28gaugeshotgunshells

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

I'm not asking for a lot of money, I just need a little to buy bread and some vegetables for my kids and milk and diapers for my baby Sama. 💔🙏

My campaign is verified by @gazavetters, (#334)

https://www.gofundme.com/f/struggle-of-a-mother-for-survival

Please support them as well!

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

Hello 👋,

I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞

The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔

Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊

Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉

https://gofund.me/58268669 🔗

Please send this person support!

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

this place is farts

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

HOME ALONE

Carl Grimes x GN! Reader

---------- 1.2k words Disclaimers: Slightly suggestive but nothing over-board, making out, awkward teens. Sypnosis: Sneaking into his room. ---------- The only thing heard in the temporarily adult-deserted Grimes abode that evening was the sound of soft scrambled footsteps accompanied by creaks from the houses staircase. Everything inside was still and dark that night, save for you and Carl sneaking into a room together and switching on his bedside lamp's light.

Instantly the appliance brightens up the room with it's own yellow hue, and with this newfound light you're finally able to see the smitten boyish grin on Carl's face. The rush of sneaking you into his room was clearly still fresh in your minds; both of you now feeling a new sort of anticipation and teenage hormonal rush coursing about.

Your eyes tail him as he makes sure to lock the door, no one was supposed to be around for a good while, but it never hurt to be careful. As the door locks with a clearly identifiable clicking noise, you plop your butt down on the bed behind you. Though still sitting up, you lounge back and a bit and allow your fingers to feel the material of his blanket.

Carl's blanket was nice.

Soft and smooth.. your body shifts in attempt to examine the rest of his bed, but your view gets blocked by Carl taking a seat next to you. Not that you minded him interrupting though. You didn't think you could ever get tired of looking at him, as cheesy as it may be to express out loud.

Something about the way his blue eyes held you with complete and utter affection told you that the feeling was mutual.

"Sorry," He breaks the silence with a half-hearted apology that slowly melts into a light embarrassed chuckle. "My room's a bit of a mess." Your gaze flicks around his self-proclaimed "mess" of a room, sure there were a few things visible in the minimal light provided by his lamp that happened to be strewn about; like a shirt resting on the top of a chair. But it wasn't horrible, not worse than what your room looked like sometimes.

"Don't worry about it, I don't mind." You reply softly, eliciting a nod of somewhat relieved acknowledgement from Carl.

And then the awkward silence returns to the room. Neither one of you really quite sure what to say or do with this.. privacy. The two of you had both practically grown up through the apocalypse, consequently neither of you had gotten a chance to explore anything romantically intimate. You'd kissed once before, it was short.. chaste. Neither of you had really been the best at it though. Practice was definitely needed.

The air between you buzzes with a sort of tension you can't quite name, and the seconds drag on and on, feeling longer than they should've.

Suddenly, you feel Carl's fingers brush across yours. His hand is nicely warm as it gently pries your own open and his fingers intertwine with yours. You look upwards at him in time to see smittenness making it's way onto his countenance again.

"So.." He murmurs, leaning in closer to you, close enough that you can feel his breath wafting onto your cheek.

Your heart rate picks up, and you feel your face growing hotter. Here goes nothing, right?

You squeeze Carl's hand a bit with your own as your other one goes up to rest on the back of his head, to which Carl slowly follows suit with by wrapping his arm around your waist. Your eyes flutter closed as your lips finally met his for an experimental first kiss.

You could feel your whole body heating up now as your lips moved a tad sloppily against his, in a strange form of inexperienced passion. Though, sooner than not you break away.

"WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE IM KISSING SOME BUTTCHEEKS!" You break away from the kiss.. letting the compulsive thoughts win.

"UGH! CAN YOU STOP BEING NUTTIER THAN A SQUIRREL TURD!" Carl growls. "WHAT CARL! STOP BEING REDNECK LIKE YOR DADDAHY!!" And then you heard it.

Two bangs, and then three, coming straight from the other side of Carl's door. Quickly the two of you JUMPED UP, in order to look in surprise at the door on the other side of the room, listening to the bangs that continued to happen on the door.

You half expected to hear someone shouting at Carl to open it, but that never happened. In fact, the knob had never even been tried. There was just.. random disorganized banging on the door. Your brows furrow as you look over at Carl, who returns you a look of 'I have absolutely no idea what that is'. The knocks never stop, only growing increasingly louder and violent. You can almost feel yourself getting a bit frightened, was it a walker? Was Alexandria getting overrun again?

