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Tools of Change

Just off a call from a close friend who is in Tasmania a young person studying para medicine and such a delightful call sharing the updates on creating a Manifestation Wheel taught to her by Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha.

 When it comes to breaking the habit of being yourself, particularly when you’re in the same environment and have associative memories with all that’s going on around, tools are so helpful.

 As Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha often reminds us, “Knowing yourself is true wisdom.”

In this case the Manifestation Wheel was used to write and feel how each day is. Written in present tense it includes having the courage to speak up when things can be done/said better, being delighted by the day and had a description of the waking up, described in detail, how the alarm goes off and the room, and the feelings, the attitude towards the lectures (same room the same lectures) and responding differently from a new view point – this is how is the chemistry differently.

 Creating a new version of you included that awareness to have the courage to look to see what would be different in oneself what is to let go off. The simple one I’ve been looking at today and the last week is stopping the chemical release of adrenaline and fear about imagined sharks when swimming in deep water or off the side of a boat. Coming from Australia knowing there are some shark attacks, not many though, I have had a fear of ‘sharks’ more a fear of the unknown - if there’s something that can’t be seen then it may be harmful – an imagined shadow, a re-run of some suspense film section of You-tube!

 Now currently in Aqua blue to turquoise crystal clear water in Turkey where even if there is a shark, it’s a foot or less long and not interested in me. So, a great place to work on the catching the first thought:

 “I wonder what is over there, or under me, or … I feel the chemistry want to dash and swim fast to the ladder, sometimes I do!  Then where there I stay hanging on the edge – stop that chemistry, breath and push slowly back off the ladder back into the blue.  My mask looking down there is blue on blue – so many little particles that the light is scattered. Not so clear here – but sooo blue.  Light dances seemingly up from the unseen bottom.  The words rise again: I’m out here in a big space by myself quickly swim back to the ladder and get on the yacht”. Stopping these imaginings of an undesirable world and internal chemistry.  Living according to my biochemistry so that which I imagine is as powerful as that which I experience. So why not imagine (and in this case match it to the reality here) of swimming in turquoise blue warm water with the dancing of the light as I look through the mask and snorkel.  Breath, breath. Long exhale – beautiful.

 “What we seek we find. In our thinking we can validate anything to make us right, we alone determine that.” -Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha

 When we can find one of these very tangible experiences (an anxiety arising from a known set of triggers) it can be a good one to work with. Changing thoughts and thus feelings can be like moving the flow of water from one creek line but it is engraved to another it takes first the observing that there is something to change. The courage to change it. Knowing what it looks like when different, what that can look like, feel like, taste like.

 Implementing the tools that enable the halting of that thought feeling sequence move to the new one that you’re creating.  Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha reminds us, “When you can be with yourself and go deep within, you can find all of the answers you need. Take time for yourself to get out of the craziness of the world and get into the realness of yourself.”

 The conversation with the person in Tasmania was also around housewarming gift of ceramic plates that she had given to someone recently.  The recipient, a young fellow and first share house renting, said all they’re so good I’ll use them for special occasions.  Another of their friends echoed this concept of putting things away.  Then there was also the view point if the sun has arisen that day this is a very good occasion. Knowing that every day is full life as shared by Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha.  Every day we can start with new foundations and a new operating system re-creating the best of You – who you really are before the layers were added, for the ways of being the best version of You.

 Geraldene Dalby-Ball

Elaway De’Ye’Ng Li’ta

   Originally published on JMWriters Blog. Re-published by permission.

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Love Defined

Primarily we define the discipline word in the meaning of human spiritual progress. Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor says, “You’re always one decision away from a totally different life.”

This portion will observe which things make discipline, what provides the reason and what aims for a domain. I consider it in the meaning of love. I am very aware from the point that perceiving the love is same as briefing the mystery. We are going to discover the most mysterious entity and most untold thing. The structure of words cannot get the deepness and widens of love because love has no limitation. I believe in the worth of this word, love. That is why I am trying to write about love with my specific knowledge. However, I know this trial will be some ways, insufficient.

From my point of view, no one gave an adequate and well-explained definition of love in this world. There are various categories of love that can fall like agape, eros, philia, imperfect love, perfect love, etc. I know that a single definition of love is insufficient; however, I define love. I express love in this way. The will to extend oneself to nurture one's own or another's spiritual growth. 

After years of enjoying conversing with partners earlier, during and after marriage and chatting with guardians and kids combating their connections, I was persuaded of the bias of the definition. Love should see not as a preference but rather as an empowered preference. To love is to feel and behave affectionately. 

Many females have told, hurts apparently on their impressions, that the husbands who struck them love them. Since they see love as an inclination, the word conceals reality: you don't adore somebody you repeatedly beat and misuse. You might have exceptionally overwhelming preferences toward them, you might even accept you can't survive without them, yet you don't adore them.

The primary love referenced in the Bible isn't true love but parental love. When a youngster is conceived, and parent's response to this individual, who so as of late didn't exist, is to feel that "I would do anything for her."  For that reason, we frequently hear the expression "you don't carry on as you love me." We know in our bones that passion isn't an inclination alone yet a preference that pours into the world in real life.

Between people, love is a jovial word. Indeed, you can treasure things that don't adore you back-the sky or a cliff or a creative design. There is a unique and a favorite you don't simply adore, yet you love somebody. Furthermore, true love isn't just about the sensations of the sweetheart; it isn't egotism. It is when one person puts cache in someone else and shows it. Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor shares, “it is growing increasingly important that we know the difference between what comes from the outside and what stirs within.” 

Recreating a wide range of responsibilities for somebody and feeling hardly anything for them is possible. Love isn't tied in with being recruited for help. Love isn't a pledge finished with an incredible soul. Yet, nor is it an energy that communicates thoughts in savagery, or one that doesn't express itself thoughts by any norms. The bias should be married to the deed. “Live it on your terms not on the doubts and weaknesses,” challenges Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor. “You are what you believe.” 

We would have a better origination of love if we comprehended that affection, such as enabling, is a propensity that communicates thoughts in real life. What we feel is mirrored in what we do. The artist's tune is pretty, and the energy firm, yet the most profound excellence of love is how it alters lives.

 How does love change over a long time?

Study carrying changes in sincere love over the long run views that as enthusiastic love begins high, it falls throughout a relationship.

There are different purposes behind this. As abettors look further into one another and become surer about the drawn-out eventual destiny of the relationship, plans create. The excellent chances to encounter inquisitiveness and energy can fall, as can the repetition of sexual action. This can make active love break down.

Although a decrease in enthusiastic love isn't possible for all couples, different reviews apprise that around 20-40% of couples experience this slump. The abruptest recession will probably happen throughout the next ten years of partners who have been connected for more than a decade.

Life experiences and advances can make it trying to encounter vigor. Individuals have contending liabilities that influence their power and decrease the chances of acquiring enthusiasm. Life as a parent is an example of this.

We do not need to show love. We select love. If we think we are in love, but if we do not love, then this is because we have chosen not to love. Therefore we cannot love even after having good intentions. On another side, when we put ourselves in love and grow love in ourselves because we select to do love. In the words of wisdom of Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor, “So put in place the practices of self-love and self-recognition.”

                          The Myth of Romantic Love 

The dream of experiencing intense feelings for work in any place is longed for as an ideal instead of dreaded like a difficult craze; envisioned as a beneficial tragedy rather than a casualty. It is a daily routine in the existence of individuals who feel that love is their destiny. It falls upon weak and disobeyed people to devour them in an explicit fire, or that it is more dropped and more straightforward than joy, community, or deep quality. 

To act as successfully as it does to trick us into marriage, the experience of becoming hopelessly enamored presumably should have as one of its attributes the deception that the experience will endure forever. This deception is encouraged in our way of life by the usually held fantasy of heartfelt love, which has its starting points in our number one youth fantasies, wherein the ruler and princess, once joined together, live cheerfully perpetually later. The legend of heartfelt love tells us, basically, that for each young fellow in the world, there is a young lady who was "intended for him," as well as the other way around. 

In addition, the legend infers that there is just a single man implied for a lady and just a single lady for a man, and this has been foreordained "in the stars." When we meet the individual for whom we are planning, acknowledgement gets through the way that we fall in love. We have met the individual for whom every one of the atmospheres expected us. Since the match is incredible, we can then fulfill every one of one another's necessities for all eternity and, in this manner, live joyfully everlastingly after in excellent association and amicability. Would it be a good idea for it to happen, in any case, that we don't fulfill or address each other's issues in general? Erosion emerges, and we drop out of affection, then obviously a gross error was made, we misread the stars, we didn't attach with our unique solitary pair, our thought process was love was not genuine or "valid" love, and there is no hope about the circumstance but to live miserably ever later or get separated. 

Numerous people devour their whole lives searching for such love, needing to feel such love, pondering when they are first drawn to a partner or young female if that is what they're currently feeling. Most importantly, many people love being delighted, the sensation of cherishing, love even the fierce enthusiasm of being enamored. They are charmed by the excitement that would make them need to pass on instead of not being induced.

Central among the elements of heartfelt love is how it comprises going for affection, not with a substantial individual. It despises simple significant, sensual, sexual love in its high structure. This solemn structure highly esteems being "over" the organic love fulfilled by sexual entertainment or grabbing collaboration with another individual. Genuine love adores the higher energy, the otherworldly joy of adoration, not the body. A lady in sincere love loves being deeply inspired, yearning for additional, to the place of death.

To handle the joy of vitality, emotional love involves a vast devotion, a desire for the endless, a desire to "slip the surly commitments of Time," to run from substantial limitations into the domain of the eternity and the limitless. The body is viewed as insensitive. What it loves is the tenuous otherworldly energy that prominent heartfelt darlings know. It loves feeling raised "over the crowd" into a higher circle. It's anything but a satiated hunger, yet all at once, as a matter of fact, a remarkable inverse. It cherishes the sensation of never being fulfilled, usually up to speed in the longing and abiding in the niceness of want. It feels a sort of difficult resistance toward severe surprise. As Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor reminds us, “Our emotional state is ours to manage.” 

For this reason, real love frantically needs obstacles. It would stop heartfelt if real love were to lead excessively fast to actual fulfilment. It would require managing clothing in disarray, a wreck to tidy up, terrible breath, and hair all rumpled. Then there would be a feast to fix and knock! No, for sincere love, it is vastly improved for satisfaction to be delayed, barriers to be set up, a blade to be set down between the desire couple, or a hue drawn between them. For their heartfelt zeal to persist, they should avoid each other and never get down to the plain conditions of ordinary existence.

 -Muhammad Faisal

  Originally published in JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.

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Conversations with ‘Strangers’ on a Headland by a Stormy Sea

Traditional teachings from Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, of pushing through resistance and reciprocation, through to modern books of ‘Breaking the habit of being yourself’. Teachings weave in, out and through them all. Live, Love You. Walking down towards the ocean pool after having chai tea on the Headland and watching the growing swell. Talking with and listening to wonderful humans, talking about the butterfly story and the influence of the butterfly in terms of allowing others to get through their own stuff and at the same time, to provide somewhat of a safe space for them while they go through. Plus, in our own lives, knowing that when we meet with resistance, it’s about pushing through and the pushing through gives us the strength to emerge a better version of ourself. Without pushing through, we enable ourselves to stay weaker.  One of the lovely people also shared how she found some clay at one of the Headlands and how lovely it was to work with it. Her daughter was the first one to notice it tucked in the side of the track somewhat exposed by the rain and winds. They wanted to feel like what they were taking was okay. So they took a small amount each. Again, lovely discussion, just straight off about the word reciprocity or reciprocation – giving back to. From this can the recommendation of reading a book (or listening to the audio book) of “Braiding Sweetgrass” as in here are examples of how we can give back to the Earth.  A most important teaching repeated from many Traditional peoples, including here (in what’s now known as Australia) an example from one of the Uncles in Durga Country (Western Sydney).

 Uncle showed us a well carved and powerful looking wooden implement that had been made from Casuarina, that’s Sheoak. It was like rounded on one end and pointed on the other. I said, “Oh, it would make a fantastic digging stick, given the heaviness of the end and the point”. And he looked at me in absolute shock and said,

“No, this could never be used on the mother”.

“No because it was intended as a club, and you cannot put a club, and you cannot strike a club into the Earth”. To know that what we intend when we start something, helps us in staying focused, and carries with it the intention of the original thought – the energy and thought and feeling put in as it is being made. This ‘vibe’ has a resonance, and that resonance / vibration has effect.­­­­­­ Reflected again in sharing’s from Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, Cherokee Elder, in terms of basket making. Making and sitting together, when people are sitting around making the baskets and talking the talking flows as the hands are busy. It’s the stories that are woven into the baskets. Or the feeling of what’s in heart and mind of the weaver. All different, unique. Grandmother shared with us that hers where somewhat mis-sharpen and laughed at by others – however the elder wise one shared quietly how the Dragons were dancing and coming out through Grandmother’s Baskets. From here as well in Sydney, when we’ve had wonderful workshops, through Susan Moylan Coombs and run by Aunty Karlene Green from the Torres Strait Islands with regard to weaving words of wisdom. So as we weave, we can listen and chat intentionally, not of a negative. From the First Peoples here, there is a beautiful practice, one may call it a ceremony, a ritual of one of the stories that goes with painting Ochre (fine wet clay) onto another person face.  Again, it’s reciprocation (each person paints the other) and it’s done in a certain way. I won’t repeat it all here, but it’s done in a way that one of the dots is under the chin, and that dot reminds us, and we speak it back to the person who puts it there for us: “Only words of kindness and wisdom pass through these lips” It can be that in community people might be chatting, chatting, and then someone may start speaking bad of someone else and quite subtly, another person will put their finger to their chin. And gently look at the person who may have started speaking that way. This action is a reminder, their only words of kindness and wisdom pass through these lips.  Now listening to Dr. Joe Dispenza’s book, Breaking the habit of being yourself, chapter 7 and 8 this morning’s listening taught how to continuously think and feel a certain way sets up the bio-chemistry that we can then get addicted too. Addicted in such a way that we then think a certain way to create the chemicals that are associated with. By following the First People’s reminder of: ‘only words and kindness and ….”  We see now that in reminding a person, so they choose to stop going on and on about a negative until it becomes an addiction – helps not only them but all around who no longer need to be drawn into the tone-level of that conversation.  That particular way of being, say, I’m speaking bad of somebody or I’m getting angry about something I’m frustrated or I’m blaming or whatever the lower emotions are, that in my own self I’m feeling that chemistry through my body.  As I bathe my cells, as I bathe my precious cells in that chemistry, they are being ‘informed’ (that is provided with information that influences how they form). Changing what DNA is active in our cells IS influenced by what the cells are ‘floating in’ and that is influenced by our thoughts, feelings and foods! From studies (can see references in Joes books or Bruce Lipton or the earlier Dr Candice Pert) that when I have a thought, it creates a substance, that substance is translated to one that can actually move through into my bloodstream and affect the different organs that creates different hormones that have influence on the cells. In short, when I think something and feel it, I am creating an internal chemistry that those cells then get addicted to. So by the First People’s practice of remembering only words of kindness and wisdom through these lips, I can see that that also reminds us in caring deeply for ourselves is to minimize the times when we have a destructive thought created that chemistry bathing ourselves. Less ‘firing’ of the neurons (nerve cells) the less ‘wiring’ them together. This mean the thought/feeling to substance stays at a low level and reduces the likelihood of us becoming addicted to that particular chemistry and thus seeking and magnetizing to us, events that allow us to relive that anger, pain, suffering. In the words of Grandmother, Pa’Ris’Ha, ask who’s talking,  Is it the body addicted to those chemicals that sending the message to your thoughts?  Now, how do we undo the addiction – how do we quite the hunger of the cell’s receptor sites? We observe, catch ourselves and be gentle on ourself.  So, this morning and last night, or this week in particular, I’ve been looking at the final days in the last year “Organizer” or work diary.

Looking at the past year so many days ticked off, ticked off, ticked off, ticked off, ticked off, and I’m about to start a new diary. “Do I want July 2022 to be a series of mouse wheel successes of completed projects, or is there more?”, and of course there is more, which brings us back around to Uncle Greg Sims and intention and Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha and “Who’s Talking”.

 Now asking “how will the next year be different?” getting this clear and intended before writing anything in the new one.

