sagereeid

[sagereeid]

My quirky king 👑

@thatkliqkid on tiktok

[sagereeid]

I saw this on Twitter and I'm still laughing

@/tourturedpoets

[sagereeid]

scars that never healed. - s.r. - chapter 15

a/n - hi the last week as been such an emotional rollercoaster and I kind of hate this chapter but I hope you like it.

Warnings - mentions of depression/being depressed, mentions of kinda non con but not really its weird, aftermath of last chapter, very “pushing it down and praying”, kinda argument, spencer realizes he fucked up, not really edited at all. Please let me know if I missed anything.

Spencer saw it too, he wasn’t an idiot. Profiling human behavior was his job for God's sake. He knew he saw something but he didn't know the root cause of that something.

Why could he feel her shiver every time he touched her? Not in a good way, in the skin crawling time of way. Why did it feel like she wasn’t going out of her way to talk to him like they usually do? Spencer noticed of the course of this past week that she only talks to him when she literally has to, especially at work. They practically live together and she barely talks to him.

Why was she being so cold?

It’s not like he doesn't have any idea. Spencer knows he asks for a lot quite often but that’s their normal, right?

He also noticed other things about her. After work, she would go straight to her bedroom, and wouldn't come out to eat or drink or anything. When he would come in, she would already be asleep and in the same clothes she wore throughout the day.

Today was a Friday but Spencer already knew that there wasn’t going to be any laughing on the couch over a glass of wine. Today would go just like the weather outside, cold and rainy and gray.

He followed behind her as she opened the door. Before he could take his coat off and turn around again, she had already disappeared into the confines of her bedroom.

He sighed to himself. Rationally, he knows he shouldn’t be angry. They weren’t dating. They weren’t living together. None of that mattered.

Before he knew it, he was standing outside of her bedroom door. Deja vu from the other way around.

Without thinking twice, or really even at all, he knocked on the door. It was a soft sound, it was honest barely even there.

“Yeah?” Lily spoke from the other side of the door. Her voice sounded so ruff, Spencer was convinced she hadn't spoken in days. And she hasn’t, to him at least.

“Can I come in?” He asked softly. And after some shuffling she responded with a small “yes” and after a quick deep breath he bit the bullet and pushed the door open.

It was as if he was looking over her with fresh eyes. Her hair was all messy and tousled like she hadn’t washed it in a few days. Her cheeks were lined with mascara watered down by tears.Her eyes wre all red and puffy. What did he do to her?

Without thinking she rushed over to the edge of the bed and sat there.

“What?” She asked. It wasn’t as defensive as Spencer expected it to be. It was worse, empty and devoid of any emotion.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, his finger tracing the outline of her calf from the outside of the covers.

He felt her muscles stiffen from beneath and something stirred in his stomach.

“Please talk to me, Lils.” He says, his voice almost pleading, like a prayer.

“What are we?” She blurted out, her voice still rough. God, all of this was so confusing for the both of them. Spencer knew that this could go one of two ways, a good way and a bad way. He has to choose his words very carefully.

“I don’t know.” He blurted out an answer before he could think. For someone with such a high IQ, it’s so odd how his brain shut off when he’s around her.

“What do you want us to be?” He asked as the tips of his fingers finally stopped tracing her leg.

“I don’t want to feel used, Spencer.”

Used. The works rang in his head. What does she mean she felt used? He repeated the word in his head until it lost all meaning.

“You feel used?” He asked the obvious, still avoiding her gaze.

“Remember a few nights ago?” She asked, her voice still barely above a whisper. He knows what she’s talking about but he didn’t think it was that bad.

“What about it?” He asked. Lily sighed. Why is he so clueless?

“I felt like you were just using me to get off. When you were done you just rolled off of me and got in the shower. I didn’t come..fuck that, I didn’t even want to do it.” She spat out. She can’t exactly say she wasn’t angry but she was more hurt than anything.

All while Spencer just stared at her dumb founded. He immediately pulled her up into a hug, and for the first time in a few days, she didn’t pull away or feel wrong leaning into it. It didn’t feel preformative anymore.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t even know what I was thinking. I’m so stupid.” He rambled as he stroked her hair and of course, Lily leaned into it. Letting herself be comforted.

