bluntshavingrazor

[bluntshavingrazor]

17/06/2025

A retelling of Moby Dick mixed with Final Destination. They actually caught and killed the white whale (which was a vivid blue for some reason) early on, the it was a montage of how the various experiences, combined with physical injuries and an implied curse from Moby Dick himself, led to them all dying. Only two I recall are a sailor played by Evan Peters who ran from the hospital to escape the curse then got his scarf caught in the doors of a subway train, and Queequeg who set his dishcloths on fire, tried to put it out by shooting it with a gun, then hid in a cupboard until he suffocated.

Queequeg was also keeping Moby Dick's severed head in a water cooler somehow

[bluntshavingrazor]

The Ordinal numerals in English (first, second, third, etc.) have unique endings for the first three numbers assuming we're starting from 1.

1st

2nd

3rd

4th

5th

And so on. 1, 2 and 3 have their own endings, while 4 onwards only have '-th'. This is fine, we can't expect to have unique endings for all the numbers to infinity so it has to end somewhere (though I guess you could also have unique endings for the numbers up to 9 and then repeat).

The problem is that zero, 0, the big nothing, also uses the '-th' ending. The endings go 'th', 'st', 'nd', 'rd', 'th', 'th', 'th', and so on. I hereby propose that instead of 'zeroth' as the ordinal representing zero, we give it a unique (to numbers) ending and call it 0n't. Zeron't. The apostrophe can be dropped to make it easier.

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Oh, I shouldn't have opened this post on my phone. Now I have the 13th Doctor trying to help me, and she is canonically terrible at that.

[bluntshavingrazor]

15/06/2025

I decided to buy Oblivion: Remastered after all, only to find that they'd released a free Demo mode that had an incredibly cut-down version of the main quest. I downloaded that instead; after delivering Martin to Cloud Ruler Temple and infiltrating the Mythic Dawn, instead of going on various fetch quests to recover items for Martin's portal to Paradise you instead went into a single Oblivion gate and got the Staff of Mehrunesdagon (all one word for some reason), to give to High Chancellor Ocato. Ocato would then reveal, in a shocking twist, that he was the bad guy all along and you had to fight him, armed with the staff which allowed him to summon a tiny, man-sized version of Dagon into the world, along with an endless series of wild boar.

After defeating him, which was a very easy battle, Baurus would congratulate you and tell you that if you enjoyed this demo then you should buy the full game. You then had a series of dialogue options that would all lead to different ending cutscenes, but you could only pick one: attempting to reload a save to see the others had Baurus berate you for cheating. Then he suggested that there was an even more secret 'Lusty Argonian Maid' ending.

[bluntshavingrazor]

I'm really glad you love your girlfriend James but I think there are more concerning and frankly more important things happening right now

[bluntshavingrazor]

I still think the Wish World/The Reality War story is too messed up to be salvageable with any easy solution, but something that would, IMO, go a long way to fixing it without rewriting the whole episode? Belinda should have been Ruby, Ruby should have been Shirley and Shirley should have... well, also been Shirley but less so.

After Belinda has her screaming session, she goes out in search of the weird girl who turned up at their house that morning. Ruby brings her to the disabled camp, where she's been living ever since her mother kicked her out (and, yes, I'm also not too happy about Carla constantly being horrible in every alternate timeline but I'm trying to give the smallest change for the biggest improvement) and tries to get her to see that Conrad is a horrible person. Shirley is also there.

Then, since the scene where Belinda snitches on John is a different section of the episode and I'm trying to not rewrite the whole episode here, Wish-Belinda is not convinced by their insistence that Conrad is awful and Poppy isn't real, and instead leaves the camp angry. No, I don't think real world Belinda would have done that for a second, but Wish World-Belinda would have. Belinda in either reality was defined largely by just wanting to go home and being pulled into these adventures more or less against her will, so getting her to disrupt her comfortable life on the word of some insane sounding disabled heretics is a big ask.

This gives Belinda something to do in this episode, means the disabled resistance plot doesn't go absolutely nowhere, and still ties in to Belinda's character arc if you kind of squint and don't look too closely.

[bluntshavingrazor]

09/06/2025

Me and my friends were living in a field and building a variety of small shacks (using a video game UI, though I don't think we were playing the game so much as living in a world that used one) in order to try and rebuild society after a civilisation destroying event. Our struggles included chasing off thieves trying to steal our resources, digging up mines left in the ground after an unspecified war, and fighting off wild animals including farmyard animals who had gone feral.