 A big diary. One day to a page. Why so big? I’ve got so much to fit in on each page – really is there that much doingness to do.  Do you write what you “Be”?

 “What do I intend?  How does it look, feel, taste?  How do I put that into my work?”  So, when you’re doing a project ask: “I am doing a project is my internal chemistry one of: “rush, I have to get this done” or “it’s late” etc. or is my internal chemistry saying: “it’s so marvelous to be part of this project”.  Up to us to actively choose to be living the ideal of how we want to see the World. If we want to see, or experience, or hear, about more Kindness – where are we doing this in each of our moments including in our thoughts and feelings?  Know your list of heart fulfilling things and ask: Am I painting?  What I’m doing/thinking/being right now. So from here sitting in an enclosing fold of a cave, looking out over the ocean, feeling the fine mist spay with the smell of salt, looking at the Headland that I love so much, a headland that is solid yet dynamic? Yes in this moment all is handed over to you.  So many tools to assist.  How do we break the habit of being ourselves and create a new one?  And those words “create a new one”, it’s being the pure essence of You without the layer. You as transparent.  That’s when You are, as You are, not as mix of the societal expectations, parental ideas, and influences from the early ages. Seen the gap between You and how you show you’re self to be Know you are enough, you are unique, you are in progress, your lessons can be your strengths.  As Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has said “Do You, I Got Me Covered” Be truly who you came in to be.  With your unique fingerprint.  Be the beingness you are in every moment.

 Geraldene Dalby-Ball

Elaway

Originally published on JamesMWriters blog. Republished with permission.

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Making Maximum Use of Your Brain

Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha ignited in me an interest in studies of the brain. Over a number of years these studies have led me to totally accept and celebrate the information that new neurons can be activated even in adult years. In contrast, my initial introduction to brain studies in nursing school 60 years ago led me to totally accept “hook, line and sinker” that the brain had virtually no ability to repair itself in adult life. Fortunately, it has been proven since those years gone by that amazing potential for healing and repairs exist in the brain.

It is mind boggling to attempt to visualize that there are about one hundred million nerve cells or neurons in every square inch of the cerebral cortex, the outer layer of the brain. This vast number of neurons connect with each other through dendrites (branches on nerves cells) with the role of receiving information across synapses. Like tissues of other parts of the body, if connections are not regularly used, they atrophy. For nerve cells to stay healthy, they must communicate on a regular basis. Through a clear focus on my thoughts, I influence the connections I desire.

Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha reinforces the importance of each individual being consciously involved in creating the desired connections.

Again, it is truly mind boggling that our amazing brain processes 40 billion bits of information every second. It is easy to realize that many of these do not register in conscious thoughts. Generally, most people focus on 70,000 thoughts in a day. In fact, these thoughts redundantly focus on people, places, things, environment and time. In my years of study, I have come to realize that I can reduce this redundancy by feeding some new information into my mind every day.

I have learned that this is a way of adding value to myself, and Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha reinforces that constantly. Science has shown that new information fed into my brain is associated with emotions. These emotions reinforce the ability to expand my thinking in new ways. Such an excellent and effective exercise in getting out of the proverbial “box”!

In contemplating the complexity of the brain leads us to consider some of the minute details of the structure of the brain as well as the vast numbers of cells involved in the functioning of our brain. A tiny slice of brain tissue the size of a grain of sand contains 100,000 brain cells/neurons. The brain tissue is so compact that a chunk of tissue the size of a pebble contains about 2 miles of neurons. The brain as a whole contains 100 billion neurons. Each neuron is only a fraction of a millimeter in size. In spite of the miniscule size of a neuron, some actually extend up to three feet in length.

Another measurement to wrap your mind around is the space between neurons called the synapse is one-millionth of a centimeter in width or one thousandth of a millimeter wide. Yet in this minute space, information travels and is communicated.  

Another avenue to explore in the brain is the Redundant Cycle of Thinking and Feeling. It is suggested that a person can possibly argue about what comes first – a feeling or a thought. Whichever it is, it is common for it to become a redundant cycle that repeats itself so many times that a neural pathway becomes hardwired in the brain. Most people can pull forth a situation in their life when they were caught up in this cycle. The awareness of this redundant cycle is the first important step to making a different choice of thought and/or feeling.

Thoughts of Past Emotional Experiences involved discussions around hardwiring of the brain networks. With any thoughts of highly charged emotional experiences, the brain fires in the exact sequences and patterns as when the actual experience occurred. When we cause our brains to fire and wire to the past, we reinforce those neural circuits to become more hardwired. The more often this cycle occurs, the more hardwired the networks become. Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has led us in discussions of the importance of developing the ability to function at the level of coherent wave patterns. This principle can be applied to any activity we are involved in from surfing the ocean waves, to playing tennis, to baking pies, etc. It is a fact that when we get into a coherent rhythm and pattern in whatever activity we are doing, we resonate with the feel of it and the activity becomes effortless.

The role of Creativity triggered a “light bulb” going off for me. I realize that when a solution is needed for any project the process works when we start with an initial idea. It is exciting that once one idea has materialized others are spawned. It is a chain that moves quickly once the first idea is ignited. What is wonderful about this process is the exhilaration one feels as well as a revitalization!

We have explored with Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, how communication happens between the nerve cells in our brain and nervous system. Four functions occur in the different types of neurotransmitters. These functions are: 1. Excite the brain, 2. Slow the brain down, 3. Make the body sleepy, 4. Make the body be awake.

These messengers/neurotransmitters can stimulate a neuron to either disconnect from its current location or to reinforce the present connection. Most interesting to me is the fact these messengers can change/rewrite the message that is being delivered to the particular cells that are connected. I found myself very excited at the concept of having the neurotransmitters as a major asset in my life.

By getting very familiar with their actions, I believe drugs can have a lesser role in managing symptoms in our bodies. We can call on whatever neurotransmitter would assist in any given situation and bring balance to ourselves. It is easy to feel both relief and excitement at the potential for self-creation by rewiring our brains with new patterns of thinking and feeling. In our sessions with Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, we have learned about different neurotransmitters and their role in our bodies.

One of these is serotonin. Serotonin is the calming neurotransmitter important to the maintenance of “good mood.” It promotes contentment and is responsible for normal sleep. In addition to the central nervous system, serotonin is also found in the walls of the intestine (the enteric nervous system) and in platelet cells that promote blood clotting. Serotonin plays an important role in regulating memory, learning, and blood pressure, as well as appetite and body temperature. Low serotonin levels produce insomnia and depression, aggressive behavior, increased sensitivity to pain, and is associated with obsessive-compulsive eating disorders. Serotonin is synthesized from tryptophan in the presence of adequate vitamins B1, B3, B6, and folic acid. The best food sources of tryptophan include brown rice, cottage cheese, meat, peanuts, and sesame seeds.

“Knowing yourself is true wisdom.” ~Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha

By Joyce Mollenhauer BSN, RN, NC-BC

Originally published on JMWriters blog. Re-published with permission.

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Deep Dive at the Seaside with Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha

Imagine spending five nights on a quiet North Carolina beach in the deep of summer, sitting around a camp fire with a group of spiritual seekers who are on “silence” (not talking). They're quite well occupied contemplating a single passage from an ancient text. Here, Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha is our Elder and coach as we take a deep dive into discovering who and what we truly are.  Or, to say it another way, to “know thyself” is our quest’s goal.  Quite an adventure!

Let me share the story as best as I can recall.  Imagine, perhaps, that you are there too, in the dark, feeding the fire. Staring into the flames. Sheltered on one side by grand dunes and soothed by the sound of the surf only yards away. We won't go back to our tents until dawn. We will spend the whole night in contemplation.

 In the mornings, after a welcomed sleep of several hours, we rise to Grandmother's call to come to sit at a picnic table with our notebooks and share our thoughts and experiences. She will share her oh-so-loving Wisdom with us.  Then, maybe you’ll share a small meal she makes for you in her RV kitchen?

As the sun sinks, you and the seven others prepare for another night of contemplation by the fire, gathering firewood, notebooks, and Medicine blankets. You climb over the dune.  No talking. Seeking—What?  Understanding? An Awakening? Illumination? Peace of Mind? Empowerment? All of these and more, indeed! You look at a piece of paper Grandmother has given you and read quietly by the fire’s light:

I AM, that is the natural life-giving force of all things, FE/MALE of all the elements, the initial progeny of Worlds. Chief of the Divine Powers, Queen of All that are in Hell, the Principal of them that Dwell in Heaven, manifested alone and under one form of all the powers of the Principals.

 At my will, the planets of the sky, the wholesome winds of the sea, and the lamentable silences of hell be disposed; my name, my Divinity is adorned throughout the Worlds, in diverse manners, in variable customs and by the many names.

Quite a mouthful! Quite a claim! Who is this mysterious being?

 The font alone gives the quote an arcane air; as if it comes from some forgotten ancient document or tale of Gods and Goddesses? You have lots of questions!

Who is this bold speaker who appears to claim full Power over the universe itself? Where did Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha get this quotation? Or did she write it herself? Why had she chosen this particular quote for us to ponder?

 Your forehead figuratively furrows in your brain and your eyes roll.  It’s a Mystery! A puzzle. The air is cooling down. We feed the fire and it rises up hot and delicious.

Grandmother has instructed us to take walks on the beach whenever we are moved to do so. She has set some boundaries so we do not wander too far.  But we are free to wade into the waves and stare out to sea, study the surf and the stars; walk back and forth from surf to fire as we please. We do not speak to strangers or each other.

 We seekers know each other reasonably well.  We have traveled to other shores with Grandmother and are building a place called Friendship Village in Ohio, a ceremonial home, retreat and conference center. We are family.

 Sitting by the fire comes naturally to us so there is a silent camaraderie that blesses our shared excursion into inner space.

 The message, the text, is obviously about Divinity. This is not an unfamiliar theme to any of us.

 You start studying each and every word, starting with “I Am that is…!

You, personally know from your own previous studies how very significant the ability to say “I AM” is. It demonstrates the power of the human consciousness to self-reflect and to KNOW THYSELF as an individual, self-contained living entity that has a memory and ability to imagine the future. A self-conscious human being can recognize their own existence over the passage of Time.  This is the tell-tale sign of being a human. We each are fundamentally “I Ams”.

In the Ten Commandments story in the Bible, Moses asks God who he should say spoke to him on the mountain and God says “I AM that I AM!” God gives no real name!

So, this ability to say, “I AM” is also a fundamental characteristic of Divinity as well as of Humanity! Self-consciousness, self-reflection and awareness of existence over Time are things that humanity has in common with the Gods and Goddesses of ancient worlds and cosmic realms.  

 So, the quotation you are studying begins with “I AM that Is” … and goes from there. What a list! What a proclamation! This Entity that speaks is…

 1—The natural life-giving force of all things

2- FE/MALE of all the elements

3- The initial progeny of Worlds.

4-Chief of the Divine Powers.

5-Queen of All that are in Hell.

6- The Principal of them that Dwell in Heaven, manifested alone and under one form of all the powers of the Principals.

  And she sums it up by saying “At My will, the planets of the sky, the wholesome winds of the sea, and the lamentable silences of hell are disposed.

My name, my Divinity is adorned throughout the Worlds, in diverse manners, in variable customs and by the many names.

 What a proclamation!  Worth repeating. Worth contemplating. This is likely a Goddess speaking and she seems to believe she is the Creator/Source and perhaps the Destroyer as well. In any case, this is Divinity speaking.

 Now…a still small voice inside you suggests, since the Speaker goddess is an ‘I AM’ and you are also an “I AM” being, then you are Divine too!  HHmmmmm. No small thought. Of course, because you are a Seeker, you are familiar with this assertion.  That each human is, in essence, an off-shoot of “the Divine One” that is in all Things.

But though you can grasp the notion that you are Divine intellectually, it is difficult to feel divine, or to accept that you have creative powers equal to a God’s. But at least you are on the right track.

 As the nights pass, you consider each word and phrase of the quotation. For instance, you ponder what “FE/MALE” could actually mean. It is oddly written.  The speaker says she is a Queen.  You contemplate “FE” by itself and it occurs to you that that is the chemical symbol for Iron. And iron makes our blood red. Red is often associated with the primal force of life. So “FE, you can conclude, is a good prefix that expresses the life-giving character of a Mother goddess.

 You find that you take particular pleasure in the phrase, “the many names.”  Go figure! Much later you learn of more of her names.

 The weather has been beautiful until one night, Yunsai comes in.  You were prepared somewhat as Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha’ had said something earlier about a new weather front coming in.  And sure enough, that night the wind picks up…

 Out on the beach, looking far North you see approaching a huge, dark cloud bank roiling like you have never seen before! The wind picks up slowly at first, then more fiercely. Thrilling it is! 


 When it is almost directly above, you’re awe-struck! The cloud bank is so very sharp and clearly defined as it towers directly above you. Then the clouds burst and the rain pours. You are soaked by rain, refreshed and cleaned!  You feel so so close to the natural world.

 Yunsai, the North Wind, the powerful Gatekeeper of our Mother Lodge, the White Buffalo, has visited us and blessed us.  We are electrified and re-generated!

 Eventually, when we return to our tents, we find them flattened. But we are troopers and have a good laugh over it all.

 Eventually the days on the beach come to an end.  We sit with Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha in circle and share our thoughts. One person named Minnie speaks up and tells us in a hesitant tone that she had seen a younger version of Grandmother on the beach!  We looking questioningly at each other. Grandmother nods and says “Yes.” She had visited each of us as a younger form of herself! But Minnie was the only one that saw her in that form!  We look at each other and are sad that we had not seen her!

 It was a wonderful week but of course, it comes to an end. You truly had arrived at many conclusions!

 Several years after this North Carolina vision quest (another name for what we were doing), I found a paragraph in a book by Joseph Campbell titled The Power of Myth in a chapter titled The Gift of the Goddess. He cites a source for the origin of the quotation that we had contemplated! I was so excited!!!

 It comes from a second century A.D. novel (one of the first novels ever written) called The Golden Ass by Apuleius.  The speaker is the Goddess Isis.  The original is Latin so the translation is different from what I had become familiar with. But there is no mistaking it.  Isis speaks:

 ….I am Nature, the universal Mother, mistress of all the elements, primordial child of time, sovereign of all things spiritual, queen of the dead, queen also of the immortals, the single manifestation of all gods and goddesses that are.  My nod governs the shining heights of Heaven, the wholesome sea-breezes, the lamentable silences of the world below.  Though I am worshipped in many aspects, known by countless names, and propitiated with all manner of different rites, yet the whole round earth venerates me.  The primeval Phrygians call me Pessinuntica, Mother of the gods; the Athenians, sprung from their own soil, call me Cecropian Artemis; for the islanders of Cyprus, I am Paphian Aphrodite; for the archers of Crete, I am Dictynna; for the trilingual Sicilians, Stygian Proserpine; and for the Elusinians, their ancient Mother of the Corn.

 Some know me as Juno, some as Bellona of the Battles; others as Hecate, others again as Rhamnubia, but both races of Aethiopians, whose lands the morning sun first shines upon, and the Egyptians who excel in ancient learning and worship me with ceremonies proper to my godhead, call me by my true name, namely Queen Isis.  

 Ah!  So many names!  Yet paradoxically, we are ALL the “I Am” —the One that is in All Things! And each of us have our feminine/Mothering aspects as well as the powers and characteristics often associated with the masculine.

 As I sit now in my home, re-reading and re-living by sharing this story, I am eternally grateful to the One called Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha who once took me for a Deep Dive into an ocean of Contemplation, so that I might better Know Myself.  As the Cherokee say:  "Wado! I appreciate"!

 -Dusty (Elizabeth Richie)

 Originally published on JMWriters blog. Re-published by permission.

[jmwriters]

The Risk of Confrontation

Confrontation

First, I am aware that Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor helps us understand that, “to confront is to bring forward whatever the concern is.” One of the dangers of love is confrontation. Conflict is the practice of force with the end goal of redirection. There are two sorts of a showdown you can participate in: poisonous or adoring.

The deadly confrontation has a behavior of "I'm correct, you're off-base, and you ought to transform." It's often impulsive, coming from outrage or bothering, and loaded with vainglorious analysis. Individuals who participate in harmful confrontation do as such with the incautious conviction that they are correct, and the other individual is off-base. Conflict without authentic love is likened to negligently playing God and can be disastrous.

