embrace13

[embrace13]

Let's get this week off on a great note...

Give yourself a compliment (or 2, or 3). Right now. A sincere one. Take note of you and all the incredible and awesome things you do. Compliment yourself. You deserve it.

(Want to share your self-compliment(s) with us? #Compliment13)

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Habits

Getting away from the groundwork we've been laying the past week or two...this exercise is intended to get you thinking about who you are, and why you're that person.

Think about the worst, and best habits you picked up from your parents. Write a list of the worst ways you're like them and the best ways. Take the list and use it to brainstorm ways (in whatever form works for you - essay, notes, mind-map, etc.) you can break those bad habits (learn from your parents mistakes) and ways you can take the great habits and nurture them.

Want to share? Tag it #Habits13.

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Quick exercise!

Stop what you're doing (or wait until you're at a good stopping point) and write your plan for the weekend: What are your goals? When will you do them? When will you have 'mental health' time? How will you refresh before next week starts? (Feel like sharing? #Weekend13

REMEMBER - getting your plan down, scheduling things, etc. makes you more likely to do those things!

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A common new year's resolution is to get healthier. Cooking Light put together a list of 100 healthy (not just cooking-related) tips. Check them out!

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Rewards!

Here's something fun!

For the last "exercise" of the week, you get to figure out your prizes. Everyone needs an incentive system!

Start thinking about ways, both large and small, that you can reward yourself, AND when you will reward yourself.

Of course you need to reward yourself when you've accomplished a BIG goal. But you should also get some rewards for the achieving those mini-goals we talked about yesterday.

Decide for yourself the frequency of the rewards and what they will be. So maybe - after a week or two of making it to the gym on all your scheduled days you treat yourself to a nail-polish, or book, or some other small prize you've been coveting. After a month? Make it a little bigger - a mani/pedi, a ticket to a show. Whatever! This is about you and the things that are going to motivate you!

As I said, this is the last exercise for the week, next week we will move beyond the lists. I'll still be posting this week though - resources and other fun stuff!

OH! And if you want to share your rewards ideas - tag them #rewards13!

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Three months

So...you've got this list of the things you want to accomplish. You've decided when you will work on those things. Now it's time to get planning and going.

Which of your goals will you be working on from now until the end of March? That's the first quarter of the year and for now we will isolate our efforts on just the projects you'll be working on during that time period.

Let's further isolate each project as well. Give each project its own post, page, whatever. Break each project down into steps, or, in some cases smaller goals.

Here are some examples:

If your goal is to lose ten pounds this year, and you intend to work on it all year, you may have some smaller goals within that - stop drinking soda, start cooking dinners at home, getting to the gym three times a week, etc.

If your goal is to save money, smaller goals may be to bring your own coffee to work everyday instead of buying it, to put some fraction of your paycheck in the bank each week, etc.

Do you see where I'm going? Within each goal there is the potential for many smaller goals. And it's achieving those smaller goals that gives us the confidence, energy and enthusiasm to strive for the larger goal.

So take some time over the next couple of days breaking each big goal into smaller goals. From there - schedule these things. I know it sounds weird, but trust me, it works. Having something scheduled increases your likelihood to do it.

What does scheduling mean?

Let's take an example from above. If you wanted to lose ten pounds, and you broke that down into the smaller goals I listed, you would 1.) Set a time to dump all the soda from your house, 2.) Plan your dinners, the shopping trip to get the ingredients and the time you will cook those dinners every day, 3.) Decide here and now what days you will go to the gym this week and at what time.

Here's something to take into account though - don't OVERplan. You never ever want to set yourself up to fail. If you know that work travel, or school conflicts or any other thing may not allow you to plan for more than one week in advance, don't attempt to plan for more than one week in advance.

But, that being said, work into your schedule the next time you will work on scheduling. So, you can only schedule with confidence from now until next Monday? Fine. But set a time next Monday when you will work on your next schedule.

Make sense?

