its-just-a-hug

[its-just-a-hug]

"I wanted to disappear.

But on my way here I felt good.

I thought "Why did I bring tangerines?"

But the tangerine was sweet.

I thought "Why did I wear ill-fitting shoes?"

But it felt great taking them off.

The bathroom was large.

I was sitting, and now I'm laying down."

Lost, 인간실격 (2021)

[its-just-a-hug]

[its-just-a-hug]

I used to write poems.

Sad ones.

Sweet ones.

Curious ones.

And ones full of love.

But nights got colder.

Words less expressive.

And my mind more tired.

I kinda miss

the artist in me.

🥀

[its-just-a-hug]

Waiting for someone who’s chaos matches mine, and who’s presence is as peaceful as my solitude.

[its-just-a-hug]

I love that feeling when you're standing on a hill under cloudy sky.

Cold wind swirling your hair around.

Tired body charges this gray-blue energy and all you want to do is scream on top of your lungs.

Wish this moment was longer.

This feeling reminds me of what it feels like to be alive.

I'm alive.

✨☁️

[its-just-a-hug]

I wonder how you feel when you see my message.

Do you feel the same happiness as I do?

🦋✨

[its-just-a-hug]

I wonder how many people I've hurt during my life.

And does hurting them make me a bad person? Or rather the unawareness of hurting them?

I wonder...

[its-just-a-hug]

I wash my hair once a week, that's what curly hair prefer.

But time flies so fast that it feels like I'm washing it every other day.

...

[its-just-a-hug]

In my opinion, love is the most beautiful thing we can give. And loving someone is the most beautiful thing we can have.

When you love someone for simply the person they are.

When you wish only the best for them without expecting anything back from them.

When you are able to love them without losing yourself.

You are yourself. You are complete. They are themselves. They are complete as well. You don't need them to complete you.

You simply love them and that is the most beautiful feeling you can experience - love.

I'm very grateful for being able to love in such way.

🦋🧡

[its-just-a-hug]

You know it's really bad when you get to the point where you start crying because of the smallest and most insignificant fails...

...like dropping a paper.

____________________________

[its-just-a-hug]

✨🦋

[its-just-a-hug]

Maybe I'm too much of a people pleaser.

Someone texts me asking or needing something and there I'm putting everything else away just to be there for them immediately.

I should stop.

You! Stop it!

[its-just-a-hug]

Today I gave up, once again, on studying. Not having time for mental-health self-care during work time takes its price.

I wonder how bad the exam result will be.

And I wonder why I still keep going on like this, I think I'm actually pretty dumb.

...

[its-just-a-hug]

It's just a hug.

For someone it's a whole world spinning. For someone it's a warm feeling. For someone it's the biggest gift. For someone else it's all that matters.

And I think that's really beautiful.

...

[its-just-a-hug]

At times I wonder if my personality is interesting enough and good enough for you.

Or am I just nothing more than a body?

🦋✨

[its-just-a-hug]

Many of the songs on my playlist are there only because there's a choreography for them in my head. 🎧🎵