Loving confrontation is described by the mindfulness that facing somebody you love implies setting up a good foundation for yourself (for a brief time) as better than them. Affectionately fierce individuals recognize and respect the other individual's singularity and participate in a conflict solely after fastidious self-assessment. They should decide whether they comprehend the requirements of their accomplice's right to offer redirection if their longing to defy is self-serving and assumes they see the present circumstance. However, cherishing a conflict is additionally playing God with full consciousness of the earnestness of that demonstration, which permits it to be sustaining rather than poisonous.

A confrontation is a loss of initiative.   Shows us how respecting our differences and giving voice While doing so would upgrade profound development, ignoring to confront is passing up on a chance to act with real love. It is the decision not to mind. Cherishing a conflict diverts someone else's way for their more noteworthy tremendous and, in this way, is established in certifiable love. No matter the technique, conflict is essential to help the profound development of individuals we care about.

Practicing power with the end goal of redirection isn't restricted to a confrontation. It should be noticed that conflict isn't generally the ideal way to practice control. Real love implies extending yourself to meet the other individual where they're at, which might mean changing how you convey yourself to match their requirements. Going up against somebody who isn't prepared to deal with what you need to say can be futile or even damaging. At times gentler types of redirection (like facilitating feedback or narrating, if children are involved) are more fitting.

Then, there are two methods for fighting another person: with instinctual and unconstrained conviction that one is correct, or with a retribution that one is likely correct, shown through careful self-questioning and self-assessment. The first is the method of pomposity; it is the most traditional method of guardians, friends, teachers and individuals in their everyday chores; it is generally fruitless, creating more hatred than development and different impacts that were not expected. The second is the method of lowliness; it is not normal, expecting as it does a certified expansion of oneself; it is bound to find true success, and it is never, in my experience, damaging.

For some explanation, countless people have figured out how to hinder their natural propensity to look or stand up to with unconstrained pomposity yet who go no farther, stowing away in the ethical well-being of resignation, never thinking for even a moment to expect power. One such was a pastor and father of a moderately aged patient experiencing a deep-rooted burdensome sorrow.

The priest never retaliated and advised his little girl to answer her mom by accepting punishment silently and being ceaselessly accommodating and aware of the Christian cause. My patient worshipped her dad for his mellowness and "lovingness." It was not highly lengthy, nonetheless, before she understood that his mildness was a shortcoming. In his lack of involvement, he had denied her satisfactory nurturing just as much as her mom had with her mean narcissism. She, at last, saw that he had never really safeguarded her from her mom's underhanded and nothing, truth be told, to defy evil, leaving her no choice except to join her mom's harsh manipulativeness alongside his pseudo humility as good examples.

To neglect to go up against when conflict is expected to sustain otherworldly development addresses an inability to adore, similarly does negligent analysis or judgment and different types of emotional hardship of mindful. If they love their youngster, guardians must, sparingly and cautiously, maybe in any case effectively, go up against them and reprimand them every once in a while, similarly as they should permit their kids to defy and scrutinize themselves thus.

Cherishing companions should repeatedly stand up to one another, assuming the marriage is to serve the capacity to advance the accomplices' profound development. No marriage can be judged as really fruitful except if a couple is each other's best pundits. Similar remains constant for kinship. There is a conventional idea that kinship ought to be a contention-free relationship, a "tit for tat take care of me, I will scratch yours" course of action, depending exclusively on an ordinary trade of favours and praises as recommended by great habits. Such connections are shallow, and closeness stays away from and does not merit the name of companionship so generally applied to them. Luckily, there are signs that our idea of kinship is starting to develop. Common adoring a conflict is a critical piece of all practical and significant human connections. Without it, the relationship is either fruitless or shallow. Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor does stress being mindful.

To face or scrutinize is a practicing authority or power. The activity of force is not much and nothing under an endeavour to impact the course of occasions, human or in any case, by one's actions in a deliberately or unknowingly foreordained way. When we face or reprimand somebody, we need to steer the individual's life. There are numerous other, frequently unrivalled, ways of impacting the course of occasions than by a showdown or analysis: as a visual cue, idea, anecdote, award and discipline, addressing, restriction or authorization, making of encounters, arranging with others, etc. Volumes can be expounded on the specialty of practicing power. For our motivations, nonetheless, at the very least adoring people should agonize about this craftsmanship. At this point I am reminded of what Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor would often say, “There is but one rule and that is Respect.”

When one longing to sustain one more's magical action, one should worry about the best method for achieving this in some unexpected happening. Adoring guardians, for instance, should initially look at themselves and their qualities severely before deciding precisely that they realize what is best for their youngster. Then, having made this assurance, they need to give a more central idea to the youngster's personality and limits before concluding whether the kid would be bound to answer well to a showdown than to applaud or expanded consideration or narrating or another type of impact. To go up against somebody with something the person cannot deal with the will, best case scenario, be an exercise in futility and reasonable will make a malicious difference. If we desire to be heard, we should communicate in a language the audience can comprehend and on a level at which the audience is fit for work. Assuming we are to adore, we should stretch ourselves to change our correspondence to the limits of our darling.

Practicing power with affection requires much work, but what about the wager? The issue is that the seriously cherishing one is, the more frank one is. Yet, the more modest one is, the more one is awed by the potential for a presumption in practicing power. Why should I impact the course of human occasions? By what authority am I qualified to conclude what is best for my kid, companion, nation, or humankind? Who gives me the option to try to have confidence in my comprehension and afterwards to dare to apply. That is the wager. At whatever point we practice power, we endeavour to impact the course of the world, of humankind, and we are accordingly playing God. “What we do affects not only us but also the seven generations Past and Future” says, Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor. Most guardians, educators, pioneers, and the more significant part of us who exercise power-have no comprehension of this. In the egotism of practicing power without the all out mindfulness requested by affection, we are ecstatically, however, disastrously uninformed.

Nevertheless, the individuals who genuinely love and in this manner work for the insight that adoration requires to know that to act is to play God. However, they additionally realize that there is no option except inaction and ineptitude. Love forces us to play God fully cognizance of the immensity of the way that is precisely what we are doing. With this awareness, the caring individual takes on the obligation of endeavoring to be God and not thoughtlessly recreate God, to satisfy God's will without botch. Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor would tell us that “each of us Matter”. We all are capable to respond with the ability and respect of others. Then, we show up at one more oddity: out of the modesty of affection, people might try to be God at any point.

- Muhammad Faisal

 Originally published on JMWriters Blog. Re-published with permission.

[jmwriters]

Is the Universe a Medicine Wheel?

At first, Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha's ideas and teachings regarding the Medicine Wheel seemed rather strange to me. Nevertheless, slowly but surely, I embraced the wisdom and power of these ideas. I loved and respected my teacher, Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha. Indeed, I had asked her to teach me! Intuitively I felt that much would be gained by remaining open and curious—on the Medicine Wheel and on so much else!  

 Here I would like to explain how I personally arrived at an understanding of what and why the UNIVERSE can be seen as a veritable Medicine Wheel! Or to use a mathematical formula called an “identity” to describe my thesis, UNIVERSE=Medicine Wheel.

 I’ll start by asking: What is the UNIVERSE??? Many would likely agree, if asked— that “UNIVERSE” is the best word for describing the BIGGEST place that exists and it contains everything! For the sake of discussion, I am going to just say that The UNIVERSE is that which contains ALL things, and inside this HUGE UNIVERSE there are wild cosmic phenomena such as stars and Quasars, and Black Holes…and galaxies, and solar systems and little planets, and smaller oceans, and molecules and atoms, matter and anti-matter, energy, life and death, cats, humans, ET’s and so on. Let us say that the word, “UNIVERSE”, —the thing I am talking about here—also contains (if such things exist at all) such tricky, weird phenomena as parallel universes, Heaven and/or Hell, and/or the Bardo or the Woo. In other words, for the sake of discussion—here on this little computer—I am going to say that the UNIVERSE is EVERYTHING that exists—the Whole Kit and Caboodle, in other words. And that’s why the first part of the word, UNIVERSE, is “UNI”, meaning “ONE”. When taken as a unified whole, there is only ONE of “All That Is.”

 Now surprisingly enough, I know that whoever is reading this is likely a human being who has the enormous, wonderful capability of Imagining inside their brain, just what I have described. You can see, with little effort, in your mind’s eye, THE UNIVERSE. Maybe you have to sort of scan back and forth to see it all. Or you may have to conjure a spiral galaxy and let that disappear into blackness and then look at a blazing star next. But you have probably seen enough pictures of astronomical phenomena to, in a manner of speaking, “see” the UNIVERSE in all its glory with one magnificent sweeping effort of your imagination. 

 Just as a reminder, let me say that although I spent years using a Medicine Wheel for doing prayers and ceremonies and heard many teachings about the Medicine Wheel from Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, —Living is Learning! I make no promise that my grasp of the Medicine Wheel is perfect! And in this small space, I’ll really just be giving very basic, “basics.” I hope you will find wisdom and joy in my words!  As I heard a lecturer say once: “Don’t say ‘no’—just say “‘Oh!’”

 Can you imagine now, what is at the base of all the swirling galaxies and nebulae and suns? Of what is all that “out there” composed? Why does it appear to be filled with darkness and empty space while we are told by scientists that energies of immense magnitude truly rule both this empty space and the objects that populate it? Electro-magnetism, plasma, gravity, quantum fields, frequencies, etc. We humans are dwarfed by the mysterious energies and forces at play in our UNIVERSE…and many humans pay little attention to this Great Mystery that unfolds endlessly before us during our lifetimes. 

 Once upon a Time…there was an entity that was believed to be a Living Force, a Divine Creator, hidden behind all the darkness and behind and within the light as well. Cultures world-wide proclaimed and celebrated this entity (or entities) this Sacred Being or (or Beings.) The general English word we use today for such a Creative Force is “God.” Many still believe!

 But there are so many distractions! Wars and rumors of wars. Lockdowns. Pandemics. Financial crises. NFL Sports! Children to care for. Parents to care for. Injustice. PTSD. Sexual identity. And on and on and on. Who has time to contemplate the gods?

 Oh…I‘m just kidding around with you. Instead of priests and churches, here in America, self-help coaches and yoga teachers are a dime a dozen these days. And of course, scientists are also easily found too. They all have answers. 

 One of the very popular wisdoms of the day that I’ve embraced is that “We create our own reality.” It seems pretty obvious to me that our material reality is (to say it in very simple terms) created out of condensed energies. Matter is composed of energetic phenomena such as electrons, protons, neutrons that in turn are shaped by waves or frequencies that do not appear to physical/materialistic observation but which organize sub-atomic particles prior to physical manifestation. Thus, our reality is brought into physical existence through a process sometimes called “Downward causation.” 

  But how does all this relate to the Medicine Wheel?   

 Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha taught from her own native heritage, the Cherokee, and so it is the Cherokee Medicine Wheel that I am familiar with. 

 Let me very briefly describe it. I am in no way an authority in this matter but one need not be an authority to make the points I wish to make, which is that symbolically speaking, the Medicine Wheel paints a symbolic picture of the UNIVERSE. Or it represents a kind of “As above, so Below” context where one can create one’s own reality. That is, interacting with the Wheel creates a mini-UNIVERSE where-in one can activate one’s own personal influence in the UNIVERSE at large. 

 Imagine a flat piece of land where rocks have been laid out in a circle in the manner of a clock. Let us say it has a diameter of 20 to 30 feet. Rocks (roughly the size of a basketball, more or less) are placed on the circumference particularly in the place of “the Four Directions”, North, South, East and West. This placement creates four quadrants.  The stones at the Four Directions represent the “Gates” that are kept by Four Gatekeepers. In this Cherokee Wheel, Yunsai, White Buffalo, is in the North; Waya (the Wolf) is the Gatekeeper in the South; Awahili, the Eagle, is the Gatekeeper of the East.

 (Three other stones are placed in the Center of the Wheel, representing the Above, the Below and the Center.) 

 The Medicine Wheel is, among other things, a Way to see the UNIVERSE. If you stand in a field, raise your arm and point to the horizon, and turn in a circle, the universe extends out from you as if a giant circle! As the words in the original Broadway production of The Sound of Music go:  “Every star and every whirling planet, And every constellation in the sky, revolves around the Center of the Universe, that lovely thing called ‘I’.”  You are uniquely the center of YOUR Universe! 

 Each of the Gates and Gatekeepers are characterized by attributes.  Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha shared with us a long list of attributes held by the Buffalo, Eagle, Black Bear and Wolf.

 The attributes of the White Buffalo, for instance, are the following: Will, Wisdom, Water, Freezing Winds, Creative Force, Intuition, Death, Life, Star-Seeds, Allowing, Potential, Path of Success, Power, Action, Control, Priorities, Goals, Accomplishments, Results, Recognition, Effective Action through Thought, Testing, Tempering for Defeat of imbalanced and destructive thought forms, Give-A-Way, Renew, Freedom Creation. From the Frozen Waters comes the promise of the Future. Color is Pale Blue or Blue. 

 It took years for me to come into a relationship with the Medicine Wheel as a representation of the entire Universe. But today I feel confident that with that wonderful gift of the imagination, I can stand and look to the North and imagine and “see” in my mind’s eye, the attributes of the North flowing toward me, empowering me, gifting me, blessing me, teaching me. But I do not just imagine these things.  I can FEEL them as well.  I can activate my heart with love, appreciation and caring for the Gifts. I can smile and celebrate these Gifts! I can influence by creating a frequency of Appreciation within my Being, within my heart, my soul, my Spirit and mind…. thus, I set up the proper conditions for the manifestation of all good Gifts right here on the planet Earth in my life. If I choose, I can chant and dance in celebration of the Attributes which is a very powerful way to draw something into manifestation.

 To put it another way, I could imagine the UNIVERSE NOT as just an endless, empty darkness with no rhyme or reason— as a mindless, infinite field of matter, frequency and energy but still out of my reach. But understanding the dynamics of manifestation of reality, I now choose to see the UNIVERSE as a multi-dimensional Medicine Wheel that can enable me to assist in the transformation and healing of my planet. 

 For your edification, here are the attributes of the other three gatekeepers that I have come to know.

 South—Waya—Wolf—Regeneration, Action, Adolescence, Earth, Wet Winds, Path of Duty, Innocence, Reason, Logic, Information, Design, Pathfinders, Teachers, Responsibility, Stewardship, Appropriate, Thoroughness, Precision, Principles, The Plan, Activity, Abundance, Fire Keeper, Future, DOING. Color is White.

 West—Yona—Black Bear—Introspection, Integration, Assimilation, Wind, Blazing Winds, PATH of Service, Manifestations, Balancing of Experience, Birthing the New, Friends, Team Work, Sensitivity, harmony, Watchful, All Seeing, Listening, Attention, Consensus, Merging with Spiritual consciousness, Death of Ego, Old Age, Trusting, Nurturing, Oneness, Being. Color is Black.

 East—Awahili—Eagle or Red Tail Hawk—Illumination, Integration, Fire, Gentle Winds, Path of Pleasure, Personal excitement, Fame, Talking, Inspiring, Motion, Coming and going, Stimulation, Ideas, Intent, Understanding, Having, Leadership, Hearty, BEGINNINGS, PHYSICAL, VISION, INTUITION.  Color is Red. 

 Where, you might ask, does God fit into this portrayal of the UNIVERSE?  

 Well, when I dance or pray in the Medicine Wheel, (or even as I walk down the street gazing at all the beauty around me) -- I suggest that I am acting in harmony and co-ordination with a Divine Creator--the ONE THAT IS IN ALL THINGS--a malleable Great Mystery whose body IS the veritable, infinite UNIVERSE. This Godly Being gives of itself and manifests from thoughts and feelings and beliefs that I send out to it! My consciousness counts!

 The universe, in my view, is a Holy and Sacred multiplicity of phenomena that if view as a tool for Creation. Wisely viewed, it cooperates very handily with the human being. Each and every human is simply and profoundly the Co-Creator if one makes the decision to be so. It’s our decision. And if we master these sorts of Teachings, we can do "Medicine" and heal the Earth and her Peoples!

