jellynyann

[jellynyann]

"It doesn’t matter what he told you. You never scared me"

Beastxcanon

[jellynyann]

itsandiniria on tiktok

link back to this post if using!

[jellynyann]

I kinda became a viral/meme in my country on the right wing side of the internet. I hate that so much. I don't know what to do...

[jellynyann]

Me 12 yo: I'll make those ancient OCs lolis and shotas because it's cool and one of them would be a crossdresser, shota that looks like a loli, and when he will first meet the protagonist he will say that he's a boy because he was misgendered or whatever and will flash his panties to the protagonist because ✨shotacon fanservice✨ I love shotas!!

Me 21 yo: I still love lolis and shotas and I still want to keep most of the OCs that are ancient lolis and shotas but. Now it's not socially acceptable in fandom spaces to be a kodocon. If I publish it one day, what if people will accuse be of being a lolicon/shotacon and I'll be canceled idk, I want lolisho fanservice but I'm scared of antis ;__;

[jellynyann]

Some guy on a pride parade made an interview with me, I didn't know he's right wing and now I regret it because I ended up on Twitter and there are hundreds of hateful comments... And the irony is that it is so similar to what I hear about my people on the internet. By other LGBT people. Because of being civil about shipping. Like, the arguments and the reason of the hate is different but the attitude, aggressiveness and things they say are somehow similar. Go to the psychiatrist, go to the therapy, you're mentally ill, you're subhuman, if I had two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Stalin and the they I would shoot 2 bullets to the they, saying that I'll become a zoophile. The hatred on the internet is so similar even if it's about different things. And I can't understand why people are like that about people who don't hurt anyone..... And then I'll go to the community of young LGBT people and they'll say that they would shoot me too, that I'm jobless and should go to the psychiatrist (which is ableist), that I'll become/I am a pedophile (they meaning children rapist), and stuff. It's just so sad. Also I wish I could just live peacefully...

[jellynyann]

What is your AO3??

I am determined to bring more top Akutagawa x bottom Dazai fics into the world

[jellynyann]

For me it was:

Proship is the default so I'm proship by definition too -> DNI culture is born and suddenly I start seeing "proship DNI" -> After some time of seeing the word proship in DNIs and people complaining and hating these people I look for what the word means. I learn the definition. "Wait, what? But it has always been the default??? What changed???" Confused as fuck -> "I have to pretend that it's not like I don't care what other ships because that's apparently problematic?? Okay......" -> "Everyone hates proshippers, what if they are right tho? But how is not hating others for shipping bad. People have always shipped weird things in fandoms. Shit, what if they ARE right tho? And I am like those old people who are like 'in my times people were beating kids and nobody had a problem with that so beating kids is ok'?? What if I am the bad person??" (Moral OCD kicks in) -> Still doesn't hate people for what they ship but sometimes feels guilty about being proship by definition -> Moral OCD and fear of being hated and harassed is building up -> Sometimes starts pretending to be an anti so the people around me won't turn against me (not by harassing people tho) -> Starts being more and more fed up with the antis -> Feels lonely that I can't be honest with my friends about my certain views/ships -> Decides to start being active in the proship community and make accounts where I'm openly proship -> Mental health improves, I found like minded people -> Starts to distance yourself from antishippers

did anybody else go through the "unaware of pro/anti discourse -> hypocritical/guilty anti (secretly read incest noncon ao3 fics) -> "you can ship toxic/dark ships as long as you dont romanticize them" -> proship but anti lolisho -> pro ship pro para shotacon" pipeline

[jellynyann]

Art trade with Jinx_09 on twitter, see the wonderful piece they made for me here -> Magical girl aku from wan

[jellynyann]

was so devastated yesterday that I had to color and reorganize this all

[jellynyann]

The fandom culture people want back so badly pisses me off bc it’s always antis saying it

Proship/fic is fandom culture!!!! Block and ignore things you don’t like, don’t harass people

Dark/comships is fandom culture!!!! Stuff like bipper and shit like that was peak back then!!

Nsfw is fandom culture!!!! Nsfw has been a huge thing, it’s never going away no matter how much you “cancel” the artist for drawing two fictional characters fucking!!!

You don’t want the fandom culture you think you want bc it’s “wrong”! You want the fandom you have now mixed with the childhood you grew up with!! >_>

[jellynyann]

"Tcoaal would be good if Ashley and Andrew weren't siblings!" congrats, you missed the entire fucking point off the game.

