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kowupt · 11 days ago

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pairings : kang sae-byeok x f!reader cw : fluff, comfort, mutual pining, college au maybe? (word count : 1.3k) synopsis : some connections don’t need words, they just need time (and tamagotchi care tips). neither of them meant to keep coming back—but somehow, they did. author's note : i feel like i've been neglecting my wife, sae-byeok, so here's a cute lil' one for my fav freckled princess! taglist : @saebyeokbliss (users written in bold are in the perm tlist, comment to be in it!◝(ᵔᗜᵔ)◜)

kang sae-byeok didn't know how you showed up in her life.

that's a lie.

you both knew exactly when it began.. at that cursed park skirting the edge of the city, 2 a.m. on a work night that had no business feeling like fate.

you didn't know why you were there at the first place.

maybe it was insomnia, maybe it was the silence that buzzed painfully in your downtown apartment. or maybe it was the strange pull towards the girl by the lake you had stumbled on that fateful night, flicking stones across the water like she was trying to wake a loch ness monster that was sleeping beneath it.

one of the pebbles—smooth, damp, deliberate—skipped farther than the rest and landed right at your feet.

that's when she looked up.

the both of you just stood there with an awkward, stretched silence that was too fragile to hold.

you stared into each other's gaze like fools. you noticed how the moon made it look like her pupils were glazed over, silver pooling in a hush between you. her hair was muzzled up, probably from running her hands through it one too many times, but you liked how it looked.

sae-byeok was the first to look away. her nose crinkled slightly, a silent shrug rolling off her shoulders before she spun on her heels, those damn converse kicking off the earth as she dematerialized into the forest behind her, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

the air grew colder. the moonlight stretched longer across the lake. and the only thing that remained was the faint ripple where her pebble had last touched the water.

you told yourself it was nothing. just a strange encounter between a bored, off-putting girl and your melancholic self at an ungodly hour. you’d forget about it by morning.

another lie.

curiosity stuck to you. after a week fighting with your own thoughts, your feet wondered back to the same patch of woods and after being met with nothing but failure you went home with your lips curled down into a sad frown.

you were not one to give up.

because the next night, your being wandered back without permission.

and the night after that.

and then again, until it became something you never admitted to anyone.

security footage from the steps of your apartment caught you waddling out at midnight, clad only in a thick puffer jacket and bunny slippers in a pitiful attempt to see her again, maybe even work up the courage to approach her.

but every time you tried, you never saw her. not right away, but there were always traces :

freshly turned dirt by the lake where someone had stood, the smell of smoke from a cigarette that had gone out too quickly, a single pebble lying too neatly by the edge of the lake.

so you decided to venture in broad daylight.

after scouring the trail for that familiar freckled-face for what seemed like hours, passing by pine trees you swore you've encountered before in your journey, you sighed in defeat, perching on top of a nearby worn-out bench to mope, the wood groaning beneath you.

she probably only comes around at night, you were just too late to catch her in the act! you thought.

but you were wrong, because just as you were about to gather your things and leave, a figure slumps into the empty spot beside you.

that girl.

kang sae-byeok.

and suddenly, now that you were confronted by her presence, faced with the very person you'd been searching for.. it was as if you lost the mere ability to socialize, words getting caught in your throat.

so you did the only thing your scrambled mind could offer.

pulling out your cherished first-generation tamagotchi—easter egg patterned, still blinking with life out of your bag and wordlessly held it out in your open palm like it was a peace offering.

sae-byeok looked at you like you were crazy. her gaze flickered between your face and the pixelated creature wiggling in the tiny screen, its shiny eyes pleading for snacks or attention, maybe both.

then, the corner of her mouth twitched. not quite a smile, but close.

sae-byeok reached into her satchel, the one with the bright yellow 'i like cats' button pinned near the strap and student id card swinging slightly from a lanyard locked into one of the zippers and pulled out a sparkly green tamagotchi.

"oh."

from then on, your friendship blossomed in odd, quiet spaces. nights spent leaning against the same tree, knees brushing against each other but never enough to say something about it.

you traded snacks, silence, and digital pet advice like it was a sacred ritual.

she'd scowl when her little pet pal, chai, died unexpectedly (even though it was 100% her fault for neglecting it). you'd call it ugly, she'd call yours worse.

there were no expectations. just a mutual understanding in the stillness of the woods. two people who never quite fit right elsewhere, finding comfort in the silence beside each other.

and somehow, that was enough.

at least for now.

but it didn't happen all at once.

there was no grand gesture, no magical kiss under the stars or sweeping gesture pulled from a romance film.

maybe it was the way sae-byeok started to wait for you whenever your running late to your meet-ups instead of pretending to not care. or how she began bringing two drinks instead of one, offering a cigarette every time your gaze lingered at the bud hanging low on her lips..

but you noticed. of course you did.

"you always come back." she murmured, her voice quieter than usual.