You notice Carl getting up from the bed and reaching for his knife, "Be careful..!" You waste no time in whispering back to him as he treads towards the door. As he stands in front of the door, a beat filled with the sound of continued loud thumping passes. And then, quick as ever Carl unlocks the door and throws it open, his knife in hand raised defensively clearly ready for anything.

But nothing's there. Or at least you thought so, because the following thing you hear is the sound of something falling down the stairs. Seriously, what the hell was that?!

And then you hear a high pitched scream. "WAHH! WAHH!! WAH!"

"CARL WHAT IS THAT!" YOU YELL.

"OH SHIT!!" Carl shouts as he quickly jumps out of the door frame area to look down the stairs..

THE BABY CRYING CONTINUES!! AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRCASE.. IS JUDITH ON HER ASS!! THAT LITTLE MF ESCAPED HER CRIB AND WAS TRYNA BUST INTO CARLS ROOM!! NOW SHE WAS UGLY CRYING AND PROBABLY WAKING UP ALL THE ALEXANDRIAN RESIDENTS!!

"AWE.. JUDITH.. ITS OK.. ITS OK!!" CARL TRIES TO CALM HER DOWN BUT IT IS CLEARLY NOT WORKING AS SHE LETS OUT AN ANGRY DEMON SCREECH AND A LOUD SMACK IS HEARD...

"OW!!!!!!!!" CARL SAYS.

THEN JUDITH KEEPS CRYING.

"SHH!! JUDITH SHUTUP!! YOU'RE GONNA GET ME IN TROUBLE!!!" CARL SHOUTS.

"AWE NAW IM NOT TAKING THE FALL FOR THIS!!" YOU SAY VERY PANICKED. "GOTTA GET RID OF THE EVIDENCE!"

YOU RUN OUT OF CARLS ROOM DOOR AND PUSH HIM DOWN THE STAIRS, HOPING HE'LL FALL AND BREAK HIS NECK AND THEN HIS BIG FAT BUTT WILL SUFFOCATE JUDITH AND NO ONE WILL BE AROUND TO WITNESS THAT YOU WERE HERE!! YOU PUT YOUR PALMS ON HIS GYATT AND THEN GIVE THE BIGGEST PUSH OF YOUR LIFE!!

"AH! (NAME)! WHA!!" CARL SCREAMS LIKE A GIRL BEFORE HE GOES ROLLING DOWN THE STAIRS AND THEN HE FALLS RIGHT ONTO JUDITH!! THE STAIRCASE ALMOST BREAKS COMPLETELY FROM UNDER HIM.

YOU DONT WAIT AROUND TO SEE HOW THAT TURNS OUT.. INSTEAD YOU RUN FULL SPEED AT CARLS BEDROOM WINDOW AND THEN JUMPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GLASS SHATTERS AND YOU HIT THE GROUND WITH A LOUD OOF ON YOR END!

"OH SNIPPITY BIBITY BAP!!" You cry. "MY BUMHOLE!" your butt really hurts because you fell on it.

and then a bright light blinds you!! "OW!" You scream, trying to see... what was happening!! why was it so bright!! and then you realized some bitch was shining a flashlight in your eyes!

YOU COVER YOUR EYES WITH YOUR HANDS... AND YOU MAKE OUT RICK THROUGH THE LIGHT + DARKNESS. oh shit!!

"(Name..) why're yew flyin' out Coral's windohw.." Rick whispers... "nd why is thare a poop next to yer buutt.."

then rick points the flash light down.. and you see a poop.. next to your butt...

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

guys let me cook on this one

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

may i please request some carol peletier fic ?

something angsty pretty pls

“i can’t keep acting like i don’t see something is wrong with you?” carol to reader

Two Drifters

S5! Carol Peletier x GN! Reader

angst, a little over 1k words

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "I can't keep acting like I don't see that something's wrong with you." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Being in Alexandria was mind boggling. No more than three days ago had you been cold and starving, lucky to get a little water to drink let alone shower in it, constantly having the ravenous flesh eating infected on your trail. Yet now you found yourself fretting over what to wear to a party. It was almost completely insane to you how different your world had been from the people inside these walls.. How you were expected to just, integrate seamlessly into this community. You didn't think you could ever let go of the horrors you experienced out there; did you even want too?

