lilymaddison

[lilymaddison]

They Took Hope From Us Yesterday

They took hope from us yesterday. We gathered in rows, awaiting our beloveds’ return Seeking a whole, but finding remains And in my soul, I scream. I can see the tears, hear the song Lifted up by our broken spirit In honor of two boys, the price of war Too high to pay I weep for the youth, and I myself Am only sixteen. I am old now, Wizened by the tragedies That plague G-d's people, haunted, Seeking asylum in “the land of the free” While the promised land is crumbling. When the Father comes and sees our mess, He’ll recognize His people on both sides of the fight Ravaged and bleeding, begging to be saved From the group at the head of the mutual destruction And He will lift us one and the same, for He doesn’t pick sides with His children. Abraham’s seed will unite, one family under G-d, And we will be liberated together. So for now I grieve our oppressors’ mistakes, But though they took hope from us yesterday, I know I will find it once more tomorrow.

[lilymaddison]

In case our time is running out, let me say I love you so

When I trace my roots, I always find you waiting back home

Through every phase, I feel your presence lurking in the undertone

Good things will keep on ending, but you've stayed, and that's incredible

[lilymaddison]

I’m so happy I could die, paint a watercolor sky

But paper wasn’t made to hold it

Instead it seeps out of my eyes, is he pain or paradise?

Hope to God my ache goes unnoticed

Something about his soul reminds me of a summer storm

The sound of thunder and rain, the smell of ink on a page

It's a current deeper than words, softer than hands interlaced

And stronger than my worst regrets, we're closer for our loneliness

[lilymaddison]

“The thing about me is that I have nothing to offer you. I’m a wannabe in a field of professionals, writing sappy stories and melancholy lyrics. I play viola, but not very well; I know one song on the piano. What good will that do you?

If you are looking for someone talented, I can’t help you. In fact, the one and only thing I truly believe I can do better than anyone else is love you. I can talk, or listen, or hug, or give you space. I can stay up late or wake up early, accept your phone call at 4am if you need me then. I can spend time with you, and go after you when you storm away, and keep seeing the best in you when you hurt me. I can be your support, your friend, your other half. I can make you laugh. I can hold your hand. I can be your first kiss and every one after. If you’re looking for someone to admire, you’ve come to the wrong place. But if you’re looking for a partner, that’s why I’m here.”

[lilymaddison]

And I’ll tell her I forgive her, but the words taste more like lies

I will hug her, but I never did forget the life in her eyes

That spark burned every tree in our forest, it’s tainting the word ‘friend’

I apologize, I’ve just spent so much time in rigor mortis

And I can tell her I’m proud of her, but the words taste more like spite

I will hug her, but my hands around her back will feel like knives

I want her to be happier than life, but she’s envied by the dead

I apologize, I’ve just spent so much time in rigor mortis

[lilymaddison]

Do you love or hate me?

Do you love or hate me? I just don’t understand I opened my heart for you to dismantle it Pull my plugs, I lose the beat again So I fix myself up and build my walls But you tug, you tug, you tug, Until I give you the smallest foothold, The tiniest, defeated ‘okay’ whispered into the silence Because the lonely, confused, hurting little girl I hide Just wants to be loved by her mother Then you turn my shards into weapons, my tears into poisons Inject me with venom, a bottle labeled ‘love’ Because you can’t deny affection when it’s running through your veins, Even if it’s the substance that’s killing you “How can you say I don’t love you?”, you ask. “I’ve loved you from the first.” But a boy teaches me what love really is when he picks me up and spins me He is my best friend, a support, and the difference between his love and your love Is that his love shows me I can be liked too, while your love tells me I am loved In spite of my lack of likability, That you are a martyr for loving me. The world is cold, but love does not reflect that, and when I stopped to consider it Your love looked less like love and more like hate, Like a bomb waiting to go off in my bloodstream, because calling it love does not make it so, And kissing my head will not remove the knife from my back, And buying vacations and video games won’t cancel your debt to me. You’ll blame it on the age, misunderstandings, and my flaws But the fact is, one day I’m gonna be gone I think you’ve noticed that, because every time I swear I’m done You come back with another bottle, and this one feels like love. Though the contents are different, they have the same name So you’ll swear you’ve been using the same substance all along But I can feel the difference. This one saves, the other kills And you’ll nurse me back to life support just before the soul passes And I think something’s different, maybe things can be different And in honor of such hope, I’ll give you the foothold again Then, satisfied with your work, the first bottle’s in your hand, In my blood, in my heart— Don’t you dare call me crazy, When you’re the one who deigned to shape me With your bottles and lies, your drama and crocodile tears You said we were close, but my scars are still here So do you love me or hate me? I’ll never understand All I ask is that you let me go free.

