lookastarlightnight-blog - Tumblr blog

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

The List

Genre - Fluff/Angst

Word count - 3k

Reader x Hyungwon

WARNING - This fan fiction deals with serious issues and problems!

You are extremely depressed and on the edge of killing yourself but you can’t do it because you need to finish your list. There’s 2 lists, one where you do it so you can die peacefully and one where it’ll make you want to stay alive and be happy. You meet a guy ‘Hyungwon’ and he shows you there are things to be happy about in life. I hope you enjoy! ~ Ummie 

You wake up to sunlight coming in through your blinds of your bedroom window shinning in your eyes. You automatically say to yourself "I'm still here". You pick your phone up from the night stand and see ‘7:37’. You put your phone back on the night stand and throw your cover back over your face. You don’t want to get out of bed. You don’t want to talk to anyone. You don’t want to be here anymore but you can’t leave.  

After 10 minutes, you get out of bed go downstairs and see your parent’s downstairs eating breakfast with your older brother. Your mother always favored your brother and treated him like a child while your father didn’t pick favorites. You pick up an apple from the basket on the table and kiss your parent’s goodbye without saying anything. You don’t really talk to your family since they usually yell at you or give you a lecture.  

You get to the front door but as soon as you shut it, you start to freak out. You can’t really breathe and you almost start crying. You feel like you’re going to die, like you can’t breathe. You feel like you’re in hell.  

You tried to tell your family about it several times but they never say anything about it. They usually say “You’re just freaking yourself out” or “You’ll be fine”. So, you’re pretty much dealing with it on your own. Going outside is a constant issue for you. Since you were in middle school you were bullied really bad. You’ve been pushed down flights of stairs and punched in the face. You’ve had food thrown at you and you’ve had rumors spread about you that weren’t true. You developed anorexia at a young age as well as depression and anxiety. Your family never really understands and you know that everyone experiences depression one way or another but your family doesn’t help.  

You haven’t had a day where you didn’t want to die or where all you want to do is stay in bed and cry. You try to stay positive but nothing helps you be positive. You’re scared to fall in love because all you’ve been is hurt, you’ve been cheated on and abused mentally. You’ve been used and you have bad trust issues.

-

You take a deep breath and start walking. You think to yourself “will I fall in love? Will I finally be happy? Will I be okay?” You walk down to the café and pick up the usual ‘medium hot chocolate with whipped cream.’ You sip the hot chocolate which slightly burns your tongue but you don’t care. You walk and step on crunchy leaves which calms you down for some reason. You slowly walk to work but you don’t want to go.  

You feel your phone vibrate and it’s your best friend ‘Maddie’

~Stay positive today. I love you  

You look at it, smile and put your phone back in your bag. You get to work which is at a library and get settled in, you see a family come in. You muster up the courage and say “Good Morning.” You look at them for a minute and wish that your family could’ve been like that. Happy, together and okay. You think back and realize that you haven’t had a birthday party before. Your parents didn’t come to any of your soccer games. You shake your head and get back to work trying to focus.

-

After work you walk to the park and sit down on a bench while the cool autumn breeze lightly goes across your face making pieces of your hair fly around. You see leaves fly across your feet as the wind pushes them and you see a couple walking a cute German Shephard. You’re always envious of people that smile. It looks easy when they do it but when you do it, it hurts. You look at the cars driving down the street and wonder if your family would care if you just jumped in the traffic. You can’t do it though, because you aren’t done. You need to finish your list. You made a promise to yourself that once you finish your list, you’ll end it. You won’t be in pain anymore. You won’t cry when doing it, you might even be happy.  

You look at your phone and see your mom texted you  

~Come home for dinner  

You take a deep breath as you stand up and begin to walk home. As you walk little flurries of snow begin falling down, you see them and you get a little sad. Mainly because once snow melts it’s actually gone unlike you are.  

You get home and see your father setting the table and your mother finishing up dinner. Your brother is at the table on his phone. Your mother looks at you and says “How was work?” You take your coat off and go wash your hands and say “it was okay. Got a raise so that’s good” You take a few dishes and put them on the table to help your mother. You look at Justin and say “Justin... You know you could actually help mom, right?” He looks up at you and rolls his eyes. Your mother looks at him and says “She’s right. Your sister just got back from work and first thing she does is help but you’ve been here all day and you didn’t try to help.” He puts his phone down and looks up at your mother and quietly says "sorry”

-

The next day Maddie comes over and says “Y/N don’t be mad... You’ve been saying how you wonder if you’re going to fall in love so I made you an account on Tinder” You look at her and say “Are you fucking kidding me?” Maddie looks at you with puppy eyes and says “You got 20 matches so far... I made it this morning. I think I found a guy that you’ll like. His name is Hyungwon and he’s really sweet. I told him that I made it for you and he was telling me about himself.” You look at her with a mad look on your face. As you’re about to yell at her she shoves her phone in your face and shows you what he looks like and says “He told me to give you his number.” You close your eyes tight and say “Maddie... how do you know if he’s not fake? I don’t want to be on Catfish.” You feel bad yelling at her but you’re pissed off. She looks down “well I don’t know if he isn’t fake. He seems real. Text him, you can see how nice he is.”

You take your phone out and text him:

~Hey this is Y/N! I just found out about the while Tinder thing lol

You think to yourself "what if he doesn't respond?"

~Hey! haha its fine. Your friend was telling me about you. You seem really nice

Maddie leaves and you end up talking to Hyungwon for a few hours. You wonder if you’ll even meet him and if so, what he’ll think about you.  

You looked at his picture and you see how handsome he is. His lips are pink and plump and his eyes are a beautiful shade of dark brown. His skin is a little pale and he has light brown hair. He looks like he could be a model. You think 'will a guy that looks like him ever like a girl like me'. Or will he be able to check off one of the things on your list that’ll make you not kill yourself? The almost impossible, fall in love.

-

Maddie comes to your job a few days later to see you  

"Okay Y/N, how do you feel about him?" She asks you and you answer her while putting books on shelves "He's really nice. Just hard to believe that he finds me pretty or he’s even talking to me."  

Maddie rolls her eyes and looks at you with an upset look on her face "You know you’re beautiful, right?" You shake your head and keep putting books away. You look back as you hear the bell on the door in the library ring. You look back quickly and say "Good Aft-" as you’re about to say good afternoon, your eyes widen and you see Hyungwon walking in and looking for books.

"Maddie! He's here!" Maddie looks around and sees Hyungwon looking for books. "OMG HES REALLY HERE!" you both duck down and you say "WHAT AM I GONNA DO?" Maddie looks back up to see him and says "I’ll go talk to him!" before you can stop her, she’s already skipping over to him. She looks back at him and waves.

"Hello Hyungwon. I'm the girl you were talking to the other day about my friend" He looks at Maddison and says "really? Nice to meet you. How are you?" You walk over to the desk and try to stay quiet. You stand there slightly hearing Maddie talking to him.  

You hear them talking getting a little louder. You turn around and take 3 deep breaths then turn back around. Maddie walks to the desk with him and he hands you the book and library card without even making eye contact since he’s taking to Maddie.

"So Hyungwon, would you meet her in person?" You look at Maddie and you check out the book and look back down before Hyungwon can tell it’s you. "I would, I'm not sure when I'll meet her though"  

Maddie nods her head and whispers "look at the name tag" Hyungwon has a confused look on his face and looks at you then his eyes widen and get really big. "Y/N?" You hand him his book and smile "yeah, how are you?"

Your replacement walks over. You put your jacket on and get your bag. You begin to have trouble breathing and your vision starts to get blurry. You turn around and Hyungwon walks over to you and smiles. He gives you a hug and you think 'why is he more handsome in person?'  

Maddie waves goodbye and you give her a look that’s basically saying please don’t leave me. "Y/N, do you want to go get some tea?" You look at him and smile "I'd love to" although your mouth is speaking before you can even stop it.

-

You reach the tea place and you can’t help but feel extremely nervous. You order green tea and Hyungwon orders chamomile tea. He speaks first "I didn't know that was the library you worked at" you chuckle "I didn't think I'd see you there. I didn't even think I'd meet you." Your tea arrives and Hyungwon says "I know you probably hear this a lot but you look really beautiful" You can’t help but freeze and your face gets red and hot. "Thank you, I actually don't hear that a lot." Hyungwon looks surprised and asks "are you serious? Well I'll tell you more"

You look at him and say "When Maddie told me about you, I didn't think you were real. I thought you were going to be fake" He laughs and says "I thought you were fake too haha. I didn't think you'd talk to me"

-

He drives you back home and walks you to the door, "Thank you for hanging out with me Hyungwon. I had fun" He has a wide smile on his face "I had fun too. Goodnight" You look down for a second and take a deep breath "Goodnight."

Hyungwon hugs you, holds your hand and you kiss his cheek. His face gets red and he kisses your cheek as well. You haven’t felt a guy hug you or kiss you in a long time so you get frozen and your face turns a bright shade of red. Hyungwon lets your hand go and walks back to his car. You go to your room and flop down onto your bed. You grab onto your teddy bear and squeeze it tight.

You text hyungwon

~Be careful going home!

You put your phone back down and remember how his lips felt on your cheek. How soft his hand was around yours, how a few pieces of hair went in his eyes and how his face would get red whenever you’d complement him. You started thinking 'am I going to see him again?'

~I will! We should make plans to hangout again. Sleep well

You smile and fall asleep hugging your teddy bear.

-

You wake up to sun in your eyes and the sound of glass breaking in a different room. You get up and lock your door which is something you got used to doing since your dad would come back home anywhere between 3am and 10am drunk. You hear your mother yelling for him to stop. One thing on your list 'Stick up for your mother' No you weren’t close but she’s your mother.  

You unlock your door, take a deep breath and step out of your room. "Dad can you stop? You need to go to sleep okay? You've been out all night and you’re drunk" Your dad looks at you and almost raises his hand but he turns around and goes in his room and slams the door. You look at your mother as her eyes are still looking at the closed door. Her eyes look like a tear is about to drop any second. You walk back in your room and shut your door.  

You take out your notebook and look at your list. Number 4 done. You get your phone out

~Good morning Y/N. Want to get some coffee?

~Sure, I need some lol

~I’ll be there in an hour

-

You go take a shower. Put on some clothes, put makeup on, do your hair and get your bag. Hyungwon pulls up and rings your doorbell. You walk to get the door but Justin gets there first. "Can I help you?" Hyungwon smiles and says "I'm here for Y/N" Justin laughs "A guy like you shouldn't be with her. You should find a prettier girl" You walk to the door and see Hyungwon not moving. He says "She's already beautiful, maybe you shouldn't fucking talk about her like that" You grab Hyungwon’s arm "let's go..."

Hyungwon stops in front of the house "You're used to him saying that bullshit about you?" You look down "yeah. I am actually" He looks at you and hugs you. "He shouldn't say that to you"

-

You arrive at the cafe and he holds your hand as you walk inside. You end up just looking at his hand for a while. He says "can you get us a table, I think I remember what kind of coffee you like" You smile at him and sit down to wait for him to get back. You put your coat on the back of the chair and feel the cold breeze of the late November air come through the cafe door when it opens.

You look back over towards the counter and see Hyungwon walking over to you with a wide smile on his face. He puts your coffee on the table in front of you and sits down right next to you. He places his arm around you and his hands gently touches your shoulder. He looks at you and says "I got you French Vanilla with 3 sugars."  

You look at him and say "you did good haha." His smile makes your stomach go crazy, it makes you happy and feel safe. You almost sip the coffee but he puts his other hand on the coffee and says "don't drink it yet, I don't want it to burn your tongue."  

Hearing him say that makes your eyes widen. You know it’s just a few simple words but those words are a lot to you. They make your heart beat a little faster than it normally does. Those few words make you blink fast and make you keep looking back and forth from his hand and his eyes. You move your hand off of your coffee and place both of your hands on your lap. "What did you get?" You ask him in a soft voice. You're still nervous around him and looking him in the eyes is hard for you. Just him sitting that close to you makes it hard for you to breathe.  

He picks up his drink and says "Iced Americano, one of my favorites haha."  

You put your hands on your coffee to see if it's any bit cooler. The door of the cafe opens and the cold air comes in. Hyungwon looks and see's that the wind is moving your hair and that you close your eyes tight for a second. He stands up and says "switch seats with me, I don’t want the air hitting you."  

You look up at him confused but you do as he says. You move over to his seat and he sits in yours. He hands you his jacket "put this on" You put it on and Hyungwon takes your coffee and feels it "You can drink it now, it feels a little cooler" you take a sip and instantly say "It's so good. Thank you!"  

You drink more of the coffee and see Hyungwon looking at you while you’re drinking it. "Hyungwon, I'm sorry if I'm quiet while we're together. I'm just a little nervous still" You look down at your hands on your coffee and see his hand wrap around yours "Don't worry, I'm still nervous too" He takes your hand off of your coffee and wraps his fingers around yours.  

You sit there with him for a while and talk, each time his eyes meet yours you look away and get red. Each time he touches your hand, your stomach flips. You end up staying at the café longer than you planned to. But after a while you go home and end up replaying how many time’s he held your hand and how close he was to you in your head.

-

After dinner you get a text from Hyungwon

~Can you come outside? I want to go somewhere with you for a little while

~sure

You go outside and see him in his car with a goofy smile on his face waving to you. You walk to his car and get in “What did you want to do?” he smiles and kisses your cheek “it’s a surprise.”

You drive to an open area and Hyungwon steps out of the car, you unbuckle your seatbelt and get out of the car with a confused look on your face. “What are we doing here?” Hyungwon is in the backseat getting a blanket and a bag of snacks. He takes your hand and puts the blanket on the ground, “I wanted to look at the stars, it’s something I’ve always wanted to do.”  

Your eyes widen you sit down on the blanket with him. He puts his arm down for you to put your head on, you lay down beside him and look up. “Hyungwon, how many stars do you think there are?” He answers you while looking at the sky “I think around 100 billion” You look at him and see how beautiful he is, how long his eyelashes are and how some of them twirl around each other.

You think to yourself and think “number 5 for reasons to stay alive. Look at the stars”

You sit up for a second and so does Hyungwon “Are you okay Y/N?” you look at him and say “yeah, I’m okay. I like hanging out with you.” Hyungwon looks at you and pulls your face in closer, he places his lips against yours. He kisses you soft and a little hard at the same time, of course you kiss him back. After you stop kissing, he says “I’m sorry... I’ve just been wanting to do that since I first saw you”

You look at him and smile, but this smile doesn’t hurt. It feels refreshing, relaxing and good. It’s not forced, you didn’t feel any pain when smiling this time. “number 1 for things to stay alive. Smile without it hurting”

You bite your bottom lip and say “don’t be sorry, I wanted to do that too” Hyungwon kisses you one more time and says “well instead of me just kissing you... will you be my girlfriend?”

You hear the word ‘girlfriend’ and automatically feel frozen, you can’t move. But instead of you saying anything you nod but you didn’t even mean to nod. Your body does it on its own. You feel yourself freaking out slowly but Hyungwon hugs you tight and squeezes you while kissing your cheek, just making you laugh.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Will you take my problems?

Admin Ummie Words - 3k Characters - You, Jae (Day6) Genre - Fluff/ Soulmate AU (slightly) Warning - a little cursing and drinking

I honestly think this fanfic sucks but hopefully you guys don’t think so lol. The Soulmate idea I had is where all of your problems go away when you’re with your soulmate.. corny ik

You finally leave work which feels like you’ve been there for 5 years. You didn’t sleep well the night before because they had you work late. But luckily, you’re working at a café which means you can sip all of the coffee you want.  

You walk out of work with a small cup of hazel nut coffee, you take small sips letting the warmth of the coffee make your whole body slightly hot. The steam from your coffee hits your glasses and makes them get a little foggy. You stand outside of your job while the wind hits you and makes the hair from your ponytail slightly hit your face. But the fall wind makes hits your face making you scrunch your eyes. You look down the street and see your best friend Katie run up to you yelling.

“Y/N! You have to come with me! My favorite band is playing and I don’t want to go alone”

You’ve known Katie for 4 years and she’s always excited and kind of loud. Her happiness makes you happy and her smile is contagious. She’s one of the most positive people you’ve met. You two moved in together about 2 months ago and it’s been great so far. You look at her and smile still taking a few small sips of coffee.

“Katie. Please stop yelling, I just got out of work and what band?”

“oh sorry!” She takes a few breaths and continues talking “I told you about them like a thousand times. Day6 remember?”

You look at her and remember how many times she talked about that group, a local band that she loves. They don’t play shows often but she always talks about the bass player.

“I remember, when are they playing?”

“Tonight at 6! Please come with me!” She looks at you with puppy dog eyes and sticks out her bottom lip. You look at her and roll your eyes and say “Fine, it’s really last minute but I’ll go”

-You arrive back at your apartment -

You throw on a warm outfit and put a few curls in your hair. You don’t put a lot of makeup on and you throw a pair of black heel boots on as well.  

“Y/N... Are you ready?” You roll your eyes and yell back “Um... Yeah. Just need my bag.” Katie gets excited and brings you to the venue. You get inside and instantly look over at the bar and think about how good some vodka or wine would sound right about now

“Katie, I’m getting a drink. I’ll be right back” You walk over to the bar and yell to the bartender, “Can I have a watermelon vodka?”

You sit down at the bar and see a guy with light blue hair and circle framed glasses. He has a long peach shirt and black ripped jeans. He looks over at you and smiles. Of course, you smile back. You look over at him again and see he’s looking at you so you move over to a seat closer to him. He looks surprised as his eyes get wide and his face gets a little pink.

“Hi, I’m Y/N. What are you doing here tonight?”

He looks flustered as he says “I’m Jae... I’m just with my friends. What about you?”

“My friend Katie dragged me here to see a band play so I just need a drink to deal with all of the people bumping into me”

The bartender hands you your drink and Jae say’s...

“I’ll pay for it”

“O-oh no, you don’t have to. It’s fine”

Jae hands the bartender the money and continues to talk  

“Have you heard the band playing here before?” You take a sip of your drink and say “I’ve heard a few songs by them... Have you?”

He smirks and says “Yeah I’ve heard a few”

You see his friend run up to him “Jae we gotta go”

“oh, already? It was nice meeting you Y/N”

“it was nice meeting you too Jae”

Jae and his friend walk away and Katie runs up to you. “Y/N do you know who you just talked to?” You sip more of your drink and turn around to her and say “Yeah... a guy named Jae, he got me a drink. Seems like a nice guy, why?”

“He’s the lead guitarist in the group”

You look confused but you see Jae on stage with his friend and a few other people. You grab your drink and walk to the stage with Katie. Jae sees you and smiles lightly, his band member speaks up.

You look at him and smile a little bit while shaking your head.

“We’re going to play our song called ‘You were beautiful’ hope you all enjoy”

They start playing and you can’t help but move to the beat, you didn’t think Jae could sing like that. You didn’t think he’d be in the band at all. Now you see why Katie always talked about them. You and Katie dance together which makes Jae smile a little bit.

-After the show-

Jae walks over to you with a smile on his face saying “Did you like the set?” You chuckle and say “Yeah, you were amazing. I didn’t know you could sing like that.”

“haha I guess I'm alright”

As you talk you look over and see Katie talking to the bass player that she whined about earlier. She runs over to you and you look at Jae

“Um Jae, I’ll be right back”

He nods and Katie whispers to you

“Y/N I’m going to a party with the group... are you coming?”

Your eyes widen as you look at her “Probably not”

The bass player walks over to you both and asks Katie if she’s ready. She leaves and you stand there feeling way more uncomfortable than you did before. She knows you hate being alone in places with a lot of people especially people you don’t know. You feel alone and like you can’t breathe. You try to force a smile and pull yourself together.

Jae walks back to you and taps your shoulder

“Hey, I forgot to ask but I wanted to know if you wanna come to a party the band is having. It’ll be fun”

“Sure... that sounds cool”

He grabs his guitar and walks back to you, putting his hand lightly on your waist which makes you almost jump but you calm down quickly. It feels nice being with him but it’s also a little scary. As you reach his car you freeze because you haven’t been in a car with a stranger before and you obviously don’t want to be killed.

“Are you okay Y/N?”

“U-um yeah... I just haven’t been in a car with a stranger before”

“Ah well I promise I won’t hurt you”  

You give him a small smile, weirdly enough you decide to believe him as he opens the car door for you and puts his guitar in the back seat. You put your seatbelt on and hold on close to the car door. He gets in, puts his seatbelt on and starts the car but you’re watching everything he does. He notices you looking nervous and decides to play some music hoping it will calm you down.

As he drives, he looks at you to make sure you’re okay. He tries to give small talk in order to make you comfortable.

“Um... Jae, I’m sorry I’m being so quiet”

“No need to apologize. I totally understand, being in a car with a stranger is scary”

Hearing him say that made you feel a little better. For some odd reason... you trusted him even though that sounds incredibly stupid. You believed he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you.

-About 10 minutes later you arrive -

“Oh, we’re here” Jae stops the car and unbuckles his seatbelt. You do the same and wait for him to get his guitar before going inside even though there are a lot of people outside anyways. As you step inside of his house you see tons of people from the show and some people that you don't know. You see Katie with the bass player again. Jae notices that you look upset and asks "What’s wrong?"

"huh? oh nothing..."

Except you were upset at the fact that Katie left you for some guy that she didn't even know. You kind of felt betrayed. You wanted to just go up to her and slap her but you didn’t.

Jae leans in close to you and whispers to you

"We call him YoungK or Brian. You think he's handsome?" You look at Jae then look back at his friend “not my type" You say that while tapping his shoulder a little bit, Jae's face gets pink as he smiles

-

Katie looks over and sees you talking to Jae and she runs over to you "Um excuse me can I borrow her real quick?" You look at Jae and say "I'll be right back... okay?" Jae nods to you and you walk with Katie to the porch for a minute.

- Porch -

"What?"

"I just wanted to check on you and see if you're okay"

"Katie... you left me at a concert with people I didn't fucking know. I got in a car with a stranger, thankfully he didn't fucking kill me and you know how I am in places with a lot of people when I’m alone. You left me for some guy you didn’t know... but I’m okay”

Katie looks down then looks back up and looks upset

“I’m sorry... I know I fucked up, I just like him a lot. I know that was horrible of me to do”

“just don’t do it again. I was terrified in the car with him. But he seems nice”

Katie smiles widely  

“He’s really sweet... Jae seems nice too”

You chuckle and say “He is”

“I’ll come find you when I’m ready to leave, okay?”

“sure”

You two hug and walk back into the house. Katie walks back to YoungK and you walk back to Jae. Jae sees you and smiles.

“Hey, everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s good now. Just a small argument”

Jae grabs your hand and you both squeeze through the crowd of people. He brings you upstairs as you look confused wondering where he’s bringing you. He brings you to his room and you look around.

“Why’d you bring me up here?”

Jae turns around and smiles quickly as he reaches in his drawer for a bag of candy and gets two drinks from his mini fridge

“It’s too loud downstairs... it’s almost impossible to even talk to you”

“Fair enough”

He hands you the bag of candy and drinks and sits down on his bed “You can sit down”

You slowly walk to his bed and sit down beside him making sure to keep some space in between you two. You turn your head to look at him but quickly turn to look away again.

“How long have you been a group?”

“Since 2015. The rest of the group wants to tour, but I’m more interested in just playing here for now”

“Makes sense. It could be really overwhelming”

You two sit there for about 2 hours talking about nothing. Jae offers to bring you home since Katie messaged you saying someone else is bringing her.  

As you reach outside of your apartment, you sit in the car for a few minutes longer.

“Thank you for bringing me home”

“no problem. I had fun hanging out with you tonight”

“I did too...” Jae looks down and you can tell that he wants to tell you something. He speaks up and says “Can I have your number? So, we can make plans to hangout again...”

You chuckle and put your number in is phone

“text me when you get back home”

“I will... can I walk you to the door? I know I probably shouldn’t be asking haha.” The fact that he seems more nervous than you are makes you really happy. You find it extremely cute. You both get out of the car and walk to your door. He stands there with his hands in his pockets.

“thank you for walking me to the door. That was actually really sweet”

“You’re welcome.” You stand there together for a moment and look at each other. You want him to kiss you and weirdly enough you think it’s about to happen as he leans in. You nervously close your eyes and try to prepare yourself. You feel his arms wrap around you and you open your eyes and they begin to flutter. You have a confused look on your face.

“Thanks again for bringing me home Jae”

“No problem, I’ll text you when I get back home” You nod as you watch him get into his car and drive off. You turn around and go to Katies room to talk to her. “Katie?”

“COME IN” You walk in and sit on her bed covering your face asking “Am I stupid?”

“huh? No! Why?” You look down with your head in your hands and say “I thought Jae was going to kiss me, he leaned in and made it seem like it was going to happen. Or I could’ve just been overanalyzing the entire situation. A hug is better than nothing... right?”

Katie scoots closer to you “What happened?” You pick your head up and say “I was outside with Jae since he brought me back and I totally thought he was going to kiss me”

“but he didn’t?”

You say “no” and look down and pucker your lips while scrunching up your nose. Katie puts her hand on your shoulder and says “Y/N... I was talking to YoungK and he told me that Jae gets nervous a lot. Especially if he’s interested in someone, he doesn’t like to rush things. So be patient.”

“okay, thanks. Wait... why were you guys talking about us?”

