froggywritessometims

[froggywritessometims]

Our deaths are not worth second look,

the easy route, ignoring us;

when ignoring is hard, when you cut your ear off, they lock you away,

when they release you you are shot in the chest

and they call the bullet your own.

And the doctor leaves you

for 30 hours

to die.

And their heart aches for your brother, not you, not the dead.

[froggywritessometims]

🕊️🇵🇸

[froggywritessometims]

"why do you care?" I am asked in other words by my dad when I mention it,

I want to tell him about the blood and the dead with lost names I see every morning,

but people my age aren't meant to see that. 1,023,771 children see it every day, in real life.

And how are you meant to describe the body of a child covered in the dust of their home? He's never seen that.

And he cant picture 2,200,000 people or 37,000+ dead bodies, so what am I meant to say?

He can't picture a hospital running without power or anesthesia. He can't picture war in the middle east were it isn't 'just' oil so what am I meant to say?

A pacifist in theory.

[froggywritessometims]

Mania

Mania The birdsDon’t singThey speakSpeak to meTheir secretsTheir lovesThey tell meEverything The noises, the noisesICould screamThat lullabySo loudIt was makingMy head explodeThe noises, the noisesThe kettleMy parent’s voicesAnd my headIn pieces The euphoriaThe singingThe laughing so loudlyI’m never tiredGuess who worked outAt midnight? My mind is so busyRacing and flyingNew ideas float…

[froggywritessometims]

the world feels as if it is tracking on just because thats what its told to do. this teacher doesn't really want to be here teaching a room full of brain fried children how America concord the commies with missiles again. we'd all rather be rotting at home instead of here. but i will take the next best thing, drawing little Irish houses on the corners of french assignments long past due and think about my escape. but i know it is all a lie, i can not live in a little irish home away from everything else with some sheep and chickens. to exist you have to have money and to have money you have to have a job, a real job. but i can pretend, just for a little while longer.

[froggywritessometims]

Things Joe Biden is too "powerless" to do:

Cancel student debt

Deschedule and legalize marijuana

Cap inflation

Protect the legal status of abortion

Effectively combat COVID-19

Meaningful healthcare reform

Combat climate change

Things Joe Biden is perfectly capable of doing with zero support:

Fully enable a genocide of the Palestinian people

[froggywritessometims]

i can still hear the snakes hissing. hissing about everything we said. hissing about how much they hate us. hissing so quietly to each other, but we still hear/d. they'd hiss so loudly while they covered their mouths with their hands, like mean girls do in movies about American highschools. except they weren't gossiping about who had the ugliest dress, it was about our Behaviour/Attitude/Symptoms/meds/therapy. when they were done hissing to each other they would glare at us and write something down before walking away to go do their job.

[froggywritessometims]

Sick people beg for doctors offices to be open on Christmas only to get some asshole going "oh what, you wanna FORCE people to WORK on CHRISTMAS????"

Bitch I don't get to decide when my stomach gets a hole eaten into its lining. Also I've been denied multiple jobs just for saying I need shabbat off because I'm Jewish and forbidden from working on shabbat. But I'm probably gonna be forced to anyways when I find one. Maybe we should idk HIRE MORE NON-CHRISTIANS IN THE HEALTHCARE INDUSTRY. MAYBE WE WOULDN'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM IF HEALTHCARE WASN'T SO DOMINATED BY CHRISTIANS. MAYBE WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO JUST PUT UP WITH THE PAIN AND SICKNESS IF YOU JUST HIRED MORE NON-CHRISTIANS TO WORK IN YOUR DOCTOR'S OFFICES. THEN NO CHRISTIANS WILL BE FORCED TO WORK ON THEIR SACRED HOLIDAYS AND WE WON'T HAVE TO IGNORE SERIOUS HEALTH ISSUES THAT DECIDED NOT TO PAY ATTENTION TO THE CALENDAR. MAYBE THIS WOULD EVEN BE BETTER FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED.

[froggywritessometims]

Pills

[pt: Pills]

tw, coercion, mental hospital

i had to take two pills every day in the hospital.

one was meant to stop my period, it made it go in forever. i couldn't get to see a doctor for help, i was stuck with cramps and blood the whole 14 days i was there.

the second was an antidepressant. an SSRI, they never told me what it was called. i didn't have depression, they just gave it to me. it made me sick. i haven't felt well since they made me take them.

in the "hold" they got tired of me acting up they told me i had to take a little white pill or they would take all my things. i was so angry with the stupid nurse i threw a juice box at her. she yelled at me for being immature i think, but isn't that a normal response to being coerced into taking a little white pill?

