incorrect-shoujisquad
incorrect-shoujisquad
Jheiyn
32 posts
jjk blog -> @/incorrect-jujutsu ☆ yall should follow me i literally update once every thirty-seven business days ☆ (☆icon by @natchoarts_ on insta☆)
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 5 months ago
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mha as things i've overheard in high school 11 (sorry for the hiatus i hate junior year <3)
kaminari: why do you have a bottle of ice water? it's cold
sero: because my throat hurts
mina: but it's like 40 something degrees
sero: okay but my throat hurts
kirishima: but it's cold out
sero: that doesn't change the fact that my throat hurts
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koda: what would you do without me
shoji: probably end up in the hospital
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iida: i'm quitting journalism no one in this fucking classroom knows how to spell
iida: who the fuck capitalises 'and'
iida: wait til i And my foot off in your ass
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bakugo: i don't beat children
midoriya: good
bakugo: however
midoriya: WHAT
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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class 1-a as reasons my brother has called my dad (yes i know shinsou isnt in 1-a but i ignore it)
bakugou - slammed the dishwasher door too hard (yknow like an idiot) and got it stuck
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ojirou - threw a ball. there's a hole in the wall now
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aoyama - spilled a coffee in the car and some of it got into the aircon
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hagakure - broke a hairbrush
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satou - set a pan on fire
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kaminari - chicken.
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shinsou - the water in his house was acting fucky and it turned brown for some reason
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midoriya - got bit by a dog because he tried to pet it
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sero - made food for someone and left for three days. the food was still there when he returned. he was pissed
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mina - dropped a clear glass plate and was too scared to walk in the kitchen
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jirou - got distracted and the sink overflowed
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iida - had the intrusive thought to use a knife instead of a dart. this did not end necessarily well
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yaoyorozu - the book she was reading was so sad she had to share her sorrow with someone else
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kirishima - broke the fucking microwave
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tokoyami - swore on everything he saw a ghost in his window (he hadn't slept correctly in a week)
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uraraka - broke her favourite potted plant while trying to move it outside
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todoroki - forgot the password to his laptop
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kouda - saw a box of cats on the street and sobbed
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tsuyu - refused to enter the house because there was a roach on the door
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shouji - woke up not knowing what day it was and swore it was wednesday, despite his phone saying it was thursday
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things i've overheard in high-school 10 cus it's almost fucking over
uraraka: iida, most romantic way to tell your significant other youre pregnant?
iida, no hesitation: ak-47
midoriya: WHAT
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shouji: that is an ugly ass baby
shouji: i mean what
tokoyami: shouji...
shouji: who said that bro you cant talk about a child like that
ojirou: he says after talking about a child like that
shouji: SHUT UP
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kirishima: i mean i swallowed a dime once
sero: i swallowed a penny
kaminari: weak asses i swallowed a quarter
bakugou: why the fuck are yall swallowing money
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aizawa: im about to quit
snipe: its almost the end of the year you can do this
aizawa: no its fine i can just jump out the window
ashido: MR AIZAWA?
aizawa: oh i didnt realise you guys were listening
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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aizawa as my mom's random outbursts
aizawa: up your fucking ass thats what
shinsou: woAh
aizawa: OH HITOSHI HELLO
shinsou: HI?
aizawa: I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE HOME HI BABY
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eri: daddy shinsou hit me
shinsou, who hasnt moved for the past 20 minutes: HUH?
aizawa: *puts eri in a blanket*
shinsou: UHM??
aizawa: *picks her up and throws her on the beanbag*
aizawa: lets see hitoshi hit that
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aizawa: oh shit i just ran like three red lights thats probably not good
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aizawa: uh oh here comes some jackoff subaru tryna cut me off
hizashi: please dont rear-end them i still havent recovered from the last time you rear-ended a dumb driver
the rest of the ua staff in the back of the car:
snipe: time for me to get out the car
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aizawa: what the fuck is he doing
hizashi: its a random crackhead only god knows what
aizawa: itd be real damn funny if he ran into the road
shinsou: daddy STOP
eri: yeah thats not nice!
aizawa: well his face aint nice but i still have to look at it
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aizawa, reading the name of nemuris rice cooker: cuckoo...
nemuri: whats wrong with it >:(
aizawa, just randomly(?): CACAW
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things ive overheard in high-school 9
all might: alright kiddos we doing dodge ball today so if you got glasses on then you best take em off
iida, throwing his glasses off: fuck it we ball
midoriya: dont hit all might now
iida: if i mistake him for a student cus i cant see then thats his fault
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kirishima: you are the reason we shouldnt be allowed to have art classes
kaminari, drawing a scarily realistic dick: literally what are you talking about
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*during theater club*
shouji: so i just fall
tokoyami: yeah but be dramatic with it
shouji: aight
shouji: *death drops*
kouda: :o
yaoyorozu: OH THATS NOT-
tokoyami: no no let him cook
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my friend benji says
mineta: hey bakugou
bakugou: ew disgusting
mineta: whats disgusting is your attitude
bakugou: i hate that kid
bakugou: step on a landmine
iida: NO
bakugou: tell him to fall on a splitter
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ojirou: you guys are cancer
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sero: i dont know how to spell seemteegnces
sero: sentremces
shouji: i can see this
sero: senteexnces
sero: senteneeenvces
sero: jeezus
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aizawa: she accidentally kicked a baby
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masterlist i almost forgot
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my family has said 6
*playing bitlife*
shouji: nah how are you broke ugly and dumb my guy
ojirou: pick a fuckin struggle
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bakugou: *sets his phone down and walks out of the room*
midoriya: kacchan what are you–?
