amxliasxgarbxby - Tumblr blog

[amxliasxgarbxby]

[amxliasxgarbxby]

HELP ME THIS IS SO REAL

Please tell me I'm not the only one that sees this...

[amxliasxgarbxby]

Please tell me I'm not the only one that sees this...

[amxliasxgarbxby]

CON O' FUCKING NEILL EXPLAIN YOURSELF

[amxliasxgarbxby]

I HATE NBC HANNIBAL!!

However unpopular an opinion this may be, I had to come out and say it. NBC Hannibal is a plotless, senseless, brainless pile of trash. The plotline is boring at best and the dialogues are so strange and complicated that they are completely impossible to understand.

Also, the way the police force and FBI are depicted is completely inaccurate and quite frankly, offensive! How can they be so fucking oblivious to hannibal being the killer the entire time? Completely unrealistic if you ask me. All the signs were there! Hannibal the Cannibal?? Were these people blinded by Hannibal's overwhelming hotness or something? cause I can't find any other plausible explanation for how incompetent the entire force was in catching this homicidal homosexual.

Second of all, what the fuck is with the weird gay telepathy shit all throughout this show?? Take Will's therapy sessions, for example. Not a moment goes by without one of them finishing the other one's overly elaborate sentence that is usually a gay metaphor about the gay sex that they always seem to be a second away from having!!

And god forbid that Hannibal should even try to tear his gaze away from Will's fat ass!! I can't blame him either, with Will posing in front of him like a school girl in front of her crush while venting about his trauma... It's all so unnecessarily homoerotic!! If Hannibal did decide to stop cannibalising Will's ass with his eyes, the Intense eye-sex between them would never stop!! "Not fond of eye contact!!" "Eyes are distracting" MY ASS!!! you guys can't even draw the line at staring at each other and flirting in your gay metaphor language at crime scenes!! With poor Jack to witness it all!!

And another thing, what is it with the fucking cooking scenes?? Why do they have to make the fucking human body parts look so fucking delicious?? This is propaganda to turn us all into cannibals!! GAY cannibals!! I've never been more inclined to eat a human fucking calf in my fucking life! What is this sin of a television series...

Even without preparation, Will's ass was making me almost give in to those cannibalistic tendencies this sinful show inflicted on me!

On the same topic of glorifying cannibalism, let's mention the scene where Will brings Hannibal human meat GIFT WRAPPED and they stare at each other some more, hands grazing each other. What is this blatantly gay murderous shit?? Then they cook together. Well forget "cooking" you might as well call that COCKING cause they were ready to do just that all over the worktop, human meat in fact exposed. Not to mention that this happens not too long after Will fantasizes about straddling Hannibal and beating the shit out of him in one form or another. THESE MURDEROUS GAYS HAVE TO BE STOPPED.

And DON'T get me started on the scene at Mason Verger's where hannibal is NAKED in a CAGE wearing a COLLAR. again with the obscene encouragements. Do you WANT us to chain up hot old men? Be tied up ourselves? He had no business looking so good taking that shit off. This is devilish temptation. A sin above all others. Stop it.

Also? Why give the Wendigo Hannibal's face?? Do you WANT us to find that shit hot as well?? We know Will sure did, given that he thought about it during... A particular moment of pleasure....

The most offensive part of this all, however, is that I had to endure all of this constant eye-sex,, gay metaphors about caterpillars, hallucinatory wet dreams and various different penetrations of each other with weapons for them only to NOT KISS ON THE FINALE???

For that, I say, fuck you Bryan Fuller.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hate NBC Hannibal!!!

[amxliasxgarbxby]

AND ON THE SAME TOPIC HERE'S A FIC REC CAUSE I FOUND ONE ABOUT THIS EXACT TOPIC.

I love you guys for this y'all are insane 😭

AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS?!???

THE WAY THEY'RE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER WHAT 😭

IZZY HANDS WHERE IS YOUR HAND AT... 🤨

WHAT IS THE HAND PLACEMENT AND WHY.

[amxliasxgarbxby]

HELP I love this fandom so much it hasn't even been two days since the new episodes aired and there are already several Ao3 fics about the bar scene with Stede and Izzy.

[amxliasxgarbxby]

HELP Con do you ship this...? 🤨

[amxliasxgarbxby]

AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS?!???

THE WAY THEY'RE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER WHAT 😭

IZZY HANDS WHERE IS YOUR HAND AT... 🤨

WHAT IS THE HAND PLACEMENT AND WHY.

[amxliasxgarbxby]

⚠️minor ofmd spoilers⚠️

Izzy hands after Blackbeard cut off and force fed him his own toe:

Also Izzy Hands moments before the whole crew (including him) is supposed to be tortured:

Conclusion: Izzy Hands you absolute masochist.