Katie chuckles as she says “He asked me if I knew anything about the two of you so I wanted to ask what kind of person he was. Didn’t want you to talk to a fuck boy”

“haha thank you”  

As you two talk you feel your phone vibrate and you look at it. You see a number with no name, the text says “Hey Y/N, I’m home. Thanks for hanging out with me tonight.” You look at it and smile. Katie leans over to peak at the phone and she smiles too.

You pretty much end up talking to Jae for the rest of the night. He asks you to hangout on Friday and you sit there holding the phone to your chest trying to decide what you wanted to do. “Yes”. Pretty much meaning you’ll barely sleep for the week because you’re going to be busy worrying about when you’ll see him again. On Friday you get up early because you two originally planned to get coffee. You get dressed and wait downstairs for him to show up. Katie comes downstairs and sees you sitting there.

“Y/N... what the fuck are you doing? It’s 9 in the morning”

“Good Morning to you too. I’m getting coffee with Jae. He’s coming to get me”

Katie smiles and says “Really? Aw that’s cute. Have fun okay? Don’t overthink things... and don’t freak out. Do you have your medicine?”

-

“Okay and yes. I have it with me” You hear the doorbell ring and you look back at Katie “I’ll text you.” You walk out and Jae looks at you with a big smile on your face “Good Morning Y/N” You smile and say “Good Morning”

He hugs you tight and you feel okay enough to not let him go. He holds your hand and walks you to the car, opens your door and closes it for you. He gets inside and asks “How did you sleep?”

You look at him and say “I didn’t sleep that well actually so I’m glad we’re getting coffee. How did you sleep?”

He says “I didn’t sleep that well either... I was too nervous about seeing you today”

“aw really?” Hearing him say that makes your face hot and you smile to yourself trying not to let him see. “Yeah... there’s something about you that makes me really happy”

-You get to the café and he has you sit down-

“What do you want?”

You sit there for a second and think “Um... French Vanilla swirl with 3 sugars and creamer”

“Gotcha”

-As he walks to the counter and pays for the drinks you look at him and smile. You look in your bag and see Katie message you “Stay Positive <3”. You put your phone back and look at your pills. You put your bag back down. A few minutes later Jae walks back with the coffee-

“Thank you!” You take your coffee and sniff it letting the warmth of it hit your nose. Jae chuckles and says “You’re welcome... You look really pretty today” You look up at him slightly embarrassed and say “Really? Thank you. I didn’t get to put a lot of makeup on”

Jae looks at his coffee and says “you don’t need makeup” Those four words make butterflies fly around your stomach like crazy. Just four words and you feel like you can melt. He can just look at you and you feel like you’ll just give in to him.

“Thank you. Um did Brian say anything about Katie?”

“I actually think he likes her... he won’t stop talking about her. Katie this Katie that. He drives me crazy”

“haha I think she likes him too. She said she had fun with him last night” You pull up enough courage and ask “Is this a date?”

Jae stops sipping his iced Americano and looks down “I would like it to be.” You look at him and say “then I guess it’s a date.” Even though you asked, you got nervous, just the word ‘date’ made you nervous. You didn’t want to mess it up. You start to twirl your fingers under the table. Jae looks at you and smiles while saying “Don’t be nervous.” He takes your hand and holds it.

You look back at him and smile shyly. Jae takes a bite of the cake you both ordered and then says “I wanna take you somewhere” You look at him with a confused look and ask “now?” He chuckles and says “yeah.” You get in the car and he drives, you look out of the window and try to see where he’s taking you.

30 minutes later you get to a place that’s kind of like a mountain. You look around and see all of the trees and leaves changing color, hearing the leaves rustle as the wind hits them. The wind touches your cheeks which sends a chill through your body. You see all around New York which makes you smile, normally you would be terrified but being with Jae makes you not scared. You feel safe.

Jae walks over to you and places his hand on your waist and asks “do you like it?” You can’t stop looking around and say “I love it. It’s so pretty.” You look at Jae and see he’s already looking at you but he looks away quickly before you can say anything.

“Oh Y/N are you cold?” You keep looking at the view and ask “huh? Oh, a little bit”

Jae takes off his Jacket and holds it open for you to put your arms in. You can’t stop smiling because of how sweet he is. You put it on and say “Wait but now you’ll be cold”

“nah, I have another jacket in the car”

“Jae... normally I’d feel nervous being here. Being this high up and seeing everything like a giant would and possibly imagining the worst thing could happen but being with you makes it hard for me to be scared”

The reason you had the medicine is for your anxiety. It’s been horrible since you were young and it makes things really hard for you... Just being outside makes things hard for you. But whenever you talk to Jae, you feel like you can just be happy and not worry anymore.

Jae takes your hand and squeezes it “That’s how I feel about you too. When I’m with you I feel like I’m always happy.” Jae stands right in front of you and cups your cheeks and leans in to kiss you as the wind is blowing. You don’t feel cold, you feel warm. His lips pressing against yours makes your entire body feel warm. When he stops kissing you, you lightly bite your bottom lip and he kisses your forehead.

He holds your hand as you look at the view “You know how they say all of your problems will be gone when you find who you’re supposed to be with?” You look at him and say “yeah, I hear everyone talk about that”

He looks straight ahead while asking “what if you’re the one I’m supposed to be with?” You look at him and see his hair moving from the wind, you see his eyelashes curling around each other and the light pink tint the wind make on his cheeks. You see how his jawline is shaped and the way his hair goes slightly into his eyes. You see the way his few pieces of facial hair are growing in. You look at him and smile to yourself and say “Then you’d have to be my boyfriend.”

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Ignorance Is Bliss

[Admin Lyric: I made everyone older for the sake of the fanfiction besides Jeongin. It's A LOT longer than I planed for it to be but I hope you'll like it. Btw it's a Minsung and Minchan fic oops. Sorry not sorry.]

Characters: Minho, Jisung, Bang Chan, Rest of Stray Kids (Woojin is only mentioned)

Genre: Angst, Fluff (if you squint), attempt at humor?

Word Count: 5.7k

Warnings: Underage drinking (just really Jeongin), Language, Mentions of depression and anxiety

Minho stared out the window silently. It was open slightly letting a light breeze into the room. He listened to the whistle of the wind every time it entered through the cracked open window, the leaves on the trees shook as the wind blew. He listened. It made him feel lighter. Small and protected. Nature was pretty but the silence and tiny sounds were prettier.  

Minho closed his eyes and took a deep breath and let it back out slowly. He did it few more times before he got bored. His mind wonders too much at night and he hated it. It kept him up till an unreasonable hour. It was nice sometimes. To think about what happened throughout your day, to think about yourself, to think about...him. Not like Minho wanted to think about him, it just happened.  

Minho hated Jisung. Yeah, like every time he’d see him he wants to run up and square him right in the jaw. No, he didn’t actually want to punch him. No, he didn’t hate him either. It was more like he hated the feeling of being there for someone who you have feelings you for but they don’t know about them. He didn’t even know if he was gay. It was kind of like he knew what he was getting himself into but he really didn’t. It’s like walking out into a river without knowing how to swim… the irony.

Minho shut his eyes tighter and pulled the cover over his head. He sighed. Why was he up at 4 am thinking? Who the hell thinks at 4 am? He sighed again and turned over on his side. He grabbed his phone and opened twitter, scrolling through his timeline reading tweets about how much his followers loved someone or an idol. He sighed again. Can’t he catch a fucking break? He tossed his phone somewhere in the dark, not really caring if it cracked or not. He closed his eyes again and listened to the sounds that he admired so much and took deep breaths again.  

He started drifting off to sleep when HE popped into his head again. He threw his body onto his stomach and yelled into his pillow. He prayed to god Chan didn’t hear him or he’d be getting yelled at in a good few minutes. Chan gets cranky easily when he doesn’t sleep which is almost all the time. That’s when Minho forced himself to sleep even if he was thinking about way too much things, he had to get at least some sleep.

2 hours of sleep was good enough, he thought out loud. He had morning classes anyways. Minho groggily got out of his bed and stumbled his way into his dorm's kitchen. Chan was awake as per usual sitting at the kitchen table writing in a notebook. 

“Looks like someone didn’t sleep again.” Minho rolled his eyes and opened the refrigerator to find… well nothing but water and soda. His stomach growled loudly and he opened one of the cabinets and grabbed some instant ramen.

“Looks like someone needs to mind their own fucking business before someone else loses their shit.” Chan looked up and raised an eyebrow. 

“Woah, who hurt you?” Minho ignored his poor attempt at asking him what was wrong and watched his ramen rotate in the microwave. Chan got up and walked over towards Minho and grabbed a Pepsi that was sitting on the counter opened. Minho gagged at the thought of warm flat soda. Chan jumped up to sit on the counter failing a few times. 

“Is this about Jisung?” Ah how much Minho hated that name. He stopped stirring his soon to be eaten ramen and stared at Chan with an ever so slightly annoyed grin. 

“No. And earlier didn’t I tell you to mind your-“ 

“Own fucking business? Yeah, I heard you loud and clear. And for the record I do recall you telling me a few weeks ago that you’d tell me how you were feeling if you were ever ‘like this’ again?” Chan motioned his hands up and down pointing towards Minho. He sighed and put his ramen on the table, appetite long gone since Chan said the name Jisung.  

“Look, if you’re uncomfortable just tell me, I'll shut up.” Minho looked at Chan and smiled halfheartedly and got up. He through his ramen away and walked back into his room to get ready for his classes. What has he gotten himself into? He knew that Chan knew he liked Jisung but every time his name was said aloud in their small dorm, he always felt sick and nauseous. Why? He didn’t really know. 

Minho felt like the walk to uni was so long but it was only about 10 minutes away. He hates being alone. His thoughts get jumbled up easily and he becomes very vulnerable to himself and shuts his friends out when he feels self-cautious. He hated it so much to the point where it scared him and makes him more anxious. That’s why he usually has Chan walk with him in the morning but he didn’t go to class with him today because he had a lot of inspiration for his music so he was skipping. Chan wasn’t one for skipping but when it came to his music, he didn’t give a shit. 

Minho kicked at the gravel under his feet and walked slowly. Mayhaps he should hurry up? He felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped so hard he almost fell. He screeched like a little bitch too which was really embarrassing. It was hard for him to even look to his left until he heard a chuckle. He frayed his eyebrows together and looked down at his shoes, at least it was just Hyunjin. He was one of Jisung’s closest friends next to him, Felix, and Seungmin. He may or may not be dating Changbin. 

“Hyung, I called your name at least 5 times. You okay?” Minho looked in Hyunjin’s direction and smiled. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. Not fine but just enough to be getting through life.” Hyunjin nodded softly and looked a little worried but decided not to say anything.

“How’ve you been? You look like you lost some weight.” Hyunjin walked a little slower and nodded his head. 

“I’ve been great. I’m caught up with all my work finally and now I can just focus on our dance project. I skipped a lot of meals because of me constantly cramming to get work done. Jisung threatened to beat me with a frying pan if I didn’t eat.” Minho tried his hardest not to laugh but it came out so abruptly he spat all over Hyunjin’s face. Hyunjin had closed his eyes and wiped his face slowly as Minho laughed harder due to Hyunjin’s expression. 

“I had JUST washed my face bro!” Minho was holding his knees gasping to breathe from how hard he was laughing. He felt himself shaking and looked up at Hyunjin who had a displeased facial expression.  

“It wasn’t supposed to be funny, you were supposed to comfort me about Jisung being a dick.” Hyunjin pouted. Minho stood up properly and wiped off the tears that had ran down his face. “I’m sorry. I just can’t see that happening. Seungmin though, probably.” 

Hyunjin shrugged and started walking again. “Jisung’s mean to me sometimes, you just don’t see it because you’re blinded by your love for him.” Minho stopped walking and frowned. He ran up to Hyunjin and shoved him into the street. Hyunjin laughed evilly and walked about 2 feet in front of him to not get pushed again. Minho’s nausea set in again. Damn the fact that there wasn’t any traffic. 

Once he and Hyunjin were outside of the university, that’s when he heard yells and shouts from behind them. He heard his name a few times but decided not to turn around knowing it’d be his friends which meant Jisung was there. Hyunjin was the first to react and dragged Minho with him by the wrist. Minho was shaking his head violently. He tried to get out of his grip but Hyunjin was a lot stronger then he looked. 

“Why do you look like you got in trouble?” Felix laughed and put his hands in his pockets. Minho rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Shut up. You know nothing.” Felix let out an exaggerated gasp and put a hand on his chest. Seungmin eyed Minho curiously and turned his head towards Hyunjin. 

“Is he okay?” Hyunjin shrugged. 

“He spit on me earlier so I'm kind of pissed.” 

“THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT!” 

“It still happened.” Minho rolled his eyes again. He could see Jisung through his peripheral vision. He was scared to talk to him but he really, really wanted to.  “Tsk tsk. You spit on your friends now? That’s low.” Minho looked over at Jisung slowly and glared at him. 

“Says that one that threatened to beat their friend with a frying pan. Put an acorn in it squirrel boy.” Jisung’s eyes widened clearly not offended but surprised. 

“Hyunjin told you that!? You little fucker!” Felix ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. 

“Wow Jisung. I didn’t know you’d stoop so low. Don’t be on Seungmin’s level.” Seungmin smacked Felix on the back of his head and he yelped. Felix smiled a little too sweetly touching his head lightly. Jisung cooed at him and pinched his cheeks. Felix blushed and shooed Jisung away from his face. Minho rolled his eyes and turned around. “I’m leaving you morons.” 

He heard his friends groan. He giggled and shook his head. He felt an arm be put in between his body and his own arm. He looked to his right and saw Jisung smiling at him cutely. His heart stammered and he forgot how to breathe for a moment. Jisung’s smile was pure sunlight and he wanted nothing more than to look at it all day.  

“Hyung, you look nice today.” Jisung put his head on Minho’s shoulder. He looked away and let out a soft “thank you.” His face was probably red as fuck because Hyunjin started laughing at him. Minho flipped him off and continued to walk with Jisung. The only thought that was on his mind was how warm Jisung felt beside him.

Dancing was Minho’s escape. From reality and from his own emotions. Lately it seemed like all he did was run from everything. His friends, his family, himself. He just ignored everything that bothered him which is why he tried to avoid Jisung a lot. He shook his head and ran his hands up and down his face. He should focus on this not-so-easy-choreography and not think about things like that. He took his hands away from his face and was met with a pair of pretty sparkly brown eyes. He knew they belonged to Jisung and he kind of panicked because how close they were. Jisung sat in front of Minho and handed him a water bottle. Minho took it and chugged it like he hadn’t drank anything for days. 

“You look stressed. Anything you wanna talk about?” Minho looked at Jisung and thought, yes, I’m stressed. You look beautiful right now and I would do anything to tell you that I love you but I'm scared you might reject me and our friendship will come to an end. Minho shook his head and decided on a simple “no, I'm fine.” Jisung raised an eyebrow at this but let it go. He scooted closer to Minho and put his head in his lap. Minho’s heart felt like it was going to combust with how cute he looked. 

“Did you wanna hangout after this? I don’t have anything to do and I don’t wanna be bored for the rest of the day.” Minho nodded without thinking about the consequences that were going to follow him till he was about to sleep. Jisung smiled brightly and sat up, out stretching his arms so Minho could hug him which he gladly accepted. Jisung fit right into his chest and he was having a hard time trying to hold himself back from kissing him. Jisung snuggled into the crook of Minho’s neck and stayed there for a while on his phone. They were sweaty but he didn’t really care. Minho stared and took in the perfection that was Jisung’s face. His eyes were gorgeous. They were big but not too big, they sparkled when he looked at something he found pretty, they lit up and shined bright when he talked about music and dance. The crinkles by his eyes when he smiled so brightly. The sun worked hard but Han Jisung worked harder. He wanted so badly to kiss the tip of his nose, it was so boop-able. He wanted to actually physically kiss him. His lips were really pretty. Cherry red and always smelled like mint Chapstick. His natural pout was cute, all Minho wanted do was kiss him all over his entire face as much as could till he-

“What’s wrong?” Minho’s eyes widened. He looked at Jisung dumbly and blinked a few times. 

“What?” Jisung rolled his eyes and smirked. “You were staring.” 

That’s when the embarrassment set in and his face turned crimson. He would say it was from dancing but he knew it wasn’t true. Minho coughed a few times which turned into a fit of nervous laughter.  

“I was just thinking about our uhh...dance! Yeah, I-I forgot some of the moves and I need to go o-over them again when we uhh...start dancing again.” Jisung giggled and nodded his head. His giggles were music to Minho’s ears. 

“Okay hyung.” That definitely sounded sarcastic. Minho’s expression changed from anxious to confused to even more anxious in a few seconds.  “You’re cute when you blush.” Minho touched his face and it was indeed hot. Not warm but fever hot. He stood up slowly, trying not to disturb Jisung from being comfortable, and made an excuse to use the bathroom. 

Minho has never run so fast in his entire life. 

Minho knew Jisung was a relatively clingy person but it just didn’t feel right. He always felt special whenever Jisung hugged him or cuddled him or held his hand, but he did that to everyone. Minho sighed and ran a hand in his hair and pulled his knees close to his chest. Why did it hurt so much to think about him and talk to him? His chest felt tight and his lungs refused air. He felt like he was drowning. Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. He hated himself. It seemed liked something so easy to do yet seemed like he was walking on thin ice. The thought of losing one of closet best friends was scary and he didn’t want to lose the tight bond he created with Jisung because of his stupid feelings. He loved him too much to think about the possibility of Jisung hating him for the rest of his life or just straight up avoiding him. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be at dance right now?” Minho looked to his right and saw Changbin. He was one of Chan’s close friends and his own. They all made music together sometimes and helped each other out when they needed it most. 

“Yeah, I just...wanted to be alone for a bit.” Changbin nodded. 

“Are you okay? I'll leave if you want me to.” Minho shook his head quickly. “No, you’re fine. And no, I'm not okay.” Changbin’s expression softened and he changed his seated position on the small sofa to look at Minho better. 

“I-I really like Jisung. No, I love him. You already know that but I just don’t know what to do. I don’t know if he even likes guys. It sounds stupid to be depressed about this but all my life I've been scared of rejection and being alone. Ever since I came out to my parents they rejected me. They ignored me and waited for me to graduate high school so they could throw me out and into college. I didn’t have close friends besides Chan, you and Jisung. I was lonely then but you 3 made me feel better and loved. I don’t wanna risk that because of my stupid feelings.” At this point Minho had tears running down his face and his body was shaking. Changbin held back his tears, leaned forward and grabbed Minho pulling him into his chest. Minho broke out crying in loud sobs. Changbin rubbed his back and let him cry till he heard quiet sniffles. Chan had gravitated towards they’re living area. He traded his spot with Changbin’s. 

“Minnie. I love you. Please don’t let yourself feel like this. I know that you’re scared but I think it’d be better if you told him how you felt. Even if Jisung doesn’t feel the same way, we’re always right here.” Changbin nodded and added on. Chan ran a hand through Minho’s hair, an action he usually does to calm him down. 

“And I'm pretty sure even if he wasn’t to return your feelings, I doubt he’d hate you.” Minho sighed and put his face deeper into Chan’s chest. He eventually lifted his head up slowly. Chan’s face softened and it took everything in him to not cry or go and tell Jisung himself because he hated seeing his best friend in his arms crying. He hated it more than he hated seeing his music unfinished after falling asleep.  

“I got your shirt wet... sorry.” Chan rolled his eyes and chuckled. 

“That’s what you’re worried about?” 

“Just give him time, he might not wanna talk about it.” Chan nodded. Changbin had tried giving Minho a kiss on his head but he swatted him away. Chan asked Changbin if he could talk to Minho by himself which Changbin complied to, shuffling to the bathroom quietly. Minho was sat on his knees and had his hands in his lap. He looked really vulnerable and made Chan kind of pissed off that Jisung hadn’t realized that Minho loved him. Is it really that hard to not see someone pinning for you? Yes. 

“Minho-yah. I want what’s best for you but if you really, physically can’t tell Jisung that you love him, then just say it through text or through a letter maybe? I just don’t want you to have to deal with the suffering feeling of him dating someone else or wanting to without getting the chance to tell him about your feelings first.” Minho nodded slowly then stopped and stared Chan dead in his eyes. 

“Why are you giving me advice about something that you never felt?” Chan’s eyes widened. He mumbled out some lame excuse about his friend having something like this happen to him but Minho wasn’t buying it. 

“Hyung. Are you-” Chan’s phone rung loudly from his back pocket. Hold Me Tight. One of Minho’s favorite BTS songs. He didn’t remember Chan ever listening to BTS besides when he played them out loud and sang stupidly. Chan was more into western hip hop and rap which suited him. Chan answered his phone quickly. He excused himself from the room and walked into his bedroom. Minho just sat there confused. What was Chan hiding from him? He was always the one that had Minho open up and he told him whenever he was depressed so why was he being so... weird?  Minho texted Jisung and told him he wasn’t feeling good and they should hangout some other time. His phone lit up but he didn’t bother looking at it, staring into Chan’s bedroom. 

“So, you’re going to Woojin hyung’s party.” Minho rolled his eyes. Of course he’s not gonna go. He hasn’t spoken to Jisung in 2 days and he might be there, he’d rather not risk going and seeing him. 

“Hyung. Did you not hear me? I said no, I'm not going so stop asking. Do I need to say it in English?” Chan leaned his head back and sighed loudly.  

“That really wasn’t a question, it was more of a demand but...” Minho whined and put his pillow over his face. Why can’t he just... I don’t know LISTEN?  “Look, I don’t have clean clothes so that’s one thing.” He felt something soft land on his stomach and jumped slightly not knowing what it was. 

“There. Now get fucking dressed mate, we don’t have all night.” Minho moved the pillow from his face and yelled. He yelled as in not screaming but just because. Chan kicked his leg lightly. “Do you wanna get us kicked out?” 

“Yes. More you than me.” Chan hit Minho on his thigh and he kicked his leg out only to miss and fall off of his bed. Chan laughed loudly while Minho just sat on the floor with his arms crossed. 

“Don’t check to see if I'm okay or anything you dick.” Chan walked back over to Minho and helped him up still laughing. 

“uuHH! I fucking hate you!” 

“No, you LOVE ME!” 

Minho sat in the corner on some shitty sofa that was just thrown there for more people to sit down. He took a deep breath and immediately regretted it. The air was filled with smoke. Fake smoke and real smoke. Maybe he should drink more. He might not be bothered by it too much if he was shit faced.

“heeeYYYYY hyung!” Minho looked at the kid in front of him. He looked about 16 or 17. Way too young to be at a party like this. His face looked really familiar and it bothered him way too much. Minho’s eyes widened. Why was Jeongin here? 

“Hi?” Jeongin sat down next to Minho and leaned his head on his shoulder. He reeked of alcohol and it kind of burned Minho’s nose.  

“Why are you here? And why the hell are you drinking?” Jeongin shrugged and sat up. “Beacause Seungmin’s my brother? AND Jisung isn’t here so I did him a favor by drinking for him!” 

Minho let out breath of relief and disappointment. He wondered why Jisung didn’t go. He knew he didn’t like parties but he usually came because his friends went, which caused Minho to go because he hated parties as well.

“Whatz wong? You saaad cuz ur boyfrind sn’t here?” Minho rolled his eyes. Jeongin’s words were so slurred it was almost impossible to understand what he was saying. His mom is gonna beat the shit outta him. 

“No, I’m not sad and he’s not my boyfriend.” Jeongin laughed more than necessary and began coughing. Minho rolled his eyes again. It seemed like all he did was roll his eyes at his dumb ass friends. He chugged the rest of what was left over in his cup and got up to get another. He felt arms circle around his middle and he turned his head slightly and saw a flop of curly hair. 

“You don’t look like you’re having fun.” Minho’s face scrunched up at the nasty taste of whatever-the-fuck-was-in-this-cup.  

“Duh. I never said I wanted to come, I just came because you forced me to.” Chan shook Minho a little and caused him to smile. “That’s what I wanted to see.” Minho leaned his head back and downed his drink for the 2nd time. Chan shook his head. 

“Don’t drink like that, you’ll get fucked up.” Minho turned around in Chan’s hold and put his arms around his neck. Minho swore he saw Chan blush but maybe it was just the alcohol. 

“Don’t be such a buzzkill. You told me to have fun so that’s what I’m doing.” He whispered the last part quietly but loud enough for Chan to hear over the music playing. “By getting yourself blacked out drunk?” Minho nodded feeling a bit lightheaded from the alcohol already. He did have a low alcohol tolerance so he didn’t need to drink much to get drunk but he was going to anyway. Normal people would call this a distraction from Jisung but he didn’t want to acknowledge it as such. It made him feel weak and emotional. Unable to deal with things that happen in day to day life.  

“Loosen up hyung. Here.” Minho grabbed two drinks, one for himself and handed the other to Chan. He took it begrudgingly and watch as Minho downed his 3rd drink like it was water. He coughed a few times then wiped off his mouth.  

“Uhhh, I’m gonna go look for Woojin hyung, do you wanna come?” Chan sounded utterly nervous to leave Minho by himself but he shook his head. 

“Nahhh. I’m gonna go dance or somthin’.” Chan nodded slowly and watched Minho disappear into the crowd of sweaty bodies. Why did he let him do that? Minho eventually got bored of dancing and people trying to grind onto him so he went outside and sat on what seemed to look like steps. His head spun and pulled out his phone from his pocket and unlocked it? Yeah, that’s what it's called. He dialed a number that seemed way too familiar for his liking and put the phone up to his ear. It started ringing and someone picked up on the other line. 

