#<- same guy but some may disagree

[transingthoseformers]

Pre-cogged Dee and Megatron double penetrating Optimus’ valve as they keep on whispering him praises about how he’ll be such a good carrier for them,having to inherit both of their sparklings.Whilst fragging the Prime,Megatron bites into Optimus’s neck and licks his sensitive finials,earning lots of erotic whining in return.Compared to Dee,who has a “slight” bit of jealousy,later on copies the same acts in order to stake his claim as well and proceeds to piston OP’s valve a lot quicker when he enjoys hearing out the lovely orgasms filling in the room.

Moaning and continuing to weep in pleasure,the two lustful mechs’ thrusts get faster,rougher when Optimus walls gradually clenches down throughout the fragging session,getting absolutely his valve absolutely obliterated before massive amounts of transfluid flooded his whole gestational chamber and a couple of spit soaking the berth.After recieving lots of aftercare by Dee and Megs(including a handful of kisses around his body),I think Optimus is still going to struggle walk and transform into his vehicle mode for a few days…and I don’t think creating a lie won’t convince Rarchet as to why he’s in that state 🤭

Fascinating

I'm curious as to how they got here

But also 😍😍😍

I am always here for interactions between D-16 and his later self Megatron😌 (though in a threesome situation like here it's gotta be cool)

[everysongineverykey]

read a screen rant article that argued that future knives out movies should feature recurring characters to "flesh out blanc's character" and "make him a more interesting lead" and that "all detectives need a team"........ what if i killed you lol

[lovscb97]

tags: step-brother!park jongseong x fem!reader, d/s dynamics, dom!jay x sub!reader, manipulation lowkey?, implied male masturbation, kissing, oral sex (f. receiving), dirty talk, use of nicknames (baby, princess, jjongie, etc), degradation (slut, whore, etc), spit kink, begging, daddy kink, unprotected sex (plz don’t), breeding kink, choking, praise kink, creampie, fluff and uncertainty at the end, etc

wc: 4.12k

add. notes: ok i know i said i would Not upload soon much less written work either but guess who lied!!! no but fr my mood was pretty terrible yst morning bcs of some stupid classmates not contributing to group work but u know what i had food n ice cream w my friend n i felt a bit better at the least. it still doesn’t excuse their actions but ya anyways bcs of my peace of mind n bcs i finished my part for my presentation, i present to u a Very long stepbro jay fic hehe.. some parts or sentences may look familiar but that's cus i acc sent them to a blog here as anon messages LMFAO but yea i hope u guys enjoy :3 icon creds to @/purinkiss btw!

. . . 

ever since your parents’ divorce, your entire world shattered. it only got worse when your dad announced he’d be bringing home a new woman, much less one who had a child the same age as you. of course, you disagreed at first, throwing harsh words at him up until the point he forced you to meet the delinquent, dragging you by the arm to the restaurant where you were to have dinner with whoever these random people who were about to become part of your small family circle were. you’d even made a firm promise to yourself to not entertain them and to be petty, whether that translated through snide remarks or rolling your eyes, and you swear you really were going to go through with it—

that is, until you met jay.

jay was nothing like you’d imagined him to be. in your head, your new, soon-to-be stepbrother was an ugly, rude and snobby brat who didn’t give two cents about joining your family, the jay you met in reality though? everything but that. he was sweet, and polite, and absolutely fucking gorgeous; blonde hair swept back with a strand falling over his forehead, lean shoulders outlined in the tight fitting black shirt he’d decided to wear for the occasion, and a smile worth a thousand bucks or even dying for. any words that were previously on the tip of your tongue died down when he took your hand in his to shake it, the soft feel of his skin and his bright grin making your insides positively melt and the thoughts of your parents split dissipate within seconds. 

your stepbrother’s attitude and good looks carried through the months you spent with him too. if anything, it became even more reinforced with him taking care of you whenever you needed him. he’d handle sharp objects for you while making your favourite food, hold your hand on the street if you had to cross the road, carry your bags when they got too heavy, rush in front of the door to open it for you, and so, so much more. you were at a privilege to be able to watch him walk around with nothing but a simple shirt and sweatpants around the house too, shamelessly raking your eyes over his attractive features and boring them into his back when he leaned over the stovetop to cook you ramen. 

part of you felt like a perv, for behaving this way and finding him good looking even if he objectively was. you knew it wasn’t like you could help it, you had eyes and they obviously saw what was in front of you, but you tried shoving it down anyways. it also didn’t help that jay constantly hovered around you and made your relationship out to be so.. domestic. he’d narrow his eyes when he caught you talking on the phone to your friends about your latest hook-up, lecturing you on the use of safe sex and how college boys were no good for you until you were red in the face with embarrassment, or he’d offer for the both of you to hang out together after classes ended for you every other day, draping a blanket over your figures and scooching in close to you up until you could feel his body heat radiating off of him. your dad and his new wife thought nothing of it despite your mind spinning, cooing over how well you two got along and relishing in the fact that their children were such good siblings already.

oh, if only they were aware of the twisted fantasies swirling in jongseong’s mind.

because from the minute jay saw you, he knew he had to have you. your pretty face, your soft-spoken voice, and of course, your fucking body. he felt like he was about to lose his damn mind when he first saw you walk around the house in nothing but skimpy shorts and that stupid pink top that left nothing up to the imagination. to an extent, it almost felt like you were teasing him on purpose, especially when he’d find you seated on the couch with your exposed thighs and the subtle dip of your cleavage peeking through the measly clothes that practically coaxed him to sport a hard-on right then and there. it’d be the dead of night when he’d finally find some relief after a day of watching you parade around the kitchen, wondering what it would feel like to grip your hair in a makeshift ponytail and pull your nose flush to his pelvis with him nestled deep inside your throat. and it was only when jongseong came all over his hand and sheets for the nth time after fantasising about you that he realised he needed to do something about this, whether that went against his moral compass or not.

it started with light touches. 

jay would grasp your shoulder to move past you when you were in the way, barely mumbling an ‘excuse me’ to alert you of his presence so you wouldn’t practically jump out of your skin when he did so. his hand would linger in yours for a second too long when he tried not losing you in crowds, gently commanding you to stay close to him in that stern tone of his that made your panties stick to you. it was common etiquette, you thought, he was just doing his job as a brother would normally do for his sister, but the only thing in jongseong’s mind was to make you let down your guard, let it down so much that he could swoop in at the perfect time to take advantage of it. he knew it was wrong, so sinister and dark to want to fuck his own stepsister to the point the only way he could get it up was to the thought of you, but jay didn’t care about any of that at this point, far too fucked out in his own head to think of having eyes for anyone but you.

and as expected, all throughout this, you didn’t suspect a thing. how could you? jay was so perfect, so well-mannered and so attentive. he listened to you rant about anything trivial in your life and drove you around when you wanted to meet up with your girls. he’d wake up late at night if you had a bad dream, consoling you even through the sight of your tears making him worked up, and rub your back softly when you needed to be taken care of. he’d let you sneak back in the house after you’d told your dad you were going out to the library to study, making up excuses for you when your lies fell short. he had your back, and in turn, you had his, so you would’ve never thought of him as anything but a gentleman and big brother.

until everything he did grew into more. 

until having an arm behind your carseat while looking into the rearview mirror turned into placing his hand on your thigh, inches away from the seam of your skirt. until sitting next to him while watching a movie with a shared blanket turned into him nuzzling against you under the covered fabric. until having dinner with both your parents present at the dinner table turned into his foot grazing against yours ever so slightly.

until your honey-like voice calling out for him to help you get the glass on the top cabinet turned into full blown moans of you getting eaten out on the living room couch, echoing throughout the empty house because of-fucking-course, your parents were out for the night on a dinner date.

you weren’t even sure how it happened. one minute, you were struggling to reach on your tippy toes, your mouth instinctively moving to utter jay’s name because he was the only one besides you at home who could help out, but the next, he was pressing up against you to the point of grinding himself into your ass, causing you both to inhale sharply. you vaguely recall turning around, ready to ask what your stepbrother was doing when you’d caught sight of his darkened eyes, practically eyeing you like a piece of meat. and by the time anything even registered in your mind, his lips were already on yours, and his hand was dragging you over to the couch in record time.

“j-jay, we shouldn’t be doing this.” you stuttered out, your voice meek and quiet as you tried not to roll your eyes back at the sight of him slurping up your juices. he didn’t respond, instead opting to move his mouth up to focus on your clit, sucking it into the hot cavern and rolling his tongue against it to the point it had you seeing stars. you knew it was wrong, going against so many moral standpoints and rules, but god did it feel so good. you quickly came to understand that the jay who was going down on you currently was nothing like the jay who engages with you in your day to day life. that jay is gentle, well-meaning and answers all your questions despite how dumb they may seem. but this jay? he’s fucking filthy, messy to the point you can tell your juices are dribbling down his chin.

“fuck, you taste so good.” he gasps out when he finally decides to pull away. “thought about this so much when jerking off.” your eyes widen at his crude admittance, and you know you really should be disgusted at it, but something about the idea of jay being alone in the darkness of his room, hand wrapped around himself while saying your name under his breath only makes you wet, even more so than you already are. at the back of your mind, something screams at you to stop, but you’ve already gotten a taste of what your stepbrother can provide you, and you’d be damned if you didn’t stick around to find out more about it. 

“this is wrong.” you quietly admit anyways, even if it’s not what you want to say. but jay just hums, leaning down to hover above your figure as his arms cage you in underneath him, doing very little to help the fact of how much smaller you feel below him. his lips ghost the shell of your ear as you shiver at the proximity between you two, and he gently nips at it, leaving you biting your tongue to hold back the noises you long yearn to let out. “i know it is, baby, but doesn’t it feel so fucking good?” jay questions with a low chuckle, pulling away to cock his head to the side. you curse internally at the way the nickname sounds coming from him, a dust of light pink spreading across your cheeks because fuck, how can someone be so alluring at all times?

“don’t you want to feel even better, princess?” jay’s voice draws you out, and you hold back a moan at the way he grinds his clothed bulge against your bare opening, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s slowly convincing you over to the dark side. “don’t you want your big brother to spread this pussy open and fuck it ‘till you’re crying from how good it feels?” you almost nod, trying to resist the urge to buck your hips up to catch the sensation of his lower region against you once more. instead, you choose to turn your face away from his striking gaze staring you down, but jay just grips your jaw and turns you to face him once more, the action only making your insides swirl with delight.

“still, what if your mom and my dad find out?” you mumble, and jay just grins wickedly. he swoops in, dipping his head down to capture your lips in a searing kiss that makes you giddy with joy, sneaking his tongue past the opening of your mouth to lick into it. when he pulls back, there’s a thin line of spit connection you both, prompting you to squirm at the sight to which jay’s chest rumbles with laughter. “you’re so fucking cute, y’know that? been dreaming of having your pretty body underneath me since i met you.” he admits lowly, your wide eyes only spurring him on further. “wanna know what i think?” you slowly nod, unsure of where this is going. jay’s voice drops an octave lower as he leans in close and whispers—

“i think you’re a dirty, little slut who deserves to get fucked by her big brother.”

you can’t help the whimper that escapes you at his words this time, and that’s all the confirmation jay needs to sit up and tear off his shirt, bringing to life all the fantasies you’ve had about his body this entire time. you can’t stop yourself from reaching out a hand to touch him, nails grazing across the ridges of his toned stomach and the dip of his v-line that’s hiding the very thing you’ve been craving under his sweatpants. meanwhile, jay just watches you with lust swirling in his orbs, a small smirk playing at his swollen lips as he takes in the picture of your innocent little face ogling his figure. “you like what you see, don’t you, pretty?” he murmurs, biting his lip at the way you nod in shame. “don’t worry.” jay grunts, standing momentarily to loop his fingers inside the edges of his pants. “you’ll get what you’re craving real soon.” he winks before he’s yanking the only thing separating you both down, exposing himself in all his glory to your awaiting eyes at last. 

“goddamnit, it’s pretty.” you think to yourself when your eyes finally settle on your stepbrother’s dick. the tip is an angry shade of red, dribbling with a few beads of precum that your face falls at when jay swipes them away with his thumb as he wraps his large hand around himself. your disappointment is short-lived, however, because he’s back on top of you soon, holding the very same thumb up to your awaiting mouth to taste, to which you eagerly wrap your lips around, the salty flavour of him invading your senses. “good girl.” jongseong commends as you suckle at the tip of his finger, the praise going straight to your core. he pulls his hand away from you after a short while, that same wet thumb snaking its way down to find your clit and pressing against it, which does nothing but rip a noise of satisfaction from you. jay continues to rub at your engorged nub, his gaze fixated on the sight of your pussy as if he’s trying to commit it to memory.

“shit. i can’t wait any more.” he growls after another second, retracting his hand to wrap it around himself instead, pumping once or twice before he’s pressing the head against your awaiting entrance. you watch with bated breath as he rubs against your folds, slicking up with your oozing juices until your patience starts wearing thin. “jay,” you huff after a minute, legs kicking up in frustration as your stepbrother glances at you teasingly. “what do you want, angel? use your big girl words and tell me.” he smiles, almost innocent to the point you even forget the compromising position you’re both in.

“want.. want you.” you admit shyly, averting your eyes to a forgotten corner in the room as jay tsk’s. “look at me when you speak, whore.” he spits out, his entire demeanour changing in an instant. it only makes you leak even more, and you swallow thickly, eyes pleading. “please fuck me, please. wan’ you to do what you said, spreading me open and using me until i cry, please, please, please. jjongie, daddy, please, i—“

you don’t even get the chance to finish because by the time both the nickname and title leave your mouth, jay has long lost his composure, instantly pushing inside you as he attempts to bottom out his large cock. he hisses at the way your warm walls envelop him, and the only thing you can do is cry out at the way you’re being stretched out to your limit, finally having the emptiness inside you satiated with the presence of your stepbrother’s dick. “fuuuck, that’s it, look at this tiny, little hole sucking me in.” jay curses, and you flare red in embarrassment at his nasty words, ignoring the way they only make you gush around him even more. 

“i’m going to absolutely ruin you, baby.” is the only thing jay says before he’s pulling out and slamming himself back into you, leaving you to cry out as his mushroom tip instantly hits that one spot deep inside. his thrusts are erratic, filled with a fervour none of the other guys you’ve ever slept with had, and you think the way he’s fucking you now is definitely going to rectify his promise of fucking you until you’re crying, the occasion seeming to be very well on its way of happening. 

“fuck, there is no way this is the last time we’re doing this.” jay groans, the noise of skin slapping and your moans echoing throughout the living room as he continues absolutely drilling you. each drag of his cock drives into you with sheer power and raw desire to completely destroy you it seems, and you’re sure nobody is ever going to top it. “gonna use you everywhere, every time i please. you want that too, don’t you? tell me you do, princess. tell me and daddy will fuck you like he means it every single time.” he blurts out. the only way you can respond is through incoherently mumbling and the nodding of your head, far too dazed out already at the way your stepbrother is pounding into you, which only draws a breathy laugh from jay. “seems i’ve fucked you dumb already, huh? cock that good? so good it’s got my baby all dumb?” he taunts. you only whine at his words, drool spilling out from the side of your lips which jay wipes off with a chuckle.

“i’m already close, god.” he sighs, his movements unrelenting and balls tightening with the way they slap against your ass. “want me to cum inside you? for daddy to breed this pussy full? maybe i should do it and make you walk around with my seed lodged deep in your messy cunt.” jay hisses, his hand snaking it ways to your neck as he continues talking. “bet you’d like that ‘cause you’re a filthy fucking bitch. letting your stepbrother fuck your tight cunt as he pleases.” slender fingers wrap around the skin and tighten their grip slightly to restrict your airflow, and that’s all it takes to abruptly push you over the edge, leaving you dropping your mouth open in a silent scream as you cum. jay continues fucking you through your high, making out your small mewls amongst the lewd sounds of his cock shoving into your hole. 

“good girl, good fucking girl. did so well for me, came so much all for daddy. you’re so, so good to me, princess. fuck, i love you.” jay blabbers as he lets go of your neck, too lost in chasing his own peak to even realise what he’s just admitted. you don’t catch it fully either in your haze of overstimulation that he continues to fuck you through, but some unconscious part of you mutters it back as best as you can somehow. jay’s heart swells at the way you take him, so small and pliant for him to just use for his own good, and he leans in to smash his lips against yours, drinking in your loud sounds as his movements start to falter with his upcoming release washing over him. 

“just a bit more, pretty, just a bit. such a good fucking girl for daddy, letting him use your body, fuck. i’m gonna cum deep inside you, angel. gonna reward you with my cum. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? like me to creampie this precious hole?” jay stammers out, the coil in his stomach close to snapping. he’s not sure how much longer he can keep up his exterior, sweat dripping down his forehead and closed eyes as his tired hips continue ramming his cock into you. he feels you wrap your arms around his neck, cracking his orbs open to find your fucked out face mumbling for his cum, your legs wrapping against his waist to keep him locked into you. 

“cum in me, daddy, please cum in me. wan’ your cum, i’ll take it like a good girl. please, daddy.” you babble, and that’s all it takes to send jay over the edge too, loud groans leaving his mouth as he shoots thick ropes of white inside your walls, painting them with his release. he cums for what feels like forever, holding your body close to his as his cock throbs inside your spasming cunt that’s still greedily sucking him in, urging him to fill you up. he finally stops after seemingly a good minute, panting against your neck where he’s buried his face into as he lets the post-orgasm bliss wash over himself.

“fuck,” jay heaves a breath once he’s finally recovered, making sure to use his softening cock to keep you plugged up in fear his cum will drip down and stain the couch, much less make your scandalous activities known to both your parents. he knows he’s going to have to face the reality of everything soon, but for now, he chooses to ignore it, propping himself up with an arm as he takes a look at your tired face that’s still so beautiful even after he basically fucked you within an inch of your life.

“you okay?” he asks softly after a while, prompting you to open your eyes and look up at him. there’s so much love and adoration in them that it makes jay feel all gooey inside, and when you nod with a small smile on your lips, he can’t help but lean back in and kiss you, desperately wishing this won’t be the last time he feels your mouth on his. “you think we made a mess?” you wonder out loud with a giggle once he’s pulled away, and jay just laughs breathlessly at you, brushing a strand of loose hair out of your face to take a proper look. “i’ll clean it up if so, don’t worry, baby.” he reassures in a quiet voice, leaving you to hum in agreement as a response.

“jay.” 

“hm?”

“..what now?” 

jay inhales when you bring forth the question he doesn’t have an answer to, looking down at you to find your worried expression staring back at him. he coos when you jut out your bottom lip, brushing a thumb against your cheek smoothly as he sighs. “don’t worry about that now, princess. just sleep.” he murmurs. 

he can tell you’re not entirely satisfied with his admission, and that you want to say something more, but even if you do, you choose not to, instead opting to follow his advice and shutting your eyes by letting the fatigue from what you’d just been through take over your body. jongseong watches as you slowly close off your thoughts and mind, gently resting his body weight on top of you in favour of pulling you closer. he tries to avoid thinking of the inevitable that’ll come to wake him up, but he’ll deal with that later, choosing to bask in this moment with you for as long as he can before he has to face reality. instead, he presses a small kiss to your cheek, nuzzling it with his nose before closing his own eyes. he eventually drifts off to dreamland, where his thoughts will still be filled with your face.

. . . 

comments and reblogs are always appreciated! <3

[randomshyperson]

I'll Keep You Warm - Wanda Maximoff Oneshots

summary: During a mission, Wanda needs to keep warm, and there's no one better suited for the job than a demigod with fire powers.

words: 2.701k | warnings: this is not explicit at all but there's undressing and some innuendos, actually super fluff, friends (rivals) with mutual pining, attempt at humor (sometimes I think I'm funny), takes place after civil war, reader actually have the same personality as johnny storm because he's the only fire powered character I could think of while writing.

A/N-> Honestly, this was entirely based on the scene of Jacob warming up Bella in Twilight. It was requested as a challenge by @abimess about three years ago, and it's finally here. Never stop believing your request will see the light of the day guys (does this expression exist in English as well?)

General Masterlist | AO3 | Wattpad |

-&-

Stake out missions are always a pain, but there's a code among the Avengers, and that's why instead of relaxing on some paradise island, you're in Siberia, collecting evidence for Natasha Romanoff.

To be fair, this was more of a favor to Nat than an Avengers duty, since the team was currently on a political tightrope, with half the people here and half somewhere else, with government contracts between them and councils all over the world. In the midst of all this mess, Natasha had discovered that the Red Room was not only operational, but also had a hundred thousand widows out there. The operation to locate and rescue these women was understaffed, and well, that's how you ended up in the Siberian winter with a grumpy witch and a synthezoid.

It turns out that the revelation that the Red Room was still operating was the exact kind of argument that the Avengers could use to exist, only super spies like Nat or Clint could find the widows, and well, only people like you, and the other Avengers could deal with that kind of power and influence. So while Natasha took care of the bureaucratic part, you and the others helped with everything else.

Stark and Cap were somewhere in Peru, and you envied a little the reconnaissance pictures that Tony sent to the group that contained the most beautiful tourist landscapes he visited with the justification of 'you never know where a black widow might be hiding' while you froze your ass with the people who liked you the least on the team.

Well, Vision didn't like you. In the same quantity as you hated him.

Wanda is a special case. You like to annoy her because she's really cute when she's mad, and she, although she's probably the most powerful person on the team and has full capacity to do so, has never put a definitive end to any of your torments towards her.

It was more of a game of teasing and friendly rivalry than mutual hatred.

The only thing you really disagreed on was the strange relationship she had with Vision, which always made you cross some line and say something stupid that would make her angry for weeks.

And it was also the reason you had offered to keep watch in the snow outside the hideout, while the two of them were safe and warm inside.

But only a few hours into the mission - Steve had already confirmed his status, as had Sam, who was in France, also having a great time as a tourist - when your slumber was interrupted by the sudden appearance of Vision, making you jump a little from the wooden chair.

"I wasn't sleeping!" You exclaimed immediately, to which the robot only sighed in reprimand, without comment. As you adjusted your posture and forced the sleep away, he stepped away from the canvas of the tent he had just crossed and cleared his throat.

"I require your assistance, Miss L/N." He begins, making you look at him in surprise.

The formal way Vision speaks always seems strange to you. You laugh shortly, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Do you now, huh?"

That damn proud robot doesn't lose his composure under your irony. 

"As you may have noticed, the temperature has dropped considerably." 

You hum at his words, shrugging.  "I didn't, actually. Perks of being a demigod, I guess."

Vision sighs impatiently. "Well, the human in the group is cold." He explains grumpily, and you laugh in confusion.

"Sorry, I thought you were the one taking care of that, microwave." You retort, remembering well how Wanda, who must have been wearing three different coats the last time you two talked, grumbled the whole way about the snow, and how Vision seemed so pleased with himself when he offered to keep her warm with the heating function of his metal body.

So it was strange to see him standing there, begrudgingly asking for help.

"I was." He grumbles. "But my body... well, it overheated. I can't keep it that high heat for too long without damaging myself. Unlike you, of course. So I thought-"

"That I would save the day?" You interrupt, feigning some disinterest and then sighing. "Well, I don't know, I don't feel like a hero tonight." You sigh again, glazing him through the corner of your eye. "Maybe if you say please."

He chuckles incredulously. "You want me to beg you to save a teammate's life?" He retorts indignantly. "Maybe I should just report on your attitude. I'm sure Miss Romanoff will be happy to know what we've been wasting our energy on instead of the mission. Ridiculous arguments and-"

You burst out laughing, gesturing. "Dude, you need to lighten up. I'm obviously joking." You cut him off, standing up. "Take my watch. I'll keep your girlfriend warm."

If Vision could blush with anger, he probably would. He huffs, giving you room to get inside the tent.

"Just so you know, Miss Maximoff and I don't have that kind of relationship," he grudgingly clarifies, and you almost get the impression that this is something Wanda has asked him to do whenever someone - you - assumes differently.

You laugh, irony dripping onto your tongue as you retort, "I'm so sorry to hear that." And you imitate the sounds of fireworks and cheering, escaping a push from Vision to slip into the tent.

Even with your powers, it was easy to see how cold and damp it was in there. The tent, while spacious, didn't have much ability to accumulate heat from the fire pit outside or the small wood heater in the corner of the room, and almost all of your attitude disappeared when you caught a glimpse of the shivering figure on the camping mat.

Almost.

"Fear no more, Maximoff, your knight in shining armor is here." You teased, earning a small laugh from her.

Wanda adjusted herself to make room for you on the mattress. "Shut up, and get over here already."

Despite moving immediately, you retort, “Bossy,” which only makes her hide a smile against the pillow.

It should have been awkward, cuddling with a teammate, but as you adjusted and hugged her, it was only hard to ignore how Wanda seemed to have been molded for you. She fit perfectly against your body, and you tried not to blush at the sigh of relief she let out as she snuggled into your warmth.

“Thank you.” She sighed, eyes closed, hands moving inside your jacket. 

Your arms were around her, legs intertwined beneath the blanket that was no longer needed, and you didn’t trust your voice much to say more than a hoarse:  “Don’t mention it.”

A moment of silence passes, and then another. Your thoughts wander between Wanda, the Avengers, and what Natasha would say about how you’ve chosen to spend your time. Maybe Vis is right, and you’ve wasted enough moments that being used as a human heater is your only way to keep Wanda close. Maybe it’s too late to be anything else.

The silence stretches longer, and you almost think Wanda has fallen asleep, and you’re almost considering doing the same, when she groans.

“You’re being loud.”

Opening your mouth to defend yourself because you’re sure you haven’t said a word in the last few minutes, you shut yourself up before you do, as you realize the telepath snuggled against your chest was surely talking about another kind of noise. You snort lightly, folding your arms behind your head. The lack, even a little, of the warmth of one of them on her shoulders makes her groan in protest.

“If you weren’t nosy, you wouldn’t hear a thing.”

You snap back rudely, but Wanda chuckles, quite comfortable moving one of her hands inside your shirt. Your skin is considerably warmer without a fabric between you two, and it makes her hum in satisfaction.

"Yes, that's better." She whispers sleepily, hiding her face in the crook of your neck. The position becomes less and less platonic with each adjustment Wanda makes, but you would never complain.

You try to relax with so much contact - it's especially difficult now that you can smell Wanda's shampoo so directly, almost intoxicating all your senses with it. - And you're almost getting used to the sensation, when she grumbles dissatisfied.

"Why am I still cold?" There's a soft scratch of her nails against your lower back that makes you clear your throat and think of anything other than the sensation, in scenarios very different from this one.

You consider mumbling something about it being too cold outside for her to warm up in five minutes, and telling her to stop moving and wait a bit, but Wanda tries to repeat the skin-to-skin idea from before by adjusting herself so that she's practically all over you, both hands under your shirt. And that makes you jump in fright.

"Wow, slow down there, tigress." You scoff, really embarrassed now, and Wanda raises an eyebrow at the color in your cheeks - which increases considerably when she sits against your hips, hovering over you.

She looks at you with some curiosity, a smile playing on her lips. You have the impression that her eyes glow red for a second before she retorts:

"Don't act like this isn't your dream come true." She teases, half-joking and half-serious, you can only swallow hard as you stare into her eyes.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." You retort, well aware that a quick peek into your mind would tell Wanda that you know exactly what she's talking about.

But despite her skills, she's either too tired or too cold to do nothing more than let out a short laugh and roll her eyes.

"Can you stop thinking about dirty things for a second and help me out?" She grumbles, and you'll probably agree with anything this woman says while she's on top of you. She starts to take off her sweatshirt, and you forget how to breathe. Your expression brings a blush to her cheeks, but she doesn't lose her composure. "Stop it."

Yep, she can definitely hear your thoughts.

You clear your throat, adjusting yourself to cover your face with your arm, and block that sinful image before you.

"You stop." Is your answering grunt, to which Wanda gives a tense chuckle. "What the hell is this now? Undressing on my lap."

Wanda, who has already discarded all her sweaters on the floor, rolls her eyes. You're not looking, but she seems to be having a great time.

"You don't pay attention to anything, do you?" She retorts, and sighs to herself when she realizes that with all the movement, she now can see part of your abs exposed by the shirt. The anatomy of the gods was something really unfair and hard to ignore and Wanda is grateful that you are covering your eyes, because she can hide her own reaction from you.

"I pay attention to too many things if you ask me." You mumble, but Wanda ignores your answer, busy removing her shirt. With a sports bra being the only thing covering her torso now, she moves her hands to the edge of your jacket. With the gentle tug, you startle again, and stare at her in shock when you realize her lack of clothes. "F-for Odin, what the hell-"

"I need skin-to-skin warmth, you perv." She retorts firmly, even though her face is burning. You stammer in amazement, unable to look away from the cleavage in front of you—which is too close when Wanda pushes your jacket off. “You didn’t pay attention in any of those survival classes they organized for us, did you?” She insists on making conversation, but you’re mumbling sincerely:

“I don’t think I’d know my name right now if you asked me.” Wanda chuckles, rolling her eyes. Your jacket falls down your back, and she reaches for the hem of your shirt. 

“Take it off.” 

“Won't even take me to dinner first, Maximoff?” You scoff, even though you’re complying. Wanda loses a bit of confidence at your exposure, clearing her throat when she realizes she’s staring.

She ignores her own reaction, looking away as she explains; “You probably don’t understand this because you’re not entirely human, but it’s really cold right now. I just need a little more warmth.” 

You smile at her, moving your hands to her hips, making Wanda sigh as you start to play with the knot of her sweatpants. “Are you really going to take it all off, Maximoff? I knew you were hardcore, but damn…” 

She groans in embarrassment, for the first time that night. Covering her face with her hands, you laugh at the sight. “This would be so much easier if you didn’t keep thinking the things you’re thinking.” She mutters. “It’s so annoying.” 

You laugh, tugging at the knot so it comes loose. The slight slack in her sweatpants that allows you to see more of her hips makes you sigh. “Well, I’m still fifty percent human. No one is ironclad against a pretty girl on their lap. Oh, wait, your boyfriend is.”

Wanda takes her hands away from her face to hold your wrists away from her hips but still in your lap. "Vision isn't my boyfriend." 

You narrow your eyes at her suspiciously. "But he's something." She hesitates, letting go of your wrists. 

"Yeah, just like you are." She murmurs, taking you by surprise. She sighs then, adjusting her hair. "Friends, roommates, teammates. It doesn't matter what you call it."

You smile. "How about... personal heater?"

She laughs, shaking her head. "Shut up and take off your pants."

Despite the raised eyebrow, you don't say anything else. There's a pull apart, so that the two of you can strip down to your underwear. You do that fairly quickly, because even with your powers, you can feel how cold Wanda's skin is now.

But once you're settled under the covers again, Wanda can breathe a sigh of relief. She resists the urge to dig her nails into your back, feeling your body covering hers, and now skin to skin, the temperature rises much more quickly.

You’re also kind enough to emit more heat, and Wanda can’t resist hiding her face against your neck when your arms wrap around her completely. 

It’s a very tender moment between you. Wanda doesn’t want to think about how vulnerable she is, trusting you completely to keep her alive. And she also doesn’t want to think about how much better this feels than anything she’s ever felt. The safety inside your arms leaves her breathless. Suddenly, she finds herself asking; “Did you really mean all the things you were thinking?” 

You laugh shortly, your fingers moving to caress her hair and Wanda can’t help the gasp that escapes her lips at the sensation. “I don’t want to have this conversation while you’re having a hypothermia episode, Maximoff.” 

“I’m not—” 

“I paid attention in survival classes.” You interrupt her. "One of the most common signs of hypothermia is confusion, and one of the desperate actions people tend to have is to remove all clothing. You're lucky I can warm you up so quickly."  She says nothing to that, finally realizing that she's stopped shivering, and her thoughts are much clearer than before. She's no longer desperate to get warm, because she's not cold at all now. Wanda is ready to thank you, when you add, "Of course, there are still ways to warm you up even more..."

You move your head, and playfully bite her cheek, making her squirm with laughter before pinching you on the corners. You're still laughing when she turns inside your embrace, pouting but not pulling away from you.

With your arms firmly around her, you adjust your mouth to her ear.

“Go to sleep, you need to.” You whisper, smiling at the way she tries to hide her body’s reactions from you. “I’ll keep you warm through the night.”

She reaches out to intertwine her hand with yours, and rest it on top of her stomach. When you two finally fall asleep, you have matching smiles on your faces.

[unpassive-viewer]

Watching breaking in the olympics has been awesome as a former hip hop dancer, but holy shit. For every person who doesn't know how breaking even works and doesn't think it's a sport, there's ten more who are excited about the men's competition, but absolutely ragging on the women's competitors. My head is actually spinning.

If you don't know about breaking, I need to explain some things:

The breakers all know one another already, and all respect each other. This includes between the m&f categories. Nicka (silver medalist - women's) and Phil Wizard (gold medalist - men's) have literally competed as a duo.

The breakers that you think "are better than everyone in the finals" already went through the qualifying trials. They also compete with all the medalists, they also tried out for the olympic teams. They did not make it.

To that end, every battle is its own battle. They may have done poorly in the qualifying trials, but have beaten the now-gold medalists in other competitions. It's not like swimming where Katy Ledecky will pummel everyone else in the race unless she has an exceptionally off day.

Related to point 2 - breaking was born in the Bronx. It was also born in the 1970s. Being mad that the demographics don't reflect who you think should be dancing, or being mad that the dance isn't "in touch with its roots" is like being mad that someone modified the recipe for ginger beef. Some of the guys who were competing today are old enough that they were dancing with the same people who invented the sport. I promise that they have crazy respect for how it began and all of its influences.

Related to point 3 - breaking requires originality. It is a foundational element of the sport to evolve and be creative. It's a sport, but it's also an art form.

Dancing for three rounds in three separate battles is a lot for any dancer. If you think some of them looked like shit toward the end (I disagree, but whatever) it's because they are tired. Not to mention there were heat warnings in Paris! They still have more athletic ability in their left pinky finger than I've ever had in my whole body - and I was someone who also did street dance!

The music wasn't decided ahead of time, but the DJs were playing very very popular breaking songs. All of the competitors already know how they go, so if they were scoring low in musicality, it's not because they panicked not knowing the song.

The athletes have sets made up already, they're not freestyling. They adapt them to the music, but unless they blank in the middle of the competition, they already know which skills they want to show off. (I'm editing to clarify that some of them did freestyle, but for the most part it was after they felt like they'd done what was going to get them points)

I really doubt that anyone on tumblr is going to care, but Instagram users can't read and YouTube is full of bots. I'm so excited that I got to watch my sport in the Olympics, but my lord people cannot behave.

[soleta]

rank every dr who on how likely they are to eat rocks

Hm which number should I go by? Let's go from least to most. I'll rank the TV Doctors and then reblog to give you general opinions on the others.

16th place - 3rd Doctor

You may disagree with this because his scientific mind might conceive of a situation where eating rocks could possibly be an option. However Liz would hit him on the nose with a newspaper like a dog if he got anywhere near her rocks. She would at length scold him and tell him that most rocks are bad for you and you shouldn't eat them.

15th place - War Doctor

He would definitely eat rocks but not for pleasure. When you are stranded on a planet because of woke war you may have to eat some rocks. But he would hate it the whole time.

14th place - 9th Doctor

Similar to War Doctor but you know what he kinda sees it. He kinda gets the appeal. I think he ate one (1) rock during his life and Rose was like Why and he was just nodding to himself like "Yeah this has a certain something".

13th place - 12th Doctor

He would eat some rocks on occaission but it would be like his guilty pleasure and he would hide it from Clara.

12th place - 7th Doctor

If there was ever a way he could incorporate eating some rocks into one of his 5D chess plans he would do it. Afterwards Ace would give him the side eye and be like "Professor this could have all worked out without you eating any of those rocks" and he would boop her on the nose and say nothing.

11th place - 6th Doctor

He would NOT eat rocks you are being RIDICULOUS. And then he finds a new rock on some planet and it smells so good and then he would take a nibble and get absolutely addicted to eating them. He would spend the next 40 years always having pebbles in his pocket to snack on and all regenerations after him would lowkey barf when someone offered them one of those rocks because of how much he used to eat them.

10th place - 13.5th Doctor

He would eat rocks just to fuck with Yaz and be quirky but his heart wouldn't be in it.

9th place - 10th Doctor

Someone would offer him something suspiciously rock shaped and he would eat it and be like "This is amazing, what is it?" and they would be like it's a rock and 10 would be like huh.

8th place - 14th Doctor

Same as above but he knows now he likes the taste of rocks. However his recent experiences made him less privy to them. He had too many.

7th place - 2nd Doctor

He would eat rocks in a heartbeat but he doesn't really like them. Like he will do it but his heart doesn't yearn for rocks. He would just do it to be silly and/or make people think hes not a threat and just some weird guy who eats rocks.

6th place - 5th Doctor

Sometimes he will pick up a rock and say what type of rock it is and eat it. And then Nyssa has to hold Tegan back lest she hit him.

5th place - 1st Doctor

Ian sees him eat a rock and is dumbfounded. He asks "Doctor, what are you doing?" and the Doctor will try to gaslight him into thinking HE is the weird one for thinking that him eating a rock is strange. And then he would laugh his old man laugh. He also sometimes eats rock flavoured food cubes from the food machine. Just cause.

4th place - 15th Doctor

He would see a rock, pick it up, laugh and jump with joy and enthusiastically ask Ruby "Do you know what this is?" and she would be like "Uh-" and he would cut her off to say "This is a rock!" and eat it.

3rd place - 8th/11th Doctor

They would both eat rocks and others who see them would be like "Yeah ok checks out". Like no one is surprised they just accept it.

(Both pics = them when they see an uneaten rock)

2nd place - 4th Doctor

Those teeth were made for rock chompin'. If 4 had to defeat an alien monster made of rock he would just eat it, and no matter which companion would be there to witness it they would all be changed forever. He would just carry on like it didn't happen.

1st place - 13th Doctor

She will see a rock and be like "is anyone gonna eat this" and not wait for an answer.

