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iam50b3r · 8 months
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heyy I made a vent fic! Feel free to read it! It's really short (only 2k words) but I didn't feel like not finishing it so ye
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iam50b3r · 8 months
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I absolutely love it when you make more space on your phone but then it deletes all your docs documents :)
so uhhh, gotta start over with all of my writing.
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iam50b3r · 10 months
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i should write today… but i have like 4 fics i’m writing at the same time…
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iam50b3r · 11 months
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hananene lyric fic I'm working on
here's a snippet of what I have for a hananene lyric fic of 'liever met jou' by froukje! Hope you enjoy and I hope this gives me the motivation to finish it TT
Hanako looks outside from the bathroom window. There is a storm outside. The dark clouds infect the boy’s head mentally. He thinks about his life before he threw it away. All he wanted was to go to the moon, but he also let that go. He told himself he would never leave here. Guess he did so. Hanako’s mind wanders to all his old memories while looking through the glass at the tiny droplets fighting for a place on the window. He wonders if the droplets are mother nature’s tears or if it was just something his brother once told him to make him feel better about the weather. Thinking about it like that does make him feel better about going out in it, but he can not do that anymore. 
The boy hears a door close behind him. He looks behind him to see Nene there. The girl waves at Hanako and drops her bag next to him. “God, why does it have to rain again? I’m going to be all wet when I get home…” Nene sighs. “I guess I just have to hope that the rain stops before I leave again..” 
Hanako hums. “I… like the rain. It reminds me of living.” The boy looks back outside, then back at Nene with a grin. “Did you forget your umbrella again?” 
“I didn’t forget it!” Nene argued. “I didn’t know it was going to rain!” 
“Then check the weather before going out! You have that phone thing, you know?” 
Nene pouted and let out a huff. Then she seemed to have an idea. “Oh yeah! I heard once that if you keep looking at the rain, it’ll stop! So, Hanako, I have a very important task for you today!” 
Hanako looked at Nene with a sly grin. “I thought I was the one giving you tasks.” Nene blushed at that but kept going. 
“You’re going to look at the rain while I clean your bathroom!” 
“And why would I do that?” 
“Because you have nothing else to do and I know you’re gonna sulk anyways!” 
Hanako quickly grabbed at his uniform where his heart would be and looked sad. “Nene! To think I would do that!” 
“I know for a fact you were thinking of doing that!” Nene points at Hanako. “You’ve been way more in your head than normal and don’t you act like I haven’t noticed!” 
Hanako knows he has been thinking more about stuff. But it is not about bad stuff, not that much anymore at least. It is more about Nene. It is not going that bad, he must admit. It has not been going wrong for a while now. And even though he has been a ghost for over fifty years, it still feels like he is so new to everything. It is like everything he has learned was meant for someone else. Hanako makes a ‘pshh’ and looks back outside. He hopes he has said enough for Nene. How much he really cares about her caring. It makes him feel loved. Something he barely felt when he was alive. 
Nene lets it go with a murmur and goes to get the mop. Hanako looks back at the droplets. Why does he feel so cold? He was used to feeling a type of cold after becoming a ghost, but this was different. He wants the warmth Nene gives him. She probably does not notice it, but she gives out warmth. At least to Hanako, she does. 
The two do their own things in peace. Nene hummed some new pop song while cleaning and Hanako looked at the weather with his own head in the clouds, thinking away at the smallest things he could think about. After a while, probably 30-40 minutes later, the rain stopped. Huh, so maybe that rumor was real after all… Hanako would have to look into it so it is not some apparition that is soon going to go rogue. 
Nene laughed. “Oh my god, it worked!” She looked at Hanako with stars in her eyes. “It actually worked! Hanako-kun, you’re the best!” 
Hanako blushed slightly at the praise. He did not do anything. Or, well, anything that special. He was just looking at the rain. Nene quickly took her bag from the corner of the bathroom and ran, saying how she will have to run back home before it starts raining again and saying bye to Hanako. She also thought aloud if Kou might still be here as well, and that they could maybe walk home together. 
Hanako sighs when he knows she is gone.
“I hope you know I’d rather be with you here.” 
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iam50b3r · 11 months
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I am so lonely
I know this is not what I usually post here but I am just so lonely. I wish I had a queerplatonic relationship (QPR) with someone. It sounds so nice. Just being able to be friends but also more than that without saying it's romantic.