They stayed like that for a really long time, into the early morning hours. Until they were both half awake and tangled with each other.

Lily was laying on Spencer’s chest, listening to his heartbeat and he’s playing with her hair and they’re both silently watching reruns of old cartoons.

“You’re forgiven.” Lily said, nuzzling ethier into his chest.

“Thank you. I promise I’ll never do anything like that ever again. There’s no excuse for it.” He promises, playing with her hair and pulling her closer.

“I love you.” She mumbles as she closes her eyes. Spencer felt his heart leapt out of his chest. He looks down at her. Watched as she breasted in and out and the constant rise and fall of her chest.

“I love you, too.” He whispered and watched as her lips twisted up in the sweetest smile he had ever seen. He kissed her forehead and after that she faded off to sleep.

Once he knew she was asleep, he gave her one last smile and fades off to sleep himself.

[sagereeid]

Note

Hi my loves, I’m writing this little note to just update you on some things. So, as you guys know, I try to update as much as possible and I used to be on a schedule but I’m in the last few weeks of my junior year of high school and finals and final projects are coming up plus the job I already have and I’m looking for another job. There’s a lot of things happening in my life. That being said, you might go a few days or maybe even a few weeks without hearing from me. I hope it doesn’t get that bad but this is just a heads up. I am going to try my absolute hardest to get things out as soon as possible while still keeping them as good as I can. And to everyone who has been supporting me and this story, whether it was chapter one or the most recent one. Thank you so much! For everything, for all the likes and follow and kind words. I truly appreciate it. You guys don’t really know me but I am just a girl in high school who likes writing and had this silly idea and I never thought people would like it this much. So thank you, thank you, thank you. That’s all for now, chapter 15 will becoming as soon as possible.

Love always, sage.

[sagereeid]

Note

Hi my loves, I’m writing this little note to just update you on some things. So, as you guys know, I try to update as much as possible and I used to be on a schedule but I’m in the last few weeks of my junior year of high school and finals and final projects are coming up plus the job I already have and I’m looking for another job. There’s a lot of things happening in my life. That being said, you might go a few days or maybe even a few weeks without hearing from me. I hope it doesn’t get that bad but this is just a heads up. I am going to try my absolute hardest to get things out as soon as possible while still keeping them as good as I can. And to everyone who has been supporting me and this story, whether it was chapter one or the most recent one. Thank you so much! For everything, for all the likes and follow and kind words. I truly appreciate it. You guys don’t really know me but I am just a girl in high school who likes writing and had this silly idea and I never thought people would like it this much. So thank you, thank you, thank you. That’s all for now, chapter 15 will becoming as soon as possible.

Love always, sage.

[sagereeid]

my favorite genre of pictures: mgg in spencer costume laying on the ground with animals on his chest….ugh

[sagereeid]

[sagereeid]

scars the never healed. - s.r. - chapter 14

a/n - so many things are happening in my life so here some angst for really no one but me. Hope you enjoy it anyway. This is kinda inspired by the songs “Pushing it down and praying” by Lizzy McAlpine and “Slut era interlude” by ROLE MODEL.

Warnings - kinda non con but not really, I don't really know what to call it. Smut but not the fun kind. Not really edited. Mostly written in one sitting.

Another Wednesday had come and gone and there Spencer was, at Lily’s door. Lily noticed when she opened the door, he didn’t seem sad or angry or anything really. Or at least that’s what it looks like. He kind of just stared at her with a blank expression, which was weird to her but Lily isn’t one to police how her boyfri- Spencer feels.

As soon as she opened the door he pushed back her, not before giving her a small smile, but still. It’s not how they usually do things so it felt odd to her. Nevertheless, she turned and followed him into the living room. He was there, sitting on her couch, looking up at her like he was waiting for her to do something.

“Do you want tea?” She asks but Spencer shakes his head.

“Water, please.” He answered and then looked at the T.V. Lily nodded but felt this weird pang in her heart as she walked into the kitchen.

She returned with his glass of water and set it down on the side table before taking her seat next to him.