 Now, I give much appreciation to Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha and her Cherokee tradition for her generous conveyance of wisdom!

 -BDW

  Originally published on JMWriters Blog. Re-published by permission.

[jmwriters]

Walk Into the Rain

Oh of course it was raining today, off and on , and it was reasonably cold. Nearly winter, and yes, cold is very personal experience, to say it’s cold:, to feel cold. Looking out the window I see bike riders, runners, people walking their dogs and they seem to be ok, not noticing that it is cold….I wrap the blanket around me just a little tighter. What is inside of me to feel this way? The temperature gage indicates a reasonably mild temperature…and it’s only autumn, nearly winter is only my interpretation…so, are my thoughts determining how I feel? Really?

 Well here are my options: I could  go back to bed (I would love that!) – I could have a bath- (I would love that too) - I could turn on the heater and snuggle up with my cat – if she is willing….(that’s of course lovely) and stay away from the world outside…that is how I feel and why I feel cold inside. I could also challenge my thoughts and feelings and go outside! There would be nothing wrong with following my feelings, but I know I can make better choices for myself, which will improve my wellbeing. Is that an easy task to accomplish today? No.

 I remember Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha’s words of empowerment, about knowing our strengths and  I consider to get dressed and go for a walk. The moment I do, my mind is chattering away, trying to convince me otherwise. My internal dialogue goes something like this: Why would you go outside?  You could just do your favourite things like float in a warm bath or read a book in bed, have a cup of tea, enjoy the company of your sweet cat, be a little inactive after a busy week (I deserve a rest don’t I? After all it is Sunday!)… and so on. The arguments are endless and quite convincing!

 I  have however made my decision, getting dressed and wading through the piles of excuses towards the front door I hesitated momentarily when I saw my cat curled up on the couch, tempted…but felt by then also determined to master my thoughts and feelings and to beat the cold I felt inside. Yah!

 I firmly told my thoughts to get out of the way and stepped outside.

 The weather looked like rain, looked cold, but felt surprisingly comfortable in temperature once I started walking. I was dressed warmly, and had taken my raincoat. It crossed my mind how Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha had always spoken about her and our connection with the elements….I knew deep inside that once outside I would be very happy. Once I opened my eyes to the world and looked at the trees around me, the sky- grey or not- once I felt the wind on my cheeks and the raindrops gently touching my skin, I was truly very happy. It only took about three strides and my whole body said: Yes! Yes! Yes! And: More! More! More! And as if in automatic mode my body carried itself forward a s if by magic. My arms, my legs felt wonderful as all my muscles started moving, my cells danced in joy at being exposed to exercise and fresh air. All my cells seemed to be working now, each doing what they do best, depending on where they were located: stomach, muscles, heart, brain. How many cells again? I believe Grandmother Pa’ris’Ha cited research stating there were trillions of cells at work? Amazing! I felt clarity of mind.

 My heart was filled with life-giving blood, pumping, my skin felt invigorated and my face showed a smile; the smile just came about, just like that! With the smile my mood improved instantly, from feeling a bit gloomy and feeling like curling up inside, I now felt like opening myself to the world, maybe meeting people along my way, saying hello, stopping for a while….

 And after a brisk walk which truly had me feeling warm….I did stop…and sat under a tree. The rain had paused for now and the ground under the tree was dry, the tree protecting me from any weather and sharing its love with me as I sat down and leant against its trunk. I was very still and quiet as nature began to speak, first very gently with winds moving around me, with little creatures crawling across me, then louder through the rustling of branches and leaves, some of them falling on me and around me, floating down in the rhythm of autumn, then birdsong in the distance- a melancholic song aligned with the moods of the season. As I stopped my thinking and allowed thoughts to pass by for the moment, not rushing them away but rather gently asking them to move past the screen of my mind, acknowledging their presence, welcoming them to return at a later time, my mind slowly stilled and it seemed that after a while only the winds were speaking to me, communication that Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha had often mentioned.

 Now the ground feels solid underneath me, supportive, I become one with Mother Earth, her creatures, the trees, the wind and the clouds. Some raindrops find my cheeks and roll down, caressing me….I feel a sense of peace and love, centred deep in my heart and soul. I notice a connection between the ground and my spine. It seems as if a current is finding its way up my spine, slowly moving towards my brain and beyond, lighting up my brain, charging it and then moving up into the sky and the ether. I imagine that creation becomes one with me, that I am in fact the trees and the trees are me, that the ants crawling over my legs know me, have always known me and welcome my presence, feel safe in my presence as I will not harm them, and I have known them, have known of them in the scheme of things, as part of greater life and the universe. Grandmother Pa’Ris”Ha has always spoken about our inter-connectedness with all life and how any of our actions, thoughts and words have a wide-reaching effect. I now know.

 Ah the universe!! Here I am sitting under a tree in the forest and realise -in utter wonder- that I am in fact part of the ever so wondrous universe! How profound, how humbling, how exciting! I picture in my inner mind the many stars, planets, the endless sky, the vastness of the universe and of course the ever life-giving sun! Despite the clouds today, Grandfather sun has risen this morning, without fail,  in the East and has cast his warmth upon us all. So kind. So reliable. Warmth, light, nurture, hope. As sure as every day the sun will set in the West later inviting the night to come. Nature’s cycles. Universal cycles and laws. I have forgotten about time and space, I have not thought about where I am, or what time it is.  I wonder even: do I know who I am? Where do I come from? Where will I go when it is time? I leave the questions as they move past me, questions for another time. For now I just close my eyes, allowing myself to be immersed in the sounds of the forest, the sounds of nature, focussed on feeling the winds, the occasional raindrop caressing my face. I feel the ground, the fallen leaves with my hands as I drift into another world, the world inhabited by fairies and other magical beings, seen or unseen I know they are around me, curious and playful. I smile, I am happy, I am content in the peace of the moment, no past, nor present, just here and now. My whole body is relaxed as I seem to float like the autumn leaves in the story of my imaginations, as I fly with eagles in the dreamworld of my mind, above the clouds toward infinity, as I let go of what is binding me to Earth, to this dimension just for a little time, while I experience the endlessness of the vast heavens and the unlimitedness of who I can be. I sense a lightness in my being lifting me and I feel creator’s embrace: warm, comforting, all-knowing, loving. I belong. I am loved beyond words.

I would like to remain there, it’s so peaceful, none of the challenges of three-dimensional life can reach me here, emotions, thoughts, other people.

 I return slowly in time to notice the weather getting cooler and raindrops falling more densely. My face is getting wet, I laugh – it feels refreshing and invigorating. I already feel the first signs of the evening approaching. I hold the deep inner peace I have just experienced carefully in my hands and my heart, determined to not let it go, ever, it feels so, so wonderful. I carefully get up, aware of not hurting any of the little creature around me. Walking back towards home I lift my face to the rain, letting the water run of my face, smiling, each raindrop telling me a story of love and appreciation and my gratitude is embracing the forest, the sky and the universe. I am. I am that I am.

In that moment I do not feel any separation, I feel like a fairy myself and in wondrous exaltation I skip and I dance in the rain.

 What a wonderful afternoon it has been. Warm not only physically – despite my initial sense of it being a cold day, but warm in my soul and peaceful in my heart and mind. As I approach home I slowly allow my thoughts to return, and they do, and that is ok, I welcome them, as my dear friends. My mind is not filled with chitter-chatter as before, it quietly thinks about plans for rest of the day, dinner, and yes, a bath!

My experience stays with me, I am mindful for the rest of the day, sense my connection to the All, both my humility and greatness in the face of the universe, my endless gratitude for being on beautiful Mother Earth at this time, being able to experience her beauty, the weathers and also thankful for the experience and learning as a human being with emotions and thoughts, as challenging this may be at times. I appreciate the ability to feel and all facets of it: happiness and gratitude, sadness and pain. I know that I can be in control of my mind, that thoughts cannot determine who I am,  or how I behave, neither am I driven by my emotions. Acknowledging thoughts and feelings I can accept these as integral part of the human experience, welcome them in a sense and take charge, like I did this morning; I feel empowered.

 Yes I felt cold, yes I felt like curling up in bed, away from the outside world. My mind had a million reasons and excused ready for me, but I stood strong, asked my thoughts and feelings to step aside and chose differently. I do not for a moment regret my choice: being with nature, being mindful and meditating, and letting go was a beyond beautiful and truly magical experience. As I glance out of the window the sun has begun setting in the West, another day is coming to its end, the elements retiring into the dark. The moon will remain behind the clouds tonight, nevertheless watching over us, as I say my prayers. I will have a warm bath, floating, one with the water and retire to bed, curl up with the magnificence of the world inside me, my cat’s warmth comforting me, with the universe taking me into a dreamworld, not much different from the one I encountered in the forest earlier today. My mind is still, and calm, my body relaxed; I feel the sound of my heart’s beat, strong and regular as I drift into the other worlds with a smile on my face….

 © Adi 2022

 Originally published by JMWriters Blog. Re-published with permission.

[jmwriters]

Communication from the Other Side

As I sit and always try to gather my thoughts a strange thing always happens to me or maybe it happens to everyone who tries to put into words and on a piece of paper the experience when you have a realization of spirit and who we really are. 

This past weekend we laid the ashes to rest of my sister-in-law in the mountains of North Carolina. To begin to say that it was the most beautiful experience in such a magnificent place does not even begin to describe it. 

My niece rented a 5-bedroom house overlooking the mountains and my husband's side of the family all gathered for the weekend.  From the moment we arrived we began to be gifted with the beauty of the messages that I knew were the embodiment of my sister-in-law. Grandmother Parisha always teaches that we are not the body, we are spirit and energy in the altar called a body. Most recently I have been having moments of awareness of this truth and it has been really amazing. It is also in the form of receiving communication with loved ones who have passed.

 As we arrived and were at sunset and settling in, we were visited by a butterfly that danced around each one of us and seemed to just hover in the middle of our circle as if visiting. It was not your normal butterfly, it was a Monarch, really big and beautiful.  I knew it was her communicating. I told everyone it was her and all could feel her energy. As we sat down to dinner later that evening and began to pray and bless the food. The lights in the house began to flicker.  We all knew!  Many of us could feel her presence. 

The next day of the spreading of her ashes as we hiked up into the area that my niece had designated there was an amazing bubble of love that I felt that surrounded us. We were together as Family and to me this has always been an important part of my life. To spend time with my grown children and see their interactions throughout the whole weekend with their cousins and the rest of the family was a very proud moment for me as their mother. I am in love!  My children have grown up to be amazing individuals. As we prepared the smoke bowl for the ceremony as Grandmother Parisha has taught me, each one of us said a prayer into the herb that we placed into the bowl. We honored Sage the feminine aspect, Cedar the masculine aspect and Sweet grass the balance of the two, Lavender to represent the beauty that my sister-in-law always carried herself as.  The smoke beautifully took our prayers into the wind. 

As each one of us took turns taking a handful of ashes to the wind. I watched how the wind seemed to come and caress the ashes. It was such an amazing thing to observe. These things as I write I realize I really did see this. Because what the mind tends to do as Grandmother Parisha has taught me is it tendsto deny what you really saw. We are programmed to believe very differently that death is something totally different. She has always said " Death is just the changing of the garment." Our loved ones who have passed continue to be but in different form. Yes, we miss their physical presence but they continue to be with us in energy and spirit.  I really felt and understood that this weekend. After we finished the ceremony at exactly 12:12, once again I felt a synchronicity that the number 12 was signifying a year in a cycle of life as we measure time in the 12-month calendar. Her cycle had been complete her body altar ashes had been laid to rest. 

It was time for lunch as we wrapped things up at the site that we were at, so everyone was hungry. My niece googled restaurants near us and the first restaurant that came up was “Bellas" ten minutes away!  As she told us we all burst out into tears because you see my niece's name for my sister-in-law was "Bella".  Of course, we knew it was her communicating. So, we had lunch at Bellas an Italian restaurant and it was delicious! 

That night as we sat at sunset on the deck overlooking the mountain. We were visited by cardinal. It came on deck and landed close to us and seemed to be looking right at us and cocked its head. Grandmother Parisha has taught me that Cardinal is woman's medicines. My sister-in-law was a very elegant and feminine woman.  We finished an absolutely beautiful day and traditional Colombian meal that my kids and I made and dessert by the fire pit.  The icing on the cake to a spectacular day that my words don't even do it justice. 

The rest of the weekend was amazing being with family laughing and cooking and bonding together on hikes and around the camp fire. So much appreciation for all that occurred this weekend and for the communication from the other side.

 Yes they are there!

  By MAJ

  Originally published on JMWriters Blog. Re-published by permission.

[jmwriters]

Dependency

Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha always has spoken to that part of ourselves that we step away from as also who we really were.

The second most normal misguided judgment about affection is the possibility that reliance is love. This is a misguided judgment with which psychotherapists should bargain consistently. Its impact is seen most decisively in a person's endeavor or signal or danger to end it all or who becomes incapacitating and discouraged in light of dismissal or detachment from life partner or darling. According to such an individual, "I would rather not live; I cannot survive without my significant others. I love him [or her] so much.

 Moreover, when I answer, I now and again do, "You are mixed up; you do not cherish your better half." "What do you mean?" is the irate inquiry. "I just let you know I cannot survive without him [or her]." I attempt to make sense of: "What you portray is parasitism, not love. Whenever you require one more person for your endurance, you are a parasite on that person. There is no decision, no opportunity to engage with your relationship. It involves needing instead of affection. Love is the free activity of decision. Two individuals love each other just when they are very equipped for living without one another yet decide to live with one another."

 I characterize reliance as the failure to encounter completeness or work enough without assurance. One is actually focused on by another. Reliance on actual solid grown-ups is obsessive. It is wiped out, generally a sign of dysfunctional behavior or imperfection. It is to be recognized based on what is regularly alluded to as the need might arise or sentiments, regardless of whether we attempt to profess to other people and ourselves that we do not have reliance on requirements and ideas.

 We all have wanted to be coddled, supported without exertion on our parts, focused on by people more grounded than us who have our inclinations genuinely on a fundamental level. Regardless of how solid we are, irrespective of how mindful and capable and grown-up, if we look profoundly into ourselves, we will view the wish as dealt with for a change. Regardless of how old and mature, every one of us searches for and might want to have a delightful mother figure and mentor in our life.

 These longings or sentiments do not govern our lives; they are not the dominating topic of our reality. When they genuinely do manage our lives and direct the nature of our existence, then, at that point, we have more than just reliance on needs or sentiments; we are reliant.

 In particular, one whose life is administered and directed by reliance needs experiences a mental issue to which we credit the analytic name "latent ward behavioral condition." It is maybe the most widely recognized of every mental problem.

 Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha maintains “we share the fact that we have feelings: what we do with this gift is up to us.”

 Individuals with this issue, inactive ward individuals, are so bustling looking to be cherished that they have no energy passed on to adore. They resemble ravenous individuals, searching for any place they can pay for food and without any food of their own to provide for other people. It is as though inside them, they have an internal vacancy, an abyss shouting out to be filled, however, which can never be filled. They won't ever feel "full-filled" or have a feeling of fulfillment. They generally think "a piece of me is missing." They endure dejection ineffectively. Due to their absence of completeness, they have no genuine feeling of character, and they characterize themselves exclusively by their connections. Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha shares, “that the part of ourselves that we step away from is also who we really were.”

 A thirty-year-old punch press administrator, incredibly discouraged, came to see me three days after his better half had left him, taking their two kids. She had taken steps to leave him multiple times previously, griping of his absolute absence of regard for her and the kids. Each time he had begged her to remain and had vowed to change; however, his change had never endured over a day, and this time she had completed her danger. He had not rested for two evenings, was shaking with nervousness, had destroyed streaming his face and was genuinely considering self-destruction. "I can't survive without my family," he said, sobbing, "I love them."

 "I'm perplexed," I shared with him. "You've let me know that your better half's grievances were substantial, that you failed to help her, that you returned home just when you were satisfied, that you weren't keen on her physically or inwardly, that you wouldn't converse with the youngsters for quite a long time, that you never played with them or took them anyplace. You have no relationship with any of your family, so I don't have the foggiest idea about why you're so discouraged over the passing of a relationship that won't ever exist."