Your lover leans back on the doorway, arms folded neatly over her chest as her eyes look you over. "Have you picked something out yet?" She asks, her tone soaked in a gentleness reserved for just a few.

"No." Your reply is short and straight to the point, you'd rather wallow in your own misery of moving on than talk to anyone.

Yet now your mind was on her.

Carol.

You loved her, and yet.. you'd grown to feel so distant from her. The both of you were so close at the prison, and then terminus and post-terminus had put you through the gutter. Now it felt like Alexandria was going to be the complete and utter kiss of death for your relationship.

Nowadays she never let you in on what was on her mind, and she kept acting weird. You got the impression she was starting to hide things from you, maybe she already had been. One thing was for sure, she had to be scheming something.

Or maybe the paranoia you'd developed originally to help you survive was starting to seep into everything you thought about. "Well," Carol approaches you from behind, arms falling from her chest to relax at her side for a moment before they raise up again and wrap around your midriff. Shortly after she embraces you from behind, you feel her chin rest on your shoulder. "The yellow one seems like it'd suit you." She practically purrs in your ear. You look at the one she recommends you, laying slightly ruffled on the bed below. It'd suit you huh? Such a pale, innocent shade of yellow.. something as so could never suit you, not with how dirtied you'd become. Even so, you'd worn worse than a color that was too good for you; the yellow would do just fine. "Yeah, sure." You reply dismissively, breaking away from her seemingly affectionate hold in order to grab the top below. She calls out your name, and you acknowledge it barely with a nod of your head. This however clearly isn't a good enough response for her as she calls out your name once more.

"Look at me." Her whisper to you borders on the edge of being a desperate plea.

"Why?" You murmur back, countenance scrunched up defensively sad.

"Because, I can't keep acting like I don't see that something's wrong with you." Her answer comes out in a raised voice, her frustration coming out of her love for you. The care she holds for your well-being.

You stand there, not stunned but epiphanized.

CRASH

You finally turn around to Carol, just barely seeing her concern for a lover melt into a much more serious expression.

"What was that?" You ask in a cautiously lowered tone. "I don't know, but it sounded like a window breaking downstairs." She mutters, wasting no time on reaching back and pulling the knife from her jean pocket.

You follow slowly behind her as she stalks out of the upstairs bedroom and down the stairs, you're both careful to not accidentally make anything creak. When you finally safely reach the bottom it's revealed that the living room window was the source of the crash. Shards are sprawled all out across the table below the window as well as the floor, a larger rock was also on the ground.. whoever had done this must've thrown it through.

What the hell?

As you slowly start to come out of your thoughts, you notice Carol's left your side and is now approaching the kitchen, where you can now hear quiet noises of shuffling around. You take in a breath as you prepare for anything.. picking up stepping behind Carol again.

And then you see it.

THAT ONE RANDOM LITTLE BOY!

"Sam?!" Carol exclaims, in confusion and annoyance.

THAT LITTLE SHIT WAS DIGGING INTO THE COOKIES CAROL HAD JUST MADE!! THERE WAS CRUMBS ALL OVER HIS MOUTH AND EVERYTHING! HALF OF THE COOKIES WERE ALREADY GONE!!

"THOSE WERE FOR THE PARTY YOU BASTARD BITCH!" Carol shouts.

"daddy says only women can be bitches.." Sam says back.

"UM!?!?" YOU EXCLAIM.

"GIVE ME THOSE COOKIES!!" Carol goes to rescue the food but then Sam quickly shoves every last one in his mouth and swallows them whole.

"WHAT THE FUCK! WHOS KID IS THIS!!" You scream, your hands flying up to hold your head in shock.

"Sam!! Why did you break into our house!? WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST KNOCK ON THE DOOR DAMMIT!!" Carol asks all mad.

"Tip toe... through the window..." Sam replies.

"OHH SO YOU'RE THE ONE BLASTING THAT SONG AT 3AM AND INTERRUPTING MY FUCKING SLEEP." You shout.

"oh uh uhohh uh I gotta.. I gotta poop." Sam says, "better out than in." And his face scrunches up.

"NOT ON MY FLOOR SAM! NOT ON THE FLOOR!" Carol yells.

and then you proceed to hear the loudest fart ever its so huge your eardrums almost pop! IT WAS SO INSANE NUCLEAR!! and then the second wave hit.. the smell.. it was so bad.. like a million dead walkers covered in poop and fish.. you could've died from the smell..

but then you remember.. that you're actually allergic to farts.. oh no...

