positivesex2018-blog

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On a personal note... | Positive Sex This week, my partner (in Positive sex, & life) Micheal & I celebrated our 14 year anniversary together which was lovely <3 Being busy with few resources, I was expecting nothing more than his beautifully written card.   It was made even more special when he walked in the house with these beautiful, personally hand-picked flowers & blooms <3 I felt the love <3 And I still received a beautiful card with some truly lovely words <3 Good times, bad times, happiness, sadness, pleasure, discomfort, positive, negative, acceptance, passion, growth, learning, laughter & tears - we are together, & we face it all together.  We both continue to try our best for ourselves, & each other. To me, this is love <3 xo www.positivesex.com #relationships #love #anniversary #positivesex

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Honesty and Truth | Positive Sex

Hello everyone! With honesty & trust being such important aspects of our closest relationships, today we are asking - do you believe that 'little' lies & omitting of truths effects our relationships?

According to Angela Haupt, most of us tell a lie around 11 times per week. Perhaps, 'little' white lies or omittances of truth to save face or to spare someone's feelings may be the majority of these untruths, but we have to ask - do these have an effect on our health, or on our relationships?

In this article, Angela looks at research compiled through the University of Notre Dame in Indiana about the effects that these 'little' lies & untruths have on our health.

https://health.usnews.com/health-news/articles/2012/08/20/how-lying-affects-your-health

And in this article, Jenna explores why & how we lie or omit the truth.

https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/life-strategies/truth-about-lying

A very interesting subject with many differing perspectives.  What is your perspective on this topic? We'd love to hear from you <3 xo

www.positivesex.com

#trust #truth #relationships #communication #positivesex

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Spectatoring | Positive Sex

Hello everyone! Spectatoring...have you heard of it?

This term was first coined by the world-renowned sex researchers, Masters & Johnson, in 1970. Now, we know what you may be thinking but NO, this is not about watching other people have sex! 😊

In simple terms, spectator-ing is mentally ‘watching’ yourself during sex while running an anxious, & self-conscious internal-dialogue. Anyone can be susceptible to spectator-ing for many reasons, and while further research has been continued since 1970, the one consistent answer to combating this problem is mindfulness.

"Spectatoring & The Relationship Between Body Image & Sexual Experience: Self-Focus or Self-Valence?" by Paul D. Trapnell, Cindy M. Meston & Boris B. Gorzalka - "A recently reported finding that negative body image is associated with lower levels of sexual experience was replicated in a large, ethnically diverse sample of undergraduates..." Very revealing excerpt from The Journal of Sex Research.

https://labs.la.utexas.edu/mestonlab/files/2014/10/1997-Meston-Trapnell-Gorzalka.pdf

Have you ever been a ‘spectator’ during sex? Do you experience this regularly? What has helped you? We would love to know what you think? <3🙏💕🌻🕉️ xo

www.positivesex.com

#spectatoring #selfjudgement #selfawareness #positivesex

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For the folks in Brisbane, Australia <3 xo

https://metronorth.health.qld.gov.au/hospitals-services/sexual-health-hiv-services

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Borosilicate Glass | Positive Sex Borosilicate glass adult toys available now from positivesex.com - Quality - Strong - Durable - Smooth - Sleek - Sexy 😉💕💜 Check out www.positivesex.com/shop today!! www.positivesex.com #borosilicateglass #glasstoys #adulttoys #positivesex

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Anger | Positive Sex

According to collinsdictionary.com, anger can be defined as '...the strong emotion that you feel when you think that someone has behaved in an unfair, cruel, or unacceptable way.' Anger, frustration, resentment - do we really know how damaging these emotions are when we regularly experience them?  Yes, there is quite a lot known about how these emotions can affect us. For some of us, we may feel anger, frustration & resentment daily.  It may not be acted out, spoken of, or seen on the exterior - however, we are all capable at times of having those thoughts that keep circling back, reiterating the need to feel negatively.

