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ssahotstuff · 2 years

Text

Lie To Me

An Aaron Hotchner x Reader Fic

Aaron Hotchner x Ozark crossover

Part 3

Parts 1&2 along with the characters and a brief description of the story can be found here

Warnings: drinking, cursing, violence, crime, smut, unprotected sex, oral, (f&m receiving) fingering, minors DNI

Word count: 4.1k

As promised, you checked in at The Blue Cat the next day and decided you'd have lunch. You were going to Aaron's for dinner, but he had some stuff to take care of. You'd spent the night with him and left before breakfast, because he had an early start to his day.

"You're doing fine, Charlotte," you reassured her as she stood behind the bar, nodding towards the door. Marty was coming in, taking a seat next to you.

"How'd it go last night?"

You gave him a brief recounting of your night minus the spicy details, and he nodded, his expression unreadable.

"Wendy said he really seems to like you."

You told him that you thought the same thing, and he smiled softly at you.

"I just don't want to see you get hurt, kid. Just be careful."

He left right after that, leaving you and Charlotte fumbling with his warning. You weren't sure why he was so worried about you and Aaron, but he really didn't like the idea of you two together. He was playing nice because you were happy but if things went sour, you knew Marty would step in and say something.

"Dad's just really protective. You're like my sister," Charlotte said, a smile on her face.

"Yeah, the older, funnier sister," you teased, but she didn't disagree. You went back home, spending some of your much needed free time cleaning your house. You hadn't really been around lately, and it showed. You did laundry, almost losing track of time until Aaron called you.

"I'll be home in thirty minutes. We're making pizza," he told you, excitement clear in his voice. When you told him you had the weekend off, he was quickly asking to spend more time with you--it was cute.

"I need to shower. I've been cleaning all day," you told him, and he told you to just walk over when you were ready, that he'd be waiting for you.

You showered and shaved, putting on layers of lotion and a spritz of perfume in all of the right places, deciding you'd wear something cozy so you'd be prepared for later. When you knocked, he'd already changed too, and he'd gotten the memo on the dress code, because he was comfy too. He greeted you with a hug first and then dipped down to kiss you, pulling you inside by the waist.

"I didn't start without you," he told you, letting you wash your hands and get to it, rolling up your sleeves so the two of you could make dough. You made two separate pizzas, one for him and one for you. You sat on the couch watching a movie while they cooked, his hand in yours.

"I don't have to work tomorrow. I was thinking maybe you could stay the night and spend the day with me tomorrow."

You kissed him, nodding your head.

"I'd like that."

You ate dinner and moved to his bed, where he stripped down to his boxers immediately before he came to cuddle, wrapping his arms around you as you laid in his lap. You decided to initiate something a little different, rolling over onto your stomach, peering up at him through your lashes.

"What are you doing, pretty girl?" You could see him getting hard through his boxers, so you reached out to palm him through the fabric, watching his whole body visibly tighten at your touch. You put your fingers in the waistband of his boxers and pulled them down, taking his cock in your hands. You found a rhythm with your wrist, pumping him up and down until you took him in your mouth, flattening your tongue against him so you could take all of him. He hissed, his hand on the back of your head as he guided you on his member, watching with his mouth slightly agape as saliva coated his cock and he entered your mouth with ease.

"Oh sweetheart. So fucking good," he said through clenched teeth, tears brimming your eyes as you gagged on his cock. You used your hand on the rest of his length, taking most of him in your mouth, occasionally stealing a glance at him from your spot below. He looked properly fucked--his pupils wide and dilated, his hair a wreck on his head. You hadn't even gotten started yet--not if you had anything to say about it anyway.

You didn't stop until you felt his salty release in the back of your throat, swallowing every last drop that he'd give you. He released his grip on your hair, bringing you forward so he could kiss you hard on the mouth. You draped your body over his as his tongue made its way into your mouth, and his hands came to rest at your sides, lifting your t-shirt slightly to expose your skin.

"Your mouth feels so fucking good," he said against your lips, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth. He laid you down, his fingers falling to the waistband of your pants, lightly touching you over the fabric. You squirmed against the mattress, making him crawl between your legs hastily, pulling your pants and panties down in one swipe.

"You seem desperate," he told you, his voice still endearing as he said it. He loved it, loved how badly you wanted him, and that you weren't afraid to show it.

"Because I am," you panted, a cocky grin spreading out over his face as he buried his face between your thighs, making your eyes roll back as his tongue expertly flicked at your clit. You were lost in euphoria, your head sinking into the pillow and your brain turning to mush.

"I wish you could see how pretty you look right now, so relaxed," he cooed as you reached the first of many highs, your eyes squeezed shut as your body trembled. He kissed your thighs, your hips, every inch of you below the waist was under his tongue at some point. He finally focused his energy back on your clit, sucking furiously, his arms keeping you pinned to the bed.

"Fuck, Aaron--" the sweet rush of your orgasm on his tongue was like fuel to a fire; he only yearned for more. He slowly teased your entrance with his fingers before adding them to the mix, the fluid combination heavenly, flooding all of your senses with nothing but pleasure. It didn't take much to have you a whimpering mess on his bed, your sweet little sounds like music to his ears.

"I just can't get enough of you," he said as he sat up, lining up with you so he could sink into you, your walls stretching to accommodate him as you lifted your legs. He put them over his shoulders before he began to slip in and out of you, his hips smacking yours in perfect timing. You knew it was only a matter of time until you were hurdling over the edge again, because your nails were already digging into the bed, your legs shaking as you came.

"I'm obsessed," you choked, addicted to the way he felt as he was pounding into you, completely opposite of how he'd been the day before. This time was greedy, possessive. It took your breath as you struggled to hold your eyes open, blinded by such immense pleasure.

You were super sensitive, coming from the smallest, slightest movements, and he was in heaven watching. Each time you came, he would whisper the sweetest words, telling you how much he enjoyed having you for himself. It was easy to get caught up in the way he made you feel-- ten feet tall and bullet proof.

"You're divine, sweetheart. I could watch you for hours on end," you felt it, the sticky, warm substance fill you up as he tried to stay upright, pulling out of you so he could sit down. His breathing was ragged, his chest heaving as he leaned against your legs, propped up so you wouldn't make a mess. He grabbed a towel and cleaned you off, climbing in the bed, letting you hold him, his head on your chest.

"Get some sleep," you urged him, sliding down on the pillow next to him. He fell asleep letting you hold him close, and he didn't move an inch all night.

✨✨✨

Things had been going well with Aaron. You usually saw him after you came home from work for the night. He'd come over and walk you to his place, although you warned him with summer approaching that your nights would get a lot later. He didn't seem to mind, as long as he got to see you.

You were just finishing up closing the place, your music playing softly through the speakers as you cleaned. Marty had delivered on the sound system, and it worked like a dream. You could hear your music everywhere in the restaurant, and you were grateful for it for summer. You'd be able to pack the place full and learn what the crowd favorite songs were, so you could keep the place energetic.

Ruth had just showed up for her nightly beer, followed promptly by Marty, who looked distraught.

"What's going on?"

He looked between you and Ruth, who seemed to already know what was happening, but she chose to say silent.

"Just some shit with Wendy. Nothing you need to worry about. How's the new sound system working out?"

You told him all about how Jonah helped you set it up and he showed you how to work it. You wanted to make the Blue Cat the summer spot that everyone came to hang out at, and now you were one step closer to packing the place full.

"Sounds like you have the place ready for the busy season," he popped the top on his beer, sitting between you and Ruth at the bar. He'd been acting a little more normal lately, despite how stressed he seemed. He wasn't warning you about Aaron every time you saw him, so that was a plus.

"Almost. I'm buying some lights to put up behind the bar, make this place a little brighter."

He grinned, something that didn't happen often, obviously happy that you were working things out to your liking and that more importantly, he didn't have to deal with it.

"Charlotte wants to come stay with you soon. I told her as soon as school was out, she could," he told you, but they both knew she was welcome at your house any time.

"I miss her, we'll do a bonfire to celebrate school being out as soon as she has her last day," you decided, making Marty pat you on the back.

"You know, my kids really enjoy spending time with you. You've become something of a role model for Charlotte and I really appreciate that. She and Wendy...Wendy has her own things going on right now, and the kids feel like she's forgotten about them."

You knew Wendy was a busy woman but she loved her kids; obviously there was much more going on than you knew about. Charlotte hadn't told you anything, but you could tell there was tension.

"I love your kids, Marty. They can come spend time with me whenever they want," you promised him, and then it was Ruth's turn to speak up.

"When you first moved here, I thought, 'no way is that girl really as sweet as she claims to be' but I was wrong. You're a regular ray of fuckin' sunshine," she cackled, making you blush like crazy. You had always tried to be good, see the good in other people before you judged them for the bad. It's part of why you had grown so attached to the Byrdes. They were good people, and you could see that in the way they ran things. Family came first to them, and that was a moral you'd always wanted for yourself, despite having no family of your own. Marty knew you were alone in the world and made you a seat at his table with no questions asked.

"I grew up around a lot of people that were cold and mean for no reason. I always told myself I never wanted to end up like that." It was the most you'd ever opened up to them about home, but they appreciated your honesty and they understood why you could never go back. It was too much for any one person to handle, and although you felt like you still had obligations back home, returning wasn't an option, not now that you were finally free.

"You've done more in three months than anyone in your hometown has ever dreamed of doing," Marty told you, trying to make you feel a little bit better. He knew you didn't like talking about home, so he'd always try to lighten the mood when you did.

"It's a dead end town. If I didn't leave, I would've been stuck too."

Ruth polished off her beer before grabbing another, and the bell signaling someone's arrival went off, and no one was expecting to see Charlotte standing there, soaked from the rain.

"Charlotte, what are you doing out this late? You have school tomorrow," Marty grabbed a bar towel so she could dry off some, but you noticed the tears before he did, rushing forward to check on her.

"Are you okay?" Marty looked back at you confused for a moment until she shook her head, water droplets pooling in the floor at her feet.

"Mom kicked me out! She's lost her mind, Dad! This new deal she's worked out has corrupted her mind," it was your turn to be confused--Wendy had thrown her daughter out in the rain.

"What do you mean she kicked you out?"

Charlotte rolled her eyes because sometimes Marty was naïve--he couldn't see past his love for Wendy sometimes, and it made him blind to some of the more shitty things Wendy put him through, like for instance, when she cheated on him. Ruth had told you about it, and it was before they ever moved to the Ozarks, but it still gave you a bad taste in your mouth when you spoke to Wendy sometimes. You loved her, but quite often she did things you couldn't exactly agree with, and this was one of them.

"She told me if I didn't like what she was doing for our family, then I could leave. She shoved me out the door! She didn't let me get anything, she just sent me on my way," she sniffled, and you opened your arms for her, holding her tight when she collapsed against you, filled with emotion, hurting deeply at the fact that her mother could be so cold. You knew if you ever had kids, you'd never kick them out--not when the world was a dangerous place and they were safer with you.

"Your mom is a little power hungry right now. She thinks we're in competition. She did this because of me, Charlotte. I'm sorry." Marty hugged her, Ruth standing by idly while the exchange took place. She didn't care for Wendy either, but you were both shocked by the fact that she'd tossed her daughter out.

"Let her stay with me until Wendy quits whatever this is. I'll make sure she goes to school and keeps her homework done," you offered, and it only took half a second for Marty to agree. Charlotte seemed content too, much happier than she'd been moments prior.

"Do you think you could do me a huge favor?" He asked, arms crossed over his chest. You nodded, handing Charlotte your keys so she could go start up the car and turn the heat on; she needed to dry up. She'd been walking in the rain for easily an hour, maybe longer.

"I need to talk to Wendy and it's not going to be pretty. Can I bring Jonah to you? Tomorrow is testing day for seniors so Jonah doesn't have to go," you told him to just bring him over tonight, and he could stay in one of the spare bedrooms. Jonah and Charlotte were the only people to ever use them.

You all split ways and you tried to get Charlotte to talk to you on the ride home.

"She's just trying to be more successful than Dad. She feels threatened, like she has to accomplish more to be something she's not. She's always ever just been our mom. Now she's something else," she said sadly as you pulled in to your driveway. Aaron was already walking across the street, stopping at your door when he saw Charlotte was with you.

"Is everything okay?"

You didn't want to tell Marty's business so you just told him the kids were staying the night with you until Marty had a chance to talk to Wendy. He nodded in understanding, but Charlotte was quick to invite him over for you.

"Don't let us ruin your plans. I'm basically grown, we can all have a coffee and wait on Jonah," she loved using your fancy espresso coffee maker, so Aaron agreed to come in--he'd never been to your place before, so he looked around a bit while you got Charlotte some dry clothes and changed out of your jeans into something more comfortable. When you found him, he was pouring three cups of coffee in the kitchen, turning around briefly to kiss your forehead.

"I won't stay long, I know it's late. I just wanted to see you," he said, handing you a mug while the two of you sat at the table to wait on Charlotte.

"I'll always be thankful that you let me keep clothes here," she said as she joined you at the table after grabbing her coffee.

"You can keep whatever you want here. You know that," you wanted her and Jonah to feel at home with you, somewhere safe they could turn to if they needed you.

"Do you need me to work tomorrow? I can come after school," she told you, and you told her that was fine, it would give you a little bit of time off to get things in order for her and Jonah in case they ended up staying longer than a couple of days.

"I'm going to head out, but I'll be up later if you want to call me," he kissed you quickly before he told you and Charlotte bye, and shortly after Marty showed up with Jonah in tow.

"Wendy isn't even at home," Marty told you, explaining that there was something going on that involved a baby and Darlene Snell--which didn't sound like a good combination to you.

"When did she get a baby?"

"When Mason Young went missing, she got Zeke."

Zeke was the local pastors son--he'd been missing for a couple of weeks now. You didn't know Marty and Wendy were involved with Mason, but you weren't surprised. They knew everyone.

"So Wendy's trying to get the baby?"

He nodded, telling you that there was a lot he didn't know about the situation, like when Mason would be coming back, and who would keep the baby permanently if Darlene didn't.

"Wait, Marty, you don't need a baby in your house," you rationalized, and she shrugged knowingly before telling you there was nothing he could do to stop Wendy once she got started.

"Zeke's going to live with us?" Charlotte asked, Marty told her that he wasn't exactly sure what was going to happen, but that they'd be home soon.

"I'll call you tomorrow and let you know what's going on," he promised before he left, so you let the kids get comfortable in their rooms and went to call Aaron, who answered the phone like he'd been waiting on you.

"I'm glad you called," he yawned, making you smile to yourself. You loved his sleepy voice, how soft and sweet he could get, but his voice would drop an octave and send shivers down your spine.

"I didn't know I was going to have the kids, I was about to leave for the night when Charlotte showed up."

He made a soft hum while he thought about what to say, afraid of disrespecting your friendship with Marty.

"You're a good friend. Not many people would keep someone else's kids at the drop of a hat."

You explained your love for his kids and why they meant so much to you but then again, he already understood. You hadn't talked about your family and it was that very reason that he knew why you and the Byrdes were so close.

"Can I see you tomorrow, assuming your life returns to normal?" You told him even if it didn't, that you'd make time for him, and he was glad to hear it. He was tired so he got off the phone, leaving you to dream about him.

The next day, Jonah came to work with you. He tweaked the sound system a bit, clearing up any audio issues you might run into, but otherwise he sat at his computer the vast majority of the day.

"If things don't work out at home, can we live with you?"

You weren't sure how to answer him so you were honest with him.

