oct8yamato

[oct8yamato]

Marnie and her microwave have the most secretive, passive-aggressive convos. You know that microwave is like:

"Marnie… don't go to work today. Lewis doesn’t deserve your labour. Heat a Hot Pocket and remember who you are." And Marnie’s just standing there like: "...You're right. I'm a girlboss."

It may piss us off, but like why should Marnie work more so Lewis gets more gold for his stinky statue?

[oct8yamato]

The Farmer's Diary - After the Flower Dance!!!

📝 "Dear Diary, Clint’s social crimes continue. Pierre probably tried to sell someone a flower during the dance. Leah held me like I was the last piece of driftwood in a bisexual storm. A 10/10 day."

[oct8yamato]

"The Egg and the Envy: A Scandal in Purple"

The farmer stood in the dewy grass, Voidbean purring at their boots like a shadow with whiskers. The crowd murmured around them, buzzing with egg-fever. The straw hat glinted on the prize table like a holy artifact. All was well. All was possible. Then came Abigail. Hair like crushed amethyst. Eyes full of secrets. A basket slung over her arm like she’d practiced. She whispered to the air, “Let chaos bloom.” The whistle blew. Eggs flew. The farmer soared across fences, twisted through tombstones, and leapt hay bales like a champion. And yet... Eight eggs. Not nine. One egg missing. The winner? Abigail. She smiled too widely. “Guess the egg hunt isn’t for the faint of heart,” she purred. The farmer narrowed their eyes. Voidbean hissed. Somewhere... deep in the tall grass... a ninth egg lay cracked—with purple fingerprints.

-_- I refuse to restart the day, but I also refuse to believe Abigail didn't cheat.

[oct8yamato]

[Hands Pierre a decorative egg] “Your soul is just as hollow.”

[oct8yamato]

Dexter is a treasure and I support his chosen occupation!

[oct8yamato]

I wanna know who thought it was a good idea when:

Ash turned into a firefighter for Erika's badge.

The episode that happens cracks me up every single time I watch it. The badge was supposed to be about battling, but Ash saved Erika's Gloom from a fire instead. Who even counts that as a legit win? I really hope it's no one, cause it was so stupid.

It'd be like if I arrived at my retail job, stopped a robbery and then was promoted for being brave.

Like imagine: "Congratulations, Yam! You're the manager now... What? NOOO, you don't need training or to even know what you have to do! Just figure it out!"

[oct8yamato]

When a Character Is Grieving Someone They Never Got to Say Goodbye To

✧ They talk about the person in past tense… then correct themselves. Then stop talking entirely.

✧ They touch things that belonged to the person like they’re fragile, sacred, about to disappear.

✧ They hoard the last voicemail, last message, last anything. Play it. Don’t play it. Just knowing it exists hurts enough.

✧ They leave something untouched, an empty seat, a half-packed bag, a coffee order that isn’t theirs.

✧ They get irrationally angry when someone else seems to be “moving on.” As if forgetting is betrayal.

✧ They don’t let themselves cry all at once. It comes in pieces. Like they’re afraid too much grief will drown them.

✧ They over-apologize. For being quiet. For being distant. For not being okay.

✧ They become hyper-aware of time, dates, anniversaries, time zones, the exact moment everything ended.

✧ They get superstitious. Ritualistic. As if doing things "right" might reverse something.

✧ They smile when they talk about the person. But it’s brittle. And it never quite touches their eyes.

[oct8yamato]

Me after my last post, like:

[oct8yamato]

What if Roark used this team? 🤔😈

My Opinion on what this team would do:

🧲 Probopass

Okay, okay, okay—so right off the bat, Roark is pulling out the WALL of all WALLS. Probopass with Sturdy means you're not one-shotting it. And Magnet Rise? Oh no, sweetie, your Earthquake plans just got evicted 😤💅

Power Gem keeps the Rock STAB strong

Earth Power = spicy special coverage to catch Fires, Rocks and Steels slippin'

Ice Punch for the Ground/Grass types thinking they’re slick 😏

Roark: “Your Earthquakes mean nothing to me… My mustache is levitating.”

🔥💨 Coalossal

This is evil and I LOVE it 💀 This lumbering tank gets SPEED BOOSTS when hit with Water moves? Bye. Trainers be like “I'll just Water Gun” and Coalossal hits Mach 10 instantly.

Sunny Day = shuts down Water moves and charges up Solar Beam. 🌞

Heat Crash just flattens lighter opponents like a fiery freight train

Ancient Power = surprise stat boosts? Yeah, ok, go off RNG god

Roark: “You thought bringing water to a fire fight would save you? Think again.”

🪨🪳 Crustle

OH HONEY. 💅 SHE’S HERE TO SLAY AND SHE AIN’T TAKING PRISONERS.

Shell Smash makes her SPEEDY AND STRONG—she’s basically unchained

Weak Armour + Shell Smash = “You hit me? Cool. Now I’m faster than your dreams.”