“How was it?” She asked, leaning her head on her hand, her elbow propped up against the couch cushion.

“Fine.” He said, quick and short. He didn’t take his eyes off the T.V.

This is so weird. Lily thought to herself. Her gut was telling her that he was telling her the truth. Everything was fine. But there was obviously something he was hiding from her. Otherwise, he would at least be looking at her.

She sat there with her thoughts for a moment. Her mind is trying to make sense of his behavior. I mean, she is a profiler, can you blame her?

Her thoughts were interrupted by a hand on her thigh. Of course, it was Spencer's familiar warmth of his skin biting through the fabric of his skin biting through her clothes.

She blinked away her thoughts and looked down. His whole hand was gripping her thigh, not tightly but, just enough to where she knew it there.

“You okay?” She whispered and Spencer finally turned his head and smiled at her. He looked as if he'd been on the couch all day and she had just sat down with him.

“Yeah, I’m good.” He said, squeezing her thigh again. His smile, it looked so real. I mean it was, or Lily thought it was, But, there was something behind it and she couldn't figure it out. I was driving her crazy.

She huffed and allowed her thoughts to clear and gave into his touch, burrowing her head into the spot between his neck and shoulder, it was a long day for both of them after all.

Just then, Spencer turned to her and started kissing her face slowly. Starting at her forehead, then the part between her eyebrows, then her nose, the both cheek, then her chin, then, finally, her lips.

Each movement of his lips was slow and deliberate and made him want more of her.

But for Lily, the kiss felt..proformative. Lily loved kissing Spencer, sometimes she liked kissing him more than doing anything else. It just felt more intimate to her.

However, as the kiss got more intense, the more Spencer started touching her, the more she didn’t feel like kissing back but for some reason, Lily couldn’t stop him. Everytime she would pull away, he would pull her back in, closer and kiss her harder.

It’s not like she wanted it to stop, she didn’t want it to go further than she knew it would. Before she knew it, she was being pulled up off the couch and towards her own bedroom.

“Wait, Spence-” She tired, her voice slurred from the exhaustion of the day mixed with the many thoughts swirling around in her head.

“Please.” Was the only thing that came out of his mouth as he opened her door and gently nudged her into it.

“Please let me have this.” He mumbled, leading her to the bed.

“Okay.” She whispered. That was all Spencer needed to hear. He laid Lily on the bed and striped her down, leaving quick kisses on her thighs as he peeled her leggings off. She stared at the ceiling, thinking about everything and nothing at the same time.

Lily lays there as he strips himself and strokes himself a few times before putting on a condom and entering her with a grunt. She laid there and burned a hole in the eling with her gaze. Something within her didn’t feel right and she didn’t know why she wasn't enjoying this. Neither of them seemed to care though.

She snapped back into reality when he mumbled how close he was and she started paying more attention. His thrusts became faster and more erratic and soon he let out a loud moan and came.

He pulled out and took his condom off, throwing it in the trash can by her bedside and rolled off of her, leaving her feeling more empty then she was before.

Lily’s vision became blurry as hot tears blurred her vision and she rolled over, her hands stretched out, subconsciously trying to find Spencer. But he wasn't there, she was confused until she heard the shower running.

This wasn’t how Spencer normally was. When they had their fun, he would leave continent kisses on her shoulders and the top of her chest and whisper little praises while he pumped inside of her. Then after, he would shower her with even more kisses and nice words and clean her up and then they would both get into the shower together.

Spencer would be ever more careful there, hugging her from behind and kissing her shoulders and grazing his hands over her body as if trying to memorize every inch of her. Worshipping her like she was a piece of art.

Lily shook her head as a hot tear ran down her cheek as she rolled over again, her back facing away from the bathroom door. She felt weird, used even. Used so much she didn't want to be touched again.

However a few minutes later, after silently crying to herself, she heard the bathroom door open again and felt Spencer slide into bed with her, wrapping her arms around her. For the first time ever it made her skin crawl.

[sagereeid]

scars the never healed. - s.r. - chapter 14

a/n - so many things are happening in my life so here some angst for really no one but me. Hope you enjoy it anyway. This is kinda inspired by the songs “Pushing it down and praying” by Lizzy McAlpine and “Slut era interlude” by ROLE MODEL.