Once you have your days and times scheduled, you should actually put them on a calendar, in your planner, in your google calendar - wherever - but set them in stone and keep them as appointments. Don't let anyone try to schedule something with you during those times.

This exercise can take a lot of thinking but can also be really rewarding because you begin to see your goals as achievable - they're really just a bunch of smaller, easier sub goals.

Good luck! If you want to share your planning with us, tag your posts #planning13. Either later today or tomorrow I will share some resources and tomorrow we will talk about rewards!

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Back on track!

Sorry! As I said yesterday, I've been under the weather for some time, but I'm so glad to be feeling well enough to get back to business here!

We're going to keep working with the lists from last week. Today, take that list and start thinking about each goal on it, and the time required to accomplish it. Is it something you can do in a day? week? month? year? Next to each item given an estimate of how much time you'll need.

Of course some goals may be things you work on all year. Others may be things you can sit down and do in a day or two. Give yourself a very honest estimate of how long you need for each one. (Remember, the goal here is not to impress yourself with how quickly you can do things, the goal is to actually get things done, and done well!)

Once you have your estimates, decide when you'll do these things. A big part of the reason people don't accomplish their goals each year (and maybe give up rather quickly) is because they try to do everything at once. Don't do that! There's no reason to do that!

As I said a moment ago, some things you may work on throughout the year. That's fine. Space out when you start them. If you want to start working out three times a week and also want to start writing 4 times a week, don't start all that on the same day. Start the working out, give yourself a good amount of time to get into a habit (a few weeks? a month? whatever works for you) and then start the writing.

Some goals may only require a couple days or hours. If you have no hard deadlines, start them later in the year, after you have made good progress and forward motion on your ongoing goals.

I hope that all made sense.

To summarize - Figure out how long each goal will take you, and when you you would like to start it. Get all that down somewhere, online, on paper, whatever. Just have it in a form that allows you to look at it and read it (i.e. - not in your brain).

Good luck and if you have any questions email me. (Want to share? Tag it #Planning13)

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I've been quite sick, but I'm finally out of bed and getting my act together. I'll be back tomorrow with another exercise, but for now, here's an excellent quote to contemplate, and even write about if you're feeling inspired.

Sorry for the unexplained absence

“Picture yourself when you were five. In fact, dig out a photo of little you at that time and tape it to your mirror. How would you treat her, love her, feed her? How would you nurture her if you were the mother of little you? I bet you would protect her fiercely while giving her space to spread her itty-bitty wings. She’d get naps, healthy food, imagination time, and adventures into the wild. If playground bullies hurt her feelings, you’d hug her tears away and give her perspective. When tantrums or meltdowns turned her into a poltergeist, you’d demand a loving time-out in the naughty chair. From this day forward I want you to extend that same compassion to your adult self.”

― Kris Carr

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What to do next with your letter...

This is an easy one...easier than writing a letter at least. Take the note you wrote yourself yesterday and look at all the wonderful things that you did in 2013. Now list them.

Get rid of the letter details and color and simply construct a list. Maybe you saved money, changed your eating habits and learned french. Great! Write it down on paper, online* or a word doc somewhere and have a good tangible list of things you "did" in 2013. We'll be coming back to it. A lot.

That's all for today, but I'd love to hear from you. Please share your goals with me. I promise that in addition to throwing exercises out there, I will post resources as well. Knowing what people are working on will help me tailor that!

*Want to share your list with us? Tag it #list1231

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Put it in a letter!

As promised...the first Embrace13 exercise!

Today, write yourself a letter...but date it December 31, 2013. In other words, imagine you, on New Year's eve (roughly 350 days from now) and write to yourself today, looking back on the year you had. Write about your accomplishments and the fun you had, maybe even about some harder times you had and how you dealt with them. If you'd like to share your letter (or a section of it) with us, please tag it #embrace13 and/or #letter1231.

Why?

This is an adaptation of an exercise I read that some writers do. Prior to even writing a word of their next piece, some writers will write a glowing review for the (not-yet-written) novel. Having all those accolades (ex - "The plot was riveting but laser focused, each character was developed exquisitely and expertly...") gives them something to focus on, during the writing process. Having this sort of emotional backbone for the process helps them avoid the pitfalls of distractions or generally getting lazy.