I am aroace. More specifically, qupioromantic asexual. I'd really just want someone I can talk to and think about as an actual partner without actually having to like,, have the romance there. Sure kisses are nice, but they're so awkward when they're romantic. I just want platonic kisses and hugs and cute little embraces on the couch man.
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iam50b3r · 11 months
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too many fics!!
I have way too many fics going on at the same time. They're all just one-shots. The one with angsty Rui is almost done but I've lost all motivation to finish it. While there's also a tbhk and now an emu fic starting to form. wish me luck
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iam50b3r · 11 months
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i am having a new hyperfixation on my hc that emu is severely depressed and suicidal but never told anyone because she wants everyone to be happy. yk, sayori style
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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I'm writing a ruikasa fic!
BIIIIGGGG TW FOR SH
I'm writing a new fic again! here's a snippet of what I've got until now. PLEASE IF YOU HAVE A TRIGGER FOR SH PLEASE DONT READ THIS
The sharp blade of a razor cuts through Rui’s skin like paper. A crimson red starts pouring out slowly at first, then fast, until it will not stop. He quickly took a bandaid from his bedside drawer with his other hand and held the freshly cut one so that no blood would spill on his sheets. The room smelled faintly of iron and blood. 
Rui does not remember when this habit became an addiction. All he remembers is that one day it started— the thoughts— the voices. They always said the same. You are a horrible person for wanting to put others’ lives in danger for your enjoyment. For your so-called ‘shows’. You are an awful person. They would torment the boy for days, maybe even years if he did not do as they wanted to. If he did not cut himself. 
Self-harm seemed to be his only way to stop the voices and feel nothing. Even if he got used to tuning out the voices, the feeling and urge were still there. The feeling of loneliness and despair. Hopelessness and hate. It never quite left unless he cut himself. And so, it became a habit, an obsession, an addiction. First, it was just when the voices got bad, but then the voices kept returning more rapidly, so it turned to three times a week, to four, to five, to every day. 
Every day Rui would make around three to maybe even ten cuts. They were never very deep, but deep enough to bleed. A lot. He made sure they only looked like cat scratches though. Just in case anyone ever asked about it. He normally wore long sleeves anyways so there was nothing very new or special about the way he dressed. And most people would not see them that way either. 
Rui has kept this a secret from everyone in WxS. The only other person who knew about it was Nene. And that was all because of an accident. 
One day when Rui was around fourteen years old, there came a very bad wave of these sorts of thoughts. He started cutting himself like always when it got that bad, but he realized he could not stop. He was screaming to himself to stop but nothing worked. Nene was walking back home from somewhere at the time and heard the screams from Rui’s open window and quickly bursted inside to see Rui on the floor, crying, with a bloody razor blade in his hands and his hands cut all the way to his armpits. Blood was everywhere. Nene ran to Rui’s side and took the razor out of Rui’s hands and went to take as many wet towels as possible. Rui barely noticed Nene there from all his panic. The girl helped Rui calm down and clean everything up. Since then they have held a promise to not tell anyone about Rui’s addiction or what happened that day. 
Nene has kept her promise for all Rui knew. But he was scared of what the others would do or say if he ever let them know. So, he made sure that when he changed to his theater, Tsukasa was nowhere to be seen. And he made sure he only cut in the night so no one would ask if there were bloodstains on his shirts. His parents also did not know about this addiction. No one had to know. It would just cause too much trouble, Rui thought. 
“RUIIIIII CMON WHAT’S THE NEXT INVENTION GONNA BE FOR THIS PLAY??” Rui got snapped out of his thoughts by a loud Emu running straight toward him. Oh yeah, he was in the middle of practice right now. He looked at Tsukasa and Nene who seemed to be talking with each other. He wonders about what they are talking about. What if it was him? What if- 
“Rui?” Emu was now an inch away from Rui’s face. Snapping her fingers by his left ear. “Are you alright?” She whispered with a worried tone. Rui gave back a sheepish smile. 
“Oh, sorry, Emu, I was just zoning out a little.” Emu seemed worried about the director’s mood, but let it go, barely. Nene and Tsukasa are now walking towards the other two, probably to make sure they are alright and to make sure they are not talking about something everyone should hear about. 
“Is everything alright?” Nene asked. She seemed to notice how Rui’s stare was slowly turning lifeless even though his Cheshire-like smile stayed on. “Uhm, we should be at page forty-six right? Where Emu says something about the lost mechanic?” 