Warnings - kinda non con but not really, I don't really know what to call it. Smut but not the fun kind. Not really edited. Mostly written in one sitting.

Another Wednesday had come and gone and there Spencer was, at Lily’s door. Lily noticed when she opened the door, he didn’t seem sad or angry or anything really. Or at least that’s what it looks like. He kind of just stared at her with a blank expression, which was weird to her but Lily isn’t one to police how her boyfri- Spencer feels.

As soon as she opened the door he pushed back her, not before giving her a small smile, but still. It’s not how they usually do things so it felt odd to her. Nevertheless, she turned and followed him into the living room. He was there, sitting on her couch, looking up at her like he was waiting for her to do something.

“Do you want tea?” She asks but Spencer shakes his head.

“Water, please.” He answered and then looked at the T.V. Lily nodded but felt this weird pang in her heart as she walked into the kitchen.

She returned with his glass of water and set it down on the side table before taking her seat next to him.

“How was it?” She asked, leaning her head on her hand, her elbow propped up against the couch cushion.

“Fine.” He said, quick and short. He didn’t take his eyes off the T.V.

This is so weird. Lily thought to herself. Her gut was telling her that he was telling her the truth. Everything was fine. But there was obviously something he was hiding from her. Otherwise, he would at least be looking at her.

She sat there with her thoughts for a moment. Her mind is trying to make sense of his behavior. I mean, she is a profiler, can you blame her?

Her thoughts were interrupted by a hand on her thigh. Of course, it was Spencer's familiar warmth of his skin biting through the fabric of his skin biting through her clothes.

She blinked away her thoughts and looked down. His whole hand was gripping her thigh, not tightly but, just enough to where she knew it there.

“You okay?” She whispered and Spencer finally turned his head and smiled at her. He looked as if he'd been on the couch all day and she had just sat down with him.

“Yeah, I’m good.” He said, squeezing her thigh again. His smile, it looked so real. I mean it was, or Lily thought it was, But, there was something behind it and she couldn't figure it out. I was driving her crazy.

She huffed and allowed her thoughts to clear and gave into his touch, burrowing her head into the spot between his neck and shoulder, it was a long day for both of them after all.

Just then, Spencer turned to her and started kissing her face slowly. Starting at her forehead, then the part between her eyebrows, then her nose, the both cheek, then her chin, then, finally, her lips.

Each movement of his lips was slow and deliberate and made him want more of her.

But for Lily, the kiss felt..proformative. Lily loved kissing Spencer, sometimes she liked kissing him more than doing anything else. It just felt more intimate to her.

However, as the kiss got more intense, the more Spencer started touching her, the more she didn’t feel like kissing back but for some reason, Lily couldn’t stop him. Everytime she would pull away, he would pull her back in, closer and kiss her harder.

It’s not like she wanted it to stop, she didn’t want it to go further than she knew it would. Before she knew it, she was being pulled up off the couch and towards her own bedroom.

“Wait, Spence-” She tired, her voice slurred from the exhaustion of the day mixed with the many thoughts swirling around in her head.

“Please.” Was the only thing that came out of his mouth as he opened her door and gently nudged her into it.

“Please let me have this.” He mumbled, leading her to the bed.

“Okay.” She whispered. That was all Spencer needed to hear. He laid Lily on the bed and striped her down, leaving quick kisses on her thighs as he peeled her leggings off. She stared at the ceiling, thinking about everything and nothing at the same time.

Lily lays there as he strips himself and strokes himself a few times before putting on a condom and entering her with a grunt. She laid there and burned a hole in the eling with her gaze. Something within her didn’t feel right and she didn’t know why she wasn't enjoying this. Neither of them seemed to care though.

She snapped back into reality when he mumbled how close he was and she started paying more attention. His thrusts became faster and more erratic and soon he let out a loud moan and came.

He pulled out and took his condom off, throwing it in the trash can by her bedside and rolled off of her, leaving her feeling more empty then she was before.