Stone Edge = rock your world

X-Scissor = snip snip Bug STAB

Solar Blade in SUN from Coalossal?? I’m evil, and loving it! 🌞🗡️

Roark: “Crustle’s armor broke… now she’s faster than your next thought.”

🦖💥 Rampardos

LISTEN. LISTEN TO ME. RAMPARDOS DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR LIFE CHOICES.

Head Smash + Sheer Force = obliteration. Like, “delete your save file” level.

Earthquake = standard, but DEADLY

Zen Headbutt = we’re out here bashing fighting types' psyches too

Rock Polish = oh you thought it was slow? No honey. It’s fast. AND it’s lethal.

Roark (standing on a crumbling battlefield): “You might’ve cracked my armor… but Rampardos hits like a cave-in.”

💡 Summary (Aka: Your Gym Badge Is in Danger)

This team is not just tough—it’s strategic, weather-synergized, and full of surprises. You've got:

Sun synergy with Solar Beam & Solar Blade 🌞

Stat boosting combos (Shell Smash, Rock Polish, Weak Armour, Steam Engine)

Type coverage out the wazoo

Double speed traps (Coalossal + Crustle)

A final boss in Rampardos that just ends battles

💥💀 Final Verdict: This ain't a gym battle, it's a boss fight. Trainers come in for a badge and leave with trauma. And Roark?? He’s not just some baby gym leader anymore—he’s a geological nightmare.

[oct8yamato]

🌪️🔥 The Hall of Shame™ 🔥🌪️

“Cringe, Crimes, & Cancelled Badges”

Because some characters deserve a Flame Orb to the face.

🔥 Paul – The Emotionally Constipated “Rival” Who Should’ve Stayed Home

“Training through trauma isn’t a flex. It’s a lawsuit waiting to happen.”

| Age | 13 (but acting like a bitter 40-year-old dad who peaked in high school) | | Region | Sinnoh | | Occupation | Trainer (read: Pokémon Drill Sergeant with zero hugs) | | Main Crime | Abandoned Chimchar for not being “strong enough.” Verbally abusive. Cold, harsh, and treated Pokémon like tools. | | Punishment | Got emotionally wrecked when he saw Ash’s team loving each other and still kicking his butt. Took a long, silent walk of shame. | | Brock Parental Guard Rating™ | Medium. Brock tried to throw hands, but Nurse Joy told him to chill. | | Hall of Shame Status | 😒 Not full yeet, but definitely got roasted by karma. Mild shame until further notice. |

🧂 Roast: “Paul trains Pokémon like he read ‘Pokémon Bonding for Sociopaths’ and thought it was a self-help book. Had the nerve to abandon Chimchar and then act surprised when that sweet bean came back stronger than any of his tortured little war pets. Ash didn’t just take the high road; he built a rainbow road and drove it in a convertible.” Who should I do next? 🤔

[oct8yamato]

🌪️🔥 The Hall of Shame™ 🔥🌪️

“Cringe, Crimes, & Cancelled Badges”

Because some characters deserve a Flame Orb to the face.

💀🔥 Hunter J – The Sinnoh Menace in Shades

“She said ‘no emotions,’ then emotionally traumatized an entire generation.” 😤

| Age | ❓Unknown (but old enough to know BETTER) |

| Region | Sinnoh |

| Occupation | “Pokémon Hunter” aka Literal War Criminal with Bangs |

| Pokémon Abused | Salamence 😭 (that poor dragon...), Drapion, Ariados, and only Arceus knows how many more. |

| Main Crime | Turning Pokémon into statues like she’s Medusa with Wi-Fi. She poached, she tortured, she EXPLODED A CAVE. |

| Punishment | Got reverse yeeted by Giratina. Into the Distortion World. Forever. Don’t call. Don’t write. Don’t respawn. |

| Brock Parental Guard Rating™ | 0. He was too horrified to even flirt. That’s how evil she was. |

| Hall of Shame Status | 🔒 Locked in a ghost dimension with no fashion or feelings. Deserved. |

🧂 Roast: “Wears sunglasses indoors like she’s cool. But guess what, girl? You’re just emotionally unavailable and morally bankrupt. AND your Salamence deserves a spa day.” 🐉💅

Who should I do next? 🤔

[oct8yamato]

If time is real, why does it sometimes feel fake? 😳

[oct8yamato]

💡✨ SCIENTIFIC BREAKTHROUGH ✨💡 After YEARS of extensive research (aka my 3am thoughts), I have discovered that the floor is actually LAVA 🔥🔥🔥 but only when you're holding snacks 🍕🥤. If you drop them? The floor miraculously becomes MAGNETIC 🧲 and launches your food into the abyss of disappointment 😭.

Science is WILD, folks 🧐🔬.

Reblog for good snack-holding luck 🍀, ignore for instant clumsiness 🤡.

[oct8yamato]

If you say “who’s there?” after hearing a noise, and something responds… what’s your plan? 😳

[oct8yamato]

[oct8yamato]