[mayaree-darling]

In the End, It's Still You // Sung Jinwoo and Liu Zhigang

Pairing: AshbornVessel!Sung Jinwoo x ReincarnatedLover!Reader x Monarch(?)Liu Zhigang

Synopsis: It’s him, you would just have to see him and you would know it’s him. You would know his soul. In whatever world, whatever body. You would know your lover and he would know you - and you would have the eternity you swore to one another. Jinwoo disagrees.  

From Mayaree: Can you guys tell I miss writing for Vessel!Characters? (Hi, Sukuna!) Anyways, if you didn’t see the post, I kept getting notifs for the small Jinwoo fic I wrote (understandably, season 2 is out and he’s hot af) but I think I’ve let you guys have too much fun. Also, if there are too many plot holes: lmao. I just needed to get this out because it’s been living in my head and it said it can pay rent

Content: Angst (some fluff sprinkled in but definitely angst (for Jinwoo and Ashborn)); Feminine Reader; Jinwoo’s POV but also second person; No one really knows Ashborn exists but some “exceptions”; Obsessed Jinwoo if you squint; Pretty sure all of them are OOC but hey that’s the best part of fanfics; If it gets confusing: yes.

Fic Length: 32k~ (semi-proofread) (LORD HELP ME IT'S A NOVELLA)

For some important context: This takes place in a world where Jinwoo uses the Cup of Reincarnation, however the new world still has hunters and gates and monarchs are still a thing. There is simply no urgency for the same war to take place so quickly like in the original timeline, Ashborn is a sort of spirit that stays with the Black Heart inside Jinwoo (like a remnant of his consciousness). Jinwoo and Hae-in are still friends here. Jinwoo knows Hae-in’s feelings already. 

You may begin. 

There’s someone staring at him. 

He would have quietly sent out his shadows after them, but he could tell they didn’t have any malicious intent. However, it did feel very intense. And… familiar? As if he could tell that it was someone he knew. Something inside Jinwoo’s chest felt warm, the black heart he carried around with him seemed to beat faster. Now that was rather concerning. Ashborn only seemed to wake up when he was in a gate or he could detect a monarch (rarely although it did happen, he would sometimes strike up a conversation). Jinwoo looks around in alarm.

When Jinwoo finally finds your glimmering eyes staring at him, he watches as they switch from curiosity to familiarity. You grin at him, bright and ever so blinding. Jinwoo feels Ashborn’s heart thump so hard in his chest that he grabs at the front of his shirt in a failed effort to calm it. He blinks and his vision blurs. He suddenly sees something else. He’s suddenly somewhere else. The place is familiar (that word seems to come so naturally right now). Jinwoo knows it’s memories that don’t belong to him. 

He is on a small hill surrounded by a sea of flowers. He leans on a large tree that shields him from the sun overhead; it’s so peaceful that the owner of the eyes Jinwoo is watching from aren’t concerned in the slightest. Jinwoo wanted to be on high alert, but the viewer felt differently, almost right at home.  

Ashborn’s memories.  

He hears rustling and a soft giggle and when Jinwoo – Ashborn? – looks to his side, he breathes out a sigh of disbelief. Jinwoo has seen a lot of things inside and outside gates, and yet- 

Lovely.

Your clothes are of royalty, detailed and even decorated with gems (were those magic crystals?) and what seemed to be high-quality fabric. Jinwoo suddenly felt that the title “monarch” fit you better than him or even Ashborn. But the accessories you wore paled in comparison to your own natural features.

From the way the air tousled at your hair and the way your skin soaked in the sun from the soft rays that slipped past the foliage, the both of them thought you were lovely in all accounts. You join Jinwoo beneath the tree and lean against it. You grin – something familiar, and yet not at all – and he looks to your lips as you grin. “Did I make you wait long? To be quite honest, I did not think you’d actually come to visit me again. But I am very happy you’re here!”

He wants to say that he doesn’t know you (that he missed the sight of you), and that he shouldn’t be here (that there was no other place he would have rather been). But no words leave him. 

The grin slowly leaves your lips and you tilt your head in confusion at the lack of a reply. Jinwoo watches as your lips move to say Ashborn?, but instead, he hears his name instead.  

He blinks and suddenly he finds himself staring at Cha Hae-in’s grey eyes, watching him curiously, the loving undertone beneath them isn’t lost on him.

Love…ly?

Jinwoo smiles softly at Hae-in. Right, right. He was supposed to hang out with Hae-in today. As friends, anyway. Although he can’t quite match her feelings for him yet, he respected her all the same. 

Feelings… He remembers a beautiful smile and a hill of flowers.

He forces himself not to, but eventually, Ashborn – of course it was Ashborn, who else? – makes him give in and looks back at you. His heart thumps – it’s Ashborn’s, how many times does he have to tell him that? – pathetically in his chest. 

Your eyes are on him still and Jinwoo knows you never looked away, not when he saw the memory, not when Hae-in came up beside him. Your eyes are on him and a part of him-

ASHBORN. A part of Ashborn-

-hurts. It hurts. Jinwoo sees a flash of hurt in yours too. Deep rooted. A betrayal, one he prays he will never know. He doesn’t have to think too much into whatever your relationship with Ashborn is just by the way his chest continues to get impossibly tighter and by the way your eyes stay solely on him across the busy street. 

Jinwoo knows what it probably looks like to you. He hears his name again and feels a tug on his sleeve. Hae-in, remaining ever so blissfully unaware of what was going on in Jinwoo’s head, smiles again when their eyes meet. She knows that sometimes he just gets like that – a little lost in his thoughts, thinking deep (listening, really) – and it helps to bring him back to reality with a small reminder. 

Like right now. She tugs again.

Right, Jinwoo breathes in and out to focus. He forces the voice in his head to be quiet (it tells him to at least come closer, to make sure that you have been well all this time) and he ignores the way his heart thumps pathetically in his chest (Jinwoo reminds it that he owns the body and a small voice in the back of his mind replies: Not completely.)

Something about your presence unnerved him. Like your very existence didn’t bode well for him. The black heart in his chest constricts painfully the more he thought about it.

His mother is awake, his sister is happy, his father is home, and he has friends like Hae-in. Jinwoo is content (he will not know the betrayal he saw in your eyes. Maybe before Ashborn, but not anymore.) He will protect what he has. 

Jinwoo is happy in the present. And he will be as well, in the future, with his family that he has reclaimed. 

But he watches the hurt in your glimmering eyes (is he imagining that? They really seem to glitter) for a beat longer and Ashborn’s heart gives one more painful beat – did Jinwoo imagine that it was louder? – and something changes. Your eyebrows raise and you watch Jinwoo curiously before you let out a small smile that makes your eyes crinkle at the sides. Something has changed. It’s small, but Jinwoo knows that look.

Hope. He’s stayed long enough.

Hae-in is surprised when Jinwoo suddenly turns and pulls her along towards the building. Jinwoo doesn’t need to know anything about you – that stolen memory was more than enough. You aren’t his concern any longer. The other heart in his chest may say otherwise but he doesn’t care. 

Sung Jinwoo is happy where he is. He has no need for you and the danger he feels with your very existence to be in his life. 

Ashborn disagrees.

=O=O=O= 

Jinwoo should have known his peace wouldn’t last long. That eventually knowing you existed would lead to one challenge to another. 

Such as now.

Chairman Go introduces you with a kind smile, but it does nothing to calm the chill that goes up and down Jinwoo’s spine. He can’t bring himself to look at you, but his efforts may as well be in vain with how your eyes kept going back to him. Jinwoo was by no means vain, but he could understand that most people could feel the mana that escaped him as effortlessly as he could fight, and that surge of energy coming from him had people turning their heads to look. But he and his hearts knew that wasn’t the case in this instance. 

It was the eyes he saw in Ashborn’s memories. He didn’t want to put a name to it, as it felt like crossing a line he wouldn’t be able to come back from. But it was undeniable: it was the same look Hae-in gave him. And it was all wrong. He didn’t know who you were, and yet you looked at him like he could give you the whole world.

It shouldn’t be that way. He wasn’t who you thought he was. He didn’t know who you were. 

You say your name with a polite bow and greet the room of other S-Rank hunters. Jinwoo is stiff as a board, looking past you in a daze, but Ashborn’s heart may as well sing at the very sound of your voice. 

It could be a different person, you know, Jinwoo reasons. He prays, really. This was a mistake. And if it wasn’t, it would lead to more mistakes. You could have simply looked similar, a version of a person or being Ashborn had known in his original time. 

When Ashborn laughs, it’s more scathing than anything he could have said. Jinwoo felt pissed and embarrassed and defeated all at the same time.

Had you known them as I have, a different name or another body would not matter. Your soul would not have to look for them: it would find itself back home without fail. 

Jinwoo hated that answer. It was bad. This felt worse than whatever dungeon he was thrown in or walked into (even the Double Dungeon). It was going to be very, very bad for him and the future he was trying to protect. 

And he knew it the very moment he tried to teleport out of that room. Before his body could even leave, your hand encloses around the wrist of his suit, and that was enough to keep him in place. 

The other hunters around are surprised – you had moved quickly and silently, almost reminiscent of Hunter Sung’s speed (maybe even faster if you were able to catch up to him) – but because of your actions, Jinwoo has his guard up almost instantly. Not only because of the danger you brought into his life, but just for a split second, he saw it: the hand holding on to him had glowed and that light alone was strong enough to stop him.

To an extent, you were stronger than him. And he knew it was because of the heart running a mile a minute inside his chest. Ashborn was letting you have strength over him and Jinwoo was unnerved that it could overpower even him. 

You tug at his wrist, eyes on him again. He doesn’t want to look. He prays to a higher being, hell, he was desperate enough to pray to Ashborn – but right now Ashborn was the most untrustworthy higher being to pray to when it’s concerning you.

“Can we talk?” 

Your voice is soft, vulnerable. Very much unlike the confident voice he heard from earlier introducing themselves to the room of powerful beings. Jinwoo raises his head and looks around the room and the other hunters seemingly scatter almost immediately. However, Hae-in stays. 

“Jinwoo?”

He’s at a loss for what to say. He could say you were an acquaintance, but the lie felt so foreign on his lips that he can’t make it out. Before he can think of a possible answer, you let go of him and turn to Hae-in with a small smile and greet her with a bow. There’s a shift in your eyes, like a sort of clarity that overcomes you.

“Hello. I am… an old friend of Jinwoo’s. Would it be alright if I talk to him? It won’t take long, I swear it. I would just like to… catch up.”

An old friend. It was no lie, but definitely not the truth. Jinwoo could feel his chest constrict once more. It was hurting Ashborn that you had to make up such a lie.

Jinwoo hated this.

To his surprise (and horror), Hae-in gives him one final look before smiling at you and bowing. She tells him she’ll wait for him in the lobby for their sparring session. She leaves without another words and Jinwoo turns back to you. He makes the mistake of looking at your face.

Lovely. 

It’s that word again. The one that Ashborn’s heart whispers, and the one Jinwoo thinks as he sees your eyes, glimmer to them back in full force. In your eyes he sees the same amount of devotion he saw in Ashborn’s memories, but now there was a sense of longing. And it hurts. He could tell Ashborn was in pain, and the more Jinwoo looked at you, the more he felt it, too. He wanted to look away. 

This was a mistake. 

“How have you been?” Your voice is soft and sweet and feels so… familiar. (But Jinwoo does not know you.)

This was one giant mistake. He tells himself over and over. He does not know you. You are a stranger who believes you love him. 

He looks down to the ground, but even that is a temporary solution. He feels something warm against his cheek. Your fingertips barely graze at them and he looks up at you again only to feel his heart dropping (was that his? Or Ashborn’s? He couldn’t tell.) 

Warm tears carefully fall down your cheeks as you stare at him. Your fingers remain ghosting at his cheek. 

“I’m sorry for hurting you,” you manage a strangled laugh and Jinwoo can only clench his fists to keep Ashborn from trying to go to you. An arm’s distance – that was more than enough for the two of you. “I’m sorry for making you wait.” 

You smile a little more and your eyes crinkle at the sides like last time, and finally Jinwoo realizes what he sees in your expression this whole time. 

It was the look of someone who finally found home. 

He feels the heat in his cheeks grow as you move to cup them completely.

This was all wrong.

In the last second, he grabs at your wrist – a little too forcefully (if he was to be honest as well), and Ashborn’s heart is lit aflame with anger in his chest, but he doesn’t care. 

“I don’t know you, so please stop.” He tightens his grip a little more to make sure you’re listening. 

The smile on your face drops, and he knows that the tears that fall from your face are no longer ones of joy. He can’t breathe right, and he knows that the way his chest tightens is no longer Ashborn’s fondness for your presence but anger aimed at him.

“But you do, right?” You cling to the hand holding your wrist, eyes desperate, and Jinwoo hated it – hated how it made him guilty and how Ashborn’s anger kept rising to greater heights. He could feel his shadows scattering underneath him, claiming the room in darkness. But you don’t show a shred of fear, eyes solely on him. Begging. Glittering. “I know you.” 

Had you known them as I have, a different name or another body would not matter. Your soul would not have to look for them: it would find itself back home without fail.

“I would know you more than any-“

“STOP.” He roughly lets go of your wrist and takes a step back. He’s more than an arm’s distance away from you. “I don’t know you. And you don’t know me. So please stop.”

The tears continue to fall as you stare at him – your eyes are dull and Jinwoo chalks it up to the dim room covered with his shadows (it had to be because of his shadows. Nothing more). He turns and leaves without another word. You don’t try to follow him. 

He hears Ashborn tell him that had he known Jinwoo would treat you as such, he would have thought twice about picking him as a successor. 

Jinwoo agrees, he really should have picked better if this is what it takes to be one.

=O=O=O=O=

You’re across the street again, the next time you see him. It already had him on edge, knowing the ensuing problem, but what made things worse is that he was with his family and Hae-in at the moment – the latter joining them after his mother and father insisted that she come along. He was ready to teleport everyone to a different location and tell them he felt mana in the air that signaled a gate was about to open and he didn’t want them there in case of danger (if he was honest, your very presence sometimes made him feel like he was about to face an S Rank gate). 

But you don’t come closer. You just watch him, and for once, Jinwoo doesn’t feel the need to hide you. No, if anything, he felt like he needed to hide them – his family – from you. But not out of shame. No, that won’t be the right word. The betrayal he saw the first time would be close. 

What must they look like to you right now? What must he look like? 

His father and mother walk ahead of the group, holding hands and chatting amongst themselves. Jinah makes a joke that makes Hae-in laugh softly, their shoulders brushing for a moment as they walk. For once, your eyes aren’t solely on him. You meet his eyes, but they also soak in the scene around him and you take a step back. 

You’re hurt, that much he can tell. You bite your bottom lip and try to make yourself look away, but you can’t seem to. You gape at the scene as they enter the park and finally with one last glance at you, Jinwoo can tell what’s on your face. 

Envy. But not the kind that he thinks is greedy or dirty. 

Just a yearning. Knowing it’s something you don’t have, hoping that you can have it. 

But right now it’s his. The very thought makes him happy and proud, but the sight of your shattered face makes him want to hide them away, and tell you that you don’t have to be jealous. That you-

No. Jinwoo turns away, going back to the happy bubble of his family. Ashborn may have given him the power, but he isn’t there to meddle with his past life, especially not with someone so closely ingrained like you. Not with the things you were expecting.

You are a part of this world, so he will protect you, but that’s as far as it goes. Ashborn disagrees. 

=O=O=O=O=

He finds Hae-in talking next to you on a park bench. 

Jinwoo’s family called the picnic quits after the sun started to set and the wind picked up, so they started to pack their things. Jinah only noticed that Hae-in failed to come back from the restroom when everything was good. Given her status as an S Rank hunter, Jinwoo’s family figured she got held up by some fans, but Jinwoo knew better.

Ashborn knew better.

Quickly excusing himself, Jinwoo exchanges with the shadow assigned to Hae-in and in an instant, he’s standing behind a bench. 

Your backs are facing him and when the grass rustles with his footsteps, only Hae-in turns to look at him. You continue to stare at the sunset. Not knowing how your eyes looked after seeing them over and over again had him paranoid.

To his surprise and caution, Hae-in calls him over happily. He stands next to her, and looks to you, and even still, you don’t spare a glance at him. There’s a soft smile on your face, most likely the one you wore during your conversation with Hae-in, but she might not have noticed how they don’t reach your eyes. 

“I saw her sitting here alone so I thought she’d like some company.” Hae-in quietly says. Jinwoo manages a curt nod before tugging at her sleeve. He’s about to tell her it was time to go when she speaks again. “Why don’t you guys catch up? I’ll help the others pack up. Be right back!”

Before he knows it, Hae-in is gone and it’s just you two. Jinwoo’s hands are clammy with cold sweat. He spares a glance at you and your blank face looking at the horizon and with a strangling heartbeat from Ashborn, he relents. He sits down across from you.

It's silent. You don’t say anything and neither does he. But he has to. He knows that. He has to make things clear with you now or he’s bound to get into more trouble in the future. He just has to break it to you softly that he was-

“Ash-“

Jinwoo broke.

“That’s not my name.” He says it through gritted teeth, he doesn’t know if it’s the anger he suddenly feels spike up because of your insistence, or the adrenaline Ashborn just shot up through his veins. “My name is Sung Jinwoo. I am an S Rank Hunter from Korea.”

“But-“ You finally face him and try to reach out slowly, but Jinwoo moves to the very edge of the bench. The space is narrow as it is, but it felt impossibly large enough.

“I am not Ashborn.” He knows it’s true, because it is. So why does it hurt to say? Is it the way the glimmer in your eyes continues to slowly fade? “I don’t know how to prove it to you, but he’s gone.”

“But I can feel-“ He can see in your eyes that you want to move closer to him, but your fear that he’ll leave again is holding you back.

“No. You can feel his heart. He gave it to me, to be his successor. But he’s not here anymore. So I need you to stop. I am not Ashborn. I am Sung Jinwoo, so please stop acting like I’m-” 

“That, that can't be right, no-“ For once, you’re looking at everything but him, and normally he’d be glad, but it felt more like if you couldn’t see him, then what he was saying was just as intangible. 

“Please listen to me,” Jinwoo holds on to your shoulders, forcing your eyes back on him. He needed you to focus. He needed you to listen or you would never understand. “He’s not here. I am not him. Please stop trying to find him in me.”

You keep shaking your head, and in a last ditch effort, Jinwoo swallows hard. “I do not love you. I have someone I already love.”

There’s a pause, where you just look at him and he looks at you. For a split second, Jinwoo is aware of how close he is. He feels your warmth, the way your clothes rustle against his fingers, how your body breathes heavy with the gravity of your conversation. He blinks and for a second, he sees you in a hill of flowers looking happier than ever. And quietly, he hears Ashborn’s voice. 

You’re here.

He lets go of you, almost as forcefully as when he did your wrist the first time you met, and the spell is immediately broken. You blink and with a pause, scoot away from him, almost crumpling into yourself as your shoulders sag. You hug yourself, suddenly cold with realization. Jinwoo knows he was too harsh, but he assures himself that he needed to be. He almost stands up to leave. 

“Do you… remember? You promised me forever when I died.” Jinwoo wanted to correct you, that you still understood and listened to nothing, but that wasn’t quite it. It felt like you weren’t talking to him, your eyes were glazed over, like you’re reliving a memory. “I held on to your promise of forever. But now I… we can’t have that. Is it wrong that I find it so unfair?” 

You raise your eyes to him and for what felt like the hundredth time, Jinwoo couldn’t look at you. He didn’t want to put a name to the expression on your face. “I truly believed I would never find that again if it wasn’t with him. Ashborn… Jinwoo… will I find someone I can say I love again, too? Don’t I deserve that, too?”

Jinwoo pauses. He hated giving false hope. He tells himself that it’s what you needed. He knows it’s what you deserve. Can the monarchs pray? He hears Ashborn mutter things that are holier than anything he knows.

“I’m sure you will,” Jinwoo means it, but it truly tasted like poison. He couldn’t breathe. He wonders what Ashborn prayed for. “I wish you the best.”

There’s a pause between the both of you. Jinwoo hears his name called in the distance. He slowly stands up and he watches as you carefully lean back into the park bench, your face completely void of emotion, despite the tears softly slipping from your eyes. Your voice is small when you talk again.

“Can… he hear you? Even a little bit? I know you said that he’s gone, but I know a soul can sometimes cling to a heart.”

He hated that you were right about that, but you didn’t have to know how far that truth stretched. “Sometimes… I think.”

“Can you tell him that I lo- no… Tell him thank you. He was the only one who mourned for me. I remember that. And I’ll always remember. That’s all. Stay safe, Ash- no, Hunter Sung.”

Jinwoo gapes as you brush away the remnants of your tears and suddenly stand on shaky legs, slowly walking away. You stop for a short bit and turn to the sunset. “Guess I won’t be able to watch it again this time,” you quietly whisper. And then you go on your way.

He watches quietly as you pass by his family, coming to pick him up.

His parents greet you with waves, Jinah smiles brightly and bows and Jinwoo stares as Hae-in smiles and gives you a small pat on the shoulder. You gave them each small bows, your back to him. He already misses the lovely look in your glimmering eyes, if only to spare him the sight of you like this – he can’t bear to think what you look like right now. To them you may have been fine, but he knew it would have been different to him. 

Jinwoo’s family comes closer but he couldn’t help but watch as you walked and walked until you were a small speck in the distance. 

With all the people and monsters he killed, somehow, Jinwoo has never felt more like a horrible human being.

Ashborn agrees.

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

The next time he meets you, he almost couldn’t recognize you, and he thinks maybe this is how it would have been from the very start.

He would have met you first in that meeting with Chairman Go and the other hunters, maybe see you in passing a couple of times around the city or in the Hunter’s Association building, and then finally have a chance to work with you after weeks in this sudden appearance of an S Rank gate.

You’re different now, or was this how you really were? (A voice in his head tells him that they both know that this was not how you really were). 

Your eyes have lost the glimmer he has been so accustomed to, and even still they’re duller than when you first introduced yourself to the room of hunters. You sit on a closed crate holding extra weapons for the other hunters, legs up to your chest, hugging your weapon close to you. You seemed lost in thought, or lost in a dream. The other hunters could tell you weren’t in the mood for any conversation, no one daring to come towards you and left you alone, despite casting glances your way. 

Jinwoo should know better – he burned that bridge in that park bench by the sunset, but the voice inside of him said otherwise. 

She’s not gonna want me anywhere near her, you know. 

Ashborn doesn’t answer, but Jinwoo already knows: he’s asking him to come forward for his own peace of mind. But Jinwoo doubted himself, too. It didn’t sit well with him. He may not have known you long all but for your obsession that he was Ashborn, but he was still human enough to feel guilty for making you feel so horrible. Maybe a small apology would suffice.

Jinwoo takes one step forward, but before he can walk towards you, he sees someone come towards you in the corner of his eye.

Jinwoo is speechless as he watches Hae-in hesitate for a split second, gauging your reaction to her presence – but you don’t make a move to acknowledge her; not that you were ignoring her, but more so you were so lost in your head that you didn’t realize she was right there. She takes a seat in the crate beside you and from Jinwoo’s place a bit of a ways from you, she gives a small greeting that snaps you out of your trance. You blink, and then you offer a small smile and a nod of your head. The smile is empty and his chest hurts.

He had half a mind to leave you to your conversation - Hae-in might be better with comforting you than he could. But Ashborn urges otherwise.  

I’ve already hurt her enough, haven’t I?

Then you cannot go any lower. Speak to her. Before you enter the gate. I do not doubt she has lessened in skill, but her focus at the moment - I worry for her. 

You think she’s gonna focus better if I talk to her?

Please. She is hurt, yes, and to be quite frank I doubt she wishes to see us- you, again, after what transpired if not for this gate. But I believe seeing something familiar will ground her, if only for the time being. 

Jinwoo lets out a sigh. Again, he is reminded of how hard it is to have two hearts, two souls, and two different lives living in a single body - but he forces himself to push through. He’s survived through worse, hasn’t he? This should be simple enough. 

You do not have to pretend to be me.

Right. No need to pretend. Just… well, he’ll figure it out somehow. Somehow.

He walks towards you and Hae-in and again, Hae-in catches sight of him first. She smiles softly at him and nods, but you keep your eyes on her expression until he’s close enough, and then your stare falls to the ground. The three of you wait for someone to speak first but no one ends up talking. Jinwoo stares at you, and Hae-in’s eyes go from him to you interchangeably, wondering about the sudden silence. Finally, you speak. 

“I… seem to have made a mistake,” you start, and the statement may have made Hae-in confused, but it startled Jinwoo the most. It was a mistake for him to think he had control in any conversation he had with you, and he was already losing ground so early. “I… seem to have confused you with someone else, Hunter Sung.” 

Finally, you look up at Hae-in, who was almost as confused as Jinwoo was at this point, with a small smile. “Hae-in, I’m really sorry, but can I ask for another favor? I promise this is the last time - but can I talk to Jin- Hunter Sung alone, again? I swear to explain things to you later, if you’d like?”

Hae-in pauses before shaking her head and smiling. “Don’t worry about it. I can tell this is a very personal matter between the two of you. No need for favors. Talk to you later.”

She leaves quietly with a bow to the both of you. Finally, it’s just you and Jinwoo again, your eyes falling back to the ground as you dug your foot into the soil. Jinwoo only lets a beat pass between the both of you before he speaks before you can get a chance to. 

“Are… you okay?” it was a bit of a stupid question, if he was honest. But it was a start, wasn’t it? Surely, Ashborn would agree. Jinwoo waits for a reaction, but there’s nothing from Ashborn and it’s silent on your end. 

“Sorry. For… badgering you so much,” you say, foot digging harder. “When I saw you on that street, I thought you were the same as me.”

Jinwoo frowns. “The same?”

You sigh softly. “I died, and I was born again into this world. I didn’t remember much back then, only small things, but when I saw you, I-”

You suck in a breath, like it physically hurts you to relive your memories. “I remembered so many memories, so many moments with y- Ashborn. And when I saw your eyes and the way you looked at me like you recognized me, I thought it was- I thought you were him. I thought I found him again. I thought I could be with him again, and I just needed to help jog your memories.”

Jinwoo clenches his fist and it felt like Ashborn was doing the same to his chest.  A part of him - he prays that it’s Ashborn - wants to tell you the truth, that not all of him is him, but there is enough of your lover left. He holds himself back in time, just before Ashborn can take control of his sudden hesitation and speak for him. 

“I’m… sorry to disappoint you. Again, he gave me his heart as a successor to his powers, but that’s mostly it,” his throat is strangled, but you don’t seem to catch the difference. “As for why I seemed to know you - well, I saw a sort of memory of you two in a hill of flowers, but nothing else.”

At the mention of that, your eyes snap to him and Jinwoo is caught speechless. This is the second time you’ve been so close to him and all he can see is your eyes, shining. Now that he’s so close, he finally recognizes the ethereal look to them - it’s the same flash of divinity he saw in the eyes of Ashborn and the monarchs, and in essence, him as well. They were still as lovely as ever. They glow at him with recognition and he flinches involuntarily. 

Noticing his reaction immediately, you lean and scoot farther back on the crate, putting as much distance between the both of you. The moment your eyes left his, the shine was gone, and all that’s left is mortality - and dejection. 

“Ah. I see. I’m… happy that even in his heart, there is a memory of me that remains,” you laugh bitterly, but Jinwoo takes no offense. It was sad and heartbroken, but as Ashborn had said - it sounded like it had grounded you. 

It sounded like confirmation - like a goodbye. 

“Thank you for talking to me, Hunter Sung. I’m aware it must have been very uncomfortable for you, and yet you’re still here,” you finally get off the crate, keeping a firm distance between the two of you before bowing deeply. “I know I don’t have to worry, but I wish you and Hunter Cha all the best. Please stay safe and healthy inside and outside the gates.”

It was cruel and the misunderstanding might come to bite him in the ass later on, but he doesn’t bother correcting you. It was better not to give you any hope. 

“Stay safe as well.”

Please be safe, Beloved. 

The name caught Jinwoo off guard. Ashborn was a being that, although righteous, was still stained in blood from the battles he had been on. But his voice had been so soft and heartfelt that it was almost impossible to think he was such a creature. One that cared so much for a single being so passionately. He wonders if that was where his fondness for mortals stemmed from?

“Jinwoo?”

Jinwoo blinks at the sound of his name once more. He looks to his side and finds Hae-in looking at him curiously and he feels like he was hit by deja-vu; there’s a difference this time, however. He looks up and around him and finally finds you quite a bit off, talking to other hunters, most likely for the ensuing raid. 

Hae-in follows his gaze and lets out a small hum. “She’s really nice.”

Jinwoo gives her a sideway glance to see Hae-in looking at you with a small smile. “You guys seem to get along well.”

“Yes, I suppose so. I knew she was a good person the moment I met her.” Hae-in replies with a small laugh.

Jinwoo blinks at the answer. “How can you be so sure?”

“She smells like you, but different.” Jinwoo feels his stomach drop, but Hae-in mistakes the look on his face as bewilderment. “Wait, wait! I know that sounds weird, but let me explain. It’s subtle, but you smell pleasant. For her, strangely enough: it’s faint, but she smells nice all the time. It almost smells like-”

“Flowers?” It was just a guess, but Jinwoo already felt like he was going to throw up.

“Yes! How did you know?” Hae-in smiles at him brightly, her eyes shining. Jinwoo can’t help but think how they paled in comparison to yours and he feels impossibly twice as sick.

He tries not to think of the memory again, but Ashborn yearns for a hill surrounded by flowers. “Ah, well, I guess you can’t smell it like that, but she smells like flowers all the time because of a perfume she wears. I just guessed that’s what you can smell, too, just a bit different.”

“Oh I see! It’s really nice.”

Jinwoo nods numbly. Ashborn agrees. 

=O=O=O=O=

How did he let it get down to this? There’s so much blood. There was so much blood that he couldn’t even tell that there was a body underneath it. Was that even possible? Was there even a body to save?

“Hunter Sung, we have to find the boss or-”

“Igris!”

His trustworthy shadow leaps into action immediately, cutting down as many of the army as possible, and yet it never seems to end. But Jinwoo couldn’t care less at the moment. The body in his arms looks up at him, and he hated how dull they looked. They weren’t supposed to look like that. He has seen so many in his short time together - happiness and sadness and all rolled in one. It was all wrong. 

Iron deflects at an attack coming their way and Choi and Baek follow up with their own hits at the enemy, but Jinwoo doesn’t move. He takes out healing potion after healing potion, Beru at his side doing his best to heal the body in his arms.

The sky was all red, not helping Jinwoo’s anxiety  - it looked like the body he was holding had drenched the whole world in blood. Why did the S Rank gate have to suddenly be a red gate? He’s never even heard of that - so why did it have to happen now?

The eyes are growing duller. Lovely, lovely. They were always lovely, even when he had made them anything but happy. Even when he stole so much. They’re not supposed to be like this.

Hae-in can’t stop crying. She does her best to support Jinwoo and the body in his arms as much as possible, shifting from attacking incoming enemies with so much ferocity to looking back at the duo behind her in insurmountable worry.

How can she stop crying when the body took the hit for her? She swings again. Jinwoo gives you another bottle of healing potion. He hates that it looks like your blood. 

Ashborn hasn’t said a single thing. 

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

Jinwoo all but speeds down the hospital corridors. He’s spent almost every waking minute of the past two weeks either trying to get a hold of your condition or wasting himself away in a dungeon, trying to distract himself until the next time he hears from you. 

Beru had successfully stabilized your condition until the gate was closed. He left you in Hae-in’s arms and hunted down the boss so quickly it terrified all the other hunters, but he was too desperate. If he had been just a little late, if he had just been a second off, well…

Since the incident, Ashborn had gone completely quiet. He failed to share any of his thoughts or feelings, and the beat of his heart was synchronized with Jinwoo’s - but Jinwoo could understand the latter as his own was beating with anxiety for every waking minute. 

But eventually, as he left another dungeon he pulverized, his phone rang. 

“She’s awake.”

He would have shadow exchanged to her room right then and there if the hospital wasn’t surrounded by a barrier to keep out mana from leaking in respect to those stuck in eternal slumber. Jinwoo rushes to your room and spots a couple of gossiping nurses on the way. He didn’t quite mean to listen to their conversation, but without Ashborn to fill the silence, it had made itself in quite easily.

“Yeah, it was really odd. Or maybe it’s a common thing with hunters?”

“Not that I’ve heard of? Or maybe they get hit there a lot, since it takes up a lot of space and it’s a blind spot?”

Jinwoo passes by them and catches on to their conversation and he feels his hearts drop.

“You think? The scar was pretty huge, even bigger than the one we had to treat. What are the chances you get hit in the same spot again? It’s a miracle she survived.” 

Jinwoo’s walking slows and slows until he goes into a full stop. The nurses leave and he’s alone in the corridor. A wound to the back that was almost impossible to live from.

Surely… not…?

“The same… spot…” 

That can’t be right. No. Please, no.

Jinwoo’s chest felt like it was on fire. He clutches it again, trying to calm a panicked heart and an angered one. His breathing grows ragged and he chokes out a sob. His sight blackens and suddenly he sees another red sky. 

The sky is lit aglow with flames and a red sun setting. Dragons and shadow soldiers fight as far as the eye can see. And yet, for all the carnage Jinwoo could see, he couldn’t hear any of the battle cries. 

 Ashborn?

Jinwoo looks down and his heart jumps to his throat almost immediately. There’s so much blood again, even with his hands enclosed in dark armor they were sticky with golden blood. In his arms rest you, in all your royal glory. He holds you closer to him, body leaning on him, and even with the armor he can feel how the flesh of your back gives way. Your eyes are dull.

 He hates it so. 

Are you… still there?

Before Ashborn could respond, Jinwoo’s vision clears and he’s back in the hospital corridor. He finds himself kneeling at the ground. His senses have mostly cleared, but something is ever so slightly wrong. He steadies himself on the wall and pushes himself up. And when he meets his eyes on the window glass, they glow a terrifying purple. He hears Ashborn’s voice, as thunderous as when he commands his army.

Again. I almost lost her again.

Jinwoo all but sprints to reach your bedroom. Choi and Baek are outside your room, conversing among themselves. Even in a hospital that blocked out mana, they stop short when they feel Jinwoo’s presence as he draws closer. They’re more than aware that he had been waiting for you to awaken, but something didn’t sit right with them seeing the Hunter look so angry.

“Hunter Sung, what are you-”

“Move.”

The guild masters feel a chill go down their spine, almost reminiscent of their time in the Jeju Island raid, even if they knew that Jinwoo had no reason to hurt them. They look at each other, having a silent agreement that surely Jinwoo - the man who had done everything he could to ensure your survival - would not do anything to harm you. They stand aside, and with a clear path to your room, he enters.

Jinwoo- Ashborn- The two powerful beings tied to your existence immediately breathe out a sigh of relief at the very sight of you, most of their anger dissipating but not completely. You’re sitting up, not leaning on the head board, looking out the window. Jinwoo is about to call out your name when he notices the loose way you wear your hospital gown. Peeking out from your thin clothing are bandages lightly soaked in pink.

The same spot.

Ashborn’s anger returns, more controlled but nonetheless fearsome. Jinwoo calls out to you. 

At the sound of his voice, you immediately turn to him and offer a small smile. For once, Jinwoo is not uncomfortable at the glimmer of your eyes. But then he remembers a body bathed in red and he takes in Ashborn’s anger for his own. Your smile drops when he fails to respond and  Jinwoo remains passive. The silence seems to eat at you.

“Is Hae-in alri-”

“What were you thinking?” Jinwoo’s voice is eerily calm, but it’s only because his own voice has already failed him. Ashborn had taken control the moment Jinwoo hesitated.

“What are you-” you flinch at the tone of voice, but despite how their hearts are strangled by guilt, Jinwoo and Ashborn push through. However, your eyebrows suddenly raise and your eyes seem to glimmer ever so softly. “Wait. Why do you sound like-”

“Stop.” Jinwoo cursed. He needed to take control before you realized Ashborn was there with him. “Don’t change the subject.”

You flinch again and tug at your blankets. You try to move away from him, but your wounds seem to act up. Jinwoo stops himself from coming to aid you - he just needed to get this out his chest and then he’ll help. A voice inside him warns him: Not too much.

“Didn’t you think of the consequences of what you did? What could have happened?”

Jinwoo watches as you carefully tug at the sheets, head lowered. “…Hae-in is a lovely person to me. Everyone, actually. She has people who love her a lot, too, but-”

Tell him I say thank you.

When you finally raise your eyes to meet his’, Jinwoo couldn’t breathe, strangled by your stare alone. A small frozen smile and the dullest eyes Jinwoo had ever seen on you, even more than when you were covered in so much red. “-I don’t want you to lose someone like that.”

Jinwoo doesn’t say anything, but it wouldn’t have mattered. You looked like you were seeing something beyond him. Your smile drops and you lower yourself back into the bed, turning your back to him.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make y- anyone worry. But… if it’s okay with you, can you tell him I’m sorry, too? Thank you. I’d… like to get some rest.”

He was the only one who mourned for me.

Jinwoo turns around, his head so loud it was painful. It had been a while since he had voices in his head that were solely his. He didn’t know what to think - which to focus on, which to start and end and which to push away.

He is beyond grateful that Hae-in is alive, but the rest of him is being rotten by guilt. He couldn’t even find an outlet through anger because Ashborn had gone quiet. Jinwoo calls out to him, if only to hear a different voice in his head. When he finally speaks, his voice is soft, almost mortal. Not the same softness as when he called you his lover, almost the opposite of it.

Those eyes. I only saw them the last I held her. They are the same, and yet – why do they not feel the same? I cannot explain why, but I do not like seeing them on her almost more than the ones I have seen before.

Jinwoo couldn’t tell him the answer, but he would hear his thoughts regardless. 

Of course Ashborn had not seen that look on you. It was the look of someone who had nothing left to lose, of someone ready to die. Did you have that look as you took the hit for Hae-in? Did you see the enemy coming for her and didn’t think twice?

That look. That was his fault. 