Right. The play they were making. It was about a mechanic from a faraway kingdom. The mechanic runs away after the king demands too much of him. The king does not realize how much pressure he has put on the mechanic, and he does not seem to want to see that. Until a mermaid from the kingdom’s waters comes around to the castle with her fish apprentice to help the king find the mechanic again. The king finds out a lot more about the mechanic’s past, which seems dark and hopeless. The king realizes his mistake and makes it his goal to apologize to the mechanic. They find the mechanic in a dark cabin far away in the woods making one last invention for the king. The king apologizes and the mechanic almost does not accept it, until the mermaid told him how much the king has done to get to this place, and so they go back to the castle. Happily ever after. 
It was more on the tame side for Rui for once. He did not have to make too many robots, at least any new ones. Maybe a few, but nothing too much. Rui shook his head slightly to be able to see more than blurs. He does not quite understand why his eyesight was so bad. Maybe he should invest in glasses… 
“Rui?” The boy looked at the green-haired girl who just called him. She seemed worried. It almost looked like she could hear everything Rui was thinking about right now. It made him panic a little. And so, the voices came back. They’re all staring at you. You did something wrong. Why are you letting them see this side of you? I thought you wanted this side of you to be hidden.
“I’m sorry, I’m not feeling quite well today. Can we call this off for today?” Rui asked. He could not concentrate on all this chaos in his head today. Why was he thinking of the past so much today? He heard once that if something traumatic happened to you in your past, your body would never forget it. Maybe it was his third anniversary of the accident. 
The others seemed worried. You worried them. You are a horrible person to worry them like that. You do not deserve worry. Rui shook his head again just a little and made sure to wave at the others before going to the changing rooms. 
When Rui got to the changing room, he immediately went to his locker and tried to hold his panic at bay for just a little bit more. If Tsukasa walks in, he can not be panicking while Tsukasa is watching. That would be the worst. Rui does not quite understand why he is so worried about Tsukasa seeing him like that. More worried than if anyone else would see him like that. It was weird. 
“Rui-kun,” Rui twitched and turned around so fast he almost fell. Fuck. There he was. “Is everything okay?” He looked so worried. He hated it. Why was he so worried? He should not be worried about Rui. Rui is completely fine. He is fine. He is fine-
Rui realized his jacket was sitting on his arms, he was happy he had a blue blouse underneath. Rui did not say anything. He just ran out of the changing room. He could get his stuff he left there afterward. He just had to run away from everyone. No one was allowed to see him like this. And especially not Tsukasa. 
Tsukasa was perfect. He was so perfect there was not a single way to explain how perfect he was. Everything about him was just– perfect. Rui could not think of a single other word to describe the other boy. He does not know why or when he has gotten these thoughts in him about Tsukasa. He was just like that in his eyes. He had friends, he was popular, and he did not seem to have any sort of trouble. He had a loving sister, and a friend so close he would call him family. He seemed to have everything Rui wanted. He was just perfect. 
Rui got to his home and quickly went through the back door to his garage/bedroom. He could hear his mother upstairs in a meeting. It was not common for them to be home. It would only take a few hours before they said they would be gone for a week again. His mother is an event coordinator and his father is an international tour guide. This means they both stay out of home for days sometimes. 
He heard his phone go off in his bag but did not check it. Everything was just too much right now. He had to cut. He had to do something or he would die. Rui did not notice himself going to his bedside drawer and picking up the razor blade. He did not notice himself starting to cut into his skin. He did not notice the alarming amount of cuts he was making, or the blood coming out of them. Everything felt like a blur. 
Suddenly, a knock on his garage door snapped Rui back to reality. He saw the amount of cuts he made. Shit. Does he even have enough gauze for these? “Who is it?” His hoarse voice called out. 
“It’s Nene. Are you alright? Can I come inside?” Rui could cry right now. He did not want anyone near him right now. But he knew Nene would not judge him. So he let her in. Nene turned white the second she saw his arms. She did not say anything. She only helped him find the gauze and bandaged him properly. 
Nene stayed after that, not trusting Rui when he said he would be fine alone again. They started a game of Mario Kart and Nene went to get some leftover snacks from her house she knew her parents left her with. They were playing the game for around an hour before one spoke something again. 
“What’s been on your mind, Rui?” Nene asked. “You’ve been so… weird this entire day I’ve seen you.” 
Rui did not know what to say back. He did not know either why he was feeling so bad this day. He tried to remember the entire day. He remembers waking up. He was alright-ish then, he remembers. He took a breakfast cookie with him and the train station bento box he had bought the day prior with him before going to school. He was walking to the train station and did not seem to feel anything. At least nothing in particular that he would have to remember. He got to school and saw Tsukasa. He was talking with someone else at the school gate. Touya, he remembers. He remembers something coming up then. His heart seemed to tighten. Just remembering the scene made him want to scream all his guts out. That was it. 
