multch

[multch]

so uh…is anyone gonna write anymore Spock fics?? I kinda read them all.

[multch]

I wonder if there are any Vulcans that have a "human kink"

Like humans are basically the complete opposite so its looked down upon to be with a human but I wonder if certain Vulcans are turned on by it...

Imagine your Vulcan boyfriend having to go home to tell his parents that he's dating a human and plans to marry you. His parents are completely shocked and can't believe that they have raised their son to be with a human.

Or maybe there are certain Vulcans that just find the smaller demeanor of human women attractive, the average Vulcan height is 6'6 so possibly they like the vulnerability of humans

Vulcan x human is literally my favorite trope idc

[multch]

calm down guys, it's only the 8th

[multch]

and just when you think you’re at your absolute lowest a blonde motherfucker comes along and makes everything so much worse

[multch]

Kicking, screaming, punching the air over realising I'm going to have to actually write a fic for a character because (not even hyperbole) they only have one fic on this God forsaken platform.

[multch]

I know this is sooooo late but I did this when this template was still popular so here's my comfort characters in a car together lol

[multch]

it's all about my love hate relationship with saw v

[multch]

Saw lesbian +30 hp

Saw lesbian +30 hp

Saw Trans girl +30 hp

Saw aroace flag +30 hp

Saw drag show +100 hp

[multch]

I would never slut shame, I only slut encourage

[multch]

See how I hide my fanfic below a cut off? Very cutesy, very demure. I'm not posting a 5k word smuttfic that you have to spend 5 minutes scrolling past on your feed...

[multch]

Caught.

Art the clown x Reader [18+]

CW: Smut\ afab Reader

Pt.1 (Thoughts)

Art just caught you red-handed pleasuring yourself but he doesn't seem to react… at first.

There stood Art the clown, leaning up against the wall with a shit eating grin- Oh God no.

Oh God no.

It was in this moment, you felt as small as a starved mouse. Has he always towered over you?

Holding your breath, your gaze hesitantly lifted to meet with his eyes.

Surely he couldn’t hear you in there… And obviously he couldn’t have been waiting outside the whole time.. right?

But what if he had. Would he be disgusted? His face contorted into a disturbed grimace. Could it change your relationship? Would he be so enraged as to consider you his next victim- ready to skin you with his bare hands. Gosh why did you ever think that was a good idea! 

Your lust was your hamartia- the trigger that would spiral into your gruesome demise; a death without an ounce of dignity.

It was as if that doorway was a picture frame holding- you- a moment frozen in time. Your face was flushed bright red and your chest heaved up and down as if you had just ran a marathon. 

Your eyes were wide in shock and pure terror.

As your gaze met his, you couldn’t help but sigh as he walked right past you. How could he be so calm? His smirk dropped as he practically shrugged you off as if you were translucent- as if you weren’t there…

What the hell?!

*

There it layed unfinished. It would only take you a few minutes to stitch back up the final rip.

Across your desk were numerous tools you used throughout the night; The jacket you worked on mere hours ago, several pairs of sharp fabric scissors and an array of pins and needles strung with thread.

Despite the busy crowd of your work-station, you remained alone. 

Where could he be?

*

You looked up at the cheap clock sitting on the wall; 2:15am.

Clutched carefully in your hand, you carried his newly repaired costume with you. When you would return it to him, you would finally be able to go home- that is if you could find him…

It was your 4th time circling around the store and only one thought remained in your mind; 

Where on earth was that damn clown!?

Walking into storage, you were met with the familiar dark and dusty sight you dreaded seeing so often. Luckily, since meeting Art, you were able to evade stock retrieval long enough during your shifts to delegate it to him at night. Unfortunately, every once in a while you would still have to venture out back during the day when issues were too urgent. 

It wasn't rare for liminal spaces to creep you out so the avoidance was understood with a few simple honks of a horn. 

“Hey Art… you in here?” You shivered.

The room was cramped and lined with unstable wire shelving overflowing with cardboard boxes of various sizes. As there were no windows, who knew what could be hiding in the shadows. 

As your eyes adjusted to make out shapes within the darkness, your hand crept around the wall beside you for a light switch.

Aha! There it was.

As you went to flick the switch your heart suddenly dropped.

That’s not the switch… 

Two cold hands grabbed your arm in an instant, pulling you towards a firm chest.

Shit!

“Art! Oh my goodness I am so sorry,” you blurted, “I was just looking for the lightswitch, I didn’t mean to-” 

While what you could see was limited, what you knew was abundant. Your cheeks burned up as you realized what you just did. You didn’t flick the lightswitch, you just hit Art’s nipple- god that’s so embarrassing! You practically screamed at yourself.