The door softly clicked behind him. The other guild masters stood a ways off from the room, watching him curiously and cautiously just in case he was still on edge. He says nothing, only bowing his head to them and walking away. 

He quietly asks for Ashborn’s help. Of wanting to make amends. You deserve that and much more. 

Of course, Jinwoo starts. I can’t exactly pull off what you and her are expecting, okay? Let’s get that out of the way. I… I’m not ready… I can’t love her the way you do. I don’t even know her at all. 

A friend, then. Ashborn replies softly. May you be a friend?

Jinwoo pauses, and Ashborn takes his silence as a sign to keep going. I am aware that you do not hold the same feelings for her as I do, as you do not know her and your own heart is in turmoil if it belongs to that other woman. It was wrong of me to push my emotions on to you, and I’m sure the same is true for her. I assure you that we both regret it so. It seems that in death, we have found ourselves stuck in time and have yet to accept that the world has moved on without us. With that being said- 

Jinwoo braces himself for what Ashborn was about to say. It felt like whatever he was going to ask of him, the weight of it could crush him. I would like to ask you to be a friend to her, at the very least. I can see that this world has not treated her as kindly as I would have liked or as she deserves. So if it’s the slightest bit acceptable to you, I would urge you to be kinder. However if this goes against your wishes once more, then I will not push the matter. You have already done what you could do to save her life, and I am endlessly grateful. This is simply one more selfish request. 

A friend, huh? It sounded like something small and easy, but as he thought, the responsibility it posed would be rather big. Ashborn admitted himself that you and the heart inside him weren’t simple things to underestimate, but he thinks of dull eyes that have lost all shine and his own heart is set in stone.

And if she says no?

Then it is no, Ashborn replies quickly, and then his voice goes softer. You had told me what those eyes meant. I simply do not want her to lose all hope in a universe that gave her a second chance at a new beginning. I do not want her to carry on living thinking life is so empty. 

Ashborn waits with something akin to bated breath and almost sighs in relief when Jinwoo agrees.

=O=O=O=O=

“I want to start over,” Jinwoo bites at the inside of his cheek and rubs the back of his neck. 

You stare at the edge of your bed, but you were clearly listening to him, as you fiddled again with the sheets of your bed. “What?”

Jinwoo braces himself and breathes in to steady himself. “I want to start over… if that’s okay with you.” 

There’s a pause between the two of you before you manage a strangled laugh. “What do you mean by start… over? Surely you don’t mean like-”

“Oh, uh, not like… that.” He heard how your voice picked up and immediately he coughed. Jinwoo sees you breathe out - and he’s unsure whether out of dejection or to steady yourself as well (he hopes it’s the latter so as not to make things too awkward after what he’s about to do). He can’t see your eyes quite yet - you were making sure not to look at him. He finally grumbles out a sigh “Wait, let me start from the beginning.”

“I’m sorry for what I said before, from that time you still thought I was Ashborn to me getting angry at you for putting your life on the line. I could have said things better, but I let my anger get the best of me both times. So, I’m sorry.” Jinwoo bows his head low and he sees you move on the bed to try and get him to stand up straight, however the wound on your back kicks in. 

He straightens up and tries to help you, but you flinch and hold up a hand to stop him from coming any closer - and Jinwoo is unsure if you wanted to be strong and handle it yourself or you didn’t want him anywhere closer to you. You’re both at a stand still, and finally Jinwoo moves away. He breathes out a sigh before trying to push through once more - he made Ashborn a promise, but above all else he really wanted to want this to happen.

“A-anyway, going back to what I was saying. I never got the chance to know you as, you know, you. And I suppose you never got to know me, either. So I thought, I would like to start over. I want to get to know you, too.”

There’s another pause as Jinwoo waits for your reply. You seem to be lost in thought as you catered to your wound. Eventually, you speak softly. “Why?”

“What?” You weren’t even that close yet and Jinwoo already knew he was gonna have to work harder to keep up with you and the way you took hold of a conversation so easily. 

“We both know I haven’t been the best person to you - the first time we talked to each other I cried in front of you because I thought you were my lover reincarnated.” You laugh bitterly again, maybe at the memory or maybe because of the idea of Ashborn. “I’m not sure about this… I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you again….”

Jinwoo doesn’t say anything and waits, but Ashborn stays quiet. He supposes his second heart was keeping true to his word - he was leaving this conversation up to him and you. But Jinwoo already knew what he was getting himself into when he entered your room. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but he wasn’t going to be a push over either. 

“Why don’t we give it a try, then? You said that you see me differently whenever you look at me, right? Because you remember Ashborn rather than seeing me.”

“Yes…?”

“Try focusing then. You already know I’m not him.” Jinwoo’s voice is soft, almost like he was trying to make sure the rest of the world doesn’t hear. And that’s what he wanted right now. His shadows overtake the whole room until it’s just you two. He tests the waters by sitting at the foot of your bed and you flinch. “Focus. Breathe. The way he moves, the way he speaks. It’s not me. His voice, the way he looks. It is not mine.”

Sung Jinwoo wasn’t one to give up easily. Ashborn had given him his heart, it was his job to see things through. And if it didn’t work out - then he can say he did his best to the very end. 

He holds out his hand and you stare at it hard. Your eyes are a whirlpool, shifting with a sort of shine and turmoil - Jinwoo was watching the two sides of you fight to take control in real time. He wonders if that’s how he looks whenever Ashborn takes control from other people’s perspective. He waits for a second more before he breaks the silence. 

“It’s nice to meet you. My name is Sung Jinwoo.” 

At the sound of his voice, your eyes snap up to him and he falters. It’s a whirlpool of glitter that is all encompassing. It’s lovely, yes, but it’s almost swallowing the darkness that surrounds you both. He should leave, this didn’t bode well for him, this was a mistake, he-

But he wanted to believe in you. You were a good person. You wouldn’t let this take over you, right?

He steadies himself and holds out his hand to you again. “You must not have heard me. My name is Sung Jinwoo. I am an S Rank Hunter from South Korea and the Guild Master of the Ahjin Guild. I heard that the Hunter’s Association had recruited an S Rank healer. That must be you, correct? May I have your name?” 

You blink at his words, something overcoming in your head and Jinwoo watches as the realization hits you. Ashborn had said that the two of you had simply had a hard time understanding that you were no longer living in your past, so shouldn’t Jinwoo remind you of the present?

Jinwoo watches as you squeeze your eyes shut, and when that isn’t enough you press the heels of your palms to your closed eyes and crumple into yourself. His hand falls. 

Did I fail? He hears nothing.

His shadows return underneath him and he stands up to leave, but before he can completely go, he hears you mutter something softly. 

“Come again?”

When you raise your head, they continue to glimmer and Jinwoo has half a mind to leave you right then and there, but he realizes that they only shine with small tears as you smile. Your eyes shine with mortality. 

You say your name louder as you clumsily hold out your hand to him. He laughs, shaking his head and takes your hand in his and gives it a firm squeeze and a shake. 

Jinwoo likes the sound of your name and the way he can hear the smile in it. And although Ashborn can’t remember what it was in the past, he agrees. The present is beautiful.

=O=O=O=O=O=

Although he knew you and Hae-in were close, he had underestimated how close you two had gotten in such a short amount of time.

“Hae-in? What… are you doing here?” Jinwoo blinks. Hae-in blushes in response, as shy as she always was, but you give off a small smile in response to both of them. She all but clings to your arm at the sudden attention on her by her new friend and the object of her affections.  

“I told Hae-in that I wanted to make amends with you, as she knew we weren’t in the best of… situations right now, despite knowing each other before,” you clear your throat, trying to come up with something believable for Hae-in. “And I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable too much during our outing, so Hae-in offered to hang out with the both of us.

Jinwoo wasn’t one to be uncomfortable, but there may be some truth to your words. He was just hoping to have a walk with you around the city (he thought about the park but maybe you weren’t ready for those kinds of memories), maybe get some food on the way, and have small talk. It was Ashborn’s ideas, of course. 

What should we even do? 

I wish to say that as a monarch, I have no concept of “friends”, but if you wish to know more about her that I have observed in our short time here in the present, then I can suggest some things.

Let’s hear it then.

Spending time with another is a given, yes?

Yeah, that’s pretty much understood, Jinwoo almost rolled his eyes, instead he settled for a groan. He should’ve known Ashborn had no idea of things like this, but he’ll bite. What else?

Sweets. I have noticed while she spent her time healing that she enjoyed those treats you call sweets. They seem to make mortals happy, and it seems to be the same for her. 

Okay, treats. That’s a good start. What else you got?

To his surprise, Ashborn hesitates. Jinwoo almost calls out to him when he suddenly speaks again.

Stories. Tell her stories.

Stories? What kind?

Yes, stories. Of how you spent your day, no matter how mundane. Of your battles with the other monarchs, if you so choose, as she will understand more than anyone.  And then Ashborn hesitates. Of your family. Of things that make you happy. 

Jinwoo nods slowly before he exhales softly. That sounds like things meant for a date than things you do with friends, though.

What is a “date”?

Okay, so maybe having Hae-in along would lessen the date aspect of this hang out, especially now that you two weren’t alone. 

He’s snapped out of his thoughts when you suddenly pull on his arm. He freezes when you intertwine his and your arm on one side and slightly relaxes when he sees you have Hae-in on the other. 

“Alright then,” you grin brightly and Jinwoo could have sworn the whole world had just lit up around him. By the look on Hae-in’s face, she was thinking the same thing. Jinwoo is reminded of a woman in royal attire in a field of flowers and he hears Ashborn laugh once before he pushes the thought away.  He is in the present. You are in the present. There was no need for that right now. However he can’t help but think - so this is what Ashborn has always seen? If it was, then it was lovely. “So, where are we headed off to?”

“Huh? Weren’t you the one who planned this trip?” Hae-in looks at you puzzled. 

“Nah,” you wave her comment off. “He just told me we should start by trying to hang out.”

Hae-in’s blush returns at full force. “Wait! So that means I shouldn’t even be here!”

“Hmm? Why not?” Now you turn to Jinwoo, puzzled as well. “I thought it would be fine with Hunter Sung since you guys are-” 

“Close, right.” Jinwoo knew what you were going to say and cut in. 

He didn’t want to lie to you like this. Gods, how was he going to explain this to Hae-in when the time came? How was he going to explain this to you when the time came? He planned on telling you later on - that he had only started considering courting her when you had arrived - but he wanted to do that when you had adjusted better to your new life, but for now he had to let you believe that they were together. It wasn’t that hard, really. Hae-in sometimes acted too comfortably around him.  

Hae-in blushes again at his words. You smile softly at her expression and then your eyes slowly gloss over. Jinwoo clears his throat. 

“Anyways, I’m the one who planned this whole excursion, so let’s get to it then.” You break out of your thoughts at his words. He nods to you, letting you know that he was right there beside you to help you, and you smile warmly at him. The very very sight of it makes him look away. 

Ashborn’s heart beats ever so slightly faster. But a small voice at the back of his head whispers to him that if it really were Ashborn, then it wouldn’t settle for beating so softly. 

“What’s on our agenda, then?” You smile and pull them forward, walking without a direction at the moment, just so you were moving. 

“I was hoping we could go to a cafe? Somewhere with good sweets.” Your head turns to him at record speed and Jinwoo was worried for a second that he’d see glittering eyes, but instead he finds normal but nonetheless lovely human eyes glimmering with childlike wonder at the prospect of treats. He huffs out a laugh, feeling heat crawl up his face. What the hell was getting to him?

“Oh! If it’s a cafe we’re looking for, I know a really good place! They sell the best cheesecakes around, I know you’ll love it. Just let me check how far away it is from here.” Hae-in untangles your arms and excitedly heads over to a street map. 

Jinwoo turns to you. “Are… you feeling alright?”

You breathe in deeply before nodding. “Yeah, yeah. I’m… I’m doing fine, I think.”

Squeezing your eyes shut, you breathe in again and straighten your posture. When you turn to him, you give him that same grin that almost forces Jinwoo to look away, and yet he can’t. He can’t seem to stop staring. Only one word comes to mind. “Thank you for looking out for me, Hunter Sung.” 

“No problem.” Jinwoo didn’t really know what possessed him to do it. Maybe it was habit from having Jinah around him all the time and it was reflex at that point, but he raises his free hand and pats your head. “And you can just call me Jinwoo.”

You stare at him for a beat and then untangle your arms before raising your hand up to his face. For just a split second, he sees the monarch version of you, smiling so lovingly at him (at Ashborn) as you cup his cheek, and then he blinks and he’s back at the meeting room in the Hunter’s Association as you cry when you meet for the first time, ready to hold his face in your hand. 

He’s about to move back and put as much distance again between the two of you, maybe even call the whole day off, but he makes the mistake(?) of glancing at Hae-in’s direction. It didn’t mean anything to him, truly, it was mostly concern that things would all go to hell right this very moment if she saw this scene. 

He thinks you saw his eyes move over to her, because in the next instance, your hand goes up to his forehead and you tap on it multiple times ever so lightly. 

“You don’t have to force yourself to be so… affectionate towards me if you don’t want to,” you smile at him warmly. 

He blinks and steps back, almost just a hair’s breadth away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You tilt your head to the side, still the same smile, but for a flash Jinwoo saw your eyes glitter. “Your hand was shaking. He used to be nervous around me because he felt like he could crush me like an ant at a touch. But I can understand why you’d be nervous with me. So don’t push yourself too hard. I already appreciate so much of what you’re doing for me. That’s more than enough.”

He waits for you to do something else, for your past self to take hold, but instead you just leave him be and join Hae-in by the map. You guys chat for a bit as she tells you about the cafe. Jinwoo breathes in, getting his thoughts in order. 

So far, for him, he thought it was mostly going nicely. Although it was still too early to say, he liked having you as a friend, your presence soothing, especially now that he could converse with you without having to fear for his future most of the time. He found you rather refreshing in a sense, like-

My light. She was my light. 

Jinwoo blinks in surprise again. It always caught him off guard whenever Ashborn spoke of you. 

The light is dangerous for the darkness, isn’t it? Jinwoo jokes to ease his nerves, huffing out a laugh.

For the darkness, yes. However, you and I do not deal in the dark, we deal with shadows - and shadows are always strengthened by the light. 

“Jinwoo.”

When he looks up, Jinwoo expects deja-vu to kick in again and find Hae-in calling for him. Instead, you stand alone by the map, motioning for him to come closer. He walks over without a moment of hesitation. 

“Where’s Hae-in?” he cringes, realizing a little too late what that might have sounded like - a man looking for their significant other - but it was too late to take back now. He hopes that it didn’t come off that way, but by the way your smile has a hard time reaching your eyes, it absolutely came off that way. 

“She saw you were thinking really deeply about something so she said she’d go ahead and make sure we had a spot for ourselves,” you cough lightly before turning to the map. “I don’t blame her for being excited to go to that cafe, though.”

Were the sweets that good? “What do you mean?”

“Oh, it’s that cafe you guys entered when I first saw you, remember? I’m surprised Hae-in picked it. It must be special for the both of you. I hope I'm not intruding on a place that means so much to you guys,” you walk away from the map with a pep in your step in the direction of the cafe. Jinwoo doesn’t know if you’re just trying to look okay or you’ve truly accepted it and Jinwoo wasn’t sure which was worse. 

One thing’s for sure though: he should pick a different cafe. 

=O=O=O=O=O=

He should’ve told you sooner. That was his mistake. He should have told you sooner. 

Chairman Go had noticed the sudden closeness of your little friend group, how you all seemed to "get along so well”; his words, definitely not Jinwoo’s. In Jinwoo’s opinion, you all just seemed to work well in the sense that each one was familiar with one another to an extent: he was already friends with Hae-in, you and Hae-in had hit it off rather quickly, and you and Jinwoo were, well, acquainted in more ways than one. Jinwoo’s surprised that most of his time outside dungeons, his guild and his family is now spent on the two of you. It was hard to catch one without at least another.

Even for other hunters who have seen you work together in the rare chances of a sudden dungeon break while you’re hanging out, they remark how precise and coordinated you seemed to be, like a well-practiced performance - Jinwoo leading the attack, Hae-in with back up and you for support and healing for the both of them. So, for Chairman Go, wasn’t it only right for him to ask the three of you to work as a strike squad in case of emergencies? You all could reach each other in record time, Jinwoo using Shadow Exchange to get to you quickly and lending Kaisel to Hae-in for travel (he tells himself that he merely prefers reaching you first since you can’t protect yourself as well as Hae-in could; Ashborn says it is to make sure another disaster does not happen).

And this is where he found all three of you now - just taking a short break before confronting the boss. You and Hae-in had thought of taking a survey around the dungeon just in case, but Jinwoo offered to use his soldiers to do it instead so you guys could wait for the mining team to finish cleaning up. He decided to take a short nap, but really he just closed his eyes and wanted to leave you both to your own devices for a while.

He should have realized it was a mistake. Your random conversations slowed to a stop and when it didn’t pick up again for a second too long, it suddenly took a more serious turn. Maybe you had been on edge to start this conversation from the beginning, because it sounded like you were careful about the words you were going to use, choosing which to say.

“Hae-in, whatever happens, please take care. And take care of Jinwoo for me, too, okay?” you take a short stuttering breath that goes unnoticed by your new friend and Jinwoo hears the smile in your voice. It’s soft but also sad and he wonders if you see a grassy hill again. “Although me and Jinwoo's relationship wasn’t… quite good, I still wish you and him all the best.”

“I don't know what’s going on, but of course. Please take care as well. I will forever be thankful for what you did for me, but please - no more of what happened. And of course I'll take care of Jinwoo, too. I take care of my friends.”

Jinwoo inhales sharply. Fu-

Your voice lowers to a whisper. “Friends…?”

“Is there something wrong?” 

“You’re… not dating yet?” Jinwoo hears it. There's an unmistakable flash of hope in your voice - he doesn’t have to see to know that a familiar glimmer in your eyes comes back at full force and it sends his hearts thumping. He opens his eyes ever so slightly, peeking over his bangs to see you and watches as you squeeze your eyes shut and softly shake your head from side to side. When you open them again, the glimmer is mostly gone, and all that's left is a sad sort of acceptance and resignation that grips at his chest. “He's an idiot for not asking you out, then. He’s wasting time.”

“Huh? What do you mean by wasting time?” Hae-in blinks at you, but there's a soft blush on her face, Jinwoo is unsure if it’s because she found a kindred spirit in you or it’s the direction your conversation had gone.

“Oh, I just think that the longer someone hesitates, you could have spent all that time together…” there’s a far-away look in your eyes. Lost in a lonely dream. You smile sadly, picking up pebbles and rocks absentmindedly. Jinwoo wonders if you’re tugging at flowers in your imagination.

“Woah, I thought you said you’ve never been in a relationship before,” Hae-in laughs, leaning into you and you bump shoulders. “But you sound so mature about these things!”

“Ah, did I say that? Well, I was sort of in one a long time ago,” you answer softly. “If I could have talked to myself before, I would have said - take care of what you have right now.”

But you did, Ashborn whispers. You cared for it so much it clung to you and I in death. You have done more than care for it-

“-Your love is so strong it seeps into other people.” Jinwoo freezes, suddenly realizing that he had said his thoughts out loud.

Even though he had only mumbled it, the sudden silence is more than enough to let him know that both of you heard. The silence is deafening as he looks up to see you and Hae-in staring at him. While Hae-in gapes at him, your face remains passive, reading him.

“H-how much did you hear…?” Hae-in tentatively asks.

Jinwoo tries to hide the embarrassment and panic he was feeling behind a tired exterior, pretending he had been unceremoniously woken up from his nap because of your conversation. “Just the last part, I guess?”

Hae-in is frozen stiff anyway, a smile stuck on her face. She suddenly gets up. “I- I think I’ll go take a look around the area after all, haha, right, yes, be right back everyone!”

Before you or Jinwoo could say anything, she walked away as quickly as possible. You don’t make a move to stop her or say anything to reassure her, eyes remaining solely on Jinwoo. He squirms under your gaze and when he goes to meet them, they glitter ever so slightly.

But you and Jinwoo have passed the point where he felt like running away. This conversation was a long time coming, and it was his fault for not initiating it in the first place.

“I was planning on telling you, I swear it,” he starts softly. He straightens his posture and meets you head on. “I wanted you to just-“

“I’m not mad.” Jinwoo blinks, and you give him a closed eye smile. When you open them again, the glitter is all gone. You huff out a laugh when you see his expression. “I don’t blame you for having to act like that, considering how I badgered you the first time we met. It must have been really confusing and annoying.”

Jinwoo was about to sigh in relief but then you softly frown. “I don’t agree with the way you’ve been treating Hae-in, however. I hope you’re not leading her on.”

He didn’t know what to say to that. “I’m… I’m still thinking.”

You raise an eyebrow and tilt your head to the side. “About?”

“If I should court her.” He breathes out deeply.

It was true that he was thinking about it. Hae-in was beautiful and strong willed, but also shy and kind hearted to whoever was around her, both acquaintances and strangers, as you have said in the hospital. She was a wonderful friend and someone you could trust to have your back in a dungeon. Truly, she was an ideal partner to have.

And yet… and yet… something kept holding him back. And to his discomfort and confusion, it wasn’t Ashborn’s will.

“I haven’t sorted out my feelings for her yet. I don’t want to break her heart if I can’t meet her feelings halfway. She doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment,” Jinwoo says instead.

He waits for you to hound him for an acceptable answer, but instead you just nod your head slowly. “Okay, then.”

Jinwoo nods. One responsibility after another. What he said wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the full truth either. He didn’t like lying to you like this, not after you just forgave him for lying that he and Hae-in were a couple, but this was a harder one to explain.

He didn’t want to admit it, but a voice deep inside him knew. How can he explain that things had changed and was taking a nosedive really quickly?

“By the way,” Jinwoo turns to you and his eyebrows raise to find you bashful. There’s no glitter in your eyes, which only makes him feel warmer at the thought, but he tries to brush the thought away. “About what you said earlier…What did you mean by “Your love is so strong it seeps into other people”?”

The color almost drains from Jinwoo’s face completely – he hoped you had already forgotten about that. He wants to say those were Ashborn’s thoughts, but he couldn’t lie to himself either when it came to this.

There was nothing wrong with what he said, there was nothing for him to take back. After all, your love truly did come out of you in waves. It was in the way you tried to care for people as much as you could, even when sometimes you hesitated from anxiety. It was in the way you laughed and joked with others to ease the tension even if sometimes it made you feel awkward to be the center of attention. It was in the way you tried to remind others that life was enjoyable with a little kindness along the way.

I do not want her to carry on living thinking life is so empty, that’s what Ashborn said, and Jinwoo understood why. Someone who wanted others to see the world in such a beautiful way shouldn’t have to think of it so lonely.

“Because,” Jinwoo starts. He watches the soft look on your face and all he can think about is it’s only you and him. There is no you from the past and no Ashborn. Just him and you.

He hears footsteps coming and the spell is broken. He swallows as Hae-in comes into view from the corner of his eye. Jinwoo doesn’t look away. “It’s the way you heal people. I simply mean that I can tell you love others by the way you heal people.”

Your eyebrows raise, waiting for him to crack a smile and tell you it was just a joke. But when he doesn’t, you smile, looking away. Your eyes don’t gloss over. They don’t shimmer with divinity. You rub the back of your neck, bashful to hear his compliment. Hae-in apparently heard his comment and excitedly agreed, clinging to you once more.

Jinwoo didn’t need a voice to tell him anything as he watched you laugh. He thinks of a woman in a hill of flowers wearing a simple dress that seems to make her even lovelier and beside her, Jinwoo sees himself. He can’t hear their conversation, and yet they smile like the world could never hurt them.

It’s a blissful feeling, is it not?

Jinwoo knew exactly why he couldn’t make a decision. Glittering eyes and a soft smile have made sure of that.

You wanted this from the very beginning, didn’t you? Jinwoo asks bitterly, but there’s no real bite to his words.

I will not say that I did not hope for it, the monarch replies. But this is a development that I find more than desirable. For me, you are seeing her the way I do, and that pleases me so.

He thinks of glittering eyes and almost lost himself in a dream of his own but then he thinks of your soft frown, and the subtle hurt behind them.

“I just hope that when you finally get your feelings in order, you haven’t made her wait too long.”

Why did this have to be so difficult? Ashborn laughs bitterly, but he agrees.

=O=O=O=O=O=

The end comes to him in the form of a message from your strike squad group chat.

“Jinwoo, can you spare some time?” Jinwoo felt a shiver go down his spine. Why did he suddenly feel so nervous over a small message from you? It felt like such a drastic change from the previous days. He found himself looking forward to you messaging him to hang out or to hire the Ahjin Guild to handle a dungeon with you.

But this felt different.  

“Where are you right now?” Jinwoo’s already trying to look through his shadows to find you. He finds one bathed in a familiar warmth and he grabs hold of it.

“Café. Hae-in is here with me.”

Within the next second, he’s beside your usual table in the café. He finds you sitting in your usual corner by the window, nursing a drink that has obviously been there for a while now. For once, Hae-in sits across from you, on Jinwoo's bench. She usually sat beside you to give Jinwoo some space and to just be close to you, but now there was no chatter shared between the two of you. Jinwoo found it unnervingly quiet. He watches your far away expression as he sits next to you and from his peripheral he sees Hae-in flinch.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” You’re knocked out of your thoughts, but you don’t answer fast enough, still in a bit of a daze. Jinwoo puts a hand over your head, trying to get your attention and finally Hae-in speaks.

“She’s leaving,” she says, a bit too bitterly for Ashborn and Jinwoo’s taste. However, when he turns to her with a frown, his anger subsides ever so slightly when he sees the unshed tears at the corner of her eyes. Ah, yes, of course she won’t be taking this lightly, but for now the most important thing is-

“Wait, what do you mean you’re leaving?” Jinwoo felt impossibly numb. He didn’t even have time to process what he was feeling and you were-?

“The Hunter’s Association of each country is holding a collaboration – a sort of exchange program for a year. Each one sends a few of their hunters to other countries to work as a representative, and our country receives reps from the neighboring countries as well. It’s to strengthen bonds in the case of another S Rank dungeon break, among other things,” your voice is monotone as you explain to Jinwoo slowly, as if you’re repeating the message verbatim, like you’ve memorized it a hundred times. “They thought I should-”

“Don’t agree, then.” Jinwoo’s voice is cold and it snaps you and Hae-in out of your separate thoughts, shaking you both to your core at his tone alone. He’d normally try to be soft with you but he keeps going, anger rising. “They can’t exactly force you to do something like that if you don’t want-“

“I’m going,” you don’t meet his eyes, you don’t want to, from what he can tell. Jinwoo was tempted to grab your face and force you to look at him. If months of progress went down the drain and he’d see those glimmering eyes the both of you had worked so hard to keep at bay, then so be it.

He couldn’t understand – what was going on? He thought everything was going well. You weren’t confusing him as Ashborn anymore. You saw him for who he was, and he saw you for who you really were. You were friends, yes, but he also wanted to-

“What the hell are you saying?” he grabs your shoulder, trying to force your eyes on him. He knew he just needed to see your eyes on him and things would fix itself. “Why would you want to go? I don’t get it, I don’t understand.”

Why…? Where did we go wrong?

Hae-in abruptly stands up and leaves, a hand over her face, but it does nothing to hide the tears falling from her face. You almost try to get up and comfort her, but you remember that Jinwoo is quite literally blocking your way as he sits next to you and he’s still trying to get you to look at him. You cast your gaze past him. Your eyes are glossing over, a hint of a glimmer. Jinwoo is scared he’s imagining that it’s there at all.

“Please, help me understand.” He successfully gets you to face him, hands carefully guiding your head towards him, but you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to block him out of your senses.

Look at me. Jinwoo doesn’t have to see to know that his eyes have taken a more purple hue. I need you to look and see that I remain here with you. I have gone nowhere since. Please.

“Jinwoo, I-“ your voice saying his name is something he would have relished in any other given circumstance, something as familiar as his abilities, as normal now as Ashborn’s presence. But at this moment it was strained, like you didn’t know him, like it was a mistake that you did. And yet he insisted so – that you had a future that you would be present in one another’s lives.

“What happened that-“

“Jinwoo, I need you to let me go.”

He quickly removes his hands from your face. Every part of him right now hurts, but if it meant that small little orders from you at this moment would have you letting go of a humongous decision, then he was willing to do it. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so rough, I-”

“That’s not what I meant,” when you open your eyes to him, he sees a whole galaxy in them. You smile sadly, and it’s then that he realizes some of that galaxy is tears pooling at your eyes. “I need you to let me go now.”

…What? The thought that comes to mind is an echo between Ashborn and Jinwoo.

You choke out a sob, a wobbly smile still on your lips, and try to push yourself away from him, shrinking further back into your little café corner. “I… to be honest, a part of me… still hopes… of… you already know. And I am tired of it. You and Hae-in have shown me nothing but kindness. So, I wish to put an end to these stubborn thoughts. Please let me go.”

No. Wait for just a moment.

You clear your throat and put on a strained grin, the one he knows you wear when you’re having a hard time keeping the past you at bay. “I’ll continue to send updates, if you and Hae-in want! The three of us can have calls, too. But…”

Tell her.

“Jinwoo, please don’t assign a shadow soldier to me.”

He still had to tell you.

“I know you’ll try assigning a shadow for me. And I appreciate it. But for my own peace of mind, please don’t.”

NOW. “I swear I won’t be impulsive as before, after all, I have all of you waiting for me, so please – rest assured I don’t need one.” You swallow hard. “I simply… wish to be the friend you deserved from the very beginning. The one that doesn’t cling to you in the hopes of reliving the past.”

He wanted to cry, he couldn’t say anything. Ashborn prays to wake up in a hill of flowers.

“Will you let me have this?” you smile, eyes crinkling at the side. Tears slowly cascade down your face and even still he thinks you’re lovely, no matter how it tears him up inside.

Jinwoo clenches his fists until his knuckles bruise white. He stays across the same bench from you, but it’s different this time. You’re the one keeping distance as you press your back to the café glass, putting as much distance between the two of you. He doesn’t make a move to come closer.

With all the mental strength he had left, he agrees.

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

Despite Hae-in taking off in the middle of your initial announcement, all three of you had decided on trying to spend your remaining time in Korea together. You try not to talk about your departure as much as possible, and Hae-in doesn’t bring up how you and Jinwoo had talked as minimally as possible the following days.

When the day came, your departure from Korea was met with heartbreak and tears all around. Tears from Hae-in as she was losing a close friend, heartbreak from mostly Jinwoo (definitely Ashborn) that he kept hidden behind a solemn expression.

You go and give Hae-in a hug as you both cry and laugh, promising to keep in touch. When you let go and notice Jinwoo staring at you, you hesitantly pull away from Hae-in.

He wonders which one you see in his eyes at this very moment – blue or purple?

The being that has loved you from the very beginning or the one that has come to? Both now losing you.

You had chosen to wear sunglasses on your departure – you tell Hae-in so it can go with your outfit and it was embarrassing for the other hunters to see your swollen eyes, but Jinwoo knows otherwise. He can’t tell who he’s looking at right now, but whoever she was, she hesitates to come closer.

You hold out your hand to shake his and Hae-in is surprised at the gesture. Jinwoo stares at it blankly. Hae-in’s sad face has suddenly turned worried as it shifts between you and Jinwoo, wondering if the bad blood has suddenly come back and was rearing its ugly head at this climactic moment.

But in the next second, Jinwoo grabs your wrist and pulls you to his chest in a hug you would have said was more crushing than Hae-in’s. He cradles the back of your head in his hand, pushing you as close to him as possible – hoping that maybe if he holds you tight enough maybe you’ll be a part of him, that you won’t be able to go. He knows how this might look like to Hae-in, but it didn’t matter. He was beginning to crack at the seams and his desperation was leaking through.

He wanted to say so many things.

Don’t go. I made a mistake. I shouldn’t have pushed you away like that.

Do you know what you’ve done to me? I thought I knew what I wanted, but now I know what was holding me back all this time.

You were right. We should have spent more time together. Can we have that now? If I beg right now, will you let me have that?

“Please come back,” he whispers instead.

-to us. Please. And when you do, may you stay forevermore.

You pull away first, and it hurts. Ashborn’s heart hurt. Jinwoo’s heart did, too. Especially when you refuse to look at him again. You clear your throat and manage a strangled laugh.

“Stay safe, guys,” you smile, but the sun hits your glasses at just the right spot and he sees eyes glittering. They seemed to glow fainter and fainter until there was nothing but dullness. Not even a mortal shine to them. “And I hope you guys stay happy.”

The soldier Jinwoo assigned to you goes back to his shadow. It cries out sadly as you board the plane.

Jinwoo walks Hae-in home. Despite her best efforts, he doesn’t crack a smile or say anything past a hum or a single word when she initiates a conversation to break the sad atmosphere of the day. He waits for her to get in safely to her apartment - not even noticing her dejected form feeling she did not have both of her friends for comfort at the same day - before he walks away.

Jinwoo finds himself in a park bench facing the setting sun. When he sits down and closes his eyes, he sees teary glittering eyes absolutely heartbroken.

“Ashborn… Jinwoo… will I find someone I can say I love again, too? Don’t I deserve that, too?”

I love you.

And they weep.

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

Something was off, that much was certain. Jinwoo couldn’t put his finger on what it was, and it was making him slowly lose his mind.

It didn’t start immediately, of course. As you promised, you kept in touch with them as much as possible. He was pretty sure that he could be living under the same roof as you at the amount of updates he and Hae-in received. To an extent, it warmed him at the thought that you had stayed true to your word of letting him know what was happening with your life and it reassured Ashborn of your safety. It did feel like you were still there with him, but he would have preferred being able to actually see you right there beside him (Touch you as well, if you’d let him, Ashborn whispers)

He and Hae-in would usually meet up at the café to give you a video call to make things more convenient by being in the same place. But by the way your eyes glossed over at times seeing them together, he knew what you were thinking. He wanted to reassure you, tell you that whatever feelings or thoughts you think he had for her aren’t there, but you weren’t here either.

And he couldn’t do that to you, not when you had asked to get some space so you could move on.

But he wanted to wait, the same way Ashborn did, the same way you did. And if you and Ashborn had found yourselves in another world, in a new time, and still clung to each other so fiercely, then surely the universe would give him a chance as well.

You were most likely just having a hard time reigning in your past self, as you had said. You needed time to adjust, and maybe some time apart would help with that.

All in due time, Igris whispers, comforting the monarchs.

Right, Jinwoo agrees, and so does Ashborn. But Ashborn should’ve known the universe was a fickle thing.

A few months in and you were having a video call with him and Hae-in again at the café. You were in a hospital bed, hit with a strange spell that was able to incapacitate an S-Rank healer such as yourself, enough to make you go down with something like a fever.

It had knocked you out for a full day, and your sudden absence concerned your friends, but they had both received messages during your treatment when they kept asking for updates that left Jinwoo with a bad taste in his mouth.

hey. i’m her friend. she’s asleep right now. should be awake by tomorrow. i’ll tell her to call when she gets up.

The odd typing was one thing, but the lack of introductions or any other info didn’t sit well with him. Hae-in was concerned as well, but chalked it up to a hunter that was with you who only used your phone for a second to answer their incessant messaging.

Jinwoo would’ve accepted that, that is if he wasn’t paying attention to most things about you. If there was anything he knew, it was that you never gave away your phone password to just anyone. It was a rather hard to remember pattern that you would swipe quickly so no one would remember, and you’d only slow down to teach it to a close friend.

But he still kept his calm. Yes, despite getting used to your arrangement here in Korea, maybe you had gotten yourself a couple of friends in China. He was happy for you, truly. You were beginning to live a little on your own.

Jinwoo kept calm, breathing deeply. You were alright. Things were going to be alright with you, and right now they were.

“Are you feeling better now?” Hae-in asks worriedly, but then she looks thoughtful, “Your friend didn’t really give us any details past that you were resting and we’d hear from you today or something.”

“…Friend?” You blink, and then you clear your throat. “Oh, yeah, my friend. Did they call you?”

Something wasn’t sitting right with Jinwoo, but he was unsure if it was dangerous for your wellbeing when you were so calm about it.

“No, they just sent a message,” Hae-in smiles softly. “Look at you! Finally making friends. Aren’t you going to introduce us?”

Jinwoo flinches. He saw something. Just there. At the corner of the screen.

Something moved.

“Introduce, yes, um,” you laugh bashfully. “Maybe next time, yeah? They’re a little… shy.”

You say that, and then it happens. For just a split second, you look to the side, right at the side where the movement came from, and then your focus is back on the screen and them. You smile softly, in complete peace. It reassures Jinwoo, but still something nags at the back of his mind.

Would you like me to go check, my king? Beru, ever so dutiful, asks. He was ready to travel through shadows or up in the air with just a word from his master. Our queen’s safety should be top priority, yes?

There’s truth in that, however, Jinwoo wasn’t used to Ashborn hesitating like this, not when it came to you. We have sworn a promise to her, have we not?

Jinwoo wanted to reason that they had promised not to put a shadow soldier on you, but not that they wouldn’t check up on you with a shadow every now and then. Or maybe Jinwoo could go and visit you himself? You’d appreciate having a friend visit, right? Especially in your current state.

But Jinwoo knew it inside – he was just making up excuses. And he knew Ashborn was right – he was breaking your trust. You were trying to be a good person moving on from the past and an even better friend, and here he was asking you for more.

You were fine.

He pretends not to see you cast another glance at your peripheral and the corners of your mouth tick up in a smile.

Thanks for the offer, Beru, he says finally. But we’re all good.

Right. They were good.

=O=O=O=O=O=

It was the little things that were slowly leading up to something that Jinwoo couldn’t ignore anymore.

Your updates lessened quite considerably, but that was understandable. A few months or so after that talk you had during your time at the hospital, things had taken an upturn for you and your career.

Your name had garnered international levels of recognition as people started hearing about an S Rank Healer from Korea aiding the best hunters of China in a nearly catastrophic raid. Again, Hae-in and Jinwoo were nearly worried to death, but at this point they were becoming slightly used to it. However, it didn’t completely stop Jinwoo from wishing you’d come home soon.