Carol turns around sadly and in shock because she knows you can die from smelling a fart.. and this one was so bad.. "(name).. no.. hold on..."

You fall to the floor..

Sam waves the fart stench away from his nose. "Phew hoo boy that's a stinky sally if I've ever smelled one."

YOU DIE!! CAROL FALLS TO THE GROUND AND VIOLENTLY CRIES. "NOW I SEE THAT SOMETHING IS REALLY WRONG WITH YOU!!" SHE SHOUTS

meanwhile

Distantly Jessie is doing the dishes and she hears the echo of a really bad fart.

"Uh oh I think that was a Sam fart.." She says to Ron beside her.

"that shit stinky." Ron replies.

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

Hey everyone, I was on a mini leave for a minute there but I am back now for requests <3 !

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD

.- TWD, Rick Grimes x F!Reader x Shane Walsh -. part two

__________ A/N: Oh my gosh! I was trying to edit the original and I mis-clicked and deleted it, so here's the re-uploaded version. Thank you all again for your support. This is the second part to TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD! It's recommended that you read that one first for the best experience. __________

It's quiet for a moment, Glenn merely staring at you in a haze of confused surprise. He opens his mouth to speak, and yet nothing comes out; the only audible noise around remains the swooshes of the country breeze. "You mean.. a pregnancy test?" He finally asks, gentle brows furrowed in confusion. "I-.." You pause, before taking in a breath and slowly nodding your head. "Yes. I'd really appreciate if you could.. be discreet about going out and getting that for me."

"YOU'RE PREGNANT!!?!" Glenn suddenly shouts super loud! Goddamn!! Bro could not keep a secret for shit what the fuck!!

"SHUT YOUR FACE GLENN! SHUTUP!!" You shout, covering his mouth with your hand.

"WHAUHOK!!" His voice comes out all muffled, and after giving him the bitch fit death glare for ten seconds you take your hand off.

"YOU! GO GET ME IT NOW!! AND YOU DONT TELL ANYONE!! or else you'll wake up outside of the shitty ass farm fence that doesn't do anything to protect us... and you'll be all alone.. and when you cry no one will hear you.. except the monsters will hear you.. and then they'll eat you up.. or whatever the hell Carol says.. I mean me.. I mean GO GET ME MY SHIT!!!!"

"Um ok." Glenn replies. Then there is silence... and then it smells really bad.

"Awe man.. silent fart." Glenn whispers as he turns around in disappointment and walks off. "OH WAIT! AM GONNA BRING MAGGIE!" He suddenly shouts.

"WHAT NO GLENN! DONT YOU FUCKING DARE! I SAID KEEP IT A SECRET!!!" You shout.

"AM GOING TO GO GET MAGGIE!" Then Glenn runs off!! that little shit!!

You shake your head in anger and then walk off, that fat hoe better bring you back your pregnancy test! You walk back to the residential camp part of the farm, side eyeing Hershel's house as you went. Why did those fat hoes make you sleep outside.. and why was Rick okay with being so hobo.

You miss TV and sitting on the couch.

You let out a large sigh as you walk, but then are interrupted by the sound of distant giggling. You look over and see Carl showing Shane a rock.

"Um, buddy that's gross don't be doin' that." Shane says, his voice heavily southern accented.

Carl says something but you can't hear it over the sound of your inner rage!! SHANE NEEDS TO STAY AWAY FROM YOUR BOY.

Suddenly you bolt over. "HEY! You need to stay away from him!!" You shout at Shane.

Shane frowns at you. "Listen I-"

"Hey mom look-" Carl tries to say.

"NO! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT SHANE!" You shout back.

"hey mom."

"I wasn't trying to-" Shane attempts to interject.

"mom."

"I DON'T CARE! GET AWAY!" You hiss.

"MOM!!" Carl shouts at the top of his lungs as he shoves a rock in your face.

"WHA-" Your eyes finally focus on the rock.. it.. says poop on it.. and the poop is written with some weird brown substance.. Carl pulls it back and starts laughing his ass off, he laughs so hard that blood starts spurting out of his nose and onto you.

"AHAHAAH- AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He exclaims.

