svalewayland

[svalewayland]

this parallel, *chef's kiss*

The Dreamers (2003) dir. Bernardo Bertolucci Venus de Milo by Alexandros of Antioch

[svalewayland]

Eva Green as Isabelle THE DREAMERS (2003) dir. Bernardo Bertolucci

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May start being active here

I may start being active here since I got laid off as part of the company's downsizing strategy three weeks ago, and I'm not coping well. Sorry for the possibly depressive writing incoming.

[svalewayland]

Yearn

I yearn

for a life of freedom

for a life of authenticity

for a life where I can be myself

without worrying about finances

future plans, loans, and retirements.

I yearn for a life of truth,

where who I am at my core,

at the essence of my being, of my heart

is who I am in the world.

I yearn for a simple life,

of quiet time,

of stability,

of nature,

of unrushed love and expression.

But I'm trapped,

a bird with clipped wings on a cage,

The key one I purchase with my soul,

One that vanishes once the powers that be deem it so.

And I yearn,

And I dream,

And I fight just to live.

[svalewayland]

sincerely,

someone who worked with Chinese people for years who didn't use THEIR ACTUAL NAMES because westerns were too fucking self absorbed to find them hard to say and funny.

developed countries with underdeveloped brains istg.

I think by including racially diverse characters with ethnic names in a children's book, JKR was trying to prevent y'all from becoming the kind of adults who make casually racist jokes and point and laugh at real life people's names when they come from a different cultural background than you. Somehow, y'all managed to become those adults anyway while accusing her of the racism you all now openly practice with no remorse. Here is a white male openly mocking a real-life black woman's name and calling the name her black parents gave her "racist". Incredible.

[svalewayland]

It's eating disorder awareness week and this is the kind of content I'd watch. And If I'm being fully honest, that I still watch when life gets to be too much.

Anorexia is one of the deathliest mental illnesses out there, with a treatment that focuses very heavily on weight and a world that won't stop talking about calories, obesity, fitness, etc.

Something most people don't understand is that restriction is like a drug, but the catch is you need food to survive. An addict can go without being near drugs, a person with an eating disorder? Not happening.

I won't talk about binge eating disorders of any kind because I don't have experience, because THEIR voices need to be heard. But I will say, as someone who's dealing with the ever-present whisper at the back of my mind from a restrictive eating disorder, you're lucky if you never got one.

It's quite wild seeing online spaces a decade later, and notice not much has changed. But also that that voice, the one I know too well, says how glad she is things remain the same.

I wish we did better, I wish little girls didn't grow up to want to starve themselves, fill themselves so they don't feel, or whatever it is. I wish because that ship has long sailed for me.

The less you eat the prettier you are.

If you wanted it enough you would ;))

[svalewayland]

*looks at a quarter-full kettle I keep trying to boil*

Bloody hell, no wonder...

I have come up with a better metaphor than “you can’t pour from an empty cup” for burnout. You can’t boil an empty kettle. Pouring from an empty cup just gets you nowhere. Trying to boil an empty kettle can ruin the kettle, the stove, and burn down your house if you keep trying it.

[svalewayland]

Write.

Not because of recognition.

Not because people will tell you they love it.

Not because you'll prove wrong those who claim you're talentless.

Not because you want a publishing deal.

Not because you want to win,

An award, a prize, a best seller, a star.

Write because your soul yearns for the relief of spilling worlds,

and thoughts, words, and feelings

into characters, letters, scenes,

and lines that turn into chapters.

Write for freedom,

write for lightness,

for love and happiness,

for grief and heartache.

Write,

because it soothes you,

because it recharges you,

because you'll never tell a bird not to sing.

[svalewayland]

Forever proud of everyone I've met in fandoms who published their books.

there is truly something so satisfying about seeing a fanfiction author publish their fanfiction to become an actual book like damn their actually accomplishing their dreams and goals

[svalewayland]

And they asked, how come you’re still feeling depressed?

So I said, can’t you see that I’m doing my best?

By their eyes and my eyes,

They often don’t see eye to eye.

And the half full glass and the half empty one,

They love to change sides.

And when it all dries and when it all spills out,

It’s so empty and yet so vast.

But their sight and my sight,

They don’t see colours quite alike.

And their vibrants are my greys,

And my greys don’t always make sense.

So I try,

And try,

And yet we never seem to speak the same language.

The language of the heart.

[svalewayland]

my prince

I just love all his little mouth twitches and movements, he is able to convey so much without saying a word.

[svalewayland]

Reylo - Year of Snake

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im so lonely. ill always be lonely no matter where i am. it hurts so bad, it feels like my stomach is tearing from the inside.

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the truth will always be that there's something fundamentally wrong with me. i was born unloveable. there are two kinds of people in this world: those who love easily and those who are easily loved. i will always be the first. my hands burn from carrying the love i have for everyone. and my heart hurts from knowing that i will never be loved the way i love. as the smiths put it, "i know i'm unloveable, you don't have to tell me. i don't have much in my life, but take it - it's yours."

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My love is always a one side love. Friendships are an one side friendship. I ask to meet up. I ask how they are. I text them. But they never text me back. I am the first one to write.

[svalewayland]

all i have ever wanted is to be loved without asking,

but maybe that is too much to ask. 

[svalewayland]

. . . but I see how little people care. Somehow my story doesn't interest them.

Siri Hustvedt, from The Blazing World