cait-loui

[cait-loui]

Nothing.

if it matters

october 2022 Thinking and more thinking. Is there a point to anything? The endless mental debates and the daily struggles. Yes there are so many answers to ”is there a point”. I mean, motivational speakers…religion… but like at the end of the day, avoiding conflict, putting so much effort in doing things, working, whats it all for? most of the time the outcome is miniscule compared to the…

[cait-loui]

Periscope.

It is exactly 2:59 am as I write this exact statement. I am wide awake yet I feel sleepy. Paradox. Yes I know. The one thing probably going through your mind right now is, why is she awake at this time. Like…what is she doing? …. or not. This was not by choice. Here I am trying to fall asleep, trying to quiet down the thoughts when suddenly , I hear the most faint sound. I open my eyes and try…

[cait-loui]

Ode To The Decade

Ode To The Decade

Hello,it is I

I would like to laugh because the happiness did stop.

What a year it’s been right?! This post has nothing to do with poetry, I just felt like it sounded cool to name it that. Well, let’s get right into it.

The year is coming to an end, the decade is basically over, we have lived lives and hopefully will continue to. I know what to write but also I don’t and I feel so…

[cait-loui]

Happy.

Hi hello hi 🙂

It’s me again.

Time has really moved hasn’t it? As the title suggests, there’s happiness. More specifically from me. I’m currently really happy. It’s just overflowing through me and around me.

This summer has been so very much interesting and I actually for once appreciate every single thing that has happened. There’s been ups and downs but more ups than downs. But all the…

[cait-loui]

Tornado

what’s going on?

Do you see it all happening?

It’s right there. Open your third eye and you’ll see.

It’s in the middle.

This is such a moment of whirlwind UPturnment. Do you get what I mean? No of course not, what was I thinking? What I was thinking. ( you read that wrong)

Its night time time time. I should be asleep. It might as well not be nighttime as you read this but it’s…

[cait-loui]

🌼It’s the first of February!

0w0

I’m so super excited at that fact but also I’m SUPER FREAKING OUT. (help)

I’m currently in my classroom and it’s morning. 7:09am. The sun is in front of my eyes and the sky is clear and light blue with a few clouds.I wish I could take a picture.

kinda like this but lighter

Anyway, these words will have to do. These words will preserve the me in this present state at this current moment that will dissipate in the future and that calms me. I feel good that I  have this. This ‘blog’. I feel like since I can put words here, the memories can last forever and  I can re-live each moment as I read the words. (unless of course the internet crashes and breaks..then all this is gone forever.) Now I’m beginning to feel anxious because I just thought about how unreliable the internet is and how anything can happen at any time and all this can be lost in the fraction of a second. aaaaaaaaaaaaah now I feel like I wish I could re-type my posts and keep them in a flash disk in case the internet crashes (which is highly unlikely)…welcome to my mind 🙂.

*heart rate increases*

*hands shaking*

okay it’s hard to type in this state.

*deep breath*

okay. Back to what I actually wanted to type.

Soooooo. I’m super excited because I like February so much. I really have no idea why but it just makes me feel a way. A nice way. I feel like February is Blue. Do you get what I mean? It feels like it’s :

okay so my font colour has changed and I don’t know how to change it back. GREAT! Oh okay yay, I’ve managed to change it back.

gghlirwhi . I keep veering off topic and time is running out.

I am super freaking out because it’s almost my birthday. I do not know why I’m so anxious about that. Is it normal? I don’t know. (help) I’ve actually been so aNxiOuS about it since the year begun. ( Happy New Year by the way). I just feel like as soon as I turn       18👎 then It’s over. what I mean is that. I have to be an actual person in the  world and do person things. SIGH. I wish I could pause time until I could be ready and comfortable to do things and be ways. BuT tHaTs Not hOw ThE wOrLd wOrkS😐. I just constantly want to unexist. Don’tget me wrong though. I love my life and the people in it. I would just rather not have existed in the first place. I think I’ve explained this in previous blog posts. oh btw, WhEN I tYpE LikE tHiS iN My HeAd I fEeL LikE :

Anywayyyyyyyyy I think I’m more calm now.