"so do you," you replied, trying not to breathe too loud, afraid it would break the moment.

she stared at you for a while. long enough for the air to stretch and settle between you.

then, without warning, her hand found yours. cold, despite the warmth that bloomed in your chest.

not gently. not dramatically. just… firmly. like it had always been meant to be there. yours didn’t pull away, instead, your fingers weaved in between hers.

you didn't talk about it the next day, or the day after.

but you kept holding hands.

sometimes it was subtle, soft. sometimes it'd seem like your life depended on it. nevertheless, your pinkies would sometimes hook and brush against each other as you reached for a book at the local library.

conversations stayed casual. complaints about class, part-time jobs, the occasional sarcastic jab that made her lips twitch up in amusement. but every once in a while, she glances over at you like she was waiting for something. like she was daring for you to say the thing neither of you wanted to say first.

you never did.

neither did she.

and one evening, as the sky paints itself lavender and the lake had remained still enough to reflect everything back.

you rested your head on her shoulder.

sae-byeok's body tensed up.

not because it was sudden, but because it wasn't.

she had imagined this exact moment more times than she’d admit. because you didn't say anything, didn't warn her or utter a stupid joke as you did it. you were just there. as if you'd always been.. face buried at the crook of her neck.

she didn't dare to say a word.

instead, sae-byeok tilted her head gently until her cheek rested against your hair, breathing a scent of the sweet, addicting, floral perfume you had on matched with the bitter scent of her cigarette smoke sticking to your curls.

and in that silence, in that stillness, in that shared breath—you realized.

you were already in it.

whatever it was.

you both hadn't dared to call it by name.

not just yet.

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kowupt · 11 days ago

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Shush

Summary: Lee Seung-joo, a psychiatrist who treats you. Your words don’t scare her; in fact, she’s more intrigued. She wants to help you unravel your deepest, darkest secrets to heal…and even more than that.

Warning(s): Smut, Manipulate, Fingering, Oral, Bondage, Praise Kink, Overstimulation, Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.2k

You’ve seen your psychiatrist for two months now. Your feelings for her have increased over time. You blame yourself for being too easy. Falling for someone who listens to you for the first time?… Please, it's her job! It’s not right, yet something about her demeanor draws you. She’s quite a mystery. Her eyes are so dull, but her mouth tells of hope and advice.

Seungjoo sits with her legs crossed in front of you. A small coffee table in between chairs to create distance. She tilts her chin down to examine the clipboard on her lap. She lifts her finger and nudges the rim of her glasses up. You play with the tip of your fingers nervously. You didn’t know what to expect. She turns her head up to give you a small smile. You nibble the inside of your cheeks as an attempt to keep calm. The sound of the clock clicks each second.

“How are you today?” She asks. Her voice is warm and deep, like a warm blanket that could suffocate you if you stay too long underneath.

“I’m okay,” You quickly respond, straightening your back. She breathes out a small chuckle and lightly taps her papers with the tip of her fingers.

“You sound a little tense,” She teases, “Try to relax.”

You nervously nod your head and try to calm down by leaning back into the chair. The cushion underneath is surprisingly comfortable. Your anxiety slightly decreases. Her finger taps stop and she smiles.

“Good,” She says before looking back at her papers. She calmly drags her finger against the paper on which she had written this morning.

“Do you still seek any types of thrills? We briefly discussed this last time,”

“Kinda,” You respond. She pauses and tilts her head.

“How about we ask more personal and deeper questions today?” She begins, wanting to hear more from you. You quietly nod your head yes.

“For me to further understand your behavior and struggle,” She explains, looking deep into your eyes, “Are you in any form of romantic relationships?”

You self-consciously dart your eyes to the side and shift in your seat. You should have known this was going to come up sooner or later. Sexuality has been something you had to discover for yourself.

“No,” You respond.

“Please elaborate,” She softly urges. You feel your heart beginning to race again. Your eyes lower to stare at your pants.

“This is a safe place… I’m here for you,” She reminds you. She could read you like a book. You lift your head to look at her again. She gives you a reassuring smile.

“I don’t like to date because everyone expects me to date someone I don’t find… attractive,” You explain while leaving out important information. She slowly nods her head in acknowledgment. Her lips turn into a small frown.

“Why don’t you find this person attractive?” She asks, hoping to seek more. You swallow a dry gulp. You take a moment to pause as thoughts swirl into your head. You didn’t want to tell her at first, but after some thinking, you’ve realized you’ve grown to truly trust her.

“Because this person is a man,” You softly confess. Her face remains emotionless before she simply nods her head. She brushes her lips with her pointer finger. A habit that you’ve seen her do many times before.

“Many individuals face stress related to sexual orientation due to discrimination, concealment, internalized stigma…” She points out. She continues to explain how your view on sexuality is one of the reasons that impacted your mental health. You listen to her quietly, slightly zoning out. Analyzing how she would tilt her head when an insightful thought comes to mind. Or how her eyes slightly squint when she tries to find the appropriate word to use. Regardless of how much older she is, you were attracted. A small blush begins to form on your face, causing her to furrow her eyebrows.

