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[nomamah]

WWDitS spoiler alert

Is it just me or is something off about new what we do in the shadows episodes? I feel like the show just got a lot meaner and deprecating to its main casts, don't get me wrong it was always part of the show but now I feel like it was the central part of 1st and 2nd episode. And Guillermo's transformation feels like smaller status quo change than previous seasons. I rewatched some older episodes recently and they felt diffrent

[nomamah]

Damn I wasn't active for a long time, not sure if anyone cares about my silly thoughts but I'm back. Hyped for new season of dragon prince and gay vampires ans determined to win with intrusive thoughts telling me no one cares about my blabbering, so what o can still spam it's my profile not my mental illnesses (I guess we could share if it ask nicely)

[nomamah]

I started reading Wizard of the Earthsea today and boy o boy it was magical experience. I felt like I reconnected with book loving 8yo who I thought died inside me because I had a hard time bringing myself to read for past few years. After years of mainly ebooks i gotta say having bought myself almost 1k pages thick brick that smells absolutely amazing is nice. I'm still gonna stick with ebooks mainly but I'm thinking of starting buying myself every few months some big book

[nomamah]

So I'm lieing in bed cudling with my homie and I sent photo of us to his girlfriend and apparently he told her we were dating for a year when we were roommates and now I'm like o kurwa, i didn't see it this way. Should I ask him out?

[nomamah]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but if the phrase "self care" doesn't resonate with you, try calling it "system maintenance" and see if that clicks.

[nomamah]

“People are allowed to dislike things” WRONG! No one is allowed to dislike Rayla

[nomamah]

Reagan Ridley being the smartest person in the whole world still not figuring how to have a successful career AND a healthy relationship with the man of her dreams feels so wrong ...

[nomamah]

Finished nurgling plushie for a friend, it looks like mutated tadpole but plague father loves all his children

[nomamah]

IF YOU ARE READING THIS: CONGRATULATIONS! YOU MADE IT THIS FAR AND I AM PROUD OF YOU.

[nomamah]

[nomamah]

This is so adorable but i hate my brain because when Callum told Bait that Stella is just a baby it made me think how long do glowtoads live, and now I hope they have really long life spans because even a thought of Ezrans grieving Bait hurts me

Little Moments 1.0

She thinks he’s talking to himself at first, which isn’t unusual for him.

Or rather it wasn’t.

He used to mutter to himself while drawing or reading his big dusty books and she’d find herself sitting and watching him, laughing quietly if he got particularly animated.

And so she thinks it’s sweet he’s kept this endearing trait after two years, but then it turns out he’s actually talking to Bait and Stella.

Which is somehow sweeter and more endearing.

She hangs back in the hallway, peering around the corner as he chats to the two creatures. They are both perched on the camp kitchen table and it looks like he’s cutting up fruit for them. Janai has found a little pavilion for them to congregate in for the few days they will be staying at the Sunfire camp.

“Bait!” He whines when the glow toad slurps a piece of some bright pink fruit. “Seriously! Let me finish. I’m hungry too, you know?”

Bait croaks grumpily, pouting in an exaggerated fashion.

Stella takes advantage of Callum’s distraction, darting forward and snagging half a of large berry. She gives herself up with her happy chittering though and Callum turns to find her nibbling happily.

“Oi!” He puts his hands on his hips and looks at her pointedly. “You’re new, you know? I haven’t made up my mind about you yet and this thievery isn’t doing you any favours.”

Stella looks up at him with her big, sad eyes pondering for a moment and then offers him the remains of the half eaten berry.

“I don’t want that!” Callum turns up his lip, snorting. “I want you both to wait two minutes while I finish cutting this up. Can you do that? Can you do that for me please?!”

Stella looks at Bait and they seem to have a silent conversation before Bait huffs and groans and Stella plops onto her little bum. Simultaneously, they sigh, seeming to signal they will give him a moment to finish preparing the assorted fruits.

“Thank you.” Callum sighs, shaking his head as he goes back to cutting up fruit. “Now, I don’t really know what most of this is, but we’re just going to have to be adventurous, okay?” He looks between his companions. “Give everything a try and not just wolf down the sun melons… I’m looking at you, Bait.”

Bait grumbles, covering his eyes with his scaly front legs.