“Rui?” Nene asked. Rui was blankly staring at the screen. He then looked down. Then at Nene’s legs. It was too hard to keep eye contact. 
“Something is wrong with me.” Rui started. “It seems like Tsukasa-kun has become such a big part of my life. He’s literally perfect to me. He could not do anything that would make me think otherwise. And that’s a bad thing because I know that humans can’t be perfect and that no one is perfect and-” 
“Rui,” Rui did not even realize the tears forming in his eyes. Yeah, something was definitely wrong. “Do you maybe… like Tsukasa-kun?” Rui was so confused he forgot completely what made him not want to make eye contact and saw Nene giving him a comforting smile. 
“What?” 
“You heard me,” Nene’s face became a pout, then a small laugh. “You like Tsukasa-kun. To be honest, I saw this coming a mile away.” 
Rui… liked Tsukasa? He likes Tsukasa? It would make sense. He did not want to see Tsukasa sad, he wanted what was best for Tsukasa, he also got jealous whenever someone else was talking to Tsukasa. But it could also just be friendship, right? 
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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Give me prompts for a new prsk fic!
Hello! I'm J and I make fics for prsk on ao3!
At this moment, I don't have any ideas for new fics but I really want to write after my camp is over, so I wanted to ask if anyone had any good headcanons or prompts for some oneshots I could write!
I will accept any kind of prompts except nsfw or any sort of sexual stuff. Also, any type of proship will NOT be written.
If you have any good ideas please send them to me through the q&a or just under this post! tysm!
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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GUYS!!! THE FIC IS OUT!!! GO AND READ IT IF YOU WANT IT'S ONLY 6,000 SOMETHING WORDS LONG SO IT SHOULDN'T TAKE TOO LONG!! TYSM!!!
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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guys the Saki fic is almost done! I'll leak you the title already, which is gonna be 'consequences of my actions' (like that one lovejoy lyric get it???) idk I thought it fit really well with how the fic has turned out. When I post it I hope you guys like it!
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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ao3 fic snippet
so I've been writing a new Saki Tenma-centric fic about what I would think she'd have as trauma from the hospital. Here's a small snippet of the first scenes of the fic!
Saki Tenma was not an ordinary girl, that is for sure. She was ill. That was the biggest thing you could see. Her body was weak. Never allowing her to live life like she always dreamed of doing, but to sit inside a hospital every week, getting new blood tests and medication to prevent an unknown illness from getting to her frail, weak body. 
Saki never stopped smiling though. Because she did not want her friends to think that this life she was living was hell. She never wanted them to know just how badly she wanted to be dead. Rather not live than live in her weak body. She hated it so much. Nothing could stop her from hating it. 
When she finally got out of the hospital after so many years, she noticed how alien this world became to her. Her brother was going through something, she could sense it. Her friends did not even talk with each other anymore, and everything was… different. Not at all how Saki left it. 
That was when the feeling was the worst. Saki could not sleep because of the emotion. That sick, devastating feeling of wanting to disappear. To die. To be anywhere but on Earth. Anywhere else than in her body that was slowly dying without ever getting better. She used to dream of the worlds her brother made up. Where princesses and faeries and flying horses were real and alive. Where they all lived in harmony together and everything was perfect. She dreamed of going there one day. Leaving this place behind and finally being able to rest. 
But then, things started getting better. Her old friend group became the band she is in now. Leo/Need. Her brother found a  troupe called Wonderlands x Showtime that makes shows for the nearby amusement park. Everything seemed to get better.
Everything but Saki’s health. 
Though she never stopped smiling. 
Saki was walking home from practice. Alone. She normally walks alone. Even if it is kind of depressing, she tries to see its good side and try to make everything worthwhile. But this time, she could not. All the memories of the hospital were in her head. All the tests. All the lonely nights. All of it. And she could not shake it off. 
Saki got home to an empty house. All lights were out. Everything was dark. She felt even more lonely. The blonde took off her shoes and went to her room. 
Somehow, she could feel the light in her eyes fade into nothingness. 
She felt her body go weak. Something is not right. But she could hide it. It seemed to only really come whenever she thought of the lonely times in the hospital. Or the faces of her parents. Or knowing how lonely Tsukasa must have felt in his childhood. Nothing was right. They were supposed to be happy. But she was not. 