Lily’s vision became blurry as hot tears blurred her vision and she rolled over, her hands stretched out, subconsciously trying to find Spencer. But he wasn't there, she was confused until she heard the shower running.

This wasn’t how Spencer normally was. When they had their fun, he would leave continent kisses on her shoulders and the top of her chest and whisper little praises while he pumped inside of her. Then after, he would shower her with even more kisses and nice words and clean her up and then they would both get into the shower together.

Spencer would be ever more careful there, hugging her from behind and kissing her shoulders and grazing his hands over her body as if trying to memorize every inch of her. Worshipping her like she was a piece of art.

Lily shook her head as a hot tear ran down her cheek as she rolled over again, her back facing away from the bathroom door. She felt weird, used even. Used so much she didn't want to be touched again.

However a few minutes later, after silently crying to herself, she heard the bathroom door open again and felt Spencer slide into bed with her, wrapping her arms around her. For the first time ever it made her skin crawl.

[sagereeid]

simple edit!!

[sagereeid]

it's not an x reader if it's an oc fucking idiot that was completely straightforward dumbass bitch

oh…it’s just a tag so more people will see it..i put “x oc” on all the chapters too…

enjoy regardless!

[sagereeid]

it's not an x reader if it's an oc fucking idiot that was completely straightforward dumbass bitch

oh…it’s just a tag so more people will see it..i put “x oc” on all the chapters too…

enjoy regardless!

[sagereeid]

[sagereeid]

a puppy when u blow on its nose:

[sagereeid]

GOOD LORD.

[sagereeid]

scars that never healed. - s.r. - chapter 13

a/n - I may or may not have written this because i need the absolute most comfort imaginable because this week is awful.

Warnings - none just fluff really

The week went by very slow, almost agonizingly so. At least, the case they had to walk into went by somewhat fast. It was pretty simple regarding the other cases they would have to solve that would take them weeks sometimes months on end to solve.

All throughout the week, Spencer and Lily started a new routine. Sunday was the one day Spencer would be at his apartment by himself. He would be there to watch his clothes and pack new ones in his bag and make sure everything was tidy. Then on Monday, he would meet Lily at work and go home with her. He would sleep over that day and go to work with her on Tuesday.

Then, Spencer would split from Lily after work and go to see his mother just like he would any other Wednesday, but he would always go home to her.Lily would always make pasta and tea that day. Which, albeit is a weird combo but it worked for both of them and brought comfort and warmth when it needed to.

And then, Thursday, Friday and Saturday would be the same as it was the day before. Today it was Friday. Spencer’s favorite day. And now, both of them were sitting on the couch, watching some random movie Spencer wasn’t paying attention to. They both had glasses of wine in their hands, occasionally sipping.

The more Spencer drank the more his good judgment went at the window. Lily would tell him about how loppy he would get on Saturday morning. How he would giggle at nothing. How he would just stare at her like she was the greatest thing on Earth. How his brain would reduce to mush when he was wine drunk and looked at her.

He was doing that now, looking at Lily like she was some God that blessed him with her presence. Only this time, she could feel his gaze on him, his eyes burning holes in her skin. Normally she wouldn’t give this a second though, maybe even blush and giggle if she was as whine drunk as him.

Only this day she didn’t. Instead, Lily shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. Spencer noticed this and titled his head. He sobered up for just a moment and took a good look at her for a moment. That’s when he noticed.

Notice her jaw clenched, her iron grip on the wine glass, her eyes focus on nothing more than the T.V. but 12 years of profiling told Spencer something else was on her mind.

“Lils?” He asked softly, putting his hand on her thigh, making her muscles tighten up even more.

“Yes?” She spat out, not on purpose she was just so tense that it felt like there was nothing else she could do.

“Lily, baby, what’s wrong?” He asked. The pet names have become normal at this point, slipping out before he could even think to correct it.

Lily didn’t say anything, she kept her eyes fixed on the T.V. in front of her, she pressed her lips into a line. Spencer sighed and turned off the T.V. to get her attention. She whipped her head around and before she could even realize it she was being pulled into a hug.

She tensed for a moment but eventually had to give in. Spencer was so warm and inviting and safe. She wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled into the space between his shoulder and his neck. She breathes in his scent, something to ground her, to make her remember where she is. Something she can always go home to.