"OH DAMMIT! CARL!" Shane tries to help but you give him the 'gtfo!!' look and he leaves. And so, you deal with Carl's bloody nose all by yourself, and wait for the return of Glenn. But his ass is taking forever.. so you get mad. and take matters into your own hands. You storm up to Dale's RV.

"Oh hey (name)ie poo." Dale coos, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

"Hi dale!" You say very passive aggressively. "Guess what! There's this cloud outside that looks exactly like my toes!"

Dale practically jumps out of the RV and starts aggressively looking all over the sky. You take this moment of distraction to steal one of the guns off the counter and shove it in your pants. You then quickly get out of the RV like you didn't do anything. "

WHERE! WHERE?!" Dale shouts at you.

"I FORGOT!!" You yell back as you run away to the car area.

Dale doesn't even ask you why you're running because he's so obsessed with looking for that one cloud in the sky. You let out a loud phew noise as you head up to the cars. You tap your chin as you look them over. "Hmmm..."

They all look hobo so you let out an angry sigh and just pick the yellow one. You hop in and turn the keys that were in the ignition for whatever reason and then you drive off at full speed. As you drive into town for the pregnancy test you wonder what the hell is taking Glenn and Maggie so long.

--------------

meanwhile

"Hey Glenn."

"What's up, Maggie?"

"English or Spanish?"

--------------

NYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. That is the sound of your car driving. "oh yeah I love driving." You say BEFORE HITTING SOME WAKLKER AND HAVING YOUR CAR GO FLYING WHAM!!! You scream and are so scared before everything goes dark..

--------------

Back at the farm, it's gotten really dark. Shane is a stubborn bitch so he's looking around for you because he wants to talk...

"Pookie?" Shane calls out, then he gasps. "POOKIE IS MISSING!"

--------------

Later on you wake up in the dark!

"Rrraaghh.. raggghh!!"

"SHUTUP CARL! I'M TRYNA SLEEP!" You shout instinctively as your eyes shoot open. Your head hurts like a motherfucker, and you can hardly see.

Your eyes take a minute to adjust to the dark.. but when they do.. you see some fat walkur trying to get at you through the windshield!!

"NAH! BROS CLAWING AT ME LIKE IM AN ALL YOU CAN EAT BUFFET!" You exclaim looking at the big daddy- you mean.. walker.. trying to eat you!! why was it kinda bad though... You think as uour face gets all hot and warm.. like really hot and warm like you had a fever or something... and then you kind of start sweating..

You quickly push those thoughts out of your head because you remember you are a married woman!! you can't have two affairs on your hands!! oopsie poopsie!

Quickly you do some really cool moves and grab your gun somehow and then you shoot the walker, the gunshot being so close hurts the shit outta your ears but like mama raised a fighter not a bitch or whatevr so you climb outta dat car and get running away!! back to the farm!! After a minute of running though you got kind of exhausted so you stopped to catch your breath.. and then you just started walking.

About like 30 minutes passed when you saw headlights nearing and you were like NAH!! who's that!!! and so you were about to jump behind a tree but then you heard a distant "LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING!"

And you were like oh!! So when the car approached you hopped in!!

Shane spoke your name firmly, "What in the world are you doing out here?" He then asked.

But you didn't want to deal with his whiny clingy bullshit so you were like UMMM!! and then you pulled him in for a kiss!! OOPSIE POOPSIE!! then you pulled back and smacked him across the face.

"UGH IM MARRIED WHAT THE HELL!!"

"wHAT YOU KISSED ME!"

"DRIVE ME HOME NOW!!" Then you rode back in silence... When you got back to the farm it was pitch black, but everyone was outside of Hershel's house in a circle.. this was either the start of singing campfire songs and then participating in a crazy dance circle.. or you were getting an intervention.

You get out of the car before Shane and then run up to the circle because you just spotted Glenn. Shane follows shortly after you. You give Glenn the death stare before you look back at the others.

"GUYS WHAT IS GOING ON." You shout.

"No, wut is goin' on wit you!" Rick replies. "You were missin'! Where did you go?"

"I was OUT. okay." You reply, looking away from him.. you didn't want to tell him why you left...

"OUT doin' WUT!? Cheatin' on me again!?" Rick claps back.

EVERYONE GASPS!! and stares at you in shock.

"EXCUSE ME!? HOW DARE YOU! I NEVER DID THAT." You shout.