“…Have you been with a woman?” She asks, snapping you back to life. You quickly blink and the tip of your tongue darts out to wet your lips.

“I haven’t,” You dryly cough. She begins to fidget again by rubbing her lower chin with her pointer finger. She starts to move and places her clipboard onto the coffee table. She leans back into her chair comfortably. One of her arms rests on the chair arm. Expressing her body language as confident and open. Her middle and ring fingers rub slow circles against the armchair.

“What do you want in a woman?” She asks. Your heart begins to race again. She softly chuckles and gets up from her seat. Her shoes click against the wooden floors of her office. Your eyes shamefully examine her body. Her long and slim figure was exposed underneath her beige and white outfit. Her slightly long black hair falls past her shoulder blades. She slowly makes her way to walk behind you.

You sit perfectly still, not knowing what to do. You hear your blood pumping in your ears. Suddenly, you feel a hand gently grip your shoulders. She bends down til her lips are the same level as your ears.

“Do you like them…nice? Or demanding? Or maybe even a little older?” She hums. Her deep voice sends shivers down your spine. She catches the way your breathing hicks. She smiles and leans up, removing her hands from your shoulders. She walks over to her desk and sits on the edge. Her hands rest on the desk next to her ships. She stares down at you.

“What do you think about when you please yourself?” She pushes her questions further. She wants to dig deep into your brain. She wants to know every little dirty secret you imagine. An aching craving is building in your lower stomach. You refuse to let her know you fantasize about her during dark hours. Imagining her fingers pushing and stretching you open. And how you imagine her voice telling you what to do. You squeeze your thighs together. She lifts her eyebrows in slight surprise. You speak or don’t get up from your seat, and she slowly rolls her eyes. The act alone almost made you wet. She parts her lips a little before making up her mind.

“Come here,” She says. You stumble on your footing as you walk over to her. Her eyelids lower as she peers underneath her lashes. You stop one foot away from her. She slides off the desk and grabs onto your wrists.

She tugs and pushes you against the desk. She traps your body by placing her hands beside your waist. Her body towers over you in authority. She leans her face down close to yours. You nervously look down.

“Do you trust me?” She whispers. You lift your head immediately.

“Yes,” You respond. The corner of her lips curls into a smile.

“Let me help you then,” She explains before leaning in. Her soft, plump lips touch yours. She kisses delicately and passionately. You let out a soft grunt of surprise. You forget how to breathe properly. She deepens the kiss, causing you to clench your eyes shut. Her kisses feel so good. You get lost in it. Her hands start to sneak up your shirt. She drags her finger against your spine. You arch your back, rubbing your front into her. She darkly chuckles and bites your bottom lip before pulling away. Your eyelids are heavy and your cheeks are flushed red. She drags her thumb against the button of your pants. She pauses and looks up.

“Can I touch you?” She hums. Her eyes are dilated, almost black. Her glasses slightly fell down her nose bridge during the kiss. You lift your hands to gently push the glasses back up. Her breathing hicks a little.

“Yes… Please touch me,” You whisper. With a swift movement, she unbuttons your pants. She shoves her hands in and pushes her hips into you, spreading your thighs apart. Her fingers nudge against the middle of your panties. You softly moan into her neck. She clenches her jaw in arousal.

She pushes your panties to the side and slides her fingers along your core. She touches your sensitive bud, circling it in a slow rhythm.

“You think of me, don’t you?” She darkly chuckles. She found your dirty little secret. Your silky juices leak out from your core. You tilt your head back and answer yes, mix in with moans. She collects your wetness with her middle finger. She continues playing with your nub. Rubbing your silkiness around it, making her fingers slide quicker. You begin to buckle your hips into her.

Once she finds you wet enough, she slowly shoves her middle finger into you. You feel her fingers go deeper. You gasp and clench onto her shoulders. She hums delightfully into your ears.

“Hold onto me tight,” She warns before shoving another finger in. You cry out in pleasure. Your pants limit her movement, reducing her to only curling her finger against your soft walls. She flickers her fingers over and over. You moan loudly, thrashing your body. She presses her face against your hair. She parts her lips and shushes you.

“Shhhh. You don’t want to get caught so quickly, right?” She whispers. Her fingers never stop moving. Your stomach tenses. Tears start to build up in your eyes. Her pace increases and you nearly fall backwards onto her desk. Her brutal thrust into your sensitive wall is too much. You choke on your moans. She lowers her face to bite your neck. She feels your walls clenching around her finger.

At that moment, your lower stomach snaps and you roll your eyes back. Your body trembles and jerks. Juices roll down and dampen your pants. Soft curse words escape from your mouth. She pulls her hand out of your pants. Wetness glistens on her hand and she examines it.

