cloudy-li - Tumblr blog

[cloudy-li]

would YOU, my lovely humans, mind doing a lil questionnaire for my senior thesis?

Hello my loves!

if you dont mind, would you please be able to fill out my questionaire for my Society And Culture Major research Project on parasocial relationships in K-pop and Western pop? (^^)

simply pick the genre you listen to the most!

K-pop, Western pop

Thank you so much! and if you are able to, please don't hesitate to share with others!

[cloudy-li]

chapter five - a lesson on the art of misdirection

pairing - luke castellan x unclaimed afab!reader warnings - canon typical masterlist + tag list req - found here note - 1.5k enjoy my wonderful people :] i'll try to upload as regularly as possible but no promises! taglist! - @rinisfruity14

Your tattered black baseball cap was discarded on a rock, jutting out from the forest floor, covered in a thick blanket of maple leaves and frost. Shrouded in the shadows of naked maple branches and towering conifers, you and Luke sparred. Clashing steel to bronze. Meeting, matching ducking, counter-attacking, and defending were ingrained into your muscles since you were taught self-defence as a child, constantly on the move, hopping from one plane to another.

Luke parried, he side stepped your swipe at his side as you twirled around to counter his stance, blocking his attack. The dagger attached to your hip pressed into your thigh. You panted as the two of you danced like two eagles in the air. Talons locked, the two of you spiralled into a flurry of swipes and phantom slashes and parries. Luke charged forward both hands on the polished leather-bound hilt; you readied the grip on your own hilt, worn with use, the polish long smudged off. You stood your ground, planting your feet firm on soggy leaves as you readied your sword. The sword came in heavy and a resounding clang echoed around the sheltered clearing as steel met bronze. Luke slashed at your torso taking a step forward. You took another back, parrying the blade. The two of you met steel and bronze again until the edge of your blade met the cross guard of his. Sliding down in an ear splitting screech, twirling the tip to dislodge the sword from his grip, sending it flying in the air, landing with a brittle clang as it hit an outcropping of rock. 

Wheezing, you came face-to-face with Luke, turning around the hilt of the sword to rest the blade against his collarbone. “Hah… I win…!” you exclaimed, chest heaving. Luke studied you briefly, his eyes which should have held sparks of mirth, were steely. “Good job,” he held up his hands. “But you forgot one thing.”

Luke took a minuet step back, kicked the pommel of the sword from your grip, knocked you off your feet, nicked the dagger at you hip and placed it against the column of your throat all in one fluid move. Taking shallow breaths, as he straddled your abdomen. One hand on your shoulder pinning you down while the other held the dagger languidly against your throat. 

‘Stupid Hermes kids and their quick hands’ you couldn’t help but think. 

“The art of misdirection,” Luke began with a huff. “Never let down your guard and always, always, account for everything.” His expression was stern as he got up, extending a hand to help you up. Luke paused. You got up, grasping your hand in his and went to collect the stray swords from the floor, before handing Luke his and sheathing you blades in their respective sheathes. Luke grabbed your arm as you started to sheathe your sword. There was a look of urgency in his eyes, “You need to always be prepared, starlight, if you don’t pay attention to every tiny detail, no matter how insignificant it may seem, you will be misdirected, misused… Maybe even manipulated by what you choose not to see.” 

Noon had long passed and dusk was beginning to set on Long Island Sound. You and Luke had showered after your sparring match and attended to your daily duties before meeting back up again alongside the banks of Zephyros creek. Hand in hand, the two of you ventured ever deeper into the shadow scattered undergrowth, following a familiar, well-worn path towards Zeus's fist. Your mind was swirling with Luke’s words. ‘Never let down your guard, always account for everything.’ Your eyes were drawn to the creased ferns and tattered leaves that marked the path you tread on. Again, you thought of your dream. Or was it Luke’s dream to which you were an unwelcome voyeur? Your head spun. 

You took a step closer to Luke, shoulder touching shoulder. Luke let go of your hand and wound an arm around your hip, absentmindedly. Toying and the belt loop of your well-worn jeans. ‘Should I ask?’ Your thoughts ran unchecked, unleashed. “Luke,” an impending sunset backlit his curls golden. “Hmm? What is it, Starlight?” Gently, he came to a stop and turned you around to face him. Softly, he cradled his elbow, his other hand resting on your hip. The nail of your index finger dug into the flesh of your thumb. 

“I saw you, I-I mean, I saw your dream…” Luke started to chuckle. 

“What…” The hand on you hip retracted, slightly, and Luke took a step back. His pupils were frantic, scanning your face intensely. 

“How, what did you see…” there was a certain degree of cautiousness in his voice, like a bait thrown into the ocean to see what you knew.

You clenched and unclenched your fists, eyes darting around the darkened foliage that glowed in the early sunset. 

“Uh… You, Your mother? A house and uh… a beach… yeah” Your fingers grasped the pale strand in your hand. “Please don’t be mad…” You whispered.

Luke carded a hand through his curls, more than anything he seemed shocked, the gears in his head turning at double the speed. “I, uh… I don’t even know how I see these things,” Your fingers played with your hair, “Sometimes, if I’m thinking about someone, I just slip…”

There was a breeze that blew in from the north, carrying salt in the air and there was a rustling in the undergrowth, a few feet from the beaten path. Luke took a step towards you. His eyes were swimming, swimming with something you didn't understand on another’s face. Then, he grabbed your shoulders and a smile broke out on his face. 