"You're always welcome at my house, but your Dad is going to sort this all out and you'll be home soon."

Your afternoon went by quickly after that, and then Charlotte showed up to help lighten the load. Your day was full of visitors, from your regulars to Aaron, who showed up right before you were about to close for the night. You didn't know whether or not to wait around for Marty or Ruth because you hadn't heard from either of them all day.

"Will you be up later?" You put in the order for his food and sat at the bar with him, but only for a minute so you could help Charlotte clean.

"For you, I'll wait up all night."

You made plans to sneak off to his place after the kids were in bed, because it was officially the weekend and they didn't have school tomorrow, so you could be a little more lenient on what they could do as far as staying up later. You knew they were probably exhausted though from such a long day. Jonah had came into work with you early, and Charlotte had testing all day and worked afterwards.

By the time you made it home, you took a shower and the house was quiet when you came out. You checked on everyone; Jonah was sleeping and Charlotte was about to lay down, she'd showered too. You told her you were going across the street, to text you if she needed you and she told you they'd be fine, that they were old enough to hang out across the street for a while so you could see Aaron.

You were off to his place and he greeted you at the door with a kiss, tugging you inside hastily, his mouth still attached to yours.

"I've missed you," he mumbled against your lips, his hands on your waist. He led you to the couch, letting you straddle his lap as you kissed him, your arms looped around his neck.

"I've missed you. Was glad you stopped by to see me earlier," seeing him always made your day; it was always a pleasant surprise when he showed up to your job, even if he only stayed for a little while.

"I have to see you when I can. I hope you don't mind me visiting you at work," he was tugging your shirt off, working on shedding your bra too.

"I love it when you come see me," you admitted, standing up so he could undress you, his eyes trailing over every inch of you.

"I hope you'll be able to come spend the night soon. I miss having you in my bed," he peppered kisses all over your chest, teeth grazing your nipples lightly as you mounted his lap and worked to free him of his pajamas and boxers. Once you had him naked, you lined him up with your entrance and wasted no time sinking down on him, making you groan in unison as he found himself buried inside of you.

"So lucky to have you," you whispered as you rode him, his hands helping you out so you didn't get tired. You tossed your head back as you came, and he cupped your face lovingly so he could watch you come undone.

"Gets better every time," he said under his breath, pounding into you from below as he held you upright. It was new, intense. Each guided stroke had you trembling, your orgasm right around the corner. You finished with him, shaking as he filled you, holding you in place on his lap.

"God, I've missed this with you. Not seeing you last night had you on my mind heavily today," he breathed, kissing you softly as you laid against his chest.

"I'll come back over tomorrow. Hopefully Marty gets his shit together soon."

Master tags: @wheelsupkels @periodtcevans @hausofwhores @criminallyobsessedcm @tojithesourcerkiller @fireworksinthesky

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #hotch #ssa aaron hotchner #ssa hotchner #aaron hotchner smut #hotchner #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner au #jason bateman ozark #Ozark #ssa aaron hotchner smut #ssa hotchner smut

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princess-pill-enjoyer · 1 year

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Beuh I just put two and two together.

I hate benadryl. I do

And for that.. I will be pouring water into the rest of the pills I have on me annd wiping my hands of that whole disaster. Jesus it's getting on my nerves. I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it.

It's gross. The taste is nasty, the side effects fucking suck, and I withdraw HORRIBLY. My eyes get red and puffy, nose gets red, I'm just constantly hot, I risk throwing up just by having an empty stomach, I get so moody, I stress so hard about it I now dissociate when I take em, my memory is worse, its harder to form a sentence

I cant take it anymore. I'd rather look like a horrible, shitty person that does literally nothing and absolutely HATE myself for it too than ever go back. Im done

It was a long and hard journey and I find it a bit ironic that it took me smoking weed to stop afterall

Ever since my attempt I just.. cant. I'm so grateful that I finally found some strong shit to replace that feeling. I'm wondering if im starting a problem with constantly needing to smoke tbh. But seriously... not having to worry about my fucking liver health and ulcers has been a forgotten blessing

I still hate the people of the r/dph subreddit. I swear it is the most useless place in the world. Not only do you rarely get anything but people talking about the hallucinative aspect of the shit but you ALSOO get shamed and sneered at when you actively have a problem. It's the stupidest shit I've ever seen. I felt so lost throughout all this. Slowly learning the dos and donts of this stupid substance was a process I wish I didn't go through

Anyway yeah. Fuck dph I'm tired of dealing with the effects. I don't even like the high anymore everytime I get on it as of lately I've just get mad and hurt myself with it. That's fucking all. And I'm tired of hurting myself. Shit is old

Annnd I'm gonna keep my head straight from here on hopefully. I don't really want to kill myself now that I see it's really the leftover benadryl talking. I uh... don't really want to go back to my old job.. so I'll be applying to some irl places instead. Hopefully that'll encourage to stop smoking so damn much as well. I'm going to call into sallie Mae snd hopefully get another deferment and my uni debt I'll be able to skate by this month but from here on I'll keep up with that better

I'll upload proof this time since I'm finally giving up my strict anonymity thing. Probably tomorrow.. I'm exhausted.

God uh for one, I already semi knew I'd be okay THE DAY I QUIT and I put in so many applications. I even got a response back.. but my dumbass was so hellbent on ending my shit I not only didn't call em back, I blocked they number so they couldn't try to do any followup. Stupid shit 😭

I think I'm glad I did it though. I wanna do something completely different this time and I applied to all office jobs. I know I'd run into the same issue if I do some more work from home officey/customer service shit rn

And hopefully... if nothing else.. I can save the money to make the appointments to get diagnosed. If I can manage just keeping a job for longer than 2 weeks, I'll make enough money to pay off my debts with no problem.

I dont want to smoke, I don't want to play anything, I don't really wanna play or watch anything anymore, I just want to be sad and get some money to get myself fixed atp

Anyways L. I feel dumb ah. I'm ready to move on

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celenatriestowriteagain · 2 years

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17 May

I'm not feeling well. We have a long weekend but I don't feel rested at all. Together with K and my other flatmate we went to 5 unit viewings this weekend (2 each on Saturday and Sunday and 1 today), and got 3 rejections. It doesn't feel nice to be rejected obviously, but it feels shittier to think of the sacrifices that we have to make if we want affordable rent.

I'm frustrated because I don't want to have to worry about these things. I want a place with enough space and natural light without roaches and doesn't eat into our savings, and with Singapore apparently that is too much to ask. I read that the rent is at its most expensive right now, and I can see it. The competition among potential tenants is crazy.

So that's what occupied my mind and energy and time over the weekend, and the week's just starting but I am already TIRED. How do people even keep being level headed these times is beyond me. Maybe I need to go out more and talk to people more. I am also tired of hearing myself do nothing but complain you know. Um anyway. I'm gonna try and gaslight myself into thinking positive:

we have time. we got a few more weeks to go before we have to move out

there's gonna be some cash arriving in october i think, so hang in there

I got nothing else. Tomorrow there's a lunch with the rest of the PD team so that's nice. I'm trying to look forward to it but if I'm being honest I just dread it. I need to think of positive topics so I don't just offload all my compaints about work and living in Singapore. On Wednesday there is a 1:1 with Alex, and on Friday there's karaoke so that should be fun.

Good natured topics for tomorrow's lunch

upcoming holidays? talk about my recent holiday in Sydney. How I was terrified of spiders and ghosts and thieves but I didn't encounter any of that. How I met some nice people and I got called a little girl. How I saw a koala and a kangaroo and a wombat an emu a tasmanian devil etc. How people were so nice and will ask you about your day and will thank bus drivers and will help you with your bags. How trips to the cbd was capped at $1 per day. How it didn't rain one bit. How I caught a show and a drag performance and a random gig.

ask them about any upcoming holidays?!

do they believe in ghosts?? superstitious? like do they buy toto

ask about how they're doing idk, what are they spending their time on

what did you do over the long weekend?!?

going into viewings, bidding and losing, but aside from that...

how I watched my teammate's favorite movies. like secret life of walter mitty and its connection with severance. hot fuzz and how gory it was in the end. to the pub! and the multiverse movies and how everything everywhere all at once was superior

how I'm planning to see back to the future and lord of the rings next

how I've seen some interesting horror movies lately like X and Saint Maud

X's antagonist is unlike anything seen before. Saint maud was just a trip

also liked CODA

have they seen anything interesting lately?!

karaoke on friday. do they want to join

ummm idk do they play any games?! i play genshin impact but it's got delayed updates because of the covid situation in china idk

how it feels great to be able to go out without masks now, and how nice that we don't need to do tracetogether at malls, but now the novelty has worn off and I'm back at staying at home again

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dragon-kazansky · 3 years

Text

Dangerous | Helmut Zemo

AU! Race car driver Zemo 😎

Gender neutral reader

Collage by @realremyd

[Masterlist]

[Previous chapter] - [Next chapter]

Part 2

Race day. The whole track was buzzing with excitement. Over the last two weeks, Zemo had been working hard and improving his car. Between all that, he was thinking about you.

It was strange how someone you met once, and hardly knew, made such an impact on your life. He wondered if you got the ticket. Would you even come?

He stood by his car. People had come to see him, but his eyes were only looking for one person. You had yet to make an appearance. Disappointment hung heavy in his chest.

Tony Stark stood across the way from him. He was chatting to his fans, smiling smugly and relishing in all the attention he was receiving.

If Zemo knew one thing, he wasn't going to let Stark win today. He glares at him as he takes a seat. He sighs. He had hoped you would have come. The thought of you helps cool his thoughts of the other driver.

It won't be long until they are called to the starting lane.

Zemo gets up and grabs his helmet, thinking to make a few last minute checks before they're needed. He would deal with the fact you were a once in a lifetime meeting and get on with the day. The disappointed had settled hard.

He turns his back and was about to make his way to his crew when a voice stopped him.

"I hope I didn't keep you waiting."

He turns around quickly, relieved at the sound of your voice. He grins when his eyes land on you.

"You did, but you're here now. Though, I think you owe me for keeping me waiting."

You smile. "I'm sorry. Getting here was a hassle. I was worried I was going miss the race entirely."

He couldn't stop smiling.

"I'm glad you made it."

The cheering behind you caught your attention. You turned to see Stark climbing into his car. The crowd around him was being asked to disperse.

"I won't let him win today."

You turn to see Zemo looking at you, completely ignoring what's happening behind you.

"He really riles you up, doesn't he?"

"How could you tell?" He asked, not meaning for a reply, but surprised by your response a the same.

"You're clenching your fists and jaw. Is he, like, your enemy?"

Zemo gives a heartless chuckle.

"Something like that."

You stepped closer to him and smiled softly. This closely, he could smell the fragrance you had put on today. You leaned in and kissed his cheek.

"A good luck charm. I'll be cheering for you."

You're not sure where your bravery had come from, but you wanted to do something to get his mind off Stark. He looked a little surprised, but he looked more smug than that.

"My own little good luck charm? Perhaps things will be different today."

You smile as you step back. The drivers are being called to the start line. Zemo doesn't quite want to leave you yet, but duty calls.

"That's your stand," he says, pointing to the seating area above him. "I'll be back here when the race ends, meet me."

"Alright."

Zemo has someone help you up to your seat in the stands. He gets into his car as you go, looking up once before driving his car over to the start.

You don't take your eyes off his car.

That tense atmosphere seems to fall over the whole racetrack. It was just like last time. Only there was something more here for you. You were here for Zemo this time, at his request.

The silence was thick. All you could hear was your breathing, and then that beautiful sound. Those engines revving. It was as if at that moment you forgot how to breathe.

They were off.

You were already clutching your seat.

You had a little bit of research on Helmut Zemo. He had won a couple of races before, but had never beaten Tony Stark. There was a rivalry there. This had been going on a few months. Zemo was insistent on beating him at least once.

Maybe, just maybe, today will be that day.

Your eyes flick to the screen where the cars will be picked up now they're out of sight. You can feel your stomach dropping as you watch eagerly. Zemo and Stark are once again locked in battle with each other. They are ready so far ahead of the others and you wonder how they do that so fast. You bite your lip as you watch the purple car.

This would mean so much to Zemo if he beat Stark. It would put Tony down a few notches, maybe then he wouldn't be so high and mighty.

You have no idea what happened. It was as if you suddenly zoned back in to the race. Attention brought back to the screen at the sound of screeching tyres.

You tense up.

Luckily no damage had been done, but both Stark and Zemo had spiralled out of control, both cars now facing the wrong way. You could see them on the screen.

The others will catch up soon. They don't have much time to keep their places if they're going to get back into the race.

Stark's car sparks to life. You feel your heart drop as he takes off again.

Zemo cannot get his car to start again.

Banging his hand against the steering wheel he glares after Stark. Another race he will not win. No doubt Tony will have something to say later.

You can only watch as Helmut climbs put of his car and walks off the tracks. All the other cars speed past him. His car won't be crossing the finishing line today.

You don't care about the rest of the race, you leave tour seat and hurry down to the barricade. You would wait for Zemo like you said you would.

He doesn't return to the stop until the race is over, Stark's name being hollered from every direction. He comes over with a hard look on his face, jaw clenched in anger. His helmet was in his hand, hair slightly messy from it's removal.

He stalks over to where you are waiting. He doesn't even look at you as he drops the helmet and sits down, head in his hands.

"Zemo?"

He doesn't say anything. He just sits there and sighs. Your lucky kiss didn't bring him much luck.

There was no way you could be impressed with his skills after that. He had wanted to impress you today. He had wanted to cross that finish line for you. He failed.

He swears it's Stark's fault they collided like that. Now his team had to go fetch the abandoned car and fix it.

One day. One day he would beat that man.

"Zemo?"

He lowers his hands and turns his head to the side, looking at you with gentle eyes. He has a little smile on his face, but you could tell he was utterly defeated.

"I'm sorry."

"What for?" You ask, confused by the sudden apology.

"For wasting my lucky charm."

You chuckle softly and sit down on the tarmac by his chair.

"It's not a big deal. I'm just glad you're alright. I know how dangerous this can be."

He nods. People can die in this job.

"You have been doing some research?"

"Yes. I wanted to understand your world better." You look down sheepishly. It felt strange confessing that to him.

"My world is fast," he says, voice dropping in volume.

You both ignore the cheering happening in the distance. Tony was receiving his reward as his team parks his car opposite you.

"I like the fast lane, I found out. I'd like to stay in it a little longer."

Zemo's gaze landed on you.

"Would you like to join me for a drink?" He asks, wanting to take his mind off the race.

"I would love to," you smile up at him.

"Wait for me by the gate, I'll pick you up once I've changed."

You nod and stand up. You make your way to the exit of the racetrack, waiting by the gate. Zemo goes to get out of his racing gear.

As you wait, Stark makes his exit. He spots you, grinning.

"Waiting for someone?"

"Yes," you reply curtly.

"You're wasting your time on him. You know that? Not only is he a danger on the track, but off it too." Tony peered at you over his shades, "consider that a warning."

"I think I can judge him for myself, but thank you."

Tony shrugs and drives off.

The nerve of that man! Granted, he didn't sound he meant ill feelings as he said it, but that fact he even felt the need to say that angered you. Sure, you hadn't known Zemo all that well, and everything you did know you got off the internet, but you felt more than capable to make a judgement yourself.

Tony was out of sight now.

You turned when you heard another car approach. It was a different one from the one he had two weeks ago. You smile as he pulls up in front of you. You climb in.

Zemo drives you both away from the track.

"What happened to the race car?"

"My crew will take it back and look at the damage. I'll check in with them tomorrow. I have some changes to make to it."

