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Gojo: My son was excited to read that book to me at bedtime.
Nanami: And why are you going to sleep before your son?
Gojo: I am sleepy.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#jujutsu kaisen nanami#nanami jujutsu kaisen#nanami kento#kento nanami#nanami jjk#source: abbott elementary#the way tariq said it radiates gojo energy
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Gojo: When your kids were small, did you ever... I dunno, smack their heads into a wall?
Geto: Usually I just gave time-outs.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo#jjk getou#suguru getou#suguru geto#jujutsu kaisen geto#jjk geto#source: modern family
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Geto: *Whispers something into Gojo’s ear and walks away*
Yuta: Oh my god... What did he just say to you? That, if we don't give him what he wants, he’ll kill you?
Gojo: Worse.
Gojo: He mumbled and I didn’t hear it.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#yuta jujutsu kaisen#jjk yuta#yuta#yuta okkotsu#jjk getou#suguru getou#suguru geto#source: abbott elementary#he 100% just said gibberish to mess with him
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[Gojo & Y/N’s daughter standing in a corner]
Y/N: Don’t move from there. You’re in time out.
[A wild Gojo appears]
Gojo: Mommy put you in time out?
Daughter: Yes.
Gojo: Nobody puts my girl in time out. I’m gonna talk to her.
[Gojo and his daughter standing in the corner]
Gojo: How much time she give you?
Daughter: 20 minutes.
Gojo: 20 minutes? She gave me an hour!
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#Gojo x f!y/n#gojo jjk#gojo jujutsu kaisen#source: tiktok
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Nanami: I don’t want you getting involved with Sorcerer business anymore. If something happens, report it and leave it to us.
Y/N: Fine. When should I hand in my badge and gun?
Nanami: When did you get a badge and gun?!
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#incorrect quotes#nanami jujutsu kaisen#nanami jjk#kento nanami#nanami x you#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#jujutsu kaisen nanami#nanami kento#jujutsu kento#nanami x y/n#source: brooklyn nine nine#source: brooklyn 99
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Geto: Um... sory for hooking up with Y/N last night.
Gojo: …
Geto: Actually I take that back. You droppped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. We're even.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#jjk getou#suguru getou#jujutsu kaisen geto#jjk geto#geto suguru#suguru geto#jujutsu geto#geto x you#geto x y/n#source: texts from last night
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Y/N: At what point should I just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Geto: ..
Shoko: …
Utahime: …
Nanami: Never.
Gojo: >:(
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#incorrect quotes#gojo satoru#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#jjk getou#suguru getou#jujutsu kaisen geto#geto suguru#geto x y/n#geto x you#jjk shoko#jujutsu shoko#shoko x y/n#shoko x you#shoko ieiri#jujutsu utahime#jjk utahime#utahime iori#nanami jjk#nanami jujutsu kaisen#nanami x you#jjk nanami#nanami kento#kento nanami#brother gojo au
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Gojo: It was a mass text, I'm sorry.
Nanami: …
Geto: …
Shoko: …
Utahime: …
Ijichi (for some reason): …
Nanami: Do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#jjk getou#suguru getou#jujutsu kaisen geto#jjk geto#jujutsu shoko#jjk shoko#jujutsu kaisen shoko#shoko ieiri#nanami jjk#nanami jujutsu kaisen#jjk nanami#nanami kento#kento nanami#ijichi kiyotaka#jjk ijichi#jujutsu utahime#jjk utahime#utahime iori
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Megumi: Hey, bro, what do you wanna eat?
Sukuna, appearing on Itadori’s face: The souls of the innocent.
Itadori: A bagel.
Sukuna: Noooo!
Itadori: Two bagel
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#incorrect quotes#megumi jjk#megumi jujutsu kaisen#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#jjk sukuna#ryomen sukuna#jujutsu kaisen itadori#itadori jjk#yuji itadori#yuuji itadori#I’m sure this one has been done before#but I heard the audio earlier and it had me cackling
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Nanami: Initiate Phase 2.
Yuji: I forgot what Phase 2 is, but I'll assume we just run in like we discussed.
Nanami: Affirmative.
Yuji: I'll assume that means "yes".
Nanami: Roger.
Yuji: My name's Itadori.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#incorrect quotes#nanami jujutsu kaisen#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#nanami jjk#jujutsu kaisen nanami#nanami kento#jujutsu kento#kento nanami#jjk yuuji#yuji jjk#yuji jujutsu kaisen#yuji itadori#itadori jjk#jujutsu kaisen itadori#jujutsu itadori#yuuji itadori#jujutsu kaisen yuuji#itadori yuuji
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Gojo: Have you noticed how hot your sibling has gotten?
Geto: …
Gojo: Because I have not.
#jjk#jjk incorrect quotes#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#incorrect quotes#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#jjk getou#jujutsu kaisen geto#jjk geto#geto suguru#suguru geto#jujutsu geto#source: arrow#I’m like pretty sure it’s from arrow#Tommy and Oliver like 93% sure
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