“You said you wanted to help me, right? Help me overthrow the gods?” “Yes, and I still do.”

“Good… We can use this, your power, starlight, to recruit, to build an army.”

You also broke out into a small smile. “You think we can?”

Luke nodded, grabbing your cheeks and placing a chaste kiss on your lips that left you giggling. 

Luke’s eyes perked up, locking over your right shoulder, examining the long shadows that turned the foliage and undergrowth black.

And that's when it appeared. The lithe red body of a lion emerged from the undergrowth, teeth bared, tail raised. It screeched a deafening song which rung your ears. You could see Luke’s posture crumple, his hands flying to his ears. And then, just like that, without even a moment to breathe. Its tail was raised and pale yellow barbs were flung towards the two of you. A clear sheen of venom covered the projectile as it hurtled, hurtled ever closer.

You grabbed at Luke’s hands as the barbs neared, the hair on your neck stood up. ‘We’re going to die, we’re not gonna make it’ You held Luke’s hand and wrapped your arms around him, hugging him, chest to chest. You could hear his heart. ‘Is this the last time I’ll hear it?” 

You waited for what felt like a minute, but the blow never arrived, neither did the pain or the screams. A guttural screech echoed through the forest. You could feel your ears tingle at the sound and the beat of Luke’s heart under your skin accompanied by the frenzied shaking of your shoulders. Dazed, you dared to look at Luke who’s eyes were focused elsewhere. ‘Hes okay, still breathing, still alive’ Hesitantly, you turned around, your grip on Luke’s wrist faltering when you saw it. 

A column of shimmering black rose above your heads and arched around you bodies creating a spherical dome between the two of you and the monster you recalled mortifyingly to be a manticore. Smoky tendrils danced within and all around you, opalescent enough to see the last fading rays of sunset on the horizon. You turned to Luke, who’s eyes were wide as yours, mouth slightly agape. 

“How did this…” “You…” “Me…?”  “You… Starlight…” “Me…”

You bought your hands close to your chest, letting go of Lukes. You turned them over, palms facing up. They were calloused from training but otherwise, plainly normal, unpromising. Luke’s and your instincts were turned back on as the manticore shrieked again, its thin, shrill voice sending quivers down your spine. Luke was the one who reacted first, as your eyes were again, drawn to the shimmering black in front of you. Within the blink of an eye,  Luke was pulling you along the path, jumping over, cutting corners and sprinting straight back to the banks of the river and down east towards the cabins. Smacking aside brush and branch. And even at a time like this, you couldn’t help but admire him, admire the determined focus in his eyes. 

FInally, when you broke through the forest and into a clearing a few metres away from the armoury, you and Luke collapsed on the floor, panting for breath, adorned in stray cuts and jagged scratches from some thorny underbrush. Still in a trance, you got up, checked over Luke and stared disbelievingly at your hands. Luke got up with a grunt, sitting cross-legged from where he was laying on the ground. 

“Starlight,” he inhaled deeply. “Starlight, who are you?” his brows were furrowed with worry as he placed a hand on your knee, still as mystified as you were. 

You stared scrutinizingly at your palms, trying to make sense of the curves and staggers.

“I… I don’t even know anymore…”

[cloudy-li]

chapter four - childhood's end

pairing - luke castellan x unclaimed afab!reader warnings - a little depressing, deals with my interpritation of luke's mum, angst :( fan cast of younger! luke idk his name but creds! masterlist - found here note - sorry, senior year started and its a pain in my ass :( will try to upload as regularly as possible! :D (also unrevised)

A mid-autumn sprinkling of frost adorned the undergrowth of camp half blood, covering the ground in a shimmering veil of crystal-cut diamonds glimmering softly in the first rays of breaking dawn. The early morning had been peaceful.

Until, again, you slipped. 

You had been dozing off peacefully, lulled to sleep by the faint smell of charcoal and the melodic notes from panpipes of satyrs that wake with the first light. As per usual, throughout the night you had been restless; tossing and turning and wiggling and squirming because not a single spot on your bunk seemed comfortable enough. And your tired sleep-deprived body had given in, the second the sun – driven by Apollo’s chariot – cracked over the horizon. You had shut your eyes and expected comforting darkness, but the situation that you found yourself in, left a bitter taste on your tongue. 

You stood in a dilapidated house. The wallpaper was peeling off in stripes and the sharp stench of mould struck you all at once. You looked around, observing the setting. You stood in what appears to be the living room with a bright red couch, it’s foam showing through multiple tares on the surface, moth bitten and falling apart. A few toys were strewn across the floor – a wooden elephant, a toy car and two miniatures of plastic snakes. A mantel sat opposite towards it above an old school box television set, projecting static into the room. You walked closer to the pictures, its frames dented and chipped. There were perhaps only two – or three and within each one of them was a brown-eyed boy with dark curls. Even Though he was significantly younger, you still recognised his face. You took a step back.

Glass broke and hysterical cries echoed throughout the house. Your heart skipped a beat. 

“LUKE! LUKE! WHERE ARE YOU! LUKE!”