Saki could not help but fall onto her bed and fall asleep. 
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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“Extremely detailed character sheet template”
Character Chart Character’s full name: Reason or meaning of name: Character’s nickname: Reason for nickname: Birth date: Physical appearance Age: How old does he/she appear: Weight: Height: Body build: Shape of face: Eye color: Glasses or contacts: Skin tone: Distinguishing marks: Predominant features: Hair color: Type of hair: Hairstyle: Voice: Overall attractiveness: Physical disabilities: Usual fashion of dress: Favorite outfit: Jewelry or accessories: Personality Good personality traits: Bad personality traits: Mood character is most often in: Sense of humor: Character’s greatest joy in life: Character’s greatest fear: Why? What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? Character is most at ease when: Most ill at ease when: Enraged when: Depressed or sad when: Priorities: Life philosophy: If granted one wish, it would be: Why? Character’s soft spot: Is this soft spot obvious to others? Greatest strength: Greatest vulnerability or weakness: Biggest regret: Minor regret: Biggest accomplishment: Minor accomplishment: Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about: Why? Character’s darkest secret: Does anyone else know? Goals Drives and motivations: Immediate goals: Long term goals: How the character plans to accomplish these goals: How other characters will be affected: Past Hometown: Type of childhood: Pets: First memory: Most important childhood memory: Why: Childhood hero: Dream job: Education: Religion: Finances: Present Current location: Currently living with: Pets: Religion: Occupation: Finances: Family Mother: Relationship with her: Father: Relationship with him: Siblings: Relationship with them: Spouse: Relationship with him/her: Children: Relationship with them: Other important family members: Favorites Color: Least favorite color: Music: Food: Literature: Form of entertainment: Expressions: Mode of transportation: Most prized possession: Habits Hobbies: Plays a musical instrument? Plays a sport? How he/she would spend a rainy day: Spending habits: Smokes: Drinks: Other drugs: What does he/she do too much of? What does he/she do too little of? Extremely skilled at: Extremely unskilled at: Nervous tics: Usual body posture: Mannerisms: Peculiarities: Traits Optimist or pessimist? Introvert or extrovert? Daredevil or cautious? Logical or emotional? Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat? Prefers working or relaxing? Confident or unsure of himself/herself? Animal lover? Self-perception How he/she feels about himself/herself: One word the character would use to describe self: One paragraph description of how the character would describe self: What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? How does the character think others perceive him/her: What would the character most like to change about himself/herself: Relationships with others Opinion of other people in general: Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others? Person character most hates: Best friend(s): Love interest(s): Person character goes to for advice: Person character feels responsible for or takes care of: Person character feels shy or awkward around: Person character openly admires: Person character secretly admires: Most important person in character’s life before story starts: After story starts:
found here
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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🪐 orbital resonance 🪐
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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how to sew a sailor uniform : part 1, sewing the top
*IMPORTANT* If you got here from Google, thanks for reading! I hope this tutorial helps you. If you have any questions regarding this tutorial, please read my FAQ page first before sending me any questions. Half the time you’ll find the answer to your question faster than if you wait for my response. Thanks!
>> MATERIALS GUIDE <<
BONUS POST: How to draft the collar/facing
Hi! Some lovely anons asked me how I make my sailor uniforms for my DR costumes, so I decided to finally make a post about it! For reference, I use patterns from two Japanese sewing books: Cosmode's 仮想衣装 and すぐに作れるcos衣装. The latter has a fitted seifuku pattern that I use for all of my Danganronpa costumes in order to achieve the flared effect around the hips! I pattern my own pleated skirts, which I’ll explain in the next post.
!IMPORTANT! Before you ask me where to buy these books, read this post about Japanese patterns! They’re not beginner friendly at all and I can’t recommend them to anyone who isn’t reasonably advanced at sewing, so buy at your own risk!
I can’t promise I’ll be able to explain everything relevant since I’m assuming basic sewing and pattern knowledge in order to keep this as brief as possible, so please send me an ask if you have any further questions! If you have any character-specific questions, feel free to send me an ask as well!
Also, as a fair warning, I use a fair amount of tools that people might not have on hand, such as a rotary cutter. I include suggestions on how to get the same outcome without those tools, but I can’t promise it’ll be as neat or look the same. 
how to sew a sailor uniform top with a side zipper
Keep reading
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iam50b3r · 1 year
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Sunny through the years…
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iam50b3r · 2 years
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Happy anniversary.
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