Especially when something was starting to seem… off.

He wanted to say something, even Ashborn was unnerved by this turn of events. They could sense that things had changed, they just couldn’t put their name on what it was.

Yes, your updates had been significantly cut ever since China had asked you to be more active in their Hunter’s Association guild activities, but it wasn’t just that.

Whenever you had calls at night with Jinwoo – he says he just wanted to check up on you after he got out late from a dungeon and he wasn’t able to meet up with Hae-in – they were sometimes unceremoniously cut short. Sometimes it would be a knock on your bedroom door or your phone ringing by your bedside if you were using your laptop for the call. You’d apologize profusely and with a heavy heart he’d have to let you go with an understanding smile. At first, he had thought it was just work calling you late into the night and cursed at the Hunter’s Association for working you to the bone.

And then, it was during video calls while you were having a walk outside. Hae-in had ran up to Jinwoo while he was having his daily quests for the day to show that you were on the other end. He decided right then and there that the daily quest could wait, punishment zone be damned, your appearance would come first. You were having a morning walk as well in a park near where you were staying. Jinwoo thought he was imagining it at first, but then it happens a second time. Something dark flashes into the corner of the screen for a second and then it was gone again. When he waits for it for a third time, it doesn’t come back out, and Jinwoo is left feeling like he was slowly losing his mind.

But he couldn’t keep lying to himself anymore. He loves you, but that didn’t mean he’d keep making up excuses to himself for you. Something was up.

It all comes to him not from you, but from the news. Once more, you’re under the media’s focus as they celebrate another successful raid with your help. This time, they announce your tremendous support for China’s best. Jinwoo watches with bated breath as he stares at the hunters leaving the gate, one in particular.

And then they realized what was going on.

You had been hiding something.

Not something, Ashborn whispers. Someone.

Jinwoo agrees, but the more he watches, the more he wishes for glittering eyes to look at him once more.

The best type of partner really was someone you went to dungeons with, huh? Especially when they looked at you like that.

Gold eyes almost shining as bright as yours whenever they looked at you. 

They look familiar, Ashborn says. Jinwoo agrees, unnerved. They pray they are wrong.

=O=O=O=O=O=

Far too long. It’s been far too long since you saw each other face to face. A year flew by so quickly; you weren’t around, only seeing and hearing each other through calls and getting updates through messages, and then suddenly you were meeting again in the flesh.

But it wasn’t quick enough. Not for Jinwoo. Not for Ashborn.

Jinwoo fixes his tie one more time, unsure whether to tighten it to keep his nerves steady or loosen it slightly again so he’d be able to breathe better despite already trying to suppress his hyperventilating.

“Jinwoo, are you okay?” a familiar voice asks. “You’re looking pale and you’re breaking into sweats.”

He turns around to face the blonde woman. Hae-in smiles at him serenely. She wore a modest dress for the formal event that only served to accentuate how lovely she looked.

Without thinking twice how it might appear, she reaches up and fixes his collar and tie for him. In Jinwoo’s periphery, other hunters cast glances their way.

He knows what they’re all thinking, especially with how close they were. He’s heard it more times than he can count.

“You look great together.”

Is that what you still want? Ashborn asks tentatively, voice quiet in the back of his mind. My words remain true, you know, even to this very moment. If you wish to pick a future for yourself, I will no longer hold you back. I will love her still, but you…

Jinwoo had invited Hae-in to the International Hunter’s Guild Conference After Party as his plus one. He had heard from someone that surely the Hunter’s Association representatives - that accursed event that made you think to leave in the first place - would be invited as well, so he immediately asked Chairman Go to be Korea’s rep for this conference (not mentioning he merely wanted to see you again). Maybe he knew from the very beginning, or maybe he just remembered their little strike squad, but the  chairman (bless his heart) thought it would be wise to invite Hae-in as his partner. Although a little hesitant, Jinwoo agreed just to be sure the chairman didn’t suddenly think to change his decision. Besides, Jinwoo thought, he figured you would have definitely missed her and looked for her (and if Jinwoo went alone, you might have scolded him for not bothering to bring her along if he was able to in the first place). So to be quite blunt, he had invited Hae-in to be in your good graces. 

He was starting to realize this mistake, however. Ever since you had left and he had fully accepted his feelings for you, his thoughts were more so filled with you. But now, lost in his reverie and at the idea of seeing you again, he had guiltily forgotten Hae-in’s feelings for him. They still hung out but it’s mostly when they were meeting to have a joint video call with you. He found himself not spending as much time as her outside of that. She got busy when your strike squad got put on hold so maybe she didn’t notice as well. But now, Jinwoo realizes he has to keep his word to you, he won’t lead her on - he’d let her know he wasn’t interested in her. 

And then maybe he can tell you how he truly feels now. The idea is blissful, just as Ashborn had said before. Maybe twice as much because it was him that was feeling it all now, and not only a side effect from Ashborn’s feelings. But there’s a chill that runs up his spine - what if you don’t accept his feelings?

What if there’s already some-

Wait. Jinwoo shook his head. One at a time. He had to see you first. Made sure you were alright, despite your words during your calls. He breathes in deeply, thinking of glittering eyes looking at him and a hill of flowers but beyond that, he remembers a sweet smile and beautiful laughter from someone who made him warm and at home. He had an answer to Ashborn’s question the moment he said goodbye to you at that airport, and he swore it would never change. 

We’re way past that question, aren’t we?

Ashborn laughs in agreement, but Jinwoo can still hear the relief in it.

Jinwoo raises his hand and holds onto Hae-in’s wrists before lowering them. He gives a small tilt of his head towards the crowds of party goers to let her know to look around and she realizes his intentions. Almost immediately, she removes herself from his grasp and takes a good few steps back, her whole face red. Jinwoo side glances at the people who remain watching and stares them down until they’re nervously forced to look away. He sighs in annoyance.

Where were you? We’ve all waited long enough, haven’t we?

Almost on cue, he feels it. One of his soldiers is lit with a familiar warmth and he immediately knows which one it is. After all, it had watched over you for months before you departed and you were put in separate ways, he can tell it had missed you, too, as well as all his shadows. He looks around in a rush and finally he sees a familiar head poking from the crowd.

Beru gleefully trills. Our queen is h-!

Jinwoo gapes. You make your way past the crowd and into their line of vision, but that’s not all Jinwoo notices. Even Hae-in and, from what Jinwoo could tell, other hunters have noticed as well. Or maybe they couldn’t see it, but feel it is definitely a better term.

You looked otherworldly – almost even more than your past self, if Ashborn was honest. Your very presence is all consuming and Jinwoo is reminded of the hospital room where the both of you had started anew. Except this time, he knew that no matter how dark his shadows tried to take over, you might as well overcome it and more. Your eyes don’t just glitter anymore. Your whole body was practically glowing.

My light, Ashborn had said. And although Jinwoo said he understood later on, he didn’t think he would completely see it like this.

Light. Yes, you were definitely as blinding yet comforting as light, Jinwoo thought so. Especially when you run towards him and Hae-in. You throw your arms open and rush them into a hug. If all three of you had been normal people, you might have crashed into the floor right then and there, but Jinwoo and Hae-in stand their ground, returning your hug with just as much fervor. When you've had your fill of touch, you step back to look at them fully and admire their presence.

You go to hug Hae-in again and she grins like you were never separated. Jinwoo supposes he failed to control his expression - he blames it all on Ashborn - but when Hae-in sees his face, she pulls away first. You pout, but then she turns to Jinwoo.

“Don’t act like a stranger now!” she laughs, grabbing him by the hand and pulling him closer to your little group.

He gapes at her, unsure what to do for a moment, before he turns to you. You’re staring hard at Hae-in, gaping just as much as he was moments before, most likely, before your eyes travel to his hand enclosed in Hae-in’s. In a split second, he pulls away from her and clears his throat to ease his nerves. The sound seems to knock you out of your thoughts and you finally look at him. Jinwoo can’t breathe. 

“Heya. It’s been a while,” you smile at him softly. Your voice sounds like heaven to him, now without the barrier of static that came of hearing you behind a phone. It was you. 

Your eyes do not glitter, but they shine with so much joy and your whole being glows with so much life that your time apart felt like no time away from each other at all. Like Ashborn had said - his soul had found itself home. 

It was all you, and all Jinwoo and Ashborn could feel was pure elation. 

Jinwoo gives you a lazy grin, lost in the happiness of it all. “Hey.”

There’s a pause and he sees your hesitation - you go to raise both arms for a hug but stop a quarter of the way, eyes looking at him with a flash of uncertainty, doubting yourself - before Jinwoo closes the distance. He’s waited long enough. They’ve waited long enough. 

He holds you just as tightly as he did in that airport all those months back - an arm around your waist and a hand cradling the back of your head, pulling you as close as he could. 

“Welcome back,” he whispers the words into your ear and he feels you shiver. A small laugh rings out in response, echoing beautifully in his ears at your proximity. 

Welcome home, beloved.

“...Oh, about that…”

To Jinwoo’s displeasure, you pull away first again. However, his hearts continue to beat fast and elated as you take his hand in yours (he tries not to think about how you hold Hae-in’s in the other). You grin at your friends, positively seemingly a source of light for the whole room. 

“It’s been so long. We’ve got so much catching up to do,” you laugh again, and Jinwoo felt like he died and was reborn all over again. He was clinging to every word that came out of your lips. “Before anything else, I need to tell you guys something.”

“Wait, wait! Before you say anything more, this calls for a toast.” Hae-in grins. “Let me get some drinks for us! Be right back, I’ll be super quick.”

Hae-in breaks free from your grasp and disappears into the crowd before you can tell her to stop. Only you and Jinwoo are left and you sigh in resignation with a small laugh. You catch him staring at you from the corner of your eye and give him a small smile.

Jinwoo’s hearts were pumping a mile a minute - he was scared you’d let go, and then it would feel like you weren’t here again. He knew it was a silly thought - because you were right here with him, in the present - but the fear still crept up to him. Especially with how you were suddenly acting. 

You look up to where Hae-in disappeared off to, before turning back to Jinwoo. A chill runs up his spine as your eyes meet, but this time he knows it’s not because of the overload of happiness he was feeling from reuniting with you. There was something behind your eyes as you looked at him. 

“I would’ve liked to tell you both at the same time, but I also think you deserve to know first before anyone else,” you smile, and Jinwoo wonders if he imagined he saw something bittersweet in it for a split second – your glow flickering for just a moment – before everything is seemingly back in place. You swing your hands together once. Jinwoo almost forgot you were still holding his; it felt too natural to have you so close. “Come with me for a sec?”

He smiles serenely at you and swings your hands together again. “Of course.”

Jinwoo lets you lead him to a corner of the gala hall, close to a window and far away from the crowd. He relishes the way the moonlight shines down on you, but the sudden happiness suddenly cuts short when you let go of his hand and he’s thrown back into the present. The warmth of your body is gone and he felt like the cold of the night air was seeping in even when the window was sealed close. 

Something was wrong. You felt so far away all of a sudden. 

You grin at him and something inside him – Jinwoo, Ashborn – sighs at the very sight. He's reminded of a hill of flowers, and yet why does he see a red sky?

“Jinwoo, you were right.” Your smile brightens even more, but finally Jinwoo realizes a little too late why he was so bothered. That look in your eyes. He knows it. “I have found the mortal heart that will stay with me.”

It’s the same smile you gave him when you first saw each other in that street, separated only by a crosswalk and a red light. But this time, that smile is not for him, and that red light is reminiscent of a red sky that keeps you from him. 

Please… tell me it’s a lie…

Jinwoo goes quiet. Smiles at you. Pats your head like he always does. But he doesn’t say anything.

Back then, you would have noticed so many things. His smile is fixed. Hands shaky. 

But not this time. He hopes at least that you pretend not to notice. Surely you still know him. More than anyone else, you said so yourself, right?

Surely, I am still there with you…?

“You don’t have to worry about me anymore.” Bright. Light. You shone so brightly. And yet that light was for…

It was his mistake.

He already knew you were lovely, the word or anything like it wouldn’t be enough to describe you.

So what made him think that any other heart wouldn’t have seen that as well?

The silence is deafening. He can’t hear the other hunters conversing around him or the music playing in the air. Only a ringing in his ears, not even a thought from the black heart that throbs painfully in his chest. Slowly your smile slips and confusion is in your face, but all Jinwoo can see is the way your eyes glitter. Now that he was seeing it so close, they seemed to shine a different color. 

“Jinwoo…? Are you okay?” you tilt your head in concern. “You look… pale…”

He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. What does he even say? He’s saved – or cursed – when Hae-in comes back with a tray of drinks. 

“It took me a while to find you guys. Sorry for making you wait!” Hae-in excitedly greets, handing you one of the drinks. She looks at you but all you can do is smile at her awkwardly as you look away from Jinwoo. Hae-in looks confused and turns to Jinwoo, who continues to stare, eyes dull and far away. When Jinwoo still fails to say anything more, Hae-in tries to strike up the conversation once more. “So, what were you going to s-?”

“Oh? Rìluò, did you finally find those friends of yours?”

Jinwoo felt all the blood in his body go cold, almost stopping short in their circulation. A name unfamiliar to him, but the way it’s spoken so fond, so soft, by a voice seemingly so used to harsh words comes from behind the three of you. Jinwoo prays for it to be wrong, for the person to make a mistake, but when you turn around first, he can almost hear his hearts shatter into a million pieces. He watches the smile on your face stretch and your eyes shine so bright they could look like small suns.

Golden…?

“Zhigang! Took you long enough,” you laugh heartily, but at this moment Jinwoo can’t help but think they sound screeching to his ears. 

The black haired male huffs a sigh, but there’s a smile on his lips – fond, soft, and all meant for you. Jinwoo can feel himself grinding his teeth together, trying to keep it together. “You took off so quickly it almost felt like you were trying to get away from me as fast as possible. Don’t tell me you still think I’m trying to tie you down to China?”

Jinwoo watches you playfully roll your eyes before walking closer to the male and before he or Ashborn can stop himself, they find Jinwoo’s hand enclosed around your wrist. Jinwoo blinks in surprise at his own actions, and looks around to find you and Hae-in staring at him, just as surprised. From the corner of his eye, he can see the stranger staring at him, too, golden eyes hard and face impassive, waiting for his next move. 

“Jin…woo?” your voice is soft as you blink at him and Jinwoo looks at you, expression conflicted. 

He eventually gives you a sheepish laugh, but he doesn’t let go. His hands feel clammy with cold sweat, and he’s forced to let go. He clears his throat. “Sorry about that. Just… a force of habit, or something. So, who’s your friend?”

Jinwoo didn’t mean to put so much bite into the last word, but a bit of Ashborn had slipped past him without meaning to. They don’t try to take it back, though. Especially when they watch the other male tilt his head to the side, staring at him blankly for a second before there’s a sort of mirth in his eyes, his mouth ticking up at the corners – challenging. Jinwoo could feel his shadows stirring beneath him, his anger rising.

Jinwoo hears Beru screeching. This man dares to mock his highness! My king, let me- 

Stop. It does not bode well to do anything now. She watches. Ashborn cuts in, but Jinwoo doesn’t miss how his voice sounded dull, like it was coming from far away. 

The man holds out a hand to you and Jinwoo feels something get stuck in his throat as you take it without thinking twice and stand by the man’s side, hand still enclosed in his. Jinwoo watches as you intertwine your fingers together and lean into him. 

“Jinwoo, Hae-in, this is Liu Zhigang. He’s a hunter from China who happens to be my partner,” you smile shyly as you rub the back of your neck and Jinwoo can only think how bittersweet it felt to stand here at this very moment. “Well, my partner inside and outside gates, if you get what I mean.”  

Hae-in gasps and Jinwoo can only watch. You  grin at them both, and when your eyes land on Jinwoo, he manages a stiff smile. 

"Well someone's been busy while they were abroad," Hae-in huffs out a short laugh. Jinwoo manages a single laugh to contribute to the conversation, Liu Zhigang has been watching him from his peripheral this whole time and it was getting on his nerves more than earlier. 

Something... something isn't right.

But Jinwoo can't seem to hear Ashborn clearly. His blood is rushing in his veins.

"Sorry for hiding it from you guys for so long," you smile apologetically, and yet your eyes glitter so brightly it dampens your sad expression. "It's not that I don't trust you, but Zhigang thought it would be for the best if no one knew for the moment considering his title as a National Level Hunter."

"It's very annoying, but unfortunately despite my title, it hasn't stopped my so-called "hunter followers" to not being so welcoming to a possible love life. Something about only deserving someone who could stand toe to toe with a National Level hunter, which is their way of saying no one can stand by my side," Liu scoffs, the disgust on his face clear as day. But with a small laugh from you, his face immediately morphs into something calmer and Jinwoo doesn't miss how he gives your hand a single squeeze. Jinwoo wanted to punch a wall and he vaguely feels Ashborn retreating into the recesses of his consciousness to calm down lest they do something they'll regret. "Why the hell should I listen to any of them, though? Rìluò is more than worthy than any of their sorry asses. But even though I won't hesitate to send any of them to an early grave, I would prefer not to put her in any possible danger."

He smiles pleasantly and holds out a hand to Hae-in first. "Enough of that, however. It's a pleasure to meet the infamous Cha Hae-in. My dear partner can't seem to shut up about her companions whenever she's given the opportunity to talk about them." 

You let go of him for a second to punch his shoulder before looping your arms together; Jinwoo is reminded of your first outing as new friends. Hae-in gives his hand a firm shake and returns his warm smile. "Thank you for taking care of my best friend!"

Liu nods and turns to Jinwoo. "And the infamous Sung Jinwoo. Although I have heard of your name before in the news, I have to admit I know you and Miss Cha more from Rìluò's stories and the calls you had whenever she was free. Or refused to talk to me."

"I'll always prefer to talk to them than you, though," you grin mischievously. Jinwoo felt like a statue you had brought to a conversation he wasn't welcome to. "Although you are useful sometimes. Thanks to you, I was able to attend this event and come to Korea. So I guess I have to thank you, Mr. National Level."

Jinwoo snaps into the present for a second. "What do you mean you were able to come to this event because of him? Weren't you automatically invited as a representative?"

"They changed the rules at the last minute," to Jinwoo's displeasure, it was Liu who replied for you. He fights to keep his face as impassive as ever. "The representatives are supposed to be included, but when they dropped the invitation, thankfully I could still come here with her as a plus one."

"I doubt they would have denied a National Level hunter's request though," Hae-in jokes. Jinwoo truly felt like he should have walked out of this conversation a long time ago, however your light was too addicting, even to this very moment.

"True. But still!" you laugh merrily, and Jinwoo was doing his best to pretend that Liu wasn't there watching his reactions. "Now we can go on a double date later!"

Jinwoo's unable to hide the way he flinches, but no one notices him still. Hell, you still thought they were an item. Thankfully, Liu had turned from him at the right time to give you a smile. From the corner of his eye, Jinwoo sees Hae-in blush in response, but she's at a loss for words and she's unable to properly deny your proposal. 

"That's-! I, um, we're not really-" Hae-in slowly loses her voice as her face goes completely red. Jinwoo could only feel his head throb. 

"Maybe... next time. I'm not feeling too good for tonight," he finally says. It was no lie. He felt faint. All the negative emotions rushing through him in a rush were taking its toll, and elevated by the other heart struggling to survive in him at this very moment, he was feeling the breakdown of a lifetime. 

You look at him with concern. "Are you alright? I can heal you if you want-"

"That's alright," Jinwoo does his best to give you a reassuring happy smile. He can't lose his composure completely in front of you. He won't. He refuses. Even though the familiar warmth of your healing was so tempting. If he feels it, he might just spill everything he was feeling right then and there. "Thanks for the offer, though. I appreciate it."

"Maybe it's best to sleep it off," Liu cuts in, and again Jinwoo feels his blood thumping in his ears. He meets golden eyes straight on, but this feels to be a mistake, because something in the back of his head throbs worse. He thought it was because of his hearts breaking in record time, but something was trying to push through. 

Something is... very wrong. I feel like... I've met this man before. 

Jinwoo swallows hard, trying to put Ashborn's voice on the back burner for just a few seconds. "Yeah, maybe."

"In that case, we should head home, Jinwoo," Hae-in says and she steps closer to try and help him somehow. Jinwoo groans - this wasn't doing well for your idea of him and Hae-in. But his head kept on hurting impossibly worse, it was almost a struggle to stand. 

"Get some rest, Jinwoo." You pull away from Liu to give him a hug. He returns it readily, but he doesn't hold you like before, he settles for wrapping an arm around your waist. Your scent was comforting, and yet... something kept bugging him. You pull away far too soon and give him a warm smile. "Don't worry! Zhigang was able to ask the Chinese Hunter's Association to let us stay here in Korea for a little longer."

""Let you"?" Jinwoo squinted at you. Maybe if he let himself faint now, he'd wake up and this would be all a dream. "I thought you were coming back home?"

"Ah. About that..." you and Liu share a look and Jinwoo already knows he'll hate the next few words. "I'm... thinking of moving to China. D-don't worry, though! I'm still thinking about it. I just thought it would be nice to be close to Zhigang." 

You say don’t worry, but the last time you said that, you left them for China and came back with a boyfriend. Jinwoo couldn’t even summon the energy to be surprised at the moment. He knows it’ll sink in later on, but he just felt numb and in pain at the same time. 

I… am forgetting something, Ashborn sounded so far away. Something very important.

“I’d say I’m surprised, but after you just introduced us to your boyfriend, I can’t say anything would be more surprising.” Hae-in sighs and you manage another sheepish grin. Something catches Liu’s eye and he turns to something in the crowd of hunters before turning back to your group.

“Rìluò, I’m sorry to ask this, but can you come with me? I want to introduce you to some of my associates for a second.” Liu nods to his men who stand several feet away from your group and they immediately head to the direction of where he was looking just moments before. 

You glance at Hae-in and Jinwoo for a second before throwing your arms around them again. When you pull away, you grin at them before turning to Liu. “That’s fine with me. Jinwoo needs to rest up anyway.”

No, Jinwoo wanted to say. I don’t need rest. But his head was pounding. Where the hell did this migraine come from? 

“Let’s go then.” Liu holds out his arm to you and you grasp it. You throw your friends one more wave before Liu leads you back to the party. 

Jinwoo watches you walk away through half lidded eyes. They were slowly closing, but then they opened in alarm. He watches as you reach to your back – to your scar – and rub it. His face morphs to concern and almost automatically he takes steps closer towards you. He needed to make sure you were okay, but then he stopped. 

Without missing a beat, Liu untangles his arm from your hold to rub your back in soothing circles. Jinwoo sees it: his hand glows gold. 

And then his vision fades to black. 

Again he sees a hill of flowers. But he also sees the red sky. The hill is sprayed with golden blood. Ashborn… Jinwoo holds you in his arms once more, and he feels like crying. But as he raises his head, the dragons and his soldiers are not there. 

A monarch stands before him and you, laughing maniacally.

After he had dealt the deathly blow to your back, his hands now dripped with golden blood.

The same gold as his eyes.

Jinwoo’s eyes fade back to the gala, eyes momentarily blinded by the lights of the event hall. His stare is focused once more into you and Liu, conversing animatedly with hunters and officials Jinwoo couldn’t care to know about.

It’s him. Ashborn’s voice echoes in his head. That man is him. 

The migraine that had taken hold of Jinwoo earlier was now completely gone and was replaced with a primal anger that had him gritting his teeth until his mouth hurt, but he could care less. 

And now he holds her like he did not take her away.

Jinwoo takes a step forward, his shadows ready at a moment’s notice. Screw a National Level hunter, he’d go down if he had to. What’s important is that you weren’t anywhere near h-

He hears laughter, and he watches as you grin. You’re glowing again, and the shadows underneath Jinwoo seem to steady themselves. Even the anger he felt earlier dissipates ever so slightly. He tries to take one more step, but he falters. He can see the glitter in your eyes, aimed at Liu. The hunter returns your grin as you shared another joke between you both, and Jinwoo felt like the world was swallowing him whole.

You were happy.

“Jinwoo?” Hae-in appears beside him, holding on to his arm. He felt a little unsteady on his feet and it must have been obvious to her, “You alright?” All he could manage was a small nod as he continued to stare at you.

Hae-in follows his gaze and after a small pause, she speaks. “Oh. I think I figured it out.” 

Jinwoo swallows thickly. There’s that feeling of deja-vu again. A conversation that did not bode well for him. “What is it?” he finally answers.

“Something was bugging me when she first arrived. I couldn’t smell her scent. But that’s not quite right. It’s not that I can’t smell her. It’s that she smells different.” 

“Like what?”

“Like him. He smells like a hunter, but I can actually tolerate it. Somehow, her smell compliments his. How can I put it? It’s sort of like when people layer their perfumes - it’s like their scents go well together. They smell different separately, but together they smell completely new.”

There’s a beat where Jinwoo prays that she stays quiet for the rest of the evening, but he should have known better. He should have known that whatever higher beings are there looking over him have hated him from the very beginning. 

Hae-in smiles, “They look great together.”

Jinwoo and Ashborn could only stare, silently grinding their teeth. Not only did they disagree, but they hated that whole sentence altogether. 

They had to hate it. For what it meant for you otherwise. And what it meant for the future you could have had together.

 =O=O=O=O=O=

He takes Hae-in home shortly after. The ride back was silent. Hae-in figured he felt more off than he wanted to show, so she let him be.  

Jinwoo feels funny. He asks Ashborn for his thoughts. Maybe how to feel better. 

It’s quiet. Jinwoo feels like he has a single heart in his chest. It had never been this silent. 

But he knows Ashborn is still there because it hurts. His chest hurts so much. Too full. His chest feels too full. He hasn’t felt pain this bad since he was still a player. 

“Thank you for taking me home,” Hae-in smiles brightly at him as they stand outside her door. Brightly. There’s that word again. Her eyes are grey, but Jinwoo blinks and sees divine eyes full of devotion for him, sees dull mortal eyes in a hospital, and then he sees eyes so happy in Hae-in’s and he feels like he’s going to throw up. 

Jinwoo nods numbly. Hae-in, concerned that he was sweating so much, tries to reach out to him but he reassures her that he's fine (it's fine, it's fine, it’s fine). And Jinwoo heads home alone, his mind a mess.

Jinwoo immediately beelines for the bathroom, stumbling in and locking the door. 

He looks at himself in the mirror.

His eyes are the ones you had when you were in the hospital.

“Ash… born?”

There’s a beat before he hears Ashborn.

I always wondered… I had easily thought it was simply something only felt by mortal beings.

Why had you asked them for the cup of reincarnation?

Just once more. That’s what you said.

Just once more.

And then it's silent again. And Jinwoo hates it. 

He closes his eyes, pressing the heels of his hands to his eyes, hoping he can erase the image of you and Liu and also erase the look in his eyes. 

Instead, he’s back at that hill where he first saw you. You’re no longer there. The flowers continue to bloom. But you are not there. The sun remains overhead, the tree shielding him. But you are not there. It’s so empty and his chest feels ready to burst.

He opens his mouth, ready to call for Igris and Beru, anyone to help him or bring him to a hospital. 

But instead he hears Ashborn’s voice, calling your name – your real name (it’s the same name, you are the same one, you always have been) – on that lone hill.

Jinwoo hears himself whisper your name to the bathroom walls.

But you're not there. He looks at the mirror and the only eyes that stare back at him is his.

The world has never felt this cruel.

 =O=O=O=O=O=

Jinwoo didn’t really know what he was expecting, but this was definitely not it. This was definitely not the way things were supposed to go, and in all honesty he wants to blame you, just without the anger or hatred attached to the word. Just that everything was falling apart around him and he couldn’t do anything but watch it happen and try not to break from all that was transpiring in these last few days. 

In record time, he had found himself back with you, but you seem to have grown farther away from him, impossibly more so than when you were miles away from him. He thought it couldn't get worse.

But of course, he was wrong again. 

Liu Zhigang sat in front of Jinwoo, quietly drinking tea, and the shadow monarch heir was doing everything he could to keep Ashborn from calling out one of the soldiers to attack him. If he was going to be honest, trying to suppress Ashborn was helping distract Jinwoo from wanting to do the same. Golden eyes watched him carefully as Liu took another sip, almost as if he knew what was going on in Jinwoo's head.

Hae-in sits beside Jinwoo, waiting for the two men to start the conversation, but they continue to stare at each other silently. Feeling the tension rise between them, Hae-in finally clears her throat to catch both of their attentions, but they don't seem to hear her. She clears her throat once more, louder, a frown on her face now, and finally Jinwoo looks away and Liu closes his eyes, seemingly enjoying his drink all this time. 

"Well, thank you for inviting us over, Hunter Liu," Hae-in smiles warmly. Jinwoo continues to look around everywhere in the cafe except for the golden eyed man. He breathes in deeply, feeling his shadows stir underneath him. 

Ashborn, calm down. Jinwoo internally sighs. The black heart in his chest beats erratically.

Knowing who this man is makes it hard to. How can you tell me that knowing what I know?

"Of course, but I don't think those words are quite right," Liu smiles lazily, setting his cup down. He leans back into his seat and gives the cafe a once over. "I’m honored to be welcomed into someplace special to Rìluò and her friends." 

Jinwoo felt more bitter than ever. Welcomed, right. Sure. If you asked Jinwoo, it felt more like he was desecrating the holy ground shared by your group. It didn’t help that Hae-in had insisted on him sitting on your spot by the window. 

Liu Zhigang had secretly contacted Jinwoo and Hae-in, saying it was something important that concerned you, but under no circumstance were they to inform you what the meeting was about. Jinwoo hated the thought of going anywhere with Liu Zhigang without you around - truthfully, he was worried that he might lose control of his body to Ashborn and his soldiers. Normally he wouldn't mind letting lose- especially if it was for you - but he wouldn't know how to justify the murder of a National Level hunter. And above all else, you would never forgive him once you'd find out. But Jinwoo was more than worried. What if you were sick? What if there was a problem you couldn't solve even with one of the strongest hunters in the world that stands beside you? He was still one of your closest friends. So with a bitter heart (and an enraged one) he agreed to meet up with Liu and Hae-in in the cafe you always went to. 

"I'm really sorry for cutting to the chase, but about what you said over the phone," Hae-in immediately jumps into the topic at hand and Jinwoo thanks her in his head for initiating the conversation. He could feel the venomous words in his mouth, trying to slip past and bite at Liu. "Is everything alright with our friend? She's not hurt or anything is she?"

Hae-in says the last part in a rush and Jinwoo can almost feel his blood stop circulating at her words. Thankfully - but annoyingly - Liu shakes his head with a small laugh. Jinwoo knew he was simply amused at the idea, but it still felt so mocking. 

"No, of course not. I’m sorry if I worried you, I didn't mean to. Had anything happened to Rìluò, you would be the first for me to contact, just like before. She actually ordered me to inform you of anything that happens to her if she's unable to give you any updates, so I assure you it's nothing serious," he laughs once more, before his face takes on a slightly more serious look. He runs a hand through his hair before he turns back to the duo. “I… wanted to ask how to make her happy.”

Jinwoo almost feels the world stop. Ashborn’s silence could even be deafening. There’s a pause before the same thought runs through them.

Why… would your murderer want you to be happy?

Jinwoo watches the look on Liu’s face closely, looking for something amiss – hoping for one, if he was a little more honest – but there’s only a small smile as he stares out the window, he looks lost in thought. But the more Jinwoo looks, he sees a familiar glimmer in golden eyes and he forces himself to look away. 

He was serious, but that just made Jinwoo and Ashborn more confused and angry. Was he leading you on? Planning on making you happy before he killed you once more? Did he think that since Ashborn was no more in flesh, he had the perfect opportunity to hurt you once more? But that just made things more confusing – Ashborn was essentially gone, so there was no need to kill you, right?

Or was this monarch simply so bloodthirsty that it did not matter as long as you bled once more? Jinwoo was spiraling and yet he couldn’t stop it, not with Ashborn’s anger backing up how he was feeling.

“Happy?” Jinwoo’s voice is harsh, and he knows that being so openly antagonizing would have made you hate him. And yet… and yet… he couldn’t seem to help all the bubbling emotions he was feeling. “Are you telling us that she’s not happy with you in the first place?”

Liu turns to Jinwoo, the smile on his face not faltering even for a second. If anything, it seemed to grow ever so slightly, and it was pushing Jinwoo to the very edge. 

Hae-in turns to him in a panic, glancing at Liu – very much remembering that he was still a National Level hunter – and speaks hurriedly. “Jinwoo, I’m sure that’s not what Hunter Liu is asking from us.”

Jinwoo and Liu continue to stare each other down, each one refusing to back down. “... Is that so…?”

After what feels like forever, Liu leans back into his seat, throwing an arm over the back of the seat. He smiles pleasantly and Jinwoo’s tempted to jump over the table. “I apologize if I failed to explain better. My Rìluò is happy, of course. I make sure that everything she wishes for is granted and more, however…”

Something flashes over his face for a second, something Hae-in missed, and something Jinwoo couldn’t pinpoint correctly. Almost like… anger? Liu was looking out the window again, something unseen. “As of late, I feel as if she… hasn’t been in the best of moods. And I don’t want that. Not for her. Never for her.”

“As such, under the guise that I wanted her to spend more time here in Korea, I came up with the idea to meet both of you,” he turns to them, golden eyes determined. And again, Jinwoo and Ashborn are unsure if it bodes well truly, and yet it riles them up all the same. “Who better to ask for help than her closest companions?”

Hae-in smiles, reassured, but she throws a nervous look at Jinwoo for a split second – the male completely quiet the whole time. “I see! It’s great that you care so much for her. We’d love t-”

“I’ll think about it.” Jinwoo cuts in. Hae-in turns to him, eyes wide at his answer. 

“Jin…woo?” Hae-in stutters out. 

The table is silent. Liu doesn’t say anything for a second, until finally, the smile on his face completely drops and his expression is cold. “Now why would that be? I’m sure my request is reasonable?”

Jinwoo shrugs, and he doesn’t have to look at a mirror to know his eyes blaze with purple. “Just a little confused why someone who claims to love my friend even needs tips to make her happy. She’s someone who finds joy in the smallest of things. So I wonder why-”

“Stop.” Liu’s voice leaves no room for question. There’s a pause, before he manages out a single laugh, but there’s no real humor in it. It sounded empty. “I have no idea why you’re so hostile towards me, Hunter Sung. But I will respect your wishes.”

Liu stands up and Hae-in nervously turns to Jinwoo and Liu, unsure what to say to solve the issue. Jinwoo was staring hard at the table.

Before Liu leaves completely, however, he stops right beside where Jinwoo sat. The lazy smile on his face is back. “Had you not been her friend, things would not have ended this easily, Hunter Sung.”

Hae-in felt like she held her breath until Liu was out the door completely before turning to Jinwoo in a rush. “What was that all about?”

Jinwoo could feel his hands shaking as he held them underneath the table, he knew his knuckles were bruised white as he held them in fists. If he squeezed them any stronger he might actually break a finger or two, and yet it wouldn’t be able to dampen his thoughts.

“I don’t like him. Simple as that,” he replies. He slowly releases his hands, trying to calm their shaking.

Hae-in stares at him incredulously before frowning. “Jinwoo. That’s not the truth and you know it. Tell me. Why are you so angry at Hunter Liu?”

Jinwoo doesn’t answer. How was he going to say it to her anyway? How does he tell her that he knew her first as the reincarnated lover of a monarch that lives inside him? That despite pushing her away at first, he had fallen for her? And now that she had moved on, he couldn’t seem to be the one to let go? How does he-

“Is it her?”

Jinwoo blinks. Did… he hear her right? He slowly turns to Hae-in. Her face is blank as she watches him carefully. 

“...What?” It was a dumb response, but it was all Jinwoo could manage at the moment. 

“I’m… I wish you wouldn’t treat me like a fool,” she says quietly, her head lowered with a sad smile. 

“No, of course not, I just…” Jinwoo swallows thickly. He supposed this was it. “I’m sorry. I… wasn’t quite sure how to tell you.”

“It’s… okay,” she says, but Jinwoo doesn’t miss the way her eyes water as she looks away with a laugh. “I would be lying if I said I didn’t know. When you look at her… when you touch her… it always feels more like a friend. I suppose I just hoped that maybe… I could have been mistaken.”

Jinwoo breathes in deeply. He already screwed up enough times. He needed to do this properly. “Forgive me, Hae-in. I… couldn’t return your feelings.”

Hae-in smiles sadly, her face crumpling. For a second, she refuses to cry, but eventually she turns around. Jinwoo looks away, if only to give her grace. After a few minutes, she turns back around. Her eyes are slightly swollen, but she clears her throat and pushes on. 

“Don’t worry. I won’t lie that it hurts… but you don’t owe me that,” she smiles bravely with a nod. 

Jinwoo manages a small smile. At this moment, it was all he could offer her. “Thank you.”

Hae-in looks away, nodding slowly, but when she turns back to him, her eyes are determined. “If… it’s not too awkward for you, can we still be friends?”

Jinwoo manages a laugh. “Of course.” He holds out a hand. “Friends.”

Hae-in smiles and laughs, holding on to his hand and shaking it once. “Friends.”

But Hae-in’s expression turns grave. “What… do you plan to do now? With Hunter Liu…”

“I… don’t know.” Jinwoo admits.

“I can’t bring myself to hate her or anything, despite our… current circumstances. So I promise I will say this as her friend,” Hae-in purses her lips. “She’s really happy… you know?”

Jinwoo pauses. When he closes his eyes, he sees a hill of flowers.

They agree. 

=O=O=O=O=O=

Jinwoo walks a ways behind your group – with you and Liu in the front and Hae-in in the middle. Jinwoo had a feeling she purposefully put herself there to make sure he didn’t try to do anything. 

Which was a funny thought for Jinwoo. For all the hatred and anger coursing through his body – both his and Ashborn’s – he wasn’t stupid enough to pull off anything right in front of you. 