“Hello?” Minho sat silently and stared at his shoes till he remembered he was on the phone. 

“OHH! Hi Jisungie.” Minho heard Jisung giggle from the other end. 

“What did you call for?” 

“I wanted to tell you something. You haaaaave to keep it a secret... OKAY!?” 

“Are you drunk?” Minho ignored him and kept going. 

“Han Jisung. I love you. Sooo sooo much. I *hiccup* have always loved you and I just wanted to let you know. You mean the *hiccup* world to me and you’re so cute and funny and you look like an ang- angle?” 

“An angel?” 

“Yeah that!” 

“W-where are you right now?” That’s was the last thing Minho heard before he was out like a light. 

Minho felt sick to his stomach. Jisung texted him earlier asking him if they could “talk.” Minho knew what it was about and frankly, he was gonna say no because he was scared. The nagging voice in the back of his mind told him he should go because he knew he needed to provide Jisung an explanation about the phone call. He hasn’t spoken to him since then. Minho sighed and sat down on a bench next to the place Jisung said he wanted to talk to him at. He came early because he needed some time to relax himself before he talked to him. 

He thought back to the morning after the party. Everything was fresh in his mind and he cried. He was sure he messed up and Jisung hated him. Chan came to comfort him and asked what happened. He got pissed off when Minho told him he called Jisung and told him he loved him. He said he should’ve stayed with him and maybe he wouldn’t feel like how he did. Minho sighed. Why did Chan blame himself for things that happened to him? Chan can’t control what Minho does. He was so lost in thought that he hadn’t seen Jisung standing in front of him. He sat down on Minho’s left and turned his head towards his direction. Minho gulped. He prayed Jisung didn’t hear it. 

“You know why I want to talk to you right?” Minho nodded. It was hard for him to say words at the moment. 

“Well...I don’t really know what to say...right now...” Minho opened his mouth to say a sentence that he practiced on saying to Jisung but it didn’t come out, other words did. 

“I love you Jisung. I have for a while and I don’t know when it happened but when I was drunk I was telling the truth...I’m sorry...I-” Minho cut himself off because he could feel himself getting chocked up and he didn’t want to cry in front of Jisung. 

“Don’t apologize, I should be the one apologizing.” Minho raised an eyebrow. Why did he need to apologize? “I never once noticed and I...I just feel stupid. I love you too hyung...but...” Minho knew he wasn’t going to get the answer he wanted. He expected it. He really wondered why he got his hopes up so high. He took a deep breath through his nose. His heart hurt more. It felt like it was cracking. 

“I don’t love you like how you love me...I-I’m sorry I feel...” Jisung’s eyes were glistening and Minho tried hard not to stare but he looked like he was about to cry. Jisung took a deep breath and let it back out. 

“Felix asked me out a few days ago but I never said anything because I was worried about you. I-I do like him...but... It’s not gonna be weird-” Minho shook his head. He had to leave soon or he’d break down outside and that’s something he never wanted experience. He hated people staring at him as it is. 

“No. It’s gonna be okay. Just say yes. If you like him, then you like him. You can’t control your feelings.” Jisung nodded. He scooted over to Minho and gave him a hug whispering “I’m sorry” into his ear. Minho was the one to break the hug first. Jisung stood up and so did Minho. He gave him another hug which was longer, Minho didn’t wanna let him go but he did.  

“Are you gonna be okay?” 

“Yeah. I’m- I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.” Minho rubbed his hands on his pants to rid of the sweat on them. A thing he did when he was nervous or needed a distraction. Jisung gave him a lopsided smile and waved him goodbye. Minho watched as his back faded away in the distance. A tear slid past his right eye but he was quick to wipe it off. He smiled and ran all the way back to his dorm. 

Chan was seated on the sofa when Minho walked back inside. Chan snapped his head in his direction when he heard the door shut. Minho said nothing. He just stood there staring at his shoes. Chan walked over to Minho and put a hand on either side of his shoulders. Minho looked up at Chan. He hugged him. Chan hugged him back right away. Minho tried his hardest not cry but his heart felt like it was ripped out and stepped on. It’s not like he didn’t expect to get rejected but the thought of Jisung and Felix together made everything 10 times worse. He loved them both. Shouldn’t he be happy for them? He didn’t realize Chan brought him over to the sofa. Minho held onto him tighter. Chan made him sit on his lap. 

“It’s okay to cry Minnie.” Minho felt numb. He felt like he had to cry, but nothing came out. Chan rubbed his back and hugged him tighter. 

“Hyung. It hurts. But I don’t feel like I have the right to cry.” Chan sighed. His heart felt heavy as Minho said those words.  

“You have the right to cry more than anyone else. I know it hurts and its okay to cry. It only hurts worse when you hold it in.” Minho sat up and stared at Chan for what seemed to be a whole minute. 

“What?” 

“Why do keep doing that?” 

“Doing what?” 

“Acting like you know how I feel. You don’t so stop giving me advice! If want to make me feel better then just comfort me!” Minho didn’t mean to yell at him. He didn’t mean anything he said but on some level he did. Chan rolled his eyes and looked back at Minho. A bunch of emotions filled his eyes, things he couldn’t decipher, things he didn’t like seeing. It sent a shiver down his spine.

“Out of all the people you know I should be the one to relate most to you because I've felt like this for years, so don’t think I don’t know how you feel.” Minho’s eyes widened and his face softened. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-” 

“No, you’re fine. How would you have known that I’ve been in love with you for a long time? I never told you.” It was quiet for a while. Minho felt his face burning. How was he blushing when he felt like he was dying? He has never heard someone confess to him before, it was usually the other way around. Never was it his best friend either. Chan smiled lightly. 

“I know you love Jisung. I know it’s gonna take time for you get over him but I can wait. Only if you let me.” Minho felt tears running down his face he put his face into Chan’s chest and a loud sob came from his throat. Why did he tell him he loved him now? Why was he even complaining? He raised his head a little and tried to calm his crying. 

“Christopher Bang! AH! I hate you! Seriously!” Chan threw his back and laughed. Minho smiled at Chan and wiped his tears away. 

“Okay. I’ll let you.” Chan stopped laughing and brought his head back forward slowly. Eyes big and hopeful. 

“Really?” Minho nodded and turned his head, blushing a bit. Chan hugged Minho so tight he thought he might have broken one of his ribs. Chan smiled brightly, his dimples showing. Minho smiled back. He put his head into the side of Chan’s neck. Chan arms settling on Minho’s waist out of habit. Minho felt stupid. He never noticed all the things Chan did for him weren’t just out of friendship, but out of love and Minho was grateful for that. Jisung must have felt like this too. Chan on the other hand had probably been hurting for a long time and Minho never noticed because he was caught up in his own feelings. He was going to make it up to Chan. Make up for all the things he should’ve done when Chan felt depressed and helpless. He wanted to feel alive again and he was gonna do it no matter what. He was gonna do it with Chan. Minho tapped on Chan’s shoulder making him look at him.  

“Let’s be happy, yeah?” Chan nodded. Minho mustered up all the courage he had when he was drunk that one night and kissed him. 

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Late Night Cuddles and Colds

[Admin Lyric: Here’s a Bang Chan fanfiction to sooth your worries although I’m sure that’s not gonna happen completely because I’m pretty sure some of yall are pressed about them not putting their teaser pics up yet. Believe me I’m pissed too. ]

“I told you you’d get sick if we stayed outside for too long! You didn’t even have a fucking coat!” 

“You’ll take care of me though, right?”

Characters: Bang Chan, Han Jisung, Hwang Hyunjin

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 2.9k

Warnings: None

You didn’t want to but you had to drag your poor boyfriend out of his cramped studio so that he could eat and sleep properly. He needs it and you think you stressed it enough to him the past few times this has happened. You were honestly just glad that you were able to get him out this time considering all the other times he forced you to stop asking him to get up and leave with you. It was cold out and of course he didn’t have a coat but only a pull over and nothing underneath. You were lucky that Jisung had called you in time before it got to be after 2 am again. You wondered how long he was there for, being it was only 11 p.m.  

You were having quite a bad day. You had so much class work you had to finish that it was stressing you out and you were unable to focus when you got to your part time job. You were also pretty tired from trying to get all the work done that you accidentally fell asleep and got yelled at by your boss. You were worried that you’d get fired. You were just glad that you were able to get out of work a half hour earlier than usual. She was pissed and wanted nothing to do with you at the moment.

You walked outside and the wind hit you like a ton of bricks. It wasn’t freezing but you were pretty sure it was cold enough for it to start snowing. You pulled your scarf up so it would cover you face a bit and shoved your hands deep into your pockets.

You haven’t been walking for that long when your phone started to ring. It was Jisung. You thought it was a little weird because he usually wasn’t one for calling people, but one for sending people memes and forgetting to text you back. You shrugged and picked up to a very aggressive yelling. He was talking pretty fast. You honestly didn’t know if he was rapping or talking.

“Y/N!! GET CHAN OUT OF THAT FUCKING STUDIO!! YOU HAVE TO OR I’LL SET IT ON FIRE! I’LL DO IT Y/N, I MEAN IT! HE NEEDS TO EAT BECAUSE HE HASN’T AND HE’S BEEN REFUSING-“

“Woah, WOAH, slow down Jisung… tell me what happened, just say it slower.“ It was hard to understand him through his yelling and his thick Korean accent. You had caught your boyfriends name in his yelling that it made you nervous. You didn’t realize that you were biting your nails on your opposite hand.  

"Chan hyung. He’s been in that damn studio all day and hasn’t eaten. We even tried to persuade him that you were with us but he saw through our lie.” You sighed. You wished that Chan wasn’t so stubborn.

“I’ll get him. I just got out for work so I’m not that far from him.” You heard him sigh into his phone.

“Thank you. Sorry I yelled, he just doesn’t listen to anyone else besides you.” You nodded slowly, knowing he wouldn’t be able to see you through your phone.

“No problem Sungie, I’ll bring him back to you.” He wished you good luck and hung up. You sighed again and started walking towards were Chan was.

When you arrived, you knocked on the door but he didn’t answer. The door was unlocked this time so you opened it and walked in slowly. He didn’t notice your presence till you tapped on his shoulder. He took his headphones off then spun around in his chair. His face immediately lit up while yours dimed. He looked awful. You could tell he hadn’t gotten enough sleep in while, the bags under his eyes being a prominent sign. You knew he was hungry but refusing to eat due to stress. You tried not show that you were worried but he could tell right away.

"Babe, what’s wrong?” You shook your head indicating that you were fine but in fact you weren’t. He sighed then made you sit on his lap.

“Did the members…tell you? That I’ve been here all day?” You nodded and Chan sighed again. You were too scared to actually say words because you thought if you did, you’d end up crying.

“I-I’m sorry, I just really need to finish these few songs and I’ll be done, I promise.” You shook your head and stood up. You grabbed him by his arm till he was on his feet. You then tried to pull him out of the door but to no avail, he was a lot stronger than you. He chuckled as you made your way to his back and began to push. Again, he didn’t budge. You huffed then went to his computer, saving all of his work and turned it off, all in the process of him telling you to not touch anything.

“Y/N, I’m not leaving.” You rolled your eyes and pushed away some of hair so you can kiss his forehead. Then you kissed his nose, then finally his lips. His hands found your waist almost immediately and brought your body closer to his. Your arms wrapped around his neck and you let you fingers card through his hair. You loved his soft curly hair that you couldn’t help yourself but to touch it. He hummed at the feeling of your fingers running through his hair. You pulled away slowly leaving a reminder of what the kiss felt like, which made Chan distracted and easier for you to drag him out of the studio and into the cold night.

You tried to ignore his complaining the whole time about how he needed to go back soon to finish this and finish that. You stop walking and turned around.

“Chris Bang. You are NOT going back to that studio tonight. You need to eat and sleep.”

“But I have to finish these 2 songs, they were almost-“

“CHAN! NO! I don’t care how close you were to finishing your songs, I’m taking you to your dorm.” He quickly shut up but pouted. You rolled your eyes but pecked his lips quickly before you started walking again. You felt a pair of arms snake their way around your waist and you grinned widely.

“I’m cold but you’re so warm.” You barely made out what Chan said, his voice being muffled by your coat. He let go of you as quickly as he clinged onto you and ran somewhere off in the distance.  

“Chan what the hell are you doing!?” You cupped your hands around your mouth so he could hear you better. You didn’t get an answer back but instead a bone crushing hug that scared the shit out of you. You laughed as he lifted you up in the air and swung you around. He put you down after getting a little dizzy and just stared at you. His chocolate brown orbs sparkled and danced in the dim moonlight. His eyes were hypnotic, putting you in a trance, sharing the same expression he wore with no words exchanged.

Chan went from sexy and mischievous to cute and small with just one smile. You cooed at him before he ran off again somewhere. This time, you decided to follow him.

“Let’s play tag.” You scoffed as you listened to his words. Why did he want to play tag? Wasn’t he still mad about you dragging him out his studio? You had to remind yourself that he was practically a 7-year-old inside a 20-year old’s body.  

“You’ll get sick if you run around without a coat.“ He smiled at you fondly and walked up to you slowly.

"Love, I promise I’ll be careful.” He tapped you softly on the arm and said ‘tag, you’re it’ and ran off into the distance at lightning speed. You called out to him so that he could slow down. You tried your best to keep up with him.

You stopped when you saw Chan near a tree looking out of breath and decided to leave him be. You hesitated for a bit but then went over to him anyway. You tapped on him the same way he did earlier and said “tag, you’re it,” and ran away as fast as you could. You felt his hands on your arms. You stumbled and fell, closing your eyes in the process. You opened your eyes slowly to see that you were laying on top of Chan. You looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back at you. The both of you bursted into laughter.  

You both stayed in each other’s arms for few minutes. The sky looked beautiful despite it being cold out. Chan had his arms wrapped around you tightly. You thought you’d fall asleep if he kept you in his arms for any longer. You looked back up at him to see him staring back at you. You blushed. Chan kissed the top of your head.

“Don’t fall asleep on me love.” You giggled and began to stand up. Chan pouted and stretched his arms out to you. You smiled and grabbed his hand to help him up but he just laid there in the same position.

“Come baaaack~” You shook your head.

“It’s 11:48 and I don’t want us to fall asleep on the ground. Plus, you don’t have proper layers on.” Chan whined but then got up and wrapped his arms around your waist again.

“How are we supposed to walk to go get food like this?” You felt him shrug.

“We’ll find out, we got this.” You chuckled and began walking to your destination with Chan in tow.

You arrived at Stray Kids’ dorm later than you wanted to. You both ate slowly and talked for what seemed like an hour or so. Chan was slowing you down with him back hugging you the whole way there but you didn’t mind. You really couldn’t blame him either, it was cold. He insisted that you both should stay outside longer but you were worried about his health.

“Y/N, please?”

“No.”

“But-”

“No, its too cold. It’ll only get colder out.” Chan sighed. He then proceeded to make you sit on his lap while sitting on the steps outside. You shook your head, afraid of getting caught by some fans. He pouted again but stood up and followed you towards the door. You texted Seungmin and told him that you would be back soon with Chan but he never answered your text. You prayed they didn’t fall asleep because Chan didn’t have his key with him.

“Just sit and wait instead of standing up.” You looked over and saw he was no longer on your right but sitting again. He looked tired, maybe that’s why he kept wanting to sit and lay down.

You screeched when you felt a hand on your shoulder. You were facing Chan so who the hell was behind you? You turned around slowly to see Hyunjin, eyes half closed if not fully closed, with the door open. 

“Seungmin hyung told me to open the door for you… why did you come back so late? People need their beauty sleep.” He tried to look as mad as possible and crossed his arms but looked more like he’d fall over any second. 

“Hyunjin, you know you have a facemask on still.” Chan tried not to laugh from behind you. Hyunjin’s eyes widened and he touched his face. He immediately took his phone out of his back pocket and looked at himself. 

“Why did I put the panda one on?”  

“You look cute.” Hyunjin looked back up at you and smiled. Chan gave you a kiss on the right side of your cheek. 

“I’m cuter though right?” You laughed and tilted your head back far enough to see him. You nodded and he pecked your lips a few times before he let you put your head back up. Hyunjin’s face was one of overexaggerated disgust. 

“Just because you two are together doesn’t mean I want to see you kiss all the time.” Chan stuck his tongue out at him and Hyunjin rolled his eyes and walked away. 

“I’ll lock you guys out if you don’t come in!”  

You sat on Chan’s bed and waited for him to get out the shower. You ended up lying on you back, staring at the ceiling. You started dozing off a bit since you were pretty sure it was about 1 almost 2 am. You had a long day but you wanted to wait for your boyfriend. He’s been so busy lately, you felt as if it’s been years since you’ve last seen him. You felt a weight on top of you, it smelled like shampoo and expensive body gel. You opened your eyes slowly to the cutest sleepy boy you’ve ever seen. Chan smiled widely at you. The corners of his eyes crinkled as his smile widened, his cute dimples showing in the process. You grabbed his face and kissed where his dimple was on his right cheek, then kissed the other. He giggled lightly and hugged you tighter. You laughed as he started shaking you violently.  

“Why didn’t you go to sleep? I know you’re tired.” You shook your head lightly and put your arms around his waist.  “I wanted to wait for you. I haven’t seen you in like a month because of how busy we always are. I miss you.” Chan frowned and hugged you tighter if that was even possible. 

“I missed you too. Maybe I shouldn’t listen to my members more often so that I can see you like everyday.” He chuckled lightly. You tried not to laugh but ended up laughing harder than you thought you should’ve and snorted. You quickly stopped and covered your face embarrassed which resulted in Chan laughing cutely and trying to get your attention. 

“Baby, don’t be embarrassed. It was cute!” You pushed him off of you and rolled in the opposite direction of him but he followed you anyway. He climbed over you again and lied next to you this time. Your limbs tangled with his almost immediately. He kissed the tip of your nose. You giggled softly.  

“Have I ever told you how much I loved you?” Your face flushed a light scarlet and you grinned. How did he still make you feel like this?  

“Y-yeah, you tell me everyday. I love you more though~~” Chan widened his eyes and shook his head smiling brightly.  

“Not even possible love.” His eyes shined with admiration and nothing but pure love for you. You felt the butterflies in you stomach had woken and left you feeling giddy. It felt like you had just fallen in love with him all over again. He was so… himself. He cupped your face gently and brought his lips to yours in a soft gentle kiss. You were the first one to pull away only for you to peck his lips 4 more times before you cuddled into his side. Chan brushed some hair out of the way to see you face better and kissed your cheek. You both stayed cuddling till you fell asleep. 

“Goodnight Y/N.” 

Chan woke up to a headache and not being able to breathe through his nose, but most importantly, you weren’t next to him. He sat up slowly due to his head spinning and looked around the room. You weren’t anywhere insight which made him sad until you walked through the door, bucket of water in hand and medicine in the other. You sat down on the bed and handed him some pills and a water bottle that was sat on the ground next to his bed. 

“What’s this for?” You almost choked on your own saliva when he spoke. You haven’t heard his morning voice in a very long time and it kind of turned you on. It was groggy but very deep. His accent sounded a lot stronger when he woke up and when he was sick. 

“You’re sick dumbass. You had a fever this morning but I’m pretty sure you don’t remember me waking you up and checking your temperature.” Chan shook his head. “I’m not sick.” 

You rolled your eyes at him and scoffed. “If you could hear how congested you sound right now, you’d agree.” He shook his head and stood up. You could tell he was dizzy so you put your hands on his waist. 

“Yeah, you might be right.”  

“Uhhh duh! I told you you’d get sick if we stayed outside for too long! You didn’t even have a fucking coat.” Chan laughed loudly but it didn’t last long because he started coughing loudly. You frowned and rubbed his back. 

“This is why I feel like I need to be here 24/7.” Chan looked down at you and pouted. 

“You’ll take care of me, right?” You rolled your eyes again. 

“Of course, I have to. It’s not like you can take care of yourself.” Chan’s expression darkened and he started walking away from you. You laughed and ran up to him to stop him from walking out the door. Chan trapped you in a hug and attacked you with kisses. 

“Eww, you have germs.” Chan stopped and looked at you and smiled. “What do you care, you’ll get sick anyway.” You rolled your eyes but agreed wholeheartedly. 

“You’re right though. Maybe I should-“ 

“No, you’re not make yourself sicker just because you wanna see me. I won’t allow it, it not good for your health.”  

“Your right, I think not listening to my members would allow me to see you more than when I’m sick and my health will be fine.” 

“Oh my god, you’re so cheesy. You’re a cheesy dork who has a cold.” 

“I’m your dork baby.” 

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Roommate Problems

Admin - Ummie

Words - 3K Characters - Reader X Yuta Genre - Fluff

Sorry for any mistakes.. Enjoy!

- 

It’s one week before you finally move out of your parents house and into your new apartment with your always happy and excited best friend of 9 years. Yuta. He knows how bad you’ve been waiting to move out, saving half of every paycheck and looking up furnishing pictures every chance you had. He also knows how hard your life has been. Parents always arguing, people bullying you, being depressed and always having to clean up after your parents after every fight.

You don’t feel weird telling him about your life since you’ve known him for so long. You’re just excited to finally leave.

You get home from work, tired as always. As soon as you open the door you can hear yelling and things being tossed. You walk past it not even surprised how used to it you are.

‘Nothing new’

Your mom yells for you “Y/N.. Tell your father to stop being a dick” Your father yells back “Not until you stop being a damn bitch”

You sit in your room and text Yuta telling him your parents are at it again.

• You’ll be out of there soon! Just hang in there a little longer

You look at it and put your phone on your bed and try to fall asleep. Ignoring your parents gets a little harder but you eventually fall into a deep sleep.

The next day you go and meet with your friend Olivia at a near by cafe

“Y/N..are you sure you’ll be okay living with Yuta?” “Yeah… why?” “You know how he looks.. I know you guys are close but-”

You’ve known Olivia since you were little, you’ve been inseparable since you met

“I don’t think I’ll like him… I mean he is gorgeous and nice. And he’s funny and protective”

“and you like him?” “I don’t know.. He probably likes some other girl” The waitress comes over with your drinks

Both “Thank you”

“I don’t think he likes anyone else.. The way he is with you is like how a boyfriend is with a girlfriend.. He’s always by your side, protecting you.. shit he’s even moving in with you” “You really think he likes me?” “yeah.. I do and I think you like him but you don’t want to admit it”

-Moving Day-

You meet up with Yuta at the apartment and the moving vans parked outside. You run and give him a hug and begin putting everything inside. Feeling all of the stress leave your shoulders and like you can finally breathe.

Yuta walks into your room “Hey, I’m ordering a pizza for dinner tonight. You good with pepperoni?” “Yeah.. That’s fine with me”

Yuta throws you a wide and bright smile and walks out of the room. You finish putting things together and finish up bathroom right after.

-20 minutes later-

“PIZZAS HERE!!”

Yuta tells to you and you hurry to the kitchen.

You both sit down and you say “Thanks for the pizza. I finished up the bathroom after I finished my room. Next is the kitchen” “I’m glad we’re living together”

You both smile at each other. His smile lights up any room

“I am too!”

- A week later-

You wake up to the smell of fresh coffee. You get out of bed and follow the smell and get a cup, creamer and sugar.

“Good Morning Y/N.. How did you sleep?”

“I slept okay.. What about you?”

You look and notice that he’s shirtless which makes you freeze

“I slept alright.. I’m usually not good sleeping in a new place but I was fine last night.. I made waffles, Taeyong taught me how to make them.. I hope they taste okay”

You look at him and wonder how he looks so happy saying everything. Seeing him mad was rare, being sassy is an everyday thing and having an attitude wasn’t something that happened a lot. You’ve seen almost every side of him like he has for you. You know his secrets and what he does and doesn’t like.

“Sure.. I’ll try some”

He takes a fork and gets a piece

“Here you go”

He takes the fork and brings it to your mouth for you to eat it.. You hesitate and finally eat

“So??? How does it taste?”

He stands there and watches you waiting for a response. You look at him and smile

“Your cooking has gotten a lot better”

“REALLY?! Am I almost better than Jaehyun?!”

You laugh

“You’re getting there”

For a minute you just look at him.

“Yuta.. thanks for getting me out of that house. it means a lot to me”

“No problem.. what are best friends for? By the way, A few of my friends are going out for drinks tonight.. You should come”

“Sounds fun.. can I bring Olivia?” “Yeah”

-

You and Olivia arrive at the bar. You immediately look around for Yuta.

“Why are you looking for Yuta?” “Well I just wanted to let him know we got here safe” “Sure”

You turn around and look at her

“What are you trying to say?” “That you like him” “Why would I like him? We’re just friends” “Okay.. whatever you say”

You look around and see Yuta standing there with his friends Taeyong, Taeil and Johnny. Yuta looks over and notices you and waves his arms around like an idiot with a huge smile on his face

You grab Olivia’s arm and walk to him and his friends. Yuta meets you with a hug and kiss on the cheek and gives Olivia a hug.

'that was weird…’

Taeyong looks at you and smirks

“Y/N.. Do you want a drink?” “Sure!”

You all get a drink and Yuta stands beside you with his hand on your waist.. You look over at him and sip your drink. Olivia leans over towards you

“Yeah because friends do that a lot” “shut up!”

-10 minutes pass-

You notice Yuta move his hand as he walks to give a girl a hug. Olivia notices too and you quickly reach for another drink.