Callum snorts, and continues cutting. He plops the last of the fruit into a bowl and looks back at the animals. “Done!” He smiles brightly. “You guys are going to help me clean up, right?”

Stella twitters, jumping up and leaping onto his shoulder. Callum picks up the bowl and she grabs him around the neck with her tail, leaning forward to swipe at the pile of fruit.

“No! Stop!” Callum tries to shrug her off. “I’m not done done. Let me at least sit down!”

Stella ignores him, her little hands grabbing fruit and stuffing it into her face.

Seeing her lose her resolve spurs Bait into slow action. Grumbling a battle charge, he leaps from the table and begins pawing at Callum’s leg as Callum tries to fend Stella off and make his way to the chairs.

“Oi!” He hops around Bait, clutching the bowl. “Stop ganging up on me! Traitors! I didn’t even want to share this with you!”

Stella drops a large berry and before she can react, Bait catches it with his long tongue. She screeches loudly, dropping from Callum’s shoulder and landing on Bait’s head. Using all four of her arms, she attempts to pry his mouth open and retrieve her berry.

“Stella, no!” Callum drops to his knees, gently holding her back. “Here.” He holds out a large berry for her and she pouts for a moment before taking it. Seeing her appeased, Callum looks at Bait. “And you!” He narrows his eyes dramatically at Bait who looks away. “Don’t you tease her. She’s only a baby.”

Bait grumbles, eyes moving between Callum and Stella before he rolls his eyes and shrugs.

“Thanks Bait.” Callum grabs a large piece of sun melon and presents it to the little glow toad.

Bait’s eyes sparkle for a moment before he grabs the melon with his long tongue.

“Ew, gross.”

Callum sighs and it’s all too much. Rayla can no longer contain her giggles.

Jumping a little, Callum looks over his shoulder, blushing brightly to find her watching him. “Eh, hi.” He gets to his feet, still clutching the bowl. “You, em, been there long?”

“Long enough.” She hangs back in the pavilion entrance, waiting to gauge his reaction to her. “You doing okay there?”

“Well, I’m managing.” He smiles a little, looking between Stella and Bait. “It used to be hard enough stopping Bait stealing my lunch.”

She laughs softly. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

They wait in an awkward silence for a moment and she wonders if she should leave him to it.

“Em, you hungry?” He awkwardly holds the bowl out to her. “I’m not sure how much there will be but…” He nods at the fruit. “If you’re hungry…?”

They eat a pleasant lunch together, still that distance between them but less than yesterday and that less than the day before.

And he smiles at Stella as she begins to fall asleep, tummy full and looking content. Bait is napping in her lap and perhaps they don’t have to sit in silence to let the animals sleep but they do and for once it’s not awkward. It’s pleasant.

And when she looks at him and hazards a small smile… well, he smiles back.

Also on AO3: Little Moments

[nomamah]

History demands nothing!  I make history, it does not make me. Our past is behind us, and I will build a brighter future for our people than you can possibly imagine.

*looks at Amaya* And it will be beautiful.

Can I aplaud the writers for this dialog pls. 

What a powerful quote.

[nomamah]

I am seeing some of the WORST takes about tdp season 4. Sweet, sweet tumblr users. This season was a lot of set up, not everything was supposed to be explained or resolved, or even "should" have been. Season 4 had to do the heavy leg work of re-establishing characters and arcs and the plot moving foreword. It just needs a little time to be able to act on everything it's now established. It did a good job building off of arc 1, and now we are fully indoctrinated into arc 2!

[nomamah]

Really enjoyed these two in the new season c: Can’t wait for season 5!

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[nomamah]

I don't know about it. I actually like how they delt with Raylum this season. I love this ship so much and it hurts me to see them unhappy but I think just making Callum lash out at her and then talk it over would be cheap and fanservice. He clearly doesn't know how to feel and there also is stuff with aaravos taking control over him so it's natural that during those few days he only warmed up a little. Personally I think if Callum was to act on anger it would be bad decision, similar to Harrow acting on his grief and deciding to act vengeance.

And while Callum needs to figure his emotions out Rayla has to deal with Mission over love. Same stuff Runnan and her parents had. For her it's natural that duty comes first so I don't blame her that she acts like she doesn't know she did something wrong. She will figure it out especially since she got all the coins.