The voice was frail and it cracked briefly multiple times throughout it’s demands. ‘Where am I?’ Almost instantly, after the screams, you heard a thump and the padding of two small feet on wooden floorboards, a voice crying, “coming mother!” and a mop of brown curls whizzing past you. Curious, you fell into step and followed after him. Watching a young pyjama-clad Luke rushing to his mother’s side, embracing her briefly and dashing to the bathroom, climbing a stool to fish out a cylinder teal and white capsules. Returning to the hysteric cries from his mother’s bed. He gave her the pill and an offering of chlorinated tap water to wash it all down. 

The curly haired boy stayed with his mother until the crying had subsided and she had nodded off to sleep before getting up, moving to the moth-bitten couch. He brought his knees to his chest, hugged himself and began to cry. 

It fractured your heart. You took one step towards the small child, intending to wrap him up in your arms. But, you couldn’t move anymore. You tried to take another step, but hit face-first into a wall of nothingness. Desperately, you paced around the room, prying, probing, but nothing would let you through. You were stuck. ‘I can’t move from where my roots are.’ You paused your kicking and prying and clawing at the barrier, and instead remained still, closing your eyes. 

You will yourself to imagine, to pick up pieces from your own memories and turn them substantial. Weaving spools of vividly kaleidoscopic memories into a sprawling tapestry of amber sands and turquoise waters. The uncanny scent of cinnamon danced across the sea shore, carried by the winds towards the ocean. You let your body reminisce the senses, lulled into languidness by the familiarly foreign scents of your childhood home. The young boy, Luke, looks around him as well. 

He looks at the sky and marvels at the sand, ‘His tears are gone,’ you exhaled, letting your body relax in nostalgia. 

A bright smile shone on young Luke’s face as he darted about the stretch of beach. Running from the lush coastal plains to the surf. There was a spark in his eyes. Though, in all honesty, you couldn’t place what it was. But the corners of his eyes were creased and his smile was bright and that was all that mattered to you. 

You let yourself smile as he ran to a wave. Running, jumping and skipping, fading. Fading. No, why was he fading? Why? Why was the entire scene fading? The crashing of the waves gave way to the chirping of cicadas and raindrops falling on rooftops of metal and marble and ceramic all alike.  

You woke up. Gasping for breath, ‘Luke.’

It must have been five, or six in the morning, but the sky was still streaked with hues of blue and purple and pink. As not to awaken those who were  not already up, you gingerly placed your bare feet one step at a time. From haphazardly woven linen Rugs rugs to the cold of lacquered oak floorboards, you mapped out a route to the cabin head’s bedroom.  

When you arrived,  look at already gotten dressed, And was sheathing his celestial bronze sword. You softly knocked at the doorway. “Luke..?” you ventured out. “Oh, y/n!” The stern, seriousness of Luke’s face was replaced by a softer look; eyes crinkling slightly and the edges of his smile turning upwards as he approached you. Opening his arms. 

You gave in, looping your arms around his chest, tucking your nose to the crook of his neck, you breathed in notes of pine and ozone and another scent you couldn’t quite place, but was definitely his. Luke kissed the top of your head. “Hey starlight,” he leaned back, smoothing down your frazzled hair 

“I’m gonna go out and train for a bit, wanna join?” 

“Sure,” you replied, then, you glanced at your pyjamas, sheepishly. “Just let me put something else on.” Slipping away tentatively from Luke’s embrace, you went to quickly get changed out of your nightclothes.

[cloudy-li]

chapter three - together, we'll change the world

pairing - luke castellan x unclaimed afab!reader warnings - chunky dialouge :( a pinch of angst masterlist - found here

A full moon heralded in the beginning of winter. The days were getting shorter and the nights were getting longer as campers who went home for the winter break began to filter out, drifting away like how autumn leaves fall from trees – only to return in the spring. As the atmosphere had started to cool, your friendship with Luke had started to warm.

Now, the two of you would often accompany each other to the lake. Which was where you were right now. Luke gingerly put one foot on the surface of the lake; he nudged the half-frozen surface continuously, testing the waters. Then, he put his other foot on the ice waiting a grand total of one second before turning to you with a victorious smile on his face. 

“See, I told you by now it would have froz–ACK!” Luke jumped into the air as the ice underneath him cracked and unceremoniously soaked his entire foot with shocking cold water. You snorted, trying to contain your laughter behind your hand, stomach-aching - eye crinkling laughter poured out of you as Luke dejectedly ran to you on the embankment. “Looks like ice skating will have to wait a few weeks for everyone,” you managed to wheeze out. Luke pouted as he began pulling off his drenched shoes and socks. “Hey! It looked pretty solid, okay?” You giggled as you got up and fell into step with him. “Alright, whatever you say~” Luke broke into a grin.

The camp was emptier than normal and the kids that were still here – all rounders like you and Luke – had all gathered in the Hephaestus cabin for dragon-toasted s'mores. Luke slumped near the hearth of the Hermes cabin as you fussed about grabbing logs, matches and some tinder to get a fire going. Afterwards, you plopped down next to Luke, taking off the cardigan from around your shoulders and folding it on your lap. “Did you hear it again?” Luke nods and something flashes in his eyes. Indecipherable to all but a select few. It's the same look he gets while sparring or leading or standing up for new campers against the occasional Ares kid. Some may decipher it as focus, vigilance. But you know that look intimately well. 

It is the look of determined rage. Violence. Stirring beneath his warm brown eyes.

“Is it the same dream? On the winter solstice?” again, Luke nodded. 