“You shouldn’t drink that much.. You already had 4 shots and a glass of wine and whiskey” “Don’t worry Olivia.. I’ll be fine”

You know you won’t be fine because for some reason you feel a little weird being around Yuta. It wasn’t like that before you moved in together. You keep drinking until Taeyong pulls the drink out of your hand.

“Why are you drinking so damn much?!” “I-I just want to” “You shouldn’t drink that much. You’ll get sick”

The girl with Yuta leaves but you take your last sip and try to put your feelings away. Yuta walks up to you and notices that you look a little upset

“Y/N.. Whats wrong?” “Huh? oh nothing..”

You look at him and see how perfect his side profile is. How his bone structure is amazing, how long his eyelashes are and how gorgeous he is. You want to be mad at him but right now it seems almost impossible

Yuta just looks at you and smiles. He leans in and kisses you hard. Your eyes close slowly as you put your arms around his neck and kiss him back.

Next thing you know you’re in your bed waking up in the same clothes from last night. You walk and peek into Yuta’s room.

“Yuta?”

You look and see him asleep with the same girl from last night.. You feel like your heart hurts and is being split in two. You shut his door and call Olivia

“Hellooooo?” “OLIVIA WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT I LIKED HIM?!” “Huh? Oh Yuta.. Yeah I told you that about 30 times”

You sit on your bed

“well he’s in bed with that girl from last night and I feel like I want to cry”

“Why did he invite her? You two hit it off last night. Making out in the middle of the bar, dancing together..”

“Can you come over?” “I’ll be there soon”

-

You quickly hop in the shower and let the water pour all over your face. Trying to wash the night off and erase it from your mind.

-20 minutes later-

Olivia comes and you bring her straight into your room.

“I didn’t know I liked him until we moved in together.. What the fuck am I supposed to do? What if he marries her? Fuck.. what if-”

“Y/N.. listen to me… They aren’t getting married. It was just a hookup.. he probably doesn’t even like her..”

You hear the front door shut and you walk out in the kitchen to get coffee for you and Olivia. Not realizing you only have pajama shorts and a tight tank top on. Yuta notices you and just walks towards you to get some coffee too

-

“Did you have fun last night?”

Yuta is surprisingly quiet

“Yeah.. you?”

You chuckle

“sure”

you get the coffee and go back into your room. You give Olivia hers and then you hear a knock on the door.

“Ugh hold on… yea?” “Y/N.. can we talk?” “About..?” “Last night”

You roll your eyes

“there’s nothing to say.. We made out and you ended up brining a girl back. I think I’m pretty caught up”

“Y/N..It wasn’t like that.. I..was just nervous”

“Because we kissed? It was pretty rude kissing someone.. THEN having them come back with a complete different person”

“I know I was rude it’s just that, I’ve liked you for a while a-” “that’s a weird way of showing that you like someone”

“I just didn’t know if I was thinking right.. Us living together made it like 100 times worse.. I just always want to kiss you but I can’t..”

-Yuta brings you to the front room and you shut your door so Olivia doesn’t hear your conversation-

“I just don’t want to ruin our friendship” “Well I realized that I liked you after moving in.. but I didn’t go fuck someone” “I know… That was just.. I wasn’t myself”

Yuta puts his hand on yours

“Y/N..I’m sorry”

Yuta gets up and goes into his room and shuts the door.

-

That next day Yuta brings that girl over again. You’re in the kitchen baking cookies as you see her walk in

“Haha wow.. cute”

You call Olivia

“Olivia… why is she here again?” “The bitch? If he said he likes you why the fuck would he bring her over??” “I’m trying to make cookies and I’m getting mad..” “Ignore him.. he’s being an asshole right now.. I have to go. I’ll call you later.. Love you” “Love you too”

You continue to bake and Yuta comes in the kitchen

“Hey”

You ignore him and put the cookies in the oven then walk into your room. He comes and knocks on the door.

“Why are you ignoring me?” “Why are you being an asshole?? you said you like me.. Then you go and bring the same girl back again”

“I… We aren’t doing anything”

“Okay.. Can you leave because I didn’t move out of a fucked up place where people argue everyday to do the same thing here”

-You go back in the kitchen a few minutes later and see Yuta have the girl leave-

“Is that better?” “excuse me?” “I had her leave… you happy now?” “haha sure..”

“She was just here to get some of her things she left here”

“okay”

You take the cookies out of the oven and put them on the counter. Yuta walks to you and turns you around and kisses you again. Harder than before. You push him away

“Kissing me isn’t going to make it better” “be quiet for a second”

He places his hands around your waist and yours are on his chest. You stop trying to fight back and kiss him.

“Y/N” “Yeah?”

“I’m sorry… I keep fucking up.. I’ve never felt like this before. I haven’t really been in a relationship. I just.. I’m used to what my parents do so it just seems natural.. But I know it’s wrong..”

“You can’t just sleep with someone after kissing a complete different person.. You honestly hurt me”

It’s true.. he did hurt you. He isn’t the kind of person to do that. He’s just a sweet person that has a smile that makes everyone around him smile as well.

“What if I promise I’ll never do that again? And I delete her number? then will you forgive me?” “Yuta…”

“No… I want to work things out.. I like you and I want to be with you. You make me a better person but I keep fucking up and I need to stop”

You smile at him quickly and kiss him once more

“Just stop being mean.. delete her number, don’t cheat and don’t do what your parents did”

“okay.. Promise” “Promise”

He seals the promise with a kiss

“so.. do you want to date me?” “yeah” “I promise I’ll be better.. I won’t fuck around” “If you do that again.. I’ll punch you”

“haha okay” “can you help me with the cookies?”

Yuta hugs you tightly and kisses you on the lips then cheek and forehead

“What kind of cookies did you make?” “red velvet and chocolate chip”

-After making the cookies-

Yuta grabs your hand

“let’s go lay down” “huh..? okay”

-

As he holds your hand and brings you into your room, you get butterflies and get nervous. You’ve never held his hand like this before, well only when he acted like he was your boyfriend but this time he really was. All you could do was look at his hand holding yours. His fingers wrapped around yours and feeling somewhat comfortable and safe.

Yuta has always been very protective over you, always made sure you ate and that you weren’t in trouble. Made sure no men messed with you. But now having him as your boyfriend instead of just your best friend made it different.

“I know this is random but I just want to lay down and cuddle with you for a while” “Oh.. t-that’s fine”

You haven’t been close with a boy before seeing as they would usually cheat or hurt you so you never had the chance to cuddle.

Yuta holds your hand and brings you to your bed

“Don’t be nervous Y/N.. I’m not going to hurt you”

He smiles and kisses you. You lay down and he wraps his arms around you as you face each other. You look at him and see each beauty mark, every pore, each acne scar. You see how pink his lips are and now nice is jawline is. You see his eyelashes twirling around the rest and his hair slightly in his eye and it scares you because you haven’t been that close to him before.

He has one hand on your waist as yours are on his chest. He kisses you again but this time you don’t feel as scared. You kiss him back and move in closer. You stop kissing and smile at him.

“Y/N.. you’re beautiful” “thank you.. You’re handsome” “Thank you”

-

You both fall asleep in your room but you wake up to the doorbell. You quietly get out of bed, kiss Yuta’s head and walk to the door. It’s the girl Yuta was with before.

“Can I help you?”

She looks confused

“Um my name is Nancy, I’m looking for Yuta..” “sorry but my boyfriend is asleep right now. I’ll let him know you came”

Yuta walks out of the room shirtless, stretching and yawning

“who’s at the door? oh, hey Nancy.. Why are you here?” “You haven’t messaged me back..”

“oh yeah well I was busy last night.. see my girlfriend and I made cookies.. I’d invite you in for some coffee but I don’t want to. Have a good day”

He walks up to the door, shuts and locks it then kisses you.

“Good Morning beautiful.. do you want some coffee?” “G-Good morning.. sure”

Yuta grabs your hand and brings you to the kitchen

“how did you meet her?” “who Nancy? we met at a party when I was like 19. She’s always been like that”

-

You go to meet Olivia at the ice cream shop

“so you two are a couple now? You should sound a little more happy”

“I am happy.. It’s just that girl Nancy. She came over this morning. What if he invites her over while I’m at work or out with you?”

“If he does that, I’ll beat the shit out of him. But I think he has more sense than that” “You’re right… I’m just overreacting”

Olivia gives you a small smile

“I wouldn’t say overreacting.. you’re just worried”

-Home-

You get back home to see Yuta in the kitchen.

“I decided to make waffles again. Maybe they’ll taste better this time. Oh I got these for you”

He walks over to you and gives you a bouquet of roses

“aww Yuta.. thank you”

You kiss him and he gives you a wide smile.

“Yuta.. can I talk to you?” “of course”

You sit down at the island in the kitchen

“I’m worried.. about Nancy” “what about her?” “That you’ll invite her over again”

He stops cooking and looks at you

“Don’t worry, you’re the only person I want to be with. Nancy was just a hookup but you.. you’re a long time relationship and love. I would never cheat on you”

“Okay.. I’m sorry for bringing it up”

“You don’t need to apologize.. I just want you to know that she’s not coming back over again. I told her today and she was pissed but she’ll obviously get over it”

“okay..” “I know you’ve been in shitty relationships but trust me.. I won’t do that to you. I need you to trust me”

It’s true that you’ve had shitty relationships before. Being cheated on and hurt and Yuta had to be the one to cheer you up and fight all of the guys. You were scared. You didn’t want to get hurt but you know Yuta isn’t like any of those guys. He’s a sweet heart..

“I trust you”

Yuta takes the last waffle out of the waffle iron, butters it, turns the waffle iron off and walks to you. He cups your face with his hands and kisses you hard. He kisses you more passionately and you can feel how much he likes you with each kiss. Each time he moves his tongue around yours.

You stop kissing and he looks at you

“You’re cute”

He kisses your nose and takes the flowers for you. He cuts the ends then puts them in a vase with water. You walk to him and hug him from behind burying your face into his shirt and smell his cologne.

“Can I have a waffle?”

He turns around and faces you. His hands on your hips and yours on his chest

“Yeah, I invited Jaehyun, Taeyong, Mark, Lucas, Renjun and Olivia over. We’re having a waffle contest”

“I already know yours are going to be the best”

“you’re on the right team”

-Yuta cups your face again and kisses you again. Making you smile with each kiss-

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

情人眼里出西施 (Part 2)

[Admin Lyric: Sorry that I took some time to upload this. I've been having really bad writers block lately.]

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3}

情人眼里出西施 - Qínɡrén yǎn lǐ chū xīshī (Love Is Blind)

Characters: Minghao, Rest of Seventeen, Kyulkyung, Donghan, Dahyun (basically some 98 liners)

Genre: College Au, Angst, Fluff I guess

Word Count: 2,300+

Warnings: Language

Hansol was confused. He looked at you, eyebrows knit together. You’ll have to tell him later about your run in with The8. You were actually sad at the fact that Junhui was friends with that dude. You were still embarrassed and wanted nothing to do with him, you didn’t even want to have see him let alone have a fucking conversation with this asshole. You took a deep breath and gave him your best fake smile.

“Hello… again…”

“Your nose isn’t bleeding this time.” He chuckled a little. Fuck him, you thought. Why does he have to bring that back up.

“Yeah, it stopped awhile ago…” You were looking down at your feet. Hansol could tell you didn’t feel comfortable with him. He grabbed your hand and stood up.

“Wanna go buy some decorations for your room?” The8’s eyes widened. You wondered why. There are a lot of Koreans who can speak English.

“You’re from the states?” Hansol took his eyes away from you and stared at him. He nodded.

“Yeah, so is y/n.”

“I should’ve known you were.” He pointed at you and smiled.

“I could tell you had an accent but I couldn’t decipher it. It’s cute.” You were shocked. You hadn’t actually thought that he would smile at you and tell you that your accent was cute. You tried to ignore the faint blush forming on your cheeks and moved your gaze back to Junhui.

“Well, We’ll be back shortly. It was nice meeting you. I hope we can become good friends.” You smiled and he smiled back at you, grin wide and almost child like. You put your hand out again awkwardly. He looked at your hand and then walked up to you and gave you a big hug.

“Don’t be awkward with me if your gonna be my friend, let alone my roommate.” You were uncomfortable. You eventually put your arms around him and hugged him back. His smile widened. You looked at The8 while Junhui bear hugged you still. He rolled his eyes.

“I’m just gonna warn you, he’s real fucking clingy. Just saying...” Junhui let go of you.

“So, you act like it’s a problem!”

“IT IS A PROBLEM!”

“Why are you so mean to me? I’m hurt” Junhui let go of you and put his hands over his face. The8 rolled his eyes again.

“I’m not mean to you, I only state the truth and if the truth hurts, it hurts I can’t change that.” You sighed. Was he really that much of an ass? You looked at Hansol and he looked at you and nodded.

“Well uh, this conversation was awkward as shit and we’ll be back.” You both started walking to the door when you felt a hand around your wrist. You turned your head to see that dudes hand on it. He grabbed your shoulders to turn you more towards him and put his hand out.

“I keep promises you know.” Your eyes widened. You had forgotten that he said he would shake your hand and tell you his name when you saw each other again. You shook his hand and he smiled.

“Xu Minghao is my name.” You smiled slightly. Minghao, that’s a nice name. He doesn’t deserve it.

“Thanks, my name is Y/F/N Y/L/N.” He smiled and ruffled your hair.

“Don’t stay out too late kids.” You and Hansol laughed.

“Alright mom…”

-

You and Hansol walked together to the craft store arm in arm. Some girls on campus gave you weird looks. You were aware of the fact that Hansol was popular where ever he was because he had the aura about him that made anyone want to approach him and he was cute. You didn’t really care though considering the fact that he was just your best friend. Just because you two were walking with your arms linked together, doesn’t mean that you were dating him but you guessed that’s not what others thought.

“So like how do you know him?” Hansol glanced at you and wiggled his eyebrows. You hit his arm slightly and sighed.

“Well, Seungkwan had been so obsessed about finding you that he walked way too fucking fast and I tripped and fell. My nose started bleeding and Minghao was nice enough to give me some tissues.” Hansol laughed. You frowned.

“I told Seungkwan that he was walking too fast and he didn’t even listen!” You pouted. Hansol stopped walking and so did you. He gave you a hug.

“My poor baby. I’m sorry!” He chuckled. You swatted at him to move. He laughed louder. You grabbed his arm and looped it with yours again.

“Its not funny…”

The both of ended up buying way too much stuff from the craft store but went back to your dorm anyway. You knocked on the door because you forgot your keys and to your luck, Junhui was still there and had opened the door for you two.

“Ooo! What did you guys get?” He was almost jumping up and down. You didn’t even buy him anything.

“Just some things to make my room look some what decent.” Junhui stopped jumping and frowned.

“I can’t see what you got?” He pouted and you smiled. Minghao rolled his eyes.

“No you can’t because it’s a surprise~” You sang and he pouted again.

“Please!” You put your finger up and shook it. Minghao sighed loudley. You looked at him curiously. He was sat on the floor, legs crossed with a beer in one hand and his phone in the other. You put your bag of random shit down on the ground, which Junhui gladly rummaged through, and sat near him. He looked up at you from his phone and stared at you.

“What?” You shook your head.

“Nothing, just wanted to see what you were doing.” He eyed you curiously and looked at his phone again.

“Won’t your boyfriend be mad with you being this close to me?” Your eyes widened then you tilted your head towards him more.

“What boyfriend?” He looked up from him phone and pointed at Hansol who was talking to Junhui. You laughed.

“He’s not my boyfriend. I’ve known Hansol since I was 13 but we’re not dating.” He smiled then laughed. You laughed again with him.

“Sorry, you guys look good together though.” You scrunched your nose up at the thought of dating Hansol. He’s like a brother to you, no romantic feelings have ever shown themselves since you’ve met him. Minghao looked at you and giggled. His giggle was cute and you smiled. He leaned close to your face and whispered.

“Well now I can have you to myself.” You shivered from the feeling of his breath on your skin. You could smell the beer on him from him being so close to you. He smirked and backed up, he went back to being on his phone. What the fuck? Did you ever tell him you were his? No, so why did he think that? You blinked a few times staring off into space. Minghao looked at you again and smiled.

“Babe, I’m just joking.” You whipped your head towards him and bumped your forehead with his. It hurt. You rubbed you head and so did Minghao.

“Why the hell did you turn your head like that?” He glared at you. He tried to look mad but he looked more amused then mad.

“I don’t know, uhh…YOU CALLED ME BABE!? And why were you so fucking close to me? If you weren’t maybe I wouldn’t have bumped my head against yours.” Minghao smirked. You rolled your eyes at him.

“What’s wrong with calling you babe?” You looked back at him and smacked the back of his head, beer almost spilling on the floor. He yelped.

“It’s literally only been like 3 hours since I’ve met you!”

“Actually it’s been like 4 hours.”

“Wow, that makes a big difference Hao.” Minghao looked at you doe eyed. You rolled your eyes at him again.

“Did you just give me a nickname?” You sighed. Is this what’s it gonna be like around him?

“Technically, it’s just a shortened version of your name not so much a nickname. Like Jun is short for Junhui.” Minghao looked at you bitterly and shook his head.

“Its still a nickname like when I called you babe.” He smirked at you. You almost slapped it off of his face. You weren’t comfortable around people you barely knew and for him to call you babe was uncomfortable. Just the fact that you’re even talking to him right now after the embarrassing moment is punishment in it self. Hansol called your name. You took your attention away from the annoying thing next to you and got up from the ground. Minghao smiled and pulled you back down to the ground only for you to land right in his lap.

You looked at him angrily, face red from blushing at the fact that you were sitting on him.

“I like the view.” You frowned. Then pushed his face towards a complete opposite direction so you couldn’t see his face. You were blushing so hard you thought you probably looked like a tomato. You pushed yourself off of his lap and practically ran to Hansol and hid in his chest. Minghao on the other hand found you adorable and rather funny. Hansol just looked at you like a dumb ass and put his arms around you. Your muscles relaxed at his touch and you were no longer tense. You sighed quietly and turned your head out of his chest to get some air because boy smelled like straight cologne. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Minghao get up and throw out his now empty beer bottle and sit back on the floor.

You sighed and let go of Hansol.

“Are you okay?” You nodded and ran your fingers through your hair.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“No she’s not!” You looked in Minghao’s direction and glared at him. He giggled and resumed being on his phone.

“Did I miss something?” You turned your attention away from the douche and turned it back towards Hansol.

“Don’t listen to him, he’s just…well…annoying.” You could feel Minghao’s eye roll without having to see it. You sighed and walked over to Junhui and practically pried the bag of stuff out his hands. He pouted and you chuckled then gave him some washy tape that had cool patterns on it. He grinned widely and trapped you in a bear hug, oxygen leaving you lungs momentarily.

“Thank you! I don’t know what I’ll put it on but I’ll definitely use it for…something.” You laughed and smiled at him.

“You’re welcome Junhui, its not much though.” He smiled widely and practically ran to his room. You chuckled and went to your room as well to go paint and add shit around your room.

You lied a few pieces of newspaper on the floor in front of you and started to paint some medium sized letters that spelled out your name. It was kinda cheesy but it made your tan colored desk stand out and not look so plain. You saw something move through your peripheral vision and it sat down on the floor in front of you. The figure picked up a letter and started to paint it with another brush. You didn’t really say anything because you thought that it was probably Hansol, but it wasn’t.

“Why red?” You jumped at the sound of Minghao’s voice. He giggled then continued painting. You rolled your eyes.

“Because I like red?” Minghao looked up at you through squinted eyes.

“I thought you’d like a more… girly color. Should’ve known by the way you were dressed.” You scoffed then stood up and pointed towards the door.

“Get out.” Minghao raised his left eyebrow.

“Why?” You didn’t want him around you. He was an annoying asshole who you wanted to beat the shit out of and you wanted absolutely nothing to do with him. Painting was therapeutic to you and he was ruining it. You sighed. 

“You just insulted my fashion in front of my face and-“

“Hello? Is anyone here? Wait! CHAEYOUNG DON’T LEAVE ME!” You walked past Minghao, brush still moving, and went toward the living area. It was a girl, about the same height as you but a bit shorter. The other girl was shorter then the other with bags in her hands.

“I’m uh… Dahyun. I’m your roommate right? I didn’t get the wrong room?” You shook your head. Dahyun was a girl! You thanked god that you weren’t rooming with 3 guys. You wondered if Donghan and Jieqiong were there too. You missed them.

“Junhui! Come meet Dahyun!” He ran out of his room and slipped a little bit because of his socks. You tried not to laugh but failed. He pouted at you and you instantly uwued.

He bowed to her and introduced himself to her. They ended up in a conversation which reminded you. Where was Hansol? You looked around a bit and found him asleep on Seungkwan’s unmade bed. You cooed and ruffled his hair a little then walked back out carefully and shut the door. You sent Seungkwan a quick text to not get surprised if Hansol was sleeping in his bed. You thought you should go have a conversation with Dahyun because you didnt know and but you were too shy to do that. You shook your head. The sooner the better.

You felt a tap on your shoulder and you turned around to reveal a paint covered Minghao holding the fully painted letters of your name. You eyed him curiously. He must of knew you were suspicious of him because he rolled his eyes.

“I’m not always mean, I just like teasing you.”  

“I don’t believe you.” 

“I really do like your fashion sense though. It’s unique, it’s you. And I guess I could say you’re somewhat pretty?” Minghao instantly laughed when he saw your facial expression. You raised your hand at him and he flinched a little.   

“Hey, I didn’t have to do this.” 

“Why did you anyway? Are you actually nice?” You faked a gasp and Minghao frowned. 

“No, I felt bad cause I saw you painting earlier and it was very amateur, I thought I’d look better if some one who knows art did it.” You rolled your eyes but smiled. Maybe you could get used to him.

“Thank you Hao.”

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

花吐き病 (Part 2)

[Admin Lyric: Please don’t read this if you are sensitive to verbally “abusive” words and death. If you do read it then I hope you like it!! Cue the water works. P.S, I am not try trying to make Minghao and Seokmin look like bad people, Its just a part of the story.]

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3}

Characters: Soonyoung (Hoshi), Mingyu, Rest of Seventeen

Genre: Hanahaki Disease Au, Angst

Word Count: 2,300+

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol usage, Mentions of depression, Mentions of contemplating suicide, Major character death

“Hyung, is he gonna be alright?” Chan looked at Joshua with an expression he’s never seen him have.

“Honestly, I’m not sure.” Tears threatened to fall from Chan’s eyes. Joshua put his arms around him and squeezed his body slightly.

“Don’t worry to much okay? We’ll get him the help he needs.” Chan nodded lightly and wiped at the tears that had slipped passed his eyes. You frowned. Why was Soonyoung being so…irresponsible? You’ve never seen him so weak ever since some time during Seventeen’s Diamond Edge tour last year. He always talked about wanting to be healthy and not wanting to let the fans down because he wanted to be as healthy as he could. The situation must be a lot worse then everyone images.

Seungcheol walked to you and sat on your left.  

“Are you okay? Well actually, that’s a dumb ass question. Are you gonna be somewhat okay? You look distracted.” You turned you head in his direction and smiled weakly.

“I’ll be okay once Soonyoung’s okay. I hope that comes sooner then I’m thinking.” Seungcheol ruffled your hair lightly and smiled.

“He has us, why wouldn’t he be okay?” You gave him a that’s-so-cheesy look and he laughed.

“You know, I wonder who he’s in love with.” You looked for the owner of that voice and of course it was Seokmin who was smirking. Seungkwan and Hansol agreed wholeheartedly. Minghao didn’t seem to be having it. His right leg was shaking violently as he stared at Seokmin in disbelief.

“Are you really worried about that right now? Why not try and talk to him to see if he’s mentally okay? But no, wonder who the fuck he’s in love with right? He probably doesn’t even wanna talk about it.” Seokmin rolled his eyes.

“Oh my god Minghao, I can’t wonder. And it’s not like I can go and ask him anyway, his doors fucking locked and his phones off.” This time it was Minghao’s turn to roll his eyes.

“Bitch, that’s not what I meant.”  

“Language please!”

“Well then what did you mean? Obviously I missed the not explained correctly explanation you just gave.”

“Maybe if you paid attention Seokmin, you’d know I meant when he finally opened the fucking door. But you don’t care about his well being though because you’re not a very good friend.” Seokmin laughed and shook his head. You were actually quite scared. You’ve never seen either of them so seriously angry with one another. You thought you should butt in at some point but would that really help?

“Don’t talk about me being a bad friend when I’m not the one who’s always pissy with everyone. I don’t tell people to go die as a joke, it’s not funny.”

“Wow! You act like I say that to everyone! I only say that to Junhui when he pisses me off and he knows I’m joking. Plus I don’t know if you should be talking. You’re real annoying bro.” You stood up off the couch, deciding after awhile that you should butt in.

“Hey guys maybe you should-“

“THIS DOESN’T INVOLVE YOU!” Well, damn. They said that in unison. You sighed and sat back down on the sofa. You guessed that it wasn’t really worth it.

“So saying go die is funny!?” Minghao chuckled and looked at his phone then back at Seokmin.

“Bro, stop being so fucking sensitive. I’m not even saying it to you!”

“How am I being sensitive? I’m just stating facts.”

“You wanna be edgy bitch?”

“Guys stop. This is getting out of hand, okay!? Let’s all calm down and relax, yeah?” Joshua looked at both of them. Seokmin and Minghao both nodded. Minghao put in his ear buds and leaned his head on Junhui’s shoulder and closed his eyes. Seokmin sat on the floor and grabbed his phone.