She walks over to her desk and grabs a napkin. Leaving you breathless on the other side. Your chest moves up and down quickly. You close your eyes to catch your breath. She quietly cleans her hands. Once she is done, she tosses the tissue into the garbage. Then she opens her drawers and pulls out a silk scarf. She walks over to you and lifts the scarf.

“Turn around,” She smiles. You weakly turn around and feel her pull your hands behind your back. She ties the scarf around your wrists. You try pulling them apart, but it’s tight. You turn around to look at her in confusion. She ignores you and begins to unbuckle her pants. She slides them down along with her underwear. They drop, revealing her smooth, bare skin.

She places her hands on top of your head and pushes you down to the floor. You kneel before her with your hands tied behind your back. She stands before you, her core near your face. You now understand why she tied you. You desperately wanted to grab her thighs and shove your face into her pussy.

She nudges her glasses up her nose bridge. She peers down at you with a small smile. You wait patiently for her orders. She laces her fingers between your hair and tugs your head closer to her core. She spreads her thighs. The smell of her arousal numbs your mind. You stick out your tongue. Once her pussy touches your mouth, you lose all self control. You drag your tongue against her hole. Her juice coats your whole mouth. You moan as you continue licking her.

“Good girl… you’re doing so good,” She grunts, pushing her core deeper into her mouth. Your tongue slides up to play with her clit. You flick and suck against the nub. Her grip on your head tightens. Her eyebrows furrow in pleasure. Soft moans slip out of her mouth. You tilt your head up to look at her. Her stomach tenses. Her hips roll over and over in your mouth. Sweat begins to form on her forehead. Due to her movement, her glasses start to slide down again. She pushes them up and returns her hands to your head. She grips hard, but you didn’t care.

“Your mouth is so good,” She praises. You feel your core throb. You unconsciously lift your hands to spread her thighs, but the scarf limits you. You groan into her pussy, causing her to bite her lip. She continues to ride you til her legs begin to shake.

“Don’t fucken stop,” She cusse, cheeks red. You shut your eyes and suck onto her nub hard. She jerks her hips and comes into your mouth. Her juices run down your chin. Her body twitches as she catches her breath. Her hand still clenches on your head, not letting you catch your breath. Finally, she tugs your head away. You gasp and catch your breath. You feel her wetness run down your neck. She lazily chuckles before grabbing your head again. She shoves your face back into her pussy. She grinds against your tongue with her head tilted back. She wants you to make her come over and over til she can't handle it anymore.

#TS IS SO PEAK #lee seunjoo can have my babies #who said that #AHSHAJDNEKCJSJMDA

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kowupt · 13 days ago

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001. so it begins. pairings : royal guard!kang no-eul x princess!reader cw : medieval/royalty au, comfort, hurt, fluff, slow burn that burns, mutual pining happens a few chapters in, reader with a disability, (a prosthetic on her right arm), kang no-eul is an undercover guard as is sometimes referred to with male pronouns and with the name 'kang in-seok'. mentions or implications of violence/war/death/blood. more tba. (word count : 3.7k) synopsis : as queen-to-be, you were bound by duty, your life mapped out by the expectations of the throne. but when the universe lets two different worlds collide, will you sacrifice your heart for the people, or defy everything to fight for a love that could change the future of the kingdom forever? author's note : mulan-inspired yuri for you freaks, i've been obsessed with mulan edits on tiktok hehe~ will be a few parts series. not proofread yet, so if there are any mistakes feel free to leave it in the comments! this is a repost since the last one had a content warning ♡ taglist : @saebyeokbliss (comment to be added to this series' taglist or.. be in the permanent tlist◝(ᵔᗜᵔ)◜)

it didn't have to come to this.

you didn't have to be standing on this creaky podium in the kingdom's heart beside your father. his head held up high as the bellman cried out for all the townspeople who peeked their heads out from their usual business in curiosity.

not with a pearlescent corset wrapped around your body a little too tight for comfort, knocking out all of the air in your lungs.

not with a thick, puffy petticoat under the floral fabric of your dress that made it feel like the sun was scorching ten times harsher.

your sharp eyes scanned the rows of soldiers standing motionless in front of the stage, lips curling into a small frown, the way their iron helmets reflect the bright sunlight made you squint painfully.

"hear ye! hear ye!" the bellman screeched, furiously shaking his trusty handbell in the spring air. "by decree of his majesty, king hwan of house baekseong-ga! let all traders pause, all smiths still their hammers, and all folk make ready to hear the voice of the crown."

you mentally rolled your eyes as your father, king hwan as mentioned, beamed in pride as he stood high on the wooden tribune, clearing his throat as he started to speak, his voice booming through every nook and cranny of the lively town.

