hylian-prosecutor

[hylian-prosecutor]

i made stan get blinded by the whole community

(please credit if you use for whatever <3)

[hylian-prosecutor]

Control your fear, or they will feed on it.

[hylian-prosecutor]

what do you MEAN it isn't canon that Ford is autistic?

[hylian-prosecutor]

Lois Lowry circa 1992: so I've got this idea for a kids' chapter book

Publisher: ok cool, you've given us some good books before! what is it?

Lois: there's this dystopian society where there's no color, right?

Publisher: ok cool sounds interesting

Lois: and they euthanize weak babies and old people

Publisher: ok c- wait what

Lois: and when you hit puberty you start taking pills that curb your sexual urges

Publisher: uh.

Lois: and all of human memory is crammed into this one twelve year old's brain. the last person they did this with committed suicide

Publisher: ...

Publisher: and you said this was a children's-

Lois: did I stutter

[hylian-prosecutor]

je déteste this. why. why est-ce que you doing this à moi. maman viens de pick me up j'ai peur.

Franglish nightmare Stan Pines, inspired by this post

(bonus TikTok drawing)

[hylian-prosecutor]

NOOOOO MY BABY

[hylian-prosecutor]

"If you use em dash in your works, it makes them look AI generated. No real human uses em dash."

Imaging thinking actual human writers are Not Real because they use... professional writing in their works.

Imagine thinking millions of people who have been using em dash way before AI becomes a thing are all robots.

REBLOG IF YOU'RE A HUMAN AND YOU USE EM DASH

[hylian-prosecutor]

Control your fear, or they will feed on it.

[hylian-prosecutor]

Guys I made some art for my fanfic :)

[hylian-prosecutor]

Oh, and another more serious one that just came to me:

"So I went into Dr. Pines' class having read all these ratemyprof reviews, not sure what exactly I was getting into. At the time, I was dating this guy who was extremely toxic and controlling. Wouldn't get out of my personal space, insisted on being with me constantly, getting jealous over the smallest of things. I was on the quad one night with him, and things were quickly getting ugly, so I bolted into the nearest building, where Dr. Pines happened to be working late. I kid you not, that man dropped everything, pulled me into his office, and locked the door behind us.

He saw that I was crying and asked what I'd been running from, and when I explained it to him, he just nodded sadly and said he knew what it was like to have an abusive partner. I stayed in his office for a few hours, during which time he gave me sorely needed comfort and advice. He didn't give me many details about his own experience, but he was so kind and nonjudgmental that it didn't matter. We even played a few games of chess to help get my mind off things. Before I left, he gave me the number of a helpline and recommended a number of other resources to me. He said that if I ever needed a safe place again, his office would be open.

Say what you will about his teaching style, Dr. Pines is a guardian angel. An insane, difficult-to-understand guardian angel, but a guardian angel nonetheless. Without him I never would have found the courage to walk away from that awful relationship. I could never repay him; the best I can do is a five star review, which seems woefully inadequate. 5/5"

Hc that Ford gets a job at a local community college as a physics prof after he and Stan are done sailing around the world and fulfills his destiny as the eccentric professor he was always meant to be

And he quickly gains a reputation amongst the stem students as That Professor

I bet his ratemyprof reviews would be insane:

“He didn’t grade any of our homework until the end of the semester, but he brought something called a ‘plaidypus’ to class and let us pet it. Her name was Dorothy. 5/5”

“He constantly ranted about how ‘triangles are the most untrustworthy shape’ whatever that means. Also he doesn’t know how to use the internet. I hated his class. 5/5”

And many more iterations of “this guy is terrible. 5 stars”

[hylian-prosecutor]

"I'm autistic, and I'm fairly certain Dr. Pines is on the spectrum as well. He has such a strong special interest in fantastical creatures and conlangs and things like that that he doesn't even talk about physics, and he stims constantly. I awkwardly asked him about it one time after class, and he said something asking the lines of 'I've studied the DSM-3 extensively, and I don't think I qualify for an ASD diagnosis.' Didn't have the heart to tell him that it's been updated twice since then. I think he might have been living as a hermit for the past three decades, which is pretty relatable. 5/5"

"Why is he even a professor. Who looked at this man and thought 'Wow, he'd be great at doing mundane tasks like talking about torque and grading papers!' I want to meet whatever department head thought this was a good idea. 5/5"

"Don't be fooled by the class description. This is NOT a physics class, unless you want to try to understand stuff that's WAY beyond entry-level. I tried to tell him that this was a freshman physics class. He ignored me and started yapping about 5-dimensional space. Love his misplaced self-confidence. 5/5"

"he straight-up forgot to wear his glasses to class once. i thought maybe hed gotten contacts or something until he started squinting at his notes like he was trying to see something miles away. he still didnt realize they were missing until like halfway through class. 5/5 very entertaining"

"Never have I loved a class I was getting a failing grade in this much. 5/5"

"Dr Pines is a genius who doesn't know any normal person things. He can tell you how to permanently kill a creature with regenerative powers and knows complete sections of his own genome by heart, but he's completely clueless about any technology beyond the 1980s and still believes in medieval stuff like protective sigils and demonic possession despite being a scientist. Not sure what his deal is, but I don't question it. 5/5"

Hc that Ford gets a job at a local community college as a physics prof after he and Stan are done sailing around the world and fulfills his destiny as the eccentric professor he was always meant to be

And he quickly gains a reputation amongst the stem students as That Professor

I bet his ratemyprof reviews would be insane:

“He didn’t grade any of our homework until the end of the semester, but he brought something called a ‘plaidypus’ to class and let us pet it. Her name was Dorothy. 5/5”

“He constantly ranted about how ‘triangles are the most untrustworthy shape’ whatever that means. Also he doesn’t know how to use the internet. I hated his class. 5/5”

And many more iterations of “this guy is terrible. 5 stars”

[hylian-prosecutor]

Guys I made some art for my fanfic :)

[hylian-prosecutor]

This was all I could think of. I am very sorry

demonic possession wouldn’t even affect me, i would just assume it’s The Symptoms

[hylian-prosecutor]

Bonjour, francophones de tumblr ! je n'utilise souvent le français sur l'internet, et j'ai un question:

Avec un inconnu qu'on a rencontré en ligne, doit-on le tutoyer ou le vouvoyer ? (Est-ce qu'il y a une préférence générale, ou peut-elle changer ?)

Merci beaucoup :)

[hylian-prosecutor]

4. you are autistic (or otherwise neurodivergent) and see yourself in Ford

Wait what who said that

noticing a trend. If A. Stanley Pines B. Stanford Pines, or C. Bill Cipher are your favorite gravity falls character, you are likely

A simp

”I just think he’s neat!”

lesbian

[hylian-prosecutor]

SOMEONE HAS PUT IT INTO WORDS

Wait so are "nothing can ever be compared to anything else unless they are the exact same thing, and you should never try to liken any thing to another thing unless they are identical specimen, and do not try to categorise anything into larger major groups if there are different smaller sub groups or I will throw up" -autism and "I fucking love sorting things into arbitrary categories" -autism two different things, or is it some kind of a "it's only correct when I'm doing it" thing?