malakaiii

[malakaiii]

God fucking damn, people WANTING to have alters is simply beyond me. I mean do people not realize that as children we were so fucking traumatized that our brain couldn’t handle it and had nothing else to resort to other than this? This isn’t something you want. This is the result of unimaginable experiences. And there are people out there who fucking WANT to have alters??? That is just the most insensitive thing ever. This isn’t fun, this isn’t cool, this isn’t quirky. This isn’t a choice, this isn’t something we wanted. We have to live every day like this, this disorder affects our every day life. Wanting to have alters is the exact equivalent of wanting to severely break your arm because somebody else did it and you thought it made them look cool. It isn’t okay. That person is in a lot of pain, that person is hurting and will be hurting for a very long time. It’s not okay for you to want that.

[malakaiii]

hey look I know being a system is hard, and some alters can be incredibly angry and negative, hard to control. but that doesn’t change the fact that their actions are still you/your systems responsibility. you can’t just let your alters be assholes to people, fucking harass people without doing anything about it. that’s so unfair and so not right. you can’t use DID as an excuse to act out and expect no consequences. your alters and their actions are your responsibility and you have to deal with it. you have to at LEAST fucking *TRY* to do something about it bruh. i’m not trying to imply that it’s easy to control everybodys actions, because that’s simply not true. but there comes a point where there’s a serious problem, where people on the outside are being hurt because you won’t even attempt to control your alters. and that is NOT okay.

[malakaiii]

Facts.

Anyways systemhood is a symptom of DIDOSDD.

You cannot be a system without having DIDOSDD.

[malakaiii]

Fuck you, endos.

WE

WERE

CHILDREN. 

So traumatized we split apart, our small little minds protected us from horrors you could NEVER imagine. 

Fuck you.

This is not a game. This is not cosplay. You’re NOT welcome here. You’re just more people who ignore, dismiss, and further traumatize abuse survivours.

[malakaiii]

I’m horrified that someday I won’t remember anything someday. I don’t like not remembering huge chunks of my day and huge chunks of my entire life. My lifetime memories are full of holes, it makes me barely feel human. I don’t want to forget everything. I wish that when people talk to me that I could remember what they say. I wish that I didn’t feel like I was just “winging it” when it comes to life. I’m so fucking sick of having to ask my boyfriend the same question every single day because for some reason I just can never remember the answer. I feel like I’m missing out on the true human experience, and there’s not a thing I can do about it.

[malakaiii]

Casually sitting here severely dissociated not knowing who the fuck I am whilst listening to “my money don’t jiggle jiggle, it folds” 😎 what a day to be alive

[malakaiii]

Welcome to the space age, ladies and gentlemen

[malakaiii]

daily reminder that you’re valid, non traumagenic systems don’t exist, you’re loved, and you deserve happiness :)

[malakaiii]

well said.

Think about it this way: If someone claims to have a shattered leg bone but says they never broke their leg, they're either mixing up symptoms and are dealing with something that isn't a broken leg or don't remember the thing that broke their leg. Legs don't just spontaneously break, there has to be pressure, there has to be something to break it. you can't have a broken leg without breaking your leg, and you can't have alters without the trauma that causes them.

[malakaiii]

and possibly multiple people living in your head rent free

what doesn't kill you gives you a lot of unhealthy coping mechanisms and a really dark sense of humor.

[malakaiii]

@ all anti endo blogs, weather ur blog is about being anti endo or about something compeltly different, I love you and u make me so happy bc ur creating a safe space for systems!!!!

Also this is ABSOLUTELY an opportunity to reblog this with ur anti endo blog weather its a sys blog, a shit post blog, a meme blog, a coining blog, or anything else!!!!! I wanna see all ur blogs!!!!!

[malakaiii]

i’m tired of the misinformation being spread online.

the truth? DID is not performative. it is largely internal. switches usually are not super dramatic, alters do not have to think and act drastically different from each other in order to be separate alters, and not every alter needs to have a 100% consistent pattern of behavior. co-fronting and co-conning is common, lines are blurred, it’s not as black and white as the little people in your phone make it out to be. it is not always obvious when someone has DID & it is not always obvious when a switch has happened. lots of systems are designed to be covert for protective reasons. alters can impersonate the host. alters can have similar voices. lots of systems use i/me pronouns by default. masking is a real thing. DID absolutely is a spectrum and every system is different. a covert expression of symptoms is valid and acceptable and even normal. you don’t need to be aware of every one of your alters, it’s ok to confuse different alters and not always interpret things perfectly, not everyone has a headspace or functional communication with the rest of their system. alters may have varying levels of understanding of their system. it is not all cut and dry. you don’t have to know everything about your system, you don’t need to be super attuned to your inner world. it isn’t always like that.

when you pretend to have DID and create a caricature of it based on the most publicized symptoms, you are harming a very vulnerable group of people with a very highly stigmatized disorder. just stop.