 "Don't you see?" he answered. "I'm nothing now. Nothing. I have no spouse. I have no youngsters. I don't have the foggiest idea of who I am. I may not like them, but rather I should cherish them. I'm nothing without them."

 Since he was so genuinely discouraged, having lost the personality that his family gave him, I planned to see him again two days later, so I anticipated slight improvement. Yet, when he returned, he bobbed into the workplace smiling merrily and declared, "All is Great at this point."

 "Did you reunite with your family?" I inquired. "Goodness, no," he answered cheerfully, "I haven't heard from them since I saw you. However, I met a young lady the previous evening down at my bar. She said she truly enjoys me. She's isolated, very much like me. We have a date again this evening. Yet again, I feel like I'm human. I surmise I don't need to see you once more."

 This quick alterability is typical for detached subordinate people. Maybe it doesn't make any difference whom they are subject to the same length as there is simply somebody. It doesn't make any difference what their personality is as long as there is somebody to give it to them. Thus, their connections, albeit emotional in their power, are very shallow. In light of the strength of their feeling of inward vacancy and the craving to fill it, latent ward individuals will stream no deferral in satisfying their requirements for other people. A wonderful, splendid and somehow or another excellent young lady had, from the age of seventeen to 21, a practically vast series of sexual associations with men constantly underneath her regarding insight and capacity. She went starting with one washout and then onto the next. The issue arose because she couldn't stand by to the point of searching out a man fit for her or even browse among the numerous men very quickly accessible to her. Within 24 hours after the cutting off a friendship, she would get the primary man she met in a bar and come into her next treatment meeting praising him excitedly. "I know he's jobless and drinks excessively, yet he's competent, focusing on me fundamentally. I realize this relationship will work."

 It never took care of business, since she had not picked well as well as because she would then start an example of sticking to the man, requesting increasingly more proof of his friendship, looking to be with him continually, declining to be let be. "It is because I love you so much that I can't tolerate being isolated from you," she would tell him; however, eventually, he would feel smothered entirely and caught, without space to move, by her "adoration." A vicious would happen, the relationship would be ended, and the cycle would start once more the following day. The lady had the option to break the cycle solely after three years of treatment, during which she came to see the value in her insight and resources, to recognize her vacancy and appetite and recognize it from veritable love, to acknowledge how her yearning was driving her to start and stick to connections that were adverse to her, and to recognize the need for the strictest sort of discipline over her craving if she somehow happened to profit by her resources.

  "I need to be attached to somebody who truly focuses on me." Not one referenced bearing down hard work, making a masterpiece, committing to the local area, being in a position where the person could adore or even have youngsters. The idea of exertion was not associated with their: fantasies; they envisioned just a manageable uninvolved condition of getting care. I told them, as I tell numerous others: "Assuming being cherished is your objective, you will neglect to accomplish it. The best way to make sure of being cherished is to be an individual deserving of affection, and you can't be an individual deserving of adoration when your essential objective in life is to inactively be loved." This isn't to say that disconnected ward someone’s never get things done for other people; however, their rationale in doing things is to solidify the connection of the others to them to ensure their consideration. Furthermore, when the chance of care isn't straightforwardly involved, they have great trouble in "getting things done." Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has always spoken to how we could work together.

 All the individuals from the previously mentioned bunch found it tortuously challenging to purchase a house, separate from their dwellers, see some work, leave an unacceptable old work or even put themselves in a side interest.

 In marriage, there is typically a separation of the jobs of the two life partners, a regularly effective division of work between them. The lady does the cooking, housekeeping and shopping typically and focuses on the children; the man ordinarily keeps up with business, handles the funds, cuts the grass and makes fixes. Solid couples instinctually will change jobs occasionally. The man might prepare a dinner sometimes, go through one day seven days with the youngsters, clean the house to surprise his better half; the lady might find a part-time line of work, trim the grass on her significant other's birthday, or take control over the financial records and bill-paying for a year.

 The couple may frequently consider this job exchange a play that changes their marriage. It is this, yet maybe more significant (regardless of whether it is done unknowingly), a cycle lessens their shared reliance. It might be said, every mate is preparing oneself for endurance in case of the deficiency of the other. In any case, for uninvolved ward individuals, the fault of the other is such a scary possibility that they can't confront planning for it or enduring a cycle that would reduce the reliance or increment the opportunity of the other.

 Therefore, it is one of the conduct signs of inactive ward individuals in the marriage that their job separation is unbending, and they look to increment as opposed to decrease shared reliance to make marriage more instead of, to a lesser extent, a snare. This way, for what they call love yet what is genuinely reliance, they decrease their own and each other's opportunity and height. Once in a while, as a feature of this cycle, detached subordinate individuals, when hitched, will spurn abilities that they had acquired before marriage. An illustration of this is the normal condition of the spouse who "can't" drive a vehicle. A fraction of the time in such circumstances, she may never have learned, yet in the excess cases, now and again purportedly on account of a minor mishap, she fosters a "fear" about driving sooner or later after marriage and stops. The impact of this "fear" in the country and rural regions, where the vast majority reside, is to deliver her reliance upon her better half and chain her significant other to her by her vulnerability.

 Presently, he should do all the looking for the family himself or drive her on all shopping endeavors. Since this conduct generally satisfies the reliance needs of the two life partners, it is never viewed as wiped out or even as an issue to be addressed by most couples. Whenever I proposed to a generally incredibly shrewd broker that his better half, who abruptly quit driving at age 46 due to a "fear," could have an issue meriting mental consideration, he said, "Goodness, no, the specialist told her it was a direct result of menopause, and you can't hope to make any meaningful difference with that." She was secure in the information that he wouldn't have an unsanctioned romance and leave her since he was so occupied after work taking her shopping and driving the youngsters around.

 He was secure in the information that she wouldn't have an unsanctioned romance and leave him since she didn't have the portability to meet individuals when he was from her. Through such a way of behaving, latent ward relationships might be made enduring and secure. Yet, they can't be thought of as either solid or adoring because the security is bought at the cost of opportunity, and the relationship serves to hinder or obliterate the development of the singular accomplices. Over and over, we let our couples know that "a decent marriage can exist just between two in number and free individuals."

 Passive dependency has its beginning in the absence of affection. The inward sensation of vacancy from which aloof ward individuals endure is the immediate aftereffect of their folks' inability to satisfy their requirements for fondness, consideration and care during their young life. It was referenced in the central area that youngsters who are cherished and focused on with relative consistency throughout growing up enter adulthood with a well-established feeling that they are adorable and essential, and this way will be adored and focused on as long as they stay consistent with themselves. Kids were experiencing childhood in an environment where love and care are missing or given gross irregularity enter adulthood with no such feeling of internal security.

 Instead, they have an inward sense of frailty, a sensation of "I need something more", a feeling that the world is unusual and uncompromising, and a feeling of themselves as tentatively adorable and significant. It is no big surprise, then, at that point, that they want to scramble for affection, care and consideration any place they can track down it, and whenever having observed It, grip to it with an urgency that drives them to a brutal, manipulative, Machiavellian way of behaving that obliterates the very relationship they try to protect. As demonstrated in the past segment, love and discipline remain inseparable, so heartless and unfeeling guardians are individuals ailing in the field. When they neglect to give their kids a feeling of being adored, they also fail to furnish them with the limit regarding self-restraint. In this way, the excessive reliance of the inactive ward people is just a vital sign of their behavioral condition. Aloof reliant individuals need discretion.

 They are reluctant or incapable of postponing satisfaction of their strive after consideration. In their distress to shape and protect connections, they toss trustworthiness to the breezes. They grip to outworn links when they ought to surrender them. Generally significant, they come up short on understanding others' expectations of themselves. They inactively focus on others, much of the time even their youngsters, as the wellspring of their bliss and full-filling, and accordingly, when they are unsettled or satisfied, they essentially feel that others are capable. Subsequently, they are perpetually furious because they unendingly feel left somewhere near other people who can never, as a general rule, satisfy every one of their necessities. I have a partner who frequently tells individuals, “Look, permitting yourself to be reliant upon someone else is the absolute worst thing you can do to yourself. You would be in an ideal situation being reliant upon heroin. However long you have a stockpile, heroin won't let you down; assuming it's there, it will constantly satisfy you. However, assuming you anticipate that someone else should fulfill you, you'll be perpetually frustrated."

 As an obvious truth, it is no mishap that the most widely recognized aggravation that aloof reliant individuals manifest past their connections to others is reliance on medications. Theirs is the "habit-forming character." They are dependent on individuals, sucking on them and eating them up, and when individuals are not free to be sucked and eaten, they frequently go to the container or the needle or the pill as a human substitute.

 Conclusion

 Dependency might seem, by all accounts, to be love since It is a power that makes individuals savagely lash themselves at each other. However, it is not love; it is anti-love. It has its origin in a parental inability to adore, and it propagates disappointment. It looks to get as objected to giving. It feeds infantilism instead of growth. It attempts to entrap and tighten instead of free. Eventually, it annihilates instead of forges connections, and it destroys as objected to constructs individuals.  To summarize, in the words of Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, “to stop all the ‘Doing’ and practicing more ‘Being’.”

 -Muhammad Faisal

  Originally published to JMWriters blog. Republished with permission.

[jmwriters]

When Memory Is Not Real

Salvador Dali once said: "The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant."

“The only thing we ever deal with is thought, and thoughts can be changed! Regardless what the situation is, it is only outer effects of inner thoughts! The power is this moment and you choose what it is!” ~Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor

Elizabeth F. Loftus, a well-known professor and researcher in the field of psychology and “the creation and nature of false memories” has shown in her research how memories can be distorted, how people can be influenced by information after an event has occurred. Her experiments involve exposing people to outside influences of suggestion after witnessing a video, and being questioned about their observations, for example.

According to an article on Businessinsider.com, Dec 19, 2017 by Lindsay Dodgson, “Neuroscientists have looked at brain scans of people having real memories and false memories to see if there's a difference. In one study from Daegu University in South Korea, 11 people were asked to read lists of words that fall into categories, like ‘farm animals.’" Then they were asked whether specific words appeared on the original lists, while functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) detected changes in blood flow to different areas of the brain.

“When study participants had confidence in their answers and were correct, blood flow increased to the hippocampus — the region of the brain that is important for memory. If they were confident in their answer but were wrong, which happened about 20% of the time, the frontoparietal region lit up — the area associated with ‘a sense of familiarity’."

Now consider how the human brain can influence memory by going over and over an event that is influenced by a high emotional response. According to Dr. Joe Dispenza, in Evolve Your Brain, “We can make thought more real than anything else.”

The way we think affects the body because every thought creates a biochemical reaction in the brain, which allows for a corresponding feeling in the body. There is a continuous cycle of thinking creating feeling and then feeling creating thinking.

 “All that you perceive is a hologram and the materialization of your thoughts,” shares Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor. “Do you like what you See? If not, change your mind.” The thoughts, vibration and frequency that you emit returns back to you an exact reflection.

Each time we “re-live” a highly charged emotional experience, we literally cause the brain to fire in the exact sequences and patterns as the original event. This firing and wiring of the brain to the past only serves to reinforce those circuits and create even more hard-wired circuits. The emotions can become even more heightened thus creating a distortion of the “memory” of actual events.

  When there is an extreme emotional charge to an event or experience in our life, and we continue to live it over and over again, recreating the same chemistry in the body-mind, there is the opportunity for distortion of the memory of that event, heightened by the memorized emotions. Because we tend to “re-live” especially traumatic events or uncomfortable or unhappy experiences from our past, those “memories” become distorted by our emotional state.

This unconscious repetition trains the body to remember that emotional state, equal to or better than the conscious mind does. When the body remembers better than the conscious mind, then the body is the mind. Our feelings become the way we think, and we can’t think greater than how we feel. At this point the body (feelings) controls the mind (thoughts).

Only 5% of who we are is conscious, and 95% of who we are is subconscious, or even unconscious. So, body-feelings is that 95 % of memorized negativity, while mind-thoughts is the 5%.

“Think of your body as the unconscious mind. It is so objective that it doesn’t know the difference between the emotions that are created from experiences in your external world and those you fabricate in your internal world by thought alone. To the body they are the same.” -Joe Dispenza, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself.

 Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor reminds us that all is energy. The "here now" that we are looking at is a series of images that we have created from our memory bank, because the physical action of looking is actually a black hole. The iris is a hole that acts as a lens. The optic nerve broadcasts electrical signals that play across our eyes like a movie on a screen. This is what we have been calling reality – past experience. Those electrical signals are pulled from our memory bank. We are not present at that moment.

The question of the accuracy of memory has more recently become of interest in the criminal justice system.  According to an article in Wired, “False memories and false confessions: the psychology of imagined crimes” Julia Shaw, a criminal psychologist at the London South Bank University, conducts research to study how false memories arise in the brain and its implications to the criminal justice system. She has found human memories to be susceptible to suggestion, malleable and “often unintentionally false.”

"False memories are everywhere," she says. "In everyday situations we don't really notice or care that they're happening. We call them mistakes, or say we misremember things." In the criminal-justice system, however, they can have severe consequences.

Elizabeth Loftus, a cognitive psychologist at the University of California, Irvine, had been studying memory for more than 20 years prior to 1990. In one of Loftus’ research studies, she concluded that "The key is suggestibility. Often, false memories develop because there's exposure to external suggestive information. Or, people can suggest things to themselves - autosuggestion. People draw inferences about what might have happened. Those solidify and act like false memories."

Joe Dispenza in Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself gives this advice: “Warning: when feelings become the means of thinking, or if we cannot think greater than how we feel, we can never change. To change is to think greater than how we feel. To change is to act greater than the familiar feelings of the memorized self.”

Thus, in order to move out of living in the past, and being boxed in by “memories” – real or unreal – is to challenge the thoughts and feelings that come with them. A vital skill that Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor teaches to help separate our thoughts from “ghosts from the past” and what’s truly our inner self, our true self, is to simply ask, “Who’s talking?”

 Ask yourself: “Is this true?” “Is this just what I’m thinking and believing while I’m experiencing these feelings?”

Rather than continuing to replay old scenarios – move beyond the “old memorized self.” Knowing that memory is more an illusion than a reality, it is possible. The act of coming to present time is absolutely vital to moving from victim to victor.

All we ever have is this moment. What we do with our emotions, memories, thoughts and actions, right now, is all that matters and is all that creates matter. ~Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor

  -DJA References: Evolve Your Brain, Joe Dispenza, DC; ©2007, Health Communications, Inc. Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself, Joe Dispenza, DC; ©2012, Hay House, Inc. https://www.businessinsider.com/science-of-false-memories-2017  Dec 19, 2017, Lindsay Dodgson https://www.psychologistworld.com/memory/false-memories-questioning-eyewitness-testimony False Memories: How false memories are created and can affect our ability to recall events. https://www.wired.co.uk/article/false-memory-syndrome-false-confessions-memories, Emma Bryce, 7-22-2017 False memories and false confessions: the psychology of imagined crimes

 This article published originally on JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.

[jmwriters]

Reflection

The sun's risen to the point that it's just above the level of my eyes and everything underneath it, is being reflected. When I say reflected that's the actual reflection like, the ocean is dancing and sparkling. I can hardly hold my eyes open because of the brilliance of it. That's in the distance then closer.

 The trees are green, but they're all reflecting, again, to even see the green, that's a reflection. It's interesting because we think naturally that the plants are using green and that's why they're green, but it's actually, that's the light waves that they're not using. That's what they're reflecting back. 

 And in essence, everything that we're seeing, is a reflection back and that's the physical scientific component of it. If we can see it, it's a reflection of those light waves bouncing off that object and into our eyes. So, I looked down to my north, which in this case is also my left and there's a Camellia tree. 

 Beautiful Camellia, large shrub, beautiful pink, pink flowers. Each of those pink petals is pink because that's what's not being absorbed by that petal. It's absorbing the blue, it's absorbing the yellow, it's absorbing all sorts of things, but not the reds. They're bouncing back to my eyes. 

 And the teachings from the elder Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha for me have always been this bridge between the scientific world and the spiritual world. And when I say spiritual, I'm not meaning religious, I’m meaning, it's almost science again. Like even when I pause to think, what does it actually mean? Having a spirit. Being a spirit, not having one, probably being a spirit and having a body would be closer to the, to how it relates for me. And the teachings through the Cherokee elder being one that have grown upon personal reflections as a child, and then others mentioning things and traveling. So many countries after I left university, and observed and really to come back home with the teachings that everything you see are a reflection. 