You held your cardigan to your chest. 

“Are you gonna do it?”

“Yeah”

“Then let me help”

“No, it's too risky” 

“Luke, you’re doing this because of your father, right?”

“Yeah but–”

You cut him off. “Then let me do this because of my mother. I want to spite her – whoever she is, I want to see her fall from her grace on Olympus.” You picked at the skin on your fingertips, eyes staring straight into the cracking hearth. “I want to see the gods burn, indiscriminately. They’ve done nothing but treat us like trash, humiliate us,” Luke touched the scar on his face. “It's only right we do the same, their time has come – and gone. They’ve had centuries, aeons, to learn from their  mistakes but they never will. To them, we’ll always be an afterthought.” You clenched and unclenched your fist leaning closer to Luke for some semblance of comfort. “I mean, my mother had seventeen years to claim me,” Luke’s hand drifted to yours, interlinking pinkies – a promise left unsaid. “And yet, she couldn’t be bothered.” There was silence afterwards, broken only by the crackling fire and the faint laughter emanating from the Hephaestus cabin.

“Okay, starlight,” Luke whispered. 

You smiled at the nickname, albeit sadly. “Thank You,” you gently squeezed your interlocked pinkies. Your eyes landed on his face. “We’ll get through this together. And we’ll change the world , for the better. For everyone.” 

A thin, sad smile adorned Luke’s face. 

[cloudy-li]

chapter two - the circumstances of our meeting

pairing - luke castellan x reader warnings - mmh nothing much just fluff :) masterlist - found here

Inside the dark – albeit musty – rooms of cabin eleven, your hands started to shake. Violent tremors ran up and down from the base of your wrist, to the tips of your fingers.

That is of course, If your fingertips were there. You clenched and unclenched your left fist once. Of course, the only thing that was visible was a ghostly dark shimmer where your fingertips should be. You clenched and unclenched your fist, willing the shimmer to turn opaque – to turn tangible again. 

Nonetheless the dark shimmer persisted, stubbornly. There was a dark rot creeping downwards from your fingertips, threatening your knuckles. You clenched and unclenched your fist. Repeating the action over and over to the frantic beat of your heart, heavily inhaling and exhaling to the rhythm. A stray tear fell into the corner of your lips. Then another and another until the dam was broken and the water was unstoppable. Stubbornly, they sprang from your tear ducts and raced to jump from the edge of your face. You were thankful for the empty cabin. 

“Hey, uh… Are you okay…?”

Smooth and warm like honeyed nectar, Luke Castellan’s voice made you freeze. If there was one thing you hated more than unnecessary brightness, it was confrontation – specifically, talking about your emotions. You jumped up, grabbed your sunglasses, grabbed your cap and almost bolted through the cabin door, before, in the blink of an eye, Luke had grabbed the scruff of your camp shirt and twirled you around to hold you by the shoulders. “Woah, easy there, it's just me” You struggled against his grip. Right hand making a feeble attempt at prying him away. “Luke, please just let me go…” Your voice cracked. You hadn’t meant for it to scratch but it had and now the tears you had momentarily forgotten stung your eyes afresh with renewed vigour. 

Thankfully, your sunglasses covered it.

Luke squeezed your shoulders gently. “Y/N, it's my duty as the Hermes head counsellor to make sure that everyone under my care is safe and happy. And right now I think I would be right to assume that you are neither one of those things.” Luke’s eyebrows furrowed as he subconsciously started to trace random patterns with his thumbs. ‘Always fidgeting’ you observed through your tears. 

Luke’s eyes darted downwards as you clenched and unclenched your fists again. Before you could snatch it away and hide it behind your back, Luke, with gentle force gilded it back. 

“Your fingers…” he exhaled. “What…”

“I don’t know either,”

You were looking away from him, away from his eyes. “It's been like this since I was four or five, it's worse on some days more than others. I, umm…” you stammered to a halt when you realised Luke was staring at you. Straight through your sunglasses and into your eyes. There, you swear you could’ve seen that spark again. That spark of danger. Exhilaratingly addictive danger. 

Ever so gently, Luke reached up, took your sunglasses off, putting them on a random bunk and gingerly brushed the dried tear stains on your cheek with the pad of his thumb. He cradled your cheek. Your heart and stomach decided to partake in a gymnastics routine as Luke pulled you in close. Warmly, comfortingly, he hugged you. And you couldn’t help but gingerly loop your arms around his sides and basked in notes of pine and smoke and ozone.

Luke pulled back, a smile on his face. It was small, genuine. “From now on, I want you to know that you are not alone. I’m sorry I didn’t recognise it at first, but whenever something, anything happens, my door is always open.”  He cradled your hands in his and smoothed his thumbs over your palms, your fingertips had returned again, the black shimmer almost gone. “So if something like this happens again, come to me, okay? And we can figure it out together.” The trembling in your hands had subsided with Luke’s touch. You offered him a grateful smile. “Okay, I will.”

A heartbeat of silence passed before you added: “Thank You.”

[cloudy-li]

chapter one - through your masqurade

pairing: Luke Castellan x unclaimed afab!reader warnings: very basic mentions of a panic attack, reader may become a bit descriptive for plot reasons but over all still ambiguous, kinda slowburn Chapter one of my Two Threads of Yarn series masterlist - found here

Violence. Incessant violence fuels the world; it is a never-ending cycle. Become hurt, be hurt, cause hurt. Violence is an unquestionable human quality. A survival instinct. Be weary so you do not get hurt. This was your mantra; until one day, your heart got the better of your head. 