And the whole Viren scene i think makes perfect sense. Callum is still somewhat cold but also he trusts her to be capable and he can't just leave Ezran, i love Soren but still Rayla is a lot more capable on her own.

And when Callum realizes that rayla might died he finally accepts that he still cares about her so much and I think this is the start of them moving on.

The whole theme of the show is not repeating mistakes and letting go. In my opinion it reflects on their issues too, Callum needs to let go of his anger and Rayla has harder task of acknowledging that her leaving did hurt him and unpacking this whole stuff with her parents and Runnan because I'm not sure if she really has dealt with that and expect some big scene for her.

The Problem with Rayllum

Here is my promised salt post about my issues with how Callum and Rayla's relationship and individual characters were written in season 4. I know a lot of people really enjoyed the season, so please feel free to skip. I have no idea how long this is going to be since I intend to ramble until I've gotten all the Big Feelings off my chest. I still love the show (arc 1 will always be one of my favorite stories), and I adore these two and their precious relationship... it's one of my top two OTPs of all time. I want to see them happy, but I also want their characters done justice.

First off, a lot of my issues could potentially be resolved by what happens in season 5 onward, and I truly hope this is what happens. I want to be able to look back on season 4 and see it as part of the whole picture, even if I seriously doubt it will ever be one of my favorite seasons (right now it's for sure my least favorite). I went in with a lot of hope and faith in the writers, and I'm going to be watching season 5 with a lot more caution.

For starters, Callum. This sweet boy was dealt a devastating blow that fundamentally changed him as a person, but 4x01 makes it abundantly clear that he's still deeply in love with Rayla, to the point that he can't even be happy on his own birthday because of how achingly he misses her. When she abruptly reappears in his life, his reaction is realistic. He's cold and distant and makes it clear he does not want to talk to her. If anything, he seems annoyed that she showed up. But as he says later on, the two emotions he immediately felt were happiness and anger. We see the former at the very end of the finale, but basically none of the latter. Instead, he spends the entire season icing Rayla out, turning down her multiple attempts at getting him to talk with her. And I can't help but wonder why. Does he not want to get angry at her? Because boy, he needs to. He has EVERY RIGHT to be furious with her, for leaving him behind and never letting him know she was okay and then randomly popping up in his study in the middle of the night without so much as an apology (more on that later). This is what I expected and hoped for going into season 4... that he would snip at her for a while, leading up to a confrontation where all the Big Feelings come out. He needs to let himself be angry, to shout and scream and let out two whole years of hurt, because I'm not convinced Rayla understands just how deeply she wounded him. But instead, he just seemed... indifferent, if not mildly irritated by her, ignoring her flirtacious remarks (or icily shutting them down) and turning away her efforts at a conversation.

Speaking of Rayla... GIRL WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN AND WHY DID YOU JUST NOW DECIDE TO COME BACK!?!?! I'm honestly flabbergasted by how they approached Rayla this season. Through the Moon and "Dear Callum" were such lovingly crafted looks into her psyche, and all that just fell flat on its face. I still really loved seeing her this season, but they did not address the fallout of her decision at all, and she seemed more or less unchanged by it. In "Dear Callum," she expresses her belief that she very likely may not come back, and despite how desperately she longs to stay, she cannot return until she knows for certain that Viren is dead and therefore Callum is safe (that's another issue... she says she was after "revenge," but TTM and "Dear Callum" show that her main motivation was protecting Callum). But she never found Viren, or any proof of his demise. So why come back? Why go two whole years and then randomly decide to give up? The first words out of Callum's mouth after her name are, "Why are you here?" She offers no explanation beyond, "I came back." Girl why? What happened? Why did you change your mind, when your self-appointed mission isn't complete? Especially when, as far as I can tell, she doesn't understand that what she did was wrong. That's why, despite acknowledging that her leaving was painful for Callum, she doesn't apologize. Because in her mind, there's nothing to apologize for. She did it because she loves Callum, therefore it's right. But then again, why apologize to Ezran and not to Callum?