"What happens now? I mean, since you didn't cross the line," you ask, wanting to know more.

"I'll be set back a bit, but I'll overcome it. One day I will beat Stark. His winning streak will have to end at some point, and I would very much like to do it before the racing season ends."

"How long do you have?"

"There are three more races before the season ends."

"I believe in you."

For some reason those words set off something inside of him. He glances at you briefly as a smile spreads across his face. Perhaps it was fate that brought you to him. He would like to think that.

Zemo knee exactly where to take you. A good quiet place for drinks.

The bar was nice. Nothing flashy or loud, just a casual place for drinks. Zemo and yourself sat in the back, out of immediate eyesight of everyone else. He wanted to spend this time with you, and only you.

"What else did you learn in your research?" He asks, wanting to kick off the conversation.

"You've only been racing a handful of years, only being racing professional a few months, and yet you're super talented on the track. I had to look up some of the racers, most of which have been racing professionally for years. Yet, you're up there with them," you say, sounding impressed.

"I'm good at what I do, no doubt about that."

"How did you get into racing?"

"I love cars. Back home, I have a collection of classic models. You have only seen two of the cars I own. One day I decided to give racing a go. The thrill that runs through your veins when you're speeding around that track, it is unlike anything I've ever felt before. Adrenaline takes over once your foot is on the pedal. All you see is the track ahead."

You smile as you listen.

"I could get used to going to races."

Zemo looks at you with soft eyes, a smile tugging at his lips.

"I would very much like it if you would."

"I can't guarantee I can be at them all. I have to work too. My job isn't nearly as cool as yours though."

"How about this, for every race you come watch, I take you out for drinks after," he offered.

"Are you... asking me out?"

"Only if you attend the races," he states.

You look down at your drink.

"I'll see what I can do, I suppose."

He chuckles, "I'll take it."

"So, there's only three races left, right?"

"Yes," he confirms.

"You have to win all three to beat Stark this season?"

"Yes."

"Can you do it?"

Zemo looks at you with focused eyes. His lips pulled into a smug grin.

"I'm going to do it."

"When is the next race?"

"Two weeks. They are two weeks apart each."

"Right." You read that online. "What's the plan from here. How do you spend the time between races?"

"Improving. Tomorrow I will meet with my crew and see the damages done to my car. I will do whatever I have to do to get it back in top form. I will improve it and test it. Over and over if I have to. I will beat Stark."

You smile.

"I know you can do it. You can."

"Well, if you keep saying it, then I know I can too," he winks at you. You chuckle and try to hide your smile by sipping your drink.

This was nice. You would get to do this again as long as you attended the rest of the races. You made a silent promise to do whatever you could to attend the remaining races. Work be damned!

When you finished your drink, Zemo drove you back to your hotel. Much like last time, you both lingered in the car before you went inside.

"Would you like to come to the garage tomorrow? I could show you what we do behind the scenes," he offers. If he was being genuinely honest, be just wanted to spend more time with you.

"Sure. I'm free tomorrow, but then I'll have to catch the next train home."

"I'm honoured you went to all the trouble to come see me race again," he smiled.

"You invited me. I wasn't going to pass up the chance to see you again," you blurted out.

You sit there in shock. Zemo looks extremely proud and smug.

"I mean-"

"No, no. Don't say any more," he laughs.

You're a blushing mess as you climb put of his car.

"See you tomorrow then?"

You just nod and head inside, embarrassed beyond belief. You can't believe you said that.

Zemo drives away with a smile.

@ajeff855 @moonstuffsteve @sky-writes-stuff @lieutenantn @lostghostgirl94 @friday18eo @yaskna @my-blood-is-maple-syrup @gingerwriter97 @lunamooney2406 @wilder-fangirl @nectav @whovianayesha @thesuitkovian @cathrin2405 @deathtothepatriarchy @belle82devart @dxrksxul06 @killeromanoff @alex-the-nb

#helmut zemo x reader #zemo #zemo x reader #helmut zemo #baron helmut zemo #marvel #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier

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vannybarber · 3 years

Text

Make Up Your Mind

Summary: You're ready, but Chris is making it seem like he isn't.

Words: 1.4k

Warnings: angst, SMUT, swearing, implied smut, insults.

Your body finally acknowledged the soreness between your legs when you get up to move to Chris' bathroom. You reach for a wash cloth on the rack and clean yourself up. Chris follows behind you with a shit eating grin on his face, clearly reminiscing the previous events.

Chris and you have been friends for about 2 years after working with him in Knives Out. You guys' childish personalities clicked right away and were literally each other's best friends. Only about 7 months back, you boldly told him that you wanted to fuck him. He was nothing less than down and you guys have been friends with benefits ever since.

Well up until recently. You both started acting like real couple. Going out to nice restaurants, touching in public, spending nights at each other houses and visiting each other's families. You both were enjoying the feeling of being together all the time, even without an official label.

Being around him so much grew out even more feelings. Not friendly feelings. But more intimate and longing feelings. To be with him. As his girl. More than just a friend to talk to. More than a nice body to play with.

There had been too many internet speculations asking why you guys don't just date already. Hell, you were asking the same damn question. But unfortunately, you know why. And you hate it.

"That little freaky number you did in there was something else, Y/N. 'Thou art truest freak' in the words of Shakespeare." He laughs, watching for your reaction. You just look at him smiling and shaking your head. The things that come out this man's mouth. You know damn well Shakespeare never said that shit.

"I told you from the start, boo. I know how to put it down." He eagerly agrees, hanging his wash cloth up and checking his fingers.

You observe him through the mirror. His bushy auburn eyebrows furrowed together while he picks at his nails. His sharp narrow nose that you feel against your right cheek everytime you guys make out. His beautiful red lips you've felt in many places on your body, preferably in places your eyes can't see. And his eyes. The ones that hold so much purity and happiness. Those perfect eyes.

This man is everything you want, but he just wasn't ready. That's the catch. That's the thing you absolutely hated. He had major commitment issues and people around you had more of a chance in anything than him ever settling down. It literally caused you physical pain. Because you couldn't change his feelings, no matter how many conversations you guys had or how good you fucked him.

Walking back into the room, you grab your bodycon dress you came over in and put it back on your body. You gather all your other articles of clothes throwing them into your handbag and take it out into his living room. He follows behind you in his grey sweatpants and dark green t-shirt. He always looks so perfect.

You flop on the couch and turn on the T.V.

"You wanna watch The Little Mermaid again, boo?" You turn around looking at him, seeing him raid the cabinets for snacks.

"Do you even have to ask me that?" He yells back when he finds his chips. You chuckle and start the movie.

"NO DON'T START IT YET I'M NOT READYYYY!"

"THEN GET YOUR SLOW ASS OVER HERE!" you yell back at him. His level of immaturity isn't even visible because of how high it is. It's unmatched.

After a few moments, he finds his way on the couch next to you with your double stuffed Oreos and apple juice, passing it to you. He had his veggie sticks cause he's so damn picky.

You both get comfortable and turn your attention to the movie.

After some time, it's the scene were Sebastian is encouraging Eric to kiss Ariel. You wish the real Sebastian would come over and convince Chris to be with you. Maybe he'd listen. Just the thought irritates you.

You huff lowly in annoyance. Chris notices but doesn't say anything. You always got frustrated at this part cause he took FOREVER to finally kiss her. So he brushes it off. Nothing he hadn't seen before.

While the movie was playing, you were getting even more frustrated in that moment. Chris had his arm behind your back and hand resting on your hip, laughing at Flounder. It was like he was playing a game with you that he didn't know he was even apart of. You shifted away from him a little. You hated feeling this way.

Little to your knowledge, Chris was watching you in the corner of his eye. He watched you as your mind raced and move constantly. Your eyes move around a lot when you think hard. He knew something was up.

"Jellybean, what's up?" You turn and look at him, pushing away the feeling the nickname presented you inside. He gave it to you after you bought him a Starburst jellybean gift basket to celebrate the end of you guys' filming.

"What do you mean? I'm fine" you lie right in his face. Like a complete idiot because he can see right through you. You turn back to watch the movie, but he grabs the remote and pauses it.

You roll your eyes, knowing very well he isn't letting this go. Why do you find yourself in these situations? You always end up fishing for trouble and you're not even using bait. It just comes to you. You scratch your head trying to come up with a way to dissolve the situation.

"When are you going to stop trying to lie to me, princess?" Another name he gave you. You prefer it over 'jellybean'. It made your body flutter even more. But at this point, you were tired of faking. Tired of covering up your feelings. Tired of being less than what you wanted to be to him.

Wasting no time, you take a deep breathe and spill.

"You know what Chris? I like you. There. I said it." You slap your hands down on your lap as you spoke.

"And I don't mean as a friend or as a fuck buddy. I've felt this way for a very long time. Even before we started having sex. I thought us doing this would make us closer, possibly forming a relationship."

You glance at him and continue when he doesn't say anything. He just looks at you.

"But it hasn't gone anywhere. I'm tired of faking my feelings towards you. I'm tired of coming over here acting like I just want sex when I want more. Way more."

By the time you finish, your head is down and your fingers are playing with the end of your dress. You cannot bring yourself to look up at him. You couldn't bear the rejection. All you hear are his quiet breaths. You fucked up.

Chris is a real talker. He could talk his ass off for hours into the next day. The fact that he isn't saying anything right now has you absolutely terrified, but ultimately embarrassed. You did this all for nothing.

"Y/N, I- I don't...uh" he stumbles over his words. That's all you needed to hear. You didn't need to bathe in it any longer.

You jump up off the couch, not forgetting to grab the cookies and juice, stick them in your bag and head over to your shoes. Chris is right on your tail calling you, trying to get you to stop.

"Hey princess wait" he calls behind you.

"Chris it's fine. I'm just gonna head home. I'm a little tired." Your soreness was the last of your worries, barely even feeling it anymore. You made an absolute fool of yourself and now you couldn't go back. It was a done deal.

"Come on, baby. I didn't mean to-"

"Chris!" You raise your voice at him. He shuts his mouth right away. Your shoes are on and keys in hand. "Its okay. I just don't feel good. I'll call you later. Tomorrow maybe."

You block out anything else he was saying and step out the door heading to your car. He didn't even try to stop you. He fucked up and it didn't need to get messier than it already was. He watched in guilt as you pull out his driveway and down the street.

You drive in complete silence. Normally, you'd be blasting Partition on the way after getting dicked down, but that was not the case. And it wouldn't be for a while.

Part 2 coming really soon 🤩!

#cevans #andy barber smut #chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #steve rogers smut #avengers #chris evans smut #chris evans fluff #captain america

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miss-smutty · 3 years

Text

The Destructive Secret

Chapter 3

A/N- The secrets out! Well to you guys anyway 🤫

Summary- You've got a secret to hide and it's going to cause complete and utter destruction. It's only so long until your lies are going to catch up to you.

Word count- 3,258

Warnings- Swearing, lies, deceit, cheating

Pairing- Chris Hemsworth X you / Liam Hemsworth X you

18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 25th May 2021

Taglist-: @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @mostly-marvel-musings

Chapter 1 + 2

"Morning babe, I tried to let you have a sleep in. I didn't wake you did I?" He asks, preoccupied with the washing up.

"No, I actually had a good sleep for once." You say nonchalantly while searching through the kitchen cupboards for a mug in a half asleep haze. "That's not going to last long when I have to spend the weekend in a hotel bed though."

Finally finding your favourite mug right at the back of the cupboard, you slam it on the counter a little more aggressively than you expected, startling you out of your daziness. Your boyfriend raises his eyebrow at you questioningly and you just shrug your shoulders back at him. It was definitely going to be one of them days, those days where nothing goes right. You would question what you'd done to deserve it but you already know the answer to that. You were just going to have to put up with karma kicking your ass at any given moment for the rest of your life.

"Aww I know babe, at least it's only two night's though." He comes up behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder and wrapping his arms around your waist. "You've just reminded me -" He presses carefully, the way he shifts his composure telling you he's uncomfortable with what he's about to say and your heart begins to beat a little faster. " - I know you're going away tomorrow and I really wanted to have the night alone..." He pauses again.

"Just tell me, what is it?" You ask, trying to keep the annoyance from your voice.

"My brother called this morning, he sounds in a bad way so I said he can come over and hang out tonight. You don't mind do you?" Now your heart stops beating completely, what the hell is he playing at?

"I'm worried about him, he's not been right lately and he's going away for work tomorrow night too so it's the only time I can see him really." You're angry with him for saying he's going away too, how more fucking obvious can he make it? You're just both suspiciously going to be away with work at the same time. You can't protest about it now, you don't want to raise any more questions.

"No of course not, babe." You agree reluctantly, still seething with anger on the inside. "Right, I'm going for a shower and then I better start packing." You sulk.

"Do you want some help?" He ask as you kiss him on his cheek while you're passing.

"It's ok babe, you know how meticulous I am with my packing." You say smiling softly at him.

"Gotcha, I am not getting involved with that. Give me a shout if you want a coffee."

"You're the best."

****************

Using the tap to muffle the sound of your voice while you make a call. This was starting to become a habit now, the sound of running water in the background whenever you speak to him, a memory that you will never forget. Whenever you run your bath or fill the sink you're going to be reminded of your lying and cheating. Great! Just another thing to add to the list of things to look forward to in the future.

You never thought you'd be a cheater, especially to someone you loved and cared for so deeply. You'd always despised people who cheated, could never understand how people could have multiple lives and cheat multiple times. Naively thinking that if they weren't happy they should just tell the person they are with and stop all the hurt but it doesn't always work that way. You didn't suddenly think 'hey I'm not happy, I'm going to go fuck someone else'. You certainly wouldn't have chosen his brother if that was the case. Over the years it just happened and you hated yourself for it. You weren't even unhappy in your relationship, so that throws all your theories of 'cheaters' completely out of the window. The sound of the dial tone snaps you from your thoughts.

"Hi babe." He answers almost immediately, leaving you with no time to regain your composure. "Hello?"

"Oh erm.... Don't 'hi babe' me." Not a great start, you have to admit.

"What's wrong?" You can tell that Chris is amused with your tone of voice and it makes that anger resurface.

"You know exactly what's wrong, why the fuck are you coming over here tonight?"

"Erm to s-" you don't even give him time to speak before you interrupt him. You don't believe that he's just coming to see Liam, you know he's coming to see you no matter what he says.

"As if it's not awkward enough without having you both in the same house together... You have to cancel." The thought of them both being together with you filled you with fear. How were you supposed to act around them both? The idea of it fills you with chills.

"I'm not cancelling. I haven't seen him in a while and he invited me. It'll be fine, I'll be on my best behaviour, I promise. I get you all to myself tomorrow anyway."

"Exactly so why do you need to come over here and make everything all awkward?"

"Babe I'm coming to see my brother, you get me to yourself tomorrow. Don't be selfish" you could hear the amusement in his voice, you're sure he enjoys this.

"Pfft." A huff is about the only thing you could manage right now.

"You get to have both your favourite people in the same room, at the same time... Hey maybe we can have a threesome?"

"Fuck off." You murmur, although you have to admit the thought of it does turn you on slightly. In a perfect world that would be the best possible outcome but it's not a perfect world and that most definitely would never happen.

"I'll see you tonight, wear something sexy." He laughs.

"This isn't funny." You reply before hanging up the phone and you're left alone with the tormenting sound of flowing water.