But the moment your line of vision wasn’t on him and the other hunter – well, it was up for debate whether he would act on anything and the chances of not were fairly low and getting lower the longer he watched the both of you laugh and tease one another. 

Because of this, he was both thankful and annoyed that you were here together.

Just say the word, My King, Beru starts, voice just as venomous as he and Ashborn felt. Jinwoo wonders if it’s because his shadows reflected emotions or Beru really did just enjoy your company from what he sees with your time with Jinwoo and now felt robbed by it. Sometimes they really did feel like his children. He smiles at the idea of how his companions treasured you so, before he hears his dutiful shadow continue. I’ll rip his head off by his hair. 

Jinwoo is unable to keep himself from snorting at the thought, but when the group turns around at the sound, he expertly covers it with a coughing fit. Although not all are convinced.

“Jinwoo? Are you doing alright? Are you still feeling sick?” In record time, you leave Liu’s side (and to Jinwoo’s great satisfaction, he sees the other male’s eye twitch ever so slightly) to come closer to him. You enter healer and friend mode as your hand goes to his forehead, trying to feel for the familiar warmth of a fever. Jinwoo relishes the feel of your skin on his. Even when the last time they touched you was just the gala a week or so ago, it felt so long ago. Your touch was welcomed and it would be no exaggeration to say it was something they’d craved. He's tempted to lean into your touch.

But when you don’t sense any difference to his normal body temperature, you pull your hand back, and Jinwoo is left with the passing cold breeze that brushes through him and into his very soul. The lack of your presence is all the more apparent. “Maybe we shouldn’t have gone out today. Are you sure you’re not sick? A hunter’s quick healing  should have kicked in by now.”

You look at him, trying to read his face, and all Jinwoo could focus on was the worry on your face, the light in your eyes. He had seen that same look before, the first time he had met the first you in that hill of flowers. You had looked at him with concern when you called out for Ashborn and he failed to respond. He had walked away back then.

Oh, how time flew. He wished he could go back, to start again. The Cup of Reincarnation felt like a wasted opportunity now. Why did he have to meet you now after using it? This felt like a hell of his own making. Is this what he got for trying to get rid of the monarchs? He met and loved the reincarnated lover of the monarch he housed, only to lose her to the reincarnated monarch of the one who killed her.

It felt like one big comedy skit for everyone to laugh at while he’s left the butt of the joke.

“A cold, is it?” The deep voice is grating to Jinwoo’s ears, but he pretends not to notice it. You turn your head slightly to the side, listening, but your eyes remain with Jinwoo. He hoped they’d stay on him longer, if only for this moment. “That’s not quite what I heard. It was an interesting sound…”

The spell is broken and finally you look away from him, severing your short connection, Jinwoo swallows hard. He was feeling worse by the second. He looked away or else he was going to openly glare at Liu even when he knew you would catch him doing it. 

Control yourself.

Jinwoo breathes deeply. You’re one to talk. Don’t think I forgot you’re more blood thirsty than me.

“Eh? What do you mean by that?” You naively tilt your head, confused at Liu’s words, while the male stares at Jinwoo seemingly serenely. Jinwoo glares at empty air, all the while Hae-in’s eyes shift worriedly around everyone.

“Hmm. Don’t worry about it, Rìluò, maybe I heard wrong,” Jinwoo can almost see the smirk in his voice and the mirth in his glowing eyes. “But I do agree that Hunter Sung seems like he isn’t doing too well. I wonder why? Maybe you should head home early. There will be other chances to meet up.”

“Thanks for your concern,” Jinwoo looks up, managing a smile through gritted teeth as he fights being more sarcastic by the minute. “But I’m not missing out on any time I could have spent with my friend when she just got back from abroad.”

You turn to Jinwoo, touched by his declaration, and Jinwoo would be lying if he said he didn’t feel warm and proud that he made you happy. But Liu just had to cut into the moment with a hum. “If you say so. Just let us know if you change your mind.”

Jinwoo frowns, lips pulled tight. “… Right. Thanks.”

“You guys are… acting pretty odd…” you frown at them, eyes shifting from him and Liu suspiciously. Jinwoo breathes in deeply before he meets your eyes, trying his best to give you a smile that could convey everything he was feeling; you always knew how he did before, he hoped it didn’t stop now. You turn to look at Liu, who raises his eyebrows at you almost innocently with a lazy smile, but no one misses the softness of his gaze whenever it was aimed at you. “Are you guys-?”

“OKAY!” Hae-in claps her hands together, unable to take the tension. You jump at the sound, turning to her with complete surprise. Hae-in blushes at the sudden attention, but she successfully cuts through the tension from earlier. “Let’s start and go over our plans for today.”

She looks around the group, trying to hype everyone up. Jinwoo manages a small smile, but they don’t quite reach his eyes before they go back to you, and Hae-in doesn’t have to guess why. Liu’s eyes betray nothing as they watch Jinwoo closely, before he feels Hae-in’s stare on him and he gives her a small nod. You – bless your soul – smile brightly at her in support, seemingly oblivious to your other guests. Hae-in could tell from the strained way you were trying to ignore them that you were struggling just as much if not more than her. 

“What’s on the agenda?” you grin in excitement. Hae-in mirrors your expression – if only to forget about the two men as well – before it falters for a second.

“Oh, uh, well…” Hae-in looks to Jinwoo for help, rather unsure as well where they were heading off first. After all, he knew you best, right? He’s taken back to your first outing. Back then, he wanted nothing more than to guide you into forgetting who you thought he was. Now…

This could be a chance. Ashborn’s voice suddenly rings in his ears, urgent and desperate as he felt.

For what…?

Ashborn sounded so mortal, and that was what scared Jinwoo the most. 

To make things right. If anything, a final attempt to. 

“We can look for a cafe to stay at again,” Jinwoo tries to smile brighter, eyes burning slightly purple. Jinwoo almost missed it, but for a split second, he saw your eyes flash with a glimmer as you stared at him. It only fueled him to continue. “Let’s not go to our usual spot. Maybe something new? Hunter Liu can pick one out. Hae-in can tell him which cafes have good desserts. Of course, Hunter Liu knows her favorite desserts, right? After all, he knows her best.”

Hae-in sucks in a breath, closing her eyes for a second like everything she was hearing was physically painful. But before the others could notice her reaction, she turns to Liu with a small – albeit wobbly – smile. “There’s a small map over there that details the best food and cafe stalls surrounding the park. Would you like to check it out?”

Liu gives Jinwoo one last once over before he gives you a small smile and nods to Hae-in. They move forward, expecting everyone to head over to the same direction.

“Wait,” Jinwoo grabs your wrist and almost immediately, his head and hearts are filled with warmth as they come into contact with you. He clears his throat and forces himself to focus. “Can we chat for a bit?”

You gape at him and for a second he’s dejected when you turn to where Liu and Hae-in slowly head off to, getting farther and farther away. But then you look back at him and he sees the familiar swirl of divinity in them. You blink, and they settle amongst the regular color of your mortal eyes. You give him a small smile before nodding. 

He gently leads you to the closest open area he could find on a park map. However, when the both of you arrive, his hearts drop. The last time he was here, he had teleported to get there, so there was no time to figure out the route. But now he felt himself getting sick at the memory. And with a side glance from you, it was clear you were thinking of the same thing.

You’re back at the park bench. Hell.

“Well, this is certainly… a place. I promise I didn’t mean to bring you here.” Jinwoo laughs and almost immediately, you share it with him. Your voice sounds like a choir to him, not a note of it out of place for his ears. It felt just right, perfect even, as everything when it came to you. He sighs out one more laugh before he raises his head and meets your eyes. You’re glowing again. “How have you been?”

“You pulled me aside to ask me that?” You laugh and all Jinwoo could think was how this is how things should have been from the very beginning. “I should be the one asking you that since you’ve been feeling off since we last met at the gala. I was really worried, you know! And you even started coughing earlier. Make sure to tell me if you feel off, okay? I’ll give you a discount when I heal you.”

“Ah, well, don’t worry about it,” he grins again. He felt like he was his old self again – young and an optimism that never seemed to go away. A voice at the back of his head was telling him that this wasn’t right, but just as Ashborn said, it felt so natural, so lovely, that he found himself lost in the ecstasy of it. “I… just realized we haven’t had a proper conversation ever since you got back and I thought we could have one right now, if it’s cool with you.”

You clap your hands together in apology and bow deeply. “I’m really, really sorry, Jinwoo! I didn’t mean to make you guys feel like I ghosted you. I promise we’ll hang out more in the following days! I’ve just been busy showing Zhigang around and introducing him to some acquaintances, so…”

Maybe the look on his face was too telling, but your voice carries on and drifts away, smile fading to something softer. You don’t continue what you were about to say and let the silence wash over the both of you. You look around and Jinwoo takes a moment to admire your features. The setting sun illuminates you, giving you an otherworldly glow. It was close to the divine glow that sometimes overtakes you, but this feels warmer. More welcome. For what feels like the first time, you are not the one from the past world, but just yourself. And it made Jinwoo’s face and chest feel so, so warm. Your eyes are aglow with the setting sun. 

The hill of flowers has never looked so beautiful.

“We missed you.”

The words that he thought were just at the tip of his tongue come out softly. He flinches, not meaning to blurt out how he was really feeling. Hell, what did he do?

“I mean,” he lets out a sheepish laugh, trying to cover his horror. “Me and Hae-in. We really missed you, you know?”

You blink before letting out a small grin. “Yeah, yeah…I missed you guys a lot, too. So much…”

A silence passes over the both of you once more. He looks around and his eyes land on the park bench beside you both and he feels a shiver run down his spine. It was probably wrong that he brought you here, seeing that bench felt like a harbinger. 

Finally he clears his throat. “Hey, so, about what I needed to tell you… Something really important.”

He knows he’s not imagining it when he sees it again – there’s a soft glimmer in your eyes, but you squeeze your eyes shut and look away. Almost on instinct. He pauses. Why was he hesitating now?

He wanted to tell you – that man was the one who killed you in a past life. 

I have no idea how he found you, beloved, but don’t be fooled by him. Do not trust him. He does not have your best intentions at heart. He will hurt you once more. As a monarch that craves chaos, he will certainly do it aga-

You purse your lips before taking a deep breath. “Jinwoo… I think I already know.”

“What do you mean by… you already know?” Was he that horrible at keeping secrets?

You let out a sad – bittersweet – laugh that it almost felt scathing. But not for him. “I told you before, right? You may not be him, but I would still know you, even a little bit. I come back and you and Hae-in still aren’t… and I noticed how she’s been acting recently. And there’s the way you and Zhigang talk… Can you tell me if I’m imagining it? Do you…?”

Oh. Oh gods. That was one of the things he didn’t want you to figure out, but somehow it was the most obvious one? He felt like he was sinking into the ground and he really did hope the earth would swallow him whole. He should have known that if it was obvious to Hae-in then it wouldn’t be too far off for you. Hell, now what?

Jinwoo can feel Ashborn squeeze his heart. He already knows what the other wants to say, but he breathes deep and holds him down. 

Well, if he was honest… Didn’t he want the same thing? They were two different beings, but sometimes they shared similarities in thoughts and ideas. His voice comes out in a whisper. “...Which answer will you want?”

The passing breeze felt so cold, but your reaction felt colder. You squeezed your eyes shut, and Jinwoo felt like both his hearts stopped, the expression on your face so familiar he could almost see it lit up by a red sky. Pained. He doesn’t know who that word applied to more between the two of you at this very moment. You manage a strangled smile as you raise your eyes back to him again, eyes glittering with unshed tears and “You’re being really unfair right now, you know?”

Monarchs and Sovereigns above, of course he knew that. How could he not when you’re right in front of him and after all that’s changed between you both over the time, he still finds himself here – making you cry.

“Why now?” you laugh, pressing the heels of your palms to your eyes. Although he wanted to believe otherwise, were you trying to erase him from in front of you? Did you ever think of a hill of flowers before you went back to Korea and saw him again?

“I know. I know that it’s wrong. And I’m so sorry.” he swallows and tries to push through. This was going to hurt. But he needed to get this off his chest – the two hearts inside him were praying for the best. “I just– This isn’t about Ashborn anymore, I swear it. The time I’ve spent with you are some of the best I’ve had. I’ll even be bold to say they’re my favorite. No matter how few they are, but that’s just how much I treasured them.”

“Jinwoo…” you laugh sadly, and when you raise your head to him for a second, your eyes are shifting waters of divinity and mortality. When your voice comes out again,  “I told you before, right? Don’t force yourself. Maybe the heart inside you is just forcing you like mine-”

“No. It’s not like that. I know that.” Jinwoo wouldn’t lie. It hurt him a bit. He understands where you were coming from. For so long, he felt like he was being dictated by Ashborn’s feelings for you. But no. He knows it more than ever. “I could lose the heart that gave me my abilities right now. I could go back to being an E Rank hunter. I would still find you.”

You look up at him and for a second, the mortality wins and he almost reaches out to you again. But like lightning, the divinity hits you like a flash and you force yourself to step back from him. You’re breathing heavily, trying to reign in your past self and Jinwoo could only feel turmoil.

He wants to bring you back to the present just like he did back then, but would you even hear his voice? Or would you hear Ashborn? Which one would turn to him 

“But Jinwoo… Zhigang… I…?” you mutter it in between unsteady laughter.  

It hurt, because he knew you were right. This was wrong. This was unfair. And yet, and yet. Jinwoo manages a strangled laugh. Why did he keep talking? What was he trying to achieve? His chest hurts so much, but he knew it was nothing compared to you. So why did he keep hurting you like this? 

Ashborn was wrong. This wasn’t going to fix things at all. But Jinwoo knew – maybe because they’ve been entwined so deeply now, in body and love for you – that Ashborn was clinging to the smallest of chance that they’d take you away from Liu. Desperate to save you from a similar fate. Desperate to save you from the past and join you in the future.

He promised you forever in another life, didn’t he? 

“Can I just know? Did you… the you in the present… feel anything for me, too? At least a little bit?”

“I…” But you don’t get to finish, just staring at him hopelessly. Jinwoo watches as your eyes shift from divinity to mortality, from past to present, to uncertainty and more doubt. Maybe realizing he could see the confusion as clear as day on your face, you press your hands over your eyes again, willing to keep your feelings at bay.

He wants to reach out, and for a second he found it so funny. Back then, he was always the one who wanted to pull away, always told you not to get too close, but now… 

Jinwoo watches as tears slowly spill from past your hands and down your cheeks. He hesitantly reaches out to brush them away, give comfort however you need that would right every wrong he’s ever done to you. 

However, before he can say or do anything more, someone stands behind you. Jinwoo straightens up and curses at himself for not noticing sooner, too lost in the moment, but he’s unable to take a step forward, frozen. An enraged glare pins him in place, and for just a moment once more, he felt like he was an E Rank hunter again, unable to do anything more than watch as he stood before something more than he could ever be, something he could not match, despite knowing otherwise.

Liu Zhigang holds a hand over your eyes, as if shielding you from a potential threat. He wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you flush against his chest and farther away from Jinwoo, even if it was just a few steps away. Liu doesn’t look away even once, controlled rage all over his face as he slowly turns his body to push you behind him in protection. Jinwoo’s hearts were hammering in his ears – eyes shifting from the glare of an angered National Level hunter and, from what he could see of you behind your lover, the woman he loved clinging to his back in desperation.

“Hunter Sung,” Liu’s voice is deathly quiet but could be heard clear as day even in the vast open space. It seemed to command the very air. “Did you just make my lover cry?”

Jinwoo was starting to think that just being in your presence made him ten times more stupid. He felt like he always lost the idea to think, always at a loss for words. He felt it now more than ever.

Because how was he going to deny that when there you were right behind Liu, gasping as you cried and clutching the back of his shirt. To other people, it might have looked like you were over exaggerating in your reaction or that he had done more than just admit his feelings for you.

Liu reaches out behind him and one of his sheathed swords appears behind him. He grips at the hilt of it and in a split second, your hands hold down his wrist, Hae-in takes a defensive stance, ready to break up the ensuing fight and Jinwoo’s daggers are in his hands. The shadows beneath the monarch grow restless.

“Zhigang,” you choke out. “Stop, don’t, please.”

“Rìluò, don’t tell me to stop when this bastard can’t seem to treat you like a proper friend.” Liu makes the words out through gritted teeth, the grip on his sword tightening. 

That seemed to hit you both at the same time as you and Jinwoo flinched. It held more weight than one. Liu was right, Jinwoo had been acting out too much the moment he saw you again. And despite your efforts, the past you kept rearing her head, drawn to the familiar presence of her past lover in his vessel. For yourself… Jinwoo wasn’t too sure if it was the guilt of how it must have all looked like to Liu or…?

“What kind of friend makes you sob like that, Rìluò? If this is his version of friendship, not really sorry to say, but I don’t want it for you. You don’t deserve this.”

You swallow, and you shift on your feet. Jinwoo thinks you’re slightly swaying. “…Zhigang, please, can we go back home for no-?” 

You don’t get to finish. Because in the next second, Jinwoo almost seems to watch in slow motion as your grip on Liu’s wrist loosens. You’re falling. The glimmer in your eyes disappears, and so does the mortality as they grow dull, your whole body shutting down. He yells out to a shadow – any of them, desperate, oh so desperate – and Beru comes out before he can even finish. The shadow ant catches you before you hit the ground.

Liu turns around in a flurry and takes you from the shadow’s arms before he could react. For a second, Jinwoo felt Beru’s fury spike, angered at the hunter and he raised one of his arms to strike. Jinwoo’s eyes flash a brilliant purple.

DON’T.

But My King-!

I said don’t, Jinwoo swallows as he watches Liu cradle an unconscious you in his arms, not even bothering to look at the shadow ant in front of him, ready to strike. Jinwoo thinks of a red sky and health potions that look like blood and so much desperation coursing in his veins as he holds your body. He doesn’t have to see the look on Liu’s eyes to know, he can see the tension in his shoulders and the shuddering breathing as he made sure. We’ll… we’ll make things worse. Come back here. You did well. You… did enough. 

Hae-in comes closer and helps check your vitals while Jinwoo stays rooted to the spot, waiting with bated breath as your lover and friend go over your state. 

“She’s fine,” for what felt like an eternity, Hae-in stands, but she bites her bottom lip and swallows hard as she turns to Jinwoo. “But it’s better to send her to a hospital to make sure.”

“Is this what you wanted?” Liu’s voice is deadpan, but Jinwoo felt the hit to the face all the same. He can’t summon the urge to say anything more hostile. Even if you were knocked out, it felt like you’d hear and it would hurt you more than it would actually affect Liu.

“...Hunter Liu, take her somewhere far away from me. Please.” Jinwoo’s voice is devoid of emotion.

“I don’t need to hear that from you,” Liu picks you up effortlessly, and with a last withering glare at Jinwoo, eyes burning a terrifying gold – “I should have killed you the first time.”

Hae-in swallows before letting out a small whisper. “I want to make sure she’s fine. I’ll go with you.”

Jinwoo doesn’t need the player system to know that a threat that could kill him was meters from him. A part of him tells himself that maybe it would be for the best to let Liu go through with it, but the hunter leaves without another word with you in his arms. Hae-in rests a hand over Jinwoo’s shoulder for a second, but she’s unable to say anything more, and she jogs to catch up with Liu.

He stays rooted to the spot for a moment more. Right here was where he was talking to you just moments before. And there was where you lost consciousness, unable to fight your past self. Jinwoo sits on the bench. And on this bench…

Is it finally over for us…? Jinwoo asks. But Ashborn neither agrees or disagrees. Neither of them wanted to know the answer.

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

How many times has Jinwoo been to this park in his life? 

Numerous. He’s been here countless times with his family when he was younger, running around with Jinah with reckless endeavor. Even as he grew older, they had occasional picnics, even if it was just him and his sister. And then he started working out here when he was first made a player. And then he came and went again after he used the Cup of Reincarnation. The most recent ones that come to mind were his picnic with his family and they invited Hae-in to join them. That day was… he thought it might have been the beginning of the end, in a sense. He had thrown you away then, and came crawling back to you a year later. Breaking your heart again in a different way. 

And now here he was again with Liu Zhigang. The hunter had asked – ordered, better said – that Jinwoo meet him in the park in a big enough clearing. Jinwoo immediately knew where he was talking about – the hidden spot of a park bench with the perfect view of the sunset. He should get that park bench removed someday. No one was going to miss it, definitely not him. 

Wasn’t sitting on the bench, however. He was standing slightly farther away, quietly staring into the horizon. He was dressed in his hunter attire, swords carefully sheathed behind him. Jinwoo doesn’t bother preparing his own daggers, or telling his soldiers to be ready.   

Liu insisted on meeting around sundown. 

Jinwoo stands a safe distance beside Liu. Safe for him or the National Level hunter, he wasn’t quite sure. For a moment, he questions if he would win, even with Ashborn’s help, with the heavy guilt weighing down on him, or would he just let it all happen. “How… is she?”

“Fine, although that’s no thanks to you,” Liu snaps back almost immediately, like he knew what the first thing Jinwoo was going to say. 

There’s a pause, and when Liu speaks again, he sounds far away. Reliving a memory that was neither pleasant nor painful. It sounded like a fact he just remembered. “She hates watching the sun set, did you know?”

Jinwoo pauses. “I heard her mention once that she doesn’t watch it, but…”

The answer seems to make Liu angry because he inhales sharply and gives Jinwoo a judgmental glare from his peripheral vision. “...I see.”

A tension filled silence passed between the two of them, too many words that remain unspoken, if only for the sake of keeping things civil enough to see this conversation through. Finally, the glare in Liu’s face passes and something comes over him. He takes a breath in, as if steadying himself, before he passes a hand over his face. Finally he faces Jinwoo. 

“I wish to ask you for a favor.”

“Haven’t asked for enough, I see,” Jinwoo manages a small self-deprecating laugh, feeling faint. He hasn’t had a reasonable amount of sleep ever since that talk with you. All he could see when he closed his eyes was the way you cried, your body on the floor. He imagines himself holding your unconscious body again like he was in the red gate and he feels the bile rise to his throat. “I’m the last person you need that from.”

Liu smirks mockingly. “Don’t worry. I have a feeling this will be the last time.”

Jinwoo manages a scoff. “We’ll see. From past experience your favors aren’t exactly favorable for everyone involved, but let’s hear it.”

Liu pauses, looking at the sunset before turning back to Jinwoo. “I want to ask for your permission. I wish for your full blessing to take care of Rìluò, to bring her with me to China.” 

Jinwoo blinks, unsure if he heard wrong. But Liu doesn’t break into that lazy grin or even laugh at his face mockingly. He looks at him straight in the eye, and to his surprise, there is no glimmer in his eyes that comes when he talks about you or the burning suns when he stands as China’s hero. 

Mortal. Just completely mortal.

And unguarded.  

Jinwoo can’t help but scoff incredulously. “That’s the most idiotic request I’ve heard from you. She’s her own person. As if I have a say in where she wants to-”

“I’m not asking you.” 

Jinwoo frowns, his temper rising. He can only have so much patience with the man who continues to challenge it. But he tries to will it down. “So is this another order from a National Level Hunter disguised as a-”

“Shut up,” And suddenly, it felt like Liu wasn’t looking at him. He was looking through him. “I’m not asking you. I’m asking that heart that continues to beat inside you.” 

The park is eerily quiet. Jinwoo’s rage fizzles out of him, at a complete loss for words. 

“Ashborn… that’s your name, isn’t it?” Liu continues, voice resolute and almost seeming to echo in the open space just like before. The very air crackled with it. It definitely felt like it was ringing in Jinwoo’s ears, and all the way to the soul that rests within him. He was suddenly so aware that he was a Vessel of something very dangerous. “What do you say?”

Jinwoo didn’t even have any time to react. Before he knew it, he was thrown into the back of his consciousness. The whole park is overtaken by darkness, the sunset disappearing in a cloak of black, locking him and Liu into a separate dimension. He can feel how the strongest of his army are summoned around him -- Igris and Iron with their weapons drawn, Beru more than ready to strike, even Bellion’s commanding aura can be felt from his back. Ashborn had complete control of his body at that very moment, and for once, Jinwoo was taken aback by how easily the original Shadow Monarch had access to it. He’s reminded of a previous conversation: Jinwoo may own the body, but as Ashborn said: not completely. Jinwoo, no, Ashborn takes quick steps towards Liu and grips on to his collar, almost dragging him forward. His knuckles are blemished white, but for a split second, Jinwoo could have sworn it was a hand encased in black armor.

“I must have misheard you, Reincarnated Monarch… Murderer of My Beloved. Maybe your mortality has affected your memories and you don’t remember your greatest sin, so depending on what you say next, I may spare enough of you to still resemble something that can be called human.”

Despite Ashborn’s menacing aura, Liu stands his ground. Golden eyes meet blazing purple without looking away, if anything, they seem to burn brighter, trying to overpower him. Jinwoo can make out familiar glittering, and it only fuels Ashborn’s rage to roaring heights. His grip on Liu’s collar tightens and he can hear his shadows grow restless behind him.

“It hurts my pride to admit, but I don’t believe I can win against an actual monarch, or whatever you are. Sorry for not living up to your expectations, but if it helps my case, I’m not what you call a reincarnated monarch, or any kind of reincarnation. I’m very much human.” 

Ashborn frowns and Jinwoo feels the doubt that courses between the two of them. That’s impossible. They know what they saw whenever his hands found the wound on your back, or the way he had the same glowing eyes of the monarch you had seen before you eventually passed. Isn’t this conversation damning proof enough? That he had known about Ashborn before anyone besides you did?

Ashborn scoffs. “Explain yourself. I implore you to make it quick before I decide your words are meaningless to me and the shadows lose their patience."  

“I’m my own person, I know that for a fact.”

“And yet you call my name? Somehow, you simply knew of my existence beforehand? I refuse to believe My Beloved has told you anything about me.” 

Liu mouths Ashborn’s name for you, and for a second he looks away with a tick of his mouth in the corners. Ashborn harshly shakes him once and Liu looks back to him. He almost looks bored. “Listen to me. Memories, that’s all they are. I am not whoever you think I am, and I certainly didn’t murder her. The very idea makes me sick. I’d rather kill myself before I even get a mile closer to her with those intentions.”

“I’d be happy to fulfill that wish of yours.” Jinwoo hears the shadows step closer. 

“Yeah, I bet,” Liu mutters. “But if you even care a fraction for her, then listen to me first. Put the idea of me killing her on the side, just for a moment. Presently, she’s alive, am I right?”

Ashborn pauses, the grip he has on Liu loosening only for a moment before he tightens it again. “As my vessel has said, we have no hold on whether she stays or goes, no matter if we wish to.”

No matter if we begged her to reconsider. She is a wild thing, like a dandelion carried by the wind.

Fleeting, ever so sadly so.

“Maybe not for you, but that’s not the same for her.” Liu frowns, and for a second it’s like he wasn’t being held by the collar by a monarch.

Jinwoo’s heartbeat is in his throat. Ashborn laughs scornfully. “You doubt her love for you? That’s not our concern. That is a failing on your part.”

“Ha. I don’t doubt it, and if you weren’t so angry right now, you wouldn’t either. She’s not like that, and you know it’s true if you’re fighting so hard for her,” Liu laughs once, but it’s empty. “But that’s besides the point. There’s something inside of her that continues to love you.”

Ashborn and Jinwoo pause, and for a second, they sense hope growing within them like a weed. “Forgive me, but I don’t see why I’m meant to see that as something I should stop.”

“Don’t see it, huh? Yeah, I figured you wouldn’t,” Liu clicks his tongue. Before Ashborn could react, Liu unsheathes one of his blades and strikes. He misses, of course, Jinwoo and Ashborn’s body disappearing into shadow. Liu stands a way off as the monarch materializes, glaring at the hunter. “Of course you wouldn’t see it as a bad thing. But that’s not the same for her.”  

“I’m asking the both of you to stay away from her.” To Jinwoo’s surprise, Liu sheaths his sword once more. Jinwoo suddenly feels like Liu is staring past Ashborn and right at him. But it’s almost impossible to think about when Ashborn’s anger was coming back in full force. Even Jinwoo was unable to comprehend what he was asking. “Hunter Sung, you saw what it does to her, right? Another her keeps trying to fight back. You may say that the other one has good intentions, that she is as kind and as lovely as the Rìluò I know, just trying to get a share of life. But she’s hurting Rìluò, isn’t she? I don’t know how you and Ashborn work, but I don’t think it’s the same for her. I don’t think she can live as both at the same time.”

Jinwoo wants to fight back, to retort something. They’ll teach you how to control it again. They’ll figure out a way where you can live peacefully with the past you that has survived all this time. You’ll be fine, just as you did back when you were friends. 

You’ll be fine.

But he thinks of the way that the glimmer overtakes your eyes each time and wonders – what if it completely stays? Then what?   

“You taught her, right? You’re the one who taught her how to control it. I know you did. Are you going to throw all of that down the drain just to keep her beside you, even if it means losing the one in the present?” Liu’s voice raises ever so slightly, like he knew he was getting through to Jinwoo. Ashborn takes a step closer, but Liu doesn’t bother stepping back. His face is resolute. “If she keeps seeing you while clinging to the past, there will come a time she won’t see you, Hunter Sung. You know this.”

The unseen bench is a harbinger, still. Jinwoo may not see it right now, but its presence outside this dimension lingers. He remembers sitting there with you, and how without a second thought – 

You almost called him Ashborn. 

You knew his name by then, meeting him for the first time in the Hunter’s Association. And still, you called out for someone else.

He understood it made Ashborn happy. But you and him are in the present, and Ashborn is simply a being that resides within him now. Is that what he wanted? A version of you that would only cling to him because of a memory of forgotten days? Will you one day wake up and call on Ashborn instead of his name and forget every memory he’s built with you?

Jinwoo opens his mouth to answer – he needs to say something, anything – but his voice doesn’t work.

“And if we… I… refuse?” Jinwoo wants to shut him out at this very moment, but he realizes he doesn’t have to. Jinwoo feels the shadows behind him slowly go back to the abyss. Ashborn’s voice is uncharacteristically soft, but still on edge.

Liu’s hand reaches for his swords again. “Maybe I don’t stand a chance against a monarch, but I don’t mind trying. Either I convince you or I die attempting.”

“Stupid enough to admit you’re weak, too proud to try anyway. And you think you can stand beside her? The chances of you staying alive long enough to convince me first are slim to none.” Ashborn laughs sarcastically.

“Well. If I do die, she’ll know.” Liu shrugs

“So that’s how you plan to win? Showing her that I am a monster who murders her mortal lover?” Ashborn glares at him.

“I don’t think she’ll see you as a monster. I don’t think she’s capable of that. Maybe she’ll think I’m more of one for fighting with you. But if I do die, I know the Rìluò I know will end up staying away from you. So I’ll lose, and the idea is unconventional and cruel, but I still get what I want for her.”

There’s a pause where a sinking feeling crawls at the back of the monarch’s spine.

But also what came with it was insurmountable relief. 

“...You are… not him? You are not a reincarnated monarch like her.”

Liu blinks in surprise. “Not my point on this side of the conversation, but no, I’m not. What made you realize?”

“Monarchs in this day and age know they do not stand a chance against me. They have been weakened, to some degree. And yet if your word is to be believed… you will try for her. That is not something those heartless beings would do. It will hurt me, yes, but not if it meant giving their lives away.”

“If it’s Rìluò, then I don’t mind,” Liu gives a half hearted shrug, and then the lazy smile is back, his head lost in a memory. Jinwoo doesn’t have to guess what he’s thinking about. “I would’ve kicked the bucket a while back anyway. Came back a couple of times thanks to her. I owe her for that and much more.”

“...I see…”

It’s quiet, suffocatingly so. The darkness and the lack of a reply from both parties ended up making things stifling. Finally, Jinwoo feels himself take back the body, Ashborn silently handing over control. The darkness that surrounds the both of them slowly ebbs away, and what remains is a moonless night sky.

“Let me know what you think. Rìluò’s still at the hospital. They’re running some tests just to make sure she’s fine,” Liu breathes out a sigh. “You… should go see her when you can. Whichever decision the both of you make. We left on bad terms in front of her, after all. I don’t want her to feel it was all her fault.”

Without waiting for an answer, Liu walks away. 

Jinwoo stares at the horizon, his head and hearts as silent as a grave. There was only a single thought in Jinwoo’s mind, however.

Igris.

In a flash, the shadow knight appears and slashes at the bench behind him. The crack and splinter of wood echoes among the trees. And then all is quiet again. But it does nothing to calm the hammering in Jinwoo’s ears.

That bench was nothing but trouble. Ashborn agrees. 

=O=O=O=O=O=O=

“Thanks for everything, Jinwoo.” 

The end comes regardless, that is what Jinwoo has come to realize.

You were leaving. You were finally going. He wanted to hold you back. To think things through.

If he pulls you to his chest, will that help? He’ll pull you to his chest and you will hear him, won’t you? You will know that he is still there, and you’ll stay with them?

Ashborn whispers something, so softly Jinwoo thought he misheard. So softly he prayed he misheard.

She will be late for her departure. It’s time. 

He bites the inside of his cheek, but offers you a small smile. Hae-in smiles through tears and gives you one more lingering hug. Liu comes up from behind you, but for once Jinwoo doesn’t even bother glaring holes into him. He felt… exhausted, in a sense. He continued to look at you, burning the memory of you into his mind because – without you knowing, and maybe you never will know – it will be his last time having a memory of you that is purely his, and not Ashborn’s.   

He takes a step back and you turn around. Liu holds out a hand that you readily take into your own. Gold eyes find dull purple eyes and give them a single nod. Was he still in control of the body? It certainly felt like not. He’s not strong enough to watch the plane leave, so he turns around with all intention to leave and Hae-in doesn��t stop him.

Was Ashborn watching? He felt like he was falling into a deep slumber – until he saw something familiar. Something no longer their’s. Something they felt like they were intruding upon.

The hill of flowers is quiet. Jinwoo just noticed the flowers are all purple, splattered with red and gold. He thinks he’s never hated that hill more until now, but he sits down and leans against the large tree anyway. The sky glows red with a setting sun. He waits for a familiar figure, but no one comes. Ashborn closes his eyes. 

Just once more.

It’s quiet, all for the passing breeze stirring the grass and leaves awake. And then, they hear it. 

The grass rustles as someone carefully steps closer. They think they’re imagining it, so they don’t make a move. They think it’s too good to be true, so they don’t open their eyes. Whoever it is, they stop short, right next to them and pause. Then slowly, the monarch hears someone sit down, feel their heat right next to them. The newcomer does not say anything.

Ashborn doesn’t open his eyes, and neither does Jinwoo. 

They don’t watch the sun set. They don’t think they’re strong enough to. 

Just once more, they think.

If you feel like listening/watching me brainstorm the fic or just see my first draft of it, here's a video I recorded for it. Use it as a Write With Me if you feel like it - it's got typing sounds, music and, of course, my yapping:

✨ Masterlist ✨ KOFI/Commissions

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine and belong to their respective creators. Their portrayal is merely my own interpretation of them and may not be accurate to their intended characterization. I stake no claim to the original works, only to the ideas and plot of the fictitious stories I’ve written them into.

[itstheendofthegoddamnworld]

Comfort for the Soul Part 2

Bob Reynolds x Thunderbolts*!Reader

Part 1

A/N: I really hope you guys enjoyed the previous chapter! Thank you all for the support and love - I love writing this sweet man and I may be writing more for him in the future!

I don't know much about Bipolar disorder, but I tried my best to look more into it to make Bob seem more realistic. It's easy to make Bob and his other 'personalities' similar to DID, but it is not at all the same.

Summary: When you realise your supply of blood bags have run dry, Bob is more than willing to become your temporary blood bag.

Tags: blood, swearing, blood drinking, reader is part vampire (think Blade - day walker and backstory explained a bit more), Bob is very touch starved and very smitten, fluff, pet names, Bob feels some self-doubt, mentions of the Void, making out, getting caught, Bob and reader being possessive, some 18+ moments (Bob gets a boner a few times)

Wordcount: 4,6k

E/C = eye colour

L/N = Last name

Lo and behold, Valentina was not true to her word; those three days suddenly went to five.

Your frustrations were greatly felt throughout the tower, much to the dismay of your team-mates, awkwardly giving support to their best of their knowledge.

It wasn't their fault they didn't know much about day walkers; they had been a rarity, but even you found their curious questions became something far too comical.

"Can't she just eat a squirrel?" John had finally asked at dinner, the group of you giving him varying looks of disbelief. "There's plenty in the park."

"She's part vampire, Walker, not a dog," Ava argued.

"It's fine, guys, I'll live." You chewed on the steak Alexei had offered to cook for you. A plain, on the verge of being a medium rare steak, nothing else to go with it.

Despite his help, he almost forgot about it a second too long, so the juices weren't as plentily. As Walker described it, "you might as well still eat it whilst it's still mooing."

The group didn't discuss anything on it, putting out ideas of what the evening should be: games, movie, trivia night, but your mind was distracted by the kind, thoughtful gesture that Bob had offered to you.

He had been keen on offering himself up as your temporary meal for only three days, but whether he would want to continue this for a few more was something you needed to bring up with him.

It didn't help; you could still see the band-aids he wore underneath his sweater, and the flesh was still healing.

Your mouth watered, the way he sat so snug in his comfy clothes didn't help your situation, sweet, oblivious Bob, unaware of how you were feeling. It took a lot in you now that you had gotten a taste of him, not to just keep pouncing on him every five minutes.

The group had gotten into a debate on films, which ones to watch, and only those that bring your attention back to them.

"If we do watch Star Wars, which ones - prequels or originals -Bob, why don't you pick?" Yelena had brought the attention back to Bob, whose attention had been given to shyly looking over at you when he thought you weren't looking.

"Uh-sorry, what were we talking about?"

"Ugh, see? He was too busy giving love eyes to YN!" Walker gestures, but none of them go further into it. Rather, Bob is left with the comment swimming in his mind, his eyes trailing to you to see if you are just as embarrassed as he is.

You give a sympathetic smile, one that doesn't pity him, and you don't make him feel worse. He feels relieved you don't look at him any differently; rather, your attention has shifted.