That's another reason I think Callum needs to fully express his anger at Rayla, not only for his own healing but to show Rayla how wrong she was, that he may be safe physically, but his heart has been shattered beyond repair. That he's no longer the same sweet, open-hearted boy she left behind entirely by her own doing. She seems to have some awareness that she tossed their relationship away ("We had something so special"), but for the most part expects to pick up where they left off, hinting at wanting to cuddle him and go on walks alone and receive his attention the way she used to (kind of strange, considering how terrified she was in her letter that he would hate her for this). Ezran even acknowledges how much she's trying to get things back to they way they were. But she can't, not without understanding the gravity of her actions. I need season 5 to demonstrate how Rayla's journey changed her, because right now it seemed to have very little impact. Again, most of this can be fixed by future seasons, if they take the time to explain just what happened to Rayla during her time alone and what motivated her to suddenly return. And I'm decently confident it will, since clearly there's going to be a lot of Moonfam drama going down.

As for the Rayllum relationship, I was initially upset that there was no romance, especially with how it was hyped up in the marketing and after reading so many wonderful fics. After sleeping on it, I realized that's not my problem with it. It makes perfect sense that they wouldn't be ready to snuggle and kiss again yet. Most of my issues stem from the points addressed above, that Callum treated her so coldly instead of telling her how he felt and that Rayla expected to resume their romance without an apology or explanation (and dang, it was painful to watch him reject her, like a knife in my heart). A lot of their interactions were just... weird, as Soren put it. She sweetly tells him he was the best thing that ever happened to her (while he sleeps), then just... leaves and doesn't show up again until that night. Why? Where'd she go? What was she doing? She didn't think it might traumatize him to leave again while he slept, right after she came back? Lucky for her it didn't... which is even more weird. Callum doesn't even acknowledge Rayla's absence, or that she ever came back at all, upon waking up. She could've left for good again. That could've been the last time he ever saw her, and he's completely unfazed. Again... so, so weird coming from the lovelorn boy in 4x01. But one thing I just can't accept, that future seasons can't smooth out, was that when push came to shove, Callum let her go. Rayla sees Viren. Her worst fear, that impossible fear that drove her to abandon Callum for two years in the first place, is realized. Viren is alive, and this time, Callum knows it too. It makes sense to me that she'd go after him... this is her chance to complete her mission, to protect Callum once and for all. What doesn't make since, what I seriously doubt ever will, is that Callum lets her. This time, he knows she's right. He saw Viren with his own eyes! She's not chasing after a ghost, but a very real and very much alive dark mage who she nearly died fighting before. Yes, I think he was right to give her his blessing to fulfill her mission, but not in letting her go alone. Without him. He just got her back after two years! Two years of not knowing if she was dead or alive! Two years of misery and pining and feeling like his heart had been torn from his chest, and he just lets her do it again! This was his chance to prove to her that she was wrong, that they're stronger together, that they always have been. That she can't keep leaving him and breaking his heart, even if she thinks it's what's best for him. Particularly when there's a very good chance she could die. Callum has always called her out on her self-sacrificing tendencies in the past, but this time, when it matters most, nope. He lets her go without any argument. And then, he breaks down and sobs over her blade, believing she died in her efforts. Which was very sweet of course, and a much-need reassurance of the depths of his devotion to her, but honey??? You let her go, you let her run off alone to what would've been an impossible battle. What did you expect? I fear that had Rayla not gotten the coins, she would've continued chasing Viren and company instead of returning to the group, making it all for nothing. She's right back where she started.

There you have it. Most if not all of my salt over Rayllum in season 4. Thankfully, the season ended with Rayla wrapped in Callum's arms again, and the implication that he's ready to talk to her. But as much as I ravenously desire them to get back to the sweet, romantic, pitifully-in-love couple they were before, I need them to TALK. I need it to happen ON-SCREEN. I need Callum to vent all that heartache and betrayal, and I need Rayla to apologize, really apologize, and assure him that whatever they have to face in the future, they will face it together. I don't want Callum to forgive her while she thinks there's nothing to forgive, I don't want him trapped in an endless loop of abandonment and heartbreak, and I don't want Rayla left pining after the love of the man she's so hopelessly devoted to while he lets unspoken emotions continue to fester.

Let Callum voice his hurt. Let Rayla own up to her mistakes. Let them talk. Let them work through all the pain between them. Let them save each other's hearts and grow back into the precious love they've found. Please do my Rayllum right again.

[nomamah]

Decided to visit the dragon prince subreddit and that was a mistake, i had no idea that there were people who disliked this season that much. Why are people so mad about Barius.

[nomamah]

What if we called him A-a-ravos like that one meme A-a-ron.