"good people of cheongdam district—sons and daughters of most high. let it be known throughout the realm, on the morrow, at high sun, the selection procession of the new attending guard to our dearest, her royal highness, will commence."

the crowd erupted in whispers and murmurs, bouncing on their toes as they took interest in the bulky soldiers lined up to perfection at the king's foot with high confidence.

well some more than others.

kang no-eul, however, was sweating through her armor.

having been a commoner her whole life and the youngest of her five siblings, it didn't help that she had this gut-wrenching ache in her chest to be out there.

it was more than boredom, more than teenage defiance.

it was this need to work hard. a fierce, unrelenting desire to prove herself, that she was more than some other commoner. aim high for the stars and actually do something in life. she wanted to do more than bicker over chores with her mother, who seemed convinced that a well-swept floor was the first step toward becoming a proper housewife.

and when the opportunity was presented to her, (though she technically overheard it rather than received it outright, thanks to years of perfected eavesdropping.) with her eldest brother, kang in-seok, being the first in their bloodline to be offered with a chance of a high position as an attending guard for her highness.

that was all the spark no-eul needed. a window had opened, however small, and she wasn’t about to let it close without trying. she would take the risk.

that's how she ended up being sandwiched in between colossal-sized men. their heads held high and eyes fixed forward—utterly composed, unlike her. drowning in the guard uniform she had swiftly stolen from her brother’s quarters. (three sizes too big, at least)

under her thick, stifling helmet, no-eul's eyes squeezed shut. her hair tied up loosely and her sharp face dusted heavily in powder in an embarrassing attempt to make her look more manly, lips quivering slightly out of fear that her whole act was noticeable with how much she was fidgeting.

"these men have been carefully handpicked with great discernment by mine own judgment. the chosen, who must be the last standing, shall walk beside the crown, safeguard its life, and bear witness to its most private councils." king hwan announced with certainty in his voice.

"as you well know, we do not take such matters lightly. in light of recent events that have weighed heavily upon the health of my beloved daughter, her highness.. we are compelled to act with utmost vigilance. should any guard falter in duty or stray from the code entrusted to them, they shall be dismissed without exception."

your lips tightened at your father's comment, carving a sharper line between your brows.

your attention was then shifted to the prosthetic in your right arm, sleek, finely crafted, impossibly precise—the metal reflected the delicate features of your face like a mirror. its mechanics whirred as you flexed your fingers. this wasn't flesh, this wasn't yours.

maybe you shouldn't've sat too close to the window seat that fateful day in the carriage.

maybe you should've warned the coachman when the carriage started to tread deeper into the restricted walls of the rival kingdom.

but it was too late.

because the next thing you know, your eardrums bursts and pupils blown wide as you got launched off the passenger seat, and onto the mossy ground below.

the soft squeak of the wheels and crackling fire was what helped you stayed conscious, however, your body was not.

from your peripheral vision you could see the coachman crawl out from under the cart, his calloused hand reached out for a chance at life before taking his last breath.

but the most devastating of them all? pearbutter, the beloved horse you'd raise and taken care for since she was a filly laid lifeless on the ground. her mane burnt and streaked with blood, her leg bent at a sickening angle. the once proud stallion that galloped the streets of cheongdam with you on its back looked impossibly small curled up in the dirt.

you wanted to scream. wanted to cry to your mother for comfort. the world went heartbreakingly still before you heard distant crackles of leaves, and whinnying of horses.

and now you're here.

now, whenever you'd raise your arm to dismiss royal subjects, or when you'd lift your goblet for a toast at banquets.. the sleeves of your well tailored gown would ride up where curious eyes might catch a glimpse of the truth.

the attention felt like scrutiny. the pitiful whispers from the town folks and coos of 'what could've been from the future queen'.

you hated it. but you hated it more when you noticed one of the soldiers in line had his head particularly turned in the direction of your ivory prosthetic. you could've sworn you could see his eyes gleam with the same boring curiosity everyone else had.

kang no-eul didn't mean to stare for a beat longer than intended.

but the way your beauty was bestowed upon her undeserving eyes. a being wrapped in silk and authority, the way the sun caught in your locks of hair and the way your eyes would soften when kids waved at you by the fountain stewed something deep inside her.

this was abnormal. not when she used to curse your family's name. not when she used to envy of the freedom and riches that was handed to you in a silver platter.

what did she know of hunger? of cracked hands, nails filled to the brim with dirt and sleepless nights?

those bitter thoughts used to echo endlessly in no-eul’s mind. sharp, relentless. until the day everything shifted.

kang no-eul remembered the day when you walked barefoot into the floodwaters to help rescue stranded villagers, crown tucked into your sash like it was an afterthought.

your embroidered dress tainted with mud and water, dirty beyond recognition. yet, you paid no matter to it. rather, slumping down the drowned streets to help an injured stable boy. running past the guards rather than hiding behind them, throwing away protocol to the wind for the sake of people who had nothing to give back.

she saw you change, or maybe you had always been this way, and she had just been too angry to see.

now, kang no-eul watched you with a burning awe. she no longer averts her eyes at the presence of her highness anymore. instead, she was pull into it like a moth to a flame.