You were glad that Joshua had spoken up and told them to stop. You didn’t want anyone to fight because Soonyoung needs all of them. He needs everyone. He shouldn’t be going through this on his own, that’s a stupid idea. It’s not good especially with his disease.

“You think he’s in love with Jihoon?” Seungkwan held his breath after he said that. Seokmin started snickering and Jihoon glared at Seungkwan.

“You fucking bitch, that’s nasty, I don’t want anything to do with his love.”

“So you hate gays?” Jihoon rolled his eyes at Seokmin. He really wanted to stab him and Seungkwan.

“Don’t shove words down my throat. I just don’t love him like that, let alone like him in that way.” Jihoon crossed his arms and looked away. Seokmin smiled and hugged Jihoon’s leg. Jihoon tried to shake him off but failed.

“I know we’re just kidding hyung!” Jeonghan stood up suddenly and everyone got quiet.

“Does anyone wanna volunteer to go see if Soonyoung is okay?”  

“I’m fine hyung.” You whipped your head around to the sound of Soonyoung’s voice. It’s was dry and scratchy, airy and small. It broke your heart. You got up and gave him a hug. Soonyoung was caught off guard but hugged you back anyway. You turned your head to the rest of the members. They just sat there. Quiet and unmoved. You were kind of angry at them. Not so much Minghao because he couldn’t hear and you were pretty sure he was sleep, but everyone else had no excuses. They didn’t even ask him if he was okay. They didn’t even look at him. They weren’t even happy that Soonyoung was out of his room. You shook your head and sighed.

“I can’t believe you guys right now. Just because Soonyoung has a stupid fucking disease and didn’t tell you about it, doesn’t mean you guys shouldn’t see if he’s okay. He needs us to help him and you’re all just sitting there!” Soonyoung put a hand on you shoulder. You turned your head slightly, enough for you to see him properly. He smiled a bit, but you could tell it was forced.  

“Sorry about my sudden outburst earlier. Sorry for not telling you about my disease. I should’ve but…” Soonyoung felt like he disappointed everyone. He didn’t know what he should do. He felt like he was in shambles. Big pieces of glass stuck in his chest, making his breathing more difficult. He wanted to leave.

“I can’t forgive myself for what I did to myself. I should’ve told you guys. Now, this’ll be my punishment.” Jeonghan looked over at Soonyoung with wide eyes.

“What do you mean by punishment?” Soonyoung looked away from Jeonghan’s eyes. He felt guilty that he made his members worried. He just wanted himself to feel sad. That’s the least he could do.

“Just let me be sad. Stay disappointed in me. Don’t try and cheer me up because I won’t let you. I don’t want you to.” You grabbed Soonyoung’s hand. He turned his head towards you. His eyes looked lifeless. No emotion whatsoever. You wanted to hug him and tell him it was okay, but he just let go of your hand and walked out the front door. Mingyu was the first one to stand up and try to go after Soonyoung but you stopped him. 

“Let him relax. He’s at a vulnerable state right now. We’ll all go look for him in a bit.” Mingyu nodded. He was just worried, you could tell but that’s not what Soonyoung needed right now. He hugged you and kissed the top of your head. You hugged him back and tried your best to act like you were fine but you weren’t.

-

Soonyoung sat at a bench somewhere on some street he didn’t know. He just let his legs take him wherever. He sighed and chugged the rest of the beer he had in his hand. He threw it on the concrete. Glass shards in the middle of the sidewalk. Why was he so sad and angry at himself for keeping a secret from his friends? They don’t know who he’s in love with and if they found out, they’d know why he kept it to himself. 

“You know, if someone walked right there they’d get glass in there feet?” Soonyoung turned his head slowly due to being tipsy. It was Jeonghan. Why was he here? 

“Hyung, go away. I said I didn’t want-“ 

“That’s not what I came here for.” 

Jeonghan sat on Soonyoung’s left and put his head on his shoulder. He sighed.  “Look. I’ve known you for 5 years now and I’ve seen you grow and you’ve gotten so mature. You know right from Left, past from present, using logic over opinion.” Soonyoung turned his head a little. 

“Where are you going with this?” Jeonghan lifted his head off of Soonyoung’s shoulder. He looked up at the sky. The sun was setting. 

“I know that you’re gonna get through your hanahaki disease if you make the right choice. I know that you’re gonna make the right choice Soonyoung.” Soonyoung started to sob. Jeonghan just stared at him. He didn’t hug him because he knew what Soonyoung wanted. All he need was the truth because the truth hurts, but it’s better then sugar coating things he knew would never happen. Reality is real. Words are just words. No one can make as an important decision in one’s life then yourself. 

“I hate that you have to bring this up now! Why couldn’t you just stay at the dorm like everyone else?! Maybe if I kill myself now then I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of dying slowly! I wouldn’t have to hide from Y/N anymore! I’d just be fucking dead!” He was still crying really hard. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. 

“The members are all looking for you right now. They’ve been looking for you since 6. It’s been 2 hours.” Soonyoung turned his head towards Jeonghan and glared at him. 

“Just because they’re out looking for me doesn’t mean they love me!” Jeonghan rolled his eyes and stood up. 

“Kwon Soonyoung. Listen to yourself right now! Your members love you! The pain that you’re going through right now, we share. We’re like family. Why don’t you stop being selfish and thinking that your members hate you or have some resentment towards you. Especially Y/N. Do you like to make her feel sad? Do you really wanna kill yourself and have all of us sad and heartbroken because of your own dumb ass way of thinking?” Soonyoung’s eyes softened. His hyung was crying and it was because of him.  

“I’m sorry. I-“ Jeonghan ran up to him and gave him a hug and bawled into his chest.  

“Hug me stupid!” He chocked out through his tears. Soonyoung hugged him back, soothing him by rubbing his back and telling him he’s sorry that he made him cry. 

“Like I said, we’re family. We share the same pain. I would never let you go through this alone. We’ll win together.”

-

“Maybe we should split up and go in-“ 

“Oh shut up I’m right here.” Seungkwan turned his head in the direction of the front door. He ran up to Soonyoung and almost knocked him over. 

“HYUNG!!! WHY DID YOU LEAVE AND NOT TELL ANYONE!!”  Soonyoung knew he wasn’t that mad at him because of the gentle smile on his lips. “I don’t know. I was just being stupid.” Seungkwan laughed and nodded then looked at Jihoon.  

“Jihoon hyung was crying because he didn’t know where you were.” Jihoon punched Seungkwan in his back. Seungkwan yelped and pouted. 

“Shut up. I wasn’t crying, I have allergies…” Soonyoung laughed and gave Jihoon a hug. Jihoon just stood there. He looked uncomfortable but he hugged him back. “Don’t ever do shit like that ever again.” Jihoon warned. Soonyoung nodded. He turned towards you and grabbed your wrist. 

“Can I talk to you for a sec?” You looked at Mingyu. He was talking to Jeonghan about where he found Soonyoung. You nodded still looking at Mingyu. You two walked in his room. He shut the door and sat on the floor. He patted the floor next to him and walked over to him and sat down. He seemed uneasy. 

“Uhh, say if I told you that the person I loved was in a relationship. Wouldn’t me telling them ruin their relationship?” You knit your eyebrows together. You tried to think who it was but a lot of his friends were in relationships. 

“Well I think that if you wanna become better, you’d have to tell them. Even if they don’t except your love at least they know and you’ll be able to live longer.” Soonyoung shook his head. 

“What if I told you they were both my best friends.” Your eyes widened. Really? That’s a bit hard to give advise to. You took his hands into yours and rubbed your thumbs on the back of hands. He seemed to relax a little. 

“I’m pretty sure they’ll both understand the position you’re in. And like I said, at least you’ll tell them so they’ll know. Both of them will.” His head lowered. You felt something drip onto your hand. His body started to shake lightly. 

“Why do I keep crying? Why am I so weak?” You grabbed him and hugged him tightly. You felt so bad that he was going through these things. Maybe if he told them soon he’d feel better? Maybe if he told his members this could’ve been prevented? You sighed. 

“I’m sorry you have to see me like this.” You lifted his head up and wiped his tears away they kept coming but you didn’t care and continued wiping his face.

“Soonyoung. You aren’t weak. Everyone cries. It’s to feel better when you sad, angry, or confused. I just want you to be okay. I’ve been so worried about you I haven’t been able to do anything right. I love you so much.” Soonyoungs eyes widened. You gave him another hug.  Soonyoung felt his heart beating so fast he thought I’d burst. But why did his lungs still feel stuffy and why did his heart sting. He knew why. You said you loved him but it wasn’t the love he wanted, the love he needed. You were oblivious to the fact that you’d just broken his heart more, he tried not to show it. You kissed his forehead and hugged him again. Soonyoung couldn’t breathe anymore. He didn’t know how to. You’d given him what he thought he wanted, but deep down inside, he knew that those things he needed were meant for Mingyu. 

Everything went black.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

花吐き病 (Part 1)

[Admin Lyric: Please don’t read this if you are sensitive to verbally “abusive” words and death. If you do read it then I hope you enjoy it!! Cue the water works...]

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3}

Characters: Soonyoung (Hoshi), Mingyu, Rest of Seventeen

Genre: Hanahaki Disease Au, Angst

Word Count: 3,500+

Warnings: Language, Mentions of alcohol use, Mentions of depression, Mentions of contemplating suicide, Major character death

Love is something no one understands. It makes you happy, sad, mad, confused, and exedra. Sometimes, it’s like getting whiplash from getting into a car accident, comes too fast and is exceedingly painful. People who are in love with each other are always happy and normally have a nice healthy relationship together, have kids, get married in the future. That was not the case for Soonyoung.

He has always been and always will be a relatively energetic person. He’s very outgoing and people tend to get along with him easily. But what they don’t know about is his long lasting depression. His depression was caused by only one thing. You.

He hasn’t told anyone about it, hasn’t talked to someone for advice, hasn’t tried to reach out for a doctor. He thinks that if he tries hard enough, his feelings for you won’t last. As for the occasional dizzy sickening feeling he gets when waking up, the rough feeling in his throat, and puking up red rose petals, will go away once his feelings go away. But in reality he knows that it’s only gonna get worse.

You’d been in a relationship with one of Soonyoung’s band mates, Kim Mingyu. You’ve been together for a half of a year (6 months) so far and you looked happy to be by his side. What you didn’t realize was that it only made things worse for Soonyoung. When you’d have really good days with Mingyu, like cuddling, kissing, hugging, that would only make Soonyoung’s day shit. When he’d see you happy he was happy, but that only means that he’d have to suffer throwing up more petals throughout the day.

He was close with Mingyu like how he was with Jihoon, which was not good at all on his part. That’s his best friend and he would never want to interfere with yours and his relationship so he never told anyone about his disease. He was always nervous being in the small cramped dorm because he could get found out and have to tell everyone that he was in love with you and Mingyu would hate him forever. That would be the last thing he’d want to happen between him and Mingyu.

Soonyoung really had one question, can someone fall out of love? Will he die if he keeps coughing up flowers? If he tells you and Mingyu about his feelings will they be able to stay friends? Will you be disgusted by him for telling you his feelings while you were in a relationship with his best friend? Well he actually had four questions…

Soonyoung had woken up to the nauseating feeling eating away at his stomach. He’s used to it by now, but as soon as he sits up, he falls back down on his bed. He’s been dizzy almost every morning but it has never been this bad. He couldn’t even stand let alone sit up right. He had to get up. He could feel the rough poking feeling in his throat and knew he had to get the flower petals out of his lungs.

The petals in his lungs were almost suffocating him as he laid on his back facing the ceiling. He stood up off of his bed and fell on the floor, coughing and gagging, gasping for air. Blood. All he saw was blood on his hands and lots of rose petals but he didn’t have time to analyze the things around him. He grabbed at his throat from choking so much, his nails digging in his neck as he desperately gasped for more air. He put his hand into his mouth and pulled out of his throat a long steamed rose with lots of thorns and huge petals.

His breathing still wasn’t stable, which led it to get more unstable due to the mini panic attack he was having. Soonyoung was used to flower petals coming out of his mouth, but it was never a whole entire rose. He had to clam himself down before someone heard him. He started coughing again and more rose petals flew from his mouth.

He heard sniffing noises coming from his right. He was scared. He didn’t want to face having to tell anyone, not yet, it was too soon.

“How long?” Soonyoung sighed lightly. It was at least Jeonghan. How much did he see? He felt embarrassed.

“What do you mean hyung?” Soonyoung didn’t need to look at Jeonghan in the eye to know he was getting aggravated.

Jeonghan’s patience was slim to none, thinner then ice. He knew he needed to be there for Soonyoung, but he just couldn’t believe that he didn’t tell anyone about the situation he’s in.

“Soonyoung-ah, please be honest with me. I just want to know why you kept this from us.”

“I’m sorry…”

“How long has it been since you noticed?” Soonyoung could tell Jeonghan was getting angrier. He had to say something but he was scared.

“…about 2 months ago…” He gulped. He stared at his bloody hands and shook his head repeatedly.

“It only started out as flower seeds and leaves, I didn’t think much of it at first until I went to the doctors appointment I had a month ago. It only g-got worse because…” He started to trail off, getting to a place in his small speech where he was uncomfortable with and he’d rather much avoid the topic of bringing you up. Jeonghan sighed.

“Well if it started to get worse then why-“ Soonyoung cut him off.

“Hyung, you wouldn’t understand!” His voice cracked. It had gotten horse from all of the coughing. He didn’t mean to yell at Jeonghan for his own selfishness. He was just frustrated by the situation at hand and wanted to let whatever was going to happen to him happen.

“This is about Y/N isn’t it? You love her don’t you?” Soonyoung’s head snapped up. He looked at Jeonghan, nervousness evident in his eyes. He gulped again.

“H-How did you know that I…” His voice was quiet, yet Jeonghan could tell he was going to break down soon. He wasn’t trying to force Soonyoung to tell him exactly what was wrong with him, he already knew, he just had to be sure. He observes every one in the dorm to make sure they’re okay even if they don’t want to talk about their problems, he still asks them about it because he knows that deep down inside they need to talk to someone. As for right now Soonyoung wasn’t okay. He wanted to at least help him with whatever he could even if it meant it was near to impossible.

“Soonyoung if it’s this bad, maybe you should consider getting the surgery.”

“No.” He shook his head vigorously. The surgery for Hanahaki disease is extremely risky. If you get it, there is a very high chance that you may not be able to love anyone ever again. There’s also a high chance that you can even lose other emotions when the surgery is done. Soonyoung did want to rid himself of his feelings for you so he didn’t have to lie anymore, but he doesn’t want to become someone who is emotionless. He doesn’t want to become a robot or a waste of space on earth.

“I’m not going to do anything t-that involves getting myself even more screwed up okay!!” Soonyoung was thankful that the rest of the members weren’t there because if they were, Mingyu would have heard everything and he would have to lock himself in his room. He squeezed his eyes shut. Tears streamed down his cheeks.

Jeonghan sat next to Soonyoung on the floor and hugged him, tears began to slip past his eyes again.

“Please do something to help yourself and if there’s anything I can do, please let me know.” Jeonghan looked at him. Soonyoung’s skin was flushed, he had eye bags due to lack of sleep, and he looked like he lost some weight. He frowned a bit. They stayed hugging for a while until they both stopped crying.

“Do me this favor, please keep this a secret from everyone. I just need time, I promise that I’ll tell them. Just not right now.”

-1 Hour Later-

“We’re back~~” Mingyu stopped in his tracks and glanced around the living area. No one was there. He shrugged and put the grocery bags on their kitchen table.

“Where’s Jeonghan and Soonyoung?” Mingyu turned towards you and shrugged and started to unpack the items they bought along with Chan. “I’m pretty sure they’re fine.” You nodded. Everyone else seemed unfazed by the situation while you were a bit worried. Even with one or two people here, they would still be loud and obnoxious, so you decided to check on them yourself.

You had opened the door to one of the bedrooms and found them asleep. You cooed at how cute they were and closed the door softly, but you were indeed wrong because Soonyoung was still awake, unable to sleep because he heard your voice. He could see the smile that was on your face when you’d laugh at something Mingyu did or said. He loved it, he loved everything about the thoughts he has every time you’re with them at their dorm. Yet it only made his throat tingle and the hard scratchy rough sensation was back. He frowned. He also hated the thoughts that he had because he knew that he wasn’t the one that made you smile and laugh. You don’t return the love he has for you because he wasn’t the person beside you. That was Mingyu. Next thing he knew, he had three roses coming out of his throat. It was hard to breathe again.

-

It’s been 3 days since Jeonghan found out about Soonyoung’s disease. He hasn’t told anyone about it and for that, Soonyoung is very thankful. It’s been three days since you’ve came back to Seventeen’s dorm and three days of hell on Soonyoung’s part. He tried to make as many excuses as he could to not conversant with you and so far they did work. He was trying not to sound like it was lies he was telling you, eating away at your brain making you believe he was telling the truth, that he didn’t feel well and that he was tired and wanted sleep, but that’s exactly what happened.

You had tried to converse into any conversation Soonyoung was in just to see if he was feeling better, but he just kept avoiding you. It hurt. You wanted to know why he was avoiding you but you didn’t want to force him to do anything that was uncomfortable for him, so you just let it slide.

“Soonyoung! Did you want anything from the Japanese place?” Soonyoung looked at you and smiled.

“Hehehe! Y/N, I’m going there right now.” You could tell your face heated up from embarrassment.

“Ohh, wow I’m stupid.” You put your hands on either side of your cheek. Soonyoung laughed. His eye smile always made you feel a little better.

“Ayyyyyeee. You’re not stupid. Don’t beat yourself up about it, you didn’t even know it was going.” He rolled his eyes at you and you playfully hit him on his arm. He laughed again.

Something about Soonyoung always made you feel like you were at home. Mingyu made you feel like you were at home, but with Soonyoung it was different. He always tried to seem chic and haughty or tough and rugged, but he was the complete opposite, a giant baby that walked on two legs and a big giant plushie of a hamster. He was just Soonyoung. At first when you started to have all these thoughts about him you started to panic, thinking Mingyu would hate you if he found out you had a crush on him and yeah, you did have some type of feelings for him, but you weren’t sure what they were. Crush? Like? Love?

As many times as you tried to brush it off, it came back to you. Soonyoung is such a sweetheart and so nice to you that maybe you think that you have a crush on him even though you really don’t. You haven’t told anyone about how you’ve been feeling about Soonyoung since it was hard for you determine for yourself. A crush is a crush, but what does it mean when the feelings continue through months of uncertainty?

“Well I guess you’re right Hosh…” You crossed your arms over your chest. Soonyoung coughed.

“Are you getting sick? You don’t look too good.” Concern was written all over your face.

“Yeah. I haven’t been feeling so great lately. I’ll be fine don’t worry about me.” Soonyoung coughed again, and again, and again. He smiled. You gave him a weak smile.

“You ready Y/N?”

“Huh? Oh yeah, let’s go”

As you walked outside and down the street, you looked at Soonyoung, then looked down at his hand. You mentally slapped yourself in the face. Why were you thinking about holding his hand? Why is it much of a problem? Why do you think it’s not a problem when it is? KIM MINGYU IS YOUR-

“Where the hell are you going?” You looked to your left. Soonyoung wasn’t next to you anymore, he was behind you. You turned around and was met with a beautiful pair of chocolate brown eyes. You gulped then backed up quickly.

“I’m s-sorry! I uhh.” Soonyoung chuckled then started walking into the restaurant. Your face felt hot. You were blushing. Why were you blushing? KIM MINGYU IS YOUR-

“Y/N!! Are you coming in or??”

“Yeah! Sorry Soonyoung…” Soonyoung rolled his eyes.

“Why do you keep apologizing to me? Your fine, you didn’t do anything.” He laughed which caused your face to fell hotter. God you had get away from him as soon as possible.

“Sorry… I MEAN-…” You sighed. He laughed at you again. You punched his arm and he winced slightly. Then it was you turn to laugh at him. He pouted.

“That hurt!” He pretended to cry. You rolled your eyes.

“No it didn’t.”

“Yes it did!”

“No it didn’t.”

“Yes it did!”

“No it didn’t.”

“How can you tell if it didn’t hurt if you’re not me?” He crossed his arms still pouting. You giggled at his cuteness.

“Did it really hurt Soonyoung?” He looked at you and sighed.

“No…”

“Exactly, now can we get the food?” He pouted again, then nodded.

You and Soonyoung walked back to Seventeen’s dorm in silence. Mainly because if Soonyoung talked, he’d end up coughing up roses, and you trying to sort out your feelings, which was overwhelming. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence though, it was… warm… almost too warm. Wait. You looked down and your eyes widened. Had you intended to hold his hand? Was he the one to hold yours? You stared at your hands intertwined in each others. It looked so… perfect. You shook your head. No. You have a boyfriend. You’ve told yourself this so many times to the point where it was a mantra in your head. You looked up to see Soonyoung staring at you. You blushed and looked away.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to keep our hands like this. I wanted to make sure you didn’t cross the street without being protected a little.” He was about to let go of your hand but you stopped him. You didn’t know why but you did.

“Nah, I-it’s fine. You act like friends don’t hold hands.” You smiled at him and he smiled back, eyes turning into crescents. You left your hand in his for the rest of the walk back to the dorm.

You had knocked on the door so many times and no one has come to answer it. You were frustrated. You called Mingyu and he didn’t even answer, Soonyoung called everyone and they didn’t answer. You were pissed. Soonyoung was panicking. You had held his hand all the way back to the dorm and no one was answering the door. He had to get these flowers out of his lungs or he’d end up doing it in front of you and he didn’t want that.

“Isn’t there a spare key?” Soonyoung looked at you and smiled. Then he walked over to a bush and grabbed a key. You were so excited you started jumping up and down. When the both of you had gotten inside, you saw that everyone was sleep in their rooms. Why are they sleeping, it hasn’t even been that long since we left, you thought. You walked into Soonyoung and Jihoon’s shared room and grabbed the bullhorn that Jihoon had (and used to yell at his members) and turned the siren on. Jihoon sat up so quick he almost broke his neck. He glared at you then laid back down and put a pillow over his face.

“TURN THAT SHIT OFF!” You laughed. You then noticed others had woken up and decided to have a little fun of your own. You turned the siren off and spoke through it instead.

“EVERYONE, WE GOT FOOD SO GET YOUR ASS UP AND EAT!” You felt arms wrap around your waist and you turned you head a little. It was a cute shirtless half asleep baby, your baby. You then turned around and cupped his face with your small hands.

“Babe, we got food. Wake up so you don’t choke on it.” You smiled when you saw his eyes open.

“Okay… I’m tired though.”

“Choke on your food then. Wait I wanna see that.” You saw Jihoon standing near the doorway looking happy at the thought of Mingyu choking. You sighed.

“Jihoon, Don’t do it to yourself~~” He just rolled his eyes at you and walked into the kitchen. Mingyu kissed your forehead and you blushed and gave him a quick peck on his lips. He pouted and kissed your forehead again, then your nose, then finally your lips. It wasn’t a long kiss, but it wasn’t short either. He pulled away and smiled at you. You blushed again. You wonder how he still made you feel like this even when you’ve been dating for a half a year and have know him for 2.

You forgot that you came back from getting the food with Soonyoung so you looked to see if he was anywhere in sight. You thought you heard coughing coming from the bathroom and walked over towards the door. Putting your ear up to it carefully, you could definitely tell that it was coughing you heard. It was Soonyoung for sure. You knocked on it softly. Soonyoung cracked the door open and looked at you through his swollen eyes.

“Hmm?”

“Are you okay? Did you throw up?” He simply looked at you and frowned. He nodded.

“Yeah, but I’ll be okay. I’m just gonna lay down for a bit.” He had eventually opened the bathroom door all the way and walked out.

“Are you gonna eat anything?”

“Nah, I don’t feel well enough to eat. Could you put it in the fridge for me?” You gave him a weak smile and nodded. He eventually walked away and shut his bedroom door. Your feet were glued to the floor unable to move. You couldn’t just sit here and let him be sick. You were worried and wanted to take care of him. It really wasn’t a good idea to not eat when your sick, you could make him some Ramen if he couldn’t eat anything really heavy. You sighed, walked over to the bedroom door and knocked.

“Hey, Soon? I’m coming in okay?”

“WAIT!!…I mean uhh…h-hold on for a sec.” You knit your eyebrows together. He didn’t throw up on himself did he? Was he really okay as much as he’s told you. You didn’t want to wait anymore, not caring if he was naked or not, you walked in.

You stood there, your mouth agape. Soonyoung was sitting on the floor, blood, flower petals and whole roses on the ground. He was trying to push them under his bed. He looked up at you with wide eyes. Is this what he meant by sick?

“Y/N, I c-can explain! Just come in slow-“

“No Soonyoung, I’m not gonna let you sit here and ruin your health. YOU HAVE A DISEASE!” Soonyoung started crying.

“Y/N please I-“

The rest of the members piled around you after hearing you yell, their faces just as shocked as yours. Seungcheol took a deep breath and spoke. His voice came out very monotone.

“Soonyoung. When- no, why didn’t you tell us?” You could tell he was sad and confused but trying to keep his composure.

“You wouldn’t understand the situation I’m in…” Soonyoung’s voice was low. He felt like he was going to break down and start coughing up roses again. You were looking at him, you had known he was in love with someone. He started crying harder.