What did you drag yourself into! First you think he caught you finger fucking yourself to the thought of him. Now you're in a dark storage cupboard and he's completely naked! 

It's not even his fault, you sighed. You're the one carrying his repaired clothes- Damn it! You should've given him something to wear- you work in a costume shop for christ’s sake!

There, you continued to ramble on and on. Uttering something about an extra Santa costume. Suddenly, you gasped as Art pulled you closer towards himself.

Oh.

Seems like Art noticed your distraction and gave you something else to think about. Yes, he was naked but that didn't interest you when you knew you could lean into the tenderness of his sharp touch.

It ran through you- that burning, stinging sensation everywhere his skin touched yours. He was frozen. He kept pulling you closer into his chest like he needed you to survive. Like your warmth was addictive.

His arms wrapped around you like a snake while he tucked your legs between his thighs.

You looked up at him only to be met with the same shit-eating grin as last time.

What a pervert.

He was infectious. Once you had laid eyes on those disgusting tar black teeth and dark doe eyes, it was as if a command came over your soul. The corners of your lips unconsciously lifted into a smile. Maybe you would take advantage of this proximity for once…

Laying a quick peck on his bottom lip, you chuckled as you knew his facepaint had transferred to your own.

Art always knew how to make you laugh as he reared back to make an exaggerated shocked face. Quickly, he returned the offer by giving you a toothy grin before smashing his lips into yours.

Driving your bodies forward and away from the initial wall, Art bites your bottom lip as a plea for entry. Your back arches against the shelving as he pushes into the kiss. You let him- loving each and every second of pure bliss. 

His tongue explored every inch, every tooth, every surface. It felt like you two stayed like that for eternity. It was as if once you would open your eyes, the night would be long gone.

You winced when you were forced to pull yourself away- heaving large gasps for air. 

You couldn’t believe it. First thing you’re working a simple 9-5 and next thing you know you’re making out with the most infamous murderer in all of New York. The thought was enough to send a surge of energy rising through you.

But is this all? It’s been 3 whole years where you’ve spent countless nights fantasizing about and being subject to his mindless antics. 3 whole years. 

You swallow the lump in your throat as you turn back to Art, placing your palm against his hollow cheek. 

Whatever, you were happy to finally show your devotion to him at last…

As your lips hover over his, you gaze into his eyes. Pitch black with not a soul in sight, yet a carefulness he held while looking back at you. Back at you until… 

You felt a strange sensation graze against your thigh.

It was in the moment you learnt it was possible for the white clown to turn a subtle shade of pink. 

His eyes dodged down as he seemed to shuffle slightly further away. Choosing to hide in the shadows again, Art took a couple hefty steps backwards until all you could make out was the outline of his prominent features within the shadows.

“Oh shit..” you uttered under your breath. Art was hard. Oh my goodness, Art was hard and embarrassed. 

Weighing up the pros and cons, you quickly bit the bullet and made up your mind. You were going to take that risk even if it could cost you your life. Art was everything you wanted and more. He had been so helpful over the past few years, you thought he deserved a small favor in return.

Stepping across the small storage room, you land in front of him- placing your hands on his chest. His skin was frigid and without a pulse.

“I can help you with that,” you whisper into his ear.

Despite the quick shocked expression Art played with, it was as if you caught his sincerity for a second before he snaped back into miming an over-emphasized swooning motion; fanning himself with his hand before pretending to faint.

His eyes stare far into yours as if seeking reassurance before acting on his own accord.

You nodded. Falling to your knees, you steadied yourself with both hands holding onto his legs. 

There it was. 

While you had seen it plenty of times, you had never imagined it from this angle. It was ample in length and wide in thickness. The sight was enough to make your mouth water.

You carefully grip the base and work your hands up and down his shaft before placing it in your mouth.

Paying attention to every ridge and bump, you slide your tongue across his length. As you begin bobbing your head back and forth, you look up to find Art’s embarrassment is long gone.

His eyes are shut tight and his mouth gapes open like he's lost for words. (if he had any, that is)

While you pulled closer and closer towards the base of his cock with every thrust, Art put his hands on the crown of your head, pulling you further into him.

Sliding down your throat, you gagged as Art thrusted his shaft into the roof of your mouth. 

For someone so shy before, he’s taking control of this alot more than you expected..

Drool pools at the corners of your mouth, dribbling slowly down your chin. Art takes notice and drags his hand down to wipe it with his shaky thumb.

