blindly-gazing

[blindly-gazing]

I'm a tool. It's what I was raised to be!

I'm the rusty old tractor in the shed

The one you say you'll work on

The one you forget about for a new one

I'm the used paintbrush you discarded

You replace me with a new full set

You forget about the art we made together

I'm the porcelain doll forgotten on a shelf

You grew up and moved out

Leaving me to crack and chip alone

You'll use me, and then you'll dump me in the trash. It's okay, I'm used to it. You'll do it eventually.

[blindly-gazing]

⛦ Trust doesn't exist with me. I may like you, but your intent will always be questioned.

⛦ I was raised by a narcissist. I can spot your manipulation. I know you're doing it. I'll know immediately.

⛦ But I'll let you. I'll pretend I don't see it. I don't want you to leave me, so I'll play your little games. Until you pull away or distance yourself, then I'm gone. You won't hurt me, it's fine. I'll survive, just like I always have.

[blindly-gazing]

Manipulated so hard as a kid I doubt everything

"I love you" Do you?

"I believe you" No you don't

"I won't leave" Are you sure?

"I can handle your flaws" How?

"I don't hate you" You will

"Are you okay?" I'll always lie

"You can talk to me" I never will