alien-ally

[alien-ally]

I’m just going to leave this here

[alien-ally]

[alien-ally]

I hate when a tiny stupid thing pushes you over the edge and makes you freak the fuck out because it makes you look like a completely irrational tar pit of a human being. Like no I promise this is warranted just maybe not about that specifically I swear I'm well adjusted. Come closer stick your fingers in my cage

[alien-ally]

to be seen without performing. to be heard without screaming. to be missed without disappearing. to be enough without proving it. to be held without falling apart. to be understood without explaining. to be wanted without conditions. to be. to be.

[alien-ally]

propaganda i am not falling for:

always moving on. some goodbyes need to rot a little. some griefs need to be held in the mouth like a stone.

beauty defined by algorithms. beauty exists in crow feet and smile lines

pretending to be chill. i’m not chill. i care deeply and inconveniently. i read into things. i write poems about eye contact

beige apartments with no soul. give me bookshelves and incense and loud art

sneaky links and unclear intentions. i want devotion. and also clarity

treating books as decor. read them. dog-ear them. argue with them in the margins

[alien-ally]

[alien-ally]

apologies to anyone who ever thought i was cool and reached out to me only to discover i am just a weird little hermit who can't carry on a conversation to save my life

[alien-ally]

You know what I'm gonna COMPLAIN!

Vanilla sex isn't "wholesome sex"! Sex is not more pure just because it's done within the framework of a monogamous relationship and free from elements of kink!

"Person is so pure they probably don't even know what sex is." Purity isn't defined by the distance from sex! As if the more a person encounters sex in any context the less pure their soul becomes!

You🫵are not immune to propagating the beliefs and ideas of purity culture!

[alien-ally]

[alien-ally]

Waking up next to the one you love? Overrated as hell. It's waking up next to your bear/favorite pillow that does it for me( ꈍᴗꈍ)

[alien-ally]

not being out to your parents means they can miss so much quintessential context about your decisions and the way you think.

[alien-ally]

It’s like I’m always chasing some romance. Obsolete romance. Looking for reprieve in dissonant spaces. Aching to be smothered in some sort of tension. Always turning away from my presently bleeding wounds to tend to past and future ones. Always treasuring the idea more than the real thing. Maybe that’s what’s doomed about me. The very emblem of all things I loathe, I am perpetually drawn to being. Hence. Everyone that finds me, will be left behind indiscriminately. Sometimes I end up thinking my kind of romance is where the lovers never unite. Heating up and going near motionless at the briefest slide of skin. More familiar with the memory of each other than the actual thing. In the silence of the night, miles apart, they think to themselves, that maybe a life spent yearning, tracing shapes only half visible is still a life worth living. Perhaps eyes having met only once, they are truly nothing more than ideas in each other’s heads. Phantom sensations. Like me. Maybe one of them dies. Or were never alive. Or belongs to another time. Romance. Love. Fuck all of it. I wish all lovers a well meaning ‘fuck you’. Oh well, your love already does that.

[alien-ally]

Not to go "if you have ADHD just go for a run" or anything, but I am so serious if you have ADHD you should regularly go outside, no headphones no phone no nothing and just stand and observe for a while until you've had enough. Not until you get bored, until you've had enough. Drink your coffee without watching tiktok. Have a bath without music. Turn down the volume in your headphones. I cannot overstate how much learning to be bored is cruicial with ADHD. Life is not just about pleasure, no matter what your dysregulated dopamine system thinks, and when you teach your brain to be okay with being bored, then boring tasks stop feeling like torture. By letting yourself be bored you are yoinking your system out of the high/low binary and allow for the highs to feel like actual highs and not just anything that isn't low. I am so serious go literally touch grass. Listen to the sounds in your flat. Stimulate your body the way it was designed. It lowers anxiety and makes you feel like you're real and best of all it's completely free

[alien-ally]

please will someone save me. haha im just kidding. please can i be saved

[alien-ally]

[alien-ally]

My life is so normal & Dope besides from the occasional falls from Grace

[alien-ally]

you've all gotta stop acting like "overweight" is a gentle PC alternative for the word fat and not itself an assertion of the ontological wrongness of being large. Over What Weight Precisely