 And then add to that as Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha did, it's a reflection of your own thoughts. And when I say thoughts, it's your own thoughts and emotion. 

 Teaching the traditional way of storytelling. Sometimes wasn't enough for us Westerners brought up on books. So again, to be a bridge Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha encouraged the wide reading and then watching, realizing that movies are also something that can engage the emotions.

  An emotion being energy in motion, but let's go back to the books. The books include some of those that have been compiled by Dr. Joe Dispenza, where we look at our own thought patterns, beliefs, but again, not going too much into them, not going down, down into a potentially negative reflection of oneself. 

 Looking more with the options of stock change, reading the books from David Suzuki, looking at parallel worlds, reading books by professor Fred Alan Wolf, which you can also Google as Dr. Quantum. And that was the introduction of science experiments like the double slit experiment, Google that if you haven't seen it but in essence, it gives a really lovely succinct look at how a theory that our thoughts influence the behavior of the matter around us, which is another teaching where Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha again, had people, just ask themselves, “Okay, what is it about blackness? So much of what we're taught is, the darkness is the bad and the light is the good. Now that may have come about from a biological perspective, maybe the darks, when things come out and eat us, maybe the lights when we're safe and we can see everything. But traditionally to the dark, the nighttime was a time of people coming together or the introverting time looking inwards, such an important thing that for many today happens only in sleep. And sometimes that's numbed by the consumption of alcohol or other drugs prior to sleep. 

 It's for our health and wellbeing, it's a fantastic thing to have those introvert times of allowing that say the “no thing”. So, people talk about nothingness out there or the blackness is the nothingness. That's not that there's nothing there. It's a “no thing”. It's like having all the ingredients for cake and you're yet to make it. Allowing our self-time in the no thing, allows a much broader perspective of what could be.

  It's like, if you have a house and you've got to do renovations, you're still starting with what's already there. But if you have a completely clear space, you have no thing. You have far more potential in terms of what you can create. So, allowing ourselves to go to the no thing allows the opening of a broader perspective. 

 Now this could be for things we actually want to do like a physical world thing. It can also just be in perspectives. And at this time when there are unrest within self, within family groups, within relationships, within parents and adults within work groups, within countries, there is also the opposite of all of that. There are fantastic things happening, harmonious things, environmental restoration, care for displaced, wonderful breakthroughs in holistic medicines, regenerative agriculture, whatever there is, there is the opposite of, and again, Pa'Ris'Ha has spoken a lot on the opposites. And when there's something that we may I disagree with, to know that it's not about being against that thing, but to see oneself in a circle. And as the circle, there are no sides, but as the circle, there is a center point, and from the center, you can move around and look outward at all the perspectives. And from that position in the middle, having taken in as much as there as possible to look, listen, feel, Intuit, then can choose which area you want energy to flow in. Where do you want energy in motion? Where do you put your emotion? 

 So, if there's fighting and you don't want fighting, where do you put it for? Good reconciliation actions, for harmonic outcomes. 

 If there's a destruction of the environment, where do you look? To the programs that are regenerating the soil? Planting the trees? Getting the young ones involved, and put out energy in motion there? When we see that, which is opposite and we put our energy in motion to that, which is opposite our emotion, we actually add to that. It’s is a powerful thing. So powerful. And it's one that Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha said so often in so many different ways. And getting back to the beginning of what I was saying with this beautiful reflection of the sun, which is referred to by many names, including Nunda, everything out there is a reflection. Our brain reads the reflected light, the reflected sound. 

 Everything is an energy that we then listen to look at, feel, and through that we make up power outcome of what is reality. So if we take it that next stage, that even for it to be out there to be reflecting back to us, it's not a one-way flow in, as we look, as we speak, we're also creating. So if you want to be an environmental activist, speak for what you're for. I think Mother Teresa is quoted as saying “she won't go to an anti-war March, but she will go to a peace march”. It's probably many who've said that. What we stand for, is what we bring more of. And absolutely this also doesn't mean we don't take action. We don't bring things to the front that are opposite of a harmonic world that we want. We don't turn a blind eye to things, but as much as possible move to the center, when we think there's something we've been told there's something not right, move to the center. 

 Look around, gather as much perspective as possible. And then from that position, make a decision. You can take action, absolutely take action that builds that, which you're for. Whether it's removing people from a dangerous situation, it's all in alignment with that. But when you're removing people from a dangerous situation, but not because they're this race or that race or this gender or that gender, humanity is humanity. If your principle is to care for people, it's all people. So in this beautiful day, as we look out and see the reflection of everything, know, that as it reflects to us, we also reflect to it. 

 May you walk in the beauty way. 

 -MDB 

 This post originally appeared in JMWriters blog. Republished by permission

[jmwriters]

My Life Since I Met Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha

I went for an appointment with a Tibetan monk, because I had at this time articulation problems. 

He told me: “reading books is not enough, you should have a master.” 

I told him I had a few, but when I did know them better, they were not an example for me. 

He said: “a real master acts the way he teaches! That is the way you will recognize the good one.” 

 Few years later I met Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha. 

I was in a workshop with her in Québec. During those two days I felt her love, her consciousness and her wisdom. 

She is the person who walks her talk! 

I realized that I met the Master who will show me the many possibilities that the great Spirit gave to me.

 Each breath brings me to the next point. 

Listening to birdsong and let them heal my heart. 

Observing Beauty of nature and clouds showing messages. 

Welcoming the kiss of the soft wind on my cheek, hearing “you matter” 

And that 

My finger print is unique and the world needs me.

 Life is precious and short. There are so many distractions! 

I have to be aware of my choices. 

Each day, each week I keep on looking for more comprehension about humanity and the vastness I can explore. Learning is a real passion for me.

 My Elder, Grandmother is always there! Challenging me, opening my eyes and my heart. What a gift. 

Health Wealth and Happiness!! 

This is the mantra she repeats. 

Looking for Balance all the time, Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha teaches me

To be available helping humanity, to serve (while I am serving, I am in pure love and compassion, I receive as much as I give)

To spend time to improve my knowledge (How can I recognize truth with a lack of education)

To find in myself a passion and to realize it (the Medicine Wheel is a good tool to use) 

 My Elder is living this way each minute and it is the most powerful example because I know then it is possible!!! 

Everything is sacred for Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha 

She has opened many doors for me, she is the Light who illuminates my road. 

  Numerology: I know that when she recommends a book, the author can be trusted. I still have many things to integrate and I am happy because getting older gives me time to keep on my learning.

  Sciences of the brain: she introduced me to the work of Dr Joe Dispenza, which helped me in “breaking the habit of being myself.” Living in the past and focusing on my wounds doesn’t help me. Visualization and writing my story, my script; how many times Grandmother said that it was so important to journal.

  Food: a body without acidity is healthy. Sugar, tomatoes, red meat contribute in an acid body.

Eating sugar like bananas for breakfast increases the need of sugar for all day.

Benedictions. My love is in every meal I prepare.

Choosing the right ingredients, helping with my purchases the small biologic farmers.

Consciousness when I eat and how I share the food to be sure that every person gets a part.

 Clothing: choosing natural fibers to be in contact with my body altar. For me creating beauty when I get dressed is a way to respect life and all the people I’ll meet in my day.

 I had the privilege to travel with Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha. 

I learned a lot about love in a couple. With a great simplicity she shared with us her personal experiences and what she picked up in observing people with the eyes of the heart. 

Last week I used what I learned with her advising my grand-daughter. She was at a turning point with her boyfriend; they want to live together now and she was afraid of making a lifetime decision! 

I told her some native people make commitments for one year at the time. Each year the couple review what was positive in the past year and what is to improve for next year. Bingo!  Now she gets the tool! She was so happy! When I lift myself I lift up others! 

 I am so grateful to be part of Grandmother’s life. 

Since I was very young, I dreamed to be born as a native girl, the reality is that my Elder bathes my soul in her Cherokee wisdom. 

As far as I can remember spirituality and intuition were so important for me. But not prayers like a parrot!

 I once asked a priest why he was saying the same words each mass, I didn’t get any answer just big eyes from my teacher. 

The problem when you like to laugh and have fun, people around you get surprised when you talk about healing you can generate in a group by focusing on Love. In group there is the circle.

 The power of the Circle. Each one having the right place. Connecting with the ancients that used the order and this circle to resolve and listen to everyone. 

I see that in this time of chaos the talking circle would help humanity to respect the one facing him.

  Let me share you a moment I had. 

I was in Ohio for a Sun ceremony for the first time. Stretching my mind was the beginning. 

How many hardwired thoughts did I have? 

The huge need in sleeping hours, the need of coffee and food at regular time, all this became useless. 

There was a ritual to prepare, a time to respect and I was able to extend my consciousness traveling on Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha wings. 

Each task was important. Working in group and consciousness. I saw how fast a disagreement between two persons didn’t last long. To be in the present moment, letting go the past. 

The kids 

When kids are four years old in native tradition, they have to bring food on the table and participate. I noticed how mature each child was, Grandmother was taking time to educate them, asking everyone to include them in the work so they learn to participate and find their skills. 

When the daily life brings me teachings my cells always remember the lesson.   Some people had to find boxes with vegetarian food, let’s say 40 meals. All day long they were phoning everywhere around even 200 miles away from where we all gathered without result. 

At the end of the afternoon, Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha talked to the two persons and told them. You were so sure that you won’t succeed that you didn’t get what you were looking for. The power of the intention, creating our reality.

 The lesson if I do want to succeed: I have to get a clear intention and listen the inner voice who guides me in this fantastic Life.

 Beauty is all around.

 -MG

 This post originally appeared in JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.

[jmwriters]

Needing God In Early Stages of Motherhood

There are many parts of Nancy Ortberg’s book that I have heard directly from Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha.  So, reading Nancy Ortberg’s book “Looking for God” I would like to share some of her stories. She shares how she had a problem with morning quiet time. The first 30 minutes of each morning that she was to be silent in meditation with God and later share any insights gained during this time. And if she missed this daily quiet time, she was filled with guilt for having done so. There came a point in her life where it was truly impossible for her to find that 30 minutes each morning of quiet time with God. In fact, never was there a more oxymoronic phrase to her than quiet time. In those days she had to fight to go to the bathroom by herself, and when she did make it there alone, one or both kids were always on the other side of the door, pounding and calling to her. 

 “Mommy, can we come in?”

“No.”

“Mommy, when are you coming out?”

“In a minute.”

“Mommy, is a minute up yet?”

She had never known what it was like to wake up tired, treating ear infections and teething. Her nights became staccato notes of sleep. When she did wake up, the kids were either crying to be fed or unrolling toilet paper from the bathroom down the hall and wrapping the cat. 

 Days and weeks would go by before she had any quiet time to “talk to God.” When she did open the Bible to read, she either lost her train of thought or fell asleep! She began to panic. In this early stage of motherhood, she desperately needed God but was unable to connect how she thought she should. She began to figure she would plan to either meet God again in about six years when all the kids would be in school or find other ways to connect with God but she did not know any other ways. But God did.

 She was feeling about 12 months pregnant and her other two children were growing fussier as the day went on. She was exhausted. So, she gathered the children in the car and headed towards the park, a perfect place for them to run off steam before dinner. As they played, she sat down on a park bench and watched them. God’s plan was to show her a window. 

 Her children dug in the sand, skipped around trying to catch the ducks and the warmth of the sun soothed them all as it silhouetted their redheaded profiles. She sat watching, relaxed and suddenly it dawned on her with great impact how very deeply she loved her children, in an unexpected visceral response. She felt her heart bursting with love for them, so much so that she fought back tears and her throat tightened with such overwhelming deep emotions and love for her children.

 Simultaneously, God chose this moment to send a tsunami that absolutely blindsided her. She heard God whisper to her “And that’s just the tip of the iceberg as to how much I love you.” God had used this moment when she was open to overwhelm and break through that coating with what her heart needed and that it was just a peek, nowhere near the fullness of God’s love.

 Ephesians 3:18 Paul said he prayed that they might have the power to understand just how wide, how long, how high, and how deep God’s love is. 

 The encounter she had on that park bench went beyond any experience she had ever had during a quiet time. God began to show her there were so many ways to deepen her relationship with God, to know and experience God and the park bench counted as much as the quest time did. 

 She climbed out of her boxed view and widened her perspective of experiencing God whom she began to realize was present all throughout her day; she only needed to pay attention. So, she began to have quiet times all over the place! Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has often asked “where is God Not?”

 She makes the analogy of referring the Les Misérables’s when Jean Valjean, near death, sings to his adopted daughter, Cosette, “to love another person is to see the face of God.” This struck such a deep chord within her, that she wondered why that phrase had never been in the Bible. Only to have her husband come to her one day, opening the Bible to Genesis 33:10 and read to her the words of Jacob, reunited with Esau after such a long time: “For to see your face is like seeing the face of God.” From that time, whenever I looked into the face of a dear friend, that became my quiet time, as looking into the face of God.

 She also began to appreciate things more in her life; for example, a good meal that she did not have to cook. Steve Evans, a noted Christian philosopher, says that perhaps the best proof for the existence of God is banana cream pie and she thought he was onto something. She deeply reflected on the good nature of God and what it means to “taste and see that the Lord is good.” Psalm 34.8.

 What a joy it was for her to realize that from the first moment she awoke in the morning to when she closed her eyes at night, we have been given a variety of ways to connect with God. Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has shared with us with each new day “I am again reborn to the Great Earth Mother…” For instance, in traveling on vacation, they came upon a magnificent scenic view at Yosemite. People intuitively were whispering as if it were sacred ground. Everyone was in awe as they witnessed what can happen with a wave of God’s hand, like a stroke of a paint brush. The magnificence of creation and the breathtaking beauty of God, whose spirit is within each of us. All this to her was a quiet time and it counts.

 So, I would like to ask you, when have you looked into the eyes and face of God? I remember looking at a newborn baby and exclaimed, I’m looking at the face of God. Another time, I was a volunteer with severely disabled adults and children. They had no control of their throat muscles so I was holding them in my lap as I poured the liquid food down their throat bit by bit. Our eyes connected and mine filled with tears as my heart burst open. I knew I was looking into the eyes of God. I encourage you to look into the mirror at your reflection and view yourself looking into the eyes of God, within each of us. I have adopted in my life the powerful statement of Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha teachings which say, ‘Of myself I am a No Thing Of my God I am All things.”

 Nancy continues in her book that her friend had given birth to a little girl. As she gazed at her, she was overwhelmed by this gift. With tears in her eyes and a heart overflowing, her response was simple gratitude. It was a prayer whispered to God from a full heart that had just been filled even more. She couldn’t believe there was room for more and she was filled with appreciation. 

 Nancy contends the power of gratitude is both breathtaking and centering. She compares it to the lines of nuclear power, making our lives richer and freer … a direct link to the goodness of God, an unending source of hope and power and faith. Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha has demonstrated for us over and over that through broadcasting appreciation there is an energy that grows. God is in the everyday ordinary as well as extraordinary magnificence of everyday life. As she watched a magnificent sunset at Malibu beach with a group of people, she says they all stood there quietly, as if they had purchased a ticket to a show and were watching this grand display. She wanted to shout, “You are watching God! You are attendees of one of God’s many shows that give clues to God’s goodness. This sacred world.”

 She shares a similar sensation when she and her family joined a group of others to view the Mavericks, the biggest waves in the world that hit 30 to 50 feet and the dream of many experienced surfers. They watched with a sort of reverence. They mostly whispered, although no one told them to. It was as if, for that moment, they were on holy ground. Because they were.

 Gratitude is a powerful force. She relates it to a power that occurs when someone who is facing deep difficulties expresses an authentic and profound gratitude. She had been a nurse and was attending a 14-year-old girl who had her leg amputated just below the knee. The girl lifted her amputated leg up above the bubbling water for her to see and said, “Look at how much I have left!” She explained that since the doctors were able to amputate below the knee it was much easier to fit a prosthesis and she wondered how long it would take to heal so she could get started with that. 

 This made her realize our gratitude and appreciation are ways in which we worship God. Hebrews 12:28 says “Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful and so worship God.” 