[froggywritessometims]

TW, mental hospital, restraints

in the "hold" there was/is a kid. 12 years old. he was/is autistic. he spent/spends all day in his room, probably just the same as mine. hospital bed in the center in front of the big glass door, a sofa by that, and some old medical equipment that hangs from the seiling. the "hold" user to be the ICU for little babies, they made a new ICU and so they dumped the kids like us there instead when they had no place left to lock us away.

the kid, he was/is autistic. the nurses didn't like him. he was loud all the time, playing sounds on the tablets they gave us. the tablets were/are in big chunky blue cases.

when the nurses got tired of him getting up and running around his room and slamming into walls the nurses would use restraints on him. he would scream so loud. he would cry and cry while the nurses would set a timer on their phones, they were only allowed to tie up kids for a set amount of time, i think it was something like an hour and a half. i dont know.

i never got tied down like he did/is. i never saw the restraints. are they like they are in movies? like they are in Girl, Interrupted? brown leather straps attached to the bed that wont let go. when i try to imagine them i always imagine them as blue, the same colour as plastic kids cars. sometimes i think their like snakes. constricting their prey. except we are not the snakes prey, we are their sacrifice. we are sacrificed for the sake of Society and normality. or maybe thats not it maybe i am just insane like i am told and really this is right. maybe they are right and that kid, just 13, was meant to spend his 13th birthday locked up with the snakes. maybe they were right and that is what is good for him and me and every other mad person.

[froggywritessometims]

RAFAH, Gaza Strip (AP) — More than half a million people in Gaza — a quarter of the population — are starving, according to a report Thursday by the U.N. and other agencies that highlights the humanitarian crisis caused by Israel’s bombardment and siege on the territory in response to Hamas’ Oct. 7 attack. The extent of the population’s hunger eclipsed even the near-famines in Afghanistan and Yemen of recent years, according to figures in the report. The report warned that the risk of famine is “increasing each day,” blaming the hunger on insufficient aid entering Gaza. “It doesn’t get any worse,’’ said Arif Husain, chief economist for the U.N.’s World Food Program. “I have never seen something at the scale that is happening in Gaza. And at this speed.” ... At the start of the war, Israel stopped all deliveries of food, water, medicine and fuel into the territory. After U.S. pressure, it allowed a trickle of aid in through Egypt. But U.N. agencies say only 10% of Gaza’s food needs has been entering for weeks. (Dec. 21, 2023 | Source)

DON'T LOOK AWAY.

[froggywritessometims]

i couldn't do NaNoWriMo, had to give up half way

[froggywritessometims]

i can feel my body melting away, i can feel my mind slowly being eaten away, i can feel something is wrong, i can feel that this is slowly killing me, i hate this life, let me go, let me go, please?

[froggywritessometims]

Shoutout to artists with disabilities whose symptoms are an obstacle to their craft. Who draw but their tremors keep them from being able to pull a straight line. Who would spend hours making art if their carpal tunnel and joint pain would let them. Who stare longingly at guitars and pianos but know the instrument's not compatible with their misshapen, webbed, or missing fingers. Whose neurological disease makes it impossible for them to memorize sheet music or play lines. Who have vivid, glorious stories living in their heads that their aphasia won't let them put so clearly on paper. Who spent more time in waiting rooms and hospital beds than rehearsals and recitals. Who resent their bodies for not letting them portray what they see in their minds.

You are not any less of an artist. Your talent is immeasurable. Your creativity is divine. I'm sorry this world wasn't built for you and me, but that doesn't mean we can't still make something beautiful with our lives.

[froggywritessometims]

my disabilities are really kicking my butt lately and im struggling to keep up with writing

[froggywritessometims]

ADHD at night: I could write a book. I could get my Master’s Degree. I could go to the club and come home with 12 new friends. I could get a job at that club and meet the mother of my children. I could cure every disease and use my wealth to bring world peace.

ADHD during the day: Fold laundry too hard :( Come back next week