The silver of Artemis’s chariot reflected gently off the serene waters. The cold nipped at your skin with welcome fervour as you dug your hands into the frosty, smooth pebbles. Absentmindedly, you clenched your fists. Sometimes, especially during the day, you would not feel your fingertips for your toes. Sometimes, they would become ghostly appendages, turning almost transparent. You picked up a rock. Smooth and flat and the striking colour of soot. It was dotted with fractures, scarring the surface. With a huff, you extended your arm and threw it into the lake. It hit the water, skipped once, then sank. You flexed your fingers again, clinging on to the sensation of touch. Sighing, you got up, brushing away phantom dust off your clothes, making your way back to an impersonal bunk in the Hermes cabin. 

Noon rolled about the next day. The days were getting longer and the nights were getting shorter. You grimaced internally at the thought. Adorned in your usual sun-blocking attire underneath your distressed camp half blood shirt, you fixed your hair and put on a pair of battered aviators. Again, you grimaced at the brightness of the sun. Desperately praying for some form of cloud cover. 

The sun stayed shining. Haughty. You picked at the food on your plate as the majority of your cabin mates got up to sacrifice a portion of their meals to the fire burning in the brazier. You had gotten used to the practice after a month or so. And after a year, you’ve accepted the hard truth. You were never going to be claimed. It wasn’t like your other cabinmates, they all had some form of parentage even though . Alabaster, was a child of Hecate while Ethan was a child of Nemesis. ‘They were claimed, even though they didn’t have cabins, they were still claimed.” Your thoughts had wandered until they had turned dark and menacing. ‘Is my mother so ashamed of me that she doesn’t even want to claim me?’ Subconsciously, a finger came to where your – otherwise normally dark hair – was marred white. It was one of the many ugly scars on your body. ‘I’m a tree,’ you thought to yourself. ‘I watch people come and go, they are a chapter to me but to them, I’m a novelty. A picture in a book, glimpsed at and tuned over. I can’t move from where my roots are. I let people hurt me and use me…’ memories of innumerable moves and innumerable fake friends flit through your mind like autumn leaves carried by the wind. 

‘... I can’t move from where my roots are.”

You had not realised that you were zoned out until your gaze met with two brown eyes. A sudden chill entered your body, seeped into your veins. You had met these very same eyes multitudinous times before. And with a startelling realisation you wondered why you hadn’t seen it before. Behind a veil of serenity; Luke Castellan’s warm brown eyes were stormy. And violent.   

And suddenly, there was a part of you that wanted to delve inside his mind and his thoughts and his experiences and know everything about him. Uncharacteristically, almost impulsively, you offered a smile. A stray thought dashed through your mind. 

‘Maybe you and I are not so different after all’

LUKE

It was apparent today that there were always new things people were capable of. When he locked eyes – or rather tinted sunglasses – with you, a chill went down his spine. Subconsciously he could feel the weight of your gaze, and an unsettling feeling washed over him.  Almost as if you could see behind his masquerade. 

It unsettled him.

But at the same time, he couldn’t help but be curious; thoughts ran rampant in his head. ‘Who are you, who’s your godly parent, how did you get here, what are you doing to me…’ Luke offered a smirk in return and reluctantly turned his head back to his friends who had already sat down at the far end of the Hermes table. Away from you.

When he turned back around to glimpse at you, you were holding you left hand to your chest, re-adjusting the tinted glasses, clumsily putting on your cap and briskly walking towards the dorms – following a trail of shade offered by towering oak and birch and conifer. 

[cloudy-li]

masterlist!

🧶TWO THREADS OF YARN chapter one - through your masquerade chapter two - the circumstances of our meeting chapter three - together, we'll change the world filler chapter - about tangibility chapter four - childhood's end chapter five - a lesson on the art of misdirection

[cloudy-li]

AWW tysm!! 💗

about tangibility

luke castellan x unclaimed afab!reader no warnings 'In which two broken people find a semblance of comfort within each other.' A story from 'Two Threads of Yarn', a pjo series that i'm working on (hopefully) encompassing pjo, hoo and toa :) [sorry if there's any misspellings or grammar mistakes (-_-)]

The night was dark and full of terrors. Yet, sitting side by side on the pebbly embankment of the lake, shrouded by towering conifers, two teenagers felt more alive than ever. Newly befriended, you and Luke passed the restless nights — when neither could sleep — together by the lake.

In great succession, smoothened pebbles were grasped, tilted, aimed and skimmed on the surface of the lake. Sending mesmerizing ripples across the silver surface. “Ah-ha! Seven skims!” You exclaim jovially, fists pumping in the air victoriously. “Nahh, I only saw five,” from his position on the ground, sitting cross-legged, Luke held your gaze. Stern. Serious. You furrowed your brows and squinted at the surface of the lake. “No~, are you sure? I swear —” Your sentence was cut-off when you glimpsed the shit-eating grin on Luke’s face. “Luke!” You whined exasperatedly, storming over a few feet to where he was. You shoved him half-heartedly as you sat down next to him. “Mmh, sorry starlight.” You rolled. Your eyes but at the same time, couldn't suppress the smile that ghiddly made its way onto your face.