"I'm not stewpid..." Rick replies, shaking his head.

"mommy what test did you cheat on.. you're gonna have to retake it now.." Carl whispers.

"UM! SPEAKING OF TESTS! (NAME) IS PREGNANT!!" Glenn suddenly shouts.

"WHAT THE FUCK GLENN!"

"UM UM!! I CANT KEEP SECRETS!" Glenn cries out as he opens his bag and then quickly hurls the pregnancy test at your face before running away.

IT HITS YOUR FACE WITH A SMACK AND FALLS ON THE GROUND!! EVERYONE GASPS AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"YOU BITCH!!" You flip him off as he runs away.

"IM GONNA BE A DADDY!?" Shane and Rick shout in unison, both holding their head in their hands out of pure shock.

"AY! WUT!" Rick glares at Shane.

"NAW!" Shane glares back.

THEN THEY START DOING A PUNCHOUT AGAIN! SHANE KEEPS TRYING TO STRANGLE RICK WHILE RICK KEEPS TRYING TO SMACK HIS BUTT?! THEY FALL ON THE GROUND AND THEY ARE STILL GOING AT IT!!

"Dogfight!!!!!!!!!!!" Carol shouts.

THEN TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE DALE JUMPS ON TOP OF THEM, "Group hug.." He says as he creepily caresses them.

"WHAT!!!" They both scream as they suddenly stop fighting and hop up off the ground.

"what.. what happened.. huh.. where am I.." Dale whispers as he wanders back to his RV.

"uhhhh." Rick says.

Then you all stand there in silence.

"She's mah wife so it's mah baby." Rick breaks the ice.

"Um, I didn't pull out so it's MAH baby." Shane retorts. "

WHY YOU SUMOFA-!" Rick starts winding up another punch but then Andrea steps in!!

"guys stop this isn't you."

"ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." Rick ums.

You space out while all of this happens.. everything goes silent for you.. what were you gonna do.. and then your eyes flicker over to your left arm.. wait.. what was that.. You look.. and see.. a bite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"OHHH!" You suddenly exclaim in realization, causing everyone's head to snap your way.

"What!?" Everyone replies.

"GUYS! I'm not pregnant! I'm just bit!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

My dumbass was just informed that my request box was CLOSED, sorry everyone. It's open now.

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

_Masterlist_

\\ ''TWD'' //

''RICK GRIMES''

TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD (1/2)

TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD (2/2)

''SHANE WALSH'' TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD (1/2)

TWO'S COMPANY, THREE'S A CROWD (2/2)

''DARYL DIXON'' TBA..

''GLENN RHEE'' TBA..

''CARL GRIMES'' HOME ALONE (1/1)

''MICHONNE HAWTHORNE'' TBA..

''MAGGIE GREENE''

TBA..

''CAROL PELETIER''

TWO DRIFTERS (1/1) ''NEGAN SMITH'' TBA.. Go ahead and request anyone above!

\\ other characters tba // ================== \\ OTHER FANDOMS COMING AT ANOTHER TIME //

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

hey so if anyone cares pt2 is coming out in a hot minute I promise

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

WHY ARE YOU GUYS IN THE WALKING DEAD FANFIC COMMUNITY CRAZY!!!

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

TWO'S COMPANY THREE'S A CROWD

.- TWD, Rick Grimes x F!Reader x Shane Walsh -.

--------------------------------------------------

A/N: I think this will be at least two parts, but enjoy the first for now! This is written as a bit of an AU? lol, not sure how to exactly describe it. Reader is in Lori's place and it is set during mid or so season 2. I started TWD awhile ago and wanted to write for it. I've never really posted my works before, so hopefully this will be enjoyable for y'all. --------------------------------------------------

Above the sanctuary that was Hershel's farm, was the marmalade sky; perfectly painted with the color of the setting sun. Gentle clouds existed there, and the sight almost made you forget about the disquiet horrors that laid just outside the property line.

A tired sigh falls past your lips as your now callused fingers dig into the damp fabric of the shirt you sit and wash. A dark ragged cloth is clutched in your hand as you use it to scrub and scrub at the clashing red marred into the cerulean material.

Blood.

In the past, you'd only ever really see it when Carl got a bloody nose or whenever you managed to get a paper cut. Now it was anything but a rare sight. As your thoughts wander, your gaze pins into soapy scrubbed out shirt below, eyes burning into the stain. You knew it would never come out, and yet you still promptly dunked it into the cool water of the bucket below. Because you still had to try.