I diverged from typing for a few minutes. (trying to find nice pictures to put in here)

I am supposed to be reading Biology because I have exams coming up but I feel good typing here so I shall sacrifice TImE and release all these thoughts then I can go along with my day. hmmm it has come to the point where I have nothing else to say BUT I’m so sure that after I post this, the thoughts will come rushing through and I’ll be like, “I ShOulD hAvE AdDed ThIs ahhhhhhh . It’s too late now because they wont read the edited version if I add things ughghhghg”

Oh well. Life is Life and sometimes all we can do is nothing. To just let things happen and take their own course and we are the ones responsible for our own happiness.

Have a lovely day!

                                                                             and 

                                                       Enjoy where you are now 😊🌼.

                                                                               L

    February🌼 🌼It's the first of February! 0w0 I'm so super excited at that fact but also I'm SUPER FREAKING OUT.

[cait-loui]

Twenty Of Eighteen

Hi again and hello.

Today is a day. A daily day. I wanted to wait and write this on the very last day of the year as a kind of symbol? I don’t know. It just seems cool to post on the last day of the year so that’s why I’m doing it.

What a year it’s been right? like wow. It was hard and like yucky. And I’m sure plenty of people would agree.

Not all of it was bad though. I’m sure we all had at…

[cait-loui]

Please read my blog thanks👀🌼

also leave a like or comment

it helps

[cait-loui]

Please read my blog thanks👀🌼

also leave a like or comment

it helps

[cait-loui]

People.

I realised that I barely say hi in my posts so hi🙂.

I hope you’re doing alright at the moment cause I know sometimes life can really be a lot to handle. something along the lines of :

Anyway, let me begin.

There are so many things I can write about people but for now, I’ll focus on what ‘inspired’ me to do this.

So…well…as per ‘normal’ human behaviour these days, I was scrolling through a bunch…

[cait-loui]

EVeRYThiNG

EVeRYThiNg is sOmeTHinG.

(Before you begin reading, click here to listen to the playlist id like you to listen to as you read …Enjoy 🙂

I am Nothing. I am Everything. Everything is nothing. Nobody is anything. Not even you. You don’t exist.Nothing that exists exists. We’re all imaginary. We’re dreams in the mind of the dreamer. The dreamer doesn’t exist either. One day he’ll wake up and none of us…

[cait-loui]

There are things other people have said that you remember but they don’t, and there are many things you have said and done that other people remember but you don’t.

[cait-loui]

“Understand that you own nothing. Everything that surrounds you is temporary, only the love in your heart will last forever.” ~ Leon Brown

[cait-loui]

Something I can't Explain

Something I can’t Explain

Today I felt everything.

My mum was leaving for a trip this morning so I wanted to say goodbye to her before she left. I was just about to finish watching an anime movie called a silent voice. If you click on it right there you can be able to check it out if you want.

Anyway, I opened the gate for her and sooner rather than later she was gone. I hadn’t been outside in a long time. like really…

[cait-loui]

RAIN

I really like rain. And it’s been raining quite a lot for the past few days. I like the smell in the air after it rains or just before its about to rain, which is actually…in more sciency terms called “Petrichor”. Actually …weirdly enough it started raining after I started typing the second sentence. I also like to listen to music as I type. It puts me in this alternate realm of time that I can’t…

[cait-loui]

randomness

this isnt really a post but an informative information

due to school and life i shall be postin bi-weekly

dont miss me too much 🙂

i like you all alot

[cait-loui]

SADNESS

WARNING : Deep stuff down below. Don’t drown. 🙂

Why are we sad? According to WHO Geneva, 4 October— One in four people in the world will be affected by mental or neurological disorders at some point in their lives. Where does sadness come from? Our brains physically make us sad sometimes due to lack of enough dopamine and sometimes it just comes from somewhere inside us that we can’t explain. It’s…