We then got in our car and drove to the nearest city to buy supplies, because most of society had already recovered and we were just being very dramatic. We went into a large store and I asked about child-sized motorbike helmets for my daughter (I do not have a daughter either IRL or in the dream, this was a distraction so my friends could steal jewellery) and found out that the child-sized helmets were poorly made and very unsafe. I decided to make it my mission in life to expose this. No way I'm letting my doubly-fictional daughter ride with crappy safety gear.

Also, going back to the video game theme, you got extra points if you drove your car and ran over Sonic the Hedgehog on the road.

[bluntshavingrazor]

05/06/2025

One of my friends (same friend who bought our old school in another dream, actually) bought the hotel where my family would regularly go on holiday when I was a kid. He did it up to look nicer, including expanding the dining room to three times the size, but to fund all this he implemented a system where guests had to compete in a variety of challenges around the grounds in order to actually get food. It was divided into three zones; the desert zone, the swamp zone and the ice zone, and whichever guests travelled through all the zones, completing unspecified challenges and evading big thematically appropriate wyrms before returning to the dining room got to eat a hot meal. The rest got bran flakes.

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I wonder what hbomberguy, who complained in his Sherlock video about Moffat always setting up mysteries and not paying them off, thinks about Russell "set up 'the boss' in the 2023 specials, keep mentioning it but not develop it one bit for 2 seasons and now with the hiatus won't pay it off AT LEAST till 2026" T Davis now

[bluntshavingrazor]

In hindsight, there is something very funny about RTD making a big show about Conrad being so transphobic that he can't even acknowledge Rose Noble's existence in his utopian world and has to remove her from it entirely, and then have Rose do nothing of importance, have (IIRC) one line of dialogue, and then disappear when her tiny amount of relevance to the story is over.

Like so many things in that episode, there was no reason for her to actually be there in the first place. She does have a life outside UNIT, right? Or does she only exist to be a prop for Russel The Davies to pat himself on the back about how inclusive he's being? There are people far more qualified than me to discuss the various undertones of racism, sexism and transphobia present through the series, even before the RTD2 era. But if they're becoming this obvious to me, a white, cisgender male, then I think there's something wrong at the core of things.

[bluntshavingrazor]

I still don't get why it was Poppy from Space Babies. It only works if it was meant to be a clue that the Wish World was fake, because, hey look, John and Belinda's daughter is Captain Poppy from Space Babies. But in either interpretation of the ending (either Belinda had a daughter all along and reality has been set back to how it should have been in the first place, or the much more problematic option that the Doctor rewrote Belinda's history to make her a single mother), it makes no sense for Belinda's daughter to be Captain Poppy from Space Babies. Is she just a dead ringer for, and coincidentally has the same name as Captain Poppy from Space Babies? Does it somehow tie in to how Belinda looks exactly like a particular solider from the episode Boom?

At least with the Rani and Omega you had people who actually wanted the return of the Rani and Omega. Sure, they were probably disappointed but still. No one in the history of the world has given that much of a shit about Captain Poppy from Space Babies. This show started in 1963, over 60 years ago. It could run for another 60 years, and then another 60 after that, and no one will care about Captain fucking Poppy from the episode Space fucking Babies.

[bluntshavingrazor]

'The Boss' is going to turn out to be the fucking Valeyard or some shit, isn't it? Then they'll act nothing like they did in the Classic series and get defeated in the most ass-pull anticlimax imaginable.

You know what, Russ? Do it, and I'll forgive you everything.

[bluntshavingrazor]

Review of Doctor Who S2/15E08

I don't know why any of the things that happened in that episode happened.

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wish world being like "its bad to force women into being nothing but mothers" and then the finale of her own season literally shoves belinda in a closet with a baby during all the action like okayyy

[bluntshavingrazor]

28/05/2025

I was about to start watching a movie called Anaconda Ouroboros, about a giant anaconda that would attack people by biting its own tail and rolling into them at high velocity. This movie was unconnected to the real world Anaconda movies; it was actually a remake of the director's first movie, which was a 45 minute short film with the same premise.

The new movie was 2 and a half hours long, and was actually really good*. It wasn't even just good in a semi-ironic B-movie way like the original, it was just very well written and directed, and got rave reviews. The Anaconda Ouroboros even got a reasonable* explanation for its existence, it was actually a hoop-snake that had been captured and put on display by a cryptid hunter, so was attacking humans in self-defence.

/* by dream standards

[bluntshavingrazor]

SPOILERS for Doctor Who S2/15E07

K9: TimeQuake (2025)

[bluntshavingrazor]

23/05/2025

I was watching the Lord of the Rings movies and Sam had a car.