This is going to be a disaster, you can't help but think that tonight is the night it all comes out. Surely this isn't what he has planned, he wouldn't want to hurt his brother in such a viscous way. To announce at dinner that he's fucking his girlfriend and that they've been going behind his back and fucking for years. Surely not? You're pretty sure you're being paranoid but know you're going to be on the edge of your seat all night, frightened everytime he opens his mouth to speak.

**************

You're sure you've downed almost a full bottle of wine before he's even arrived, you try to remember how many glasses you've had when you finally hear the dreaded chime of the doorbell. Your head is dizzy with bubbles already, your stomach churning at the thought. It wasn't the cleverest of ideas to drink so much already, not when you need to be sharp and aware of what you're doing and saying. Fuck.

The way Chris' eyes light up when he sees you reminds you exactly why this is all worth it. You feel your nerves settle slightly now the first step was over and it wasn't so bad was it? You don't know what you were actually expecting, him to walk through the door and kiss you passionately sounds about right though.

"Chris! Hi, how you doing?" You act, standing on your tiptoes to hug him. It's so hard acting like he's your brother in law and not your... Boyfriend? Lover? You don't even know what to call him.

"Hi, beautiful." He whispers into your ear, making your stomach flip when you feel his lips graze against your neck. "I'm good thank you, how are you guys?" He says louder, moving away from your arms reluctantly and standing against the counter. The glint in his eyes and the smirk on his lips make him look sexy as hell, you bite onto your lip as hard as you can. Hoping to draw blood so you can concentrate on the pain and not the fact you want to rip your boyfriend's brothers clothes off.

"We're great" Liam replies.

"I'm sure you are." Chris says sarcastically under his breath, luckily Liam didn't hear him. You give Chris the glare, reminding him to be on his best behaviour.

"But how are you? You didn't sound too good the other day." Liam asks, opening a bottle of wine.

"I was probably just tired bro, you know how it is. I don't get much sleep nowadays."

"Oh yeah, is a woman involved by any chance?" Liam asks, laughing to himself.

"Yeah, something like that." Chris subtly grazes your hand as you walk into the kitchen to help Liam. You freeze on the spot, looking into his eyes you see a desperately pleading look. You know this is torture for him, that he just wants to grab you and hold onto you. Even though he tries his best not to, he hates his brother for it, he hates that he gets to have you.

"Anyway, it smells great in here. What you making?" Chris says locked in eye contact with you.

"I've just thrown together some dinner." You say casually, although deep down your heart is tugging and your hands are shaking.

"Her food is fucking amazing, I probably should have made sure you hadn't eaten first though?" Liam puts his arms around you and kisses your cheek as you carry on stirring the food on the stove. You're glad you have your back to Chris because you dread to think of his reaction. How you have to pretend you don't know each other on that deep level. You had tried to warn him that this was a bad idea.

"Yeah, no that would be awesome. Thanks" You can tell by the way his voice broke that this is causing him pain and there's nothing you can do about it.

**************

"Do you want a beer or are you ok with wine?" Liam asks Chris as you sit down at the table ready to eat.

"I'd love a beer bro" Chris replies. You watch from the corner of your eye as Liam heads to the fridge, your heart beating a little faster now he's out of sight. Looking to Chris nervously.

Chris takes the opportunity while Liams back is turned and grabs your hand under the table. Stroking your palm with his thumb he mouths the words 'love you'. You can't help but feel sorry for him, this horrible situation you're all in. You mouth the words back to him before he lets your hand go when Liam comes back into sight.

All the way through the meal Chris can't take his eyes off of you, you're worried Liam will notice but he's paying no attention. Obviously he has no reason to doubt his loyal girlfriend and protective big brother, why would he? Which makes your betrayal even more unbearable.

"This is great Y/N." Chris says after tasting your food and moving your dress a little higher so he can place his hand on the top of your bare thigh under the table. The shock makes you jump and you hit your knee on the top of the table.

"Are you alright?" Liam asks looking slightly confused.

"Sorry, yeah. I just burnt my mouth." There's a slight hint of amusement in your words, you're a bad person but the situation is just too much not to find it slightly funny. The feel of Chris' hand on your thigh makes you feel butterflies in your stomach at the same time as the deep sick feeling of dread, your mind in a giant conflicted turmoil of feelings.

You can see Chris is also trying to hide his laugh as he takes a sip from his beer, one hand still on your thigh. Why the fuck am I sat in the middle? You hadn't thought about it when you'd sat down but now realise it was a massive mistake and also subconsciously the perfect place for you. The playing piece in a match against brothers, only one player is unaware there is any contest at all.

Chris finishes his beer and puts it down on the table loudly, filling the awkward silence between you all. You can understand the awkwardness between you and Chris but why is Liam not speaking? He wanted to see Chris to figure out what was wrong with him but he's not asking any questions. Has he figured it out? Did he see Chris touch your hand earlier? Had he seen you both whispering? You wriggle in your chair, feeling deadly uncomfortable and hoping Chris would move his hand. He didn't take the hint.

"Do you want another?" Liam asks Chris, already getting up from his chair and not waiting for an answer. Something is definitely wrong. Chris's hand moves further up your thigh, grazing the lace of your panties with the tip of his long finger. He's also completely oblivious to your awkwardness, drinking too much is numbing his senses and becoming dangerous. He's playing with fire.

You fling your chair back from the table, standing abruptly, your cheeks flushed red with embarrassment and nervousness.

"I'm just gunna get some more beers from the basement." Liam announces, Chris sat cooly in his chair with not an ounce of nervousness.

"It's ok I'll go, you guys have a chat." You say, desperately needing to escape for a minute to catch your breath.

"Don't be silly, it'll only take me a minute." Liam says, already walking towards the door.

Chris takes his cue again, standing from his chair and moving over to you. Standing closely so he can whisper in your ear, his arm pressed to the small of your back while he holds you against him.

"I can't wait to have you in my bed again tomorrow Y/N. I've waited too long."

"Chris, shh."

"No, you shh. I wish I had you now, right here. I could just sit you up on this counter and fuck you right here -" He moves his hand up your skirt, gripping your ass in his big hands. "- You want that don't you? Tell me." His teeth graze the skin on your neck, making your head hang back loosely. You want it so bad, all your tension melts away as your muscles relax in his arms.

"We've got all weekend Chris, we can't do this here. It's too risky." You sigh, carefully wrapping your arms around his neck and listening for any sign of Liam.

"Fuck I know but it's so hard being here with you and not being able to fucking touch you." He moves away from you, running his hand though his hair in frustration.

"I told you how hard it'd be." You say.

"How hard what would be?" Liam asks breathlessly. Fuck. You hadn't heard him coming back, how much more had he heard?

You're lost for words, completely frozen in shock. If he hadn't heard or seen anything it was still way too close for your liking.

"To shoot this ball of foil into that bin from all the way over here." Chris replies hastily, you're incredibly impressed with his quick thinking.

"Let me have a go then." Liam says, taking the foil from Chris. Typical competive brothers. Chris turns to you and winks devilishly, you're perfectly aware of how desirable he looks but you try to push that thought aside. You can't be thinking about that, the things he had just been saying and the thrill of almost being caught, all at once.

"My turn." You say raising your eyebrows at them both as you swing your hips, confidently over to the fridge. Chris bites his lip as he watches you walk over. "Watch and learn boys." This is quite possibly the strangest situation you've ever been in but you might as well make the most of it.

You shoot your shot and land the foil ball straight into the bin. Turning around and bowing, you're wide eyed when you straighten back up. They both moved towards you as if they were going to kiss you, luckily Chris stopped himself in time.

"Only you could've landed that shot." Liam says, picking you up in his arms, leaving you with no choice but to wrap your legs around him while he kisses your lips deeply.

You risk a glance at Chris over Liam's shoulder and he's seething with anger, you can see it written all over his face.

"I'm gunna go outside for some air." Chris announces blankly while Liam sets you back on the ground, a look of concern on his face.

"You alright bro?" Liam asks with no reply from Chris as he walks out of the door.

You get on with the cleaning up, distracting yourself and hoping Liam hadn't noticed Chris' reaction. You can sense Liam behind you, stood on the spot thinking. He's working it out, he's putting together all the pieces and finally working it out.

"I've worked out what's wrong with Chris." He comes up behind you, emptying the plates into the trash. Fuck, here we go.

"What do you mean?" You ask gently, not really wanting to hear his conclusion.

"You know, the reason why he's been moping about all the time." You don't turn around, you just listen, hiding your face and any reaction you're showing. "Well he's quite obviously jealous of us." He adds. There we go, he's worked it out or he's definitely worked out Chris' part in it all.

You felt your stomach drop, Chris was so obvious it wouldn't take a genius to see something was wrong.

"What makes you say that?" You press, carefully. Your back still turned to Liam while you clean the surfaces.

"Don't tell me you didn't notice how he just acted when I kissed you." Of course you noticed, you just hoped Liam hadn't. It won't be long until he puts all the pieces together and figures this all out, if he hasn't already. You pour the last of the bottle of wine into your glass, gulping it greedily. Lord knows you're going to need it.

"He needs a girlfriend, can't you fix him up with one of your friends?" You can't describe the relief you feel right now and a small twang of jealousy at the thought of Chris with one of your friends.

"I'm sure your brother isn't short of admirers Liam, he doesn't need me to fix him up" Your tone of voice was a little too short. Pull it together.

"I suppose you're right but he doesn't have the best taste in women does he?" You can feel your cheeks burning, you're fighting the urge to defend yourself. Telling Liam his brother had the same taste in women when it came to you, wouldn't go down quite so well would it?

"I'm seeing someone actually Liam." Chris says, overhearing your conversation as he came back in after finally composing himself.

"Oh really? You never said." Liam asks curiously.

"Yeah, we're keeping it to ourselves for now... Until she tells her boyfriend." What the actual fuck? You can't believe he's just said that, he looks at you defiantly, completely over this whole thing.

Liam nearly spat his drink out and you're sure your cheeks are beetroot red, you don't have a clue what to do in this situation.

"Is she married? Do I know her?" Liam questions further. You're hoping and praying he stops with the questions, Chris is ready and willing to come clean, you can tell by his expression.

"No not married but you do know her. You know her really well actually." Chris says while avoiding your gaze purposefully...

#chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth smut #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x you #smut #angst #liam hemsworth #read this #thor #thor series #thor smut #fanfic #chris fanfiction #fanfiction

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kindnessisweakness · 3 years

Text

YOU WERE A BET -- Part 2!!

I had a lovely person message me and ask for a part 2 so here it is! Hope you enjoy!

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Tears burned behind my eyes as I tried to hold them in. Rushing around what was mine and Angels shared room I tried to pack 2 years worth of belongings into my suitcase. Quickly ripping my clothes from the hangers in the wardrobe, I could care less if they broke, I needed to get out of here. A small thud made me stop in my tracks. Turning to throw the clothes in my hands on to the bed I reached down to pick up the small box. I couldn't stop the sob that wracked through me as I opened the lid. Photos stared up at me, almost mocking me with their happy smiles. 2 years worth of momentos filled this box. Cinema tickets, concert passes and funfair wristbands littered the top of the red felt lining. She kept all of them as a keepsake. Memories were important. Something to remember her and Angels time together. This box used to make her smile fondly when she opened it. Made her fill with love and think how lucky she was to have a boyfriend like Angel. Now all it did was fill her heart with pain and her eyes with tears. How could it have all been fake? How could he do this to her? Everyone told her she was foolish for believing he would want her. She felt foolish now. Embarrassed even. She let her heart rule her head. Let Angel fill it with hope and sweet nothing's. And here she was left holding the baby, just like her mother said she would be. Pulling a photo from the box she couldn't help the faint smile that spread over her lips. It was one of her favourite memories of their relationship. Bonfire night at the clubhouse. The first one Angel convinced her to attend. She could hear his voice now. "Come on, Mi Dulce. You'll love it." Glancing at there shared bed she remembered just how easy it was for him to convince her. To make her weak and pull her under. He was right, she did love it. Wrapped in a blanket sat in Angels lap, mug of hot coco warming her hands has they laughed watching coco and Gilly argue over who was going to set the first firework off. EZ Worriedly shouting about safety precautions as they fought over the lighter. That was the first time Angel told her he loved her, surrounded by the club and family as the fireworks went off. Letty captured the meaningful moment of them kissing as blue and green fireworks exploded in the background. And to think, all that happiness was a lie. It's all over.

Angel quickly paced back and forth in front of the clubhouse bar. "What am I gonna do?" Ez shook his head as he looked at his brother in disgust. "I knew you were fucked up, but not this bad". Angel sneered at him "Sorry Ezekeiel not all of us can be the favourite. You don't know what it's like to always be second choice. To have nobody be proud of you-" Ez cut him off fire in his eyes as he slammed Angel back in to the bar, Y/Ns cake falling to the floor. "You fucking had that! Y/N always chose you! You fucked up and threw away the best thing that ever happened to you! Stop the self pity and grow the fuck up Angel. All this shit about me being mom and dad's favourite, you can't keep using it as an excuse to justify your shitty behaviour". Bending down Ez picked up the scan photo that lay on the floor among the crushed chocolate cake. Handing the photo to Angel he looked sadly at his brother. "You're gonna be a good dad Angel, a family of your own is all you've ever wanted. Go and grovel and get your girl back. You can fix this." Smiling at his brother Angel held the scan photo tight and headed towards the door. Felipe's voice made Angel Pause. "Don't fuck it up Angel. You'll regret it for the rest of your life"

Pulling the zip of the suitcase shut I tried to lift it from the bed. After a few minutes of struggling I managed to get the case on the floor. Quickly pulling the uncomfortable dress off i changed into a pair of grey sweats and a baggy hoodie. I had a long drive ahead of me and needed to be comfy. Placing the memory box on the bed I grabbed the suitcase and headed for the door. Pulling it closed behind me I headed towards my car. My heart felt heavy. I remember when Angel asked me to move in. He was so nervous it was adorable.

{Flashback}

Laying on my side I sighed as I watched Angel sleep peacefully. I hated when I stayed over when I had work the next morning. I had to get up 2 hours earlier so I could drive home shower and pick up my work things. Groaning quietly I pulled myself from the warm bed, grabbing my clothes from the floor. A squeal left my lips in Suprise as a hand shot out pulling me back on the bed. Laughter left my lips as Angels form appeared above me. He looked so good, even when he's just woken up. How is that possible? I'm pretty sure I look like a homeless woman right now. "Don't go baby. Stay in bed with me. Call in sick" he begged as he pressed kisses to my neck. "As tempting as that is I have to go home to get ready for work." Sighing he lay back on the bed as he watched me get ready to leave in silence. "Will I see you tonight? Your gonna stay over again yeah?" He broke the silence. I shook my head disappointed. " No sorry baby I have a meeting to prep for tomorrow. Plus I have an even earlier start so id have to leave early hours of the morning so I could go home and get ready." Angel fell silent again as I packed my overnight bag back up. I could feel him watching me as I moved around the room. Zipping the bag closed I turned to Angel. Leaning over him I placed a kiss on his forehead "bye baby I'll see you in a couple of days". Angel wrapped his arms around me tightly. "Stay. Move in with me." Pulling back to look him in the eyes I was suprised. "Seriously?" Smiling wide Angel nodded. "I want you here with me baby. All the time. I hate it when you leave and I have to come home to an empty bed. I hate going days without seeing you. Please baby. I want nothing more than to have you live with me. I want to come home to you every day." Nervousness crossed his face as I stayed silent. "Y-you don't have to decide n-now. I-i-it was j-just an idea. F-forget I said anythi-" I've never seen angel so worried before. I cut him off a smile spreading over my lips. "Ofcourse baby. I'd love to take that next step with you!" Grinning Angel opened his bedside draw. "I already got you a key cut" his cheeks tinged pink as I giggled.