the same admiration stayed deep in no-eul's veins as she laid in the guard's quarters that night, trying to steady her breath in the dim silence. curled up on the lower bunk in nothing but her undergarments, a makeshift bandage she swiped from her mother's medicine cabinet wrapped around her lanky torso, digging into her ribs and still aching from that morning’s drills.

rubbing her face with her hands with the last bit of consciousness she had with exhaustion seeping into her bones, it finally dawned on her that she had to earn that title for the princess' attending guard, no shortcuts, no excuses.

and like hell she was going to slack off.

not when she saw someone worth protecting with her whole damn soul.

so she pulled the thin blanket tighter around her, ignoring the dull throb in her side, and promised herself that tomorrow, she'd give it her all.

and when dawn greets the far land of viermont, you were already waiting by the courtyard. manicured nails picking at the rose bushes as the royal sergeant announced the first drill challenge for the week with the breaking of the wax seal. the scroll in his gloved hand crackled as he unraveled the mystery.

"hear me now, ye chosen of the sword and seal."

the royal sergeant continued as the knights quieted down, pacing in a straight line, his boots echoing with each deliberate step.

"by decree of her most sovereign grace, and by the will of the crown, thou art called to undertake the first trial."

you cocked an amused eyebrow up as the soldiers straightened in unison, ready for any instruction that unravels from your lips.

you let the moment stretch before letting your back draw taut like a bowstring, chin held up high and eyes sweeping over their armored forms until they came to rest on one in particular.

hers.

or his, as you thought.

kang no-eul with her helmet tucked beneath her arm. jaw set, but not without tremble.

intriguing.

since most of the other men would just suck up their nerves and shove it down their system or hold up their head with faux pride and confidence.

but you saw something vulnerable.

and oh, was it intriguing.

"each of ye fine men shall be given a scroll inscribed with five riddles, crafted by the royal scribes and steeped in the old tongue, customized beyond thought. remember the five pillars that upholds our realm.." a graceful smile stretched your features as you brought up your synthetic joints to count.

"courage, discipline, wisdom.. and compassion.”

kang no-eul shoved down the dry, nervous lump on her throat as she tries to recount your words. she was quietly grateful for the lack of a helm. she could hear every word, and more importantly, she could see you.

you continued, voice calm and authoritative :

"these shall lead you to hidden relics in the palace, chapel, town hall or maybe somewhere deeper within the city. you will have until sundown, return with all five, or return with none. alas, return. for there will be no aid given, no second chances offered."

a murmur spread through the file like a gust of wind through leaves. already, some were making their way toward the long wooden stand bearing the sealed scrolls, some jostling for position, anxious that their challenge might be the cruelest.

"commence."

kang no-eul wasn't even able to dial her brain into its right state of mind before she saw the other men bolting through the gates, already eagerly in search for the missing relic for their dearest princess.

so with that, no-eul snatched the closest scroll that was within reach before darting out the palace, her head spun as she saw how other knights rushed past her.

following her instincts and heading to the outskirts of the capital, kang no-eul finally uncoiled the scroll in her hand, dark brown eyes reading its contents..

"seek not the tower, nor the blade nor the crown, but where silence is heavy, and eyes look down. where fingers craft with charcoal grace, and tales are etched on every surface and face."

most candidates would take this riddle as metaphor, searching graveyards, mineshafts or empty courtyards. no-eul however headed for where a half-sunken tenement lies—the part of the city the nobility pretends it doesn’t exist.

she passed by the moaning of beggars, her brows furrowed at the sight of woven mats laid down in the pavement and couldn't help but wrap her spare cloak around a shoemaker's shoulders. offering a kind grandma some dried fruit and water from her satchel.

as she wandered deeper amidst the cracked stones and smoke-stained walls, she heard it.

the soft crackles of charcoal and mutters of the same riddle she had studied a heartbeat ago.

there he was, a young orphan boy limping in front of a brick wall, left unnoticed by passersby.

his charcoal stick glide on the brick where he had drawn the five pillars of cheongdam, the mural half-way done.

but he was limping, alone, his sinless hands tainted with coal and muck.

no-eul starts to question, is the relic hidden nearby..? or is he the answer himself..?

instead of rushing the task, no-eul knelt beside him. her gloved hand brushing his muzzed up hair to see his curious-for-the-world eyes.

the boy offered the raven haired girl one of his stubby coal and no-eul happily accepted his offer, helping him finish up the wall drawing while listening to his babbled stories.

hours pass. the sun dips.

as the bells begins to toll, kang no-eul knew she's running out of time.

that was, until the boy noticed the flicker of unease shadowing her face. he tilted his head, then gently tapped the edge of her pauldron.

with a big grin, he reached beneath his worn beret and pulled out a shiny bronze token with 'the sigil of compassion' engraved on the inner face of the alloy.

"found this in the gutter by the traveller's rest, kind sir." his voice high and earnest, "didn’t know why i kept it, really. just had a feelin’ I ought to." the boy shrugged, dropping the coin right into no-eul's open palm.