The heavy debate seemed to bring the worst out of Walker and Ava, disagreeing that "the prequels were better" or "no, originals are the best, we have to start with that and the order they came out in"

You cut them off before you can stomach their growing voices, "Hey guys, I might sit this one out-"

"Oh, no, you're not, L/N!" Walker and almost half of your team shouted out, before Bucky sighed, muttering, "Fuck it, prequels it is," before going to set it up in the living room.

"Hey," a small voice called to you, a nudge to the shoulder as you looked briefly from your unfinished meal to see Bob had made his way over to sit next to you, "something up?"

"All good," you whispered back, but you knew you had to ask him soon enough, "are you free after this? Need to ask you something."

"Of course." He smiled broadly, the smile lines in his face made him look boyish and youthful. Despite taking a chunk out of him the previous night, he seemed to be soothed by being in your presence.

You can't say anything else to him before you're whisked over to help with popcorn duty with Yelena, and Bob is dragged by Alexei to the couch.

"Hey, saved you a seat," Bob motions gently to the space beside him on the long sofa. You realise that he's in the curve of the L in the couch, and despite the length of the couch, you find that the space between you is practically nothing.

You scooch through as you take a seat, finding yourself rather cosied up beside him. Shoulders and legs touching, you realise he's emitting way too much heat to be humanly possible. There's a nervous, bashful look to him, like he's scared you're too uncomfortable being so close to him.

"Is this okay?" He whispers close to your ear when everyone has settled, the lights go off, and the movie intro starts. You notice his hands are fidgeting again, and on reflex, you take them into yours.

The jitteriness stops immediately, feeling the way Bob tenses again as if he's never felt you touch him before, his blue eyes flash with the light coming from the TV, and he looks ethereal with the backdrop of New York behind.

"I'm good." You give his hand a squeeze, your little message to him that you're next to him, not going anywhere.

He seems to relax into the bundle of blankets over you, and by the time the movie ends, you feel sluggish, warm, your head resting against his good shoulder, eyes drifting in and out of sleep.

"The lovebirds are at it again." You hear a voice, maybe Walker, but it sounds too happy, too pleased to see this; the sight of Bob reciprocating your touch, his eyes shut as he breathes deeply in a sleep.

You're so caught up in Bob and sleep, ignoring the snickering, the giggles, maybe even the sound of a phone camera shutter. You just feel so part of his life, and the feeling, unbeknownst to you, is reciprocated.

The group go back to their rooms, leaving the lights dimly lit as you slowly come around after a quick snooze, with Bob groggily joining you.

His brown locks are poking at random angles, his hair tousled but there is a sleepy, dreamy look to him when his eyes land on you beside him, realisation dawning on you both.

"Oh, guess the movie is done." His voice surprises you with how deep it sounds, "Surprised s'all."

"How come?"

"Usually, they're so loud," he laughs more to himself softly, his eyes twinkling in the dim light, "can't believe I wasn't thrown a pillow to the face for potentially snoring."

"Well, you're in luck, I didn't hear snoring," he matches your smile, relieved to hear that. You shift, feeling something had snaked around you.

Looking down, you spot Bob has not quite noticed he's wrapped himself around you, a hand on your waist, almost possessively, keeping you glued to his side.

"Sorry!-" He realised a second later when he sees what you're looking at, pulling back, but you immediately miss him, the way he feels around you, his scent, his overall being.

It's okay- you want to tell him- I like you being close- but you stop yourself from embarrassing yourself and admitting to it. You rake your fingers together, collecting the right words.

"Bob, I-"

"You... haven't fed properly, all day," he begins, eyeing you carefully. He sees it in the way your eyes are more frantic, you're jittery, and there's a sheen that looks like sweat across your brow.

You look at him, your heart pounding almost out of time to its normal beat, as Bob pulls back his sweater carefully, revealing the other side of his untouched skin. You feel the heartbeat there, strong, slightly fast.

"You can always... have some more now?" He asks, the softness in his voice is as if he's luring you out like a siren in the waters. It entices you easily, and you wish to just climb on top of him and commence there, but you're still cautious.

"Not here," you warn, and you look away from him, trying to ignore the briskness and liveliness coming from his chest. "If we were to do this, it would have to be in a room- yours maybe-"

"How about yours?" He asks, and the question has you wondering why he chose yours and not his. "I mean... only if you want...there's nothing against using my room-"

"My room it is then." You stand up abruptly, startling him, taking him by the hand as you both not-so-subtly scurry together down the hallway.

Bob doesn't think he's ever been more nervous in his life to be entering someone's bedroom, let alone it being yours.

He feels similar to some teenage boy sneaking off to a girl's room, an experience he never had but is all too giddy in finally getting to try it.

Bob doesn't know what he thinks he's going to experience when he comes into your room. Walker's 'vampiric' stereotypes run through his mind, and he's oddly curious but fully aware you won't have blood on the walls, upside-down crosses hanging everywhere.

Your hand has not left yours since you thumb the door quickly, efficiently, opening it without a second thought, as you allowed him to step in first, you following.

He's certainly not expecting your room to look so... normal?

No coffin to sleep in.

No dead animals hanging around.

Just a simple, normal bedroom, filled with a slightly above-average number of plants.

You have a bookshelf of books of different genres he's read, old vinyls and a player sitting by your window, a pair of cosy slippers sitting by the end of your bed.

Bob notices a sketchbook half-scattered on your desk and is amazed that you like to draw. There's a familiar scent of vanilla or coconut or something fancy that Bob can't place what it is, but it's warm and smells like you, and he slowly feels enveloped by it.

There are fairy lights strewn over the top of your bed, hanging like hundreds of fireflies, and Bob thinks, no doubt, that this room is undeniably yours.

"Make yourself comfy." You say behind him, as Bob clumsily makes his way to your bed, stunned, the sheets feel so soft compared to his; he sinks into the mattress rather than the one in his room that makes him feel like he's sitting on bedrock.

His mind drowns him with unwanted thoughts: thoughts of imagining the two of you curled up with one another, sharing a space that was intimate in itself for just letting both of you be one.

"Bob," he looks up as he realises he's caught dissociating, looking to see you hovering by the door, eyes flashing between E/C and those golden-white ones, "you're so pretty."

The compliment rattles through him: body, mind and soul. He's opening and closing his mouth erratically, noises anyone would not think could be humanly possible to make are are you both can hear. He's scrambling to think of something to say, thinking- his mind screaming with different thoughts of things to say back to you.

"You're pretty, too-gorgeous even! Um, like pretty in the face and body-oh, that sounds so creepy, hah-not like I'm staring at your body, I swear!-"

A giggle echoed in the softness of your room, and his heart hammers as if ready to be reached to and ripped from him. How someone like you can listen to him, even want to be with him, makes his mind spiral.

"You think I'm pretty, Bob?" You're lightly teasing him, stepping closer to him, observing him like he's prey, and he's sweating profusely, wishing he were doused in holy water for his racing thoughts. "Gorgeous?" You continue until you stand in front of him.

He's looking anywhere by at you, so scared he's going to mess things up, ruin your friendship if he does something-says something, and to watch everything he's tried making with you burn away.

He wishes the mattress could sink him further and further down into a nothing space, but he's so sure you can feel everything. Soft fingers hold his chin to make him look up at you, and all you do is smile down at him, and Bob feels weak.

"Do I scare you, Bob?" He hears it, the soft gravel in your tone, the growl that grips your question. You're ravenous, and he's enjoying this way too much.

"No," his voice is a shudder, his fingers fidget in wanting to touch you again, and he finds that they move on their own, moving tentatively over your hips, his eyes not leaving yours. "I'm not scared of you."

Humming, you lean over him until your mouth grazes lightly over the shell of his ear. "May I," he thinks you're going to ask something else, "bite you?"

He's so happy to be a part of this, nodding his head so enthusiastically that you fear it will roll off, presenting his neck to you as his anticipation rises. He forgets to take his sweatshirt off, but it doesn't matter, you have enough room.

You don't waste time this time, and Bob gasps all the same as before when you bite into him. This time, now being in the confines of four walls, his noises are louder.

"O-Oh." He whimpers unapologetically, large warm hands grip suddenly at you with the strength that still stuns you, pulling you until you're practically hovering over his lap. Bob doesn't stop there, finally tugging you as you move with him, leg sweeping over and caging him in.

His Adam's apple bobs, fingers holding you by your thighs, your waist, trailing higher towards your ribs, all whilst trying to concentrate on his breathing, despite hearing the rush of blood leaving his head.

He shifts you in his arms, and a rookie mistake is made by him, for he accidentally shifts you a bit too far forward. Your core catches his crotch, rubbing unintentionally the more you move.

Bob whines in the back of his throat, tears well in his eyes. It feels so good, but he feels terrified, having himself wrapped around your little finger. He wishes he could stay here, in your arms, embracing you for as long as possible.

You growl in the back of your throat, not human, the sound reverberates through from Bob's neck down into his chest, hammering like a bell. He thinks you're going to lose control, and he's ready to bring you back.

"Fuck, baby, I've got you." The pet name slips out quicker than he realises, but it feels good from him, earning a low whine to come from you.

It's sudden, but you love it; the word goes straight to your core shamefully. "I've got you-I've got you." Bob feels the rush of endorphins from it, the way he feels so trusted by you in his arms.

Your thighs tighten around him, trying to stop yourself from gyrating on top of him despite how tempting it is. He doesn't seem opposed to it; your bodies move to help you get better access to his neck, creating a gyrating movement that anyone who came in would see would be obvious, indicating that the two of you were making out.

There is something sensual building, unfamiliar, but it seems so normal for both of you, blossoming into something undeclared, personal.

Your mouth withdraws from his skin, a harsh, ragged exhale leaves you as if you've been choking down on air. Leaning over him, your faces are far closer than usual.

Bob works on instinct and does the unthinkable, his fingers tracing over your cheekbone, tucking back a piece behind your ear.

"You're so pretty," you whisper, like the two of you are sharing heartfelt secrets between one another. Your bloodied lips trace over his ear once more, and Bob finds himself struggling to breathe. "Such a pretty boy."

Bob groans louder than he expected, squeezing your hips, his legs tense and untense, trying to move you off his crotch as quickly as possible. The words hit him as if he were awaiting the waves to crash down on him; the suspense kills him, but he's more terrified of making the wrong move. He doesn't want to scare you off.

"You-you have no idea what you do to me." His voice comes out hoarse, deeper than expected, his blue eyes flash momentarily to a warm golden hue, then back to their usual.

You know he's nervous about engaging in something so new, balancing that with the possible fear that there might also be a part of him that is trying to make him feel the lowest.

Bob shakily exhales, pushing his face into your torso, hugging you a little tighter when he feels himself overworking his mind. That you're using him just for some sort of gain, the other part is certain you wouldn't be allowing him to do any of this with you.

'She thinks you're weak.' The Void speaks through him as if he's conversing with it, but Bob doesn't want to think of it. He wants to be enveloped in you, your warmth, your sunshine, not the darkness.

"Bob," you try to draw him out, trying to get him to look up at you, and it takes some prying before his eyes dart up to look at you. He's afraid, afraid he's messed things up, worsened the relationship or friendship between the two of you. "I'm here. You did such a good job."

"I did?" There is a light that comes from him when he hears it come directly from you. He peeks his head out a bit more, uncertain yet tentative.

"Always." You murmur, and the two of you spend some minutes just in each other's arms, telling him how proud you are of him, how good he is to you. He is silent in your arms, letting out small, exhales when he hears compliments come from you.

"You're too good for me." He says after some time, and it hurts to see him doubt himself. "I'm a mess."

"Sometimes that's what makes us us," you hum, stroking back his brown hair. "I wouldn't change you for anything."

The Golden Guardian, he is to some, but to you, he's just Bob, the Bob who makes you feel most like yourself, someone who didn't run away from you the moment they saw you.

Not the monster your parents had cast out so many years ago, selling you off to the military. He's your sanctuary, you're everything he wishes to worship.

"Let me get you cleaned up." You hop off him slowly, rising as you walk to the ensuite. You linger for a bit before disappearing, holding his hand to steady him, to help him through his breathing before he's sure he's okay.

"Sure-not going anywhere." Bob exhales, crashing backwards onto the sheets, trying to hide the obvious 'problem' that had grown in his sweatpants.

It's another two nights that pass before you see Bob's confidence begin to build. It's small, subtle, but there in the way he walks, how he talks to you and others. It's blinding, and you feel strangely clingy when you're not near him.

It's game night this time around in the Avengers' tower, pizza boxes strewn across the couch, beers and wine flowing as conversation comes easily, laughter too.

Music softly plays of some club song you've never heard of, watching in amusement as a drunk Alexei tries dancing in time to it, spurred on as he's cheered by almost everyone watching.

Yelena watches on in cringe, muttering as she looks anywhere but onwards, suddenly feeling that the music needs to be changed as she hurries off. The others cheer on as Alexei laughs with a bellowing roar, the beer in hand nearly spilling as he moves.

"What fun!" He's loud, louder than normal, your ears ring at the noises around you, but you feel your eyes drifting over Bob too many times to Bob.

He's been quiet, silent in his laughter as he observes everything around him, as he sips slowly at his Sprite. You're awestruck by him, so absorbed in staring at him, not feeling the couch dip on your right. Yelena has snuck her way to sit beside you, startling you as she whispers to you.

"You're drooling."

You react quickly, wiping your mouth to find nothing as Yelena laughs, watching the way you try to avoid her eyes and the attention of anyone else. "When were you going to tell me you and Bob were seeing each other?"

The music doesn't seem loud enough, and you wish to drown in it. You feel like people are staring, even when they're not. You downplay the situation as you nervously laugh, "What are you talking about, Lena?"

"I mean, when I saw Bob leave your room two nights ago."

The glass of wine almost crushes in your hand from how you're gripping it, your heart thrums uncontrollably. You're quiet for a second too long, and Yelena is given all the proof she needs that something is going on.

"It's cute," She whispers, ignoring the way you're trying to cover your face. Bob glances back at the two of you curiously, trying not to eavesdrop. "The two of you- so cute together."

"We're not-it's not-"

"You don't have to say anything, L/N," she winks, her smile wicked, "I know."

She's quickly gone before you can explain things, proclaiming that it was time to take Alexei back to his room before he does anything further embarrassing. You watch as it takes a team effort of Walker, Ava and Yelena to drag the larger Russian man out, laughing to yourself as you hear the mumbled struggles, Alexei slurring his words.

You snuggle into the couch, enjoying the silence after some time, a comfortable, not awkward one fills the air as you look up, seeing Bob shyly looking your way already.

"You want to join me?" You beckon him over as he stands from the beanbag, shuffling quietly in a pair of almost matching slippers you had bought for him when he said he wished he had a pair.

You both sit in silence again, listening to the sounds grow quieter, a hum of the kitchen light, a honk from a car outside. It's peace that you love sharing with Bob.

You put down your glass of red, head swimming with a need for a distraction, eyes trailing over Bob as if you're undressing him with your eyes. "Ready?" You ask when you're certain everyone is occupied.

Bob nods, placing his cup down, shuffling closer to you until you straddle him with ease. He takes it naturally, a long exhale leaves his lips as you feel bolder in teasing him, tracing your fangs lightly over his skin, feeling previous bites have slowly begun healing with time.

"Please, Y/N," he whines, and you hush him sweetly, taking your time with him. "I know, sweetie, I'm here for you." Your voice drops a bit lower, and you revel in sensing his heartbeat pick up faster when you move over him.

He's so obedient, and it makes your mind wander to how he would be as a partner. Your thighs clench, and you lean into his shoulder, relieving him of the wait.

He grunts, not as loudly as before, as you drink slowly from him, sensually, hips rolling as you're taken up in a lull. Your mind short-circuits, you forget where you are, so emboldened by him and his words of encouragement, his hands guiding you.

You shock him, though, when you press kisses into his neck, trailing up his jaw as you leave bloody kiss marks the higher you go. Bob stares up at you, mesmerised, licking his lips unintentionally to see your bloody mouth.

You can't stop yourself now, and the words that come next from you take you to the final step.

"Want a taste?"

Bob swallows thickly, eyes trailing from your mouth to your eyes, glowing, then back down to your lips. He's hungry in a way you don't think someone like him would be, but he's so sweet in how he pleads. Morbid curiosity has taken over, but he's aware of how you mean to let him taste his blood.

"Please-yes please." You don't know who leans in first, but lips envelop yours, soft and warm. Bob tastes the iron on his lips, strong, and he thinks that you must've turned him at some point-because why is he so obsessed?

Your kiss starts slowly, testing the waters as you pull back inches from him to gauge his reactions, smiling when he chases your lips before diving in for more.

You're so caught up in it all, kissing him, feeling him move beneath you, the way he whispers your name. He kisses you a bit harder now, his tongue swipes curiously over your bottom lip as he tastes a bit more, kissing openly and a little bit more brazenly.

The elevator rises slowly, neither of you noticing, hands touching in places as Bob feels over you tentatively, whispering that pet name you love oh-so-much.

The doors to the elevator chime open. Bucky is tired from a full day of meetings, talking to congress, and wishing for a drink and bed, turning on the light as he's in his own world-

"Oh, what the fuck!"

You pull off, leaning back onto the couch and off Bob slightly, when you hear the voice behind you. Bob still holds you, trying to shield himself as you watch Bucky with equal parts shock and annoyance.

"It's not what you think-"

"No, I'm just going to pretend I didn't walk in on this." Bucky sounds like a disappointed dad as he averts his gaze from the two of you.

The shock brings hurried footsteps to approach, Walker is the first to round the corner to the scene. "Oh fuck-What the fuck, Y/N?"

Ava and Yelena are making small murmurs as they look over it as well. Ava is like Bucky, looking the other way, but Yelena is smiling- fucking smiling- as she gives the thumbs up your way.

"I get you want to get in each other's pants," Walker continues, "but I didn't think I was going to walk in on you eating Bob!"

To them, it made sense that it looked like they walked in on a crime scene: Bob is covered in blood. His mouth, neck and most of his face are smeared. His hair is tousled beyond saving, his sweater is pulled and covered in blood. You've done terribly in trying not to stain the couch, but blood has splattered onto the pillows and blanket.

You try to explain yourself, but there is a noise that has entered the room that feels primal, sudden.

The growl to emit in the room does not come from you, and surprisingly, everyone turns their head directly to who is beneath you.

"Get out." Bob's voice is low, commanding, and it brings everyone in the room to feel a sense of apprehension. This doesn't sound like him; his voice is his own, but it holds power, strength.

The grip around your waist is hiding his excitement from the others, but it is possessive as he repeats the same words, louder this time, somewhat more demanding. "Get. Out."

Everyone moves as if on autopilot. Yelena and Ava scoop a confused Walker out of the room. Bucky shakes his head as he walks the other way down to his room. There is nothing said again from them as they leave the two of you in complete silence.

"Holy shit," you utter when there is no noise, no giggles, no words of astonishment. Looking down towards Bob, he's so caught up in being with you that he hasn't even clocked what happened. "That-that was hot."

Bob blushes as he pulls you down to his level, kissing you deeply to either occupy your thoughts with him again or to shut you up. You greedily kiss back, knowing the next day, breakfast will bring many questions and awkward 'birds and bees' conversations, but you don't care, not when you're with your Bob.

[redflagshipwriter]

Check Yes (to go on a date with a dead guy)

Chapter 1

The expectant smiles froze on his siblings’ faces.

Jason blinked, still shaking off the disorientation of the green twisting blur that always came when he took his turn with tHe RitUaL. “What?” he said. It came out defensive. Usually they were all laughing by this point.

Dick reached out and took the post-it off his forehead. “We may have misunderstood this sacrificial thing.” He frowned at the note.

Jason tore it away and flipped it around to read it.

“...Please stop the bridal sacrifices,” he read, voice instantly trembling with the need to laugh. Holy shit. “Proposal is kinda forward. But if you really want, I’d totally go on a date with you. Check yes or no. Danny.” There were two smiley faces after the name and a scribbled drawing of a human looking guy with tall hair.

The batcave was in total, mortified silence. The ritual that had become their pre-patrol goof-off activity of choice had maybe… maybe been a mistake?

“I’m kinda hurt,” Dick broke the silence. “I’m marriageable. I’m a catch, even.” He was joking, but Jason was pretty sure that it wasn’t totally baseless. Who would look at Dick and then choose Jason, of all the people?

Stephanie snorted. “It’s probably your reputation as Ritchie Rich,” she soothed. “I’m sure if this… is it the same guy every time?” She blinked, clearly distracted from her original thought. “Have we all been proposing to Danny day after day?” She wondered. She started counting on her fingers.

“Twice last week,” Tim said thoughtfully. “I proposed to him twice last week.” A line formed between his brows. “I should probably tell Bernard, huh?”

“We must communicate with whoever this Danny is,” Damian said immediately. “If this realm possesses both animal life that resembles our fauna and sentient beings capable of the bad judgment necessary to select Todd as a suitor over Richard, we must know more.”

Jason made a face at Damian and flipped him off, but didn’t disagree. “How is this supposed to work?” He waved the post-it. That did imply some modernity, at least. They were communicating with someone who had stationary. “If I was going to check it, would he know what I picked? Or would I have to– should be bride sacrifice a notebook back and forth?”

“A notebook,” Tim said scathingly. “We can do better than that. A communicator, a phone.”

“Who says Danny has signal, dingbat,” Jason shot back. “He’s probably out of the service area.”

Cass took the paper out of his hand and peered at it. “Yes or no,” she asked, cutting off the disagreement before it could get heated.

He didn’t have to think about it. “Yes,” Jason said, mischief in every line of his body. “I gotta see where this is going. We should at least meet the guy.”

“He said you were tempting!” Dick gasped. He grabbed Jason by the arm and clung on. “Remember? The first time? You’re his type!”

Damian made a ‘gross’ face, features scrunched up like an unhappy cat. Stephanie ‘ooooed’ like she was watching a wrestling match. Cass merely looked thoughtful.

Jason shook his annoying brother off and kept him at a distance with a palm on Dick’s forehead.

“Oooh, the void boy has a crush on you,” Stephanie teased. “You’d be such a beautiful bride, Jason.” She didn’t react to Cass reaching into her hip pouch and withdrawing a sparkly purple pen. Jason loftily ignored Stephanie and watched Cass carefully check YES.

The note disappeared. Cass looked at her empty hand. She flicked the pen between her fingers. Her brow scrunched up.

“Shit!” Jason cursed. “Did-”

The group broke out into an explosion of excited sound.

A throat cleared from the stairs. “Kids?”

Batman stood there, wearing wary suspicion and most of his patrol outfit. He was under the impression that they had agreed to stop sacrificing each other to the green void.

“She took my pen,” Stephanie wailed, instantly switching tracks. Cass backflipped away three times and then leapt directly upwards into the rafters, waiving the purple pen tauntingly. Stephanie chased after her.

“What-”

“Jason won’t let me hug him,” Dick tattletailed. He lunged to grab at Jason. Jason dodged on reflex and threw himself into the scuffle.

“I need to call Bernard.” Tim turned and outright left the Batcave. “I’ll be about five minutes late for patrol, B.”

Bruce watched this chaos with bewildered eyes. “...We leave in ten,” he said, and visibly gave up.

…

The date, when it came, was a fuckin surprise to Jason. He was minding his own business compiling a report on everything the Two-Facers had done last week. (There was a surprising amount of bureaucratic process involved in making yourself the judge, jury, and executioner of people who sucked.)

And then there was a violently green hole in his wall. “Huh,” Jason said, leaning back in his chair. He pulled the handgun out of his desk drawer and cocked it at the portal. “Not sure I care for that.”

“Thanks, wolf,” came a warbled and nonsensical reply. Jason turned off the safety.

His brow furrowed. “What?”

The portal flashed white and it closed. He was lifting his gun to point at the man now standing in his apartment before he’d actually processed that someone had come through. This guy moved fast.

“This is where you live?” The other man was peering around Jason’s apartment. He seemed politely interested at best, and, Jason felt, much less concerned by the gun than he should have been. “I heard bats before. I thought there would be more bats.” His tone was disappointed. He looked at Jason and then flinched his palms out and up, as if he thought he might have come off rude. “Not that you need bats! Or that I’m disappointed by the lack of bats in your decor. In fact you have wonderful, uh, curtains.” He very obviously named the first thing that he saw. He pretended to be fascinated by them. “The red sure is a choice.”

Jason snorted.

“A great choice! I’m not criticizing your home. It’s great.”

Jason realized that if he didn’t say anything to save him, Danny was going to ramble himself into a verbal corner and slink out of the dimension to escape his obvious embarrassment.

“...You hair looks just like in the picture you drew,” Jason said. He put the safety back on. “Hello, Danny.” The name tasted odd in his mouth. It twas just a little pedestrian for the other man– no, teenager, the other teenager.

Danny looked young. No wonder he’d thrown Dic back like the wrong fish.

Jason felt a little less smug about having been the one chosen. Maybe he was just the most age appropriate candidate, not Danny’s type. Timmers was only two years younger, sure, but he was petite enough that it was a little ambiguous.

Danny turned away from Jason’s window and beamed up at him like that was the greated compliment he could have ever received. “I don’t actually have your name! Which is funny, since you kept manifesting in my house.”

God help him, Danny was cute. Jason reached out a hand. “Jason.”

Danny looked at his outstretched hand and then back to his eyes. He blinked. “Are- oh!” He flushed green and his hand shot out to meet Jason’s in what was very clearly the first handshake of his life.

It was a struggle not to laugh. He didn’t wanna make Danny feel bad so he held it in. There was a helpful distraction in that Danny was fascinating to the touch. It didn’t feel like he was touching a human hand. First off, the hand was about the temperature of butter straight from the fridge. Secondly, somehow the physical contact made Jason taste mint in his mouth.

But really, it just… it didn’t feel like human skin. It was too smooth. There was a raised line from a scar, but the texture was as if all the wrinkles and pores of human skin had been polished off. Like if you held the hand of a marble statue and it was somehow also soft.

Jason pulled his hand away before he could wonder too much if that supernatural smoothness extended elsewhere. Ah. Too late. He flushed a little red, even though the only exposed skin was Danny’s hands and face. “So you’re here to uh, set up a date?” he offered.

Danny blinked at him. “Are you busy now? I was thinking now.”

…He was sort of busy. Jason closed his notebooks, only now concerned that Danny might have seen extremely sensitive information. “Nope,” he lied, attention catching on Danny’s freckles. Something about them was pinging as relevant. Was there a pattern? They weren’t symmetrical or anything. Were they fake?

Danny beamed and - he floated up a few inches in his excitement. Holy hell that was cute. “Great!” he enthused. “Should we go to your place or to mine?”

Uh.

Jason turned violently red. “We are already in my place.” His voice came out tight. He- he hadn’t meant that. That was not a first date activity for him.

It took a few seconds for the penny to drop. “Go out in your city or go to the Ghost Zone!” Danny waved his hands frantically. “I’m not being a creep I swear! I mean, we are kind of spiritually engaged but I’m also engaged to– are those people your friends and family?” He was outright horrified. “Oh my GOD, I’m-”

“I would love to take you out around town, but you’ll stand out,” Jason interrupted. He couldn’t hold back the smile. “We can make it work, though. Thoughts on hats and glowing less?”

“Oh, that’s easy.” Danny twitched his hands outward in a motion he probably didn’t even know he was doing. There was another flash of white light that crawled up and down his body.

And Danny one was gone. Danny two stood in Jason’s apartment with dark hair, patched jeans, and a loose t-shirt that hid the musculature his jumpsuit had displayed. He had a full palette switch of his eyes and skin tone as well.

He was obviously the same guy. He just felt more down to earth now.

“Useful,” Jason said, and tugged at his snow-white forelock. “Think you could teach me to change my hair like that?” He was only half joking. It was the bane of his existence when he needed to go undercover. It was too distinctive.

“No, but Doctor Frostbite might be able to sort that out for you,” Danny replied absently.

Jason grimaced instinctively. He knew way too many gimmicky villains to want to do to someone called Doctor Frostbite. “That sounds like the name of a B-tier villain with blue hair.”

Danny paused and clearly contemplated it. “That’s Ember, actually,” which made no branding sense because the word ember evoked warm colors. “Lead the way!” He bounced on his heels, which Jason guessed was his human form equivalent to floating up.

Jason cleared his throat. “I, uh, am gonna want to change.”

For the first time, Danny really looked him up and down and realized that he was wearing a white sleeveless undershirt and black boxers. Jason waited patiently as Danny went through all the stages of grief and social mortification. That didn’t stop Danny’s eyes from followed Jason’s bare arms when he casually lifted one and flexed a little, rubbing at the back of his head. Ha. Eat that, Dick.

“I’m going to go drown myself,” Danny said, now violently pink. Huh, even blushing for a color change. “Can I use your restroom?”

“Stay alive enough to pick between Korean or Mexican,” Jason advised. “I’ll be right back. Should I find you a coat?” He didn’t wait for an answer, frowning at Danny’s bare arms. “I’m gonna find you a coat.” He was already on the way to his bedroom. “It’s freezing out.”

…

[ultimate-marysue]

One of those "Jason decides to leave vigilantism after coming back and just lives his normal life" AU. He doesn't tell his family, he doesn't become Red Hood. Instead, Talia pays for his college and he becomes an English teacher. He fundamentally disagrees with Bruce's methods, but instead of taking it into his own hands to teach him a lesson he decides that's not his problem anymore. New life, new me.

He lives in a normal apartment, gets a couple of rescues to keep him company, makes civilian friends and just leads a completely normal and happy life away from rogues and vigilante drama. And then one year he starts doing the roll call and stares at the name like oh. Oh no.

Lian Harper is in his class.

Cue to Roy romancing his daughter's hot teacher while Jason tries to keep his identity a secret. Roy doesn't recognize him -obviously- he's much older and they weren't that close back when Jason was Robin, but he's one step removed from Dick who would absolutely make the connection. Roy is just really tired trying to keep a job and parent a preteen on top of his nightly activities, and Mrs Peterson is such a breath of fresh air into his very chaotic and intense life.

Lian is torn between wanting his dad to be happy, liking Mr. Peterson because he's a really cool guy and not wanting to be known as "the teacher's daughter". It's a conundrum for her.

Roy is also being tormented because this man is perfect on paper but he doesn't think he deserves normal, let alone perfect. He can't bring himself to trap this upstanding man in the chaos that is his life. Meanwhile Jason is split between his long forgotten crush who seems to be the solution for his miserable romantic life and trying to keep his secret from him.

They flirt, then regret it, then get flustered by the other, then flirt again in a cyclic back and forth that feels safe but doesn't get them anywhere. They keep getting so close to an actual date, but Jason keeps chickening out at the last possible second. The other teachers are desperate for them to resolve their weird tension because sir, this is a place of learning.

Then some villain holds the school hostage while Roy is out of town, and while he gets there Lian and Jason have to keep the rest of the school safe. When Roy arrives Jason knows his cover is blown and he'll probably have to move cities but he's also relieved for the back up. They end up at the Harper's later to patch up and Lian is so excited about the whole thing because her cool teacher is even cooler now, right dad?

Meanwhile Roy, who may not have known the second Robin much but is not stupid, is connecting the dots. These two men are staring into each other's eyes with the intensity of the sun like "don't you dare". They manage to stay civil until Lian retires to shower and from then on it's madness.

Finally Roy understands why "Mr. Peterson" has been rejecting his advances all this time. Jason begs him not to tell his family, he doesn't want to go back after how everything went down and how they seem to have forgotten him. Roy tries to defend Dick but in the end decides to pick his battles and agrees not to tell as long as Jason will finally give him that date they've been talking about. If that's why he said no all those times, of course, if he's not interested then that's fine...but Jason accepts.

When Lian comes back she announces her approval and demands a raise to her grades for her instrumental role in getting them together. She gets a fresh batch of cookies instead, which isn't the same, but will suffice.

[ultimateloserboy]

duck and red guy are not good people.

ive probably said this a million times already but friendly reminder that they’re incredibly grey. they ruin their own lives just as much as the house does it for them, not to mention how theyre responsible for most of the turmoil in yellows life. duck especially loves with his entire heart, but that doesnt stop him from being a piece of shit.

a lot of you watch the series with this idea that the main three are poor innocent babies trapped and helpless when actually, if there was anywhere else to go (which its implied there isnt) red and duck would never fuckin get there because theyre too selfish and stupid to make it.

becky and joe said themselves in a QnA that yellow made it up the stairs alone because red and duck are just too cynical and selfish to ever make it anywhere. the second yellow started heading down the stairs it was over for him, because red and duck will NEVER listen. they want answers but are too stubborn to ever receive them. The house could be unlocked completely and theyd keep themselves there

Not to mention how they treat each other. they either enable each others shitty behavior, or give up on trying to stop each other. red starts to get onto duck for his behavior towards yellow, but then he joins in to make fun of him multiple times. because he doesnt actually care that much, and that apathy can make him cruel

i think a lot of you forget that even as they are normally, even on the regular floor— not even being bigger boys— they DROWNED THEIR FUCKING CAT!!!!!!!!

and they did it together, is what gets me. theyre codependent. theyre all the other really has, the only other adult really to talk to. they completely disagree on everything, having the opposite worldview of each other which causes them to argue constantly— but theyre all the other has. the only one as shitty as themself. they get stuck with each other in the bigger rooms. growing grotesque together, ruining themselves TOGETHER. they get farther apart. they speak to each other less. they torture smaller things for entertainment rather than talking with each other— but theyre still stuck together. glued to each others hip until the world stops spinning, but always being too cowardly and stubborn to be kind to one another and let themselves be happy together.

even when they reach clarity, or they hit an arc that makes them better people— theyll just forget tomorrow, and go right back to being terrible.

theyre not helpless. sure theyre victims, but not perfect ones— and they themselves have victims of their own

and dont even get me started on the mischaracterization of red in this fandom. YES hes just as bad as duck!!! hes not a fucking baby hes a grown ass man!!! he says the same shit as duck all of the time and yall see it differently cuz his voice is nicer to hear or he says it quieter. and may i add— he can be socially awkward and still an asshole. he can be neurodivergent and still an asshole. it doesnt cancel out, you dont have to pick one or the other.

yall take everything interesting out of these characters so you can make them sexymen but to me the sexiest part is the nuance of the character. duck and red are assholes but that doesnt make them unlikable, the show itself proves that. theyre incredibly likeable but still do terrible shit, and yall forget BECAUSE of how likeable they are.

this isnt meant to be some post to make you think theyre bad people that you should hate because thats bullshit. theyre not good people but theyre not overall bad people either. their actions are terrible but at the end of the day they can and have been better, even if only temporarily. there is a part of them that could easily fit into a happy family— a part of them that can heal each other instead of hurt each other. but unfortunately thats the part thats always erased

[twins-write]

Half a Truth is Still a Lie

Pairing: Evan Buckley x Fem!Reader

Summary: Buck finally finds out about Y/N's feelings and asks her on a date... but is it a real date, or just a ploy to make Veronica jealous?

Based on 4x08, when Albert invites Buck to a double date with him and Veronica (he invites her instead of Taylor).

Warnings: None, just a bit angsty. Could be classified as hurt-comfort.

Notes: Finally posting again! I involved a lot of best friend Eddie as well... I couldn't resist. Hope you guys like this one <3

Word Count: 8.06k.

Author Signature: 🦋

The 118 pulled up to the scene they were called to, hopping out of the firetruck, but not taking any action as they watched a negotiator talk to the armed criminal who was pacing on top of the roof.

“And how did he manage to get up there?” Y/N asked with raised brows while Buck and Eddie chuckled next to her, the former shaking his head as he shrugged, “Guess he wanted to try and prevent himself from getting arrested.”

“Looks like he’s doing a good job.” Eddie commented, scoffing in slight disbelief as they stood next to the firetruck, watching the negotiator try his best to talk the criminal down.

“Oh, look- Taylor’s here.” Buck stated, pointing to the reporter that stood a good distance away from them, talking about the incident to the camera.

Y/N rolled her eyes, the girl having not liked the reporter since the day she met her, but for some reason, it seemed Buck had taken a slight liking to her- especially considering he had slept with her before.

That may be another reason Y/N didn’t like her all that much.

“While we sit here doing nothing, let me continue telling you about Veronica and how Albert-”

Eddie groaned, interrupting his friend, “This again?”

“What?” Buck asked in an offended tone while Y/N shook her head at him, “You’ve been talking about them the whole time we’ve been on shift. That’s six hours.”

“So?” Buck scoffed, “You guys are my friends, aren’t you supposed to listen to me rant?”

The girl next to him shrugged, “Yeah, technically, but you’ve been repeating the same thing over and over. We get it- you had a bad date, bad date girl happens to live on the same floor as you, your roommate took a liking to said bad date girl, and bam, you caught your roommate in her apartment in nothing but a towel.”

She then turned and looked at him with raised brows, “Does that sound about right?”

Eddie laughed while Buck sighed in slight defeat, “Yeah.”

“Why are you so mad about it anyways?” The girl asked him curiously, turning her attention back to the male who was pacing on the roof.

“What do you mean? You don’t think I have a right to be mad?” The blonde male questioned.

She shrugged, “I mean… from what you’ve been saying… you didn’t like her all that much. Why do you have a problem with Albert dating her?”

“It’s bro-code!” Buck argued, causing Y/N to turn to Eddie, “Eds, what do you think?”

Eddie raised his hands in mock surrender, “Oh no- do not bring me into this.”

Buck turned to him quickly, “What? Traitor!”

“I didn’t agree or disagree with you!” Eddie replied in slight disbelief that his friend was now annoyed with him.

“Fine. Whatever. I’ll go talk to someone who will listen to me.” Buck said before walking in Taylor’s direction, causing Y/N to scoff, rolling her eyes as she yelled after him, “We have been listening to you for the past six hours!”

Buck didn’t reply nor turn around, only continuing on his path to talk to the red-head, which Y/N realized- releasing a sigh as she watched him begin to converse with her.