Good luck!

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So how does this work?

As promised...here's your 5Ws post!

Who should participate in Embrace 13?

Well the easy answer to that is - anybody. This is a project designed for people who like to take an active role in their lives. We're going to reflect on our decision-making, and our patterns, activities, and habits. From there, we'll figure out strategies and tactics for achieving our goals.

This may be of specific interest to people with personal blogs, those who like to journal, or aspiring/working essayists.

So what is it?

I'm hesitant to call this a series of assignments, but in a way, I guess that's what it is. Each day (or perhaps every other day, or every third day) I will post an exercise - something for you to reflect on, write about, or attempt to implement in your day-to-day life. You should always feel free to only do those that you think pertain to you. Although if I'm doing my job correctly, hopefully most/all of them will.

And where, exactly, am I reflecting on and writing all this stuff?

Of course that's up to you! Some people may feel entirely comfortable blogging all their work. That's perfectly fine and tags will be provided for each exercise, so you can find other people doing the same reflecting and writing. If you're a journal person you may want to get it all down in your journal. That's fine too and likely the tactic I will take. However, never hesitate to share a paragraph or two with us here on tumblr. Again, we can easily find each other using the tags. And, if you think you would just like to read the prompts and contemplate them all in your head, that's fine too! Seriously, whatever works for you. The important thing is that you take charge of your year, and accomplish what you're setting out to accomplish.

I'm so busy already, why would I want to add on more stuff to do?

Only you can answer that, maybe you don't want to. But the truth is, the busiest people can probably benefit the most these exercises. As I said before, we'll be identifying some of our good and bad habits, and patterns. Having the knowledge of these things, can really help a person figure out ways to make the most of their time and be the most efficient and productive.

Fine, you've convinced me...when do we start?

Glad to have you on board! The first exercise will be posted at 11am (EST) tomorrow (January 15, 2013). I will tag EVERYTHING I post here with #embrace13, so if you're worried you may miss a post, please add that to your tracked tags...

Okay, and how do I make sure this is actually beneficial to me?

Well for starters you need to be open and honest in all your answers. Don't give answers or responses you wish were true, give the ones that are true (and we can work on getting you to where you wish you were). If being honest with some things is too personal, don't worry about it. Make those posts private, or write them in a journal or just in a Word doc. You should never share something you're not comfortable with sharing.

That said, if you decide to share any/all of your posts, please make sure to tag them appropriately. Part of what makes exercises like these so enriching is reading what other people share. Someone may share something personal about their life that you realize is applicable to yours. Or perhaps the way someone else articulates something will 'click' with you in a new way. (On that note, invite your friends and followers to participate as well! )

So with that in mind, be open and reserve judgment...of yourself and others. Be open to new ideas and ways of doing things, and don't judge others (or yourself) for ideas and approaches.

I hope I've covered all of your concerns. Feel free to send me an ask if you have more questions. And please note, if you send me an ask and would prefer I don't answer it publicly, please let me know. Also, if you're open to a public response, but with your name removed, let me know that too.

See you tomorrow at 11am for the first exercise...until then!

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Welcome to 2013!

Welcome to Embrace '13! This is something I attempted to do last year, but for a variety of reasons, was unable to. But 2013 is here now (and we've had a couple of weeks to adjust). I'd like to give it another try.

I created this site because I loved doing Reverb10 and Reverb11. I loved the way those projects required participants to reflect on the past year and plan for the next. I realized, though, that it would be useful (to me, at least) to do such work throughout the year.

This site is not designed to provide therapy. I'm not a therapist and I'm in no way promising to solve your problems. However, I do believe that dedicating some time to conscientiously thinking about our choices and how we function as people can help us all in our personal journeys.

Still interested? A who, what, where, why, when and how post is coming soon (within the hour...Stayed tuned! And I hope to you participating. Happy 2013, let's embrace the year!