The two of you fell into comfortable silence. Shoulder to shoulder, fingers only centimeters apart from one anothers. Suddenly, you were aware of the silvery halo that adorned Luke's tousled hair, liquid silver outlining every curl of his hair and every curve of his face. Even his eyes which were usually a warm brown were now darker, deeper, more soulful and highlighted with silver. And then, instantaneously, your stomach clenched, trying to suppress a flurry of butterflies. Then, your ribs tightened and your heart and you felt as if you were suckerpunched in the windpipe. Abruptly, you inhaled and realized. You really wanted to hold his hand, and kiss his cheek, his eyes, his nose, his scar, his lips. You knew, with a startling realization, that you wanted Luke to hold you, and put his lips on yours.

“I was wondering…” you broke out of your trance, managing to muster a measly “mmh?” Luke's hand drifted towards your face ‘his hands are so pretty’. His fingers settled on a distinct lock of hair, fingertips ghosting along its length. “I was wondering how you got this… You told me you weren’t born with it, so how…?” Luke seemed to trail off as you yourself reached for that lock of silvery hair. A great marring sight juxtaposed vividly against your other dark locks.

“Honestly, I don’t think I remember very much of it.” You started off. “I was young, maybe four or five, and all I remember is this weird dream,” You paused briefly, trying to recollect fragments of your childhood memory. “It was really, really dark. But at the same time, there was light as well – like a vast night sky. And then, I saw faces, figures – I think – I remember; one was very bright – like the sun – and another looked really old and smelt like almonds – And then, I remember waking up and my father being shocked at my hair.” You finished, silently trailing off to glance at Luke. He looked to be in deep thought. ‘Gods, I wanna kiss him so bad’ You went to tuck a stray hair behind your ear. Once, twice, thrice, you missed. Furrowing your brows, you bought your hand into the moonlight.

And froze.

Ice creeped up your veins and the breaths you took began to seem more and more laborious. Your chest constricted. Luke was brought out of his stupor by heavy breaths. Panicked, he turned towards you and frantically examined your hands. Where your fingers should have been, there was nought left but near-transparent mirages of your fingers outlined by a blackish shimmer. Luke immediately gathered you in his arms. On instinct, he instructed you to bring your knees to your chest and gently gilded your head until it was almost between your knees. Sitting behind, with you in his arms, Luke stroked your hair until heavy breaths and sobs gave way for slow calming breaths accompanied by the occasional sniffle. “Sorry… Again…” you mumbled out ashamed. Luke shifted so that he was facing your side. “Starlight, you don’t need to say sorry…I meant it when I said that I’m here for you.” Luke tucked the stray lock of hair behind your ear, absentmindedly. You clenched and unclenched your fists. The transparence was retreating giving back to tangible flesh and bone. Luke enclosed one of your hands in his. “Thank you,” you breathed out. You hung your head for a while but eventually managed to lift your head and lock your eyes with Luke. ‘I want this.’

“Kiss me.” “Hmm… Starlight?” “Kiss me Luke, please.” “Starlight are you sure? You’re not really–” “Luke, just kiss me, please.”

And with that desperate plea, any semblance of restraint melted away as Luke touched his lips to yours, and it felt soothing. Not shocking, or electric. Luke felt like a welcome chilly breeze on a hot summer's day where you were burning up and fading out. He was soft and he was gentle but there was also passion, reined back. He handled you with care, the same way the ocean guilds a sailor home, and yet have the power to break his ship and his soul if it ever wished to. But more than anything, Luke’s lips against yours was something tangible. Something to hold onto as you phase in and out of reality. He was your anchor, keeping you in his world. Luke broke the kiss to pepper your neck with featherlight touches. And you reciprocated. Kissing his cheeks, his eyes, his nose… You hesitated at the scar. Your hand traveled to cup his cheek.

“Can I…”

He gave no response except for a single nod before going back to pepper the conjunction between your jaw and your neck in kisses. And gingerly, ever so softly, you traced your thumb across his scar. Luke came to rest his forehead against yours, closing his eyes and enjoying the sensation of your touch. And then, you leaned in to place a soft kiss underneath his eye. You came to rest your head on his shoulder, peppering kisses near his collarbones.

“I love you. You whispered.”

“I love you too, Starlight,” he whispered back. Chin resting upon your head as you both basked in each other's presence. Two broken souls searching for something tangible in a world where uncertainty and danger were wholly rife, bathed in a silver glow underneath the vast night sky.

Somewhere, The Fates twisted two strings of yarn into one.

[cloudy-li]

about tangibility

luke castellan x unclaimed afab!reader no warnings 'In which two broken people find a semblance of comfort within each other.' A story from 'Two Threads of Yarn', a pjo series that i'm working on (hopefully) encompassing pjo, hoo and toa :) [sorry if there's any misspellings or grammar mistakes (-_-)]

The night was dark and full of terrors. Yet, sitting side by side on the pebbly embankment of the lake, shrouded by towering conifers, two teenagers felt more alive than ever. Newly befriended, you and Luke passed the restless nights — when neither could sleep — together by the lake.