'How Anger Affects Your Brain And Body' from www.iahe.com - This pdf is a very informative, easy to understand, & illustrated caption of what happens to the body & brain when we experience anger. This pdf offers some ways in which to deal with anger in a health manner.

https://personalexcellence.co/blog/anger-infographic/

'The Effects of Anger on the Brain and Body' from the National Forum Journal Of Counseling And Addiction VOLUME 2, NUMBER 1, 2013 from www.nationalforum.com - This paper is a more indepth look at anger, & expands upon how anger can affect many areas of our health & lives.

http://www.nationalforum.com/Electronic%20Journal%20Volumes/Hendricks,%20LaVelle%20The%20Effects%20of%20Anger%20on%20the%20Brain%20and%20Body%20NFJCA%20V2%20N1%202013.pdf

If we are learning anything throughout our difficult times, it is that we need to truly know our-authentic-selves, all dark & light elements. There are many ways to express, & use our anger in healthy ways - however, it is important to really understand why we are experiencing these emotions. Sometimes, it is simply choosing not to cultivate those negative thoughts.  And sometimes, the biggest challenge is to walk away from a toxic or negative situation without anger, frustration or resentment. <3 xo

www.positivesex.com

#anger #negativeemotion #frustration #resentment #positivesex

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Dams | Positive Sex No, we aren’t talking about a large body of water, 🏊 we are talking about a regular size piece of latex approximately 25cm (10”) x 15cm (6”). Also known as Oral Barriers, they can help reduce the risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections when participating in oral sex. Oral barriers like “Glyde Dams” are easily available at www.positivesex.com, as well as your local pharmacies without a prescription. There are also some great tips in this link on how to “make your own” oral barriers, if you have come to a situation unprepared. 😊 https://www.optionsforsexualhealth.org/sexual-health/sexually-transmitted-infections/barriers/oral-dams These are a very inexpensive way to help protect yourself & your sexual partners from STI’s & should seriously be considered by anyone engaging in oral sex. Whether you are engaging in oral sex with multiple casual partners or the same long term partner, they can also protect all sexual partners from the spread of infections from anal germs. Do the right thing by your sexual health & invest $7 on some oral barriers. It may just be the best $7 you ever spent! 😊 ❤ xo www.positivesex.com https://www.positivesex.com/product/sheer-glyde-dams-safe-oral-sex/ #safesex #oralbarriers #dams #sexualhealth #positivesex

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Truth or Myth | Positive Sex Hello folks! <3  As difficult as it is to believe, there are still many myths floating around on the topic of sex & sexual health, & we thought that this was a great article to clarify some of those. Do you have any myths that you have found to be untrue?  We'd love to hear from you! <3🕉️💜🙏🌻 xo https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/common-myths-about-sex-and-sexual-pleasure-a6673941.html www.positivesex.com #myths #truths #sexualhealth #positivesex

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Acceptance | Positive Sex This post is for all of our brothers & sisters in life <3  Old, young, positive, negative, fulfilled, unsatisfied, open, closed, loud, quiet, helpful, unhelpful, passive, aggressive, graceful, awkward, cautious, adventurous, respectful, disrespectful, happy, sad…whatever your sexual or romantic orientation, gender, race, culture, ability, lifestyle choice or state of mind – you are an important part of life.  You matter, & you always will.  There is no-one else exactly like you.  You are beautiful & unique.  With all the minutes in this day, & with all the responsibilities you need to meet today – take 5 minutes to remember just how truly bloody awesome you really are <3 💕🕉️🙏💜xo https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/evolution-the-self/200809/the-path-unconditional-self-acceptance www.positivesex.com #acceptance #selfacceptance #selfawareness #mentalhealth #positivesex

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Communication | Positive Sex Hello everyone! <3  Today, we are looking at the true accceptance of diversity, which we express through our everyday words.  What we say indicates our perspectives on inclusion, or exclusion, of those with differing race, culture, sexuality, orientation, age, gender identity, thoughts & ideas. So, have you ever considered that how we use our words may sometimes cause others to feel included or excluded? 'WordsAtWork - Building inclusion through the power of language' from dca.org.au - The Diversity Council Australia - This article gives a guideline for diverse & inclusive language.  While the Diversity Council are particularly focused on work places, to us, this seems relevant for all areas of our lives.  Focusing on the fundamentals of respect, accuracy & relevance, there is an informative pdf link - "Words at Work."  Very interesting, easy to read and well stated <3 💕🕉️xo https://www.dca.org.au/research/project/wordsatwork-building-inclusion-through-power-language https://www.dca.org.au/sites/default/files/dca_wordsatwork_overall_guide.pdf www.positivesex.com #communication #relationships #diversity #inclusion #positivesex

