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i bet quackity and karl were so excited to be in this post <3

I think this is my most ambitious mood tracker so far (ft. Quackity and Karl)

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Entry 12

16 December 2021.

Days like these, healing feels impossible. It feels like everything I do is wrong and every choice I make sends me deeper into darkness. It’s suffocating. The other night I was convinced I wasn’t going to make it.

But dying is easy. Living is hard. And I like to choose the hard way out of pure spite. I’m going to get through this, and screw every single person and every single entity out there in the world that doesn’t believe that.

If I can do it, so can you.

[bluddyhanz]

Entry 11

15 December 2021.

I had a nice idea for a trilogy. I would talk about it but I’m not sober. Lol.

Have a good night’s sleep :) maybe I’ll tell you in the morning <3

[bluddyhanz]

Entry 10

14 December 2021. 11:32 P.M.

I am getting worse. But I’m still doing my best. Some things are just so hard to let go of. I’m a worrier, it’s what I do.

I hope everyone get’s a goodnight’s sleep <3

[bluddyhanz]

doodling some stuff for pen pals during zoom class.

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the sheer intimacy of getting a used book, seeing a stranger’s annotations on it, and feeling so utterly connected to someone you’ve never met >>>>>>>

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the only kind of mess I really like is an unfettered with pile of books. I don’t know why it is so satisfying to see all these mismatched shapes and shades of pages arbitrarily put together but it just is—a pleasing architecture of daydreams and stories to wander in

[bluddyhanz]

Lesbian pulp fiction cover art

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Entry 09

13 December 2021. 6:05 P.M.

So I just wrote a 10k word first chapter to a fanfic, and now I don’t know what to do with my life. I should be studying for finals, but I don’t know if I physically can.

Someone please send help.

XOXO Gossip Girl

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i was finding book titles with questions in them for reasons and putting them together it started to look like something

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sweaters, fuzzy socks, the feeling of getting into bed after a freezing day > summer

a vintage book store in Versailles is always a good option💘

_winter studying challenge | 4. dec. 2021☕

❄️ day 4: What is an unpopular opinion that you have about winter?❄️

I think that you like winter is already an unpopular opinion haha

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Entry 08

12 December 2021. 3:38 P.M.

I have this playlist called “chaos.” and I wish someone would appreciate it. It’s terribly all over the place and pretty much just a culmination of all extremely varying moods, but it feels like a part of me that deserves to be shared. Recognized.

It’s probably just because every song means a lot to me in some way or another, either as an integral part of my life or a smooth transition between spaces. 

My favorite part about it is that it’s made to be listened to without shuffling. You (I, I guess) pick a song at random and let it just play, and it never fails. It hasn’t failed me once (apart from moments where I feel insecure about my taste and skip songs I think people in the immediate vicinity won’t enjoy). Regardless, it’s a real peek inside my brain.

Somebody some day will like it, I think.

[bluddyhanz]

rory gilmore study inspo