In great succession, smoothened pebbles were grasped, tilted, aimed and skimmed on the surface of the lake. Sending mesmerizing ripples across the silver surface. “Ah-ha! Seven skims!” You exclaim jovially, fists pumping in the air victoriously. “Nahh, I only saw five,” from his position on the ground, sitting cross-legged, Luke held your gaze. Stern. Serious. You furrowed your brows and squinted at the surface of the lake. “No~, are you sure? I swear —” Your sentence was cut-off when you glimpsed the shit-eating grin on Luke’s face. “Luke!” You whined exasperatedly, storming over a few feet to where he was. You shoved him half-heartedly as you sat down next to him. “Mmh, sorry starlight.” You rolled. Your eyes but at the same time, couldn't suppress the smile that ghiddly made its way onto your face.

The two of you fell into comfortable silence. Shoulder to shoulder, fingers only centimeters apart from one anothers. Suddenly, you were aware of the silvery halo that adorned Luke's tousled hair, liquid silver outlining every curl of his hair and every curve of his face. Even his eyes which were usually a warm brown were now darker, deeper, more soulful and highlighted with silver. And then, instantaneously, your stomach clenched, trying to suppress a flurry of butterflies. Then, your ribs tightened and your heart and you felt as if you were suckerpunched in the windpipe. Abruptly, you inhaled and realized. You really wanted to hold his hand, and kiss his cheek, his eyes, his nose, his scar, his lips. You knew, with a startling realization, that you wanted Luke to hold you, and put his lips on yours.

“I was wondering…” you broke out of your trance, managing to muster a measly “mmh?” Luke's hand drifted towards your face ‘his hands are so pretty’. His fingers settled on a distinct lock of hair, fingertips ghosting along its length. “I was wondering how you got this… You told me you weren’t born with it, so how…?” Luke seemed to trail off as you yourself reached for that lock of silvery hair. A great marring sight juxtaposed vividly against your other dark locks.

“Honestly, I don’t think I remember very much of it.” You started off. “I was young, maybe four or five, and all I remember is this weird dream,” You paused briefly, trying to recollect fragments of your childhood memory. “It was really, really dark. But at the same time, there was light as well – like a vast night sky. And then, I saw faces, figures – I think – I remember; one was very bright – like the sun – and another looked really old and smelt like almonds – And then, I remember waking up and my father being shocked at my hair.” You finished, silently trailing off to glance at Luke. He looked to be in deep thought. ‘Gods, I wanna kiss him so bad’ You went to tuck a stray hair behind your ear. Once, twice, thrice, you missed. Furrowing your brows, you bought your hand into the moonlight.

And froze.

Ice creeped up your veins and the breaths you took began to seem more and more laborious. Your chest constricted. Luke was brought out of his stupor by heavy breaths. Panicked, he turned towards you and frantically examined your hands. Where your fingers should have been, there was nought left but near-transparent mirages of your fingers outlined by a blackish shimmer. Luke immediately gathered you in his arms. On instinct, he instructed you to bring your knees to your chest and gently gilded your head until it was almost between your knees. Sitting behind, with you in his arms, Luke stroked your hair until heavy breaths and sobs gave way for slow calming breaths accompanied by the occasional sniffle. “Sorry… Again…” you mumbled out ashamed. Luke shifted so that he was facing your side. “Starlight, you don’t need to say sorry…I meant it when I said that I’m here for you.” Luke tucked the stray lock of hair behind your ear, absentmindedly. You clenched and unclenched your fists. The transparence was retreating giving back to tangible flesh and bone. Luke enclosed one of your hands in his. “Thank you,” you breathed out. You hung your head for a while but eventually managed to lift your head and lock your eyes with Luke. ‘I want this.’

“Kiss me.” “Hmm… Starlight?” “Kiss me Luke, please.” “Starlight are you sure? You’re not really–” “Luke, just kiss me, please.”

And with that desperate plea, any semblance of restraint melted away as Luke touched his lips to yours, and it felt soothing. Not shocking, or electric. Luke felt like a welcome chilly breeze on a hot summer's day where you were burning up and fading out. He was soft and he was gentle but there was also passion, reined back. He handled you with care, the same way the ocean guilds a sailor home, and yet have the power to break his ship and his soul if it ever wished to. But more than anything, Luke’s lips against yours was something tangible. Something to hold onto as you phase in and out of reality. He was your anchor, keeping you in his world. Luke broke the kiss to pepper your neck with featherlight touches. And you reciprocated. Kissing his cheeks, his eyes, his nose… You hesitated at the scar. Your hand traveled to cup his cheek.

“Can I…”

He gave no response except for a single nod before going back to pepper the conjunction between your jaw and your neck in kisses. And gingerly, ever so softly, you traced your thumb across his scar. Luke came to rest his forehead against yours, closing his eyes and enjoying the sensation of your touch. And then, you leaned in to place a soft kiss underneath his eye. You came to rest your head on his shoulder, peppering kisses near his collarbones.

“I love you. You whispered.”

“I love you too, Starlight,” he whispered back. Chin resting upon your head as you both basked in each other's presence. Two broken souls searching for something tangible in a world where uncertainty and danger were wholly rife, bathed in a silver glow underneath the vast night sky.

Somewhere, The Fates twisted two threads of yarn into one.