Try and hope. It felt like that's all you ever did anymore, two things that never ever guaranteed pay off. You swish the shirt around in the lukewarm water below, being faintly reminded of the washer you used to have; the haunt of the sweet domesticity you used to know ravaging your mind, possibly even sanity.

"..." You sigh out the built up inner tension, and switch your focus towards wringing out this shirt. Your hands diligently work to twist and curl the wet fabric, squeezing out the water it holds inside.

The only thing interrupting the motions you go through however is the distinct noise of crunching grass, one that usually alluded to nearby footsteps. Your head turns, preferring not to be ignorant to what the source was.. just in case. Although as soon as you spot the source in question, you curse the curiosity driven by your own paranoia.

It was Shane, his figure standing tall and imposing. Most of his impose being due to.. your history. His deceit about the death of your husband, what the both of you shared amidst his lie, the stinging sentiment you felt at the mere thought of him.

God, you really didn't want to talk to him right now.

Your grip on the shirt tightens as you swiftly turn your head back around, stand up, and then speed walk away towards the clothes line. hopefully he'd take the hint from your cold shoulder move. Alas, that hope of yours was severely underestimating just how stubborn Shane Walsh could be.

Within an instant you heard the simple crunches of grass become more urgent as Shane increased his charge towards you. He called out your name, his tone commanding and yet speckled with a sort of desperateness. He wanted you to hear him out.

"Hey hey- Let me tell you somethin'!"

No. You weren't going to do this, not today. He knew you were upset with him, why couldn't he just let you be? And so, without stopping you reach the clothes line and throw up the newly washed shirt, dead set on ignoring Shane.

It was regrettably, not as easy as that though, because as soon as you turned around you were face to face with the former officer. Instantly your face scrunched in annoyance as your mouth flew open to protest his presence, maybe even to berate him, but Shane spoke quicker.

"No no no- wait, just a minute. We need to talk."

"I don't have anything to say to you." You practically growled back as you hurriedly move to leave.

He steps directly in your way, hands reaching out and grasping your hips. "(Name)."

You hiss at him, "Don't touch me!"

This earns an exasperated sigh from him, "Ho-"

"WHUT!" You hear a shout from the distance, your heads turn instantly. It's Rick and he is MAD. "WHUT THE HULL!" Rick comes running full speed at you guys, and while Shane's distracted you take the opportunity to shake him off and step back.

"SHANE WAT ARE YOU DOIN' MANE!?" Rick says super mad as he speed walks over with his hands on his hips.

"NAWRICAHEASHABWALKOVERHERAAA!" Shane shouts back!!

You have no fucking clue what he's saying because his accent goes crazy!

"NAWWSHANEDONTYOUHAHABHAWSAYINGTHATANMMAYY!! YOU KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MAH WIFE!" Rick shouts back.

"YOU KNOW I'M THE BETTER MANE RICK!!" Then Shane and Rick get so mad they press their foreheads together and start shouting a bunch of southern insults.

"You're an egg-suckin' dawg, Shane lemme tell you what!!" Rick shouts.

"Oh nawh mane!" Shane yells back, "YOUR FACE REMINDS ME OF A RUN-DOWN HONKY TONK!!"

"AY AY AY!" Rick growls Rick throws his right hook at Shane, knocking the other on his ass. Then Shane lunges forward like a fury-filled Chihuahua and tackles Rick to the grass.

"YOU BETTER STOP!! STOP!!" You shout to no avail, watching in anger as the two bros duke it out on the ground.

You get so mad that you pick up a large rock and hurl it at Rick's butt, earning a loud "OW!!!!!!" It doesn't stop them though.

Luckily though, you aren't the only ones on the farm and soon enough Hershel comes running out onto the grounds. "OH NOAT ON MAH FARM!" Hershel says, storming over.

"Hershel you have to stop them!" You plead to the old man, wanting help with their outburst.

"STOP IT YOU TURDBURGULARS! YOU-" then Hershel says a REALLY REALLY bad word and it makes you gasp and cover your mouth in shock.

You look over at Rick and Shane and they are also really shocked, instantly they stop fighting and take ten steps away from eachother. Shane looks.. traumatized, but Rick looks pissed!

Apparently Maggie was there too because you see her storm up behind Hershel. "Dad!!! You can't say that!" She whisper shouts at him all mad.