There would be no story if they weren't siblings, what is so difficult to understand that.

They have that relationship BECAUSE Andrew had to raise Ashley because their parents weren't doing it. If they were just friends, no events in the game would happen.

Man y'all can't read a story properly.

[jellynyann]

No, Leyley Was Not Evil, She Was Just a Kid

I was going to be like "If you thought Leyley was an irredeemable devil as a child you probably just hate kids" but I'll be a little more lenient and say you probably either never interacted a lot with kids nor have had to work with kids. Fair enough. But like you're still wrong and I'm going to explain why.

The first part of Decay was an hourlong flashback showing why Andrew hates Leyley, and as a child how easy it was to view her as the evil thing that's ruining his life. And don't get me wrong, Leyley was an absolute brat. She's rude, she's pushy, she throws tantrums, she has no filter, and she has no qualms breaking things.

But from an outside perspective, especially from someone who's worked with kids like this? She's just being a normal kid. None of this surprises or disturbs me. Her attitude and actions made perfect sense. Like yeah when kids are left to their own devices and made to watch each other, when all the adults in their lives want nothing to do with them, this is going to be the result.

If you don't give them the attention they need and the only way they get it is to break things, they are going to break things. And because Andy initially only bothered with Leyley when she breaks things, she learned this is the only way to get and keep his attention.

And this mindset that Andrew will only give her attention when she breaks things is why she continuously pushes Andrew's buttons present day. She never grew out of this belief, which is why it's hard for her to grow out of Leyley.

And reminder, the reason this happened is due to the parents. This was not Leyley's fault, it was the parents who pushed Leyley onto Andy. And I also don't blame Andy for not understanding that as a kid. Later as an adult Andrew does realize that it was his mom who caused this to happen, but it doesn't remove the resentment he festered for Leyley for so long.

On another note I think it was nice how despite this burden put on Andy that made it hard to like Leyley, there's still glimpses of them getting along. Andy defending Leyley from the teacher, them chatting and laughing about getting baked into one of grandma's pies. It really showed that in spite of everything they could have gotten along as normal siblings would, if only things hadn't been screwed up from the start.

It also shows that despite hating Leyley, Andy was still only ever happy with her in the flashback. During that whole sequence not once was he happy interacting with anyone except those few times with Leyley. The only times he acted happy with anyone else was because it was just that: an act to avoid discomfort or trouble.

When the main source of your misery is also the main source of your happiness...yeah no wonder things went so bad.

[jellynyann]

Sorry I feel like I've been talking about this a lot in bits but I feel like Atsushi is truly the perfect person for Akutagawa because of his endless patience– at least as far as I like to characterize him in the sskk picture. By that I don't mean he won't get frustrated and fed up with Akutagawa's antics, or that he doesn't end up fighting with him - because he will, and he does. What I mean is that no matter how many times they have harsh fights and dramatic fall outs, he will always come back. Maybe rather than endless patience, it's more proper to describe it as an unbreakable willingness to forgive. I feel like it's a lot like his regenerative abilities: no matter how many times Akutagawa hurts him and cuts his limbs, they'll never stop growing back. And that's exactly what Akutagawa needs, and no one else could be as perfect for him as Atsushi is, because… Akutagawa will keep hurting Atsushi. I'm sorry. It's not a matter of not loving him, because he does love him, endlessly; it's just his nature, his tendency to cause pain, his self-destructive instinct that will have him act like he wants to be hated. And Atsushi is the only person able to love him despite.

[jellynyann]

We have the exact same eye color as Kunikida, we're blonde and recently we cut out hair in similar way to him so if we tie it it would look similar and we have a Kunikida introject that is recently more and more active.... Should we buy Kunikida cosplay at this point?? XD No but really. We also wear glasses since recently but they are round and different than his unfortunately 😭 And we have a babyface tho XD

[jellynyann]

A few simple blinkies at your disposal!

[jellynyann]

so tender, so vulnerable, so painful

[jellynyann]

Being a bsd fan is wild rn. Like yeah, the tiger bookmark in the fourth dimension realized he wasn't hallucinating his current mentor, just the guy who abused him, and is finally telling him off as they work together to push a door open. The guy who looked like a vampire turned vampire turned knight-vampire realized that he cares for the tiger bookmark, watched as he was turned to bubbles by a god with a mask and a fidget spinner, realized he may be in love, and is now fighting for him. Also like he used to want to kill him but now they die for each other but it's like totally platonic don't worry. And we've never been better