 Jesus acknowledged that gratitude was a way to praise God. In Luke 17:11-19, Jesus cured 10 lepers and 9 went on their way and only 1 of the ten came and threw himself at the feet of Jesus to give thanks before going on his way. Jesus commended his reaction and Luke made sure this was written down so we don’t forget to be grateful.

 She shares another time when she was in an airplane at night. The sky was dark and the captain’s voice announced to look out the window to see the Northern Lights. She describes it as thick bands of neon green lights dancing and rippling through the dark sky, like gossamer ribbons strung from the top of the universe, swaying back and forth for their entertainment. Absolutely magnificent. Everyone looked on in amazement with hushed tones. She recognized a laughing, whimsical God, a creative and interactive God who, in creating this wonderful world, decided that when solar particles interact with the earth’s magnetic field, they might as well give us a show. So, wherever we are throughout the days of our lives, we will see things that cause our hearts to well with gratitude if we allow it. We can see God everywhere. All we must do, she says, is to connect the dots. Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha included in her morning prayer, “May my eyes rest upon 1,000 beautiful things and may my hands touch 100 sacred objects.”  

 -PC 

 Published 5-3-2022 in JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.

[jmwriters]

My Favorite and Best Teacher!

Here is a little bit of my spiritual life adventure. I am sharing about a teacher who is very inspiring. She has inspired me and thousands of others, and still does! We need, in our life, to have good examples of people we respect and we admire for who they are or what they do. Could be anyone, a family member, a friend, a teacher, nature, or an animal companion. Everything inspires us, some more than others, but all make a difference and this is how we grow. We help each other by sharing ourselves.

 ....When I think of my life now I can’t help realizing the progress that I have made in many facets of my life. 

 When I met Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha (Grandmother is a term of respect and endearment in the native community, for a special teacher), on the outside everything looked great, but inwardly it was far from being the same. I was always interested in understanding who I was and what I was doing here. So, I did quite a bit of reading on psychological, metaphysical and scientific studies, and took several courses. All this to be able to develop myself more and be able to really see and hear and connect with who I was. It still did not quite help fill up that hole, that emptiness that was inside. God was always with me, but I was not always with God. When I discovered yoga and the Buddhist culture (not a religion – more a way to be aware and able to control your mind) it helped me. I remember thinking “Finally people talking a language that my spirit responds to”.  I even became a yoga teacher in order be able to relax enough to at least feel life more through my senses, which were quite numb. Being born in our society is not always an easy task and like everyone else I had a lot of wounds and psychological handicaps that I was not aware of or had been very successful at burying deeply inside.

 At one point one of our mutual friends which was a part of our meditation group, talked about how her sister had met this very interesting lady called Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha. She explained about some of exciting workshops that her sister had taken with her.

 We organized to meet “Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha” and we were enough in numbers for her to come to Montreal and do a week-end workshop for us. These special two days shared with Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha were most enlightening.  I never had met before someone who was so transparent and very to the point. All her teachings were very simple and very logical and it was steering something inside, a truth, something I could not deny.  As a motivational speaker, Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha uses science also (Quantum physics) so we can have a bigger picture. When she teaches, you know, you can tell that it has all been done, practiced, experienced, and lived.  Her teachings are true gems of wisdom, not just words.  She lives and applies in her everyday life every bit of what she teaches you. She walks her talk. This is what gives her so much authority.

 Today I can truly say that I have never met anybody that gives so much of themselves. She is constantly giving. She is the most generous and loving person I have ever met. She has helped and is constantly helping a huge amount of people and making a huge difference in their life. Either by giving generously and endlessly so they could be educated or fed, either by sharing all the tools that she acquired (she’s very well educated in many fields of the mind and the spirit) or being there when there is a need, distributing blankets, food and so much more. 

 Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha is a teacher of the heart and she helps you understand yourself better as a growing human being, by sharing her love, values and the beauty of her spiritual upbringing which is very inspiring. “We are spirits learning to be humans” and not the opposite as she says. But in the same time she will teach you scientifically about the brain and its functions so you have a broader picture of who you are. If there is any problem somewhere, you better be sure that she will be there helping in any way she can. Grandmother is very modest about all that she does.

 She mostly wants to help people develop their full potential so they can live a full life and in return be able to make a difference. She is a natural healer and her presence is very soothing, comforting and uplifting.   Pa’Ris’Ha is real and well balanced. She is an extremely intelligent and very polished business woman and very successful at it, and always from the heart. The wonderful part about her is that she will share all her successes with you and teach you all you need to know to do the same. But most of all, she is always helping people in need, no matter what it take physically, emotionally, spiritually. She is a woman that sincerely wants the world to be a better place, and she does not only talk about it, she acts upon it. She is a blessing to us all.  

 In all the years that I have studied with Grandmother, I have acquired tools that have truly helped me go through some very intense life’s crises and come out of it better than I was.  Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha teaches you to be strong and walk on your own two feet, materially as well as emotionally. If she sees that you start depending too much on her, she disappears. The term “Grandmother” says it all.  As I mentioned earlier, it is an endearing way to describe someone who you trust and respect and who will help you grow and develop your full potential. Just watching her is a teaching. If I can achieve even a parcel of what she’s achieving spiritually and materially on a regular basis, I can say that I would be very fulfilled and satisfied. It is important to have a person like Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha in your life. It is the best incentive to succeed that you’ll ever have, because she truly is with you every step of the way.  She really embodies Love, Compassion and Generosity.

 The good part is that we are all teachers and students. We all matter and have a unique message to share with the world. If we don’t, who will?  This could be simply being who you are. Simplicity is the way of life. Nature in its beauty and deeply healing energy, is very simple. No pretense, no fear, just a constant display of love and beauty. 

 Trust yourself, love and appreciate who you are. You are as unique as your fingerprints! 

 By BM

 This post originally appeared in JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.

[jmwriters]

Sharing an “Aha!” Moment…

It was 10:35 am this morning and I had just finished a half-hour conference call I’m on every morning with other businesswomen from around the country.  It’s a combination coaching, accountability and prayer call. I love it! 

But I’ve been feeling frustrated lately – even though I’ve been doing all the right things as far as “filling my pipeline” (making new sales contacts) and reviewing my goals each morning and night; following other “success tenants” – because I’m still not seeing results. 

There’s a “Slight Edge” Principle that says if you do just a few things consistently – every single day – that effort will compound over time and produce results. 

But there’s a period of “doing the do” that you have to put in before you start to see the measured results come back to you. That’s where I’m at – in the middle of the new course of action.

My mentor and Elder, Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor, reminds us, it usually takes 90 days to show results…and A LOT of people quit before they reach that point of return. 

So, when I got off the call, even though I love the energy and the camaraderie and the coaching, I was feeling restless. I’ve been feeling restless for a while now. 

I began pacing rapidly back and forth between my kitchen and living room – which in a one-bedroom apartment is NOT a very large space! 

I often pace. I pace to think. I pace to pace. I pace to calm down. I pace to ramp up. It helps me expend energy. I pace. 

I started talking aloud (as I often talk to myself). 

“Restless,” I kept repeating aloud,” restless in mind…restless in body…restless in spirit… restless in soul…”

I stopped dead in my tracks and looked at the manual treadmill standing in the middle of my dining-living room.  “Well,” I thought, “if I’m going to do this furious pacing thing I might as well turn it into exercise and get on my treadmill!” 

So, I put on a lecture by Dr. Joe Dispenza, the author of “Evolve Your Brain – The Science of Changing Your Mind” and his, at that time, newest release, “Breaking The Habit of Being Yourself: How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One.” 

At first, I had it on my computer speakers, but I couldn’t really hear it over the noise of the manual treadmill belt. So, I donned my mp3 player and earplugs and mounted my treadmill for a workout – physical and mental.

I started hearing little snippets of wisdom in-between my conscious readings from the display in front of me…watching and mentally logging numbers of “how far, how many calories, how fast,” etc. 

I went for a quarter mile and it felt really good – especially considering I am still dealing with a tear of the medial meniscus from a work-related injury that’s all tied up in Workman’s Comp hearings! (Part of my sense of frustration). 

I look a lot like Frankenstein when I walk – still – but part of my restlessness comes from knowing that I’ve been stuck too long in “injury mode.”  I realized that I need to get on with healing my leg. I followed my “walk” with some modified lifting of weights (arms) and stationary punches (I’ve REALLY missed my Tae-bo Gold Routine!).

 All the while I was listening to Dr. Joe’s lecture – one that I have been listening to repeatedly lately. When I finished my physical exercise, I felt really good. “Exercise” had been on my days’ list of accomplishments that I had written out the night before. It felt good to have that already done. 

Then I sat down and started to write. He was talking about addictions and personality – about how 95% of who we are is acquired from the influences of others, which I know from previous studies with Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor. 

Then I got really excited when Dr. Joe started talking about habits – and the definition of a habit as “when the body is the mind.” 

When we feel stuck – we have to look at “what have we memorized?” What feelings and experiences have we cemented in – even though we may say we want to change? If we’re not changing it’s because we’ve hard-wired past body-mind programs which then become habits. 

If we memorize (hard-wire) an emotional reaction and stay there for a few days – it becomes a “mood.”  If we prolong it further it becomes our “temperament.”  Over a prolonged period of time that temperament – “living by the same emotional reaction” over and over again turns into a personality trait – which means we’re totally living in the PAST! 

THAT was my “AHA!” MOMENT!

 Recovery Programs refer to a person’s “defects of character.”  I’ve always maintained that I am NOT defective. I am a child of God and God doesn’t make junk! 

BUT then I made the connection to what Dr. Joe is talking about…and realized that the “defect” is the faulty emotional reaction that has been hard-wired in our brain based on a past experience that we haven’t been able to free ourselves from. Why? 

All emotions produce chemicals in our bodies and in the brain. We can become addicted to those chemicals in the same way we can become addicted to alcohol or other drugs, food, or gambling, or sex, or any destructive behavior. 

We try to change but we hit a wall because, as Dr. Joe describes it, “I can’t go beyond this emotion because the chemicals are so addictive.” 

We can’t go beyond the emotion because someone or something knocks us so far out of balance as to prevent us from being able to make our way back. 

That’s living in the past. What is it that we have to do in order to live happy and free? 

CLEAR AWAY THE WRECKAGE OF THE PAST!

 I have had the privilege of working with recovering alcoholics for over 40 years. One of the greatest pitfalls I have seen is the seeming inability to let go of the guilt and shame of their past. Recovering alcoholic/addicts are told to remember their last drunk/usage – so that they don’t return to using. But that means the individual is keeping that experience alive by constantly repeating it. Thus, staying mired in that past that they are trying to resolve and move forward from! 

Besides, there is scientific evidence that “memory” is not so much a function of recall, as it is a function of the mind filling in a story, in order to accommodate the emotions, we’ve memorized. 

So, to keep “re-living” a past occurrence in order to avoid that same mistake in the future is a basic fallacy, because the brain is making up a “greater than” trauma with each recollection. 

That begins to trap us, and we find ourselves living in a past that didn’t actually happen (at least to the severity that we tend to remember it.) 

We don’t have to DWELL in the past to learn from it. In fact, we can’t afford to.

 Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor teaches us that we only have THIS MOMENT.  She reminds us that “Energy follows thought” If we’re focused on the past, we’re living in the past. 

In order to liberate ourselves, we MUST Let It GO. 

This is true for ALL of us – because our habits are hard-wired memorized emotional reactions from past experiences that no longer serve us except that we’ve become addicted to the chemicals produced by them. (And then we wonder why we keep repeating the same behavior over and over again, even though we set goals and swear off, or swear on – determined to change, yet we don’t).

 Dr. Joe asks, “What emotion have you memorized – that you’re living by day after day – that you think is you? That’s not who you are…that emotion is just a record of your past experience.” 

So, what are “defects of character?” Memorized emotions that we think are us. 

But they aren’t us – they aren’t who we are – they are what we are holding onto. 

 So, whatever “dark secret” we may be carrying around with us, whatever horrible atrocity we think we’ve committed, Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor reminds us that we are loved! 

I like to say we are not bad people trying to get better – we are good people who have gotten off course. 

If anything can be called “defective” – it’s our memory of past events – of what we are holding onto – and that can be changed. 

It’s a choice. 

 Every Day is a New Life

One of the greatest examples of intelligent and courageous living I’ve learned in my association with Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor, simply stated, is she greets each new day as a new life. Really. 

 That means not carrying forward any judgement, any drama…a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g…from the previous day’s interaction with an individual. Ever try that? It’s no small feat! 

 I don’t know that I’ve honestly been able to accomplish that yet. I try – but it takes a lot of practice to just wipe the slate clean from the day before and give a person the clear opportunity to be a different, better person. 

 Some might judge that as being weak, but I have witnessed time and time again, a power that has come with that practice that I am in awe of and am continually amazed.

 Some time ago I found myself in a situation of coming into contact daily with an individual who had determined that I am some kind of “mortal enemy” that has to be destroyed! Let me tell you, looking into those eyes wasn’t easy!

 But to do so having released all thoughts, judgement, and conclusions from the day before, coming into contact with her with no carryover? I was at the “watch my back” phase of development for quite some time. But, as I constantly had to remind myself, I can always strive to practice “A New Day, A New Life.”

 After all, it’s in the intention of creating a new behavior, forming new neural nets, or “re-wiring” as they say in Brain Science these days, that the seeds of achieving that change exist.

 By being consciously aware of the desire to change, I am one step closer to breaking those old patterns and forming new ones.  “Creating new neuron networks.”

 Until I was able to achieve that separation from a sense of injury, distrust, etc., I would smile, look her in the eye, and strive to remember that she is a child of God, as am I.

 -DJA

 Originally published on JMWriters Blog. Republished with permission.

[jmwriters]

50% divorced - I’m Not Going To Be Like That

A Young Person’s view on what’s needed to break the cycle. 

 Sharing a house in Bronte in the Eastern suburb of Sydney. What’s fun was life was interesting, was sharing all good things. And finally, one of my good friends from there came to stay over the weekend with her very much grown children now like 16, 15 and 9 years of age and like myself and actually all four of us females in our early twenties at the time were living together with a couple of other guys who had different people share the fifth room, nice big five-bedroom house in Bronte. And all of us are not with the fathers of our children and we're all quite happy or do fine. So today, mostly neutral relationships, not necessarily for her. It's still pre-mid-divorce and there's still lots of angst to some of the conversation, it was around that, and around acknowledging the pain and the frustration, and then moving through, what does the next phase look like?

 And her daughter who's very, very competent young woman, just amazing, really to listen to. That’s a 16-year-old. She said, “Well, given that 50% of people (when we say people, let's just say in NSW, that's a stat that we know is correct) 50% of marriages end in divorce.” She said, well, “If the children learn by seeing what their parents did, that didn't keep them together, and they did differently. It'd be interesting to see the statistics of when these children grow up like her generation”, because as she said, she’d be thinking to do things differently from her parents. So, it wouldn't repeat the same mistake. And I shared that I too grew up in a house where alcohol, violence... See, I keep going to downplay it and say, well, isn't it really that violent. It was okay. There was a lot of fighting. There's physical fighting between my mum and dad. And even if it wasn't s lot, it stood out enough that it was definitely a thing. And when it wasn't actually happening, there was the suspense that it may happen at any time.

 So, there was the need to sort of feel on guard. So, the adrenals were ready at a young age and watching for signs that you get used to, “if this happens and that happens”, it's more likely to be outburst. And that's the biochemistry that I was creating in my body as a young child. And then I had a number of boyfriends, mostly quite long-term, couple of years each, and the ones that weren't so long, short term were the ones I said were boring.

 And it was only years later. My Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha suggest one of the many books she’s suggested, and movies was “What the bleep do we know?” Now that's been around quite a while now, seems quite simple. It was a number of scientists or what other people were saying, pseudo scientists, ‘cause they had spirit and the other parts in them, but absolutely real science in there as well.

 And one of the key parts was chemical addiction to emotion and that Cherokee and many others who have learnt from, know that this is a thing and have tools and techniques to work with the young people and with older people, with anyone, when there's a pattern that's there to allow the person to reflect and release and see those patterns for themselves.

