marauders-shit - Tumblr blog

[marauders-shit]

Regulus Black died alone in a cave.

Surrounded by reanimated corpses

at 19 years old just so that

Voldemort would meet his demise

Regulus Black was 19 years old. No

one asked him to go looking for the

Horcrux

He was the unknown hero

And worst of all Sirius Black died

thinking his brother was a coward

And everyone says that Snape was

the Slytherin Hero

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Sirius: My name is Sirius

Sirius: But you can call me

Sirius: *aggressively puts on sun glasses*

Sirius: Anytime

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Regulus: I AM LOST FOR WORDS

Sirius narrating: despite being lost for words, Regulus yelled at us for the next ten minutes.

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James: Do you want to play a games?

Lily: Uh... sure.

James: It’s called Remus or motorbike.

James: I will give you accurate quotes I heard Sirius saying, and you’ll have to guess if he’s talking to his motorbike or to his boyfriend.

Lily: ...

Lily: AWESOME

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Sirius: It’s not gay if I want to date Remus, but like bros right?

Andromeda: I’m not an expert, but that sounds kind of gay.

Regulus [eating chips]: I’m an expert. That’s gay.

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James: WE WERE STUDYING!!

McGonagall: You put on the suits of armor from the third floor corridor, and rode your broomsticks down the hall directly into each other and shouted CHARGE.

Sirius: IT WAS MUGGLESTUDIES, WE WERE RECREATING AN OLD FASHIONED MUGGLE DUEL

.......Later in detention........

Sirius as he scrubs the floor with toothbrush: Why do we even have so many suits of armor if we can’t joust?!

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Sirius: Eww, get your diseased rear off my bed.

Peter: Disseased?! I’m not diseased.

Sirius: Look up “Black Plague” in the library.

Peter: Why would I look up you family tree?

Sirius:

Peter:

Sirius: Touché

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Lmaoo

Orion: I love my family... Walburga, Cygnus, Regulus, Cedrella, Bellatrix, Narcissa...

Orion:

Orion: Bellatrix, Narcissa...

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James: *Writing a poem for Lily during Transfiguration class*

James: What in Merlin’s name rhymes with Lily

James: Does it count if I rhyme “Lily” with “Lily flower”?

McGonagall: Please pay attention Mr Potter. And no, it doesn’t count

James: Thank you professor

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James, wearing an apron and a towel over his shoulder: Moony!

Sirius also wearing an apron: Moony you’re home!

Remus: What-

James, wiping down the kitchen counter: Honey, I cleaned the house for you!

Sirius: I made dinner doll!

James: We missed you!

Sirius: Welcome home!

Remus: Guys, please

Remus: This is Ikea. We’re going to get kicked out

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SIRIUS FLIRTING WITH LITERALLY EVERY TEACHER TRYING (and failing) TO GET OUT OF DETENTION

He tried it with Dumbledore once and the man laughed so hard it almost worked, but then McGonagall came around the corner. Sirius brags until his dying day that he once seduced Dumbledore himself.

James never actually believes him until one day Sirius gives Dumbledore a dramatic wink and then Dumbledore winks back.

James stands up and walks out of the Great Hall.

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Looks like they could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll: Sirius Black

Looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you: Remus Lupin

Looks like a cinnamon roll and is actually a cinnamon roll: James Potter

Looks like they could kill you and could actually kill you: Lily Evans

Dies because they ate too many cinnamon rolls: Peter Pettigrew

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Going to breakfast

James: Wherewolf?

Sirius: *Looks around*

Sirius: *Points at Remus*

Sirius: Therewolf

Remus:

James & Sirius: *Giggles*

Remus: I will kill you both