"OH JUST WAIT UNTIL MAH TWITTER FOLLOWERS HEAR ABOUT THIS ONE!" Rick roars, clearly offended.

Then Maggie ushers Hershel off, leading him back into the house quickly. They BASICALLY run away to avoid Rick cancelling them. Distantly you hear Hershel shouting about how "Itsa mah farm!" and "I miss the old days!"

You're also pretty sure you heard him let out a large old man fart, and then you saw a lump form in the back of his pants.. But anyway! You hear loud aggressive breathing and you look back at Shane and Rick who are both now pissed again. You think Rick knows you cheated now.. you didn't want to deal with that.. so...

"Sorry guys Sophia wanted me to braid her hair today." You say before dinking away as fast as possible.

"But Sophia is gone.." Shane whispers quietly to himself.... as he stares at your butt disappearing into the distance..

As you dink away you sigh in relief, literally thanking god that you didn't have to deal with those bumfucks! Although.. you aren't relieved for long because suddenly just then your stomach starts hurting like a bitch!

"WHY DO YOU HATE ME!" You shout at your belly as you boom over next to Dale's RV.

You fall to the ground and clutch your stomach in pain. Oh no.. Diarrhea! You prep yourself for a shart or something but then you just end up puking so you're like oh ok. You hurl into the grass next to the trailer and it kind of gets all over the side of Dale's RV because you don't puke straight down EVER. After like a minute of straight hurling, you finally finish and then Dale jumps out of the RV.

You look up at him from the ground.. his jaw is dropped and his eyes are fully widened. "HOLY COW! I almost thought I was in the exorcist for a minute!" He exclaims.

"Um what..." You reply.. cringe...

"Are you okay?" Dale asks.

"Yes." You reply, not wanting to talk about it..

"Marriage problems..?" Dale asks again..

"How did you know?!" You reply, finally looking up at him in surprise.

Dale shrugs, "I don't know I just guessed."

"Um okay Dale.."

Then Dale comes up next to you and crouches, placing a sweaty hand on your shoulder. "So.. (Name).. It's very common for married couples to fight when the hankypanky gets boring.." He begins. "I am actually a twister champion just so you know.."

"No Dale."

"Aw.."

Dale looks down at the ground all sad. "At least tell Rick I like his armpits."

"NO DALE!"

"Aw.." Then Dale walks back into the trailer.

You shake your head! Bro was wilding after his crazy wife died! First the exorcist and now he's trying to form a threesom- wait.. the exorcist.. Your eyes trail up to the puke on the RV. You remember what the bathrooms always looked like while you were pregnant with Carl.. insanely puke ridden. OH NO! WAS SHANE EVEN PULLING OUT WHILE YOU WERE BUMP AND DUMPING?! (dumping turds and wasting all the toilet paper btw)

Immediately you jump upwards, you run all the way over to Daryl's hobo homeless core set up on the side of the farm. You see Daryl sitting on the ground next to a weird little stick built fire.. he was diddling with a dead rabbit.

"EW!" You gag at the sight. "UGH! DARYL!"

"WHut!" Daryl shouts back, angry as always.

"I NEED YOU TO GO ON A RUN!" You hiss.

"OH HELL NAW OLIVE OIL YO ASS TRIPINGN!" Daryl roars back, clearly not going to do what you ask. What a WHORE!

"URRGGH!! FUCK OFF!" You flip him off, run up to his fire, kick dirt in it to make it go out and then you run away to find Glenn.

"WHERE IS HE.. WHERE IS HE!!" You search the farm like a hawk as you look around for that sumabitch.

IT TAKES YOU LIKE 7 MINUTES BUT EVENUTALLY YOU SPOT HIM DOING SOMETHING YOU DONT CARE WHAT HE'S DOING WHATEVER!! You run up to him.

"Glenn! There you are!" You hiss at him. He looks so confused and concerned.

"Uh- wha- huh?"

"I NEED YOU TO GO ON A RUN FOR ME DAMMIT!"

He flinches slightly when you shout, clearly surprised at how you're directing your random fury onto him. ".. For what?"

You calm down a bit as you pause to explain the predicament at hand.. you take in a deep breath.. "Well it's a special stick that changes patterns when you go pee on it.."

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

Where is the toilet paper

[28gaugeshotgunshells]

I should shitpost on here