gwydre123456

[gwydre123456]

"depiction is not automatically glorification" can and should coexist with "some depiction is glorification and you need to be able to tell the difference"

[gwydre123456]

The unexpected reason why the drive-through line is so long

[gwydre123456]

This, 10000% this

i had to

[gwydre123456]

*taps microphone* is this thing on? Okay…

🎤 THIS IS A REMINDER THAT ALL OF THE ROBINS ARE SMART, GENIUSES IN FACT. THEY ARE IN A FAMILY OF DETECTIVES. THATS LIKE THEIR WHOLE THING. ALL OF THE ROBINS (AND THE REST OF THE BATFAM TOO) ARE CLEVER, STRATEGIC, AND CAPABLE, NOT JUST TIM. (No hate to my boy Tim, though. I love Tim.) YES, EVEN THAT ONE. Thank you. 🎤

[gwydre123456]

Swoon

Amazonian warrior princess

[gwydre123456]

Reds !

[gwydre123456]

Damian, with red puffy eyes: You too?

Tim, with red puffy eyes: *raises a brow* Yes?

Damian has severe pollen allergies. Tim was high.

[gwydre123456]

Being chronically ill is like

“It’s fine”

“It’s fine”

“It’s fine”

*complete mental breakdown because you can’t do this anymore*

“It’s fine”

[gwydre123456]

Dick: *babysitting as a 20 year old while Bruce is on a date with Selina* here you go! *passes out sandwiches for lunch* go eat ‘em outside, it’s a nice day to have a picnic Jason: mhm Tim: *walks out the door with Damian and the sandwiches, leaving Dick alone* Dick: *stays inside and cleans while they eat* later Bruce: *walks in door* hey guys I’m ho— Damian: Father. Richard refused to feed us unless we would vacate the premises into the heat outside, while he languished in the air conditioning Tim: yeah Jason: *nods* Bruce: Dick: Bruce: Dick: *standing in a spotless kitchen with well-fed children and hair tied back from cleaning for hours* next time you’re hiring someone. I don’t have to stand for this slander.

[gwydre123456]

"love is what makes us human" actually it's 'select all images with boat' but go off I guess

[gwydre123456]

The Batcave has a “Do Not Talk To Me” couch. It’s sacred. It’s unspoken. It’s real.

okay so. picture this:

the batcave has one couch. it's in the corner. it’s hideous. it’s like beige or green or something equally offensive to every one of their aesthetics. no one likes the couch.

and that is exactly why it became sacred.

because one night jason just. drops onto it. full gear. bleeding. absolutely done with life. says nothing. doesn’t even take off the helmet. sits there in silence for 3 hours and then leaves.

next week tim uses it. sits there post-mission. face in hands. someone tries to ask if he’s okay and jason throws a batarang at them.

and thus it began.

Rules of the Do Not Talk To Me Couch:

You sit there? No one speaks to you.

You cry? No you didn’t.

You eat cold noodles off your chest at 4 a.m.? That’s sacred time.

If someone tries to comfort you? They are excommunicated for 12 hours.

Dick (sitting on the couch):

Damian: Grayson, are you—

Jason (from across the cave): HE’S ON THE COUCH.

Jason: I don’t make the rules.

Steph: You LITERALLY made the rules.

Jason: And I am the defender of the rules. There’s a difference.

one time damian storms in. covered in blood. absolutely furious. 10/10 rage goblin energy. throws his sword. marches to the couch. sits. arms crossed. steaming.

tim takes one look at him and goes: “i’m making tea.”

jason: “that’s acceptable. tea is allowed. talking is not.”

bonus:

once bruce sits on it.

and the ENTIRE CAVE goes silent.

tim literally freezes mid-typing. cass stops mid-flip. jason just mutters “oh shit.”

they all leave. immediately.

the couch is not ready for bruce.

extra bonus:

alfred vacuums around the couch. never says a word. leaves snacks in a silent offering. once placed a weighted blanket gently on jason’s shoulder. that’s different. he’s allowed.

[gwydre123456]

I know the popular take is that Jason responds to familial affection by going ew fuck you gtf off me or whatever but to be honest I think if someone actually tried it he's ending up weeping wailing face red sniffling coughing collapsing to his knees in the rain type of reaction just completely sopping pathetic. his eyes are so swollen he can't see shit and falls off a cliff

[gwydre123456]

Yes. What was the intention/spell?

Kitchen witchcraft day 1:

Orange cinnamon rolls and Alton Brown's baked macaroni and cheese. 🍊🧀

The kitchen is trashed.

[gwydre123456]

Another headcannon:

Jason calls Dick "Duckie" from time to time. Some people think it's a mock of Nightwing's eagle symbol.

But the truth is, one day they were texting and Jason sent "Duckie" instead of "Dickie", and Dick liked the nickname so much that convinced Jason to call him like that. Dick's contact in Jason's phone is "Duckie 🦆"

[gwydre123456]

Jason being the only one who gets to mess with his siblings is so valid. He can strangle them but if anyone else so much as looks at them wrong he’s taking them down

Scene: Rooftop fight. The Batfam is mid-mission.

Tim (over comm): Uh… slight problem. Got ambushed. I’m fine, but there’s, like, six of them and—

[Comms cut out with a crunch.]

Jason immediately freezing

“What was that sound?”

Dick: That… did not sound good.

Damian: Tt. Don’t be dramatic.

[No response.]

Jason (quietly but deadly):

I swear, if one hair on that nerd’s head is out of place—

[Cut to: Jason crashing through a window like a furious bat out of hell. Tim is cornered by multiple thugs, holding his side.]

Thug 1: Heh, Red Robin’s looking a little scrambled—

Jason (dropping in, full Red Hood mode):

WRONG BIRD, LOSER.

[Gunshots and screaming ensue.]

⸻

Tim (groaning): You didn’t have to go full John Wick.

Jason (checking him over): You’re bleeding.

Tim: It’s just a scratch.

Jason (dark glare):

I will set their van on fire.

⸻

[Later at the Batcave]

Bruce: Jason, I heard about the explosion. Was that strictly necessary?

Jason: You let the Joker live. I don’t want to hear about “necessary.”

Tim: For the record… that was awesome.

Jason: You I’ll allow to say that

[gwydre123456]

Interviewer, catching Damian in costume: Robin! Can you explain the process of picking up Robin or passing on the mantle?

Damian, mildly annoyed at Bruce at the moment: It's quite simple. Batmam steals young children from their bed, usually nine or ten or so. Then he takes you to his lair and give you a deal.

Damian: If you can beat him in a game of your choosing, he will train you to be Robin. If you lose, you are eaten. I beat him in a classic fencing game. He's quite good with swords, but he wasn't very good with the sport itself.

Tim, standing next to him: Yeah, I beat him at a memory card game. I like totally cheated, but I'm too old for him to eat now, so ot doesn't matter.

Damian, nodding: Yes. The worst part of the job is disposing of failed Robins bones. He usually sucks them clean and leaves them all over the floor.

Tim: Yeah, its messy. But after you hit, like 15 he stops trying to eat you, so that's cool.

Damian: I have not yet reached 15. I'm still in danger. If you have more questions, ask Nightwing, as he was the first to avoid being eaten.

-

Same interviewer, at a different date: Mr. Nightwing. Is it true Batman tries to eat potential Robins?

Dick, who has no idea what she's taking about: Yeah, it's really scary. His jaw unhinges like a snake.

[gwydre123456]