"but seeing how knights like you have been tearin' down the streets in search of these things, i reckon you’re the one who ought to have it."

a gentle light flickered in no-eul's eyes, lashes dipping as her expression grew tender. she had never been graced with this much humility and goodwill.

"thank you.." no-eul charmingly accepted the small token and with it carried a weight far greater than gold.

but she didn't leave the slums completely empty handed. for that evening, she walked hand in hand with the orphan boy, being the last knight to pass beneath the palace gates.

at the head of the grand hall, you sat poised on the high dais, chin lifted, your cheek resting lightly against the curve of your knuckles. to your right, king hwan sat in still authority. your gaze snapped toward the echoing creak of the palace doors.

however, you weren't only greeted with the last soldier, but also with the frail boy that rested on his hip.

"come forth." king hwan commanded, his voice undecipherable, gesturing the pair over to the steps leading to the throne.

kang no-eul felt small as all heavy eyes were on her, thinly veiled judgmental looks passed around the guards flanked arount the throne, those who were victorious and prideful in completing the task.

your father whispered to the sergeant, before turning back to meet the tired knight's eyes.

"kang in-seok of the kang household. it is by my decree that you are the last of thirty men to finish the trials. present thy relics to her highness."

you lifted up your bloated skirt to stroll in front of no-eul. with a serene tilt of your head, you brought out your dainty, waiting hands as an invitation.

no-eul took a shuddering breath before reaching into her satchel, pulling out one, singular disc out of the five she had to collect, the token of compassion.

you blinked with mirth as her findings was carefully placed on your hand—too careful. you kept the graceful smile on your face as you spoke gently.

"tell me, candidate kang in-seok, why did you not finish your trial?"

the raven haired knight hung her head low, her gaze trailed back to the pure-faced boy that rested on her side. "because I chose not to leave someone behind.. just to prove i was worthy of standing beside you."

your felt your ghost of a smile stretch wider, closing your palm that was now hand full with the single relic, "then you have already proven it."

no-eul let a breath of fresh air release from her tightened lungs, an airy laugh escaping her lips.

"i know this would be out of line, your highness, and I know I’ve given much reason for disappointment today. but if it pleases you, may this boy be sent home with a full belly and warm clothes, just so i can sleep well tonight."

there was a pang of something unspoken that stirred in your chest—respect, perhaps, or something warmer.. it felt as if the knight—kang in-seok as you knew him, had open the lock to your heart.

you finally got a good look of 'his' face.

pretty. the thought bloomed in your mind.

your father was about to protest but you held up a hand towards him, signaling for him to hold his thought.

"i'll have the maids gather the finest fabric to clothe him in, and send him home with supper from the royal kitchens. by our outstanding chefs.."

"..but i still stand by the rules, candidate kang in-seok. the dinner we'll provide for the boy will be taken out of your wages."

no-eul nodded eagerly, her lips pressing into a thin line, "that's more than fair, my princess."

"very well." you quipped, warmth creeping up your neck, but before the feeling could over your senses, you clasped your hands together with the cherished bronze token still buried in between them, turning back to your father, "that concludes today's trials."

king hwan stuttered, standing up abruptly. "ah, right.. future hands of the heir, you may be dismissed back to your sleeping quarters. your judgement will be finalized on the morrow."

no-eul felt the weight on her shoulders had been lifted off as she watched the orphan boy being whisked away deep into the castle halls by the maids, not before waving him a last goodbye.

but she still had this anxious ache in her chestplate, fearing that she had fall short of the king's standards, and that today could've been her final chance to fight for the title despite the fact that the trials had only just begun.

being snapped out of her thoughts, no-eul's moonlit eyes flickered back to yours before sinking to her knees.

"thank you, your grace. have mercy on this servant of yours. i had to do what i had to do. may the relics I failed to find find their way back to your hands.. if it be the will of the gods."

a genuine grin graced your face, the freckles on her face dusted over her cheeks like constellations in the night sky and you swore you could spend days curiously counting them one by one.

"rise."

and so she did.

"i admire your courage, soldier. you had presented something i find very valuable in a royal guard." you hummed, toying with the bronze in between your fingers, "loyalty, trust, selflessness.. values that go beyond the five pillars."

you continued when you saw the glimmer of hope in no-eul's irises, sauntering closer until you're just a hair's breath away from the knight.

"i'd consider you the winner of today's challenge if it wasn't for father's excessive rules. but until then, you're dismissed."

kang no-eul stood there dumbfounded before finding her place and soon, the sound of armor and footsteps faded from the throne room, even the king had risen from his seat with a quiet humph, retreating to his chambers without pressing further.

but you remained seated, expression thoughtful.

kang in-seok.

or rather, no-eul.

she had been the last to return.. and the only one who had brought back nothing for herself to flaunt with.

nothing, and somehow.. everything.

the memory of her eyes flashed in your mind: not seeking praise, but hoping for justice. not for herself, but for a boy with coal-streaked cheeks and no name.

you switched the bronze token from your slender, flesh fingers to your metal ones where they curled a little tighter around the heirloom resting in your palms, steel and bronze met with a soft clink.

though you were handling the prize with your cold, brittle prosthetic. you could feel that it was warm now.. from your touch, or hers, you couldn’t tell.