Eddie gave her a knowing look, causing the girl to look at him with furrowed brows, “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Looking at you like what?” He asked, giving her the same look- the one that implied that he knew something.

She pointed at his face, “Like that!”

He pursed his lips, giving her a small shrug, “I don’t know, just seems like you’re jealous of a certain someone.”

Then he glanced at Taylor, causing Y/N to follow his gaze. She laughed, “You’re joking, right?”

Eddie raised his brows, “No.”

“I’m not jealous of Taylor- of all people.” Y/N told him, annoyance covering her tone.

Eddie looked away from her, mumbling something under his breath.

The girl looked at him and spoke sarcastically, “I’m sorry, did you say something?”

He repeated himself so she could actually hear him this time, “Maybe you’re just jealous that Buck is giving her attention because you see him as more than a friend and he doesn’t realize it.”

“I-” She began, only to stop talking, knowing he was right. The girl sighed, leaning her back against the fire engine, allowing her head to thunk into the side, “You’re right.”

“I know.” Eddie chuckled, leaning next to her and patting her shoulder gently, “You should just tell him.”

“And, what? Make every shift awkward? No thanks.” She said, shaking her head at his suggestion.

“I don’t think that’s how it’d turn out, but okay.” The Diaz male shrugged, deciding to drop the conversation as they walked closer to the rest of their team- minus Buck.

Her and Eddie stood to the left side of Hen, who was sitting down on the side of the fire engine, Chimney and Bobby standing to Hen’s right.

The group sat quietly, listening to the criminal yell while he walked around the roof, “You shut up! You’re a liar! You said you’d help me find a way out.”

“I didn’t mean with a helicopter.” The negotiator quickly replied, gaining a shout from the criminal, “Shut up! I need to think!”

“Eh… should’ve tried thinking before he ended up on a roof.” Eddie stated, shoving his hands in his pockets and leaning against the side of the engine again, “I mean, he cornered himself.”

“That there is a whole series of bad life choices culminating in this one unfortunate moment. It’d be tragic if it wasn’t so moronic.” Hen replied.

“Why don’t they just storm the roof?” Chimney questioned, “It’s not that high. We can give ‘em a ladder.”

Bobby shrugged, “It’s a tactic negotiators use to drag out the process in order to wear down the suspect. Eventually they hit a breaking point.”

“Or we do.” Chimney said in response.

“Yeah, you got that right.” Y/N scoffed, shaking her head and looking at Bobby, “Shouldn’t we set an airbag below the roof or something incase he falls?”

He shook his head, “We don’t want to make him think we’re going to push him off or anything. He might just panic if we start setting it up.”

The girl shrugged, “I mean, it’s just a safety precaution, we could tell him that.”

“I don’t think someone pacing on a roof with a gun is going to be thinking rationally, though.” Eddie told her, nudging her in the shoulder as she nodded in agreement to his statement.

“Ten bucks says he falls right off that roof.” Hen muttered, causing Y/N to laugh as Eddie pulled money from his pocket, “20 says he makes a leap for the tree.”

As Bobby looked over to Eddie in slight disbelief, the male replied, “Come on, the guy’s got at least one more bad life choice left in him.”

Y/N looked to the side and noticed how irritated the homeowner looked, the girl smirking as she pulled a bill out of her pocket, “50 says the homeowner pushes him off.”

“That’s morbid.” Hen chuckled with raised brows, causing Y/N to shrug with a grin. 

Y/N, Eddie, and Chim handed Hen money, the woman taking it and pocketing it as they stood, continuing to watch the situation.

After a few moments, Y/N’s eyes trailed over to where Buck was standing, leaning against the railing as Taylor reported to the camera- the male waiting for her to be done.

She shook her head with a sigh, “I need coffee.”

Bobby looked at her with raised brows, “Want to make a coffee run?”

“Am I okay to do that?” She asked her captain, the male shrugging, “I don’t see why not.”

“What am I going to drive, though?” The girl then questioned, knowing she couldn’t take the fire engine or ambulance in case something happened while she was gone.

Her captain hummed in thought as Hen chimed in, “You could always ask Athena if you could borrow a cop car.”

Y/N laughed, “There’s no way I’m allowed to drive one.”

“Then ask for an escort.” Eddie suggested, causing her to nod, “Okay. I’ll be back.”

The girl walked towards Athena, who just so happened to be near Buck and Taylor- Y/N noticing that Taylor was off air at the moment because her and the male were talking.

“Athena!” Y/N yelled, causing the sergeant to turn towards her, “Do you think it’s possible I could get an escort to a coffee shop?”

“As long as you’re getting coffee, I can get someone to take you.” She replied with a laugh.

Y/N smiled as Athena walked away to grab someone, the girl taking this opportunity to go ask her other friend if he wanted any.

“Buck.” She shouted as she got closer, her voice drawing not only Buck’s attention, but Taylor’s also.

“I’m going on a coffee run, do you want anything?” She asked, causing him to nod, “Coffee sounds amazing right now.”

“Your usual?” 

Buck nodded with a smile and then turned to Taylor, “What do you want?”

Instead of replying directly to him, Taylor turned to Y/N and stated her order, the latter trying to make sure her distaste didn’t show on her face as the former spoke.

Once Taylor was done speaking, Y/N gave them a thumbs up, Buck shouting a quick thank you as she walked away, rolling her eyes once she had turned away from the duo.

Eddie chuckled from a distance, having watched her interaction and her reaction as she walked away, drawing the attention of the group next to him.

“What’s so funny?” Hen asked, causing Eddie to shake his head as he smiled, “Nothing.”

-

Two hours in

-

Y/N returned from the coffee run about an hour and a half ago, having gotten her team their specific orders- along with Athena and Taylor’s- and then having gotten a bunch of other plain ones for the first responders that she hadn’t asked. Even though they weren’t their specific orders, she figured the least she could do was bring them some. She also brought sugar packets and more for them to put additives in their coffees if they wanted to.

Her coffee was gone now, though, along with her teams’, and she sat in the back of the ambulance playing cards with Hen and Chimney as the latter talked about the upcoming birth of his child.

“So Maddie really wants to have this baby at home?” Hen asked him as she placed a card into the pile, Chimney’s turn coming up as he replied, quoting what the mother of his baby had told him, “‘I was a nurse, you’re a paramedic, what could possibly go wrong?’”

The duo with him chuckled as Y/N took her turn, Hen replying to him, “Feels like a 911 dispatcher should know the answer to that question.”

They all laughed at that, Y/N chiming into the conversation, “I think you just need to tell her how you’re feeling. I’m sure she’ll understand your point of view.”

Chimney shrugged, “With all the pregnancy hormones, I’m not so sure.”

Eddie walked over to them, peeking around the edge of the ambulance so that he could see all three of them, “How would you guys feel about pizza?”

“Please!” They all replied in unison.

-

Three hours in

-

“I’m so hungry!” Y/N whined, laying her head on Eddie’s shoulder, the male laughing as he wrapped his arm around her and shook her slightly, “He should be here soon. They mentioned that they had a lot of orders, so it would take a while.”

“It’s been an hour!” She replied as Eddie looked towards the edge of the scene where a pizza man was walking in. He pursed his lips, “I think you might’ve summoned him.”

Then he walked off towards the male, Y/N cheering as her stomach growled, “Finally!”

“Good lord. How much trust are we trying to build here?” Athena asked, causing Eddie to turn to her, “Actually, that’s for us.”

“Why does everybody get to eat but me? Maybe I’m hungry too!” Mr. Nowels, the homeowner, complained, causing Y/N to shrug as she walked closer, “You want a slice?”

Mr. Nowels sighed, having only been trying to make a point, and walked away. Y/N shrugged as Eddie paid the delivery man, the girl grabbing the hot bag and pulling the two boxes out with a grin, “I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited to stuff my face with a slice of pizza.”

Eddie chuckled as she handed the bag back to the delivery driver and waved before he walked off, the duo turning and walking back towards the truck.

“Me either, Y/N. Me either.” Eddie replied.

-

Four hours in

-

Y/N looked to the side and noticed one of the police officers leaning against the fire engine as Buck talked to him, the girl laughing and shaking her head as she walked closer.

“Is he bothering you, sir?” She asked the officer, causing Buck to glance at her with a deadpanned expression.

The officer shook his head, “He’s telling me how his roommate violated ‘bro code’, whatever that is. I don’t think that’s a real thing.”

Y/N looked at Buck with raised brows and a grin as the male sighed and then spoke, trying to defend his point, “How do you know, though? It’s unwritten.”

“How long did you date this woman?” The officer asked him. Y/N crossed her arms with a smirk on her face, watching the interaction as Buck replied, “90 minutes, maybe less. We took dessert to go.”

A watch began beeping, the officer glancing at his wrist, “And I’m done. Good luck.”

Then he walked away, Y/N letting out a low whistle before she began laughing. Buck glared at her, “Shut up!”

Then he took his mask off, throwing it at her, which only made the girl laugh more.

-

Five hours in

-

Eddie quietly began chanting under his breath, leaning against the firetruck as he whispered, “Jump. Jump.”

The rest of the team, except for Buck who wasn’t with them, quickly joined in as they watched the criminal continue to pace on the roof, “Jump. Jump.”

-

Six hours in

-

Y/N sat quietly by herself, Buck with Tayor, Eddie with Athena and Bobby, and then Hen and Chim with each other.

The girl quietly picked at her nails as she waited for something to happen so that they could finally leave this scene.

She heard footsteps, but decided to ignore them, until they came to a stop in front of her. The girl looked up from her hands, looking at the officer who had come up to her.

“What’s a pretty firefighter like you doing all by herself?” He flirted, causing the girl to raise her brows before smiling, “Waiting for this guy to be done pacing on the roof so we can leave.”

“Yeah, I feel you.” He agreed, sitting next to her on the asphalt.

He then looked at her, holding his hand out with a grin, “I’m Anthony, but people always call me Mac because my last name is Macallister.”

“Well, Mac, I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you.” She smiled, shaking his hand.

Mac looked over her shoulder for a second, furrowing his brows before bringing his attention back to her, “That blonde firefighter keeps starring at us.”

“Hm?” Y/N hummed before Mac pointed and she turned, making eye contact with Buck, who quickly looked away and continued his conversation with Taylor.

The girl shrugged, “He’s probably just wondering who you are.”

“Yeah, I think he may be a little jealous.” The officer laughed, giving her a knowing look with a smile. Y/N furrowed her brows, shaking her head, “Nah, he doesn’t think of me in that way.”

“You sure?” Mac questioned with raised brows, causing the girl to nod, which prompted another question, “But you like him, right?”

“Is it really that obvious?” She asked with a sigh, causing him to laugh, “Well, I’ve been watching you a bit today- not to sound creepy or anything- and I’ve noticed the stares you give him when he’s talking to that redhead. I just don’t think you realize that he stares at you also.”

Y/N looked at Mac with a small smile, “Yeah, I-”

The girl got interrupted by a loud crash, a car alarm going off. She quickly stood up, looking over towards the criminal and running over there- noticing Mr. Nowels had just pushed him off the room. Internally, she was cheering, knowing she just won the bet, but externally, she began to do her job.

She ignored Mr. Nowels, who was yelling, and ran over to the criminal, Eddie quickly coming over to assist.

They got to work on safely getting him off the car, putting a neck splint on just in case he had a spinal injury before putting him on a backboard and attending to some of his cuts. Hen and Chimney hopped into the back of the ambulance while Eddie went to the front, the rest of the team getting into the fire engine- the ambulance turning on their sirens. Athena followed in her cop car so that she could make sure he was arrested after he got his medical care.

The fire engine drove to the station while the ambulance and police car went to the hospital. Y/N sat in the back of the engine while Bobby drove and Buck sat in the passenger seat.

The latter turned around and looked at the girl, “So, who was that guy you were flirting with?”

Y/N furrowed her brows, “What guy? I wasn’t flirting with anyone.”

“The cop.” Buck elaborated, the girl shaking her head, “Yeah, we were just talking.”

“It looked like more than that.” Buck argued, “What’s his name?”

“You know what? Why does this matter to you?” She spat out, becoming annoyed with his attitude as they pulled into the firestation.

“Because, I…” He began, trailing off and not allowing his next words to come out.

Y/N scoffed, “Unbelieveable.”

And then she rushed out of the engine, missing the look that Bobby gave the blonde male as she went to her locker.

“Idiot.” The older male mumbled to the younger one, causing him to stare at Bobby in disbelief before they both got out of the vehicle.

Y/N angrily got her casual clothes out of her locker, changing and then slamming the metal door shut as Buck walked in.

“Look, Y/N, I just care about you and want you to be safe.” He said as he walked into the glass area.

“Want me to be safe?” She scoffed, “You’re talking about a cop.”

The blonde rolled his eyes, “That doesn’t mean anything. He could still be a jerk!”

“Well, he’s not the one I think is a jerk.” The girl retorted, glaring at him.

“Ok… I deserve that, but-” He began to say, only for her to interrupt him, “Buck, just stop. Why are you so bent out of shape about this anyways? You were flirting with Taylor the whole day and I didn’t complain to you about it even though it annoyed me! So why do you get to complain to me about someone, who wasn’t even flirting with me, giving me attention?”

“Wait- I wasn’t flirting with Taylor.” Buck stated, causing her to look at him, “What?”

“You said you were annoyed with me flirting with Taylor… I- I wasn’t flirting with her. I was just talking to her about the Albert and Veronica stuff because you and Eddie made it clear you didn’t want me to talk to you about it.” He told her.

The girl sighed, “Yeah, I’m sorry. I might’ve been too harsh about that.”

He shook his head, “No, I deserved it. You guys had to listen to me repeat myself multiple times and… I get what you were saying. I’m going to try and be less awkward with Albert about this.”

She smiled and nodded, “Good.”

“And… I’m sorry for bugging you about the cop guy.” He apologized, gaining a nod from Y/N as she grinned, “I appreciate the apology. I know your heart is in a good place, you just didn’t approach it very well.”

He nodded before they went silent, the male thinking about his next sentence while Y/N gathered her stuff, glancing at the entrance of the fire station and noticing the ambulance was pulling in.

“I gotta go talk to Chim, Eddie, and Hen about something, but I’ll see you tomorrow.” The girl smiled, beginning to walk out, but Buck quickly stopped her, “Wait.”

She turned around, raising her brows as an indicator for him to speak, “Why… why were you annoyed when you thought I was flirting with Taylor?”

Y/N just shook her head with a sigh, looking up and waving, not giving him an answer, “Bye, Buck.”

And then she walked out, the male watching her as she walked towards the ambulance.

The girl figured that he could think about it on his own and hopefully come to the correct conclusion.

The three that Y/N had mentioned earlier hopped out of the ambulance, the girl stopping in front of them and holding out her hands.

The trio looked at her with raised brows, and she quickly spoke to ease their confusion, “I won the bet. Mr. Nowels pushed him off the roof. Money, please!”

Then she made grabbing motion with her hands while the three in front of her laughed, Eddie speaking up, “I can’t believe you were right about that.”

Then the money was slammed into her palm from them, the girl grinning, “Thank you all and have a good night!”

She mock-saluted them before turning and walking out of the fire station.

-

The next day, Y/N walked into the fire station with a smile, ready for her shift for the day. 

The girl went to her locker, changing out of her casual clothes and into her fire station shirt along with her turnout pants, putting her gear suspenders over her shoulders.

“Hey, Y/N.” She heard a voice greet, the girl turning and sending a smile Buck’s way as he went to his locker, “Hey.”

“So, I’ve been thinking.” He stated, causing the girl to jokingly reply, “Oh no.”

He looked up at her with a small, joking, glare before continuing his sentence, “I think I figured out why you were annoyed.”

Y/N crossed her arms, leaning against the lockers, “Well, let’s hear it.”

“It’s because you were jealous.” He smirked, pointing at her before opening his locker and getting his stuff out.

The girl stood, waiting for him to continue. She pursed her lips as he said nothing else and she shrugged, “That’s it?”

He shook his head, “No. You were jealous because you… like me.” 

“Yeah. Apparently I’ve been pretty obvious about it, so I’m a bit surprised you just figured this out.” She said as Eddie walked in, “Actually, he didn’t. I told him.”

The girl looked at him with a dropped jaw, “What?”

And then she glanced back at Buck, who was sending a glare Eddie’s way before he quickly directed his attention back to the girl, “Anyways, with that said, are you doing anything later tonight?”

Y/N tilted her head, raising her brows, “No… why?”

“How about you come to my apartment? I can cook us dinner and we can watch a movie?” He suggested.

The girl grinned, “Is the Evan Buckley asking me out on a date?”

“Maybe. Depends on if you say yes or not.” He said with a small smile. The girl laughed and nodded, “Yes, that sounds great.”

“Finally.” Eddie muttered from behind them, having already changed into his clothes for the work day.

The duo that was just talking both rolled their eyes and turned to their friend, speaking in unison, “Shut up, Eddie.”

Eddie was about to speak before the siren went off, causing them to sigh, Hen peeking her head into the room, “Come on, slowpokes. Let’s go.”

The call rang out through the firestation, informing the group that they were on their way to a house to look for someone inside the walls. 

This meant they needed both the ambulance and the fire engine, so Hen and Chimney took the former while the rest of them piled into the latter.

Eddie and Bobby were in the front while Buck and Y/N were in the back, ready to head to the scene. Eddie turned around and faced his friends as Bobby drove, “So… what movie are you two planning on watching later?”

Y/N rolled her eyes as he wiggled his brows at them, Bobby furrowing his brows in confusion at the interaction while Buck replied, “I’m not sure yet.”

Then he turned to Y/N, “What movies do you like?”

The girl shrugged with pursed lips, “Pretty much anything. I’m a huge horror and comedy fan, though.”

He nodded with a grin while Bobby looked in the rearview mirror, “What’s this for?”

Before the two in the back could reply, Eddie did for them, “Oh, Buck finally asked Y/N out on a date. They’re gonna hang in his apartment and watch a movie.”

Bobby’s brows raised in slight surprise at the information before grinning, “Finally.”

The duos’ jaws dropped, the two replying in unison, “Really?”

Eddie just laughed while Bobby spoke, “Yeah, It’s about time. I can see the way you two look at each other. It was pretty obvious.”

“Okay, no, I might’ve been obvious, but this guy was not!” Y/N argued, pointing at Buck who just shrugged in response.

“Yes, he was. I just think you’re both oblivious.” Bobby said as they pulled into the driveway of the house they were going to enter.

“Hey!” The two shouted at their captain, taking offense to his words. Bobby quickly hopped out of the fire engine, wanting to avoid more words from the duo as they both glanced at each other with shocked looks on their faces, Eddie chuckling as he got out of the passenger door.

Buck stood up and went out, holding a hand for the girl behind him. Y/N gratefully took his hand, hopping down from the engine in her turnouts. 

The group all put their masks on as Bobby shouted, “Buck, grab the saw, the rest of you, head inside.” 

The members of the 118 obeyed their captain, except for Buck who was doing as he was told, quickly following behind him as he grabbed a heat signature camera.

They made their way inside and Athena heard them, shouting to alert them of the room she was in. They team walked into the room, noticing the wife was sat in a chair, hands cuffed behind her back with an officer standing behind her as Buck jogged into the room with the large tool in his hand.

“Kinky.” Y/N muttered jokingly, the group looking at her with deadpanned expressions at her words while the wife scoffed.

“What?” The girl asked, Bobby rolling his eyes before turning to his wife and pulling out the heat signature camera, turning it on and scanning the walls by the window.

He looked through the lens, noticing a figure on the screen that was moving, “I’ve got movement.”

“What?” The wife behind them questioned, causing the group to turn towards her, “He’s still alive?”

Once she noticed their expressions, she was quick to change up her words, “I mean… great!”

“Why don’t you start by telling me how exactly your husband got behind that wall?” Athena asked with raised brows.

“Ex-husband. Or at least, soon to be. He filed right before the pandemic-” The wife began to explain, talking about how the courts closed and they were trapped in a house together during COVID. 

Buck raised his brows, leaning in towards Y/N, “If this date doesn’t go the way you expect, do you promise to not put me inside the walls?”

The girl shrugged with a smirk, “No promises.”

Buck turned to Hen, “You heard that right? You’re my witness if something happens to me.”

The woman turned away from him, pursing her lips and feigning confusion, “What did I hear? I didn’t hear anything.”

Y/N grinned, holding up a fist for Hen to fist bump, which she did. Buck’s jaw dropped in disbelief, “Wow.”

After the woman finished explaining her story, Chimney and Hen ran to get their medical supplies while Eddie went and grabbed the needed items to get behind the brick wall.

Once they returned, Eddie handed Buck the chisel and a hammer, giving one to Bobby as well. The duo quickly began hammering away at the bricks in their weak spots, waiting for when they were loose to pull them away. Slowly, a hole began to form in the wall, Bobby yanking the bricks from their position and dropping them onto the ground behind him, “I think I can see him!”

Once the hole was big enough, Y/N knelt down and reached her hand towards the male, “Can you give me your hand, sir?”

She grabbed his wrist as he reached towards her, the girl gently beginning to pull him out, Buck coming to assist her. “You got him, Buck?” She asked as he reached and grabbed the male’s other hand.

“Yeah, we’re good.” He replied, the girl nodding, “Okay, ready, set-” 

“Go.” She then said, both of them tugging him through the hole and onto the backboard.

Y/N was quick to put on medical gloves while Eddie began checking for a pulse and if the male was breathing or not with his stethoscope, “He’s breathing, but barely. Only one side of his chest is rising.”

Y/N reached under the male before pulling her gloved hand back, showing the blood on it, “Stab wound.”

Eddie nodded, “He probably has a punctured lung.”

“Looks like he lost a ton of blood, not to mention extreme dehydration.” Hen said, getting the bag from her medkit, “I’m gonna run two lines wide open.”

“Alright, let’s get him stabilized and prepped for transport.” Bobby ordered, watching over the group as they did what was necessary.

Once they were done, Chimney and Eddie lifted the backboard and began to walk out of the house, Y/N noticing that the other officer that was there had taken the wife away.

The rest of the group began gathering their other tools before returning to the fire engine and putting everything away, the ambulance heading to the hospital while the engine went back to the station.

-

Once the shift was over, Y/N headed to her locker, doing her quick routine of getting back into her casual clothes so that she could leave.

Buck walked in and smiled at her, the girl giving him a grin back as she put her work necessities in her locker, “So… what time should I get to your place?”

“How does 7 sound?” He asked her, opening his locker and taking his shirt off so that he could change.

The girl’s eyes trailed down before she heard Buck laugh, Y/N quickly bringing her gaze up and noticing that he had caught her. She cleared her throat, “7 sounds great.”

“Great.” He grinned, finishing what he needed to do. He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek before sending a wink her way and walking out the door, “See you then!”

Y/N’s cheeks turned red as Hen walked into the locker room and spotted the girl standing there, looking dazed. “Someone’s blushing.” The woman stated with a cheeky smirk.

Y/N threw her dirty shirt at Hen in response, causing the woman to laugh and throw it back at her before the former walked out of the locker room with her keys in hand, going to her apartment to prepare for her date.

-

Y/N took the elevator up to Buck’s floor, the girl wearing a dark blue dress that reached her mid-thigh, a black sweater wrapped around her shoulders. She slung her small purse over her shoulder as the elevator reached his floor, Y/N quickly stepping out in her black heels and walking to his door.

Once she reached his apartment, she lifted her hand, knocking on the dark wood and waiting for Buck to answer the door.

Instead of Buck, though, his roommate answered, Y/N smiling at him, “Hey, Albert, what’s up?”

“Nothing much. Buck didn’t mention that you were the one he was dating.” Albert commented, “He’s in the bathroom right now.”

The girl nodded, walking into the door as he stepped to the side, “It’s been a while since i’ve seen you. It’s nice to see…”

She trailed off as her eyes met with the girl in the kitchen, her brows furrowing in confusion.

Buck stepped into the room as Albert introduced the woman, noticing Y/N’s confusion, “Oh, that’s Veronica.”

“Well it’s nice to see you and Veronica, Albert.” Y/N muttered with a clenched jaw, making eye contact with Buck as he gave her a sheepish glance.

“Dinner’s not ready yet, but it should be soon.” Buck told his date, trying to act normal as the girl made eye contact with Albert’s girlfriend once more.

“Would you like a glass of wine?” Veronica asked with a smile, Y/N quickly nodding, “Yes, please. I could desperately use a glass right about now.”

Then the girl placed her bag on the table as Buck came over, placing a hand on the small of her back, “Uh.. shall we?”

He gestured over to the couch, Y/N moving so that his hand slipped off of her as she made her way to the piece of furniture.

“You lied to me.” She muttered as he followed, the male shaking his head, “Technically… I didn’t. I-”

She stopped walking, turning and facing him with an angry glare, her eyes growing watery but she wouldn’t dare to let her tears fall- at least not right now, “That’s not the point, Evan. You failed to mention that this was going to be a double date with ‘bad date girl’ and your roommate. I kind of count that as lying.”

The girl then continued making her way to the couch, muttering under her breath as she took a seat, “I wouldn’t have said yes if I knew you were just going to be using me.”

Buck looked at her like a deer in headlights, opening his mouth to speak but not getting the chance to spit a word out as Veronica and Albert walked back over, the former speaking as she handed Y/N her wine glass, “Dinner is going to take a few more minutes, but I figured we could do appetizers while we wait.”

She then sat down, Y/N quickly taking a sip out of her glass as Veronica spoke up once more, “How long have you two been dating?”

“I was wondering that too, Buck. How come you never said anything? Y/N’s awesome!” Albert chimed in, Y/N immediately giving him a response before Buck could speak, “Oh, that’s because we aren’t dating. He just wanted me here so he wouldn’t be a third wheel. We’re just friends.” 

She then looked at the male next to her, “Right?”

Evan avoided her question, looking at Veronica as he began to talk, “We actually work together. She’s been my partner-in-crime for as long as I can remember.”

“I’d gladly let Eddie take that spot now.” The girl murmured quietly before looking up and smiling at the duo in front of her, “And I know how you two met. Buck has told me about it. Quite a few times, actually.”

The male beside her shook his head, “I- I wouldn’t say that-”

Veronica just looked at them with raised brows as Albert chimed in, gesturing to his girlfriend and his roommate, “I’m actually surprised you two didn’t get along.”

Y/N took a long gulp from her glass before nodding, and nudging Buck with her shoulder, “Yeah. This guy sometimes doesn’t know how to act around women. His ego deflates when someone doesn’t immediately like him.”

“Yeah, I don’t stroke anyones’ egos. That’s not my thing.” Veronica replied with a small shrug, causing Y/N to nod, “Good for you. I think I’m going to try that also.”

She then set the glass down, pulling her phone out from her sweater pocket as her tears were about to spill over. Y/N cleared her throat, standing up as she lied, “Sorry, my coworker, Eddie, just texted me. It’s an emergency and he needs someone to watch his son last minute. I gotta go.”

The girl then pocketed her phone once more, smiling at the pair in front of her, “It was nice seeing you again, Albert- and it was nice meeting you, Veronica.”

“You too.” She heard them say from behind her as she rushed to grab her purse, opening the apartment door and wiping her eyes as she began to walk towards the elevator.

“Y/N- Y/N, wait!” Buck yelled from behind her, the girl listening as his footsteps sped down the hallway, “I know Eddie didn’t actually text you, okay? It’s not what you think!”

She turned, looking up at the ceiling to prevent the water from spilling from her eyes and once she felt that it wouldn’t, she looked back down at him, “What? That you never actually wanted to go on a date with me and that you were just using my feelings for you to get them to see you with someone? Fuck you.”

Then the girl turned back around, Buck quickly grabbing onto her wrist and turning her back towards him, “No- it’s not like that-”

Y/N yanked her wrist from his grasp, “Don’t- Don’t touch me. You… God, I mean, you decided to hurt me just because you can’t stand the idea of someone not liking you? Are you serious?”

“No, that’s- I mean…” He shrugged with a false smile, “Come on, I’m very likeable.”

The girl stood there in silence, swallowing the lump in her throat as a tear finally made it’s way down her face. Buck sighed, glancing off to the side before making eye contact with her, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, okay? Look, Albert invited me over and I knew it was gonna be super awkward, and I didn’t want to sit through that alone. So I asked a friend.”

Y/N gave him a watery smile, “Right. A friend. ‘Cause that’s all I am to you.”

She sniffled as Buck’s heart dropped, the girl wiping her tears before speaking once more, “You could’ve just told me the situation and then asked me as a friend. You didn’t have to lie about having feelings for me.”

A scoff left her lips, the girl continuing, “I mean… If this is how you decide to treat your ‘friends’, maybe the problem isn’t Albert.”

Her eyes met his, “Maybe it’s you.”

Then she turned, walking away from him, hoping he’d say something as she left…

But he said nothing.

So she continued on her way, getting into the elevator and letting the doors close before her tears began to run down her face at a faster pace.

Y/N pulled out her phone as the elevator doors opened to the lobby, the girl pulling up Eddie’s contact, about to hit the call button- but her phone rang before she could.

She raised her brows as she noticed it was the man she was about to call, Y/N hitting answer and bringing the phone to her ear, “Hey, I was just about to-”

He cut her off as he began speaking in a panicked tone, “I need your help, Chris is missing and-”

Her jaw dropped at the words, the girl turning and making her way towards the building exit, but she quickly stopped in her tracks as Chris walked through the lobby doors.

Eddie was still rambling on the other side of the line, Y/N cutting him off so that she could let him know his son was safe, “Eddie, he’s here.”

“At Buck’s place?” He asked on the other side of the line, Y/N nodding even though he couldn’t see her as she replied, “Yeah. He’s here.”

“Okay, I’ll be there to get him soon.”

And then he hung up, Y/N wiping her face before she walked towards the kid who was making his way towards the elevators, “Chris, what are you doing here?”

“I had a fight with my dad. I came here to see Buck.” He informed her, the girl nodding and hitting the up button to the elevator, “Okay, I’ll take you up to him. You can’t run off like this though, your dad is worried sick.”

“Did you talk to him?” The kid asked her, glancing up as they entered the elevator. She nodded, “Yeah, he called me just as you walked in. He’s coming to get you. Do you want to tell me what happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He sighed, the adult next to him humming in acknowledgement as they reached Buck’s floor, the duo leaving the elevator and walking to his apartment.

Chris knocked on the door, the girl next to him beginning to walk away, but the kid turned to her, “Wait, where are you going?”

She sighed, “Buck and I aren’t really on good terms right now, buddy. I just wanted to make sure you got here safe.”

Buck opened the door as Chris replied, “I want you to stay.”

“Want who to st-” The older male began to ask before he peeked out of the door and noticed who he was talking about, “-oh.”

“Fine.” The woman muttered, walking into the apartment behind Chris, noticing that Albert and Veronica were now gone and it was just them three in the living space.

“Does your dad know you’re here, Chris?” The male asked the child, who was quick to respond, “Yes, he called Y/N.”

Buck then looked at the girl for confirmation, her nodding in response, “He called me as I was leaving to ask for help finding Chris, but he was walking into the building. Eddie is on his way to pick him up.”

He pursed his lips and then looked at Chris as the said kid sat on the couch, “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

Chris shook his head as Buck sat on the table, Y/N leaning against the wall near the TV, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Well, you’re here, so we gotta talk about something.” He said to the child, using a gentle tone with him. Once Chris didn’t reply, Buck sighed, speaking once more, “Come on, look, you were there for me when I needed to talk, so now I want to be here for you. It’s what friends do.”

Y/N scoffed under her breath at that, the action not going unnoticed by Buck as Chris replied, “Dad’s dating.”

The girl gave him a sympathetic look as Buck continued to interact with the boy, “Yeah, that’s gotta be weird for you, huh? Maybe it feels like he’s forgetting your mom, but, Chris, I promise you-”

Chris sighed, interrupting the male, “I wish I could forget.”

Y/N pushed off the wall at that and moved closer, sitting on the table next to Buck and talking to Chris, “What do you mean by that, bud?”

“People go away. Not just mom.” He stated sadly, “Abuelita, Carla, my friends… they leave, and then I miss them. I don’t want to miss anyone else.”

The adults in front of him nodded in acknowledgement, sad looks on their faces as Buck spoke again, “Yeah, um… people- people go away… and i-it’s sad, and it hurts. But, you know, not everyone goes away for forever. Sometimes they come back, and as much as we miss them, that’s how happy we are seeing them again. Your grandma, your friends, Carla… you’re gonna see them all again.”

“Do you promise?” Chris asked.

“I do. And until that happens, you still got us.” Buck replied, gesturing to him and the girl next to him, Y/N sending a small smile Chris’ way and nodding in agreement as she spoke, “We aren’t going anywhere.”

Chris got up, opening his arms and pulling the two adults into a hug. One of Buck’s arms wrapped around Chris while the other wound around Y/N, the young boy’s head in between both of theirs.

“You guys are good friends.” The kid said to them, his arms hanging around their shoulders.

Buck glanced at Y/N over Chris’ back and spoke, “Yeah… sometimes.”

He then patted his back and pulled away, Y/N giving Chris one last final squeeze before doing the same, a knock coming on the door soon after.

All of them stood up, Buck going to the door and opening it, Eddie quickly rushing in.

Once his eyes locked on Chris, he moved forwards, encasing his son in a hug and muttering to him, “Don’t run away like that again, okay? You can’t scare me like that.”

Chris nodded into his shoulder, “I’m sorry, dad.”

“It’s okay, bud.” He replied, pulling away from the hug and standing up, “Let’s go home, okay?”

The kid nodded and Y/N smiled at the duo before looking at the younger boy, “Tell him what you told us. He’ll understand.”

Chris nodded once more, grabbing his crutches and making his way towards the door while Eddie looked at his friends, “Thank you guys.”

And then they went to walk out, Eddie turning around and speaking once again, “You’ll have to let me know how the date went later, okay?”

Y/N pursed her lips while Buck sent a smile his way, the door closing behind the father-son duo.

“Well, I’m gonna go also.” The girl then said, pulling her sweater closer to her frame in an attempt to close herself off as she began to walk towards the door.

“Or… you could stay? And we can try this again?” The male spoke, stepping in front of her in an attempt to stop her from leaving.

She sighed, “Look, you don’t have to pretend to have feelings for me just because you-”

He was quick to cut her off, “It’s not pretend. I’m sorry for making it seem like it was, and I’m sorry for earlier. I do have feelings for you and I should’ve asked you out on a first date a long time ago. I know I messed up tonight, but let me try to make it right, okay? With just us two. If you still hate me later, you never have to talk to me again. I’ll transfer firehouses and be out of your sight for forever.”

Y/N huffed, setting her purse down on the table, “Fine, and even if I hate you by the end of this, which is impossible because I could never hate you- even after what happened earlier, I’d never make you do that. I know how much the 118 means to you.”

He just smiled at her and nodded, one of his hands grabbing her own, “So? What do you want to eat?”

He dragged her to the kitchen, opening the pantry and showing her the stuff he had and giving her an idea of what could be made.

She pursed her lips, “How about we just have some takeout delivered? And watch a movie like we were talking about earlier today?”

Buck squeezed her hand, “Sounds perfect.”

Then he kissed her cheek before making a call to her favorite takeout place while she picked the movie they would watch.

She didn’t notice, but Buck watched as she sat on his couch, making herself at home while she picked the movie.

And he couldn’t help but think how nice this sight would be to see everyday.

[feeder86]

The 1%

It had been such a thrill, finding that the scouts had picked him; those same experts who had signed up the likes of Harley Hawkinson and Carl Williams. Did they really see the same potential in Nicko as they had done in those superstar football players? It all felt so surreal as he got off the plane to Oklahoma and entered the training facility. 

Nicko knew it wouldn’t be easy to prove himself. He looked around the large sports hall, filled with over one hundred large, athletic college guys, all hoping for the same dream of a professional sports contract: to play the game that they loved and get paid handsomely for it.

“As you all know, the modern game of football is dominated by guys who are more muscular than we have ever seen before,” an older guy explained to them from the staging area during this first welcome meeting. “In the last three years, we have seen the average weight of a professional football player increase by 30lbs. And that number looks set to continue to increase.”

Looking around at the other guys, Nicko couldn’t help but understand why he was saying this. Sure, the guys around him were full of talent. How else would they have got here otherwise? But put them on a field with the professionals out there these days, and they would get trampled down in seconds. They all knew it. None of them had the muscle and the bulk that was needed to survive in a big league game.

“Our training scheme and medical support can give you that last hope of achieving your dreams,” the man on stage went on; selling the scheme which each of them had already signed up for. They all knew this was their only real shot at success. These days, no professional football player got anywhere without the experimental drugs offered in places like this; not that anyone would ever admit it outside of these walls. “So, my advice to you is, train hard and work with us… Now I’m going to hand you over to someone you will all be very familiar with. We’re so proud of him and delighted that he has given up his time to be with us today. Boys, please may I introduce you to… the one and only… Carl Williams!” he beamed, as the large room of excited college athletes roared into life.

An enormous, hulking mass of man began strutting from the door and onto the stage. He lifted his arm up, accepting all the applause and smiling from ear to ear. Every muscle on his body was pumped and full. Even his forearms looked incredibly developed. Nicko could hardly believe his eyes! His biggest celebrity crush, right here in the same room with him! Carl was known for playing rough and dirty on the field and, in Nicko’s wildest fantasies, he was much the same in the bedroom. Not to mention the fact that, in terms of celebrity bulges, Carl was off the charts. Every gay site he visited had picked up on the fact Carl was packing something absolutely enormous between those giant thighs. 

The man didn’t speak to them for long, but soon had everyone up on their feet, chanting his name. He stuck around too, and was there that evening as they sat down to their first meal together.

“They say he has some sort of sixth sense about which guys will go on to do well here,” Nicko’s new friend, Steve, whispered to him; both of them looking with jealousy at the six young guys who had been invited to sit on Carl’s table.

Nicko shook his head sceptically. “Nah, they’re just the loud ones who know how to sell themselves,” he scoffed, having met a couple of them and deciding that they were not the type of guys he would want to hang around with here; so pumped full of arrogance and self-importance. “We’ve just got to train hard, that’s all.”

