nr-yb-wm-hm

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

Nancy: Why are Steve and Eddie sitting with their backs to each other?

Robin: They are fighting.

Nancy: Why are they holding hands then?

Robin: They get sad when they fight.

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

steve: you think I’m into eddie?

robin: yes, I do. because you are. 

nancy: you mentioned his name nine times in the past 10 minutes. 

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

dustin’s mother: dustin said a bad word at school today 

eddie: shit, why?

steve: what the fuck happened? 

robin: where the hell did he get that from? 

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

robin: hey, i’m going to mcdonald’s you guys want anything? 

nancy: I want barb to be alive 

dustin: I want eddie back 

lucas: i want max to wake up 

robin:

robin: i have like, $12

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

eddie: i want to be a caterpillar. 

steve: explain? 

eddie: eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful. 

steve: you know they also have a life span of like two weeks right? 

eddie: that is a highlight 

steve: eDdIe nO

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

dustin: you wanna hear a chemistry joke? 

mike: ...

dustin: is that a no? 

mike: i’m sorry did you want a reaction? 

dustin: *giggles and high-fives mike*

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

eddie: *accidentally hits steve in the face*

eddie’s high af mind: *trying to decide between saying ‘are you okay’ and ‘i’m sorry*

eddie: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY

steve: *chokes back tears* w-why-

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

hopper: (side-eyeing murray) (speaking in russian that he learned from prison) so murray, what are we doing for dinner tomorrow? 

murray: (in russian) i’m not particular, why are you glaring at the child crow? 

hopper: (still in russian) you mean mike? i’m trying to get him to back off and leave el. do you like chinese? 

murray: (again in russian) *mad scientist smile at eleven* yeah i love chinese food. 

hopper and murray: (scowling at mike and eleven)

mike: does your dad know that i’m with will now? 

el:  no i would never out you guys. just put your hands up and back away. 

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

Group Chat

dustin: minute and minute shouldn’t be spelt the same

eddie: i’m not content with this content

steve: i object to that object

lucas: i need to read what i read again

mike: excuse me, but there’s no excuse for this

will: someone should wind this thread up and throw it into the end

robin: i hope you don’t mind but you just fucked with my mind

eleven: you are ALL just like papa

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

dustin: dashing through the halls

lucas: failed my test todayyy-

dustin: don’t know what to doooo

lucas: with my life ho o r a y

dustin: JINGLE BELLS

lucas: TAKING L’SSSS

dustin: hIt Me WiTh A sLeIgH

lucas: I’m so done

dustin: this isn’t fun

lucas: there goes my gpa

steve:

eddie:

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

eddie: what are your superpowers? 

eleven: telekinesis, depression, manipulating the bodies of creatures, yo mamma jokes-

eddie:  yo mama jokes? 

eleven: well, I don’t have parents so they can’t say anything back

eddie: me too *highfives*

steve: please, i’m both of your daddy

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

Steve: *sees the broken coffee machine* alright. Who broke it?Everyone:

Steve: I’m not angry, just tell me who it was

Eleven: I did, I broke it

Steve: No, no you didn’t

Steve: dustin?

Dustin: don’t look at me! Look at Mike!!

Mike: What? I didn’t break it

Dustin: huh, that’s weird, then how did you even know it was broken

Mike: because Steve literally just put it in front of us and it’s broken

Dustin: suspicious

Lucas: Will was the last one to use it

Will: that’s not true, I don’t even drink that garbage

Eleven: Let's not fight, I broke it, let me pay for it

Steve: No, Eleven, stop trying to save everyone. Who broke it?

Steve: *to Max, a while later* I broke it. It burned my hand so I threw it down the stairs.

Steve: I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Max: Good. It was getting too friendly around here.

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

dustin: hey steve, did you know that ‘thot’ means ‘thoughtful person’?

steve: really?

[later]

steve: thanks for helping me hook up the wifi, eddie. you’re such a thot. 

eddie: *chokes* i’m a WHAT

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

Lucas: whomst’ve drank the ocean juice 

Eddie: should we call the exorcist? 

Dustin: i’ms’tve consumed the ice blood 

Steve: call the exorcist. 

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

Dustin:  billie eilish is the most hardworking, successful teenager I know

Eleven: I can flip a van with my mind 

Dustin: But can you pay your parents’ bills?

Eleven:

Eleven: I don’t have parents 

[nr-yb-wm-hm]

I don’t know how, when, or why it happened, but Tom Cruise is and forever will be gay in my head.