Fuck- he was so far down the back of your throat, you swore it was a miracle you were till breathing by now.

Thick white ropes coated the walls of your mouth. The action sent you bucking back as it forced you into a coughing fit. God was he bitter tasting.

He flung back before patting your head. It felt degrading- almost as if you were his pet in need of praise after completing a trick.

Lifting your gaze to look up at him, he sends back a dramatic shocked face before shifting to his usual wide grin.

As you stuck your tongue out, you chuckled before swallowing his seed.

*

Zipp! And that was the last of it. All that was left was to lock up the store and you were done. Your desk was cleaned, your repairs were finished and your clown friend was very happy. 

While you loved your job, you were terribly excited to finally go home and have a long rest (maybe even a sweet treat too)

You let out a chuckle as you watched the live footage displayed on the security cameras. Despite being colorless and grainy, the expression on Art’s face was clear as day. There, he waved into the camera- his face imitating the pure joy of a small child* in a candy store; with a large smile and immense energy radiating from him.

(*As pure as he can get considering he’s a murderous hell spawn, but we won’t talk about that…)

He tipped his tiny top hat towards the camera, then swiftly turned on his heels to face the exit.

Ding! Ding! Ding! The bell rang out as Art made his exit, and it was as if he had suddenly vanished.

You couldn’t wait for tomorrow… 

Maybe work could be a bit more exciting from now on, you thought.

[multch]

Not Art calling us outtt- I'm dead 😭

Reddit just had an AMA for Art the Clown (with DHT providing answers), and I plucked out a few of my favorites. I managed to get two questions out of him (the zodiac question and about his bachelor status) answered before he had to skeedaddle.

[multch]

For anyone lurking across my page, I've decided to make a short cut to all of my writing- This list is subject to change and update in the future as I continue to upload fiction.

Unorganised mess but fuck it we ball

MASTER LIST:

Accident. No outbreak! Joel Miller x Reader🌶 [18+]

Thoughts. Art the clown x reader 🔥 [18+]

Caught. Art the clown x reader 🔥 [18+] (Thoughts pt2 )

Noted. Bill Cypher (human) x Sanford Pines 🔥 [18+]

Pig Mask. Mark Hoffman x Reader 🌶 [18+]

April Fools gone wrong. Maurice Moss x Reader🌸 (Coming soon)

Other:

Art the Clown head cannons. + Art the clown x reader HCs [18+]

[multch]

Art the Clown head cannons.

Art has no definition of cleanliness. He gives off racoon vibes where he'll live in absolute trash yet still do his laundry regularly.

Favorite holiday is Black Friday. He finds amusement in seeing people rip each other apart for sales. (He also participates in the violent holiday as he has very little spare change to spend on snacks)

Since he's immortal, I imagine he has picked up a few languages over the years- Russian, Dutch, etc, etc..

Art doesn't need to eat but regardless, he loves to. He tried sugar cookies once and killed 4 people that day from the sugar rush he felt (super festive…)

Definitely drinks Alcohol often but never takes drugs since he has no idea how a stimulant might affect his occult powers.

During the festive season, Art drinks almost exclusively eggnog, whereas, usually he drinks cases of cheap beer before going out on murderous killing sprees.

Art is crazy about Christmas- If Halloween didn’t give him a great disguise, he would go around dressed like Santa all year round. (Unfortunately going around commando all the time makes being a Mall-Santa quite conflicting..)

NSFW BELOW CUT OFF [18+]

Art is 100% into torture porn and doesn't refrain from using violence on the person he loves to get himself off.

If his partner has boundaries against kinks like knife play or blood, Art settles for small bites instead.

He loves leaving his mark on you.

If he's allowed to hurt you, he will. He loves creating small cuts along your thighs and smearing little hearts out of the blood that spills out of your wounds.

If you're a romantic partner (maybe even a partner in crime…) he shapes both your sexual and romantic experiences to your preferences. He doesn't care- but if you do, he would do anything to make it a reality. Even if it is a bit unorthodox…

He definitely DIY’d sex toys to use on you and they definitely broke. 

Art's the type of guy to pull up with a dildo duct taped to a drill that's still covered in blood from the last time he drilled it into someone's skull and still give you that cheeky grin like its attractive.

[multch]

Agatha Harkness x Reader.

[multch]

Just a PSA to anybody writing fic about Joel Miller, this is what his bed looks like.

Thank you for your time.

[multch]

I don't think I can fix her, but maybe if we fucked a few times it might help calm her down