[lilymaddison]

When you reach the top, they glare from below

When the gravity comes, they’ll harden the blow

They save their salt just for your wounds

And run you raw once they reach you

People saw my burning town and grabbed their gasoline,

Drenched me in their Cheshire grins and danced around the scene

[lilymaddison]

"The One who keeps the stars also holds her heart. She'll be okay."

--Al, Mythicals: The Star-Holder

[lilymaddison]

“'I’m done just sitting here and acting like everything’s okay now. Like her walking out on my dad fixed anything. It didn’t fix her marriage, it didn’t fix her life, and it sure didn’t fix her relationship with me. It only made things worse, and now she’s brought me down here to spend the summer with her like she’s a mother now? I don’t want this. I don’t want her.'

'Harper—' I begin weakly, but she holds up a hand.

'I’m gonna leave this behind.' She says it quietly, but her voice grows in confidence as she continues. 'Yeah, I’m gonna skip this godforsaken town and do something, Carol. I want to people-watch at a cafe in France, and go bike riding down a country road, and toss a coin in the Trevi, and all the other stuff people do to properly live. We’re South Side kids, we have all the money in the world in our pockets.'

I shake my head slowly. 'No, Harper. You’re a South Side kid whose tuition is paid for by my parents.'

She gets my point. With a subtle caving of her shoulders, I know her reckless abandon has passed, and I cross the room to hug her. 'It’s gonna be okay, hon. You’re gonna be okay.'"

[lilymaddison]

“Get the hell out of my face before I make you.” “I broke one of your legs already and that was an accident. You think I couldn’t do it again on purpose?”

[lilymaddison]

I’m clotting the blood you shed, disposing of the bones

Found a coffin for the body, but none big enough for the hope

[lilymaddison]

I climbed to the sun and fell in a concrete jungle... and I'm the fucking king 🖤

(the poster is clean :) )

[lilymaddison]

Undric: I'm the smart one here. My wife is a total idiot. Gemma: funny, she said the same thing but about you. Undric: …

[lilymaddison]

He stares at me intensely, his eyebrows drawn together ever so slightly behind his rectangle-framed glasses. After a few uneventful moments, he raises his hand a tiny bit and I feel myself lift off the ground. I gasp in surprise, and Amarri gives a shout of laughter.

“You actually managed it!” I squawk, and Al grins. “Oh no.”

He spins his finger upward, sending me spinning towards the ceiling. I scream, but he curves his hand at the last second, and my spine curls so I barely miss colliding with our roof. He draws slow, lazy circles with his finger, and I follow suit from up in the air.

“Okay, put me down,” I gasp. He shrugs, then drops his hand suddenly so that I hurtle back to the floor, shrieking in alarm. He’s maneuvered it so that I fall safely into his lap, and Amarri whistles.

“How romantic, Al, but saving the girl usually only works when you’re not the one terrorizing her.”

[lilymaddison]

“It’s Dubanai,” he says quietly, and I laugh.

“Yeah, sure it is. She’s a trophy wife, for God’s sake.”

He’s silent for a moment, and the look on his face suggests that he’s weighing his words carefully. “These are people who cannot afford to put their eggs in one basket. I mean what I’m saying– he’s the head, but she’s the neck, pivoting him in the directions he needs to succeed.”

I gape a little. “I believe that might be the most you’ve ever said to me at one time.” He snorts in laughter, but I continue, “and I guess you could be right. I just can’t believe that someone so allegedly intelligent would have settled for a guy like Undric. I find it more likely that her asset to him is her looks.”

Harlan cocks his head slightly, looking at me with furrowed eyebrows. “Is it not possible to be both beautiful and brilliant?”

Damn, he got me with feminism. “Of course it is. I just find it unlikely in her case, but it’s definitely possible to be both.”

He turns back to the water, satisfied. “Good. You of all people cannot possibly believe such a thing. You’re better than that.”

[lilymaddison]

(bridge time oh yeah)

I couldn’t stand you being another phantom limb from my teens,

Gnawing at me in memories cause our heartbeats never synced

A fool in love was always a fool, he just needed an excuse

But while dignity is my best ruse, when the curtain falls, I still want you

I'd take this secret to my grave, but I've already died

[lilymaddison]

"The Star-Killer will try his hardest, but he really is no match for the goodness in the world, nor the One who commands it.”

- Alora, Mythicals: The Star-Holder