“Soonyoung that’s not the point, we’re just worried. We don’t want anything to happen to you. Just let us help.” Seungkwan said matter of factly. You frowned. Soonyoung stood up and started waving at us to get out.

“I’m sorry, I just c-cant talk about this r-right now.” He hiccupped then shut the door. You stood there, staring at the faded brown wood of the door. He is not going to be okay.

As much as he tells you, you’re not going to listen to him.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Can’t Cover Up

[Admin Lyric: Damn, sorry that I haven’t uploaded anything in awhile. My sister (Admin Ummie) and our family are in the midst of moving so we’ve been real busy for a few months. I actually have a few fanfictions that are done but just need to be revised so I’ll try to get them up as soon as I can. Thank you for understanding. I hope that its good because I typed this at like 3 am one morning. This is inspired by one of Taeyeon’s songs Cover Up.]

Characters: Mark, Taeyong, Yukhei/ Lucas, Doyoung, Jaehyun

Genre: Fluff, Angst? (Mark needs a hug)

Word Count: 4,400+

Warnings: Language (not much)

Mark was scared, no, more like terrified. What was he supposed to do? Keep it to himself? Not the best idea when the thought was eating away at his brain cells. He needed to tell someone, if not everyone. What would they say? The mere thought of telling everyone about it made him feel nauseous. How was he supposed to put in words that he had the most biggest, enormous, gayest crush on Taeyong? Would they think he was disgusting? He hoped not.

Mark has had a crush on Taeyong since as long as he could remember. The crush only started out as admiration towards the elder, thinking he looked cool and the way he portrayed his stage presence made him look up to Taeyong. This eventually turned into him watching NCT stages (mainly Taeyong focuses) on his phone without anyone knowing. Basically this turned into an obsession with him watching Taeyong on stage. Lastly this turned into him staring at him from afar, blushing easily when they were close to each other. That’s when he knew he had a crush on him but it’s been like a whole year since he realized it and it’s only gotten worse.

It’s hard for Mark to even physical be around him without him getting nervous and anxious. He always tried to make sure he was around others when Taeyong was in the room with him. The only one who knew about his crush was Doyoung. He had known since he saw Mark’s watch history on YouTube filled with Taeyong fancams. He eventually asked Mark about it and he cried being afraid he was gonna tell someone. Doyoung assured him he wouldn’t tell anyone without asking first.

Skipping ahead, NCT U was about to fly to Ukraine to film there music video for Boss, their upcoming comeback with 2 new debuting members. Mark had always been a little afraid of flying so he took the opportunity to sit next to Johnny for some “comfortableness,” he’d never admit that to him though. Luck wasn’t really on his side today considering the fact Ten was going with them which means he would have to sit near someone else, cause Ten tends to whine if he doesn’t get to sit near him. And he also found out last minute Ten was going to be in a sub unit with Taeyong.

Not that he was mad or anything…but that’s exactly what he was saying. Why wasn’t he in the sub-unit with Taeyong? Although he was pretty sure he’d pass out due to extreme exhaustion and probably avoid him, but none the less, couldn’t he have got an option to do it with him anyway? He was sure that someone had planned this. As much as he tried to avoid him, he still wanted to have Taeyong’s full attention on only him. At that thought Mark sighed, running his fingers through his hair out of frustration. Was he really that selfish? To have one of his hyungs ignore the other members because of his own infatuation, was beyond his imagination. Why would he think something like that? He closed his eyes and tilted his head up towards the sky. It was snowing. He felt delicate snowflakes fall and melt onto his lukewarm skin, coloring his eyelashes a pretty white. His lips curved upward at the thought of being able to expand and broaden his verses on the airplane with the soothing feel of the way the snow fell lightly on to the ground, covering it like a blanket.

He opened his eyes and looked at the snowflakes falling from the sky, drifting towards his face. They reminded him of Taeyong. Bright, vibrant, captivating, free. He was just…perfect. Why must he make him act so dumb? He would just stand there and Mark would get all hot and start blushing when he looked at him. His sharp yet soft doe like eyes, long eyelashes, autumn red hair that pared perfectly with his gorgeous sun kissed skin. His beautiful carved nose, sexy chiseled jawline and perfectly shaped lips, ah, those lips. He’s definitely thought of kissing his lips more then he could count on both of his hands. His personality adorned his looks perfectly. So patient and loving yet reassuring and logical. His aura was so relaxing. He’d do whatever it was to make you in a better mood even if he wasn’t in one himself. He was so selfless. That’s what he loved most about Taeyong.

He shook his head. Think of something else. You need to act astray when it comes to your feelings. Why are you so weak? He sighed again. He missed Vancouver. He didn’t have to think and do so much there. It was a lot easier for to him to get things done without constant thoughts of over excursion to his body. He tilted his head back down and sighed again to only realize everyone was outside already, waiting for their manager. He hadn’t noticed Taeyong’s piercing gaze burning holes into his forehead or more like he tried to avoid it. Jaehyun had said something to Mark in plain English, but with Taeyong staring at him so intensely, made him forget how to speak.

“Huh?” Jaehyun rolled his eyes.

“I had asked you if you were okay. You looked lost in thought.” Mark’s eyes widened. Had he not been mindful to not cover up his feelings today? He’d been so good with keeping his stress, worries and depression down in the abyss of his distorted mind. With every unit coming back within the month put a lot of stress on him, but he didn’t want anyone to notice. He didn’t know what to say to him. He wasn’t gonna say he’s fine because Jaehyun’s a hawk, he’d know if he was lying.

Jaehyun sighed. It was practically written on his forehead. STRESS. He could see it. Mentally but mostly physically. Mark had lost some weight since they started their diets again but it was worse then their last comeback. He was just worried. He patted Mark’s head and smiled crookedly.

“Don’t overwork yourself. If you’re tired, say so. I don’t want you to die because you’re not healthy.” Jaehyun had a frown on his face. If only he had known the real causes of Mark’s spacing out and stress. Mark was used to the overly packed schedule. It didn’t bother him that much anymore. He was still worried about it, but that wasn’t the main cause of all of his problems. It was Taeyong. The same Lee Taeyong that had watched over Mark, made sure he was okay and wasn’t over doing it in practice. The same Lee Taeyong that had comforted him when he was home sick and crying about missing his family. The same Lee Taeyong that he was head over heels for. He was still staring at him after all which didn’t make the situation any better. Mark just coughed and smiled at Jaehyun.

“I’ll be fine hyung, I promise I won’t cause any harm to myself.” Jaehyun grinned widely and gave Mark a pat on his back.

“Good.” Jaehyun beamed and walked away. Mark sighed heavy. He just wanted to go back to the dorm and sleep.

Everyone arrived at the airport not long after the manager came outside. Mark had been listening to music the whole time, zoning out, skipping songs that reminded him of… that someone. He wanted to feel normal again. Sometimes he wished he never found out about his feelings for him, maybe he’d be able to be around him and not feel the need to run away. Maybe he’d be more at ease, maybe- Someone pulled out one of his ear buds. He jumped. It was Yukhei.

“Mark, we gotta go.” Mark looked at everyone walking away from him and slightly jogged up to the rest of them. He bumped into a guy taking pictures of the rest of the members and fell straight onto his ass. You’ve gotta be kidding me. He just carelessly walked into someone and is now being trampled over? It hurt like hell. People touching him, not regularly but inappropriately, trying to get his attention, people yelling in his face. He tried to get up only to fall back down again due to the amount of fans around him. He felt a pair of hands around his waist and internally screamed from being scared it was a saesang fan. He was indeed wrong, it was Taeyong.

He helped him up off the ground and pulled Mark towards him, putting both his hands on either side of his shoulders out of protection. Taeyong gave the crowd of people a dirty look and pulled Mark closer to himself. If looks could kill, they’d probably be dead by now. Why did he help Mark if he was no where near him when walking through the airport? Mark hadn’t dared to ask, afraid to make Taeyong upset any further. He kept his question to his self. Taeyong didn’t say anything, trying to get his mind off of the people who almost hurt Mark.

As soon as they were out of the paparazzi’s sight, Taeyong moved his gaze to Mark and started to search his face and his body. Mark yelped as his hands went straight under his shirt. What was he doing!?

“You’re not hurt anywhere right?” Mark gave no answer and pushed Taeyong’s hands away. He looked up at him since he was kneeling. Mark blushed, a light rosy pink dusted his cheeks as he looked away.

“I’m fine hyung. D-don’t worry about what hap-“

“No.” Mark looked at Taeyong through his peripheral vision and frayed his eyebrows together. Taeyong sighed and stood up. “I’m not gonna just forget about-“

“Hyung I’m okay. I wouldn’t lie t-to you.” Why do I keep stuttering? I know he’s beautiful but I need to keep my composure. Taeyong nodded slowly and frowned. He opened his mouth to say something but their manager called for him. Mark was grateful for that. Did he have some type of luck today even if it’s tiny? He wondered. Did Doyoung tell their manager!? No he wouldn’t, why would he? He was probably over analyzing it, he had been over analyzing things a lot lately. He sighed.

Everyone was eventually on the plane, Mark sat by himself in the back listening to music like he always did and working on his studies. He did still go to school so he had to make sure he was on top of things that involved it. He’d been falling off a bit, no one actually realized but himself. He needed to concentrate, but Taeyong is taking up his mind and is causing him to stall. He closed his laptop and tilted his head back on the seat. Get a hold of yourself! If you don’t now you’ll hurt yourself! No one can do it for you Mark! He started to get a headache from arguing with himself. He needed to throw whatever doubts and distractions he had out the window and finish his studies or he’ll end up falling behind. Mark really just wanted to go back to Canada.

They ended up in Ukraine not that long after getting on the plane. Only cause Mark fell asleep it went really fast. He was disappointed in himself for falling asleep and not finishing his work, but with his pact schedule who wouldn’t fall asleep? Their manager had explained to them that there was only 4 rooms so someone would have to share a room with him and the rest split off in to twos. Mark had a mini panic attack and almost had to excuse himself to the bathroom when their manager said that he picked the arrangements for the rooming situation. He knew that their manager would room him and Taeyong together. Doyoung looked at Mark, fear had slapped him in the face. He put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and leaned close to him.

“You’re rooming with Xuxi, I made sure manager hyung didn’t question me about why you guys should be in a room together. I mean you guys are the same age.” Mark breathed out a heavy sigh he didn’t know he was holding and smiled.

“Thanks hyung.”

“No problem, I got you.” Doyoung winked. Mark hit him slightly on his arm and laughed when he pouted. He walked to the hotel room with Yukhei, talking about some random anime he watched, he started to feel drowsy. He was used to jet lag and him constantly feeling tired but he felt drained, lifeless even. He didn’t do much that day but his internal battles had been making him feel like this. He started to drown out Yukhei, not on purpose, but due to his head pounding and lack of focus. Mark pushed the door open and flopped down on the queen sized mattress closest to him. He sighed and closed his eyes and put his arm over his face. Not a headache, migraine. He rubbed his eyes with his fists and yawned. Why was he so exhausted? He started dosing off. The mattress was so soft, comfort hugged him, inviting him in to a deep slumber. His body felt heavy, he was almost-

“Mark! You cant just fall asleep on me like that!” Mark jerked up quickly. Yukhei’s voice was loud. He stretched and yawned again.

“Sorry bro.” Yukhei gave Mark a serious look and sat next to him. Mark was started feeling nervous. Yukhei rarely ever got serious.

“Okay, spill. What’s been bothering you? Or more like who’s been bothering you.” Mark was taken back. What makes him think he’s not fine? Well he’s really not fine but he’s not telling him that. He didn’t say anything. Yukhei sighed and shook his head.

“Mark, I’m not gonna tell anyone!” Yukhei laughed. Mark turned his head in his direction and shushed him.

“Be quite! Someone might hear you!” He half whispered half yelled. Yukhei rolled his eyes and just stared at Mark till he said something. Mark sighed and pulled his knees up to his chest and put face in his lap.

“Well… How can I be sure I can trust your judgment!?”

“Mark, Doyoung hyung told me to switch rooms with Taeyong hyung. He was supposed to be in here with you and I was supposed to be with Jaehyun hyung. I know it has to do with Yongie but, I don’t know what it is exactly…” Mark didn’t say anything, instead he got his laptop out of his bag, opened it and typed out what he was gonna say without having to say it out loud. He was embarrassed. Would Yukhei think he was disturbing? Would he not wanna be friends with him anymore?

“What are you doing? Yah! Just tell me already, please!” Mark shushed him again and Yukhei apologized to him. Mark was hesitant with showing him the documents page on his laptop. One, this shit is very, very personal, two, Taeyong doesn’t know Mark’s feelings and he’s afraid he might tell him and three, it’s kinda…long. Yukhei pouted angrily and snatched Mark’s laptop from his sweaty palms. Mark gasped and hid behind a pillow that was on the mattress. Why was he so stupid? He shouldn’t have wrote all that. After awhile of silence, Yukhei moved over to Mark and gave him a hug. Mark was confused, why was he hugging him? Shouldn’t he be mad and disgusted with him?

“YOU’RE SO CUTE MARK-AH!! YOU’RE IN LOVE~~!” Mark hit him and buried his face further in the pillow.

“Stop, someone’s gonna hear you.” Yukhei managed to move the pillow away from Mark and have him look directly at him. Mark seemed tense. From the way his stature looked, he seemed some what off.

“Why would you think I’d not like you? Is it cause your gay?” Mark nodded his head softly, looking down at his hands. Yukhei rolled his eyes.

“You gotta be shittin me right? Mark, you’re the coolest person I know. You put up with my shit for one. Two you are in three subunits after all and you’re still kickin it, and three, you’re balancing all of that with school, taking care of dream, and having your own secret love life. That’s something I don’t think I would ever be able to pull off. Who gives a fuck if you’re gay? That doesn’t bother me one bit. And if it bothers anyone else then fuck them.” Mark just sat there. He was shocked. Did he really mean this? Wait of course he did. Why do I always make everything seem so damn difficult?

“Wow…Thanks, I don’t think I’ve ever actually got a compliment like that before. It feels kinda weird. Sorry for being delusional” Yukhei smiled and ruffled Mark’s hair.

“Don’t apologize bro. What makes you think you’re delusional?”

“I’ve just been so downcast lately to the point where my cognition of how I view everyone and everything has changed. I wish it hadn’t but I feel like it won’t completely change my view on things, as long as I have you guys… besides Taeyong…” Yukhei frowned. Why does Mark think like this? Yukhei wished he didn’t beat himself up about useless stuff like this.

“Why don’t you think he returns your feelings?” Mark stopped his soon to be speech and froze. Why would he return Mark’s feelings? Mark shook his head.

“He obviously likes someone else, he told me before. He said to me one day that he had feelings for someone. I asked who it was and he said he didn’t wanna tell me so I just let it go. It hurt a lot. It still hurts but I can’t control who he can and can’t date. That’s out of my jurisdiction!” Yukhei gulped and looked away. Mark’s face softened. He’d been out of pocket, he should probably apolo-

“Sorry I walked in on you guys, the door was un…locked…” Mark’s eyes widened like a dear caught in headlights. He knew that voice from a mile away. It was Taeyong.

“Hey I’m gonna go ask Sicheng something, be right back.” Mark tried to protest but Yukhei didn’t listen to him one bit. He closed their hotel door behind him and left. Mark was alone with Taeyong. He was more scared then the first time they went on stage to perform The 7th Sense. His face felt like he dipped it in boiling water he was so hot. Taeyong turned around and smiled. Mark felt like he was blinded. He was too bright. I’m gonna throw up.

“Sorry I walked in on you two having such a serious conversation, I should’ve knocked.” He was too kind for his own good, if only he knew that they were talking about him. Mark wiped his sweaty hands on his pants and watched himself do it while replying a very quick, your fine, so that he didn’t have to look at him. He felt the bed dip a little and there was heat to his right. Mark turned his head towards him but didn’t realize how close their proximity was. He backed up quickly and Taeyong laughed. His cute giggles always made Mark squeal like a teenage fangirl, but he tried to ignore it this time.

“Have you been avoiding me? Well I- I mean I’ve noticed it these past few weeks but didn’t say anything till Doyoung brought it up. He seemed like he wasn’t supposed to tell me because he had this dumb panicked look on his face.” Mark opened his mouth but words didn’t come out. He can’t lie because the evidence was right in front of him, staring at him with the cutest doe eyed expression. He sighed for what seemed like the 20th time that day and nodded. Taeyong eyed him curiously and turned his entire body towards him. Mark sat in the same position, but eventually turned his body slightly to be able to see him. He immediately regretted doing so. The look on Taeyong’s face made Mark’s whole body feel heavy. Guilt was all that he felt in his heart.

“How come…no uh.. Why did you?” Taeyong’s voice came out small, weak almost. He wanted to know what he did to make Mark upset. He wanted to fix it so that they could be okay again. Mark was on the verge of tears he wanted to run. Run all the way to Doyoung and slap him right in the face. No, he shouldn’t take his anger out on him, this was his doing, not Doyoung’s.

“I…I…” Mark couldn’t speak. If he did he’d probably cry, he didn’t want Taeyong to see the weak side of him. How was he supposed to tell someone he was in love with that he loved him when he obviously likes someone else. His eyes stung and his throat hurt from holding back tears. Mark shook his head.

“I’ve just b-been a little depressed l-lately… I’m fine now.” It wasn’t actually a lie purse, he was depressed and in his own head a lot. Taeyong sighed and grabbed both of Mark’s hands.

“But it was only me you avoided, right? Why is that? I know you probably don’t wanna talk about it but I just want you to tell me the truth. Please don’t lie to me.” That’s all it took for Mark to start sobbing. Taeyong’s arms flew around Mark quickly, his sobbing grew louder. Taeyong just hugged him, whispering softly in his ear to try and calm him down. It worked after awhile. Mark’s breathing evened out, only sniffles could be heard. Taeyong still had his arms around him, drawing invisible shapes on Mark’s back with his index finger. Should Mark really tell him? Maybe he should do this for himself for once and be greedy. He lifted his head up from Taeyong’s chest. He put a hand over Taeyong’s eyes and sighed.

“Can you not look at me w-when I say this?” Taeyong nodded and closed his eyes under Mark’s hand. He moved his hand away from Taeyong’s eyes and looked at him. He couldn’t cover up his heart anymore, especially when it came to him. Maybe it was a good thing? He was happy to be around him and that’s all that mattered, but should he really be greedy? Even if Taeyong wants to know what’s wrong with him? Wouldn’t this end their close friendship? He shook his head. He need to do this or he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night anymore.

“I…I’m…I think that, uh…I’m in l- love with y-you…” Wow, I stuttered a lot. Taeyong’s eyes fluttered open prettily. He had the biggest, brightest grin on his face and Mark thought he was blinded again. Taeyong grabbed Mark and hugged him so tight, he knocked the wind out of him and he almost couldn’t breathe. Mark tapped on Taeyong’s shoulder and he let go quickly.

“I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” Mark shook his head and the worry on Taeyong’s face was gone as soon as it came and replaced with a big grin again. Mark started to think, maybe he didn’t mind getting blinded by him after all. Taeyong grabbed Mark by his arms and made him sit on his lap. Mark started blushing. Their faces were so close. Mark could see every pore, every perfection, every imperfection. He tried to look away but Taeyong put both of his hands on either side of Mark’s face preventing him from doing so. His face flushed a deeper shade of crimson. Taeyong smiled. “Cute.”

“I-Im not cute!” Mark huffed, Taeyong laughed. He put his hand over Mark’s eyes like what he did to him earlier. Mark was confused but complied and closed his eyes. Taeyong moved his hand away from his eyes and stared at his face. He loved Mark in every single way. He didn’t realize he loved Mark till a few months ago but didn’t say anything because he thought Mark only thought of him as an older brother and nothing more. He looked down at his lips and leaned in slightly, he could only feel Mark’s breathing tickling the hairs on his face. Mark grew inpatient and opened his eyes to only find Taeyong staring back at him. He couldn’t look away though. His gaze was almost hypnotic, putting him in a trance that made him lean forward.

His eyes fluttered shut when he felt Taeyong’s lips on his. His lips were softer then he imagined. Pillow soft, making him want more. Taeyong put his hands back on his face to deepen the kiss further. Mark loved the feeling of Taeyong’s lips on his. He tasted sweet, like warm milk chocolate on a summer evening. He felt like he was in paradise, only to be interrupted by oxygen tapping on his shoulder. Taeyong was the one to pull away first, putting his forehead on Mark’s like the many times he did for Mad City, but this time Mark wasn’t as shy. He kissed the tip of Taeyong’s nose. He giggled and Mark let a squeal past his lips.

“I love you too Mark. I always have, that will never ever change.” Mark put his hands on his cheeks to cover his everlasting blush. Taeyong moved his hands away from his face.

“So…does this mean that we’re dating?” Taeyong nodded. “Only if you want to.” Mark shook his head.

“Of course I want to hyung.” Mark was as shy as ever and Taeyong found it adorable. He kissed Mark’s forehead.

“Hey, what good are those lips if they’re all the way up there?” Taeyong laughed and cupped Mark’s face with his hands.

“Do you want me to kiss you?” Mark pouted. Taeyong took this opportunity to kiss him while he was caught off guard. Mark kissed him back. Taeyong smiled to much to the point they weren’t kissing anymore. Mark pouted again.

“HYUNG!” Mark whined and Taeyong laughed again. Mark hit his chest and put his head on his shoulder. He was actually happy for once. He put his arms around Taeyong and breathed in his scent. Clean laundry and cologne. He heard the door open.

“Thank god!! Hey everyone! Markyong are together now!” Fucking Doyoung. He’d have to yell at him later and thank him. He heard murmurs in the background. He didn’t care if everyone saw him sitting on Taeyong’s lap because he felt better, mentally and emotionally. Normally he’d feel embarrassed for something like this, but if it wasn’t for Doyoung slipping up, he would have never confessed to Taeyong. It was much appreciated.

He started thinking, maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea. Maybe he shouldn’t cover up his heart and true feelings anymore, maybe it won’t be so bad with the annoying overflowing schedule of his. As long as he had his members, and now Taeyong as his boyfriend, everything would be okay.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

情人眼里出西施 (Part 1)

[Admin Lyric: This will be in parts so I hope you like it!!]

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3}

情人眼里出西施 - Qínɡrén yǎn lǐ chū xīshī (Love is blind)

Characters: Minghao, Rest of Seventeen, Kyulkyung, Donghan

Genre: College Au, angst, Fluff I guess

Word Count: 2,612

Warnings: Language

You stood in front of your new school, on your phone trying to make sure you were at the right place. You knew you were at the right place, you were just stalling, scared of going to another prison for 4 to 8 years. It was your first year at university and you were nervous as hell. Not that you were scared about the amount of work you had to do or the amount of students in the school that actually gave you anxiety or you not knowing who your roommates were, but that exactly what you’re saying.

You haven’t been inside of a school in a whole entire year and yet you thought that you could be able to do this. No, I can do this you thought. As you stepped foot in side of what you thought was the entrance, your confidence went from 5% to -98%. You wanted to turn around right then and there and leave because frankly, you told yourself that you can’t do this shit, but your name was called. You sighed and tried to muster up the best fake smile you could and turned around. IT WAS SEUNGKWAN! Your eyes widened and almost popped out of your head.

You almost pissed yourself, not seeing him for a whole year made you jump up and down and run up to him, Seungkwan almost toppling over. You hugged him as tight as you could and he hugged you right back giggling, ah, you missed his cute giggles.

“Oppa! You didn’t tell me you were going to uni!” You crossed your arms and pouted.

“Aigoo!” Seungkwan patted your head and put his arms around you. “I didn’t know I was going either, hahaha!” You smiled. You missed your little friends group from high school. You, Seungkwan, Hansol, Jieqiong (we just call her Kyulkyung), and Donghan. You hung out with them almost everyday, being the only people you really got along with, you wondered if they were here too.

“Did you go straight out of high or no?”

“Nah, I didn’t think I’d actually want to go, but seeing how successful my friend Jihoon is from being here for only two years, made me want to go.” You smiled. Seungkwan was always the “just go with the flow” kind of person. Maybe that’s way you had a crush on him in high school, he was the complete opposite of you. He was so patient with everyone and always sweet to others, but he was still pretty much a savage.

You two had actually dated for about a month. You guys only broke up due to the feeling of you two having more of a brother sister relationship. Heck you didn’t even kiss, but the good news was that you never grew uncomfortable with him after you broke up which was good on your part because you two are a lot closer now.

“I actually came down here to get you.” You looked at him with a confused expression, your head tilted to the side. He noticed and laughed. “I got the listing of who was supposed to be my roommates and I immediately saw your name and ran down here because I missed my best friend.” You cooed at him and patted his head like he did to you earlier.

“Do you know who else is gonna be roommates with us?” “Ahhh, OH YEAH!!” You flinched at his enthusiasm. You had always been used to it, but not seeing him for a year you’d forgotten how loud he was. You giggled.

“It said you, me, someone named Wen Junhui, and someone named Kim Dahyun.” To be honest, you were nervous. You have never really been okay with the thought of roommates. You had asked your parents about you just staying with them but they disagreed, saying that you need to be more comfortable around others you don’t know which includes being in a dorm. You were happy though, the thought of you and Seungkwan causing havoc when you’re together makes you happy the two were roomed together. One thing was going through your mind. Did this Junhui person speak Korean? As soon as you heard their name, you knew they weren’t from Korea, possibly China?