The sound of an engine cut the happy memory short. Unlocking my car I opened the boot just as Angel pulled into the driveway. My chest constricted painfully as I made eye contact with him. God, i dread to think what I look like from all the crying. "Wait Y/N don't leave! Talk to me!" Scoffing as I tried to lift the heavy suitcase into the boot of my car. The heavy bag fell to the floor as I failed. Angel was quick to grab the handle of the case, stopping me from leaving. "Talk to you? Why would I want to talk to you? You and me are done Angel. You won your bet. Games over!" Shaking his head Angel broke down. " No, No you have to listen! Yes it all started as a bet. But I love you! You have to believe me. You were always too good for me. Youre fucking amazing and so smart. I was fucking terrified to admit I liked you. Coco and Gilly could see through me. That's why they bet me, they knew I hate to turn down a challenge. Fuck I've never looked at another girl twice since I took you on that first date. Ask Vikki I've not been anywhere near her house of whores since we got together. You're it for me Y/N" his eyes were rimmed red from all the crying and Y/Ns heart broke seeing him like this. "Don't leave me. please. Your the best thing that ever happened to me" pulling the scan photo from his pocket he have Y/N a teary smile. "And this is the second best thing. You're my world Y/N. I want nothing more than to be a family. I'll spend the rest of my life making up for this. Just give me a chance." Angel was all but on his knees begging. "This isn't how I expected this reveal party to go. I feel like everything has been a lie. How do I know this isn't another game? How do I know your telling the truth?" Shaking her head y/N rubbed the falling tears from her cheeks . "I think it's best if we give eachother some space. I'll be in touch about doctors appointments and checkups. I won't keep you from your child Angel." Lifting her case into the boot successfully this time y/N made her way to the drivers side. With one Last look towards a broken Angel she climbed in and drove away. Angel sobbed like a child as he watched the love of his life and unborn child drive away. With one Last look towards the dark sky Angel did the one thing be hasn't done in years. Putting his hands together he fell to his knees.

"Please mum. I need to make it right. Give me another opportunity to hold her and I'll never mess it up again" Angel prayed hard to his mum for forgiveness, guidance and hope for his little family to be together again.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Well guys there it is! I have an idea for part 3! Let me know what you think. Hope you liked it!

#angel reyes x reader #fanfiction #mayans mc imagine #angel reyes #mayans imagine

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4aloysius-porteu · 3 years

Text

Tear In My Heart

pairing: kirishima eijirou x vigilante reader

wc: 1908

genre: songfic, angst, fluff

warnings: mentions of blood/injuries

tear in my heart - twenty one pilots

Kirishima

It was nighttime when I was ordered to guard in Hosu City, in patrol of villains making crimes around. Yes, I'm a certified hero now and I just finished taking down a criminal with a laser quirk, and I'm on the way to my agency to turn over him.

"That's Red Riot for you!" Tetsutetsu greeted me while the police restrained the criminal. We did their usual brofist, "You alright, bro?"

"Why woudn't I be? I'll stay here for the whole night to catch and drive the villains away."

"Anyway, Fourth Kind said you can go home now. The others and I will take over here. Get a rest, man! See you tomorrow!"

"Oh, yeah, see you!" He patted my shoulder as I left to change clothes.

Sometimes you gotta bleed to know That you're alive and have a soul

I finished changing, then I got outside and saw my friends.

"Hey, Kirishimaaaa!" Ashido and Kaminari loudly greeted.

"Hey guys! You finished in your shift? Where's Sero and Bakugou?" I asked.

"Yep! They're on the morning shift now so we won't we seeing them in this month," Ashido replied.

"Dude, your Hero name is so famous around these areas! You sure are close with people after you rescue them, I'm envious!" Kaminari said.

"Don't be, Kaminari. Maybe someday you'll get known too."

"I hope so."

But it takes someone to come around, To show you how

After a litte chitchat they bid a goodbye and I got inside my car and drove it in a moderate speed. When I stopped in the red light, I remembered something important. I haven't texted hy girlfriend for the whole time!

She's the tear in my heart, I'm alive She's the tear in my heart, I'm on fire

Crap, I hope she's not mad at me!

I grabbed my phone and my fingers typed quickly, apologizing for not talking with her. She didn't reply, which made me more worried. I sighed and continued driving.

She's the tear in my heart, Take me higher, than I've ever been

Few minutes later, I still didn't get a reply. Maybe she's really angry, so I made my way to her apartment. While driving, I smiled when I suddenly remembered the first time we met. It was a year ago, in my first hero job.

A car accidentally crashed on her while she was crossing a road, severely injuring her leg. I was on the patrol so I rushed to rescue her. I took her to the hospital and visited her everyday till she gained conciousness. And when she did, God knows how I was caught in her beauty.

The songs on the radio are okay But my taste in music is your face

Since her parents were already gone and her older brother was working overseas, I was the one who took care of her, other than the hospital nurse. We soon got closer and talked with deeper topics, like our chilhood, families, and random experiences. It was really fun to be with her.

When she got better and was able to get out of the hospital, we exchanged numbers, and texted almost every hour.

But it takes a song to come around, To show you how

I also took her on a lot of dates, before we admitted our feelings to each other and her and I became 'we'.

I was taken back to the reality by my phone beeping. At last, she replied! Although, her text is just composed of a location that was 2 blocks away from me. I decided to go since I trust her and I think she's already there.

She's the tear in my heart, I'm alive

I drove on the way but all I found was a dark alley. It was very quiet and shady, why would my girlfriend lead me here? I walked inside, but I came up with my fighting stance in case something bad happens.

"Hello? (Y/N)? Are you here?" I called.

She's the tear in my heart, I'm on fire

No response. I continued to walked, until a figure showed up above me. I fought to restrain it, but I feel like its fighting back so desperately, so I decided to back off a bit and let it pin me on the ground.

She's the tear in my heart, Take me higher, than I've ever been

It was panting hard, but still managed to restrain my wrists. I looked at its face, and when the light of the moon showed up, I instantly recognized her face.

Than I've ever been...

"K-Kirishima?" She weakly said.

"(Y/N)!" She let go of my wrists as I got up and held her in my arms, "Are you okay? Hey!"

Than I've ever been...

"I think I'm alright... but I'm glad you came."

"What happened?"

Than I've ever been...

"K-Kirishima... I'm tired. I-I can tell you when we get to your place..."

I quickly carried her to my car and laid her down for her to rest. Now, I noticed that she has wounds and bruises on her arms, and her stomach has a blood stain. I have a hunch on what happened, but I'll ask it to her later.

You fell asleep in my car, I drove the whole time But that's okay I'll just avoid the holes So you'll sleep fine

I started to drive, but the road holes makes it hard to drive properly. (Y/N) might wake up because of my recklessness, so I decided to drive slowly.

I'm driving here I sit, Cursing my government For not using my taxes To fill the holes with more cement

I observed her sleeping figure at peace before taking my focus on the road. There's a lot of road holes, I wondered where it came from, since its still fine when I passed here. Maybe its the villians' or hero's battle fault.

You fell asleep in my car, I drove the whole time But that's okay I'll just avoid the holes So you'll sleep fine

I'm driving here I sit, Cursing my government For not using my taxes To fill the holes with more cement

When I reached my house, I parked my car in my garage and carried her out of the car then inside. I laid her on the bed and get a medical kit to treat her wounds. It wasn't too deep or serious, but its many. I raised her shirt, but first I promised not to do inappropriate things, and proceeded on treating on a medium sized cut on her stomach.

Sometimes you gotta need to know That you're alive and have a soul

I covered her wounds and cuts with a clean gauze and band aids, and that's when she woke up.

"Oh, sorry to wake you up, (Y/N). You can go to sleep now. I treated your wounds now, don't worry."

I was about to stand up and get her a blanket, but she pulled me back and hugged me from behind.

But it takes someone to come around, To show you how

"(Y/N)? Is there something wrong?"

She muttered, "Stay..."

I did what she said and sat beside the bed. I sighed and asked her again.

"You're still continuing your vigilante activities, aren't you?"

She's the tear in my heart, I'm alive She's the tear in my heart, I'm on fire

"Yes."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Yes."

She's the tear in my heart, Take me higher, than I've ever been

"I'm sorry for not texting you for the whole day, but (Y/N), I told you to stay out of danger! We've been through a lot of arguments here! First off, there are strong villains scattered everywhere, and second, you don't have a Hero License, so the authorities can arrest you when they caught you! You're between the two parties, and when you mess up, none of those sides will help and rescue you!"

A sound of a slap echoed through the room.

My heart, is my armor She's the tear in my heart

She replied, sobbing, "So are you underestimating me? Do you not believe and trust my abilities? And what do you mean that none of those two sides will help? You are on the heroes' side aren't you? Won't you come and rescue me if I'm about to get killed? Will you forget me for your commitment in the Heroes' society? God damn it, Eijirou! I'm being a hero in my own way because the society rejected my ideology and ability!"

She let go of me and cried. I felt bad for making her cry, but I just had to tell those things.

"I thought you understand me, Eijirou, but now I felt that you're just the same as the others! I hate you, Eijirou! I really hate you!"

She's a carver, She's a butcher with a smile

I moved to reach her but she slapped my hand away. That didn't stop me though, I still hugged her, even if she's struggling against my grip.

"Let go of me, Eijirou! I'm leaving now!"

Cut me farther, Than I've ever been

She beat my chest multiple times, but I refused to loosen my embrace. I held her tight and forced her against my chest, trying to stop her from moving.

"I'll never let go of you, (Y/N). You know that well."

Than I've ever been...

She ceased, but she gripped the sleeves of my shirt, tugging it and continued crying in it. I patted her hair and back.

"I just said those things because... I was worried. I don't want you getting hurt. I'm sorry for being hard on your feelings, (Y/N). I'm really sorry."

Than I've ever been...

"I-I was worried too. You didn't message me for the whole day. That wasn't your habit, so I went out to find you but I messed with some villains who was breaking in the bank in my way." She managed to say between sobs.

Oh, than I've ever been...

I kissed her forehead, "I'm glad you're safe."

"But Eijirou... about earlier. Aren't you going to come to me when you're stuck in your hero work and I'm in terrible danger? Please, answer me honestly."

My heart, is my armor She's the tear in my heart

"Of course not. I promise with all my heart that you'll be my first priority. I know I'm the only one, and once I'm not around you anymore, promise me to take care of yourself, okay?"

You turned away, "Don't say that. It scares me."

"Just do it."

"I promise not to make a fuss and take care of myself when Kirishima Eijirou is not around anymore."

She's the tear in my heart, She's a carver

"I hope that time won't come." She mumbled.

I held a stray strand of her hair and tucked it beside her ear, then placed my hand on her cheek, "You're so beautiful, (Y/N). I can never think of losing you."

She's a butcher with a smile, Cut me farther,

"I love you, (Y/N)."

"I love you too, Eijirou."

Than I've ever been.

I leaned in and gave her the most passionate kiss I can give, and at that time, I feel very happy and secured with her. I could tell she feels the same because tears stopped flowing from her eyes.

Loving makes you feel alive, after all.

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justrandomselfships · 3 years

Text

Little steps- my self insert Fic (S/I POV) with a bunch of silly illustrations! Oh did I mention that this involves Kaeya? Well he's the main focus here even though Lisa is mentioned shit ton of times! Might write something for her focus too someday.

I finished it ages ago but I was afraid to post it- I'm not anymore and also✨ it's my birthday ✨

Ever since I joined the knights I decided to write in a diary, it helped me keep track of time. Lisa told me that it can help me in various ways, like for example remembering names of the other knights, or checking my personal progress. Now that I think about it, it was long since I checked my old entries. Nothing interesting happened today anyway so I might as well read some. I don't really remember anything that was going on when I started so I suppose I could refresh my memory.

Today Lisa wanted to introduce me to someone- she probably wanted to help me by looking for training partner for me, however I had to refuse. You probably remember why was that, I got scared of meeting someone new again. I couldn't get that mess on her shoulders when she has so much to do as it is! And there was no way I'd meet them alone it'd be too akward for both of us!

I remember the exact moment I tried to come up with an excuse for future me... It kinda made me giggle how stupid I am sometimes, but let's look at something else...

I've never felt as lonely as I do now, I don’t even know why. I don’t miss anyone nor I ever craved any interactions... But to make that feeling go away I thought about talking to Amber but when I left the house she was talking to Noelle and I got scared to approach them... Instead I decided to sketch something and stay inside for the rest of the day.

I immediately looked at my sketchbook, I don't even have to look inside, I was drawing what's outside my window like always. Maybe I'll find some better memory if I keep looking?

During my patrol I got a bit lost... It was scary... But I wasn't alone, an Adventurer found me... However he got lost too. It was a bit unlucky day since I picked the wrong maps, we also got attacked a few times by monsters. I kinda feel bad for him since he tried his best to cheer me up but I stayed silent. It should've been other way around a knight shouldn't le

Bennett! How could I forget his name when I was writing this? He was such a sweetheart I obviously had to mess it up and make him feel uncomfortable... But I did make up for it! Maybe I'll finally read something positive? I somehow can't remember how exactly that went... Or if I was daydreaming about apologizing?

I decided to bake something for Bennett as thank you and apology for acting so cold towards him. But I had no idea on how to find him... Or what to say... So after thinking for few minutes I decided to talk to Katherine and ask her to give it to him. After "talking" to her I locked myself in my room out of embarrassment, I messed up again. I just said "Bennett" placed my pastries and left. Now I probably won't be able to face her for at LEAST two months.

I cringe at the memory... Gosh now this will keep me up at night for sure... I finally forgot about it and now it'll haunt me.

Wait a second... Did I really not made any progress at all!? I was trying so hard to socialize with others and get out more but I seem to still not be able to do it right. No, it's impossible. I'm good friends with Lisa! So I definitely made any progress... Or is she just so easy to talk to? Time to take a final look at something recent for a change...

Capitan Kaeya Alberich wanted to talk to me outside work... It might not sound like a big deal but somehow I just froze... I wasn't able to respond properly and he probably guessed what I was going to say, not that he ever can't do that... I might be too predictable. Either way I feel bad, my behavior was really disrespectful and I knew better than that to just ignore someone like him. I still have much to learn and I'll need to properly apologize for staying silent.

I only ever failed... There is no mistaking it. Great way to note down progress huh? Too bad there is none.

Think, what do I need to do to finally do better? I am the problem for sure but what do I really need to change? Maybe I should just start observing how others act... After all I never bothered to do that. It might help in one way or another...

Obviously there's only one place where there is a lot of people and I won't look like a total creep if I'll just listen in the conversations and look at random people... It's no other than the tavern. I'm scared to go there alone... But I don't have to!

Lisa would be willing to go right?... Then again I rely on her a bit too much and going out like this could be an opportunity to break the ice with someone else...

Jean is always busy, Amber will be way too distracting and we might end up somewhere else, Eula is too scary, Venti... I don't even know why I'm considering him.

Maybe that offer from capitan Kaeya still stands? It's from bearly 2 weeks ago so maybe if I get lucky and he happens to still be interested, I can actually go...

What am I even thinking!? I didn't even apologize for the last time... But being around so many drunk people is terrifying... However I can't bet on the fact that he won't drink too much... On the other hand he seems to handle people and I'll definitely learn something.

Screw it. It might be scary but I need to do it. Tomorrow I'll ask him! That's for sure! He's the most respectable and trustworthy person who isn't always busy and will not distract me.