[malakaiii]

[Text: This user does not want to interact with ANY non-traumagenic system.]

Like/Reblog if you save or use!

[malakaiii]

The Calamity System Info

• traumagenic system (because that’s the only type of system that exists)

• they/them collectively

• polyfrag, stopped counting alters a long time ago, but the last count was over 50 (and we know there’s many more)

• omnisexual, aceflux, and agender

• body is 19

DNI

If you’re a non traumagenic system of any type, or you support any kind of non traumagenic system, or you believe that they exist

If you’re r-cist, s-xist, h-mophobic, tr-nsphobic, lgbtq+ exclusionist, p-do, or any other kind of disgusting asshole

If you don’t support xenopronouns or neopronouns

If you’re under 16 don’t follow or interact at all please

If you post any kind of detailed NSFW stuff

[malakaiii]

Common DID Myths :)

#1 DID Is Rare: This is simply not true, recent studies and statistics point to the fact that DID is present in over 1% of the population.

#2 The Cause Is Unknown: This is very incorrect. Any professional who knows what they’re talking about will tell you that DID is caused by trauma. I’ve seen some professionals make very good points regarding this. Although the criteria in the DSM 5 doesn’t say that trauma is required for diagnosis, it does say that amnesia is required. There are different types of amnesia, and the amnesia that is described in the criteria for DID matches up with the symptoms of “dissociative amnesia”. Dissociative amnesia is caused byyy… you guessed it, trauma. The DSM 5 lists “the inability to recall traumatic events” as a criteria for DA. If DID requires DA, and DA requires trauma… obviously, DID requires trauma. (I’m not a professional by the way, this is information that I’ve gathered from multiple sources, including people who *are* professionals, and people who are in college for psychology.)

#3 DID Switches Are Always Obvious: This is a myth. DID is a “covert” disorder, meaning it’s not supposed to be recognizable. Not by people on the outside, and especially not by the person themself. This is why quite a few people who are professionally diagnosed, don’t get diagnosed until they’re in their late 20s or so. Because you’re not supposed to know that you have this disorder, switching will most likely not be obvious for a lot of people.

#4 DID Isn’t Real: This is literally one of the stupidest things I have ever heard of. If it isn’t real, then it wouldn’t be in a 1,000 page book made by a team of over 150 professionals that took around 8 years to make.

#5 DID Is A Personality Disorder: This is a common mistake, understandably so. DID is often referred to as Multiple Personality Disorder, and that used to be the actual medical term for it. But it is not a personality disorder, although those do very much exist (and there’s quite a lot of them). DID is a dissociative disorder.

#6 People With DID Are Dangerous: This is very untrue. Due to stigma and negative representation, some people think that people with DID are evil, m-rderous, heartless, etc. People with DID are actually no more dangerous than any other human. There’s evidence that people with DID are more common to be a victim (again) rather than be the ones to hurt somebody else.

#7 DID Can Develop At Any Age: Incorrect. DID only develops in early childhood, around anywhere from being born, up to possibly 9 years old. Although the exact age can’t be determined, many professionals will say numbers such as toddler-6, or 6-9, 0-6, and etc. But the general consensus is that DID won’t develop over the age of 9.

[malakaiii]

This is so well said, and something that I experience often

Reminder that it doesn't mean your faking when your system goes "dark" or "shuts down" (ex: zero communication, can't notice switches, no grasp on what's going on around front or internally), it's (sadly) normal, and yes you're still valid even if it stretches on for months. DID is a covert disorder, you're not supposed to know you have it, so of course it's going to retaliate and build higher/thicker dissociative barriers when you start poking around. It's just trying to protect you, even if it's got a few things wrong, so please be gentle with yourself, it won't always be this hard

[malakaiii]

IMPORTANT FOR SYSTEMS!!!

tw/cw ahead: ableism, fakeclaiming, and harassment of systems

hey fellow systems of tumblr.

as some might be aware there are safe spaces on discord for systems, and recently people from the r/fakedisordercringe subreddit have created a fake safe space to lure in systems for the purpose of mocking and harassing them. the server is called System City with a fancy font (𝕊𝕪𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕞 ℂ𝕚𝕥𝕪).

PLEASE share this, so no systems fall for this trap and get harrassed.

[image ID: a screenshot taken from a TikTok video, which in turn is a screenshot of the r/fake disorder cringe subreddit. the reddit post provides a screenshot of the fake discord server. the caption reads: my friend and I are going undercover as DID fakers, we made a server to specifically invite people we know are faking DID (like those with 200 plus alters that are all fictives.) We're just baiting them to join so we can laugh at them lol- end of ID.]