You had learned quite a bit of Mandarin to help out your friend Jieqiong when she first moved from China to Korea. You thought that it wouldn’t help her because you weren’t fluent but learning simple words really made her feel comfortable. After you becoming friends with her, you two helped each other out with learning Hangul and Mandarin. She picked up quickly on Hangul while you were a bit slower at learning it. Korean wasn’t your native tongue so making friends was difficult when you were younger which made you relate to her, and that’s how you met Hansol. He was from New York and spoke English fluently even though he’s lived in Korea all his life, you still felt happy that you could speak to someone in your native language.

“Do you think we’ll grow accustom to ‘living’ with them?” Seungkwan shrugged.

“Maybe, if we can get along with them. But anyways, did you need help with your stuff?” You shook your head.

“Nah, my dad is coming later with my stuff so he’ll probably do it.” Seungkwan pouted and laughed. “You can help if you really want to.” He smiled brightly, almost too brightly.

“Alrighty! YAH! WE NEED TO SEE IF HANSOL IS HERE!!!” You didn’t have time to respond because he was already dragging you deeper into campus to look for Hansol.

“Seungkwan if you keep pulling me so damn hard I’m gonna fall!” You tried to get out of his grasp but failed.

“I’ll let you go as soon as we find out if Hansol is here or not and I’m pretty sure your not gonna fall if I’m holding on to you.” You smiled, at least he cared, but he was wrong. You tripped over a rock and fell flat on your face. You tried not to move, feeling really embarrassed you sighed. You heard people laughing at you. You felt someone crouch beside you. You had thought it was Seungkwan so you turned your head, but it was a really handsome boy you haven’t recognized before. He helped you up and dusted you off a little. You tilted your head away from him, your face red from embarrassment.

“Your nose is bleeding.” Your eyes widened and turned towards him and grabbed the tissue he was holding in his hand, then turned around to wipe your nose. Where the hell was Seungkwan?

“Thank you.”

“Your welcome….are you okay?” He touched your shoulder for you to turn around. He put his hand on your chin and move your head around, looking to see if you were hurt anywhere else. To his dismay, you weren’t and he was glad. He smiled.

“I’m fine. I think if I keep my head up for awhile, it’ll stop bleeding.” You leaned your head up. He frowned then gave you more tissues.

“Do you need help finding your friend?” SEUNGKWAN!! He totally left you!! You frowned. You were frustrated. You had fell and embarrassed yourself in front of strangers, not only was it Seungkwan’s fault you fell but he left you. It was actually quite sad because you weren’t even surprised.

“Oh shit, uhh, I can’t see you but sure I guess?” You were hesitant because not only did you not know him, you didn’t know where you were either. Making things worse your nose was probably broken and you couldn’t see.

“Don’t worry I’ll help you out.” He grabbed your hand and started heading towards the main office. Your neck hurt from looking up but if you wanted your nose to stop bleeding, you had to keep it that way. Eventually the dude stopped walking so you stopped too. You tilted your head back down.

“I THOUGHT YOU WERE BEHIND ME AND THEN YOU WEREN’T AND I TRIED TO LOOK FOR YOU TH- is your nose bleeding?” You rolled you eyes at Seungkwan. You turned towards that dude again and stuck out your hand.

“Yeah, you left her hanging dude. Well falling I guess.” He smirked. Your face flushed. Were you that embarrassing? You thought he didn’t find it funny but apparently he did. You were kind of hoping he would be nicer.

“Thanks for helping me out, uhh…” You fidget a little, you didn’t know his name and didn’t know how to ask. You weren’t ever comfortable with strangers but you sure as hell will try. He looked at your hand and looked back up at you, his hands still in his pockets.

“I’ll shake your hand and tell you my name if I see you again.” He winked then started walking away. Your hand fell down to your side. You frowned a little. You called out to him. You had no idea why you did but you really wanted to know his name, he was cute after all.

“Can’t I get a hint or a nickname?” He turned his head towards you and Seungkwan.

“The8.”

You opened your mouth to thank him but he walked away. Seungkwan walked up to you and stood next to you, your mouth still open. He reached his hand up to you jaw and closed you mouth.

“Well, he was a bit of a douche huh?”

“Yup, I definitely do NOT want to see him again.”

-

“Is this all of your stuff?” Seungkwan said out of breathe and in disbelief as he eyed the incredibly small pile of boxes in the dorm. You huffed.

“Yeah, I threw out a lot of my things so I didn’t have to bring them all here.” Seungkwan sat on the floor rubbing his back. “I told you, you didn’t have to help.”

“It’s a small amount of stuff but fuck, why are they so heavy?”

“Books.”

“Books?”

“Boo Seungkwan! You’ve known me since our first year of high school and you forgot how much I love books?” You put a hand to your chest as if you were hurt. He got up, wiped his pants off and slapped your arm softly.

“I was kidding.”

“Are you sure because-“ You were cut off by the front door opening and a head was peeking through it. You had jumped when you saw who it was.

“Han fucking solo, what the fuck?!!” You ran up to him and gave him a hug and got pushed over by Seungkwan. He was practically in love with him, maybe not but they were close and you had definitely shipped them without them knowing.

“Y/N! I told you not to call me that��” He pouted. You just gave him another hug.

“Fine, I’ll stop. BUT you could be of help.” Hansol groaned.

“I knew I shouldn’t have fucking came here!!”

“No, NO! I AM NOT GONNA BE THE ONLY WHO HELPED HER. YOU’RE HELPING PAL! I HAD TO CARRY SO MANY BOXES FULL OF BOOKS UP THE STAIRS AND-“

“I’ll help I guess. I missed you both anyway.” Seungkwan looked at you and you looked at him. You both ran up to him squishing him in a big hug.

“I can’t breathe well.”

“How’d you find out we were here?” You looked at him curiously. Your head was titled up a little to see him properly, arms still around him. He smiled. He put his arms back around you.

“Jihoon hyung. I’m roommates with him. Our dorm is like four doors down”

“I’ll come visit you often oppa!” You tapped his nose and he laughed.

“Can yall start speaking Korean again please because I can’t understand shit.”

Eventually everything was unpacked and set up in your room. You made yourself a reminder that you had to decorate your room and door soon because they both looked bland. You walked into the living area to find two of your best friends playing hand games. You smiled to yourself, they are still children at heart. You heard the front door open again and saw a really cute boy who was small enough for you to hug properly. You almost went to squish his cheeks but you didn’t know him, that would be inappropriate of you. Was this one of you roommates?

“Seungkwan, I need your voice.” Next thing you knew he was out the door as fast as he walked in. I guess he wasn’t your roommate. That guy wanted Seungkwan to sing for him or something? Well you weren’t really surprised by it considering the fact that he did a lot of singing competitions while he was in high school and his voice was amazing!! You actually haven’t heard him sing since his last competition you went to which was about 2 years ago before you graduated.

“That’s my queue, I’m off!” He did a summer sault and spun around and left. You and Hansol laughed at him.

“Who was that?” Hansol looked at you confused.

“You don’t know Jihoon hyung?”

“His name doesn’t ring a bell, all though Seungkwan mentioned his name earlier.” You noticed Hansol start to smile. He eventually started to laugh.

“Remember 10th grade, me and you went to that one store that was next to our school because they had juicy juice there?” You nodded your head slowly.

“Remember that one guy who was in his last year of high school and he worked there so we like dead ass saw him everyday and made fun of his height till the point he wouldn’t let us back in the store?” You froze. Hansol was on the floor laughing, he probably wasn’t breathing. You chuckled which then turned into a laughing fit. You loved those stupid high school days with Hansol. You had met Seungkwan through Hansol because they lived next door to each other after Seungkwan moved to Seoul from Jeju. All of you instantly clicked like a front door closing or opening…again…

“There isn’t any kidnappers here right? B-because I’m an adult!” You had eventually calmed down from your laughing fit, but after hearing that, you had started laughing again. Hansol was dazed, looking at you laugh which made him laugh again as well.

“T-THAT’S NOT FUNNY! I actually thought there were robbers or something…” You stopped laughing at the tall brunette in front of you and stood up.

“I guess your my roommate?”

“Yup I am!! Are you Dahyun, Seungkwan or Y/N?”

“I’m Y/N, It’s nice to finally meet you.” You stuck out your hand which he gladly accepted unlike that dude from earlier. Thinking about him made you curious about who he was, but a part of was unsure. Maybe you should avoid him. You embarrassing yourself in front of him made you not want to be around him. Being afraid of others was not a good way for meeting new people.

“I’m Wen Junhui, but just call me Jun if you want.” He smiled. He was really adorable. You wondered if Dahyun would be nice and if she was a girl. You didn’t feel comfortable being in a dorm with three guys.

“Is this Seungkwan or Dahyun?” He pointed at Hansol. You shook your head.

“Oh, no that’s my friend Hansol, he was helping me move my stuff in here. Seungkwan will be back in a minute.” You were shy of course, Junhui could sense that so he didn’t ask you further questions. You were thankful.

“Junhui, I thought you were getting the fucking beer? Oh, hello again.” You looked to your right to see the dude who was as blunt as ever, The8.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Summer Love (Part 3) Final

Admin Ummie!!

Words - 1K Characters - Matthew X Reader, Jiwoo, Somin and J.Seph Genre - Fluff

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]

Sorry it took so long!

Sorry for any spelling errors :)

-I hope you all like it!-

You reach your aunt house and she shows you to the room you’ll be staying in. She says “I’m sorry about what happened with your boyfriend” You scrunch up your lips then say “He not my boyfriend” She says “OH!! Okay, I’m still sorry.. I’ll bring you some beef stew just like when you were little” You both smile and you say “Thank you for everything” She walks over to you and gives you a kiss on the cheek then walks out of the room shutting the door behind her. You open your phone to see two messages. One from Somin saying “I’m still sorry about everything. I hope to see you soon” You reply back saying” It’s fine! I’m not mad at you. Trust me, just the two of us should hangout tomorrow. Not in the apartment though.” Then you see Matthew messaged you saying “Hey, when can I see you again?” You take a deep breath and reply back saying “Hi.. I’m not sure yet. I just need to clear my head a little bit.” You shut off your phone screen. You say to yourself “Why do I feel so bad?”

-The Next Morning at Matthew’s apartment-

Somin gets dressed and Matthew walks over to her and says “Hey, where are you going?” Somin says “I’m leaving with a friend. She’ll be here to get me but after that, we’re leaving.” Matthew says “You’re leaving already? It’s not even twelve yet” Somin looks at him and says “it’s called spending the day together” They hear the doorbell ring and Matthew says “I’ll get it..” while lightly jogging to the door.

You’re standing at the door waiting, your eyes light up as Matthew opens the door. When Matthew sees you, his face looks brighter. You slowly say “Hi” Matthew just hugs you and doesn’t say anything. You hug him back and then he responds “Why are you here?” You stop hugging him and say “I’m hanging out with Somin today.. can I come in?” He says “Oh shit, yeah.. come in” You walk inside and see Somin. She says “oh shit Y/N, I have to go to see my mom real quick. You can wait here. It wont be long. I’m sorry!” You say “don’t worry. Take your time, I hope everything is okay”

A few minutes later she leaves. You sit on the couch and pull out your phone. Matthew asks you “Do you want some coffee?” You say “Sure. Thanks” As he’s making the coffee it gets quiet. He comes over and sits on the couch kind of far from you, waiting for the coffee to be done. He says “How did you seep?” You say “I slept fine.. you?” He says “oh I slept alright, I tried to sleep in the bed again but it was weird” You look at him and day “I’m sorry. There’s a certain thing I did to actually help me sleep. Come on, I’ll show you.” You walk to his room and he follows you. You say “okay get in bed. Put this pillow between your legs and this pillow under your head. Is it comfy? Oh wait and when you sleep, don’t open the window.. turn the AC on instead”

He sits up moving the pillows. You hear the coffee maker beep and you say “I’ll make the coffee.” As you walk Matthew grabs your hand and says “Y/N.. come here real quick” You walk back towards him, he’s sitting on the side of the bed and you’re standing in between his legs. You look at him and say “Yeah?” He just looks at you and pulls your face towards his. He kisses you and has his hands on your face. When he stop you stand there and say “um. I have to go turn the coffee maker off” But instead of leaving the room you two kiss again. The coffee maker beeps more but you two ignore it. J.Seph walks out of his room yelling “DAMN I UNDERSTAND SOMEONE MADE COFFEE BUT CAN YOU TURN THE MACHINE OFF AFTER IT BEEPS?!” Matthew says “I’ll make you some coffee, okay?” He kisses you before leaving the room and shutting the door.

A few minutes later he walks in with coffee in his hands and box of crumb cake in between one arm and a knife in his mouth. You laugh and go to help him. He shuts the door and you both sit your coffee near the bed. As you sit yours down, he hugs you from behind . You turn around and kiss him quickly, then you get your coffee and take a sip. You sit on the bed and say “Matthew, can we talk?” He sits beside you and says “I know what you’re going to say.. I just really like you. When we were younger I was going to ask you to go to the spring dance with me but then you moved. I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend that night but we didn’t see each other again. After I saw you the other day everything ran back into my head and I know it’s weird because we just saw each other again after 5 years but I like you.” You smile and say “Now I feel bad because of the dance thing. I don’t care how weird it seems or how short of a time its been. I like you too” Matthew pulls you into a hug and kisses you. He says “Will you go on a date with me?” You nod and ask “When?” He has his arms around you and says “tomorrow night” You say “okay..” You grab your coffee but as you move Matthew hugs onto your waist. You laugh and he says “Y/N.. can I tell you something?” You turn around to face him as you sip your coffee and say “yeah” He sits up and sits closer to you. You get a little worried so you put your coffee back down. He says “you’re beautiful” You move your hair out of your face and smile saying “Thank you, you’re very handsome”

-Date Night-

Your aunt walks in the room as you’re going through all of your clothes. She asks “Um.. What are you doing?” You look back at her quickly and say “I’m trying to find an outfit.. I have a date tonight” Your aunts eyes widen and she asks “Boy? Girl?” You reply “Boy.. I told you about him. He’s going to come pick me up so you can possibly meet him! If you meet him.. Don’t embarrass me. My mother does that already” Your aunt laughs and says “Alright. I won’t embarrass you”

She walks out of the room and you put a red mini dress with black high heels. You wear light makeup and put waves in your hair. As you’re getting ready you get nervous. It’s been a while since you’ve been on a date. The thought of Jiwoo hating you makes you a little worried as well. You’re dressed and ready but you keep looking into the mirror on the dresser. You hear the doorbell ring and your aunt yells to you “SWEETIE! MATTHEW IS HERE!!” You grab your black purse and walk down the stairs.

As Matthew sees you he smiles, his smile makes you feel warm inside and you feel more relaxed. Matthew walks up to you and hugs you. He says “You look amazing. Are you ready?” You say “Y-Yeah”

As you walk to the car you realize why you’re so nervous, you’ve liked him since elementary school, he was your first crush. You’ve wanted to be with him for a long time. You didn’t think you’d ever see him again. You also thought that he’d have a girlfriend. He’s always been handsome and you’ve always been a little nervous with him.

Matthew looks at you and says “Y/N.. do you want to know where we’re going?” You look at him smiling and say “yeah.” He looks back at the road and says “well I remembered when we were little and you kept telling me what kind of date you wanted to go on” Your eyes widen as you as “You remember that?!” He chuckles and says “yeah”

When you were you younger (17) you always had a date that you wanted to go on. It was to a restaurant your parents would always go to, get ice cream and eat it at the park while sitting on the swings, then go for a walk on the beach. You’re surprised he even remembers that at all.

You arrive at the restaurant in awe to see how fancy it looks. Feeling excited because you’re finally on a date with the man you’ve liked for years. You walk to a table reserved for two, Matthew pulls out a chair for you and sits down across from you. You get two glasses of Champaign and get steak with potatoes. The entire time you were there, you felt like you were dreaming.

You reach the park and Matthew walks to you with two ice cream cones in hand. You smile wide and take the ice cream, leaving a kiss on Matthews cheek. You smile saving “Thank you Matthew” He kisses your cheek and says “you’re welcome” You sit on the swings and eat your ice cream with him. He looks at you and says “Y/N..?” You look at him not saying anything. He meets you with a quick kiss. His lips tasting like Rocky Road ice cream. He says “Come on, we still have one more stop to make”

He brings you to the beach and you run to the water feeling it wash up on your feet. Matthew runs behind you and holds your from behind, kissing the side of your neck. He says into your ear “Did you enjoy our date?” You turn around to face him and say “yeah, I did” He kisses you hard and you kiss him back. He pulls away and say “so last question, will you be my girlfriend?” You nod and kiss him more, feeling like you’re on cloud 9. Finally with the man you like.

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

The Accident

Words - 2K Characters - Taehyung x Reader Genre - Fluff/Angst

Admin Ummie!!

Summary - You’ve been with boyfriend Taehyung for 2 years and you’re celebrating your anniversary! One day after hanging out something seriously bad happens..

*I hope you all like it!*

-Sorry for any spelling errors-

It’s 2016 and you’re going to see your boyfriend of 2 years Taehyung. You met him a year prior to dating and since you first saw him, you knew that you wanted to be with him. You waited for the right time to ask him to be your boyfriend but in the end he asked you instead. You’ve gotten close to his friends, especially Yoongi.. mainly because you two have the same attitude and personality.

You’re walking to meet Taehyung at your favorite restaurant. (The place you two had met) You arrive and see his handsome face shine brighter than ever at a table for two. He walks to you meeting you with a tight hug and a kiss on the lips. You smile to yourself feeling your face heat up. He walks you to the table and you sit down happy as ever.

Taehyung “Y/N.. I just wanted to take you out for our two year anniversary. I love you so much. You make my life a better place. Thank you for being mine. Happy 2 years!” You two smile as you tap your glasses of Champaign together and take a sip. You can’t remember the last time you’ve been this happy with someone before.

You “Taehyung.. I love you too. I don’t know what I would do without you. I’m glad I met you”

After dinner you two take a taxi back to his apartment since you both had a few drinks . You get there and see Jungkook on the couch, half asleep with one hand in a bag of chips. You and Taehyung chuckle and walk to his room. Taehyung hands you a shirt so you can go to sleep. As you change into his shirt, you look over and see Taehyung in bed with his arms open for you. You look at him and smile.

Taehyung “Come lay with me!” You “Haha okay! I’m coming”

You lay down with him and feel his arms around you. Like you’re wrapped in a sheet of protection.

Taehyung “I love you Y/N. I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight” You “Goodnight Taehyung. I love you too”

He kisses you one more time before you both fall asleep. You dream about going to New York City with Taehyung. Seeing the statue of liberty and going to Time Square, eating at Five Guys and trying New York style pizza.

You wake up to the smell of coffee and turn over to see Taehyung still asleep, feeling his arms wrapped around you. You kiss his neck twice and slowly get up following the smell of fresh coffee. You walk into the kitchen and see Seokjin cooking and not even notice you behind him. You get a mug off of the counter and pour yourself some coffee and he finally turns around while almost falling from getting scared.

You “Sorry!” You grab the creamer and sugar and continue to make your coffee. Jin “It’s okay haha. Sorry I didn’t hear you. When did you get here?” You “I got here last night after having dinner with Taehyung. It was our two year anniversary last night” Jin “OH! That’s right. He kept talking about it yesterday. He wouldn’t stop saying that’s it’s been two years and that he needs everything to be perfect!” You “Really?” Jin “Yeah. He was really nervous”

After talking, you take your coffee and walk back into Taehyung’s room and get back into bed with him. You move his arms to wrap around you again. You look at him as he sleeps and you smile while asking yourself “How did I get to lucky” You close your eyes and remember the day you met.

-2015-

You had a dinner party with your family and friends for your birthday. You we’re finally 18 and graduating high school while finally getting a job so your family thought it was the perfect time to have a party. The waiter walks to you with a big ice cream sundae and everyone begins singing happy birthday to you. You look over and see a group of men and one of them has a smile that melts your heart. You look at him while they all sing happy birthday.

He notices you looking and smiles at you. A little while after you eat the sundae you walk over to the table he’s sitting at.

You “Hi. Um my name is Y/N. How are you?” Taehyung “Hi! I’m Taehyung. I’m alright. Happy Birthday by the way!”

After that little conversation, you knew that you wanted to talk to him more. You asked for his number and you two talked often, becoming friends with him and his friends and hanging out a lot.. you were bound to like him.

-2016-

Taehyung finally wakes up a little while later to find you not in the bed. Taehyung begins to look for you but you’re actually washing up. (Thankfully his bedroom has a bathroom connected to it) Taehyung finally hears the sink water running and runs to the bathroom, hugging you from behind.

Taehyung “I didn’t know where you went” You “Aww I’m sorry sweetie. I wouldn’t leave without telling you first”

He looks at you through the mirror and kisses your neck before grabbing his toothbrush to brush his teeth with you.

Taehyung “I washed the clothes that were here before.. get dressed so we can have part 2 of our anniversary” You “aw baby! Where are we going” Taehyung “I wanted to go get ice cream and take you to the zoo” You “Are you serious?!”

You kiss him quickly and run back into his room to go through the clothes you had there before. After you’re ready Namjoon takes Taehyung to pick up his car from the restaurant.

Taehyung “are you ready?” You “I’m excited!! We haven’t been to the zoo since we went on our first date”

He kisses you as you buckle your seat belt. Taehyung get a strawberry ice cream as you get vanilla. He keeps taking some of yours as you look away.

You “I really wanna see a tiger” Taehyung “We will. Just be careful”

As you reach the zoo all you can do is smile from excitement. You walk around for hours seeing every animal and getting scared of the raccoons when Taehyung tries to make you see it. As you see the tiger your eyes widen as you see each stripe shine in the sun, you smile. You grab Taehyung’s hand.

You “Can we go see the Zebras?!” Taehyung “Zebras are your favorite right?” You “Yeah! Please?!” Taehyung “Let’s go”

You get to see that zebras and you smile. You always wanted to are a zebra, last time you went there you weren’t able to see them.

You “Look how pretty they are. Thank you for today”

He grabs your face and kisses

Taehyung “Can we take a picture?” You “Yeah!”

You two arrive at Taehyung’s apartment. You flop onto his bed and sprawl out.

You “baby.. Come here before I leave please!”

He lays on the bed right next to you and holds your hand. He kisses you again and hugs you tight.

Taehyung “I don’t think you understand how much I love you”

After an hour of making out and fooling around, you get home. Your roommate Addison welcomes you with a hug. You walk into the kitchen to notice your cat needs more food.. You pick up your purse and jacket.

You “Addison! I’ll be right back! Luna needs more food!”

As you walk to the store, you notice the traffic. You look at your watch seeing that its 5oclock

Rush Hour

You wait for the red light and walk on the cross walk. As you walk, all you think about is Taehyung. Next think you know, you’re meeting with a car as they ran a red light. You feel your body hit the windshield as your head hits it harder. Your body hits the street. Another car comes towards you as you attempt to get up.

As you’re in the ambulance you see slightly and hear the men talk. Taehyung, his roommates and your parents arrive at the hospital yelling at everyone. The doctor tells everyone that you’re in a coma and they won’t be sure when you wake up.

-2018-

Taehyung is in the room with you holding your hand. Wiping tears from his eyes. Asking you to wake up and hug him. You’ve been making slow improvements over the past two years. This time you hold Taehyung’s hand and he yells for the doctor. Everyone is in the waiting room. I seems like the doctor is taking forever. He walks out slowly and pulls your parents aside. Taehyung hears your mother cry and laugh. He gets anxious.

Your mother tells him..

Mom “The good news is, she woke up. The bad news is.. she has amnesia. They said its common to get it after being in a coma.. They don’t know how long it’ll be for.. but my baby is okay”

One by one people come in to see you. Next is Taehyung.

Taehyung “Baby! How are you?” You “excuse me?” Taehyung “oh um.. I’m Taehyung. We’ve been dating for four years now” You “four years? You’re my boyfriend?” Taehyung “yeah.. we met while you had dinner with your family. Baby.. I missed you”

Taehyung starts to cry and quickly wipes off the tears

You “Taehyung. why are you crying? Why am I here?” Taehyung “You got into a car accident.. you’ve been here for two years” You “why did the car hit me?” Taehyung “I don’t know.. I.. I’m glad you’re okay. Do you want to see a video of us?” You “yeah”

He shows you a video of you both at the zoo. You’re pointing at the zebras

You “Baby! it’s a zebra! oh my god! look” Taehyung “are you happy?” You “yes! thank you for bringing me! you’re recording me?!”

He shows you another video of you sleeping on his chest. A video of your first date. A video of you crying because a song made you sad. A picture of you both eating ice cream and a picture of you with him and his roommates.

You “so you’re my boyfriend.. and we dated for four years?” Taehyung “yeah” You “don’t cry! I’ll try to remember quickly. also they told me I have amnesia.. But I’m not really sure what it is” Taehyung “I’ll tell you eventually. I love you”

He hugs you and kisses your head slowly realizing that you might not ever remember him.

You “I love you too”

He smiles as you say that. He walks out of the hospital crying

You sit in the hospital bed and see your phone sitting on the desk. Luckily it’s not cracked. You reach over and grab it, seeing your wallpaper is a picture of you with Taehyung. You turn the screen back off and wipe your eyes. You try to figure out how to send a message.

You “Taehyung.. I’m sorry”

Your mom walks in the room and you put the phone down and wipe your eyes again.