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Squirting | Positive Sex Yes, lovely people, today we are talking about squirting, & the female ejaculation.  The definition of squirting is, “the expulsion of fluid through and around the urethra during or before an orgasm.” The difference is described as follows - “Female ejaculation involves the release of a thick, whitish fluid from the female prostate, whereas squirting…is the release of clear fluid from the bladder.” While the above picture may be a slight exaggeration, 😉 there is a lot of talk about these subjects, & plenty of advice on how to achieve both.  However, there are still areas of debate. For example, is there any urine content in the liquid ejaculated during ‘squirting?’ Lots of differing opinions… 'How To Make A Girl Squirt | My Simple Method To Give Her Squirting G-Spot Orgasms' by Charles Black from YouTube.com - In this video, Charles Black talks about the mechanics of getting a vulva owner to squirt. Although we need to add, at Positive Sex, we always believe in open, honest communication between everyone, especially sexual partners. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5MJ8bB3MD4&has_verified=1 With all of the advice that is on the internet, the main points in preparing to ‘squirt’ are:1) If you are concerned about evacuating urine in the process, pee before you start.2) Relax & enjoy – massage first, then move towards genital massage.  Some recommend spending 20 minutes on the body massage then 20 minutes on genital massage.  The owner of the vulva needs to be excited, & fully engaged in the process of enjoying the stimulation. Do you squirt, or does your partner squirt?  We’d love to hear from you 😊<3🕉️🤔🕉️💕xo www.positivesex.com #squirting #femaleejaculaion #orgasm #positivesex

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Monogamy | Positive Sex

In exploring the diversity of relationships, we need to look at monogamy.  For a moment, putting aside social acceptance, tradition & religion, monogamy works for many people.

This is a lovely article by Zosia Bielski is an interesting perspective on the subject of monogamy, and looks into years of research & study that has gone into the book, 'Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships', by Ottawa clinical psychologist Dr. Sue Johnson.  A great read <3 Does monogamy work for you? <3🕉️🌻💕 xo

www.positivesex.com #monogamy #relationships #diversity #acceptance #positivesex

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BDSM | Positive Sex Do you have pre-conceived ideas about BDSM or about somebody who takes part in BDSM activities? There are documented and legitimate scientific studies that show that for some people, BDSM is an avenue of consistent and healthy practice in mindfulness and balance. As with absolutely everything in life, there can be both positive and negative elements. It is about understanding and recognizing how these elements may work for some, and not for others. We are all unique, and each on our own personal journey. Do you have any characteristics that may be considered a little bit kinky? Where are you on your journey of self-discovery? Would you ever consider trying BDSM practices? Have you already tried or are you already practicing BDSM activities? Are you or have you experienced any positive or negative elements from your practice? We would love to hear about your experiences so we can all help each other on our individual journeys’? <3🕉️💕☀️🌻 xo www.positivesex.com #BDSM #fetish #lifestyle #mindfulness #balance #positivesex

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Sexual Health | Positive Sex Sexual Health…what is sexual health?  It is in our Positive Sex bi-line (Advocates for Sexual Health & Self-Awareness). And it is what we are all about 😊 According to www.who.int, (The World Health Organisation) Sexual Health is defined as, “…a state of physical, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality. It requires a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence.” For us here at Positive Sex, we feel that sexual health is encompassing of all these elements.  But most importantly to us, is the ability to be able to communicate freely & honestly about how we identify with our self-expression, what we want, & what we do not want with our sexual partners, peers & healthcare professionals. This is important to us as this ultimately leads to acceptance, self-acceptance, understanding & freedom to explore what feels good with our consenting adult partners. What does sexual health mean to you?  Are you comfortable discussing your sexual health & sexuality?  Who do you talk to about these subjects? We’d love to hear from you <3 🕉️☀️💕xo http://www.who.int/topics/sexual_health/en/ www.positivesex.com #sexualhealth #sexuality #relationships #connection #positivesex #theworldhealthorganisation

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Different Positions | Positive Sex Looking for some different positions to try this weekend?

https://www.netmums.com/life/100-kamasutra-sex-positions

Not a lot of explanation given - but we get the idea <3 🕉️💕💜xo

www.positivesex.com

#relationships #sexualactivities #connection #positivesex