bakugou: *runs back into the room full speed and jump kicks his phone*
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ojirou: beat his ass
shouji: gonna uppercut him in his dick watch this
*literally kills the guy*
ojirou: :O
shouji: THATS THE SECOND MURDER AND IM ONLY TEN WHAT THE FUCK
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yaoyorozu: glitter everywhere omg
iida: youll be finding that ish in your carpet for years
yaoyorozu: FUCKKKKKK
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dabi: i got into a fight
spinner: and you won?
dabi: do i look like i LOST
spinner: NO THATS WHY I FUCKING ASKED
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my friends on discord have said 5 but its purely sero misspelling everything
shouji: i would use my main acc but im feeling homophobic today
sero: ANGELO?
sero: STOP THIS
sero: HELP*
uraraka: THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HELP??
sero: SHUT UP
shouji: angelo!!!
sero: BRO 😭
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sero: no ome lmows wnay i wanna say and i dont eother soni have to keep finding ways to sau it LPKE IDK
sero: mhm
todoroki: and you wonder why people dont know what youre trying to say
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ojirou: guys please i need to be publicly executed
sero: omg no youre so eeecy sodnt leyx soemhfe ecevhte you 🥺
kaminari: HELP?
sero: howfid i fuck up thay bas
kirishima: its ok bae try again
sero: i MEANT omg no youre so sexy dont let someone execute you 🥺
ojirou: ok that makes sense
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kirishima: do you guys chew jolly ranchers
sero: if yoo chee kolly rancher is dll perspnally dtsg you o hell
bakugou: iida translate
sero: STOPR
iida: "if you chew jolly ranchers i will personally drag you to hell"
sero: HOWD DONYOU DOT HAY
iida: said it once, i will say it again, i speak illiteracy
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masterlist <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my friends have said
dabi: you are so astronomically boring that i could watch paint dry and be more entertained
shigaraki:
dabi: if someone shot me right now i would thank them cus then i wouldnt have to talk to you
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shouji, on the phone: well i dunno maybe if you werent built like an improper fraction we wouldnt be here
shouji: >:O
shouji: NO IM NOT CALLING YOU FAT IM CALLING YOU UGLY HAVE SOME CLASS
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mic: oh my god im gonna have a stroke
aizawa: whats wrong?
mic: what is the word where you have an idea but then you dont
sir nighteye: you forgot?
mic: NO like you previously had one
aizawa: what 💀
edgeshot: what does that mean 😭
mic: LIKE YOU WERE THINKING
midnight: and??
mic: I DONT KNOW LIKE I PREVIOUSLY WAS THINKING
sir nighteye: YOU MEAN YOU THOUGHT?
mic: if i was in front of you rn i would propose to you YES THANK YOU
hawks: WHY DID YOU DESCRIBE IT SO HORRIBLY
mic: IDK OK IM FUCKING STUPID
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masterlist
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my friends said on discord 4
shouji: HELPPPP
shouji: WHO HAS THE TIME TO JUST WALK ILLEGALLY GIRL I WILL HIT YOU LIKE GO SOMEWHERE
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kouda: so 7x8 is–
kouda: 😗
kouda: i think i'll kill myself.
ojirou: THE WAY I FUCKING SCREAMED
tokoyami: STOP THIS IMMEDIATELY 😭
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midoriya: back to the original question: why your feet?
shouji: my medical teacher says your feet! why would you land on your fucking side
todoroki: SO I CAN WALK WHEN I LEAVE THE HOSPITAL
shouji: HEIFER YOU WILL NOT BE LEAVING THE HOSPITAL CUS YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS WILL BE FUCKED THE FUCK UP. YOU WILL DIE.
todoroki: AT LEAST I STILL GOT MY LEGS
shouji: AT LEAST I STILL GOT MY ORGANS
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shinsou: KAMINARI FUCKING DENKI. DM ME AMONG US ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL SKIN YOU ALIVE
kirishima: oh 😰
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bakugou: me personally, people shorter than me don't exist
uraraka: oh im sorry let me just vanish from existence rq 💔
tokoyami: my fault, dawg, lemme get thanos snapped, hollup 🥺
tsuyu: my bad let me go fall off the face of the earth for you 🖕😀
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masterlist mhm
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things ive overheard in high-school uhhhh 8 i think because its my first day back
kirishima: my music stopped for two seconds and i hear "the autistics should do track cus they always be running"
mina: 24 years jail time to whoever said that
kaminari: no parole
sero: electric chair bro
bakugou: fire squad even
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shouji: SATOU BRO MOVE YOUR BLACK ASS FROM UP OFF MY CAR I AM TRYING TO REVERSE
satou: TAKE YOUR BLACK ASS AND DRIVE OFF THE SIDEWALK
shouji: NO THERES PEDESTRIANS NOW MOVE
satou: THEN WHAT AM I?