~⏳

I'm scared to do it but I have to! I need to... Did I really say that I'm gonna do it today? Or should I just pretend that I never thought of it. He's probably busy today. Yup definitely that no need to feel stressed.

I haven't seen him back at the headquarters nor did I see him around town when I was coming back from my patrol- that's a good sign. It's still pretty early but I don't think that I'll see him today... What a relief!

Before I left the headquarters after finishing some paperwork I hear a voice that belongs to a beautiful librarian I am lucky to be able to call a friend.

"Hey there cutie, are you okay?"

"Just a little bit nervous that's all, nothing new haha"

"Do you need me to pass a message again?"

"No need! It's something I need to say myself..."

"I see..."

"But if you happen to see capitan Kaeya it would be nice if you could tell him that I was looking for him" out of habit I grab my hair and begin to play with it. Lisa's warm soothing voice blessed my ears as she said "No worries darling, I'll let him know" before she left and giggled to herself...

Wait... Oh no.

Why did I say anything!? Is she that magical that I can't say anything but what's on my mind.

If she happens to meet him my request will be unavoidable! Even if I tried thinking of something else Kaeya will know that I'm lying. I can't avoid him either... Can't waste his precious time...

How do I even ask him!? Do I need to change from my work clothes before I go? What should I do...

I didn't realize that I started walking in circles before someone approached me.

"Heather?"

I turn around and see the man I was thinking about all day. Dammit... I have to say it. I can't think of an excuse and staying silent is now unacceptable.

"Oh-uhm... Greetings Capitan Kaeya"

"Lisa informed me that you were looking for me"

"Oh right!... That... Haha..."

"I don't want to rush you, however I do have some business to attend to"

"I'm so sorry! I mean- since you're busy then my silly request is irrelevant"

"Come now, I believe that I should be the judge of that" his smug look made it ever so slightly more challenging to say anything.

"I just... Ugh..." I took a deep breath "Look as you know I was trying to loosen up recently and well I realized that I wasn't making any progress at all. So I remembered that one time you asked me to go to the tavern with you and I refused... I mean ignored you, which I am VERY sorry about but now I think that it was a mistake and today I wanted to ask you to accompany me but since you're busy let's just forget about everything" I felt relieved getting that off my chest.

"I don't think that will do, in fact I was heading towards the tavern so if you really want to I suppose you can join me" Oh right... I forgot about him gathering some information there from time to time. So it might work after all! He won't pay too much attention to me and I could investigate without tons of distractions.

"Let's get going then capitan" I say before he smiles softly in response "Wait do you want to get going now or-"

"Yes" he cut me off, which was fair and I'm glad he did it before I said something dumb.

We're almost there. Before we get closer I suddenly stop.

"That reminds me!" I realized I spoke out loud, as he looked at my direction my confidence dropped dead "I've never actually tried any alcohol so would you be so kind to recommend something for me? I figured that since I'm already getting out of my comfort zone might as well try something new" I said under my breath but he definitely understood what I meant judging by his facial expression and well... response.

"Absolutely" my heart skipped a beat. I desperately tried to start a conversation topic... But choosing alcohol might be something I'll regret...

Kaeya started listing few drinks I could enjoy his words were poetic as he described the beverages, however the names of the drinks went over my head. It wasn't that bad but I just felt stupid over how clueless I was. He definitely knew what he was talking about and I'm more than interested in hearing more. The more he talks the less likely I am to say something I'll regret.

"Obviously since I don't know how much you can handle I won't be forcing you to try too much too soon" he paused "Your father probably wouldn't be happy either if you returned drunk" he said teasingly. It invited me to respond less seriously.

"Oh no! This means that we'll have to do it again, how awful"

"We didn't enter yet so you can feel free to leave now before you regret spending time with me of all people" his voice was now suddenly much more hostile... Did I mess it up!?

He laughed softly "I'm sorry did I go too far? While I don't want to force you to do anything, I won't lie... I'm a bit curious to learn something new about you tonight"

We were still outside standing right in front of the entrance to the tavern if not for chatting we could hear from the inside there would be total silence.

"I'm sorry for being quiet again! It's just that you caught me off guard haha" I look away "There isn't much to know about me so I feel like I'll only disappoint you"

"I'm not so sure about that part"

"Wait... Did my father tell you anything about me!?"

"Look let's just get inside, We'll discuss it later"

Nervously I followed him yet again. The atmosphere was warm and I could see different kinds of people all over the place. We sit down.

"So did he tell you anything?" I ask immediately.

"Relax, he didn't" he seemed amused by my desperation to know. It's understandable... And I'm probably overreacting anyway. I collect my thoughts "I'm sorry"

"What are you sorry for?"

"I'm just making this into some big deal for no reason. Maybe the reason is the huge amount of respect I have for you that makes me freak out"

"I see, well I don't see the reason to be so formal now. We aren't working after all" his soft smile was enough for me to calm down.

"Thank you" Maybe it was all I needed to hear, after that everything went smoothly.

I start feeling proud of myself... Maybe I can change after all? Either way it only shows that I have to write it down! And once I was back home I did just that.

Today I had enough courage to take a step in right direction! I went to a tavern with capitan Kaeya. It was fun and for the first time in years I wasn't that scared. It wasn't totally perfect but it was definitely worth it.

#❄️ frozen in tide 🌊#selfship #self insert #oc x cannon #self ship #my self insert #self shipping #my f/o #kinda self ship related #my self ship #kaeya x oc

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toomanyfandoms02 · 4 years

Text

Family Reunion // Luke Alvez x Reader

Blurb request for @hotchocolateandpillowforts but turned into a long one.

Summary - Reader is so tired of her family patronizing her for not having a boyfriend. So she begs her best friend Luke Alvez to fake date her for a day at her family reunion.

Word Count - 2.6k

Prompt - "These heels are peeling off my **skin**. But yes, keep complaing about your tie you whine ass."

Luke and I did everything together, this included shopping, like we were doing right now.

"What do you need a dress for anyway? Don't you have enough dresses." Lyke commented, sitting out in the sitting area of the changing rooms.

"I have a family reunion tomorrow, and since we always go to my rich aunts lake house, I have to have something extra nice. I would look dumb if I wore the same dress." My voice bounced back at me in the small fitting room. I cringed at the sound of it.

"Is it like some chardonnay party?" He questioned.

"Is that even a thing?" I stepped out, adjusting the dress in the full size mirror.

"It looks great on you." Luke pointed to the flowery and poofy dress.

"I would agree, if I was going to prom." I sighed. "But alas, my teen days are over." I made a fake swoon, causing him to laugh. "I have one more to try on, and if it doesn't work out, I'm not going." I stated, dramatically walking back into the small space. I began to slip on the last dress.

This dress was a light tan color. It was short and poofed out towards the bottom. Dark blue embroidered flowers bloomed every which way starting at the middle. I waltzed out again, not having to adjust anything on the mirror this time.

"Now *that* one is smokin'." Luke looked me up and down, causing my cheeks to heat up and an undeniable smile to appear on my face. Just as he said that, a younger girl, I would assume a teen, came from the room adjacent to mine.

"You guys are such a cute couple!" She gushed. "I need to find me a man who compliments like you do." She said, pointing to Luke.

"We actually-" we said at the same time.

"We aren't-" We were now pointing at eachother decoded to give in.

"Thank you!" I smiled at her, smoothing the dress down.

"Of course!" She left the area with a few dresses in hand, leaving us alone.

"I don't want to go to this party anyway." I let out a groan, remembering my hardass family.

"Why not? Don't like your family or something?"

"They are always passive aggressively calling me a prude for not having a boyfriend. They think I'm incapable of holding a relationship and constantly patronize me for it. It's complete bullshit!" I threw my hands in the air in frustration. "Now the worst part is, I've been lying and telling my mom that I have a boyfriend for like 2 months now. I figured 'how hard could it be to fund a temporary boyfriend in two months?' Prettt damn hard for me apperantly." I vented, now sitting next to him on the small leather couch.

"How about I help you out. I'll be your fake boyfriend for your little reunion." I looke dup at him with what I could only assume was puppy dog eyes.

"You would do that for me?" I was silently cursing myself for how desperate I was sounding. But I really needed this to be completely honest.

"Yeah of course!" His hand sat between my shoulder blades. "I have one question though. This isn't a dealbreaker, but I really want it."

"Oh no." I chucked.

"Would I be able to bring Roxy? Lately she's been having separation anxiety." This wa absolutely perfect.

"Actually that is probably doable. My whole family brings their dogs to these things. My aunt may be rich and kind of a snob, but *boy* does she love dogs. I'll text her right now." I pulled my phone out, feeling excitement bubble up inside me. Finally, my family will shut the hell up about my relationship life, and it was going ti feel so good.

Even if it was fake.

*Hey Auntie! I'm bringing my boyfriend tomorrow and he wanted to know if he could bring his dog? Shes a well trained German Shepard, Roxy.* I eagerly awaited a reply, surprised to see her immediate text back.

**You're bringing a boyfriend this year! Hell, he could bring an elephant and I wouldn't say no to a boyfriend! Absolutely. Bring 10 dogs!** I could feel her enthusiasm through the phone, she was a very excitable lady.

"Alright, Roxy is all clear for entry. And if you have 9 more dogs on hand, you can bring those too... Apperantly." I shook my head ta my phone. Luke looked at me quizzically and I shook him off too. "Okay first of all, I'm buying this dress." I stood swiftly, gesturing to the beautiful piece of clothing. "Second of all, after we check out, I need to tell you about my family so you don't walk into the line of fire blindly!" I changed from the dress into my regular shirt and pants again. I slung it over my arm and headed back out to Luke.

I paid for my dress, heading out to his car.

"So, first things first, auntie Jess, the womans house we are going to, has been waiting for me to have a boyfriend for quite a while now." He nodded with an amused smile. "My mom can be a little overbearing, but I'm sure she will love you so don't stress. Bring a bathing suit with you just in case my family so graciously suggests that we play a giant game of Marco Polo. I think that's it!"

"I'm honestly excited." He rubbed his hands together mischievously. "What should I wear?"

"Kind of specific, but can you just wear a white button up with rolled sleeves, a blue tie to match my dress. I know you have one. And just some slacks. Don't forget to wear your swim trunks under it though!"

"I dig these specifics. I'm gonna live *completely* up to your fantasy." He winked. I rolled my eyes at the silly man.

"Thanks Luke. You're sure you're okay with acting like my boyfriend? We have to be all lovey, and believable." His hand was placed on my shoulder.

"Of course, anything to get your family off your back. I get it." I'm so thankful for this man.

I fluffed my dress at the end, twirling around in the mirror. My hair was tied up in a simple ponytail that continued to bounce as I spun around the room. I didn't bother putting on any makeup because I knew we would be swimming today. I ran down the stairs at the sound of a knock on my door.

The other side showed Luke. He was pulling at his rolled sleeves to perfect them. He came looking just as ai imagined, we were truly going to look like a power couple.

"Alright, let's go." He looped his arm through mine and led us to his car. He opened the passenger door for me once we got there.

"Keep acting like such a gentleman and my moms probably gonna like you more than I do." I snickered as he started the car.

"I'm just playing the part!" He grinned. I turned to the back of the car, petting Roxys head as she panted.

"Are you excited to see other dogs prettt girl!" She made a soft bark in response. I I forward and kissed her snout, then sitting properly and buckling up.

It was a short drive from my house to the lake house, once we got there we sat for a minute.

"I'm a little nervous." Luke confessed, facing me with a concerned look.

"I would comfort you, but I'm nervous too." I patted his arm and exited the vehicle, looking back to see Luke giving me an 'unbelievable' look. My hand pulled open the back door to let Roxy out.

"Roxy come." I pointed to my side. She lightly hopped out and placed herself beside me. As Luke came from the other side of the car, he held his hand out to me. I grabbed it and headed into the house.

"Should we bring Roxy with?" He asked.

"Absolutely."

Right as we came in the door, my auntie saw us.

"Hi sweetie! How are you?" She peered down at our joined hands.

"I'm good. This is Luke." I looked over at him, he was giving a charming smile.

"You must be the man she keeps talling about!" She was practically bouncing with excitement at the mention of me having a boyfriend. She was quick to crouch down to a lower level. "And you must be Roxy!" She was using her typical baby voice. Roxy sat quietly by Luke's side. "You are quite obedient."

"She's a trained military dog." He commented, petting her ears.

"How cool!" Jess stood from her previous position and began walking farther into the house. "Come meet the rest if the family Luke."

We were dragged into the livingrook as he gave me a worried look. Before I could comfort him slightly, we were already standing in front of my family. I started introducing everyone.

"That's my mom, uncle Jeff, my brother Mike, and my cousin Nick. These are the only people I will know here." I laughed, pointing to the large amount of people that were outside. "I will not know anyone outside. So we will be experiencing the same thing." This earned a chuckle from everyone.

"It's nice to finally meet you Luke." My mom came up and hugged him. He accepted and hugged back tightly. Everyone else just sat and waved and I could feel an awkward silence coming on so I interjected.

"Luke and I are gonna head outside with Roxy so she can meet the other dogs." I rushed us out the door and huffed. "I don't know if I can do this." A sigh slipped from my lips.

"What do you mean? Did I do something wrong?" He looked like a sad puppy, one that had just chewed up a pillow.

"No! No, I don't know, I feel bad that you have to lie."

"I really don't mind, I promise hermosa." He used the Spanish word for me a few times. *Beautiful*.

His hand grabbed mine and dragged us into the yard.

"Let's get Roxy to meet some new pups." As we entered the yard, I could see 2 dalmatians, 1 chihuahua, 1 pitbull, 2 Rottweilers , and a Husky. Roxy calmly walked to the other dogs, soon prancing around them. I looked over at Luke to see him pulling at his tie.

"This tie is tight."

"These heels are peeling off my **skin**. But yes, keep complaing about your tie you whine ass." I giggled, reaching up and loosening it for him. Time to go into a swarm of people I don't recognize.

I guess I was wrong, I *did* recognize some of these people. One of which was my distant great aunt who was a little nosy but meant well. We had all been talking for a few minutes before she dropped a question that Luke and I had not prepared for.

"How did you two meet?" My face paled, I sure as hell was not going to tell her the truth, which was that we met on a crime scene when my college roommate was murdered. I squeezed his hand, signaling that I would answer this. I'm going to have to wing it.

"I was dog sitting actually. When I was taking the girls dog for a walk, I stumbled upon a dog park and she got really excited. She ran straight into Roxy." I pointed to the happy German Shepard who was laying in the grass next to the other dogs. "They tumbled over eachother and I came over to apologize to him, and her."

"I saw her and I thought, 'wow, beautiful and a dog lover? Sounds like an angel to me.'" He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer, kissing my forehead.

"How sweet!" She squealed. "I'm so happy for you dear. He's a keeper." She whispered loudly to me, walking towards her husband now. I elbowed his arm and gave him a playful smile.

"Well aren't you a master improviser!"

"*And* I'm a keeper." He teased, pulling me towards Roxy. Then we heard shouting.

"Alright everyone! If youbroght your swimsuits you are legally obligated to do the annual giant game of Marco Polo!" My mom shouted from the porch. I bounced a bit while dragging Luke to the lake.

"Take off your clothes!" I egged him on.

"This isnt the circumstance that I thought I would hear you saying that in." He replied, pulling his tie off. The tips of my ears were burning at this.

"Was there a circumstance that you imagined me asking you to take off your clothes." I wiggled my eyebrows at him and he just rolled his eyes.

