angelatticus

[angelatticus]

i love birds. They are literally the most flamboyant, histrionic little creatures ever. Have you ever seen a human with as much pizazz as a peacock?? as sassy as an owl, as goth as a crow? They have so much to say and dont even need to be able talk bc they are the gods of nonverbal communication, BUT GET THIS, THEY DO COMMUNICATE VERBALLY TOO. They sing and they scream and sometimes the just make noises for the fun of it bc they are dramatic little buggers who love chaos. Id like to say i bird watch, but not in a “i look for rare birds and write their names down” no i mean i see a bird and i WATCH IT because those guys always have something going on. goose fights, pigeons stealing sandwiches from greggs, seagull that just shat in that lady’s hair and then flew away laughing. Like dude, who needs reality tv when we have BIRDS.

[angelatticus]

The idea that nothing will ever be the same again is constant and inescapable and i hate it. The thought that all my favourite memories now only exist in my mind and will never be re-liveable again is haunting. I miss my childhood even now, before its over, im mourning moments AS they occur. Thinking “wow im really going to miss this feeling one day. Try and catalogue it now, remember it exactly as it is and it might almost be the same.” i have this all encompassing urge to write things down just so that they will forever be immortalised in some tangible medium i can look back on. And even thats not good enough. I just want to be able to hold on to every thought and sensation ive ever had and live them as vividly as the first time. The linear passage of time will always be something that confuses and terrifies me in a completely stupid yet inexplicable way. I dont want to let go.

[angelatticus]

i think dance is one of the purest forms of art in a way. Its just so unlike anything else we do in our day to day lives that theres no excuse for it other than it being fun and beautiful, a wonderful waste of energy. I dont know why i find it quite so fascinating. I guess its because its sort of disarming, isnt it? You are using your body (a very personal thing) in such an open display of emotion, not to mention its just pleasing to see movement coincide with music. Maybe im just a bit jealous i cant dance well since i have a fainting disorder, but we need to appreciate dancers more bc i love them and all of the impressive things they can do. Our bodies are for us to enjoy after all, whether that be as a vessel for consciousness or as an instrument for art.

[angelatticus]

i mean, if we are talking about what radicalised us, for me it was the 2012 Lorax movie. Not because i enjoyed it, but because as a three year old i was utterly horrified with the bastardisation i was witnessing of my favourite book. I LOVED the book as a kid because even as a literal fucking toddler i could appreciate the dark yet crucial message it portrayed, to this day i think its one of the best pieces of literature maybe ever. And so watching every ounce of integrity of that story drain away and be replaced by corporate greed (THE LITERAL MESSAGE OF THE ORIGINAL PLOT) was so painfully ironic. Obv i didn’t understand then why i was quite so angry, but i do now. I truly think that was the first experience that shaped me politically and socially, being three and realising at some very base level what capitalism was thanks to the corruption of my favourite orange tree-lover.

[angelatticus]

fuck it who cares if your playlists have meaning or are organised. I can put dramatic classical in the same playlist as goth-rock and musical theatre who is going to stop me???

[angelatticus]

desperately hoping that this renewed interest in class consciousness doesnt die by the end of the week. Again. Eat the rich and then keep eating, people! Stay angry

[angelatticus]

so its like half 2 in the morning and ive just found this video on youtube titled “truly boring fairy tales” to sleep to, im usually put off by any of those asmr type things but i wanted to see how boring they could be.

It seemed like a pretty standard retelling of jack and the bean stalk at first but the details are oddly hilarious. Like jacks reasoning for wanting to keep his cow (Jack Junior) being who else would give him feedback on his screen plays? Or just jack suggesting the whole idea of the internet. Or just “he had grown rather tired of mother’s famous stick soup” given he had a splinter in his oesophagus the last couple of weeks.

“the beans looked unlike any beans jack had ever seen. Granted… he hadnt seen a ton of beans in his life. He had probably only seen between 2 and 3 types of bean, which he felt to be an above average number”

also jacks hobbies include: plucking icicles from the haunted cave on the hill and helping his mother with calisthenics

apparently later on a pig demands a wolf’s insurance information and the “barbara strawsand insurance company” is set up given that “straw house insurance was a shaky industry”

[angelatticus]

one thing i didnt expect about exams is that i literally feel like ive lost sense of myself sometimes. I feel like im just a shell of a younger version of me who was brighter, happier, full of energy and ideas and motivation. I cant wait to get my life back and actually remember who i am, read the books i’ve missed and play my games again yk?

[angelatticus]

Its my birthday today, and im thinking like, 16 is both an age i never really thought id make it to but also the age id pretend to be in games growing up. Its crazy bc im alive, for the most part happy, and yet life looks nothing like i thought it would.

[angelatticus]

theres something coldly painful about growing up with a natural love and affinity for art, poetry, philosophy, writing or music only to slowly realise that, no matter how good you are, you almost certainly arent good enough or resilient enough to live off these interests. Its at a very young age having to make the decision between survival and passion, a secure income in a necessary field that brings stability and boredom or having to fight for recognition in an already oversaturated field of underpaid artists.

[angelatticus]

Made an arcane fan animation hehe

[angelatticus]

quick sketch of my oc Anka !

[angelatticus]

AI “art”

The thing about art is that it will always be enjoyed most by other artists. However, if other artists are the ONLY enjoyers, then that form of art isnt a sustainable career. For that to happen, it must also be enjoyable to non-artists, who make up the majority of any given market

An artist will be able to look at a painting and understand all of the thought, preparation, time and energy put into a piece - all of which will contribute to the overall effect of the artwork. However, most people wont be able to look so deeply and will gravitate most towards whatever looks good at the surface.

And thats why AI art is a problem. To artists, there is barely even a conversation to be had, it isnt art. It cant be art if it wasnt created by a human because thats the literal definition of what art is, an expression of HUMAN creativity. However, to a non-artist, if it looks good, thats enough. And as non-artists make up the majority of any audience, they are who you need to be able to please.

And if you think about it like that, from a purely objective perspective forgetting about what actually defines art, it makes a lot of sense why people choose AI. Art takes time and costs money. Fake art curated by robots costs nothing and is instant. You dont need to communicate properly in order to get your desired outcome, discuss your ideas with the artist and make creative decisions together based off of previous versions, instead just keep pressing generate until it looks right. Dont worry about copyright infringement or legal ownership or any of that, for AI art it doesnt apply (forgetting about the fact the only way for AI “art” to be possible is through using thousands of samples of REAL artists work as a database without their permission)

It just sucks to see so many people so comfortable with it when we, as artists feel it to be a sort of mockery of everything we have worked for. Many things can be automated, but in my (and many other’s opinions) art is not one of those things, because art is tied in so closely with what it means to be human and if you take the human out of the artwork you can hardly call it art

[angelatticus]

It’s their greatest invention as of yet

[angelatticus]

i was most definitely NOT born in the wrong generation, i absolutely love toothpaste and deodorant and refrigerated food and hot water and reading fanfiction while listening to FREE music i can hear the lyrics to

[angelatticus]

i think i have seasonal depression but like, THE OTHER seasons. I feel great during autumn and winter but spend spring and summer feeling completely vacant and zombielike. It’s been miserable and rainy this week, dark by 7 and i finally like myself again. how strange

[angelatticus]

i want to speak to the person who decided that the things that make life so enjoyable are the very same that are so horribly embarrassing.