shouji: A BRICK WALL NOW MOVE
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aoyama: damn ojirou i aint seen you since last year
ojirou:
ojirou: please never talk to me again
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todoroki: *hits his head on the desk*
shinsou: damn
todoroki: what the fuck happened to "are you okay"
shinsou: it died with my patience over break
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masterlist woo hoo
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my family said 5 because im still stuck with them for two days
shinsou: its too early to be going down the damn stairs
present mic: youre telling me! i walked down five steps and my knees started buckling
aizawa: i walked down one and started having contractions
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shouji: *shuts the door in tokoyami's face*
tokoyami: >:O
jirou: THAT BITCH
tokoyami: hOw- how dare thee
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bakugou: *pushes midoriya*
midoriya: RUDE WTF WHAT DID I DO TO YOU TODAY
sero: damn today?
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todoroki: all these fucking mobs like suck my cock at that point
iida: TODOROKI
todoroki: acting like you dont say the most diabolical bullshit when you think no one is around
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masterlist go crazy yall
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my family said 4 cus theyre so ridiculously stupid (i love them)
shinsou: MY CAT IS DISCOMBOBULATED
aizawa: HUH?
shinsou: *holding up a squishie cat* HES FUCKED UP
aizawa: i thought you meant the actual cat YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME DAMN IT
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iida: are you making a sandwich at 2 in the morning
todoroki: are you judging me for making a sandwich at 2 in the morning
iida: maybe i am
todoroki: maybe i am
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sero: *pushing mina off the bed* fall off the bed bro
mina: *actually falls* FUCK
sero: HAHAHA FUCKING LOSER
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tokoyami: i firmly believe putting a rainbow at the end of any phrase makes it funnier
satou: i have cancer 🌈
ojirou: i hope you choke 🌈
shouji: my goldfish just died 🌈
kouda: i have crippling depression 🌈
ojirou: oh 😰
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masterlist oh yeah
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as random quotes from my friends
shinsou: follow your dreams type shit
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mina: babe what the balls are you on about
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*in the midst of a girls vs boys debate*
iida: what about the non-binaries
shouji: LEAVE US OUT OF YOUR SHIT
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jirou: dont you worry us women will remember this
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kaminari: smash next question
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midoriya: i forgot mineta was a person
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bakugou: YOUR FLAT BACKED ASS KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT
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uraraka: i bet bakugous weave thats true
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masterlist link yall <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my family said 3 cus im stuck with them for another week
kaminari: thats why you look like a monkey
bakugou: ok i see how it is
*literally a minute later*
bakugou, now sitting on kaminari's back: dont start no battles you cant win now
bakugou: this is what happens when you make stupid ass decisions
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shinsou: god damn why is it so hot in this bathroom
todoroki: because iida likes to shower in a fucking volcano
iida: says the bitch that showers in the artic
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shouji: ojirou bro you and these fucking christmas ornaments
ojirou: theyre pretty ok
shouji: put these heifers to rest you have like 1000 of them
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uraraka: MOMO IM SORRY
yaoyorozu: why? whats wrong?
uraraka: I SPILLED YOUR TEA ON MY DRESS
yaoyorozu: FUCK MY TEA ARE YOU OK?
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masterlist that i constantly forget to link <3
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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mha as things my family has said 2 (merry christmas and happy holiday :D)
bakugou: bro grab that doll by her two fucking pigtails and thundercunt her to another universe it is not that hard
kaminari: but she always comes back
sero: OK WILLIAM AFTON she wouldnt come back if you ROCKED HER SHIT
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shouji: touch kouda's bunny and i will personally break your fingers backwards you gonna be typing backwards today
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aizawa: *picks something up*
aizawa: what the fuck is this
mina: oh i–
aizawa: nevermind i dont care
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midoriya: damn my back hurts
shinsou: let me help you
midoriya:
midoriya: okay
shinsou: *kicks midoriya in the back*
midoriya: OW YOU SONAVA BITCH
shinsou, calmly: how do you feel
midoriya: LIKE KILLING YOUR ASS
shinsou: NO YOUR BACK YA ASSHOLE
midoriya: oh
midoriya: i am in severe pain
shinsou: *clicks his tongue* damn
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incorrect-shoujisquad · 1 year ago
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satou and shouji as me and my brother baking brownies (send help <3)
satou: shouji, dont—
shouji: *eating the batter*
satou:
satou: motherfucker
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shouji: move your big fucking head i cant see the box
satou: how dare you talk to me like that
shouji: sorry my bad
shouji: might i politely ask you to move your ginormous ass fucking head so i can see the box pretty please with a cherry on top
satou: not what i meant, but you were polite, so ill take it
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kouda: what is burning in here
satou: my hopes and dreams
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satou: TURN THE FUCKING OVEN ON
shouji: BITCH, YOUR MOTHER
satou: WHAT— WHAT AM I TO MAKE OF THAT
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