"The world may never know." He was rid of his shirt now. His toned chest shone in the sun.

*Damn he is actually ripped.*

I could feel myself ogling but I couldn't stop myself. I was still fully clothed.

"Why do I have on less clothing than you." He complained. "Turn around." He commanded, I did so with confusion. He pulled the zipper of my dress down and pulled at the straps. Now I was the one thinking not-so-clean things.

*What did you get yourself into Y/n?*

I let the dress slide from my shoulders to show my bikini. It had a yellow sunflower top and plain white bottoms.

"No way." He deadpanned, not hiding how he was looking at my body.

"What?" He pulled his pants down to show sunflower swim trunks with a white background.

"Oh my god we look like a cringy couple." I held my hand over my mouth, trying not to laugh like an insane person. Sooner we were in the cold lake, beginning the game.

"Alright, newest family member is it." Jess pointed to Luke and I shrugged. Everyone shifted around the area and the game began.

"Marco!" He shouted. A chorus of voices responded with Polo. "Oh God." I could hear him mutter with a snicker.

I swam silently beside him, hoping he wouldn't yell Marco.

But we know what kind of luck I have.

"Marco!"

"Shit." I whispered right next to him, attempting to go under to avoid being tagged. But his reflexes were too fast. He grabbed me with both arms, pulling me to him and opening his eyes.

"You're it." That's when I felt it, I knew I would remember this feeling for a long time.

The spark.

And before I knew it, he kissed my lips quickly. He pulled away and let go of me.

"Don't cheat! Close your eyes." He left me completely in the dark on the situation that just ensued.

I'm gonna kill this man.

The game ended after 45 minutes. I was it twice because I'm kind of a slow swimmer.

I jogged up to Luke, who was coming out of the lake. I pulled him aside, bringing him down to my level.

"What was that." I whispered exasperatedly.

"Well you said you felt bad that I had to fake this. To be truthful, not much of this is faking for me. Is it for you? Do you wanna keep this a fake thing?" His finger gestured between us. My brows furrowed at the question.

*Of course not.*

"Are you sure?"

"How many times are you gonna ask me that." He laughed, bringing me into another kiss.

*This is going to be quite the story to tell people.*

#luke alvez #luke alvez x reader #criminal minds cast #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fic #criminal minds #spencer reid

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dolldirector · 3 years

Text

Fallen Realm Playlist Masterpost

Big infodump under the read more, if you like my OCs and/or agree with my flawless music taste this should be interdasting

1. MUSE - Thought Contagion

Vampire stuff, punk vibes, a nod to thriller, all of the above fit the mood of a FR show + the song is genuinely very good and I could see it being used on stage easily.

2. PAIN - Call Me

Absolute banger. But that's besides the point. I see this as being the bassist Jez/Jamie's song (with a side of Deuce as the second vocalist). Jez is a fairly quiet lad who generally keeps to himself but I always imagined that he’d be secretly very flirty and cheeky, but would mostly only really express it via music. I actually wrote a lil short story where most of FR's band (minus Rex and Isabella) find themselves in some dive bar after a show, and end up performing in the place of the no-show band that was meant to be there that night. That band ends up being the very same one that kicked Jez out, so it’s a bit of a revenge story for him. This short is on my discord by the by.

3. Emigrate - Eat You Alive

Oh boy, this is a strong one. Basically, just watch this video but pretend that Axl is Richard (the frontman). That’s it. That’s the explanation.

Being serious though, RZK is and always has been a huge influence for Axl's visual design, mannerisms and on-stage behaviours. On top of that, this is 100% the type of music he'd listen to, and the lyrics may as well just be plucked right outta his brain. Are the words meant to be aimed at Valeriya in a threatening way? Or is it a cheeky flirt with Trinity? Both? Neither? We’ll never know.

Also, completely unrelated I’m sure, here’s a wip you may or may not be able to force me to finish on stream via channel points soon...

4. Axel One - Out of the Dark

Can't exactly say much about this one cause it's spoilers, but I will say it's less about the song itself and more about the video, and that it does concern the one FR character who is already dead when the story begins.

5. Lord of the Lost - Raining Stars

Just seems to me like a real good song to perform to. I can imagine seeing acrobatic stunts in slow-mo to this track. That’s it for this one, just “I just think they’re neat”. Gorgeous song and video by an amazing band anyway though.

6. Oomph! - Supernova

Kinda the same deal as the Emigrate song, you can just insert Axl into this one in Dero’s place, along with Jez, Vlad, and Thatch. Once again the style and lyrics fit him perfectly, and this one earns bonus points since Dero is actually Axl's canon voiceclaim - specifically in this era of Oomph!’s music too.

7. Die Kreatur - Kälter als der Tod

At the risk of this thread becoming Oops All Axl TM - AH YES. This one is perfect for the point where Axl finally gets the fuck over himself, and stops being horrible to Vlad because of guitar jealousy, and they become bros.

Realistically, I doubt that Vlad - the clueless human vampire fanatic - will ever realise that Axl is a real actual vampire, but he'd be so glad that they seem to have this ~shared interest~ in them, and he'd by hyped as heck to do a performance like this with his guitar buddy. By the way, Vlad wonders to himself, isn’t it odd that he’s never seen Axl putting his fake fangs in?? Weird

As for the girl on the altar, there are a couple ideas I’ve toyed with. Random audience member for fun. Trinity but Axl gets mad jealous even though he thought and said he wouldn't. (No sharing!! Not even for jokes.) Valeriya but the poor thing is scared to the point of tears because this is just a little too close to a real experience for her and Vlad just can't figure out why. Axl insists she’s just being dramatic. Rex has to rescue her because she’s too shy to put her foot down.

Or perhaps Isabella would wanna join in, but she can't take it seriously and keeps laughing which just causes a chain reaction every time with even Axl cracking a smile. There are like a million cut takes now. Send help.

All in all a fun crossover to think about.

8. Adelitas Way - Still Hungry

This one is just Diesel’s anthem. This is the story of a young punk who can’t stop, won’t stop, never gives up and needs more. Right kinda music for him too.

9. MONO INC. - Shining Light

100% a full-cast song. I feel like the lyrics apply to a number of different things about various members of the circus' backstories, and their found family vibe together - if you think about them in super vague terms, at least. I liked to consider the vocals a duet between Rex and Isabella, being the two singers, but there are a couple lines that are kinda too adult for Bella and would make the duet sorta odd so ehhh 90% of it can be that, let’s say. (This is baring in mind that Isabella is an orphaned minor and Rex is like a father figure for her - as he kinda is for many of the members of the circus)

I also did a doodle of this. This one will also be on the force-me-to-work-on-this-WIP-live pile.

9.5. Lacrimosa - Lichtgestalt a.k.a the original version of Shining Light

Same song, just German and carrying a much darker, creepier tone. It fits in new, fun ways.

10. Oomph! - Viel zu Tief

OOPS ALL AXL TM

Lyrics are very important for this one. Once again, music is the right style, Dero is still his voiceclaim, and Axl actually speaks German in canon (and NO I didn’t do that just so Oomph! songs fit him better, shUT UP)

11. Pet Shop Boys - It’s a Sin

Bit out of left field for this playlist, sure, but with all the controversy and extremely shakey morals in FR's world and with its characters, this one just seems fitting. Plus I'd want em to cover it for a show. Banger.

Honorable mention goes to Ghost’s cover of this song. I don’t even listen to Ghost but my reaction upon finding out this exists was like “lmao yes, of course, why wouldn’t they”.

This song in general I associate instinctively with Vlad, purely because its 80s and campy and I feel like he’d be the type to listen to Ghost.

12. Destiny Potato - Lunatic

Very strongly feel this is a performance song featuring Isabella. This song fits the character - and in particular her tragic backstoryTM pretty well. I’d even go so far as to say the singer would be a pretty good voiceclaim for her if her voice wasn’t meant to be more robotic in canon. This is pretty close to what I imagine, though. Strong n sweet.

13. Nightwish - I Want My Tears Back

One of the first songs I imagined to go well with stage performances. This one for sure would be a duet between Rex and Isabella.

Plus at about 3:10 there's a long solo with a bit of back-and-forth between the guitar and hurdy gurdy (I think?) that I could 100% see Axl and Vlad doing on guitar and keytar respectively.

14. Lord of the Lost - Drag Me To Hell

Yeah this one is just Axl @ his ex

15. Lindemann - Steh Auf!

Bleib nicht liegen, es wär schade - Zirkus ist heut in der Stadt

So, this would be from Isabella’s perspective. Did I mention she was orphaned? Yeah. I guess this one is a little dark.

16. Otetsu & GUMI - Disordered Self-Restraint Girl

The song itself seems to be the story of a child who is trying to coax their parent/guardian into getting up and doing things, not realising that parent had passed away from a drug overdose. Drugs isn’t the way Isabella’s parents died, but the rest of the song fits that part of her backstory imo. Plus, it’s German, and Isabella is German, so yay!

Uh oh, vocaloid.

For a long time I've associated this one with Valeria, and her feelings towards the circus in the early days. After she's accidentally turned by Axl, Val gets effectively kidnapped by FR, taken in before she can even regain consciousness and completely against her will, since it would be incredibly irresponsible of them to just leave a fresh new vampire out in the world so they kinda don't have a choice. While she eventually finds her place and elects to stay after some time has passed, there was a period of time where she definitely would have felt trapped.

This is without even going into the fact that she's now stuck travelling and living with her would-be murderer, and - due to the fact that half of the circus don't even know non-humans exist, let alone what actually happened to Valeria - many of the people around her don't seem to care, or simply do not understand why she's so scared and stressed. It leaves her, at times, feeling like she could be killed tomorrow and nobody would give a shit.

Showtime, katanamochi bunbun furimawashi kubi kara ue hanetobashite mo - ashita ni nareba minna motodoori, waratte yurushite

Translation: Showtime, even if a sword wielder slices my head and makes it fly off, tomorrow everything continues as usual, smiling, forgiving

(Don't worry, in reality Rex, Diesel, and Thatch are there for her & understand the shit she's going through. I promise the folks in the circus do actually care. It's just hard for her to see it in this period of time.)

(There will almost definitely be more songs and doodles added here in the future, but for now that’s all folks!)

#fallen realm #playlist #masterpost #ocs

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getitinbusan · 4 years

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Only Love Can Hurt Like This -4

Im Jaebeom - Angst

Y/N doesn't want a relationship, especially not with an idol. Jaebeom only wants her.

Love after heartbreak and all the things that fall in between.

Angst, Cheating, Fluff, Smut

A new series inspired by lyrics, each chapter has a specific song that goes with it.

Chapter 1: Nice To Meet Ya

Chapter 2: Blood In The Cut

Chapter 3: Liability

Chapter 4:

Chapter 5: Only Love Can Hurt Like This

Chapter 4: That's Just The Way You Make Me Feel

You keep on asking me the same questions (why?)

And second guessing all my intentions

You've got the answers to my confessions

You know I love it, so please don't stop it

So real, so good, so fuckin' real

The way you make me feel Janel Monae.

He knew he fucked up and he didn't know what to do about it. He'd finally made some headway and now he was back to square one.

So, the next day he was back. Standing in front of your counter he held out a cup of Hotteok.

Before he could speak you jumped in, "See JB, the way this whole retail thing works is, you pick something you want that I'm selling, then give me money for it. Nowhere in the scenario do you bring me random shit just because."

Your eyes were red, he felt terrible, after only 2 conversations he'd already managed to hurt you.

"It's not random shit, it's an apology. I'm sorry I drew attention to you last night." he paused, "you don't deserve to be attacked like that."

You turned away trying to gain your composure, "The one thing I've learned through all this is to never apologize for showing your feelings. When you do, you're apologizing for the truth."

You looked back, "I've never apologized for loving Yoongi, because it was real whether people want to believe it or not."

You sighed, "You didn't do anything wrong. You didn't put the target on my back JB it's been there a while, I'm just sad because now you've got one too."

His heart sank when he realized that you weren't choosing loneliness to protect yourself, you were keeping your distance so he wouldn't get dragged into it.

He placed his large hand over yours as it lay on the counter. "There's only one thing that's going to make me walk away from you." He tipped your chin so you were forced to look into his eyes, "Tell me you don't want me here."

The door chimed, you were no longer alone.

"Like I said yesterday, it's bad business for me to chase away customers, stay as long as you want."

He smiled brightly, "That's not a no."

Taking the Hotteok from the counter you were still unsure, but he was right, it wasn't a no.

………………………

Standing at the bar in the exact spot you'd met him, you'd hoped he'd be here tonight. You felt like a desperate fool with a schoolgirl crush.

Three days had passed since you'd last seen him and despite your best efforts, you found yourself missing him. You hated the way your heart hurt, of course he'd given up why would this be a surprise?

A hand reached around placing a drink on the bar in front of you. "You look like you could use this, still pining over Min Yoongi?"

"Actually I'm waiting for a friend Minho."

"I could be your friend tonight Y/N. I guarantee I can get you to stop thinking about him," he grabbed your ass.

"No thanks, I don't think 5 minutes in your bed will change my world."

He grabbed the drink back, "No wonder he cheated on you, you're such a bitch."

Dumb, Dumb, Dumb...you'd let your guard down and everything was feeling all too personal. Shooting back the last of your Soju you grabbed your jacket and made for the exit.

"You're not leaving when I just got here?"

Your traitorous heart fluttered, "I didn't know I was supposed to be waiting."

His grin got bigger, "Are you mad because maybe you actually missed me a little?"

Mad, sad, who could tell them apart anymore?

"Yeah, actually I am and I'm livid with myself for it."

He put his hand on your waist, "Hey, I'm sorry, I got called for re shoots."

His thumb rubbed over your hip soothingly, "I only have your work number...I just got back and I was hoping you'd be here"

A voice shouted from across the bar "Don't waste your time on that one JB, come sit with us"

You closed your eyes trying to keep the tears at bay, "You heard the man. I'm leaving anyway, I guess I'll see ya around."

Shooting a look at Minho he ran out the door to catch up with you.

Standing at the curb waiting for a cab he reached his hand out to you. "I wanted to be with you tonight, and I'm pretty sure you wanted to be with me. It's still early, let's go somewhere okay, can we still do that?"

Placing your hand in his, "Only if we're alone...and there's alcohol."

He smiled victorious, "I think I know a place."

Walking up the crowded street you felt better, anonymous. He kept squeezing your hand making sure you hadn't slipped away.

"Right here," he stopped in front of a pink neon lit Karaoke Bar.

"Karaoke? I think one of us has an extremely unfair advantage JB."

"Don't worry I'll let you win."

Stepping closer to him you kissed his cheek, "Why are you being so nice to me JB?"

"Y/N, why do you keep questioning my motives?"

His hand ran up your arm, "I hate that you've been mistreated for so long that you don't realize what normal behavior is."

He held the door open for you, "How's a private room and bottle service sound?"

................................

You consumed copious amounts of Grey Goose as you took turns performing for one another. What you lacked in vocal talent you made up for in your ability to mimic choreography.

"I think I've lost my voice," you shouted after your efforts to sing Itzy's Wannabe.

"I'm going to have to tell JYP about you, maybe with some training you can debut next year and come on tour with us," he laughed.

He queued up the next song, "Come here, I want to dance with you."

You moved into his waiting arms and allowed yourself to surrender to his pursuits. His song came on and you laughed, "it's so cheesy Jaebeom-ah!"

He sang anyway,

Our love will lead the way for us

If the road ahead is not so easy

Like a guiding star

I'll be there for you if you should need me

You don't have to change a thing

I love you just the way you are

You let your head rest on his chest, his heartbeat was louder, more important than the words he was singing.