 And this part of chemical addiction to emotion, when I realized it, I was like “Oh wow…” I didn't really have words for it. It's just, you feel it. There's a feeling in the body of when you have one of those aha moments of your own. And a quick aside, reminds me of another

teaching Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha where we see butterflies and that's often associated with transformation. Yes, the caterpillar goes into the cocoon. It undergoes an amazing transformation. It pushes through resistance to come out. That's all teachings. Another teaching, which I found really interesting was the one that's termed “don't steal another person's thunder.” And that is their aha moment because when someone gets to realize something for themselves, it really is like thunder. There is a change inside their biochemistry. And if you put brainwave sensors on it, quite often, it would show that there's a registering of what's gamma brainwaves. Now you don't necessarily need to know what that means right now, except so the concept isn't strange to you, it means like really high frequency. So, there’s really something's happening here. It's like, “wow”. So, these waves like your brain, you just know brainwaves (people talk about brainwaves all the time). There's certain brainwaves when you're awake, like beta, you're looking out, you're really active to the outside world. And there's brainwaves when you start to go to sleep, you can say Delta, you can say different sets of brainwaves are associated with different types of thinking or activities like deep sleep, meditation, completely awake, very alert. So, these gamma ones are the ones that are sort of off the Richter of normal behavior, normal thinking, normal sleeping. And it's the aha moment. So not stealing someone else's thunder, it means allow them to have that aha moment. And from a biochemical perspective, there are lots of reasons for that. It has effect more than you telling somebody so much more than ever what you say to someone, unless what you've said creates the aha moment. 

 And in traditional ways, and in many good therapist's ways as well, the power is in asking the questions, rather than telling. So, if you ask questions, and a person is able to answer such that they hear themselves, and they have that ability to go, “Aha.”  That's a true healing way. So back to our chemical addiction to emotion, not stealing thunder would mean, at that point where you're going through a realization, you allow the person to go through it. So, you don't jump ahead and say, “Yeah, that's right.”, “That's why you'd be feeling like this.”, or “You would have that.” or specially to put it on somebody to say, “You are thinking like this”, or “You are feeling like that.” So, allow them to have their thunder and their aha moment.

 And back to the story, in the process of then sharing my story, I was able to say that there was a point when I watched that movie. And the aha moment, there was a visual in there, where the woman (she was actually a sex addict) and she was telling her cells, to her body, was saying “Yeah, let's go out and find somebody.” And it was a bit confronting in that because my conservative upbringing was like, “Whoa, that's not what females do.” That's a different aha moment to look at that conditioning. But it was that she was then talking to her cells in her body and saying, “No, we're not doing that today”. And I then realized at the time I was working in local government and at 3 o'clock, I'd start to feel like a cherry ripe. That's a little chocolate, very artificial middles, dark chocolate on the outside, sugar, the whole bit. Only small, about three centimeters or little over an inch long. And somehow, I justified that it was good because they were in there as fundraisers. So, you'd put in your 50 cents or $2 or whatever you put in, and took your little chocolate and went back to your desk.

 And I realized that was more accurate than any clock that I had. My body would say, “This is the time for that particular set of chocolates and everything that came with the dopamine hit the whole lot. So that had become a routine addiction. And having watched the movie, I was then able to say to my cells, “No, we're not doing that anymore.”

 And I'm in control. And this brought back the teachings of Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha of whose talking. There are so many script lines in there in our head. So many voices that seem logical when they come up to let you know, well, actually the little bit of sugar now, will this, or it's got coconut in it, or it raises money for other things for the lion's club.

 You could start one. It's not a new moon today, you might as well just start next Wednesday, because that’s new moon, that's a good time to start. Who is talking, whose script is that? Because, my real feeling (when I say me, I could be talking about the essence of myself that thinks of the future) what do I want to feel like, look like, do like, be like right now, therefore, what are the steps I need to take?

 And that included not having chocolate every day, not having the sugar highs and lows, not having my body telling me what the next action was. So, from that perspective, I was able to say, who's talking and who's talking was the body and the cells, because they'd been conditioned to that particular chocolate. Now, did just telling them once fix it? No, many times over a number of weeks until I didn't even have that feeling anymore.

 Now, why did it take weeks? Actually, from a biological perspective, it can take three months. So, if you imagine a cell and it has a membrane, so it has a little packet, a little skin on the outside, and then it has the DNA or the information on the inside, that DNA on the inside is what then creates the messages that go around the body, like it will create this protein or create that one, or it will send a message to a particular gland that will then say produce this hormone, or this feeling, so incredibly fast. Another recommendation is to look into your biochemistry of your body and how it works. Just choose one piece, choose how a kidney works or have a look how the happiness or the dopamine gets released when you have chocolate or when you finish a project that you've been delaying, they will do it. But again, back to the story, there's that ability then to have the cell membrane influence the DNA.

 Now how it does that. And Bruce Lipton describes this beautifully. So, I look up Bruce Lipton as well. He's a scientist. He does a lot in the biology. He's worked with some of the original work of that person I mentioned, Candace Pert, who did the book, biology of belief. And Bruce points out it's a brain membrane and think of that word brain in there, because the cell membrane has these little doors all over it and the doors, some of them are just open all the time. Things come in and out. Some of them have specific keys that needs to be unlocked to let that particular substance in. So, the cell membrane is full of doors. As we said, some open, some with keys. What gets in and out of the membrane is what then triggers the DNA what to create. Now, if we think of the DNA quickly as a massive recipe book, there are so many, many, many proteins, so many, many substances that can get made from the different combinations of the ingredients that we have. And it's the DNA as the recipe book that says, put one of these with one of those, and then one of these with one of those, and then they get matched up with the ingredients that are there.

 So, we have this huge recipe book. Usually, we only go to a couple of pages, like in many families, if you usually cook lasagna, nachos, fried rice, a mix of standard food, you're probably more likely going to go to those pages over and over again. And the more you go to those pages, some of them wear out a bit. That's another story. Listen to some of Bruce's information for that. 

 So, we've got this recipe book, now who's the, who's the chef that chooses what page of the recipe book? While it's quite often that little bit of information that comes through the door of the membrane. So, if you have, for example, a whole lot of information that says we are now low on dopamine, the one that makes you feel happy - then what is it actually saying something is low or high? Now you may know that the body has different chemicals, different substances, different particles, all through it. That's again, part of how we feel, part of how we work. For example, if we've eaten sugar, the work through our pancreas and many other, it's not that simple, but many, many pieces of information through the body to then release the insulin, which is a substance, which helps convert that sugar to glucose. And when we're low on sugar, we also have a process that helps convert the sugar that's been stored back into blood sugar. So, we have a blood sugar level that you would have heard of people talking about blood sugar level. That's meant to be at a certain amount and the body regulates if it's got too low, they'll unpack some of the stored and put it back in. If it's too high, they'll pack some up and take it out. So that's happening all the time. And when you really see how influential it can be to not have that in place - I've got friends who are diabetics, and it's really interesting to see what happens when the levels get too low or too high, obviously. They have medication and things to make sure they're safe. - You can see when it's borderline and they let you know. So that's happening all the time, but it's not just the sugar. Everything else has levels. So, our body knows some biological levels that are within the realms, how the body works safely, but then there's also ones that we create an example for those who crave of smoking. Now, whether you've smoked or not, or know someone who's smoked or not, I call it around here. There's so few people that smoke these days. Whereas when I was growing up, it was so normal. Even our house had this haze where if you went the bottom meter of the laundry room, didn't have the smoke. And then from there, there was a clear blue line. And from there it was all this blue smoke that hung in the air.

 So, nicotine, the addiction to it. 

There's a time then when that cell membrane that we talked about with all the doors and the keys, the cell membrane has a little doorway with a lock that says, this is the one for nicotine. Now the cell membrane is very accommodating. It's like having a house and whatever people are on the outside of that house, if each different sort of person had to come in a different door, they want to make sure that everyone is able to get into the house.

 So, if some people need a certain type of door, and different people need a different type of door, they make more doors. If you've got more nicotine sitting outside the cell, the cell will realize this, there's more on the outside of the membrane than the inside, and that they need to make more receptor sites to be more welcoming for that substance to come in.

 There's not an override that says this is not healthy for you. Therefore, we will not make more receptor sites. Self-determinism is so high that there is complete allowance to choose. That's another story. When you work with traditional peoples or even some therapists, there isn't an acknowledgement that there was a time well back in our creation of this physical form, that self-determinism was included there for the detriment or the betterment of a person.

 So, if we feel like something, like a cigarette, like an ice cream, like anything that we at other times with logically say that's not in alignment with my body's best interest and believe me, sometimes the cigarette might be in someone's best interest and ice cream at sometimes might be in someone's best interest.

 Please know that I'm not saying these things are good or bad, but it's, “who's talking”, as Pa'Ris'Ha said, “ask who's talking”. So, if it's the body that now has so many of these little doorways to nicotine, and if this nicotine has started to reduce in level, because someone's made that conscious decision to reduce their nicotine intake, or their sugar intake, or their salt intake, or their anger intake (now, let's get back to that one after), it'll have doors with nobody coming through it, and it will say, “Hey, something's gone wrong”. We had all these doors ready, and now it's not there. Let's send a message up to the brain that this particular substance isn't coming through the door anymore. So, we need more.

 So, then the cells send information to the brain to say, “Hey, we're low on nicotine.” And this is really where the who's talking comes in. So, the body then can make up wonderful scenarios. Here's a quick example from mine. I finished the science degree, we had an honors year where you do research and write a thesis, obviously that has a timeline in which to do it. When you get to the end, that timeline can feel very compressed. I was sleeping little. Spending long nights, moved in to live on campus so I only had to work from walk from the biology building over to the campus, sleep a little, 8 in the morning, start working again. There was a lot of adrenaline associated in those last days, weeks, actually. Now I remember at one time thinking, when I've handed this thesis in, I am just going to feel amazing.

 The reality, I handed the thesis in and I'd have a normal day or good. Didn't quite feel amazing, but it felt good. But then I'd go to bed at night. And my mind, this is the who's talking, the body cells, I realized later the benefit of hindsight, the body cells were saying to me. We made all these receptor sites for adrenaline and we're not getting enough. And all of a sudden, before I knew it, my body had created a scenario where my mind was playing a video of a little dog running out onto the road, just like in the little shopping complex area, near where I live and there's cars everywhere. And I'd be like, and I'd have a hit of adrenaline.

 I'd be like, why am I having these (not even dreams) I wasn't even asleep. Why am I having these? I didn't know the information then of chemical addiction to emotion.

 After some time when I did know, I was then able to say to my cells, I appreciate that you created the adrenaline. I appreciate that was the right thing that got us through, that particular set of life called finishing the thesis. We, including every wonderful cell in my body, we, do not need to do that anymore.

 And even that felt like, whoa, so now who's talking, I'm talking, I am the commander of these trillions of cells and it's like “oh, okay, we don't need to do that anymore”. A little bit of a lag time. It's still there, but it didn't have the same intensity. Because I realized what was going on, and soon the visualizations would stop. Same with the nicotine and the person when they realize that this story is the cells on the membrane.

 And then one might say, “when's it gonna stop?” If you've heard that little thing of, they say 3 minutes, 3 hours, 3 days, 3 weeks. The 3 months that things seem to come around quite a lot in terms of giving up addictions, and from a biological perspective in 3 months, very many of your cells - depends which cells, because they all have turnover times at different rates, like your red blood cells, turnover really fast, your white blood cells last longer, your brain cells longer, again, the inside - the cells in your stomach lining they're replaced every single day. So, on average, the cells that are being used in these communications of what's present, and what's not, what's going inside and outside of the cell, what is the DNA being triggered to create the page of this wonderful recipe book are we are opening, to create molecules that are going to pass out of the cell into the bloodstream and have effect on our thoughts, our emotions, our physicality. Those cells, enough of them, within three months, we'll have become new that if that particular thing as we go back to the nicotine, if the nicotine is no longer floating around outside them, they're not hanging around at the door waiting to get in. When that cell divides, when I say a new cell, if you imagine one cell, what happens first is all of the recipe book gets transcribed. So now we have two recipe books, and that's our DNA doubling itself up. In theory, perfectly, we don't want to change our recipes they've got to be exact. The DNA doubles itself up, creates two nucleuses. So that's basically the kitchen where the recipe book is held. So, we have a nucleus, being the kitchen, inside is the DNA, which is a recipe book. It has been beautifully copied so that now we have two copies of the recipe book and indeed two kitchens. Once we have that, then the cell membrane starts to pinch in a little bit like a figure 8 with one kitchen or one nucleus in each side. And that pinches right in, and becomes two cells. But unlike the recipe books that get copied meticulously, the cell membrane - it's a bit of an effort for benefit - if something's not being used, when it divides - so when you get the membrane breaking into two, it's not going to make a whole lot of extra doorways for nicotine to come in. If there hasn't been much nicotine coming in the door, that's a wasted effort. So, this time around, it creates fewer doorways for nicotine.

 So, each time that happens, if that particular substance isn't outside the door waiting to get in, when the cell divides, there are less doorways. Now this can mean if there's less doorways, there's going to be less messages from the body. Back up to the brain saying, “Hey, we're low on nicotine. We want more.” Whereas I said, low on sugar, low on receiving anger (we'll come back to that one). Then they make less receptor sites for it.

 So, there is that period in the first minutes, days, weeks, months, where it may not feel any different, and this is where coaches will say consistency is everything. Stick at it. It'll work out in the end. When you know why it works out - like some people don't need to know the why like this - I like the science and I've known it's helped in my life. So, when, you know why, you can also visualize yourselves as they divide having less receptor sites for whatever it is you're giving up. And when we say you're giving something up again, there's a psychology to that. It's not meant to feel like you've got less. You’ve got less having this, you can't have it.

 So, if we say, what are we changing? We are stopping that, and we are changing it to this. And again, if you look to nature, if nature has a river going in a particular way, if the river’s going to stop flowing one way, it just doesn't stop. It'll create a big dam, not dam going to bust out some time. So instead of saying to the river, you can't go there anymore, instead you just build a little farrow off to the side. So, some of the water can start going that way. And more water can start going that way. And if it really is in alignment with what works with the water as well, it'll have a new pathway. And when the water starts to flow in that way, it'll all go there in due the course.

 So, let's see it as a stop change, and again, Pa’Ris’Ha would often say, “who's talking” now that, you know, do a stop change. So, there's a bit of the biology behind who’s talking and behind stop change. So, we're not necessarily just giving up nicotine. What are we doing instead? Now that's going to be different for each person.

 The more you do of whatever that thing is, going for a walk in the morning, singing, dancing, drawing, gardening, meditating, listening to the birds. But it works also that if you had one or two receptor sites, say for the feeling, when you've done a good 20-minute walk, if you keep doing those 20-minute walks, you'll have more receptor sites for those. You will want to go on that 20-minute walk. So, as I said in the beginning, it's not necessarily that the body is selecting what's good for you or not good for you. It's responding biochemically to what is lining up outside the door. And that's, what's up to you. That's where, what you choose in your environment.

 And when I say your environment, the physicality that you're looking out there outside of your body as an environment, but so too is the fluids (‘cause you can sort of think of your body as this wet thing), the fluids that your cells are bathed in that fluid is the environment of the cell, that is the outside of the door of the cell.

 So, what is the environment that your cells are floating in? And that is influenced by what you eat, what you drink, what you breathe in, and again, they're the physicality’s. Now, just for a little stretch and we're going to complete with this one, because we just have it as an idea for now, everything I've just said about substances. If you extend that to emotions and have a little time thinking about that, you can be addicted to somebody being angry with you. Someone being angry with you creates the same physical response as taking a physical substance. You hear it, you feel. There is a thought. The thought is translated into a physical substance that moves through the bloodstream lines up outside a cell membrane door and says “I am”, whatever it might be.

 I am a victim. I am angry. And it can be positive as well. This full range, even to be angry, sometimes, it could be positive. It's like about time someone actually stands up and says, no, I'm going to step forward in my own self. So again, not to say any emotion is bad, but if it's out of balance, like the too much nicotine or sugar, it could be time to change, stop change.

 So, who's talking and stop change and more shared wisdom.

 It feels like saying have a lifetime, such an influence in my life of a lifetime of teachings with Grandmother Pa'Ris'Ha

 By GDB

 Originally published on JMWriters blog. Republished by permission.