Mom “we have to leave and get more clothes.. I’ll get you some pizza okay?” You “do I like pizza?” Mom “yeah, you love pizza” You “okay”

-2 weeks later-

You’re finally home from being at the hospital for two years. You had to learn how to walk again which was pretty hard. You walk into the house and you look around. You see a cat run to you and meow at you. You pet it and it licks you, a girl (Addison) walks to you and hugs you tight.

Addison “I missed you. it hasn’t been the same without you”

Your mom walks you to your room and your eyes widen as you see all of the pictures on the walls

You “T-That’s Taehyung” Your mom “yeah, he loves you a lot”

You walk over to a stuffed animal sitting near your window and you pick it up. You remember the doctor saying that you might get headaches or possibly fall after remembering things.

As you pick it up, you fall down and your mom catches you

Your mom “Are you okay?” You “yeah, can you call Taehyung after you leave and tell him to come over?”

You get into bed and fall asleep for a while. Waking up to the sound of Taehyung’s voice as he walks in the room. You see him and get up quickly, hugging him tight. Tears drip onto his shoulder.

Taehyung “baby.. Y/N are you okay?” You “Taehyung… I-I missed you. I saw the stuffed animal and.. I.. I’m sorry I left you” Taehyung “don’t say sorry!! it’s not your fault. I love you. I waited for 2 years to hear you talk to me” You “I don’t remember everything. I remember when we went to dinner and to your house and fell asleep together. I’ll try to remember soon. I promise”

Taehyung “Take your time. I’m here for you no matter what happens. I love you” You “I love you too”

Taehyung kisses you and lays in bed with you until you fall asleep. He whispers..

“I’ll love you forever. No matter what happens, you’ll always be my angel.. We’ll take time to remember everything. Y/N .. I love you. Never forget that”

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

I really like the mystic messenger fic!!!!

Admin Lyric: THANKS!!! I didn't think it would be good enough to put up actually. I'm working on the other parts now so please anticipate them being up shortly!! :)

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Sorry we've been inactive lately, we're going to get some more stuff up as soon as we can :)

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Text To Your Heart (Pt. 1)

[Admin Lyric: This fanfiction is based of an app called Mystic Messenger. The other parts of this are going to have a lot more text rather than text messages. Each part will be up relatively shortly. I hope you like it.]

Note: This series is gonna be put on hold till further notice

Characters: Reader, NCT 127, Shannon (friend)

Word Count: 366

Genre: Fluff / App Au

Warnings: Language

To be frank, you really didn’t know how you got to this point. You standing at you’re front door, looking at this really cute boy, who looks way too familiar for your liking, in front of you. Ever since you downloaded that messaging app, everything has been really odd in your life.

1 Day Earlier 

You were watching Just Be Joyful JBJ (staring at you’re sexy ass bias) and re-watching Produce 101 Season 2 when suddenly one of your best friends texts you. 

You were quite confused by what she said but clicked on the link anyway. As soon as you click on the link it takes you to the play store and the app immediately started downloading. You read the name out load, which read Messenger App. You didn’t know what this app was for but you were kind of interested. After the app installed you clicked on it. There was a load screen that said create account, which you pressed. You created your account while in thought about whether you should eat something or not. 

Eventually you asked yourself, why would Shannon send a me messaging app if she said that the game is fun and addicting? You shock your head. Maybe you were over thinking and it’s some kind of fake app that let’s you interact with different scenarios like horror and etc. It eventually took you to a chat room with a bunch of strangers. To be honest, you were quite confused and wondered why you listened to Shannon sometimes. You paused, taking a look at what they were saying.

You were amused at the fact that you woke up not long ago and yet you had befriended 9 boys in less then a hour. You were in a daze and almost forgot about the fact that you had to get to class or your teacher would yell at you. You got dressed and washed up and left your house, but not before you sent a quick thank you text to Shannon for showing you the messaging app. Yet you had no idea what was in store for you in the future, you’ll just have to wait and see. Who do you think you’ll fall for?

//Mark// //Taeyong// //Yuta// //Doyoung// //Donghyuck// //Sicheng// //Taeil//

//Johnny// //Jaehyun//  

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

Harmonious Color

BTW... Dongho is my man. Look at that smile!

Admin Ummie

Reader X Dongho/Baekho

Genre - Fluff

Word Count - 2,637

Characters - You, Dongho, Jonghyun, Minki, Aron, Minhyun

You’re staying in Jeju, South Korea for school, your school had you go there to learn about the culture and to learn the language. You arrive at your favorite noodle shop and order a big bowl of jjajangmyun and a side dish of rice and carrots. You eat and smile to yourself because of how amazing it tastes. As you’re taking another spoonful of rice, you hear the bell on the restaurant door ring. You look up and see 5 men walk in, they all look beautiful and handsome but one of them catches your eye. He look more handsome than the rest. Muscular and serious, he catches you looking at him. You quickly turn your head back to your food and continue eating. A worker shows the men to the table they’ll be sitting at, it’s pretty close to you but now the man has a clear view of you. As you’re eating one of the men walks over to you, he says “excuse me but do you have any extra soy sauce? I would ask the waitress but they take a long time.” You nod your head lightly and hand it to him. He smiles widely while saying “Thank you so much!” He walks back to the table with a light skip in his step.

Now the handsome man is eating and taking glances at you while doing so. It’s not like you mind since he’s extremely attractive. After a few minutes of sharing looks, you decide to smile at him wondering if he’ll smile back. Thankfully he does and he looks more handsome while smiling. You continue to smile lightly while eating your food, you think to yourself 

will I ever see him again?

You wait for the waitress to bring your credit card back after you pay for your food. You take a piece of paper out of your bag and write your phone number on it, you also write “Girl from restaurant.” You ask the waitress to hand it to him after you leave and she agrees to it. As you leave the restaurant you two share another look while you walk past him and his friends. 

You reach the apartment you’re staying at, thankfully the school is paying for it. You change into a big shirt and some pajama shorts. You get into bed waiting for a message, hoping the waitress actually gave it to him. Shortly after you begin over thinking, you get a message saying “Hi girl from restaurant! Haha my name is Dongho by the way” after you read it, all of the worry you just had goes away and you begin to smile to yourself and respond “haha hi! My name is Y/N. I know it was probably weird when the waitress gave you the paper” After you send that, you say to yourself “Why did I send that? I can’t take it back!” He responds and says “Don’t worry, it wasn’t weird. I should’ve just talked to you when you were there. Sorry!” Your eyes light up and you smile saying “Oh no! Don’t apologize! I was nervous, I’m sorry” 

You two text until 11pm. You end up falling asleep with your phone in your hand. You turn the screen and look at the time “8:45” You plug your phone in and groan while slowly getting up to take a shower. After your shower you arrive at a library. As you enter the library you turn your phone onto vibrate. You pick a book and sit down to read, you feel your phone vibrate through your pocket so you quickly get it. You see that Dongho sent you a message, as you see it you smile. The message says “Good Morning Y/N. How are you?” You reply “Good Morning!! I’m okay, I’m at the library for a little while. How are you?” 

You sit at the library resting and texting on and off for an hour. You go to a café not far from the library and get a French Vanilla coffee. As you leave the café, you see one of the men from last night walk up to you and says “Thanks again for giving us the soy sauce!” You laugh saying “oh! No problem, I’m Y/N” As he shakes your hand he says “my name is Minki! Wait so you’re the girl Dongho was talking about this morning!” You look confused, then another man walks up to Minki and says “Are you ready? Oh, I’m sorry” Minki looks upset and makes a playfully upset face towards him. Minki says “JONGHYUN! I’m in the middle of a conversation with Y/N! She’s the one that gave us the soy sauce last night!” Jonghyun’s eyes light up and he says “Oh! okay, thanks for the soy sauce” You all chuckle and Jonghyun says “wait, your name is Y/N?” You nod your head and he says “your name sounds familiar.” You see Minki nudge Jonghyuns arm, Minki begins to whisper “I think she’s the one Dongho was talking about” You interrupt and say “Um did Dongho talk about me at all?” As Minki is about to talk, a man in a car yells to the men saying “CAN YOU TWO HURRY UP?! WE’RE GOING TO BE LATE!” Minki says “sorry but we have to go, we’re going to see a movie. I’m sorry to leave so sudden” You reply “Oh no it’s alright. Have fun at the movies!” Jonghyun waves to you while saying “Goodbye!” You wave back to them saying bye. 

After they drive off you pull out your phone and send a message to Dongho saying “Hey, I think I just met two of your friends, Minki and Jonghyun” You begin to walk and your phone vibrates. Dongho messages you saying “Really?!Where did you meet them?” You reply “At the café near the library I went to” He replies quickly saying “Can we meet?” As you read the message , your heart beats fast. You reply “Sure..” He replies back quickly again saying “I can meet you at the café! I think I know which one you’re talking about. Stay there, I’ll be there soon!” You walk back inside and sit down towards the window looking outside waiting for him. You get nervous because you don’t really know what to say to him, how to act around him or know what he finds funny. A few minutes later you see someone walking near the café. Your eyes widen as they walk inside. The man looks around for a minute then sees you and walks up to you saying “Y/N HI!” You get up and he pulls you into a tight hug, after pulling away he says “I’ll be right back, I’m going to get a coffee. Do you want anything?" You look back at your coffee and say “no thank you, I still have a lot of coffee left” 

He smiles and says “Okay, I’ll be right back” You sit back down and take a few more sips of your coffee while scrolling on Instagram. Dongho walks back and says “Sorry I took long” You say “You don’t have to worry, you didn’t take long”

You two sit for an hour and a half talking and getting to know each other. Dongho looks outside and sees that its getting dark outside. His eyes widen and he says “it’s getting late.. Should I walk you home?” You look outside and say “You don’t have to. I don’t live far” He stands up and says “Come on, I’ll walk you” 

You both begin to walk and you’re nervous because now he’ll know where you live. As you reach your apartment he says “Oh wow. You really aren’t far” You chuckle and say “Thank you for walking me home. You really didn’t have to” He smiles and says “it was no problem” You say “Let me know when you get home, okay?” He says “I will”

Before he leaves you give him a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek. As you kiss his cheek you can feel it getting warm slowly. You stop and smile saying “Goodnight Dongho. Don’t forget to text me!” He’s pretty much frozen in place and says “o-oh yeah, I will!” 

20 minutes later you get a message from Dongho saying “I’m back! Can we meet again soon?” You read it and smile say “yeah, whenever you’re free!”

A few days go by, you text Dongho sometimes but he’s been busy with his friends. You want to see him again and get coffee again but at the same time you don’t want to seem clingy or obsessive. You wait for him to text you instead of bothering him about it. You keep playing back the moment when you kissed his cheek over and over in your head wondering if your shouldn’t have done that. But you’re pretty glad you did. You also wonder if Dongho talked about you to his friends.

Later on that night you’re in your bed catching up on American Horror Story. As you’re watching it you see your phone screen light up and feel it vibrate. You pause the episode on your laptop and see a message from Dongho saying “Y/N! I’m finally free. Can I take you out for dinner?” You say “Sure, I’ll get dressed :)” You turn your laptop off and run to your closet trying to find the right outfit. The main thing that catches your eyes is a light pink sweater, black high waisted jeans and black heel boots. After you’re ready you tell Dongho that you’re ready.

About 10 minutes later, he arrives at your apartment and gets to the front door. As soon as he sees you, his cheeks turn a light shade of pink and he smiles. He says “You look beautiful” You smile as he says it and you say “thank you, you look handsome.” He says “thank you” You reach his car and he opens the door for you and you get in. As you drive you ask him “When I met Minki and Jonghyun, they made it seem like you talked about me to them” Right after you say that you say to yourself “Great.. said another dumb thing” He chuckles and says “I’m not surprised they said anything. I told them that a pretty girl gave me her number, then they were asking where I met you, what your name was, what you looked like. They ask about you a lot. They were actually excited that they met you. Well my other friends Aron, Minhyun were actually upset” You laugh as he tells you. You say “Was your friend the one that was in the car and yelled for them to hurry up?” He laughs and says “Pretty sure that was Aron” 

You smile and then look out the window. You look back over at him and see his hand is free, you wonder if you should hold it or not. You sit your hand on the side of your seat. He looks at your hand and slowly moves his hand to yours. As he holds your hand, your heart feels like its going to beat out of your chest. He laces his fingers together with yours. As he does so, you blush very hard. As you two reach a red light. 

You have your head down not making eye contact with him. He says “Y/N” You look over at him and get nervous. He asks “are you okay?” He sees your face getting red and lets your hand go. You reply quickly “Oh no, I’m okay” He looks at your with a worried look on his face and says “Are you sure? I’m sorry, you probably didn’t want me to hold your hand.” You look down and say “no that’s not it” 

He continues to drive and you sit in silence for a few minutes until you arrive. You get out and follow behind him. You see his other friends and Minki runs up to you and says “You look sad” You fake a smile and say “No, I’m okay” You look around to see the rest of them inside the restaurant. You ask Minki “Does Dongho get upset a lot?” Minki says “well I haven’t seen him upset.. why?” You look down kicking the rocks underneath your feet and say “He held my hand and I was nervous and then he saw me blushing then he just stopped holding my hand and stopped talking until we got here” Minki looks angry as he hears you talk and says “why is he being mean?” You say “it’s alright, you can go inside.. I’ll be in there in a minute” He says “Okay” and gives you a quick hug then walks in the restaurant. You stand near the entrance waiting to see if he’ll come out or text you. You slowly walk in and see him laughing with his friends.

You know you’re being dramatic but the last relationship you were in, you were hurt physically and mentally. You get scared when people touch you but you get scared trying to tell anyone. You think that if you tell anyone they’ll think you’re being dramatic or tell you that it’s not that serious. 

You call for a cab and get a ride back to your apartment. You throw your bag on the chair closest to the door. You change into a big shirt then crawl into bed. You wait for a message but you also know you wont get one. An hour after you fall asleep, you get a call from an unknown number. You answer it and it’s Minki, as your hear his voice you cry and tell him everything. About why you were scared, why you were nervous. Why you’re quiet a lot. You know you’ve only met him about a week ago but you feel like you can trust him.

After your phone call with Minki you fell asleep waking up to 20 text messages and 5 missed calls. You see that all of them are from Dongho. They say “Where are you?” “Call Me” “why’d you leave?” “Minki told me… I’m sorry” “I didn’t mean to be rude” “can you text me?” “Y/N.. Call me please” Instead of responding you get in the shower. You feel refreshed and drink a cup of hot green tea. You hear a knock on your door and your doorbell ring multiple times. You get up nervously and open the door.

Dongho is standing there sweating, having a hard time breathing. You say “Come inside and sit down” All he does is hug you. You say “Dongho.. um..” He doesn’t say anything. You say, “Can you come inside?” He finally goes inside and sits down. You look at him and say “Dongho.. it’s 10 am. What are you doing here?” He says “I came to see you, you didn’t call or text me back” You look down and say “I’m sorry..” 

He stands up and says “Y/N.. I’m sorry. I shouldn't have gotten weird. I wasn’t mad at you.. When Minki told me I actually got upset. What I am upset about is why you left without telling me” You say “I know I should’ve told you I was leaving. I don’t want you to feel bad.. I am sorry” 

He stands up and walks towards you and hugs you tight. One hand in your hair and one on your back. You hug him back and as you pull away, he has his hands on your face and says “I would never hurt you.. okay? Trust me” You say “Okay” He kisses you and you feel all of the stress from before leaving your body. You don’t want to stop kissing him and you feel happy now that you’re doing so. He says “Now will you be my girlfriend so I can take care of you?” You smile and say “hmm? Yeah I will.”

[lookastarlightnight-blog]

The Promise

[Admin Lyric: For the cheese lovers]

Characters: Reader, Yugyeom, Chaerin (Yugyeom’s friend)

Word Count: 2,217

Genre: Fluff. Light Smut

Warnings: Mentions of sex

You had been waiting 3 hours for your boyfriend of 2 years to come home, you dressed really nicely, made food for the 2 of you, that’s now cold, all you wanted to do was cry. You haven’t seen Yugyeom in weeks and he promised that he’d come home at 11 pm and now it’s 1 in the morning. The candles that we’re once lit are blown out and waxy. You decided that you shouldn’t wait any longer before you start to cry so you told yourself that you’d go to bed after cleaning up. As soon as you were about to clean up, you heard keys jingle and the door open.

“Baby I’m so sorry. Practice was longer then expected and our chor-“ You really didn’t want to hear his excuses so you cut him off. 

“Its fine.” You said sarcastically, “ I’m going to sleep.” As soon as you started to walk away, he grabbed your wrist. “Baby, I know I messed up and I’m sorry. I don’t know how to make it up to you.” 

“I’m sorry? How the hell is that supposed to make me feel any better about the situation?!” At this point you started to get aggravated. 

“Noona, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?” He looked at you with apologetic and pleading filled eyes. “I don’t want you to be mad babe…” He says with sincerity in his voice. 

“Its not like we can do things outside together! As much as you tell me we can, we can’t Yugyeom! I just wish we could still do things like go outside together and-“ He cuts you off by grabbing you and kissing you. It was a sweet, soft kiss, yet passionate and filled with love. 

All you wanted to do a minute ago was tell him how much you hated him right now and how you wanna do things like old times before he was an idol, but all of what you wanted to say is now gone. You soon come to realization that you were running out of oxygen, but you didn’t want his lips to part from yours. You really loved Yugyeom a lot, but he pissed you off sometimes. He eventually pulled away from you and you really wanted his warmth back. 

“Noona, put some shoes on okay?” He looked at you smiling. You were confused but complied and grabbed some shoes and put them on. He grabbed you by your waist and looked at you lovingly. 

“Where does my Y/N want to go today?” He said while he taped his index finger on your nose. You giggled. “I don’t know…isn’t it kind of late?” You didn’t want to stay in the house with him again because you always do, but he’s an idol. You didn’t want him to get in trouble because of your selfishness. You noticed he hesitated for a second, but continued talking. 

“Don’t worry about me getting in trouble babe, I’m willing to risk anything for you to make you happy.” He practically read you like a book, how did he know you were worried? You were shocked though. You didn’t ever think he’d be the one to not care about his job just for you. It made you happy that he always had you on his mind even if it meant getting yelled at by his manager, but you felt kind of guilty too. 

 “I love you Yugyeom.” You smiled at him and he cupped your face with his hands and gave a quick peck on you forehead, the on your nose, then finally your lips. “I love you too noona. Let’s go before it gets late okay?” You nodded.

And with that he grabbed your wrist and ran out of your guys’ apartment dragging you behind him. You soon ended you up at a café not far away from your apartment. You 2 always came here on the days you felt depressed and stressed out. When you both went inside, you saw Yugyeom walk up to a girl sitting down at a table by herself. She immediately stood up and gave him a hug. You tried to convince yourself not to be jealous but it was hard. Who the fuck is she? You kind of just followed behind him but got kind of bored. Plus you were bothered by the fact that Yugyeom had completely forgotten about you. 

“Yu, I’m gonna go to the bathroom okay?” He nodded and told you to be careful. You nodded and went to the bathroom. You hurried up considering the fact that the bathroom was really dirty and it smelled bad. When you got out of the bathroom you overheard the conversation Yugyeom and that girl were talking about. 

“Are you and the girl you came with a thing?” She said nonchalantly and tilted her head. Why the fuck does she want to know if we’re dating, it’s honestly none of her business. “No, she’s just a close friend, nothing more.” He chuckled nervously and looked away from her. 

At hearing this your heart hurt, and this time, it hurt worse then it did a few hours ago. I get he’s a idol, but like he can’t tell his close friends he’s dating me? This is utter bullshit to you and you just wanted to sink into a hole and cry or die even.

“Come on oppa, you can’t fool anyone with that statement. I mean you two look good together, why hide it?” She put her chin in the palm of her hand and smirked at Yugyeom. 

“I guess I can’t hide things from you. But I can’t tell people certain things in my personal life. Her names Y/N and we’ve been dating for 2 years, but we’ve known each other for 5.” He smiled at the thought of you two together. You were takin back buy the sudden confession. You were still mad at the fact that he lied, so you decided to give him the silent treatment until he figured out what’s wrong with you. So you started to walk back over to him.

“Noona, you wanna eat anything or drink anything?” You just shook your head and pointed towards the door, signaling you wanted to leave. “Okay, where did you want to go?” You shrugged your shoulders and looked at the time. It’s almost 2 am.

“Your so cute you know that?” He smiled at you and stood up and gave you a kiss on the cheek

“I’ll see you later Chaerin-ah.” He gave her a hug then grabbed your hand and lead you outside. It only took two minutes for Yugyeom to notice something was wrong because you weren’t talking to him. “Babe, are you okay? You’ve been acting strange since you got out the bathroom.” He looked at you, worry and care in his eyes. You just put your hand up to signal you were fine and you know that Yugyeom wasn’t gonna buy that but you really weren’t in the mood to talk to him. He grabbed you buy your waist and turned you around to face him.

“Come on, I know something is wrong. Did I do it?” At this, you kind of felt bad because you didn’t want him to worry but at the same time, you were still mad. Should I just tell him what’s wrong with me?

“Let’s just go home okay?…” He grabbed your wrist and stopped you from walking any further. He didn’t say anything and just stared at you. He entwined his fingers with yours and walked you back to your apartment. 

As soon as you two arrived at the apartment, he pushed you against the door roughly but not so hard so that he didn’t hurt you. He looked you dead in your eyes, his filled with lots emotions you couldn’t figure out. You swore that if his eyes were weapons, you’d be dead already. That’s when it hit you, did he know why you were mad? How did he find out so easily? Did he know you overheard their conversation? How come he’s not apologizing to you like he usually would? You were in a state of confusion and he made it worse by kissing you. Your lips followed his of course, he knew you were confused, and that’s exactly what he wanted. He knew why you were mad at him but wanted to make you forget about it as soon as possible. So he picked up bridal-style, which caught you off guard, and carried you to your guys’ bedroom. He kicked the door shut and then tossed you on the bed.

“Noona, I know I made you upset and frustrated but I’ll explain it all later, right now, I just want you to forget about everything and focus on me.” Now, his voice was a lot deeper then it was a minute ago. You could see his eyes boring into yours, filled with passion and lust. Yours and Yugyeom’s sex life was nothing new. You noticed that it has indeed changed since he became and idol. All the times he was away and on tour with Got7, made you miss him and him miss you more than you already missed each other. Let’s just say things got really heated when he’d come home from being on tour for days on end. You missed him a lot and agreed to yourself that maybe you’ll feel a lot better after tonight, which you really did if you know what I mean.

You woke up the next morning, laying next to Yugyeom’s naked body, wrapped in his arms. You loved these days where you and him would wake up and eat breakfast together and just cuddle and watch “Goblin” all day. You looked at his sleeping figure and smiled. It’s been a while since you have woke up to him sleeping next to you. It was close to chuseok, so you new he’d be here for awhile which made you happy. You didn’t want to wake him up, he wasn’t a morning person anyway, you loosened his grip around you and put some clothes on and washed up a bit, then went straight to making breakfast. Moments later, you saw your half-asleep boyfriend walk up to you and give you a hug. 

“You know you shouldn’t make coffee in the morning, it wakes me up.” His voice was raspy and you almost squealed at him.

“Put some clothes on silly, and wash up okay?” You couldn’t resist the urge to squeeze his cheeks, so you did. He pushed your hands away and pouted. You laughed and he pouted more.

“Meanie…..” He crossed his arms and walked into the bathroom. You were so caught up in how cute he looked that you almost forgot you were cooking. When you were done making breakfast and fixing the plates, you saw Yugyeom walking into the kitchen, with clothes on this time, in awe. He mouth was wide open and his eyes were big.

“NOONA!!! YOU MADE ALL OF THIS??!!” You could almost see his mouth watering, and you giggled and smiled. “Yup, for my baby.” You waved him over so that he could give you a hug, and he did just that. 

“Thanks Jagi.” 

“No problem Yugyeom-ah.” 

He kissed you and the you both sat down to eat. You enjoyed talking to Yugyeom a lot and you’re really glad that you met him, and that he’s yours. He noticed you staring at him.

“Baby, I’m really sorry about last night, well really this morning. Manager-hyung said that I couldn’t tell people that I was in a relationship, but I didn’t think that I’d hurt you. I should have thought about your feelings more noona.” He looked like a small puppy at that moment and you just sighed because he looked so breath taking. He pouted because you didn’t say anything. 

“Noooonaaaa!!!!~~~” He looked so cute so you decided to do something. You got up from your seat and pulled his chair out, then sat on his lap. You stared at him before saying anything. “Yugyeom-ah, I’ll forgive you, if you promise me.”

He tilted his head, confusion evident in his eyes. “Promise what?” You smiled at him and kissed his forehead. “Promise me that if you get asked by one of your close friends if you have a girlfriend, you tell them you’re with me, okay?” 

You looked at him to see his expression and was happy to see him smiling at you. You loved his smile like a lot, a lot, it made your day. He put his hands on your waist so you don’t fall. 

“I promise jagiya. I love you.” He smiled and looked at you with his loved filled eyes and kissed you. The kiss was as beautiful and sweet as the kisses you’ve had before this moment, even though he did taste like waffles you made for him previously. He was perfect. You knew no one was perfect until you met Yugyeom, and you knew that the word “perfect” was an understatement. He was the only one you wanted and you were glad he wanted you too. You put your fingers though his dark brown locks and smiled. 

“I love you too.”