Glad he was holding you up, you felt a little drunk, a little in love and for once, you weren't going to stop yourself.

He kissed the top of your head and held on a little tighter, "So does this mean you'll finally give me your number?"

You looked up at him nodding, locking eyes he moved slowly closer, lips almost touching ...until his phone went off.

He frowned, "Fuck, it's management. Sorry I've got to check in. Just stay in my arms ok?"

"You're going to read texts over my shoulder? How romantic," you jibed, but you didn't break away.

JYP: Dispatch has reached out to us for comment regarding a new dating scandal. They were tipped off that you were with Y/N at Cakeshop Night Club tonight and now they are outside of the Karaoke bar waiting for photos. We need to discuss your intentions immediately. A car will pick you up in 15 mins, wait inside for security. Do not leave the building together as it is still controllable speculation.

You could feel his body react to what he was reading, deep breaths, tensed muscles and finally pulling you in tightly. "What is it J?"

"I've got to get you out of here, the press are outside"

He handed you his phone, "add your number."

But JYPs text was still open and you saw every word.

You keyed in your info and switched it off before handing it back.

You breathed deep, "You know, sneaking in and out of buildings is my specialty," You put your hand over his heart and gave a sad smile.

"Don't worry about me. I'm sure there's a back entrance, I'll just grab a cab home. If you go out the front they'll be too busy taking photos of you, they'll never notice me."

You tried to sound confident and uncaring so he'd do what was best but Jaebeom had his own plan.

"Get your stuff, we're going out the front together."

He pulled your hand through the bar and out the front door. Lights flashed as they took their photos for tomorrow's headlines.

Hailing a cab he leaned over and kissed your lips, "I'm going to call you as soon as I can okay?"

You weren't okay, your first kiss would be your last kiss. Your smile hid the stabbing pain in your heart, you knew it was over before it had started.

"Jaebeom," you called him back after he closed the car door behind you, "It's been a really great time."

He smiled and waved.

Getting into the companies blacked out Suburban he was happy, he was going to stand his ground.

He'd felt bad that your first kiss had been under these circumstances so he opened his phone to text you a quick apology.

Searching the contacts he found your entry, "I'm sorry" with random numbers underneath.

#Jaebeom #jaebum #got 7 #im jaeboem #got 7 jaebeom

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 3 years

Text

Sorry I haven't been active beyond shitposts lately, I've been busy getting my thesis up and running and barely have time or brainpower to spare to write at night before I pass out

On the bright side I read 6 pages of an academic paper this week and understood EVERYTHING. Yes I had to Google every other word (not literally, but it sure felt like it at times) but I actually understood it all in the end and I am so proud of myself.

6 pages, u might say, 6 pages is all u did in 3 days?? Well... Yeah XD It's a math and theory based paper, have mercy pls. I gotta work everything out on paper and then take notes that are informative enough for future reference and I get tired after every 2 pages to the point I'm falling asleep at my desk... I have a poor work ethic.

I also think I'm close to tying in what I wanna do to Systems Theory like my prof. Wants. He's very into reconstructability analysis and multidimensional relations with his probabilistic databases and well. I found that probabilistic deductive databases are a thing and You Know Me...

There's this thing called a trilattice right. And it consists of 3 partial orderings on the same set each going a different direction with each direction also being a lattice, it's actually *really* cool. Anyway, my profs catchphrase is BASICALLY "information is constraint" and GUESS WHAT BABEY. One of those partial orderings on the trilattice for the rules in the PDDB (probabilistic deductive database) is named Knowledge in a interval of [0,1] because it tells you the amount of information that specific fact gives you!

So I'm gonna ask him for help tomorrow morning to see if that can't be tied back in to a sort of reconstruction but for probabilistic deductive databases and their rules. Because with regular probabilistic databases it's easy to have 3 variables (ABC) then split into 2 (AB) and 2 (BC), and then reconstruct it from there right? But. I don't know how that would be possible with Rules based on facts and logic not just probabilities, and I wanna know if it's even possible because there IS still math involved with the rules, I just don't know if I'd be able to reconstruct anything with it cuz I don't even know the first step to that problem cuz it seems so different from the Regular PDB reconstruction problem and I GUESS that's what the whole thesis research thing is for, but STILL. I am just. So Tired. Let me sleep.

I put off so much work today just to do more research on my thesis like a CHUMP. I should've finished my parallel programming hw, but I didn't. Haha. I put it off too long already it's due Friday XD

Oh also I start work tomorrow so I will have even less time. But I am starting work!!! I'm actually kinda excited. I'm gonna be TAing 2 classes which sounds cool! except a lot of the students are my friends (4/5 in one class and 2/2 in the other!!). So it will be kinda awkward since I am the extra help session. At some point my prof (same one who is my thesis advisor) wants me to actually teach an entire lesson myself. I am so nervous I have super bad stage fright lol. Actually tho, these two classes tie right into my thesis subject so hopefully by then I will be well read on all the subjects necessary to teach. I can, at the very least, teach them reconstruction. Maybe not much else, but I got that going for me haha

Oh God what happened I was gonna go to bed with an apology like, "yes Ive just shitpost for the past like week sorry about that" but here I am 1am, meeting at 11am (I can't be fully rested on sub-11/12 hours of sleep fml), just rambling about my life I am so sorry

You guys wanna see a candle I made today as a gift for actually reading this (and as part of the apology)

It's so beautiful

I was gonna put one of my borderlands stickers on but I was worried it'd peel when I lit it, so I chose a sticker I had 2 copies of

My mom thinks it's hilarious and that's all I needed I also got her to say "big yikes" today because we spilled wax on the oven mitts my power grows

#Sleeping like. 13+ hours a day + naps is totally normal right #Totally.#You wanna hear someone frantically yell about probabilistic databases? No? Toobadyourereadingitanyway #Jkjk #Cruddy rambles

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erismerald · 4 years

Text

MY NEW ROAD - Chapter 1

» Older Daniel Diaz x reader

» Warnings: mature, romance, blood, gang

Chapter 2

» So i was hoping i could read something about daniel diaz, at the end of 5 ep, and as i was sick of waiting, so i decided to write a long short about older daniel diaz, so let's go :)

And there I was, in this moment i was terrified, I could I feel my blood coming out of my belly, it hurts a lot... I couldn't breathe, or think, to be honest I didn't know what to do... Who is he? Why is he here? For a few seconds i felt my body being lifted up.

" Y/N ? Oh please wake up... ahhh SEAN!!!!"

I recognized this voice, but I just let my eyes close, I felt my body fall asleep.

*A FEW HOURS EARLIER*

So HI!! My name is y/n, im 17 and right now I'm living on my own in Mexico, more property in puerto lobos.

I'm a very simple girl, I grew up in LA with my grandparents, I never met my parents, and during my life, my grandparents never told me about their daughter, they just told me that she had abandoned me when I was Little, and as for my father, they didn't know who she was, so I never really cared about that.

I've been living here for about six weeks,I study in a small americam school, near here. I'm loving living here I never thought, that a dream I had since I was little would come true so soon, I decided to live here, because I love Mexican culture and not to mention that living by the beach never tires anyone, and I still have the privilege of seeing the sunset disappear into the waves...

Since I was a child I was very shy and I don't know how to express myself to others anht this is the reason why I've not be able to make friends in this new school yet, I feel ashamed when they look at me or try to talk to me, it's complicated, however, I've always managed to make some friends in LA, people I talk to almost every single day.

it's already 7 am i think i should be preparing for school but i think laziness has won ahaha, I got up and tried to take as little time as possible, I don't want to be late again or Ms. Lopez will kick me out of her class again.

I was new to that school and it wasn't the first time I was late, which I can say I love sleeping, but I have to work harder to make sure that doesn't happen, and I'm going to start right now haha.

I tried to take as little time as possible, of course that for me it's kind of impossible, because, I still had to take a shower before going, but I think at least I won't be late this time, I look at the clock and OMG is already 7:50 and the classes start at 8:00, ahhhhh how will I get to school in 10... Afff so much effort for nothing, well at least I can still get to the beginning of the first class.

On the way to school, I saw him again... I think his name is Daniel, he's from my class but I never talked to him before, and to be honest, I never had the courage to talk to him, well... not only with him, I think with everyone in general, so far I haven't made any friends, except the lady from the apartment next door, and we only talk on Sundays, because we have the same way when we go to church.

I think I've been looking at him too long... why do I say that? He's looking at me right now. I can't deny it he's beautiful... he's so mysterious, but from what I've seen of him, at school he's very fun, reserved, but fun.

I felt him staring at me, which made me completely ashamed, and my only option for not having to talk to him was to hit him and not, to look at him as I passed by, even with my back to him his gaze managed to make me feel a huge chill, but it's a good thing that I'm already arriving at school.

For real I didn't know what to tell him anyways.

When i arrived at school i came across Ms.Lopez on the way. And I think it was at this moment that I realized I was completely fucked up, I tried to go unnoticed, but without success.

And when I turned back I only saw her ferocious gaze directed at me.

"Miss l/n shouldn't be in class already. Preferably sitting at your desk waiting for me." - she looked at me with a deadly look on her face

"oh I finally find you y/n, thx for waiting for me, and here you have your Spanish book that you lent me." He looked at me and winked at me, so that I could continue with the theater.

"O-of course I do, Daniel, there's nothing to be thankful for" he stands next to me and takes my hand. And he gave me the book, I felt my heart go off a thousand an hour...When I lifted my face I saw his eyes glued on me, why did he protect me?

"Is that why you were late?" She looked at me and then at Daniel, I felt the anger in her eyes

"yes i decided to wait for daniel" i smiled at her, and i felt daniel put himself behind me

"Vamos, no te enojes con ella, maestra. Sólo fue esta vez (Come on, don't get mad at her, teacher. It was just this time .)" Daniel grabbed my shoulders and spoke, I saw Ms. Lopez calm her eyes and take a deep breath.

"Hum being so, i let you pass your delay this time you two have 5 minutes to introduce you in my class, and miss L/N thank the boy Daniel for helping her " his voice was calm now but his words were cold.

She continued on her way to the classroom, and I hear Daniel laughed

"You're welcome!" daniel said as my body moved, his voice was now hoarse, I sounded hypnotized by the voice of him.

"T-thank you for helping me." I tried to be short and quick in my answer. I was so nervous and idk why.

"let's go to class before Ms. Lopez decides to murder us, because we're late" daniel just went on her way but stopped 3 steps ahead of me.

"will have to pull you?" he laughs softly and throws a half smile, my heart, jumped a beat when i saw that smile.

"Y-yes" I just followed him.... When we arrived in the room each one sat in his seat, but for some reason, Daniel kept looking at me and it made me nervous for the rest of the time.

During the rest of the day, everything went as usual, except for the failed attempt by me to escape Daniel's gaze, I don't know what he was looking for in me, but I think I managed to make him lose interest for a while. I think.

When I finally rang the exit bell, I was the first to leave for the first time, I didn't want to know anything else, I just wanted to get home and enjoy being alone.

When I walked through the school gate, I took a deep breath and tried to rearrange my ideas, how can something as simple as talking to a person make me so nervous?

I'll speed up the walk and look at the sky and then at the sea at the end of the street to calm myself down. I didn't understand what was going on this day but I just asked it to end quickly. Yeah, to tell you the truth, I've never had a boy look at me for so long, am I getting a crush on him? AHHHHH well I hope not.

When I was almost at home, I felt a chill on my back and soon I could be able to realized what was happening....

"Are you trying to avoid me?" Not that voice, not again.

I turned slowly and there he was, did he follow me? When I looked at him I felt my face boiling with shame.

"Did the Cat eat your tongue?" he looked at me and laughed, and began to approach me.

I tried to ignore to not have to answer, I really suffered from many anxiety problems and did not know what to do in these situations.

"okay i got you, you don't want to talk to me don't worry" he looked at the floor and his cheerful expression went to sadness

"well see you tomorrow at school" when he was going to turn around and continue on his way i screamed

"WAIT"

He turned to me and smiled... OH God that smile was so sweet

"I thought you weren't gonna answer ahaha."

"I'm not ignoring you, or avoiding you...I'm just too shy to talk" I couldn't face his eyes so I just looked at the ground.

"Are you sure? I didn't want to get into it with Ms Lopez, but I knew if I didn't, she'd kick you out of her class" when I looked up I came across the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen.

It made me blush, involuntarily, I didn't know what to say.

"thank you...and it's okay, I'd be kicked out if it wasn't for you too, so thank you for helping me."

"You're welcome, I've always seen you being very shy with everyone and you don't seem to be the kind of person who would be late on purpose, well, I won't take up your time. See you tomorrow"

he said with a perverse smile on his face

"Oh and if tomorrow you want company for the school I can wait here for you".

I didn't have time to say anything else I just agreed and entered the building.

When I got home I lay on the couch, looking at the ceiling, trying to see what had happened, I didn't notice it, but I felt my body tired and ended up falling asleep.

"Daniel... Something about him attracted me...'

I opened my eyes very slowly, I looked at the window and it was already dark, I picked up my phone and turned it on, I had 5 unanswered calls from my grandmother, this was strange she didn't call me so often

I dialed her number and called...

"y/n honey is you?"

"yes Grandma, what's going on? I'm sorry I was so tired that I fell asleep and didn't hear you call".

Without telling me anything else she felt like she was crying, but what happened to make my grandmother cry she hardly ever does, and when I say that she doesn't, it's because it's rare.

"Honey, I have something to tell you... Your mother is looking for you," those words left me unanswered, my mother?

No...

Couldn't be, my mother abandoned me 16 years ago, for me she died... I started crying, that person who abandoned me 16 years ago, now its looking for me why? I had so many questions in my mind, I couldn't talk to anybody, I just need some time.

"honey are there? Y/n?" My grandmother called me...

"I'm sorry Grandma, I need to think a little, I'll call you later."

"darling no-" i hung up on her, i don't like to do this but i need time to process

I got up, grabbed my jacket and went out towards the beachWhen I got there I sat down on the sand, and watched the sea, and the waves coming at me, I didn't want to believe that my mother was looking for me, if she hadn't wanted me in 16 years, she wouldn't want me now.... Now I did not even want her back

At that moment I felt that I was not alone there, I turned around and saw a group of people coming towards me.

I got up quickly and tried to get out of there, but it was too late.

Fear sometimes makes us irrational, and at this moment I did not know what to do, I did not know how to react, I was scared, I felt one of the men grabbing me by the arms, and attached me to his body

"hey you, don't move so much kittens, let's talk"

The second man spoke and stood in front of me, and grabbed my face forcing me to look at him.

"so you're the Diaz little princess aren't you?" I wasn't noticing anything, I just tried to get away but without success, I wonder what would happen to me...

I tried to fight and I tried to let go, but unfortunately I only did worse, he pressed himself behind my back and won't let me go.

"Let's teach that boy a lesson, that's what he and his brother will pay to judge us dumb."

One of them pulled a knife out of his waist and approached me...

"NO PLEASE DON'T"

I started screaming, and crying madly, I was now completely scared.

At that very moment, I felt the blade pierce my skin... I didn't know what to do, I just tried to struggle

But when I turned my head, there he was, out of nowhere, the people around me were thrown away, I felt my body fall into the sand...

" Y/N ? Oh please wake up... ahhh SEAN!!!!"

I recognized this voice, but I just let my eyes close, I felt my body fall asleep...

But to be honest I felt my body warm, from this moment on, it just got dark.

_______________________________________

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