[cloudy-li]

finally free

flowers blooming

the world so bright

as he climbs his school stairs

Flight by flight

the moon is up

and the halls are vacant

he takes off his shoes

thoughts running rampant

neatly, he places them together 

tucking the white envelope under

making sure it doesn't fly away.

as the chilly night wind kisses his skin 

He bows his head.

walking to the rooftop's edge.

he mutters an apology quietly

So only the wind, moon and stars hear what he says.

he takes a step towards the ledge

then another, as he plummets to his Silent death

He feels a sharp pain

and then silence and quietness

as day breaks his parents’ hearts

as his classmates place chrysanthemums on his desk

he smiles down, finally happy.

finally free.

[cloudy-li]

CHERRY BLOSSOMS.

a love story bloomed with the cherry blossoms one spring, but spring doesn’t last forever 

Cherry blossoms are blooming 

Bright pink stars in a cosmos of green and grey

Cherry blossoms are blooming 

Signalling new beginnings 

New families, new friends, new work

Thawing the harsh ice of winter 

Cherry blossoms are blooming 

So why can’t i still move on 

I think it's because you are not here 

Cherry blossoms are blooming 

So why hasn’t my heart thawed 

Why is it stuck in the never ending winter 

Cherry blossoms are blooming

I know i should move on, so why can’t I

Cherry blossoms

They remind me of you 

The pink petals in your  hair 

Splotches of pink in a sea of black 

Cherry blossoms

They fall gently around us

I remember you presenting me a petal 

They are blooming

Blooming so brightly 

They fall around my fingers 

Onto the smooth stone 

I lean my forehead against your grave

And bid you goodbye 

For i will remember you in cherry blossoms 

I wish you were here to see th

[cloudy-li]

words I couldn’t say 

a crappy poem I wrote after my friend kept talking about her bf and their dreamlike life and I couldn’t take it anymore. I don’t expect anything from this, enjoy I guess.

Raindrops fall 

Masking my tears from you

They blend in with my tears

As you walk away 

Raindrops fall

It's raining harder now 

Two years have passed

But i'm still not over you

Raindrops fall

I remember you 

As it pours outside 

Your smile and phantom touch

Raindrops fall 

As i stand outside 

I regret that day 

My words were washed away by the rain

I like you. I love you. 

[cloudy-li]

stays, are you feeling lonely yet? because I certainly am... *starts crying while watching this on repeat*

[cloudy-li]

FRAGMENTS.

@ 2022 cloudy-li. do not translate, copy, or repost without permission

genre - angst 

pairing - Konshu x gn!reader, slight Steven grant x gn!reader  

synopsis - you meet someone whom you barely remember – so why do you feel such a strange connection to them, as if you’ve known each other before...

note - this is unedited so I apologize for any typos or grammatical errors >< enjoy!

The sheer grandeur of the museum was something that you could never get over. The towering marble columns and pristine floors to the momentous sandstone bricks at the entrance was something that drew you here every time. 

The museum seemed a bit busier than today, though you didn't mind the chatter – the white noise was happily appreciated – as you walked around the multiple exhibits. 

"Oof–" 

Whilst you were caught up within your own thoughts, you had managed to unceremoniously bump into a stranger, causing boxes of stuffed toys to fly into the air and land with soft thuds on the marble floors. 

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" You took a step back and hand to your mouth before kneeling down to help who you guess was an employee pick up the soft toys. The man ruffled his hair, "i-its quit-te alright" he spoke with a British accent, nervously fidgeting with his fingers as he kneeled down to pick them up too

"Here you go, this is the last one' you said as you stood up from the floor. "T-thank You, you r-really did-n't have to h-help me" you smiled at him, before reading his badge as he too got up. 

"Steven, right?" 

"Y-yeah, Steven w-with a V"

You laughed. But that laugh slowly faded as you got a better view of his face – his eyes – there was something about them that you just couldn't shake off. 

"H-have I met you before?" You asked him as he started walking towards the giftshop box in hand. 

Steven turned to you, "I- I don't think so…" his eyebrows creased in confusion as he desperately tried to remember if he had seen or met you somewhere before. "I-im terribly sorry, I c-can't remember"

You sighed. "Yeah...it 's okay, I might just be hallucinating haha…" you scratched the back of your neck as you quietly apologized to Steven as he got back to his job. 

You were about to wave him goodbye when something caught your eye in the distance. "Steven," you tapped him on the shoulder. "Steven do you see that" you spoke quickly and Steven could detect a sense of urgency in your voice. 

He turned around from where he was standing – perpendicular to the giftshop – and looked around. "I don't see a-anything…" he turned back around to face you, touching your shoulder lightly "hey, a-are you sure you are okay…?" 

You couldn't really hear what Steven was saying. Your eyes were focused on a specific spot near one of the marble columns where you swore you saw something. 

Steven's firm grip on your shoulders brought you back into reality, "are you s-sure you are okay?" You looked back to Steven's concerned deep brown eyes. You shook your head. "Steven, I'm fine rea–" 

You took a step back. Eyes winding slightly as you looked over Steven's shoulder to a face you knew all too well. You couldn't exactly remember anything else other than a name so you decided to risk it. Call out his name.

"Konshu…?"

[cloudy-li]

no because lee know literally poisoned the rest of the members...  🤣😭

like and reblog! (*^_^*)

[cloudy-li]

きれいでしょう？☀️🏡 [*sigh*] felix looks so pretty today... and the fields too!

please like and reblog, thank you! (>ω< ))

[cloudy-li]

it's the same and I'm crying bc of it