also would like to schedule her for a sleep study. I tell her I will call her when there is an opening for the scan and sleep study.

Castle: pov I explain to her the importance of both the procedures. Dr Burkett says to Kate talk it over with your husband. This probably won't get rid of your heart problem, because of how severe your previous trauma was. But will make your heart episodes less frequent. since you have a high chance for your ventricular tachycardia turning into Vfib/cardiac arrest.

Kate: pov Castle grabs all the info packets the Dr hands me. I decide instead of going out to eat we are heading straight to the loft. On the way home he picks up my new meds.

Castle: pov I quickly text Lanie a heads up/warning her that it did not go great. Her cardiologist is recommending Kate have a Catheter Ablation procedure on her scar tissue and a possible icd device inserted. Lanie says she will be by later, In the fridge I look for something for Kate to eat. To be continued. …….

[themultifandomgal]

Antonio- Pregnancy Alphabet

A= Announcement (When/How do you announce your pregnant to you boss, co-workers, friends?):

We decide to tell Eva and Diego a week after finding out. We bought them a T-shirt with 'big brother' and 'big sister' on. They took it well and both are excited to have a baby sibling.

Next we decided to tell Jay, Will and Gabby a month after we found out I was pregnant with a cup that says 'worlds best aunty' and 'worlds best uncle 1/2'.

Eventually we told everyone else when I was 3 months pregnant by putting it on social media.

B= Baby Predictions (Who will the baby be more like?):

Antonio has a bet at work that baby will be a girl, she will have have his hair colour and eyes. He has also put a bet on how heavy he things the baby will be when they're born- 8lbs and 6oz. Me however I've said the baby will be a girl with my hair and eye colour.

C= Cravings (What cravings do you have? ):

Fruit, especially juicy fruit like watermelon and oranges.

D= Due Date (When is the Due date?):

Baby is due on the 12th September

E= Emergencies (How do they act when something happens during the pregnancy?):

Early on in my pregnancy I had found some spotting. Obviously Antonio and I were scared that we we're having a miscarriage so he rushed me to the hospital with the sirens on. On arrive he worriedly ran to Maggie to tell her what was happening. While I was being checked over Antonio was pacing around which only made me more nervous until Nat gave the oh so sweet words that everything was ok.

F= Falling (How do they react you falling or about to fall?):

At 5 months pregnant I slipped coming down the steps at home. Diego was the first one to me, making sure I'm ok as Antonio was at work. I told him not to ring, but Diego of course rang his father meaning that Antonio came home frantic, insisting he takes me to Med. I managed to persuade him in just letting Will come over and check me.

G= Gender(s) (What gender do they want the baby to be?):

After finding out I was pregnant we both got so excited that we have talked about having more children after. Antonio isn't bothered what we have but I want one of each, not caring which way around they come.

H= Hands (Do they like to place their hands on your tummy? Do you place your hands on your tummy?):

Before I started to feel the baby move Antonio wouldn't place his hands on my tummy knowing that he wouldn't be able to feel the baby. One my stomach grew Antonio would place his hands hoping to feel the baby move. He was so happy when he felt the baby move.

I always place my my hands on my tummy whenever I feel the baby move or kick.

I= Illness (How do they react when you get sick?):

As I near the end of my pregnancy I catch a sickness bug. Obviously I struggle to get to the bathroom to throw up so Antonio took a couple days off work to look after me.

J= Job (Do you stay at work? Are you allowed to stay at work?):

I stay at work until summer break, then technically start my maternity leave after summer break.

K= Kisses (Do they like kissing your bump?):

Antonio doesn't really kiss my bump very often. Only later on in the pregnancy.

L= Life (How has life changed while your pregnant?):

For Antonio it's not really changed having done this before, but for me this is all new. Juggling work, Antonio, Diego and Eva with the pregnancy has been tiring. I'm the one to be stressed out, Antonio is very calm.

M= Movement (How do they react to feeling the baby move? How do they react to the sight of the baby kicking?):

Antonio loves everything, getting excited with each milestone, me however, I find it super odd the first time I felt the baby move or see the baby kicking.

N= Nesting (Do you start nesting? When do you start nesting?):

It all started at work. I had to make sure my room was tidy and organised and the kids put everything back where it belongs. At home Antonio makes sure it's tidy all the time so not to make me frantically clean.

O= Outfits (When do you start buying maternity clothes? When do you start buying outfits for the baby?):

One I started to show and my pants wouldn't fit I started shopping for maternity clothes. As soon at I hit 3 months both Antonio and I start shopping for clothes for the baby.

P= Parents (When do you tell your/their parent/s. Do they give advice? Is it good advice?):

We tell his parents after I hit 3 months pregnant. Knowing that his parents (particularly his dad) wouldn't be impressed, Antonio told them that they had a choice and they had to stick by it. Either be grandparents to the baby and accept us, or they won't be apart of our lives. He mother agreed to our terms but his dad walked out of our house.

Q= Questions (Do they ask the midwife a lot of questions. Do they keep asking if your ok?):

No. He's been here before and knows what pregnancy is like.

R= Risk (Is there any risks during the pregnancy?):

No.

S= Sickness (Do they you have much morning sickness? When does it start? When does it stop?):

I had morning sickness for the first few months of pregnancy, it was pretty normal, came in waves and thankfully wasn't all day.

T= Talking to the Baby (Do they talk to the bump? Do you talk to the bump?):

Antonio likes to tell the baby stories about they're big brother and sister and how excited we all are to meet him/her.

U= Upset (How do they act when your upset? Why do you cry over most?)

Whenever I'm upset Antonio just gives me my craved food that day and cuddles me.

V= Vision as in Supervision (Do they keep a close eye on you? Do they make sure someone's always with you?):

Of course. Antonio trusts me that I will tell him if somethings wrong, but he still likes to check up on my during the day, whether that be a phone call or text.

W= What's the plan? (What is the birthing plan?):

Hospital birth with all the drugs!

X= Xray or Ultrasound (How do they react to seeing an x-ray of the baby. Do they tear up when they see the ultrasound?):

I wasn't sure what I was looking at in all honesty, but Antonio pointed out where the baby was, where the head and feet where. After seeing the baby he's even more excited that he was before.

Y= Yearning (How do they truly feel about having a child? Do they feel as though they are ready for a baby?):

Antoni has been excited from the moment I told him I was pregnant, I however have been more nervous and worried about being ready. Will I hold the head right? Will I be a good mum. Antonio though has been great and squashed all those worries.

Z= ZZZ (How much sleep do they get during the pregnancy? How much sleep do you get?):

We both slept like a baby! Baby seemed to know my body clock- asleep by 10pm awake at 7.