"pretty." you whispered aloud this time, finally releasing the relic on the silver platter that perched atop velvet cushion on your right.

after some more contemplating, you rose from your seat, moving slowly to the corridor behind the dais. one of the maids that stayed behind followed the train of your dress.

"have the token polished for that guard, kim in-seok. make sure it finds its way back to his hands. switch him out with one of the knights that fared mediocre on their trial, i see his potential." your voice low and thoughtful.

the maid nodded obediently carefully handling the silver platter that held the heirloom with utmost care and ushered you back into your bedchamber for the night.

morning came softly.

the sun pooled into the cracks of the stained glass window of the bunkroom, different hues of the rainbow spilled into the gravel floor.

no-eul's long eyelashes fluttered open, her eyebrows knitted together, still half-dazed with sleep.

then she noticed it.

noticed how the bunk above her had been stripped bare. covers missing, ladder drawn out to the side.

the same with some other bunks in the quarter, footlockers were gone and some of the bedding had been wheeled out completely out of the room.

then it struck her.

a stretched sigh escaped her rosebud lips, she had to rub her eyes over and over just to double check. the tension in her muscles dissipated, even when the bandage around her chest felt ever so tight.

she was still there.

spared another day, even with her poor performance.

and she had you to thank for it.

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kowupt · 13 days ago

Text

it didn't have to come to this.

not with a pearlescent corset wrapped around your body a little too tight for comfort, knocking out all of the air in your lungs.

not with a thick, puffy petticoat under the floral fabric of your dress that made it feel like the sun was scorching ten times harsher.

the crowd erupted in whispers and murmurs, bouncing on their toes as they took interest in the bulky soldiers lined up to perfection at the king's foot with high confidence.

well some more than others.

kang no-eul, however, was sweating through her armor.

having been a commoner her whole life and the youngest of her five siblings, it didn't help that she had this gut-wrenching ache in her chest to be out there.

it was more than boredom, more than teenage defiance.

that was all the spark no-eul needed. a window had opened, however small, and she wasn’t about to let it close without trying. she would take the risk.

your lips tightened at your father's comment, carving a sharper line between your brows.

maybe you shouldn't've sat too close to the window seat that fateful day in the carriage.

maybe you should've warned the coachman when the carriage started to tread deeper into the restricted walls of the rival kingdom.

but it was too late.

because the next thing you know, your eardrums bursts and pupils blown wide as you got launched off the passenger seat, and onto the mossy ground below.

the soft squeak of the wheels and crackling fire was what helped you stayed conscious, however, your body was not.

from your peripheral vision you could see the coachman crawl out from under the cart, his calloused hand reached out for a chance at life before taking his last breath.

you wanted to scream. wanted to cry to your mother for comfort. the world went heartbreakingly still before you heard distant crackles of leaves, and whinnying of horses.

and now you're here.

the attention felt like scrutiny. the pitiful whispers from the town folks and coos of 'what could've been from the future queen'.

you hated it.

you hated it more when you noticed one of the soldiers in line had his head particularly turned in the direction of your ivory prosthetic. you could've sworn you could see his eyes gleam with the same boring curiosity everyone else had.

kang no-eul didn't mean to stare for a beat longer than intended.

this was abnormal. not when she used to curse your family's name. not when she used to envy of the freedom and riches that was handed to you in a silver platter.

what did she know of hunger? of cracked hands, nails filled to the brim with dirt and sleepless nights?

those bitter thoughts used to echo endlessly in no-eul’s mind. sharp, relentless. until the day everything shifted.

kang no-eul remembered the day when you walked barefoot into the floodwaters to help rescue stranded villagers, crown tucked into your sash like it was an afterthought.

she saw you change, or maybe you had always been this way, and she had just been too angry to see.

now, kang no-eul watched you with a burning awe. she no longer averts her eyes at the presence of her highness anymore. instead, she was pulled into it like a moth to a flame.

rubbing her face with her hands with the last bit of consciousness she had, exhaustion seeping into her bones, it finally dawned on her that she had to earn that title for the princess' attending guard, no shortcuts, no excuses.

and like hell she was going to slack off.

not when she saw someone worth protecting with her whole damn soul.

so she pulled the thin blanket tighter around her, ignoring the dull throb in her side, and promised herself that tomorrow, she'd give it her all.

and when dawn greets the far land of cheongdam, you were already waiting by the courtyard. manicured nails picking at the rose bushes as the royal sergeant announced the first challenge for the week with the breaking of the wax seal. the scroll in his gloved hand crackled as he unraveled the mystery.