Steve exhaled and raised his eyebrows. “I wish that was true,” he mumbled. “But we both know the only thing that sets this training academy apart from the rest is the drugs they use. You can train as hard as you like, but if the drugs disagree with you, that’s the end of the line. Career over.”

Nicko rubbed the spot where he’d had his first injection earlier that day; straight into the muscle at the top of his right butt cheek. ‘Please work!’ he thought silently. There was nothing more he wanted in life than to be up on that top table with Carl Williams.

During the first three weeks, some guys started to stand out remarkably well. Shoulders began to widen, whilst larger glutes and thighs made the training sessions more intense and physical than ever before. Nicko could see the changes in his roommate, Steve, each time he came out of the shower: his biceps bulging and his pecs pumped.

As for Nicko, he had seen only minor changes in his muscle mass, and he was yet to make any impression on the trainers. But as certain guys began to bulk faster, hit harder and dominate on the field, it became more and more of a challenge to stand out, or even stay on your feet.

Egos were beginning to run riot at the camp. Those guys who had quickly responded to the treatments began to strut about with more confidence and ownership of the place than any of them had expected. The larger guys hung out with each other more, sitting together at meal times and excluding those they obviously found inferior.

“Don’t worry,” Steve whispered to him as it was obvious that everything was getting to Nicko. “You’ll respond more to the drugs soon. You’ve just got to focus on the training. That’s the important part.”

Nicko nodded, knowing that Steve didn’t believe a word of what he was saying. In two weeks, they were making their first eliminations, and Steve knew he was heading straight home.

During the assessment, Steve very quickly got a sense of how badly it was going. He was weighed, prodded and poked to within an inch of his life; seeing the same grim faces on the medical professionals all around him. In the end, he was simply sent to a small room and told to wait there for someone to come and speak to him. The afternoon training session was to begin in thirty minutes, but no-one was in a rush to ensure he would make it. The reason for that was obvious: he wasn’t coming back. 

It was no shock to Nicko that he was in this position. The last week in particular had been especially hard. He’d been thrown around by the larger guys in training, beginning to understand how the nerds must have felt back in high school. At twenty-one years old, Nicko was in a place that was little better than a kindergarten playground.

Without warning, and making Nicko jump with surprise, the door suddenly opened and an enormous muscular man entered. It took a couple of seconds for Nicko to focus and recognise the person who was now filling the tiny room they were in, but when he did, he shot to his feet and held his arm out, desperate to shake the guy’s hand. “Carl Williams!” he blasted. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

Carl looked across at him with a smirk; his eyes travelling up and down Nicko’s body as he reached out his hand for him to shake. “So you’re Nicko, huh?” he asked, as if trying to hold back a laugh.

Nicko nodded, hardly believing that this meeting was even happening. Carl was even more insanely huge and attractive up close like this.

“Sit down, Nicko,” Carl ordered, grabbing a chair himself. “I need to break something to you.”

“I’m being kicked out, aren’t I?” Nicko shot back, not wanting to draw this out and ruin his one-on-one time with his biggest celebrity crush.

“Oh, of course you are,” Carl chuckled, seeming surprised that Nicko had only just figured it out. “But one of the boys told me you had a bit of a crush on me, so I thought I would come in here to soften the blow.”

Carl gazed at Nicko with a sly grin on his face. He knew that he had embarrassed him and he was enjoying the period of time when Nicko was squirming and desperately thinking of how to respond.

“Um, so… how come I’m going home?” he asked, trying to fill the cringing silence.

“Because you’ve not responded to the drugs the same as everyone else,” Carl shot back, looking at him as though he was stupid for not being able to see that for himself. 

“But there are a few guys who aren’t packing on muscle all that fast either,” Nicko protested.

“Oh, you’re right about that,” Carl nodded. “But you’ve not gained any muscle mass at all,” he stated harshly. “In fact, you’re part of the less than 1% who actually lose muscle mass on this treatment.”

“That’s not true,” Nicko protested. “I have gained weight since I’ve been here.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Carl laughed. “You’ve only gained fat since you started.” He pointed at the slight paunch that always popped out whenever Nicko was on a bulking diet. “All the guys can see that. I hear they’ve been giving you a rough time this week? The medical team spotted a nice collection of bruises on your body this morning.”

“Not too bad,” Nicko lied, not wanting to look pathetic in front of his idol.

Carl simply laughed as if he knew differently. “Sure, sure,” he nodded patronisingly. “Those guys are just learning; being on a football team is like being part of a pack of wolves. So when you see a little piggy on the field with you, you’ve got to go for them.”

Nicko’s eyes bulged at Carl’s rudeness. But the professional athlete simply smiled at him, as if daring him to call him out on his comments. Then, when Nicko kept quiet, the big man nodded in approval.

“I like you,” Carl grinned wickedly. “You’ve got the right attitude and you don’t live too far from where I play, do you?” he asked, having clearly studied Nicko’s notes before coming in. “I’d love to grab a few beers with you sometime in the coming months.”

Nicko nodded his head frantically.

“Good,” Carl smiled, reaching his large hand out to stroke Nicko’s thigh. “Play your cards right and I might even let you suck me off,” he teased, before standing and heading straight out of the room.

Despite the daring, unbelievably hot fantasy Carl had dangled in front of Nicko’s nose: home still beckoned. He had lost. The dream of sporting success and insane riches was now over.

With a mediocre college degree, Nicko settled into an equally mediocre office job, close to home so that he could move back in with his parents. He’d suffered from a great sense of failure after the training scheme had gone so badly. No one wanted to be the first one sent home; he hadn’t even had a chance to say even a quick goodbye to his friends. He’d got himself into quite the slump, finding that no matter what he did, he simply couldn’t shake off the little arching paunch he had developed in Oklahoma. In fact, despite all his careful eating and gym work, it actually seemed to be increasing in size more than anything. 

The same could be said for the rest of his body, with Nicko’s underwear pinching uncomfortably as his tight glutes began to pack on some extra, softening mass. Was he really developing love handles at this age, even after all this exercise? It just didn’t seem physically possible. His date, the weekend before, had even called him out on his extra pounds. Perhaps he had even been right to do so; his profile pictures really were a little out of date these days. It meant that when he got the call from someone on Carl Williams’ staff, trying to set up a date for their beers, Nicko went immediately into panic mode. There was nothing in his closet that was suitable for drinks with a football superstar; at least, nothing that fitted!

“Well, well, well…” Carl smirked as Nicko entered the very private VIP room at the back of the noisy, exclusive club in the city. The enormous 335lb football player looked sexier than ever, all dressed up as he was for a night out. “Let me get a look at you,” he demanded, ruthlessly kicking away the table in front of him with his feet and making space for Nicko.

Having travelled for an hour to get here and arguing with the security outside for twenty minutes that he was a guest of Carl’s, Nicko wanted nothing more than to just sit and have a drink. However, when Carl clicked his fingers and pointed again to where he was being summoned, Nicko only did as he was told.

Immediately, Carl reached forwards, slapping one hand on Nicko’s larger butt and the other on the furthest extent that his paunch was now sticking out. He smiled, bouncing both lightly and seeming to appreciate the new width across the middle of Nicko’s body. “Look at you!” he growled with disgust. “You wouldn't last two minutes on the football field now. My boys would rip you to pieces!”

“I’m trying this new diet…” Nicko began explaining, not knowing what else to say.

Carl winced and shook his head impatiently. “Shh! I don’t want to hear about shit like that.” He leaned right back, then tapped his outstretched thigh, silently telling Nicko to sit on it.

Again, Nicko did as he was old, unable to comprehend that he was getting so close to his football idol. He heard Carl growl in appreciation as Nicko’s torso slipped so easily into his reach. Then, without a word, he began unbuttoning Nicko’s shirt from the very top.

“Wait!” Nicko jumped. “Don’t people come in here?”

“Yes,” Carl replied, unperturbed as he reached the fourth button down.

“What if someone comes in and sees me like this?”

“Then they will see…” Carl smiled, finally reaching the end of the buttons and now splaying the shirt material to the sides, “...THIS!”

Nicko tensed as his fleshy torso was revealed to the one person he had been carefully dressing to conceal it from.

“Fuck!” Carl blasted. “Even the tits are coming in!” he laughed loudly, reaching up and bouncing one of Nicko’s nipples.

Nicko got up, feeling embarrassed. He felt Carl’s strong hand clasp the back of his pants and pull him back over his knee so that Nicko actually fell into the space on the couch beside the football superstar. From there, the enormous man seemed to envelope him, his arm over his body and his face so deliciously close.

“Don’t be shy,” Carl whispered teasingly. “This happens to all the boys at the training camp eventually. Well…” he grinned, raising his arm to show off his incredible bicep, “...almost all.”

“Weight gain?” Nicko asked, feeling his stomach rolling over his belt as he sat, half on his back, with the enormous athlete looming over him.

Carl nodded. “A fat belly, jiggly tits, a giant, doughy butt… you know how it goes,” he laughed; his lips devastatingly near. “But the one percent, well, that boy is always very special.”

Niko nodded, remembering Carl referring to the muscle stimulant medication having an opposite outcome for one percent of the people who used it. Which, in Nicko’s group, had been him. “I’m special?” he asked, aroused by all this attention he was getting.

“Very much so,” Carl grinned, rubbing Nicko’s cheek with an outstretched finger. “The one percent packs on fat faster than anyone else. In less than a year, he can go from a chiselled athlete to a full grown superchub!”

“That can’t be true,” Nicko replied. “They’d never allow something like that.”

“And yet…” Carl laughed, grabbing the roll of fat hanging over Nicko’s belt: his point made. “You really have no concept of how much money there is to be made in football, do you? How vital things like this are for the economy? Fatties like you are just… collateral damage… a necessary evil on the way to creating superstars like me.”

“How do I stop this?” Niko asked, watching the athlete getting up and unbuckling his pants.

“Sucking on this should help,” Carl lied, pulling his monstrously large erection out and slapping it into the palm of his hand. It was even bigger than Nicko had ever imagined, gazing at pictures and videos of the guy’s bulge over the years

Overcome with lust, Nicko slipped his mouth over as much of it as he could, just as he was directed. Everything that had happened since entering this room had been like a dream. Whatever weird things were happening in his life right now, here he was, pleasuring a football champion!

“Oh, yeah! That’s good!” Carl moaned. “Yes! Work that tongue, One Percent! Take as much of me in as you can!”

In those moments, Nicko did not care what was happening to him. He was the luckiest guy in the world, feeling ecstatic as he brought the enormous man to a full climax, simply by using his mouth.

Clearly impressed, a sweaty Carl buckled his belt back up and sat himself down again. “Keep that up and you’ll go far with me,” he sighed in appreciation.

As Carl fixed his clothing, Nicko tried to do the same, beginning to refasten his shirt buttons. However, Carl was still having none of it; placing his large hand very decidedly over Nicko’s and saying ‘no’ in a very strict manner; as if training a puppy.

“Have you ever thought about moving to the city?” Carl asked next.

Nicko shook his head. “I couldn’t afford it. Plus, I don’t know anyone here.”

“Good. That means you wouldn’t go wandering,” Carl shot back bluntly. “I can get you somewhere by next weekend. You can live there, and then you’re close by for me to pop in whenever I want. I keep a few guys that way.”

“Why would you do that for me?” Nicko asked, confused by what he felt were a rush of mixed messages.

“At a game, the front row seats are always the best,” Carl simply replied, leaning across once more and flicking the fat roll that fell over Nicko’s belt. “And this is a show I have no intention of missing…”

It was a couple of months later. Nicko stood at the large picture window of his apartment, still unable to comprehend the amazing view he had over the cityscape. Fully furnished and decorated by professional interior designers, Nicko was living a life he could have only ever imagined in his very wildest of dreams. He was even paid a salary each month and had new bank accounts set up entirely by Carl’s people. And all it took was the signing of several non-disclosure agreements from the athlete’s numerous lawyers.

“It’s time to put that pizza down, Fat Boy!” Carl called out, striding in unannounced, as usual.

Nicko chuckled. He hadn’t been eating any pizza, although you would never have guessed that from looking at him. Upon Carl’s insistence, he wore only his underwear around the apartment, catching glimpses of his increasingly lardy reflection in the many, many mirrors that Carl had insisted was part of the interior design.

“Jeez! Look at you!” Carl laughed, undressing himself at the door, as he always did, and watching as his secret project came waddling into view. He pulled his erection out and stipped even his boxers, standing there as the perfect masculine specimen. “Your tits just won’t quit growing, will they?” he laughed. “And look at this fat butt!” he marvelled, dropping Nicko’s underwear and slapping the oversized glutes which had been filling up at a faster rate since Carl had been sending over take-out most nights. Nicko could tell from the way that Carl was handling them, exactly how the big man wanted to fuck him that evening.

The big mirror in the hallway was always Carl’s favourite spot. He could bend Nicko over the sturdy little desk and watch their reflections as he powerfully bombarded his boy’s chubby’s rear with blow after blow.

“You played well last night,” Nicko offered afterwards as a naked Carl lounged on his sofa for a rest afterwards..

“Yeah, yeah,” Carl sighed, rolling his eyes. He had people blowing smoke up his ass all day long. This wasn’t what he kept Nicko for.

“I felt so proud, I decided to finish all those doughnuts you sent me,” he explained, hoping to please his lover.

“Good,” Carl nodded. “It’s about time you stopped resisting the ways I’m trying to help you fatten faster.” He beckoned Nicko closer, just as the chubby boy had hoped. “So, tell me, how did it make you feel, eating all that for me?”

Still fully loaded and, as yet, unsatisfied, Nicko gasped in excitement as he felt Carl’s hand moving onto his thigh, ready to pleasure him if only he said the right things. “It felt incredible,” he replied, exaggerating. “It made me want to eat even more food and please you so much more,” he continued, feeling his erection having a gentle stroke; so subtle and yet so precise.

“Go on,” Carl demanded, not letting Nicko stop. “Tell me more.”

Nicko gasped, always climaxing pathetically quickly whenever Carl was the one touching him. “It made me so excited to get heavier for you…” he offered.

“Oh, no. That’s not the right word now, is it?” Carl sighed with disappointment. “You’re not just getting heavier, are you? Tell me what’s really happening, One Percent.”

Nicko gave another gasp of arousal, his jaw slackening as the pleasure built. “I’m getting fatter for you,” he replied diligently.

“What else?” Carl demanded again, having found a small crack in Nicko’s defences and prizing it open in any way that he could.

“I’m getting lazier. I don’t exercise. And I eat like a pig,” Nicko whispered, just as he had been trained.

“You are a pig,” Carl shot back at him, spiking Nicko’s arousal even more. The shock he felt over the word was now gone, given how many times Carl had whispered it into his ear whenever he came. Now the word had become a key for unlocking Nicko’s arousal. 

Nicko nodded, gazing submissively into the big man’s eyes. His breathing was heavy and his entire body twitched as the orgasm built.

“Piggy, Piggy, Piggy!” Carl sang teasingly, forcing Nicko’s hardess to erupt explosively yet again.

“My goodness! What on earth have you been eating?” asked Nicko’s mother a few weeks later as he called home for a quick visit.

Nicko could feel his face flushing. “It’s nothing,” he mumbled, trying to conceal his stout gut that had quickly formed and dominated his torso. It was all his family wanted to talk about, demanding explanations from Nicko about exactly what he was doing to gain so much weight so quickly. Didn’t he have any regard for his health? His appearance? His ability to find someone nice to settle down with? Just what was this city life doing to him? 

“She’s only thinking of you, Son,” Nicko’s dad offered later that afternoon, as the pair retreated into the TV room to watch the football. 

“I know, I know,” Nicko huffed, trying to concentrate on the game to see how Carl was playing. Then he winced as Carl went in for a big tackle, destroying the opposition.

“Ouch!” Nicko’s dad hooted. “He’s a nasty piece of work, that Carl Williams! Look at him getting up like nothing’s happened. That poor guy will be out for weeks after that tackle.”

“So?,” Nicko replied defensively. “It wasn’t an illegal tackle. He’s not broken any rules.”

“No, just another guy’s shoulder by the looks of things. Third one this season by my count.”

They both watched the screen as Carl strutted about on the pitch, waiting for the medical team to finish up so that play could resume. Nicko knew the football player well enough to know when he was trying to suppress a proud smile.

“A man that big has no place on the football field,” Nicko’s dad continued. “Look at him! His arms are bigger than my thighs! The game has gone ridiculous!”

But Nicko definitely was watching, feeling blood pumping into his groin. He rubbed his fat tummy, just as Carl would have, suddenly knowing that he wanted to gorge himself stupid on fast food on the way home.

“I weighed myself this morning,” Nicko explained, lying on his front, naked on the bed after a particularly boisterous session with Carl. “Three hundred and forty one pounds,” he smiled, rolling a little and grabbing a wedge of belly fat.

“You have to start eating more then, won’t you?” Carl replied, unimpressed. “You’re only just a little heavier than me.”

Nicko laughed. Whilst the fact was true, his and Carl’s bodies were complete polar opposites in terms of composition.

“I mean it,” Carl stated seriously. “Three fifty by next weekend. Make it happen.”

“Am I the fattest of the guys you keep?” Nicko asked, knowing how Carl supported lots of secret lovers all over the city.

“Not even close!” Carl laughed.

“Do you think I could be, one day?”

Carl looked at him seriously, studying his face in a way that he did not usually. Then his answer, when it came, was actually a lot more considered than anything else that usually came out his mouth. “Why? Do you want to be?”

The feeling of having Carl’s attention was a drug that Nicko could never wean himself off. “For you,” he smiled, “I’d do anything.”

With Nicko’s new enthusiasm and commitment, he felt himself rising up the ranks in Carl’s mind. The athlete came over a lot more and took a very active interest in ensuring that Nicko continued to grow as he’d promised he would. One such perk was having free seats to any of Carl’s games; often getting himself on camera as he gorged on corn dogs in the stands.  

“Steve?” Nicko asked as he recognised the man standing by the rest rooms after the game. “How’re you doing, buddy? I can’t believe I’m bumping into you!”

The young man Nicko had met and made friends with in the training camp failed to recognise him until Nicko introduced himself once more. His jaw dropped and he spluttered and mumbled his way through the conversation, clearly not quite believing that they had once been roommates a little over one year ago.

“How did the training camp work out for you in the end?” Nicko asked. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye to anyone.”

“Yeah, we got used to that,” Steve nodded. “We’d see guys at breakfast and then… gone. Kicked out. I got down to the final thirty or so. But it got so toxic in the end,” he grumbled, reeling off the names of the guys both he and Nicko had despised: the ones who were now making names for themselves in the professional game. “In the end, I was quite happy to leave.”

Nicko looked down to Steve’s body, noticing a stout little stomach under his pumped pecs. 

Steve noticed him looking and he sucked in hids stomach slightly, clearly feeling a little awkward. “I’ve been trying to keep up the training,” he rambled on, clearly used to making excuses for his appearance. “It’s just hard to balance now I’m working full time as well.”

“It’s much easier when you give into it,” Nicko smiled knowingly. 

“Yeah, well…” Steve smiled awkwardly. “I’m not quite ready for that.”

Nicko wondered whether he should tell his old friend that the weight gain wasn’t going to stop; that just like him, Steve was heading on a path to enormous obesity as a result of their time in the training camp. However, he resisted, giving his old friend the goodbye hug he had never been allowed at the camp, and watching the guy’s meaty, round glutes and stubborn love handles as he walked back to his girlfriend who was now out of the restrooms. If only she knew the body her boyfriend would soon inhabit: another victim of his own lust for sporting success.

It was only now that Nicko realised just how involved Carl had been from the beginning, having invested millions in the training camp they had attended, and reaping fifty times as much in return. It was what he loved most in the entire world; never missing a single event day they held, and personally seeing to it that more and more naive college boys were signed up each year.

“You’re such a good pig these days,” Carl grinned, watching Nicko nibbling on the specially made giant doughnuts that fitted perfectly around Carl’s thick erection. “Just seeing you without your clothes on now… you’re so disgustingly obese, and yet… look at you eat!”

Nicko nibbled and licked the remaining bits up quickly and sat up so that Carl could touch and jiggle his enormous body, laughing as the waves of pure fat travelled in such interesting ways through his entire body. 

“How about we get you somewhere nicer to live than this dump?” he asked, scorning as he looked around the plush, luxury apartment. “Somewhere a lot more superchub friendly.”

Nicko nodded, happy to live wherever Carl thought was best. As he had grown, the wage that was deposited into his account each month had been increasing more and more. Carl had always been great at incentives. In a couple more months, he would even be able to buy his own place, should he so wish.

“I’m looking for somewhere very exclusive for my original piggy to live in,” Carl explained, bouncing up and pushing Nicko onto his back on the bed. “I’d like it to be somewhere for you both to live together,” he smiled, picking up another cream filled doughnut and pushing it into Nicko’s submissive mouth.

Chewing quickly and swallowing as much as he could, Nicko nodded with interest. “This is the guy you first went on the training course with? Your fattest boy so far?”

“You wait until you see him!” Carl grinned excitedly. “Mountains and mountains of pure blubber!” he chuckled, stuffing yet another doughnut into Nicko’s mouth and watching as the greedy boy swallowed it down for him “But he’s not always obedient, like you. He still tries to push against my rules on occasion,” he sneered in irritation. “The pig’s almost one hundred pounds heavier than you are,” Carl explained, having never actually given Nicko any insight into the differences between him and the other fatties he kept. “Yet, he still thinks he can defy me at times.”

Nicko looked up at the gorgeous, hulking monster above him. “Don’t worry. I’ll sort him out for you,” he stated with certainty.

Carl threw his head back and laughed. “My disgusting fatty is setting himself a mission, is he?” he mocked. “Well, you do that then, One Percent,” he nodded approvingly. “Turn him into a good piggy, just like you.”

Nicko smiled, delighted to be trusted with such a task. He rolled over, feeling Carl’s large hand smacking an entire palmful of lubricant into his crack. Then he pulled his heavy, fat-filled glutes wide apart to demonstrate that he was ready to be fucked again. Nicko didn’t know exactly when he had stopped caring about anything else in his life; devoting himself entirely to Carl’s wants and needs. He knew that the guy was wicked and manipulative; throwing his money around and flaunting his good looks to get whatever he wanted. He knew as well that the guy could get bored of him and drop him in a flash. But whilst he was here, basking in the limelight, he would enjoy every second of it. 

He would be the very best piggy.  

[demonpiratehuntress]

hard

OPLA!Zoro x F!Reader

Summary - You get jealous when you see a woman chatting him up at the bar, but don't do anything about it cause you two are "casual". It's when he punches the guy trying to chat you up that everything changes.

Warnings - mild swearing, mild violence, angst to comfort

You shouldn't be bothered by it. It's not like he considered what you had serious. He didn't want anything more, or at least that's what he'd told you. So you couldn't tell him you wanted to be official, all you could do was sit and simmer in silence as the woman batted her eyelashes at him and flirtatiously touched his bicep. He wasn't trying to stop her, which only worsened your already sour mood.

"(Name), can I just-" Sanji tried to gingerly remove the glass from your hand, in fear of you gripping it so tight it broke and cut you.

"It's fine, I was just going to get another one," you mumbled, getting up and making your way to the bar. An unwelcome and unpleasant feeling was settling over you, one that was both embarrassing and irritating.

That feeling increased tenfold when you noticed the woman move closer to the unfazed swordsman, who was listening but otherwise just drinking his alcohol. You looked away, swallowing thickly and trying to push down the nauseated feeling that was rising to the base of your throat. You were hurt. You wanted to cry. It was so hard to see what was happening, but you just had to. You took your refill and went back to your seat, unaware of the concerned look Zoro was giving you as you sat down.

He wasn't a complete idiot. He had noticed something was wrong, but with this woman constantly talking to him he didn't have the opportunity to pull away and confront you. He'd have to ask later.

The rest of the crew had vanished, but you assumed that they were chasing Luffy around the small town again in order to stop him from doing something stupid. Sighing, you sat back in your seat and crossed your one leg over the other, eyeing a sudden new arrival at your table. A young man, about your age, with a hopeful gleam in his eyes that you recognised all too well.

"May I ask why such a beautiful lady like yourself is sitting here all alone?"

You glanced at him again, unimpressed, "Dunno where my friends went."

"Then let me keep you company until they return."

You hummed, not disagreeing like you usually would. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was your sadness, but you didn't feel like telling him off. Your gaze wandered to Zoro and the brunette at the bar, your heart sinking lower in your chest as the same sight from before greeted you. Nothing had changed, and it felt like nothing would. At this point, she would probably win him over. The thought had your chest physically aching.

You didn't realise your hand was shaking or that you were tearing up until you felt the guy take the glass from your hand and set it aside before brushing his thumb across your cheek tenderly - with an affection that you craved from Zoro - to swipe the falling teardrop away.

This action did not go unnoticed by the swordsman, and his jaw clenched. How dare that guy touch you like that, the way Zoro wanted to touch you? How dare that guy pretend to like you when all he wanted was to get in your pants? When Zoro was the one who liked you but was too afraid to say it?

"Thanks," you managed a shaky laugh, "I don't know what's wrong with me."

If Sanji were here, he'd probably have smacked this guy's hand away from you already - the thought cheered you up a bit, his antics always making you laugh even on your worst days. If only he could knock some of that romance and possessiveness into Zoro.

"There's nothing wrong with you, you're-"

You were about to cut him off, but someone had beaten you to it. The young man stopped talking, instead letting out a pained cry as he fell sideways, blood now dripping from his bottom lip. You looked up at his assailant, eyes going wide when you saw your green-haired crewmate standing over him, seething.

"We're leaving."

"What-"

You were cut off by Zoro grabbing your wrist and dragging you out of the bar. You were halfway down the street when you pulled your hand away from him angrily and stormed off back to the ship, not saying a word to him. You didn't want to start a scene in the middle of the town, where all eyes would be on you. He sighed in frustration, but followed you quickly so he wouldn't get lost on his way.

When you were both back on the Going Merry, he stopped you from heading straight to your room, grabbing your wrist again. You sighed, but didn't turn to face him.

"What?"

"Why are you mad at me?" He sounded so confused - and he was cute when he was confused - that you almost caved. Almost.

"I wouldn't use 'mad' to describe what I'm feeling," you told him. "So can we just drop it? It's nothing."

"Well it's bothering you enough that you won't even look at me," he shot back, "So what is it? Did I do something?"

You laughed bitterly, finally turning around to face him, "You only made me fall completely and irrevocably in love with you!" He opened his mouth to say something, but you weren't done. "Yes, I know, you don't want a relationship! You've made that perfectly clear. But don't go and punch guys who are actually interested if you're going to happily let women flirt with you!" You were so angry, so upset, so hurt, that you hadn't realised you'd started crying halfway through your rant.

He stepped closer to try and wipe your tears away, but you shook your head and backed away from him, and his gaze hardened, "Do you really think that guy liked you? He just wanted to fuck you!" Just the words had his anger growing again. He wanted to go back and do more to that man, but he wanted to fix this first.

He was doing poorly.

"And how is that any different from you?!" You yelled, throwing your arms up in frustration. Your words took him by surprise, and his eyes widened in shock. "Just...forget it."

Before he could say anything else, before he could stop you, you jerked your hand away from him and retreated to your room, slamming your door shut. He followed silently, his own heart sinking when he stopped outside the door and heard your sobs. He felt even guiltier knowing he'd caused them, and he wanted nothing more than to comfort you. But you clearly didn't want to see him, and he couldn't blame you.

"Idiot," he mumbled to himself as he moved away, planning to ask Nami for help on how to fix this.

*********************************

The next morning, you woke up feeling more exhausted than usual. You curled up in your bed, not wanting to go out and face him again. You wanted to avoid him, feeling too hurt to be around him at the moment. But the crew didn't deserve the same fate, so you sucked it up, swallowed your pride and eventually dragged yourself out of bed. Thankfully, while everyone else was in the kitchen, Zoro was not.

"What happened between you two?" Nami questioned as you took a seat next to her.

"Between me and who?" You feigned confusion, trying not to let it show how badly you wanted to cry again.

"You know who," she deadpanned. "He was in a panic last night, damn near assaulted me on my way onto the ship. I've never seen him so panicked."

You looked down at your food, "We argued. He doesn't feel the way I do."

"Been there," Usopp chimed in, earning a smack from Sanji.

"I'm pretty sure that's not the case," Nami told you.

"Give me a chance, (Name)," Sanji begged, "I won't treat you like this!"

"Shut up, cook," came an annoyed response from the door. "She's mine."

You immediately got up to leave, not wanting to say anything to him, not even wanting to look at him, but your path was blocked. Shoving him out the way wasn't an option, he was a brick wall in that regard. You were not prepared for what happened next.

He fell into your view because he got down on one knee, holding out a small box. Your eyes shot wide open, a gasp leaving yours and everyone else's lips. Only Nami seemed unfazed.

"What are you doing?" You asked shakily.

"What does it look like?" He deadpanned, but he sounded a bit nervous. Like he didn't really want to do it. "Proposing."

"And why are you proposing?" You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms.

"Because I'm sorry?"

"You're proposing because you're sorry?"

"You said you wanted more!"

You burst out laughing then, feeling all your anger fade away. He was truly the biggest idiot you've ever met, and you loved it regardless of how frustrating he could be sometimes. You got down on your knees in front of him, closing the ring box.

"I said I wanted a relationship," you couldn't contain the smile on your face, "Not that I wanted to get married. Not right now, anyway."

"Oh," he put the box away sheepishly. "That's a relief. I wasn't-"

"Ready?" You giggled, "I know. You were barely ready for a relationship."

"Okay, that was uncalled for."

He said it in his usual monotone drawl, but he was smiling. Relieved that you weren't mad at him anymore, and happy to see a smile instead of a frown on your face, he took both your hands in his and gently tugged to tell you to move closer. You obliged, feeling butterflies at the way he looked at you.

Then he leaned in and kissed you, and you felt something change. This kiss was different, it was more passionate and more loving than all of the other kisses you'd shared. This kiss expressed your love for him, and his love for you, and you wouldn't have it any other way.

"I was ready for a relationship with you a long time ago," he admitted when you pulled away, "Just thought you were fine with keeping it casual."

"I actually want to strangle you right now."

He laughed at that, then kissed you again. And again. And again. It became clear he was trying to show the others you were his now, and you wondered if Sanji had inspired this display of affection.

"I'm not very good at this, so just bear with me."

"I'm trying."

"I'm being serious!"

"Me too!"

He shook his head in dismay while you laughed happily, enjoying the fact that you could get on his nerves. He pulled you closer, tugging you against his body and forced your head into his chest to shut you up.

"Wait...Nami, did you help him plan this?"

[randomshyperson]

hello!! I hope you are well. May I add a request to the “touch ask” game? Wanda-Touch-25? Please and thank you. Maybe as a continuation of Wanda and Kryptonian reader?This pairing of my new favourite and you write it so beautifully.

thanks for everything!

Wanda Maximoff x Reader - Drabbles

prompt: stroking the other's arm soothingly | words: 1123 | warnings: fluff, violence (?), previously agreed mind control, some touching but nothing inappropriate (the Avengers would disagree ofc).

challenge masterlist | general masterlist

-&- 

Kryptonians had indestructible and invulnerable bodies. They were bulletproof, heatproof, or coldproof. You could probably out-strength gods like Thor or radioactive monsters like the Hulk.

But magic? Well, that was different.

Somehow, magic could break through every biological barrier in your body and bring you to your knees.

That was precisely why Natasha Romanoff always had Wanda as your training partner.

"Come on, guys, no slacking off. I want four sequences, everyone." The widow announced with a warning clap, while the entire team groaned in unison. Even the super soldiers present had some difficulty completing the demanding exercises of a black widow. 

You were moving to grab your training gloves for the exercise circuit when Natasha called your name. "Not so fast, little alien. You and Maximoff, mat." 

Wanda smiled contentedly at the same time you sighed in discouragement, just as the team got excited and started whistling. See, you were indestructible. Watching you get your ass kicked every now and then was everyone's favorite pastime there. Ignoring Natasha's smirk as you passed her, you tried to stay positive about the whole thing. At least you were working on your humility with your favorite person in the world. 

"I'll go easy on you." Wanda assured you, already on the mat, hands in a fighting position. You chuckle, imitating her defensive stance, even though it wouldn't make any difference. 

"As if."

Truth be told, you're the one who always goes easy on her. Wanda has the magical advantage, of course, but that's it. If you wanted, you could use your speed to easily immobilize her. But the risk of hurting her small human body - a caution you don't need to take with fellow gods or augmented beings - is too high.

So the most you can guarantee to make her training difficult is to dodge her energy attacks, until she loses her patience and stops acting like a sniper, and starts acting like a real witch.

You stumble gently as you feel the familiar invasion. It's like being intoxicated. Wanda is always gentle when she does this. She's learned to hone her mind control very well, without having to reduce her opponents to babbling versions of pure panic. Now, she can enchant them like a mermaid, or perhaps, she only chooses to do it this way with you.

The gym around you becomes a little blurry, and all you see clearly is her, smiling victoriously at you.

"Ready to call it a defeat? Or do you want me to kick your ass a little longer?" She teases as she takes slow steps towards you. It's an illusion, of course, you're sure she hasn't even moved a muscle in reality, and all of this shouldn't have taken more than a second.

You chuckle weakly. This kind of thing has been getting more and more dangerous. Keeping secrets from someone who occasionally plays with your mind is very difficult. Wanda taught you to stay calm in these situations, but all you can do is remind yourself that you're keeping your feelings buried, away from her, and you start to despair.

She notices your anxiety, and the confidence disappears from her expression.

"Hey, are you alright?" She asks, maybe this time, her footsteps towards you were real. You're panicked enough that you can't tell the difference.

Freaking out during a mind control is stupid. And even worse for someone who has powers like yours. Wanda gets close enough to touch your face, and you remember last week when you accidentally saw too much skin when she changed clothes in your room. The shame and guilt return, and you pull away, terrified that she will be able to see that memory.

Your panic in that vulnerable state stimulates your powers, and Wanda exclaims in surprise when the beam of your heat vision advances and grazes near her head. Her fright interrupts the magic, and your release is immediate when Wanda hits your shoulder with a strong magical expel, which throws you about three steps back.

Natasha crosses her arms in disapproval and all the Avengers are looking at you two, while a new hole in the ceiling of the academy appears.

"What the hell you two! What did I tell you about mind tricks?" The black Widow inquires in disapproval, but Wanda is rushing to your support, concern on her features.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to-"

You interrupt her with "I'm fine, don't worry" forcing a small smile. As you try to lift your torso correctly and raise your arm to touch her, you groan in pain and Wanda's eyes widen, as does the whole team. At the feeling, you end up chuckling a little breathlessly. "Wow, that's... surprising. Looks like you set a new record here, Wands. First person to make me feel muscle pain." The team laughs at the joke, but Wanda isn't very happy about it. Natasha forgets about the scolding because she's too interested in discussing with Steve the progress of the two of you in training, and well, you get too distracted with Wanda caressing your arms in an attempt to ease the pain. 

"Is it really that bad?" She asks with a worried frown. She must be feeling guilty enough not to realize what she's doing - how she’s touching you.

You try not to be so pathetic, it's an innocent gesture, but maybe it's too gentle or too warm to ignore. She strokes your arms soothingly, trying to apologize while murmuring that she's sorry for hitting you. And it only takes a moment longer for Wanda to get distracted with what she was doing - Not that you have any way of knowing that she's starting to notice the strong Kryptonian anatomy a little too much, and how feeling strong arms was the real reason she sighed and shook her head, pushing away thoughts she definitely shouldn't be having about her best friend.

Sharing the same warm pink in her cheeks as you, her hands moved away, and Wanda cleared her throat, trying to hide her own reactions while you hid yours.

"So... do you want to get something to eat? I'm starving."

She chuckles shortly. "You're always starving, darling." She teases, and well, she's right so you can't even argue.

Distracted by each other's presence, you soon lose yourself in small talk as you head toward the kitchen, and neither of you notices Sam or Clint grimacing at the scene they've just witnessed.

"That has to be the gayest thing I've ever seen in my entire life." The falcon grumbled in disbelief.

The hawk next to him massaged his forehead in a frown. "I should have retired already. I would have been less traumatized."

They shake their heads in unison, and then go back to training.

[burningcoffeetiger]

Long Post Ahead Beware:

I am back there is something heavy on my heart. As a woman who loves Bridgerton both the books and show, and a fan of all the couples but who's heat has a soft spot for polin. There is something I could not help but notice when it comes to the fans and Nicola and Luke Newton who plays Penelope and Colin a.k.a Polin in the show. Let me start off by saying both Nicola and Luke are part taking and doing something I myself disagree with and personally am not a fan of which is they are dating these young adults starting when Luke's girlfriend was 22 and Nicola's boyfriend was 24 while both Luke and Nicola are well into their 30s. Now again this is my own personally feelings with that I know some people don't seem to care because everyone involved are adults and I will respect their feeling and opinions on that. But this seems to go deep as I have been noticing fans while both Luke and Nicola are both doing the same thing dating these young people, I've noticed that it is Nicola who people seem to take issue with for doing that while they make sure to either ignore any of Lukes misgivings or tell people to keep it in their group chat. They are criticizing the women but are so far gone for this man who they do not know who even go as far to bring the women down to prop up this guy. Any award recognition or praise Nicola got for season three or is getting and its Luke should've to as soon as she is getting these praises. These women are coddling this grown man who shouldn't be above criticism, who no one should be both of these actors you can respectfully criticize. However, that is not what I am seeing, yes, I know that Luke got some negativity throw his way last summer BUT there were people tweeting #weloveyouLuke or Luke Newton deserves an apology. They are not doing that for Nicola any type of complement someone may give her praise for her work or something someone like that Nicola said or did is considered putting her on a pedestal, which I'm not denying that people do that for her or other celebrities because that is the world we live in. But it is so heartbreaking to see that these women have gotten so far gone that they do not see what they are doing, themselves are putting Luke on a pedestal while at the same time making sure no one does that for Nicola.