“I-” She started, her voice sounding weak, like she was about to break into a sob.

“Shh…it’s okay. I’ve got you now. We can talk about it later.” Spencer cut her off and began threading his fingers through her hair. She mumbled something that sounded like nothing into his skin but Spencer kept shushing her. Reminding her that she’s safe. After a few moments, Spencer pulled back and held her face in her hands.

“How ‘bout we go to bed? We can talk there, kay?” He suggested, his voice merly above a whisper. All Lily could do was nod.

Spencer nodded too and stood up, now he was completely, stone cold sober and held his hand out to her. Of course, she took it and followed him as he led her to the bedroom. Once they both sat down on the bed, Lily kept her gaze on the floor studying the wooden planks on the floor.

Spencer studied her food a second, her jaw was still clenched and she was biting her lip so hard he was surprised it wasn’t drawing blood yet. He put a reassuring hand on her back, dragging it up and down in warm, repetitive motions.

“Baby, you have to talk to me.” He whispered, trying to find her eyes. She just bit her lip harder and he shook his head.

“Don’t bite your lip, it’ll bleed.” He said. That’s what got Lily to look up. Spencer noticed the unshed tears in her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, his voice soft and low.

“You’re too good for me.” He choked out, not letting her tears fall. Through the tears burning in her eyes, she saw Spencer’s face twist in confusion.

“What?” He asked, softly.

“You’re too good for me. You’re so smart and you're so good at your job and I just…I look stupid standing next to you. I don’t know why you..like me. Why are you with me?” She rambled on, letting one tear slip out of her eyes and running down her cheek.

Spencer immediately shook his head no and wiped her tear with his thumb.

“Baby…no.” He spoke, in all honesty, he really didn’t know what to say. It was just something so absurd that he didn’t even know how to respond.

Lily finally met his eyes, Spencer looked deep into hers. Begging her to understand how much he loves her, how much he wants to be there for her. However, he could see that something didn’t click in her magnificent brain. Spencer cupped both sides of her face, making her eyes stay on him.

“Listen to me.” He prods softly and she doesn't protest.

“You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met and you can’t even deny it. You’ve done things on cases that I wouldn’t think of in a million years. And you’re beautiful, the most beautiful woman I have ever had the pleasure of being with. You’re so perfect.” Lily smiles, partially because the things he said are nice but mostly because Spencer sounds like he’s about to ramble and Lily loves when he rambles.

They stayed like that for a while. Lily’s face in Spencer’s hands, he rambled on and on and on about how much he loves and so on. He went on until they laid down and Lily was in Spencer’s arms, he was still mumbling about how much she loved her and how beautiful she is, constantly kissing her head and running his fingers through her hair until eventually he fell asleep too.

[sagereeid]

scars that never healed. - s.r. - chapter 13

a/n - I may or may not have written this because i need the absolute most comfort imaginable because this week is awful.

Warnings - none just fluff really

The week went by very slow, almost agonizingly so. At least, the case they had to walk into went by somewhat fast. It was pretty simple regarding the other cases they would have to solve that would take them weeks sometimes months on end to solve.

All throughout the week, Spencer and Lily started a new routine. Sunday was the one day Spencer would be at his apartment by himself. He would be there to watch his clothes and pack new ones in his bag and make sure everything was tidy. Then on Monday, he would meet Lily at work and go home with her. He would sleep over that day and go to work with her on Tuesday.

Then, Spencer would split from Lily after work and go to see his mother just like he would any other Wednesday, but he would always go home to her.Lily would always make pasta and tea that day. Which, albeit is a weird combo but it worked for both of them and brought comfort and warmth when it needed to.

And then, Thursday, Friday and Saturday would be the same as it was the day before. Today it was Friday. Spencer’s favorite day. And now, both of them were sitting on the couch, watching some random movie Spencer wasn’t paying attention to. They both had glasses of wine in their hands, occasionally sipping.

The more Spencer drank the more his good judgment went at the window. Lily would tell him about how loppy he would get on Saturday morning. How he would giggle at nothing. How he would just stare at her like she was the greatest thing on Earth. How his brain would reduce to mush when he was wine drunk and looked at her.

