herbertvonkrolock

[herbertvonkrolock]

accuratE

I didn’t choose the fandom life–the fandom life seductively wrapped its cape around me and started hollering, “tAUcH miT MiIiIiiIIiIiiIIiIIiIiIIiIiiIiIiIIiIR iN diE duNKeEEeEEeeEeEeEEeEeeELLLLLHEiT EiIiIiIIiIiiIIiIiIiiIIiIIiIIiiIiiIiIIIiIIINNnNnnNNnNNnNN”

[herbertvonkrolock]

Ich bin

⚪️ hetero

⚪️ bi

⚪️ homo

⚪️ ich bin, Musik

⚪️ der Engel, nach dem du verlangst. Das Warten ist bald vorüber, denn ich lade Dich ein. Beim Ball des Jahres tanzen wir durch die Nacht, bis Deine Sehnsucht eine Frau aus Dir macht.

[herbertvonkrolock]

We don’t speak of it here

“There was a Broadway version called Dance of the Vampires, but mentioning this is a good way to get hit in the face by fans of the European version.”

— tvtropes.com, on the topic of Tanz der Vampire

[herbertvonkrolock]

YALL I WOKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, WROTE THIS IN MY NOTES, AND FELL BACK ASLEEP

[herbertvonkrolock]

I’m thirsty for mutuals so please dm me if you:

- like Cats: 1998 movie

- like Dance of the Vampires

- are a classical music stan

- are a nice person in general

- or maybe funny

- just please dm me I want some friends

[herbertvonkrolock]

Honestly, I had no idea this video exists. I’m glad it does.

(x)

[herbertvonkrolock]

Why Mozart was a f*cking badass

He wrote the 2 minute long canon called “Leck mich im arsch”, which roughly translates into “Lick My Ass” and dedicated it to the baron who refused to promote him. There is also a sequel to that song, called “Lick my ass nice and clean”

He accidentally stabbed his own thigh with a knife, but didn’t make a single sound because he didn’t want to disturb his sick wife who was sleeping next to him

He wrote his first opera at age 11 (which by itself is pretty damn impressive), and the opera was about a homosexual love triangle between a Greek god and two humans

Wrote concertos that sounded bad on purpose. He is basically the founder of Shitposting™️

Disguised himself as a regular person and went to a concert to watch an orchestra play his music. Everything went fine at first, but after the orchestra started playing one of his concertos in “D” instead of “D flat” he ran up to the stage and started screaming at them. He later got kicked out of the theatre.

Even Beethoven considered himself Mozart’s biggest fan, and said he would be one until the day he (Beethoven) dies.

Got called “Christ of Music” by Tchaikovsky

[herbertvonkrolock]

“Mozart l'Opera Rock” Mozart: Boobs and Tattoos also High Heel Schoes™, a literal slut, lots of eyeshadow, much sexy, very french

“Amadeus” Mozart: Annoying giggle, drunk 24/7, music is love music is life, stupid af, fart jokes, Daddy Issues™, Saliewho?, is literally spongebob

Canon Mozart: Angsty af, would die for the booty, ass jokes r life, has no chill, #yolo, hatefilled ball of talent, genius, better than u

[herbertvonkrolock]

My Dance of the Vampire Head-canons Pt.3 (because I don’t have a life)

- Alfred wanting to peacefully cut his hair, but Herbert appearing out of nowhere and taking the scissors away from him

- “Either you let ME cut it, or NO ONE cuts it. It already looks HORRIBLE”

- Alfred accidentally calling Count von Krolock “Dad” and proceeding to facepalm himself while walking out of the room

- Herbert and Magda being the best bros ever

- Von Krolock accidentally walking in on Herbert and Alfred dancing and screaming to “Bring Me to Life - Evanescence” and becoming genuinely scared of them

- Herbert and Alfred dancing together during a ball and Van Krolock silently watching them and smiling with pride

[herbertvonkrolock]

My Dance of the Vampires HeadCanons, pt.2 (Herbert and Alfred edition???)

- Herbert reading his poems out loud for Alfred, and Alfred falling asleep in his lap

- Herbert and Alfred going stargazing, and Alfred telling Herbert about the sun

- Herbert calling Alfred “My Sunshine” after hearing Alfred so lovingly talk about it

- Herbert trying to teach Alfred French, but giving up after Alfred accidentally starts to insult him

- Alfred begging Herbert to sing for him and Herbert being embarrassed but doing it anyway

- Herbert observing Alfred when he is reading/studying and smiling at how smart/determined/focused he is

- Herbert being proud of Alfred literally all the time.

- “ALFRED YOU ALMOST DON’T LISP ANNYMORE, I’M SO PROUD OF YOU”

- Herbert ranting about that one time when Alfred shoved THE book in his mouth, even hundreds of years later

[herbertvonkrolock]

That night, fleeing from Transylvania, Professor Abronsius never guessed he was carrying away with him the very evil he had wished to destroy. Thanks to him, this evil would at last be able to spread across the world.

The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967) dir. Roman Polanski

[herbertvonkrolock]

My Dance of the Vampires HeadCanons Pt. 1

- Alfred braiding Herbert’s hair

- Hebert wearing Alfred’s oversized sweaters as regular ones

- Herbert trying to hide his smile when Alfred looks like a mess (again)

- Krolock recommending his favorite books to Alfred, and Alfred thanking him endlessly

- Alfred desperately trying to find a book that Krolock has never read, just to be able to recommend something to him

- Krolock pretending that he has never seen the book Alfred brought to him, even though he had read it multiple times, just to see Alfred jumping around from happiness

- Professor Abronsius coming to the castle just to visit Alfred

- Abronsius and Krolock drinking tea in the library and talking about every possible scientific (and not) topic