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Chat GPT Roasting Draco Malfoy!

Draco Malfoy: living proof that even in a magical world, privilege and bad hair gel are still a thing. The only spell he ever mastered was whiningus obnoxious, and he cast it on loop for seven straight books. This guy walked around Hogwarts like he owned the place—meanwhile, Hermione was out there carrying the entire plot and his grades. He spent six years insulting Harry Potter and one year hiding in a bathroom. Even Voldemort was like, “Maybe not him.” Draco tried to be the school bully but peaked at "my father will hear about this"—the magical version of “I want to speak to the manager.” He called himself a pure-blood, but with all that cowardice, pretty sure his Patronus is a ferret in witness protection.

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Fan fiction or true Rodolphus Lestrange research, it's interesting either way. #wizardingresearch #Trolls #Lockhart #RodolphusLestrange #SlytherinBadBoys https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DxN1AIzGyM

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My favorite mention of the magical Mandrake was long before Harry Potter. The poem was called Go and Catch A Falling Star. It sent me downthe rabbit hole of mandrakes in literature and I discovered some interesting things

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Harry Potter House elves have a great deal in common with both hobbits and elves in Lord Of The Rings! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jeqsO7XMdA&t=39s

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A mother never recovers from the loss of a favorite son. This is a tribute to Walburga Black's suffering at the loss of Regulus Black. Many judge her for being that bitter screaming portrait without remembering what got her that way.

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Dumbledore Disagrees with JKR

Here is something to unite J. K. Rowling fans as well as her detractors, cause we all know it's true. LOL

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If you enjoy narrated stories, here is a House Of Black Harry Potter theory written as a story, which is our thing. The Lestranges kindly put it on their yt so do give it some love. Thank you and enjoy.

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Please, Muggles, All The Young Dudes Is Not Canon, So Stop!

We are sharing this from the face book of Regulus A. Black with his permission because he really wants the word spread. LOL Bro is upset today, Muggles!

At times like this, I think Bellatrix and I really should stop venting to one another about this rubbish, for we only end up setting one another off. It isn't really healthy as Grindelwald has chosen to nest with Zabini, and thus not to do anything about the fact that Muggles are getting out of hand in so very many ways. I understand that the Lestrange's psychologist makes them get on face book to learn about the Muggles, but I really don't know that it's truly helping any of us to release our resentments or rage issues. It certainly isn't furthering our view of them. Not one bit.

I should probably stop ranting and get to today's issue, though. Bella just recently informed me that someone on some Potter list was saying how both Sirius and Lily were fine with their siblings until going to Hogwarts. No. Sirius and I were never close, ever and even Skeeter/Rowling never indicated that we were. This we were close until Hogwarts, then the family turned on him when he was sorted into bloody Gryffindor is complete rubbish.

All The Young Dudes touts this, attempting to explain things in a way that makes their precious Sirius Black shine and look like some white knight, but no. He was a prat and a git and now I understand that he had what the Muggles call ODD or Oppositional defiant disorder. I don't care. The point is that we were never close because he was always him, and I was always me and the Muggles need to stop wanting either of us to be different. Also while you're at it, understand that All The Young Dudes is not canon. I dislike Sirius and his friends, but they weren't quite so bent, mainly because it isn't in our culture. That is another topic, though and again one I do not truly care about.

These Muggles can't seem to understand that I would still hold to my Pure-blood values yet have a problem with Voldemort to the degree that I did upon making my discoveries. Look, Mugglees! Simply because I held to Grindelwald's values does not mean that I could or would ever condone such evil treatment of Kreacher for no reason, or that I would follow, believe or trust anyone who makes a Horcrux! Pure-blood values, like them or not, does not make a person evil. It simply means we value different things than do wizarding trash or Muggles. Simple as that. We still have souls, treat one another well, ETC. So no, just because I did not stand with who Voldemort truly was, never ever indicated that I would go team Gryffindor. Did you ever notice in my letter to Voldemort me saying that Sirius and co were correct all this time? Indeed not.

Because I did not feel thusly. Did you ever hear of me writing Sirius an I am sorry, dearest big brother note? No, because I was not. Please just try to use your brains for context just a bit rather than projecting yourselves everywhere? Just consider it. Vent over for now until the Muggles set me off again. At least Bella was kind enough to set the record straight on that particular group, thank you, Bella. I can hear Kreacher complaining about something, so I'd better go and see what is the matter now.