He was doing that now, looking at Lily like she was some God that blessed him with her presence. Only this time, she could feel his gaze on him, his eyes burning holes in her skin. Normally she wouldn’t give this a second though, maybe even blush and giggle if she was as wine drunk as him.

Only this day she didn’t. Instead, Lily shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. Spencer noticed this and titled his head. He sobered up for just a moment and took a good look at her for a moment. That’s when he noticed.

Notice her jaw clenched, her iron grip on the wine glass, her eyes focus on nothing more than the T.V. but 12 years of profiling told Spencer something else was on her mind.

“Lils?” He asked softly, putting his hand on her thigh, making her muscles tighten up even more.

“Yes?” She spat out, not on purpose she was just so tense that it felt like there was nothing else she could do.

“Lily, baby, what’s wrong?” He asked. The pet names have become normal at this point, slipping out before he could even think to correct it.

Lily didn’t say anything, she kept her eyes fixed on the T.V. in front of her, she pressed her lips into a line. Spencer sighed and turned off the T.V. to get her attention. She whipped her head around and before she could even realize it she was being pulled into a hug.

She tensed for a moment but eventually had to give in. Spencer was so warm and inviting and safe. She wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled into the space between his shoulder and his neck. She breathes in his scent, something to ground her, to make her remember where she is. Something she can always go home to.

“I-” She started, her voice sounding weak, like she was about to break into a sob.

“Shh…it’s okay. I’ve got you now. We can talk about it later.” Spencer cut her off and began threading his fingers through her hair. She mumbled something that sounded like nothing into his skin but Spencer kept shushing her. Reminding her that she’s safe. After a few moments, Spencer pulled back and held her face in her hands.

“How ‘bout we go to bed? We can talk there, kay?” He suggested, his voice merly above a whisper. All Lily could do was nod.

Spencer nodded too and stood up, now he was completely, stone cold sober and held his hand out to her. Of course, she took it and followed him as he led her to the bedroom. Once they both sat down on the bed, Lily kept her gaze on the floor studying the wooden planks on the floor.

Spencer studied her for a second, her jaw was still clenched and she was biting her lip so hard he was surprised it wasn’t drawing blood yet. He put a reassuring hand on her back, dragging it up and down in warm, repetitive motions.

“Baby, you have to talk to me.” He whispered, trying to find her eyes. She just bit her lip harder and he shook his head.

“Don’t bite your lip, it’ll bleed.” He said. That’s what got Lily to look up. Spencer noticed the unshed tears in her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, his voice soft and low.

“You’re too good for me.” He choked out, not letting her tears fall. Through the tears burning in her eyes, she saw Spencer’s face twist in confusion.

“What?” He asked, softly.

“You’re too good for me. You’re so smart and you're so good at your job and I just…I look stupid standing next to you. I don’t know why you..like me. Why are you with me?” She rambled on, letting one tear slip out of her eyes and running down her cheek.

Spencer immediately shook his head no and wiped her tear with his thumb.

“Baby…no.” He spoke, in all honesty, he really didn’t know what to say. It was just something so absurd that he didn’t even know how to respond.

Lily finally met his eyes, Spencer looked deep into hers. Begging her to understand how much he loves her, how much he wants to be there for her. However, he could see that something didn’t click in her magnificent brain. Spencer cupped both sides of her face, making her eyes stay on him.

“Listen to me.” He prods softly and she doesn't protest.

“You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met and you can’t even deny it. You’ve done things on cases that I wouldn’t think of in a million years. And you’re beautiful, the most beautiful woman I have ever had the pleasure of being with. You’re so perfect.” Lily smiles, partially because the things he said are nice but mostly because Spencer sounds like he’s about to ramble and Lily loves when he rambles.

They stayed like that for a while. Lily’s face in Spencer’s hands, he rambled on and on and on about how much he loves and so on. He went on until they laid down and Lily was in Spencer’s arms, he was still mumbling about how much she loved her and how beautiful she is, constantly kissing her head and running his fingers through her hair until eventually he fell asleep too.