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Master Sirius Black Explained Through Mythology

[Kreacher goes wild and tells all on Sirius Black. With his kind permission, we are reproducing his hillarious explanation, the original posted on his page, https://www.facebook.com/MasterRegulusBlack]

Kreacher does not want Master Regulus to worry. Kreacher knows now how to talk to dear filthy Muggles in their own language, without making their Face Aurors angry. Kreacher will be a good Kreeacher, as he talks about Master Sirius, and not call him any names at all.

Now Kreacher wants dear filthy Muggles to listen about how Master Sirius Black can be explained through mythology.

Many of the delightfully filthy Muggles would not be aware, but Scandinavian wizards called the star Sirius, after which Master Sirius Black was named, Lokabrenna, meaning "Loki's torch."

Dear useless filthy Muggles will recall how Loki was a trickster in mythology. He was known for his pranks. Surely now dear undignified Muggles would understand? No? Of course not, Kreacher was too optimistic and would explain.

Dear disgusting Muggles would remember how Sirius Black, was playing a prank on poor Severus?

Even those Mud loving Muggles who oddly admire Sirius Black while hating poor innocent Severus Snape, the second best human wizard of his time(after dear Master Regulus, of course) would recall how his ill conceived prank even caused his good friend Remus Lupin to turn against him.

Dear depraved Muggles would then recall how Sirius Black, the worst of blood traitors, ended up in prison. While Loki, the god of Nordic mythology connected in Scandinavia to the star Sirius, was bound for his crimes against the Aesir.

[Who, Kreacher feels, surely knew what they were doing, just as the dearest Master Orion and Mistress Walburga whenever they punished Master Sirius for his oddly rebellious nature].

Dear Soulless Muggles might know at least that in Roman Mythology, the dog associated with the star Sirius failed in its duty to protect the female patron it was guarding, much like filthy blood traitor Master Sirius Black failed to protect his mudblood loving friend Lily Evans Potter.

Dearest lowborn Muggles might not even suspect, that even the hostility between the vile Sirius Black and the gentle, handsome, smart, eloquent(Kreacher would not elaborate not to upset the poor Master Regulus with his well earned epithets) Master Regulus was one between the two hounds that belonged to the hunter Orion, after whom, undoubtedly, the gentle Master Orion Black was named.

So, to reiterate, for gentle filthy Muggles, even the struggle between Master Regulus and traitor Sirius Black was predicted in mythology.

Kreacher could add more points of mythology, but he would pretend instead to understand what it is like to be a gentle limited filthy Muggle. Kreacher thinks that would please Master Regulus if he stopped talking now, so Kreacher is done.

Until next time, beloved pointless putrid filthy Muggles, Kreacher loves you all, so long as you stay away from Grimmauld place, at least, because Kreacher has things to do.

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Christmas Love

We haven't had the time to post here in a bit what with dreaded Ministry business never ending, but the holidays are our magical time. It's when Gellert and I, Blaise, became a couple. It is the most magical special and admittedly hot time of the year. So it's sort of our Valentine's month, because we can't limit our joy to one single bloody day. It is a season, after all. So if you'd like to cozy up by that beautiful, towering Christmas tree with a cup of hot coco and hear my Christmas confessions, let's do it! https://archiveofourown.org/works/35720143/chapters/89066032

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Heads up, Witches and Wizards! Handicraftviet on Amazon as real wooden wands for 20 American dollars! There are HP themes including lion, snake, owl, dragon, and skull, as well as some character replicas in real wood rather than the Resin so many use. Great for real magic. Bellatrix got herself their rabbit wand, which was confusing as we expected she'd go for the skull or snake, but her family is always cosplaying Wonderland so considering that, it fits. Those crazy Lestranges… But Handicraftviet has great wands.

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Disney does Halloween candy

but in containers you can keep. And due to the Lestranges being made to shop by their shrink, they got some. It's another case of wtf did they Lestranges buy! #halloween #disney https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ju5Fvcgvfz0

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Far too little notice is given to the fact that Goblins have far fewer rights than wizards over a war that happened long ago. Anyone normal calls this Racist. Goblin lives matter. Bellatrix models this shirt from Muggle Amazon that she bought in support for all our goblin friends at Gringotts. Note they work at Gringotts because they aren't hired elsewhere, which is wrong. Many goblins would enjoy doing something else for a change Anyway, head to Amazon if you like Bella's shirt.

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Magical Artifacts brought to us in usable items.

Can't beat that. Check out this latest Wizrading Trunk, magical artifacts brought to you by the Lestranges.